Disclaimer: Not mine, all Tolkein's. Lyrics property of Evanescence.
A/N: This fic is a total Angst Fest. So Much Angst. It'll be dark at times as well. Legolas is OOC and totally depressed. Why I always put my beloved through hell, I don't know, I'm just twisted..This is an Evanescence songfic. It'll feature their lyrics in each, using four songs over the course of the whole fic. If I'm slow in updating, forgive me but I'm working on several other things now, I just love multi tasking. :D No slash,you know the drill.I suppose u could consider this AU. Please review. And don't forget about my other fics, especially Brothers in Heart, if you are a previous reader of mine.
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Chapter I.
Legolas lay still upon his feather bed, shades of every green in the sheets that were arranged upon it. His gaze strayed out the window to the quiet dark of Ithilien and the starry indigo skies. Each of them, whether small or big, twinkled at him cheerfully. Their glimmers were reflected in his eyes, which seemed boundless in depth and yet there was an emptiness there now that had not been there before. So many stars there were, he thought. Children of the moon adorning the sky and guiding the lost. There was a time when those stars brought him such joy it was almost unnatural. But now, they seemed such trivial things. They offered him no comfort then, nor had they been able to for some time. Yet he gazed at them still, for whatever reason there was. The sky shimmered with those stars, reminding Legolas of the way the ocean glittered at the touch of sunlight.
Ah, the Sea, he thought. No matter how he tired, he could not help but think of it. Nay, he dwelled upon the thought. Each day, it occupied his mind. He yearned to hear the waves roll up on the shore, to smell the sea air, to hear the gulls crying and feel the sand beneath his feet. He wished to feel the ocean breeze running through his hair, releasing him. He wanted to let himself go down the path that led there.
Nay, you cannot, he reminded himself. For one moment, think of someone other than yourself. You led a band of Elves here to Ithilien, and they do not sail, but stay here in loyalty to their prince. You told Faramir you would rule this colony gladly. You promised Arwen and her children to attend tea with them one day. You cannot betray Gimli. You said that you would go to the Shire in the spring and pay the Gamgees a visit. You vowed to Aragorn that you would stay until he passed out of the circles of the world.
But he wanted it. He had never been so infatuated with anything in his life. And besides his curse of sea longing, there was a foreboding sense of melancholy hovering about him. He often thought of the inevitable loss he would one day have to bear. All he held dear would be swept away from him. The dear, bright, cheerful Hobbits would grow old and weak. Eomer and Gimli would have their hair turn grey and their eyes clouded. Faramir and Eowyn would pass on and abandon Ithilien to someone he did not know. Arwen Undomiel, Queen of Gondor and Arnor, the Evenstar, would fade. Her light and beauty would diminish in the face of grief, and her fate would be that of a mortal. She shared Luthien's looks as well as her end. And Aragorn, the king Elessar..His best friend. His brother. He would perish once the doom of the race of Men finally caught up with him. And even their children would pass away. Yet Legolas, Elf prince of Eryn Lasgalen, would remain with no comfort unto his despair. This was his bane, brought upon himself in his choice to give his heart to mortals.
He could leave these shores now and sail away into the West, not having to bear witness to any of these passings but instead finding peace in Valinor. But he couldn't. He could not leave the people he loved, not when they still had life left to them. He would not break his promise or his loyalty. Thusly, he was condemned to that loss, which he dreaded before all else.
