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ADVENTURES OF A NINE LEGGED SPIDER
by Onkiu!
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Author's Note: Our blue haired goddess continues to take over the limelight! With a very special someone, of course! There's a slight romantic element to, but since the genre is a humourous action/adventure story, this romantic element won't outweigh the others.
Also, I believe that Hisoka is quite rich. Seeing that in the anime he owned a blimp, I'm sure a limousine is nothing to him).
For sailor aidos :) After I upload these last few chapters, there won't be any more! So, sadly, it will end with many loose ends (woo bad pun).
Legal Stuff: I love HxH... but don't own it... boo hoo.
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Onkiu presents:
ADVENTURES OF A NINE LEGGED SPIDER
Chapter Five: Hisoka x Machi x Fame
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"Hello, Machi," said Hisoka, who also had his posterior implanted onto the wet ground, "We meet again."
He said it in that characteristic fruity tone of voice which suggested that meeting old friends in embarrassing situations was quite the norm. Machi decided that her best bet of getting him off her case was to ignore him, and only move after he left, in case he followed her home. When she felt his eyes still boring holes into her forehead after five minutes of the two of them sitting, rain soaked, in the middle of the footpath, with haphazard pedestrians skidding around them and colliding into each other, she gave up.
"What do you want?" she sighed heavily.
"I want to take you out to dinner," said Hisoka, with no trace of embarrassment, "At Serenade's Splendid Resturant," he added, as though the name of this restaurant would be the factor to change her mind.
Machi considered her options. The thought of having a dinner that was not made by one of the Ryodan was very tempting. Phinx, in his sulkiness and depression, had recently taken to cooking in their newly installed kitchen to exercise out all his excess negative energies. He had also taken to asking, which, coming from him, was more in the order of forcing people to taste his creations. And everyone in the Ryodan were all, for once, unanimous in agreement that they neither looked nor tasted like anything fit for human or arachnid consumption.
Here she was, soaking wet and cold; the image of a three course meal of edible material in a comfortable seat at a warm and exclusive restaurant was definitely more pleasing than the image of eating Phinx's postage-stamp-tasting 'meat' in their half-renovated and cold home. I would be stuck with Hisoka though, she thought. But then, in her mind, came the image of Phinx, whom so far no one had managed to talk any sense into.
She analysed her choices. Serenade's – definitely better than home cooking. Hisoka – I can definitely talk a tiny bit more reason into him for now that I can talk into Phinx.
"Okay. I'll come," she said, finally succumbing to what she had always steeled herself against.
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Hisoka was 600th time lucky, and his face showed it. He hummed happily as he strutted back to his limousine, parked around the corner, with Machi walking sulkily behind. She kept a clear distance of three metres between him and her, lest he decided that he suddenly wanted to show her his affections.
At the sight of his master approaching the car, his chauffeur quickly leapt out, black umbrella in one hand. He strided around the front, and once Hisoka was near enough, he whispered, "Did it work, sir?"
"Excellent plan, Smithers." Hisoka whispered back, smirking slightly. "Your idea served me well. Indeed, having me waiting for her, soaking wet, without an umbrella, definitely made me look more pitiable than if I sashayed out of my limousine with a chauffeur in tow, holding up an umbrella to keep my expensive Armani suit and perfect hair dry. I would have believed that she was going out with me out of sympathy, but because I know that she does not possess any of that, I therefore conclude that it is-"
"Love, sir?"
"Well done, Smithers. I never knew you to be so bright."
Smithers beamed at this unexpected praise from his master. He held open the door as Machi approached within hearing range, and ceased their little conversation.
"Good evening, Miss," he said, making a low bow.
Machi ignored him as she stepped into the limousine. For a moment, she felt rather guilty to intrude on the perfection of the interior of the car. For a moment, she did not want to plant her mud soaked bottom onto the cream leather seats, nor drip any water onto the clean carpet of the floor. She even had thoughts of walking back out.
But then, she recalled that the owner of the car was Hisoka, and all her qualms about dirtying the car were instantly obliterated. Taking extra care to make the seats dirtier than they need to be, she slid across until she reached the other side of the car. Hisoka moved in after her, and once Smithers had closed the door on them, they were off again.
They sat in an uncomfortable silence for the first few minutes of the trip. Eventually Hisoka broke it by humming some annoying children's tune, which continued for a few more minutes before Machi felt she was about to snap, and cut him short by saying, "Where are we going?"
Hisoka paused thoughtfully for dramatic effect, and then said slowly, "Well, you really would not enjoy the dinner if you were soaking wet, would you?" With a triumphant smirk on his face, he glanced up and down at her slightly dirty and very wet clothes. Silently furious that he was indeed correct, she paused to think of a comeback. However, in the time she took to think of a comeback, his statement was further reinforced by the fact that the cold was now cutting into her skin. She gave up her quest for a witty comeback and settled for the next best thing.
"What do you mean by that?"
"We are getting a change of clothes."
"If you mean that I have to go to a laundromat, I'm not going."
The thought of having to remove her clothes off to dry while in the presence of Hisoka was simply revolting. Hisoka, frankly, didn't mind showing off his fantastic abs, but preferred not to jeopardise his chance of pulling off a date with her any further.
"Since you don't want to, we will go and get new clothes."