Newsie's Fables

Author: Inquisitive (Ink)

Rating: PG-13

Disclaimer: I own very little. Disney owns Newsies, Aesop owns the fables, other stuff belongs to other people, Ink belongs to me.

*Moral- Don't sue me.

A/N[1]: Hi everyone! (Waves enthusiastically.) This beautiful piece of artistic wonder is my very first fanfic ever! (Cheers!) So please read, review, and tell me what you think. Oh yeah, and anything in bold, is the real fable.

Tale 1: The Fox and the Hedgehog

Snoody walks calmly to center stage, carrying a giant storybook. He opens it and begins reading.

Snoody: "A fox in some unaccountable fashion got his tail entangled in a thicket which held him as closely as though he had been caught in a trap,"

Here Snoody pauses, looking behind him, there stood Bumlets holding a stick in each hand.

Snoody: "Uh... Ink?"

Ink pokes her head out from back stage.

Ink: "Yeah?"

Snoody: "Wheres da fox?"

Ink: "....."

She thinks for a minute.

Ink: "JACK!"

Jack is hiding backstage.

Jack: "I ain't goin'' out dere you can't make me."

Ink smiles mischievously, and ducks backstage. In a few moments a yelp is herd.

Jack: "Hey! Put me down!"

Big-Jack-in-a-fox-costume-toting-Brooklyn-newsie: "No."

Jack stops squirming and pouts, which is really cute because he has fox ears, a little fox nose, and whiskers.

Random audience members: "Awwww!"

The Big-Jack-in-a-fox-costume-toting-Brooklyn-newsie, drops Jack unceremoniously onto the stage in front of Bumlets the thicket.

Bumlets smirks, reaches down, and grabs Jacks tail, which promptly comes off in his hands.

Jack begins writhing around on the stage floor, pretending that his tale has been pulled off by a spiteful thicket.

Ink slaps her forehead and turns toward the crew.

Ink: "Who was in charge of costumes?"

Race tries to blend into the wall behind him.

Ink: "Race, why did his tale fall off?"

Race: "All you'se gave me to use was scotch tape an a papaclip, wha da ya 'spect?"

Ink: "Well can you fix it?"

Race: "Nope."

Ink: "Why not!?"

Race: "He bent da papaclip."

Ink looks at him in disbelief for a moment before shaking her head.

Ink: "Bumlets, just grab his suspenders. JACK! Stop that!"

Jack stops writhing and sits up, as Bumlets grabs his suspenders. He then begins poking Snoody, who has fallen asleep, with a random stick.

Snoody: "Wha? Oh, are we ready now?"

Ink nods, and gestures for him to continue.

Snoody: "In no time at all myriads of mosquitoes, seeing his plight, settled down upon him to enjoy a good meal undisturbed by his brush."

Dutchy and Specs, clad in pixie wings, and carrying crazy straws, skip onto the stage.

Ink: "What the Hell? RACE!"

Race: "What?"

Ink: "Why are my mosquitoes wearing PIXIE WINGS?"

Race: "You try finding bug wings on short notice."

Ink: "Okay. Never mind. Go on."

Dutchy and Specs, who had never stopped skipping around the stage, move toward Jack and begin poking him with the crazy straws.

Snoody: "A hedgehog who chanced to be strolling by felt sorry for the fox and approached him, saying..."

Spot steps onto the stage, and Dutchy begins giggling uncontrollably. Spot's hair is sticking strait up in every direction, looking hard enough to break off if someone touched it.

Ink: "Spot, how much gel do you have in your hair?"

Spot: "The whole jar."

Having said this nonchalantly, he turns, and smirks at Specs and Dutchy, as he raises his slingshot, aiming in their direction.

Both pixie bugs cower back in terror.

Spot: "Friend fox, you seem to be in a most unfortunate situation. Would you like me to make you more comfortable by driving off these blood sucking pests?"

He says this, advancing menacingly.

Snoody: "But..."

Spot stops and glowers at him.

Snoody gulps, and continues,

Snoody: "to the hedgehog's surprise the fox replied,"

Jack: Yes please, shoot to kill!"

Ink: JACK! That was NOT your line!"

Jack: "Fine."

Once again pouting, he says monotonously,

Jack: "No; thank you, my good friend, but I beg you not to disturb them."

Spot, looking agitated, says,

Spot: "And why the Hell not?"

Snoody: "Persisted the well-meaning hedgehog."

Specs and Dutchy are slowly growing board with poking Jack. All of a sudden, there is a mangled cry of pain and surprise. Dutchy has put the straw against Jacks bare arm and sucked into the other end of it, having created enough suction to leave a welt, he tried to take it out of his mouth, but his tongue was sucked into the straw, and he was now trying frantically to pull it back out while Jack swatted at him.

Spot burst out laughing, and Specs glares at him before going over to Dutchy and pulling him back, breaking the suction of the straw.

Jack winces, and rubs at the angry looking red welt forming on his arm, and tries to continue with the fable.

Jack: "Well you see,"

Spot: "Growled the fox!"

Snoody: "Replied the fox,"

He snaps, quickly becoming frustrated.

Jack: "These mosquito(es) idiots which you see have already drawn their fill of blood. If you chase the(m) morons away a fresh swarm of hungry ones will descend upon me and they will not leave a damn drop of blood in my freakin' body."

Spot looked highly amused, as Ink shakes her head in disgust, and walks off stage.

Snitch, with a coat hanger halo hanging over his head, steps onto the stage.

Snitch: "da moral of da story is dis; a needy thief steals more than one who enjoys plenty. What eva dat means."

He finishes before the curtain drops down.

A/N[2]: Thank you for giving my story a chance. Please, please, please, review! If you do, I promise to love you forever, and to speak fondly of you to all of the imaginary people who live in my closet.

~Ink