Now I will tell you what I've done for you -
Legolas did not make a sound as he lay there and contemplated the inevitable. Yet his mind was a blur of memory and imagination. There was Arwen in the golden light of Imladris, laughing with the look of a heavenly being, and there again she was, seated upon her throne as Queen of Gondor. Yet afterward, he saw her clad in black and veils, passing through desolate woods like a shadow, fading into only a myth called Undomiel. Eomer led the Rohirrim as king of Rohan, appearing no less mighty than he was. His great stallion bore him in majesty, until finally he became too weary to mount it. There he lay, the last mound in the hills of Edoras, covered with simbelmyne. Eowyn, shield maiden of Rohan, the White Lady of Ithilien, stood proud in the dawn, the sunlight upon her golden hair. An admirable smile crossed her pale face and her eyes sparkled. Faramir joined her, taking her in his arms as they watched the sun rising. He watched with that gentle smile he often bore, shy and reserved, yet intelligent. Yet both the lord and lady of Ithilien were cast away into graves of stone, side by side for all the ages of the world. The Shire had faded with the Hobbits, and Gimli the Dwarf lay in the last hours of his life clutching his ax to him, his beard now gray. Aragorn shot him a smile on a serene and sunny afternoon, playing with his children. He rode beside the Elf and spoke unto him quietly, or laughed at some old memory. And Elessar, most beloved of Men and kings, remained only a memory preserved in stone, as all of Minas Tirith and Gondor walked their streets clad in black, mourning the irreplaceable king. Legolas shuddered as one, solitary tear slid down his face in what seemed like the span of eternity.
Fifty thousand tears I've cried
The sun had vanished away into the west and dawnless was the day of Elessar's passing. The skies remained dark and overcast, with a sullen wind in the air. It seemed all color had drained away from the world. Undomiel stood alone before her beloved's grave, the light dead in her eyes. Anduril lay clutched to Elessar's chest, and his crown was nestled upon his gray- streaked head. Only the Evenstar was left behind with Legolas. Eowyn, Faramir, Eomer, Gimli, the Hobbits, all were silent. Laments haunted the air in Minas Tirith and Ithilien, Elves and mortals alike expressing their sorrow openly. Yet Legolas had no lament to sing for Elessar. The pain in his chest prevented him from speaking or making a sound. His eyes glistened with unshed tears, for no amount of weeping would comfort his soul. The Evenstar turned away from Elessar and wandered away. He never thought she would turn away from her Aragorn. He could not. He would not.
" Legolas? " came Eowyn's voice.
The Elf prince rose from his bed and snapped out of his reverie. Not another tear escaped him, yet his melancholy was clear upon his face, although it did not betray the extent of his grief. He sat upon the edge of the bed with his head bowed. Eowyn floated in quietly, a slight smile upon her face as she neared him from the door.
" I thought perhaps you slept ", she said.
" Nay, milady ", he replied simply.
" The hour grows late. Faramir is tired yet he waits for to come to bed ", she said with a fond smile creeping upon her face. " Are you all right, Legolas? " she queried as she noticed his disposition.
Legolas slowly lifted his head, even then portraying the ethereal beauty of the Elves. His lambent blue eyes met her own, and the smile disappeared from her face. His expression was stoic, yet there was an undeniable presence of sadness about him. He looked up at her for a silent moment, searching her face and remembering her destiny to perish.
" I am fine, milady ", he finally answered. She still eyed him questioningly, clearly seeing that he was troubled. " You should return to Lord Faramir."
Screaming, deceiving, and bleeding and for you
Legolas always called her 'milady' or Lady Eowyn and referred to her husband as 'Lord Faramir', despite their urging to refrain from such formality since they were close friends. Eowyn only gave a slow nod, still fixed on his sad and fair face. She turned away from him and made to leave.
" Good night, Legolas ", she said softly at the door, having turned to peer at him over her shoulder.
" Good night, milady ", he replied quietly. Eowyn stared at him with tentative concern for a short moment, before passing away through the door and into the night.
" Eowyn ", he murmured after he she had gone.
And you still won't hear me.
Legolas slowly lay back down upon his soft cotton sheets and feather pillow. He gazed up at the stars again, listening to the soft rolling of the sea on the shore in his head and the sweet notes of a flute. His eyes met a particularly bright star that hung high in the sky.
" Undomiel ", he uttered. " For how long shall thee shine before fading? "
The star only shone unwavering in reply. He looked at it for another wordless moment, wishing that the glass of the window was not there so that he might feel the night air and have naught but that between himself and the star.
The Elf never took his eyes off that star, and it glimmered in his sight until finally the glaze of sleep came over his brilliant eyes and it blurred before fading.
