Author's note: This was inspired by: 1.) Cmdrtsl's ranting about Jasmine's clothes, 2.) Talia's fanfic, which reminded me of how funny Prince Achmed is, and who agrees with me that he is probably a lecher, and 3.) The Harry Potter drabbles at hp100 on Livejournal.

The Lady and the Tiger
By Heather Burk

Achmed waited for the sultan to fetch his bride, admiring the Menagerie's heady perfumes and cool breezes. He'd enjoy living here, in Paradise.

As if following his thoughts, an houri approached. Probably a servant, he thought, from her revealing garb.

Leaning towards her: "I will wed your mistress soon," his hand brushed her thigh, "but don't let that deter you." Her expression was unreadable.

 "Jasmine! There you are!" The sultan ran towards them, with a tiger twice his size. "Ah, you've met." Chuckling quietly, Sultan left.

Slowly Achmed turned, towards the predatory faces of both lady and tiger.

"Sic 'im."