Title: Kiss Me!

Rating: R

Summary: Gossip. And lots of it.

Hey everyone, I've back. I just want to say thanks for all your fantastic reviews this summer. For the seven weeks I was away, my gandmother passed away and my guitar got stolen. Your reviews cheered me up more than you may know. It was helpful to be able to check once a week and see your appreciation of my writing. Thanks a million.

This chapter is made up entirely of various Hogwartsian gossip. Once again, the chapter is made up of dialogue. Hopefully it won't be nearly as confusing as the last chapter. Sometimes you'll know who at least one of the gossipers are, sometimes you'll who all of them are, and sometimes you won't know who any of them are. Be adventurous, and discover for yourself.

ENJOY!

-- Library gossip --

"Hey Orla! Did you hear? About Potter and Malfoy?"

"I heard they were breaking up."

"No way!"

"Not a chance!"

"They're not breaking up. But the fight they had after the incident with that Chang girl... I don't envy anyone who witnessed that."

"I heard Malfoy punched him."

"No he didn't, Dennis. I'm friends with Euan Abercrombie in Gryffindor. He says it was in the Gryffindor common room, and that it was mostly just a loud argument. Malfoy thought for sure Potter was the one who kissed Chang. But Potter swears it was Chang who kissed him."

-- Ravenclaw common room gossip --

"Could you check my star chart for me?"

"Sure."

"Well, while she's doing that... did you hear about that Hermione Granger?"

"No! What!?"

"That girl is such a know-it-all."

"You've made a mistake on your chart, Michael. The cluster of stars near your depiction of Mercury are not in their proper placements. Yeah, that Granger girl really is a know-it-all. Tell us about her, Lisa."

"Well it turns out she's a... well, come on girls, we've known it since First Year."

"She really is!?"

"Yes. Apparently that Weasley boy broke up with her on the grounds that she was in love... with another girl."

"That boy sure doesn't know how to dance -"

"Yes, we know Padma. You tell us every time we mention him or the Yule Ball."

"Well, I'm just trying to be helpful."

"Anyway, turns out we all know who she's supposedly in love with."

"Who is it?"

/Rapid footsteps/

"Hey girls! Did you hear about Hermione Granger?"

"Sit down, Terry. We've already heard."

"Yeah... apparently that Weasley boy broke up with her on the grounds that she was already in love... with another girl."

"That boy is simply miserable at dancing..."

"Oh Padma."

-- Hospital wing gossip --

"Hey, did you /cough/ hear about that girl in Slytherin?"

"What girl in /sneeze/ Slyderin?"

"I don't /cough/ know her name. She's friends with Draco Malfoy."

"Oh I think I know the one."

"Well, just before I checked in here, I stumbled across her and that girl in Gryffindor in the middle of a mighty /cough/ - ugh - a mighty fine snogging session."

"What girl in Gryffindor?"

"The bushy-haired one."

"Oh yes. Well do you think that means something?"

"Nah, I bet they just decided to do it for the fun of it."

"Yeah, they're probably not /sneeze/ lesbians."

"Definitely not."

-- Great Hall gossip --

"HEY! ABBOTT! DID YOU HEAR?"

"HEAR WHAT?"

"ABOUT MALFOY AND POTTER."

"NO, WHAT?"

"THEY'RE BACK TOGETHER!"

"WHEN DID THEY BREAK UP?"

"I DON'T KNOW, BUT THEY'RE TOGETHER."

"WELL THAT'S NICE."

"YEAH."

"HEY, ZABINI!"

"YES ABBOTT?"

"WHY ARE YOU TALKING TO ME?"

-- Still Great Hall gossip --

"Hey Ginny?"

"Yes Colin?"

"Did you hear about Hermione?"

"Probably. Most likely from Hermione herself."

"Oh. Hey Parvati?"

"Yes Colin?"

"Did you hear about Hermione?"

"Probably. I share a dorm with her, you know."

"Oh. Hey Ron?"

"Yes Colin?"

"Did you hear about Hermione?"

"Colin! Stop gossiping before I steal that camera and shove it down your throat."

"Okay."

-- Great Hall gossip again --

"EVERYONE SHUT UP! THEY'RE COMING!"

/Complete silence from Great Hall, laughter from doors/

/Long pause, during which the four arrivlas exchange a glance/

"Okay, Harry and I are still dating. So you can keep your hair on."

"Yes, and Pansy and I are dating so you can all freak out and talk about it with your friends now."

/Immediate burst of conversation from all areas of the Great Hall/

"Hey you guys?"

/Four exasperated sighs/

"Yes Colin?"

"Did you hear about... oh, nevermind."

Sorry if that was confusing and odd. Not to mention short. I PROMISE that the next chapter will be normal. This idea hit me, and I HAD to write about it. Speaking of being forced to write something, an idea popped into my a few weeks ago, and I have been furiously tweaking at it, writing about it and plotting it. This idea is called "Waltzing Potatoes" and will be put up here as soon as I get it out of my car, which is stranded in a city half-an-hour away from me. (It broke down over the weekend, and I had to take a taxi home - 65.00 $) Should be out relatively soon, though. I'll let you know more about it if I release a chapter for this story before it gets up. Please review!