A/N: This fic is a total Angst Fest. So Much Angst. It'll be dark at times as well. Legolas is OOC and totally depressed. Why I always put my beloved through hell, I don't know, I'm just twisted..This is an Evanescence songfic. It'll feature their lyrics in each, using four songs over the course of the whole fic. If I'm slow in updating, forgive me but I'm working on several other things now, I just love multi tasking. :D No slash,you know the drill.I suppose u could consider this AU. Please review. And don't forget about my other fics, especially Brothers in Heart, if you are a previous reader of mine.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Chapter I.
Legolas lay still upon his feather bed, shades of every green in the sheets that were arranged upon it. His gaze strayed out the window to the quiet dark of Ithilien and the starry indigo skies. Each of them, whether small or big, twinkled at him cheerfully. Their glimmers were reflected in his eyes, which seemed boundless in depth and yet there was an emptiness there now that had not been there before. So many stars there were, he thought. Children of the moon adorning the sky and guiding the lost. There was a time when those stars brought him such joy it was almost unnatural. But now, they seemed such trivial things. They offered him no comfort then, nor had they been able to for some time. Yet he gazed at them still, for whatever reason there was. The sky shimmered with those stars, reminding Legolas of the way the ocean glittered at the touch of sunlight.
Ah, the Sea, he thought. No matter how he tired, he could not help but think of it. Nay, he dwelled upon the thought. Each day, it occupied his mind. He yearned to hear the waves roll up on the shore, to smell the sea air, to hear the gulls crying and feel the sand beneath his feet. He wished to feel the ocean breeze running through his hair, releasing him. He wanted to let himself go down the path that led there.
Nay, you cannot, he reminded himself. For one moment, think of someone other than yourself. You led a band of Elves here to Ithilien, and they do not sail, but stay here in loyalty to their prince. You told Faramir you would rule this colony gladly. You promised Arwen and her children to attend tea with them one day. You cannot betray Gimli. You said that you would go to the Shire in the spring and pay the Gamgees a visit. You vowed to Aragorn that you would stay until he passed out of the circles of the world.
But he wanted it. He had never been so infatuated with anything in his life. And besides his curse of sea longing, there was a foreboding sense of melancholy hovering about him. He often thought of the inevitable loss he would one day have to bear. All he held dear would be swept away from him. The dear, bright, cheerful Hobbits would grow old and weak. Eomer and Gimli would have their hair turn grey and their eyes clouded. Faramir and Eowyn would pass on and abandon Ithilien to someone he did not know. Arwen Undomiel, Queen of Gondor and Arnor, the Evenstar, would fade. Her light and beauty would diminish in the face of grief, and her fate would be that of a mortal. She shared Luthien's looks as well as her end. And Aragorn, the king Elessar..His best friend. His brother. He would perish once the doom of the race of Men finally caught up with him. And even their children would pass away. Yet Legolas, Elf prince of Eryn Lasgalen, would remain with no comfort unto his despair. This was his bane, brought upon himself in his choice to give his heart to mortals.
He could leave these shores now and sail away into the West, not having to bear witness to any of these passings but instead finding peace in Valinor. But he couldn't. He could not leave the people he loved, not when they still had life left to them. He would not break his promise or his loyalty. Thusly, he was condemned to that loss, which he dreaded before all else.
Now I will tell you what I've done for you -
Legolas did not make a sound as he lay there and contemplated the inevitable. Yet his mind was a blur of memory and imagination. There was Arwen in the golden light of Imladris, laughing with the look of a heavenly being, and there again she was, seated upon her throne as Queen of Gondor. Yet afterward, he saw her clad in black and veils, passing through desolate woods like a shadow, fading into only a myth called Undomiel. Eomer led the Rohirrim as king of Rohan, appearing no less mighty than he was. His great stallion bore him in majesty, until finally he became too weary to mount it. There he lay, the last mound in the hills of Edoras, covered with simbelmyne. Eowyn, shield maiden of Rohan, the White Lady of Ithilien, stood proud in the dawn, the sunlight upon her golden hair. An admirable smile crossed her pale face and her eyes sparkled. Faramir joined her, taking her in his arms as they watched the sun rising. He watched with that gentle smile he often bore, shy and reserved, yet intelligent. Yet both the lord and lady of Ithilien were cast away into graves of stone, side by side for all the ages of the world. The Shire had faded with the Hobbits, and Gimli the Dwarf lay in the last hours of his life clutching his ax to him, his beard now gray. Aragorn shot him a smile on a serene and sunny afternoon, playing with his children. He rode beside the Elf and spoke unto him quietly, or laughed at some old memory. And Elessar, most beloved of Men and kings, remained only a memory preserved in stone, as all of Minas Tirith and Gondor walked their streets clad in black, mourning the irreplaceable king. Legolas shuddered as one, solitary tear slid down his face in what seemed like the span of eternity.
Fifty thousand tears I've cried
The sun had vanished away into the west and dawnless was the day of Elessar's passing. The skies remained dark and overcast, with a sullen wind in the air. It seemed all color had drained away from the world. Undomiel stood alone before her beloved's grave, the light dead in her eyes. Anduril lay clutched to Elessar's chest, and his crown was nestled upon his gray- streaked head. Only the Evenstar was left behind with Legolas. Eowyn, Faramir, Eomer, Gimli, the Hobbits, all were silent. Laments haunted the air in Minas Tirith and Ithilien, Elves and mortals alike expressing their sorrow openly. Yet Legolas had no lament to sing for Elessar. The pain in his chest prevented him from speaking or making a sound. His eyes glistened with unshed tears, for no amount of weeping would comfort his soul. The Evenstar turned away from Elessar and wandered away. He never thought she would turn away from her Aragorn. He could not. He would not.
" Legolas? " came Eowyn's voice.
The Elf prince rose from his bed and snapped out of his reverie. Not another tear escaped him, yet his melancholy was clear upon his face, although it did not betray the extent of his grief. He sat upon the edge of the bed with his head bowed. Eowyn floated in quietly, a slight smile upon her face as she neared him from the door.
" I thought perhaps you slept ", she said.
" Nay, milady ", he replied simply.
" The hour grows late. Faramir is tired yet he waits for to come to bed ", she said with a fond smile creeping upon her face. " Are you all right, Legolas? " she queried as she noticed his disposition.
Legolas slowly lifted his head, even then portraying the ethereal beauty of the Elves. His lambent blue eyes met her own, and the smile disappeared from her face. His expression was stoic, yet there was an undeniable presence of sadness about him. He looked up at her for a silent moment, searching her face and remembering her destiny to perish.
" I am fine, milady ", he finally answered. She still eyed him questioningly, clearly seeing that he was troubled. " You should return to Lord Faramir."
Screaming, deceiving, and bleeding and for you
Legolas always called her 'milady' or Lady Eowyn and referred to her husband as 'Lord Faramir', despite their urging to refrain from such formality since they were close friends. Eowyn only gave a slow nod, still fixed on his sad and fair face. She turned away from him and made to leave.
" Good night, Legolas ", she said softly at the door, having turned to peer at him over her shoulder.
" Good night, milady ", he replied quietly. Eowyn stared at him with tentative concern for a short moment, before passing away through the door and into the night.
" Eowyn ", he murmured after he she had gone.
And you still won't hear me.
Legolas slowly lay back down upon his soft cotton sheets and feather pillow. He gazed up at the stars again, listening to the soft rolling of the sea on the shore in his head and the sweet notes of a flute. His eyes met a particularly bright star that hung high in the sky.
" Undomiel ", he uttered. " For how long shall thee shine before fading? "
The star only shone unwavering in reply. He looked at it for another wordless moment, wishing that the glass of the window was not there so that he might feel the night air and have naught but that between himself and the star.
The Elf never took his eyes off that star, and it glimmered in his sight until finally the glaze of sleep came over his brilliant eyes and it blurred before fading.