Disclaimer: I own some of the idea, and maybe a few characters, maybe not.
Most of it's from the wonderful JKR who broke my little heart in her recent
book OOTP...I'll never get over that one...J/K I already did
I hope you enjoy this fic. It so far isn't the way I wanted it, but I think it's an okay attempt. Enjoy!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It was a cold rainy night. Water pounded the sidewalks, and made a brilliantly loud patter on the lids of the garbage cans that lined the streets. Sirius Black now sat between two of those garbage cans with a discarded muggle newspaper covering his head. It didn't make a large difference, but every bit counted.
For most kids summer holiday is the best time of the year, even from Hogwarts. For Sirius, however, it was absolutely dreadful. From the first time Sirius Black spoke his first sentence, his family knew he was different. They figured it was something that they could eventually brainwash out of him, but they never could. Sirius was too nice. He would help anything from a dog with a broken leg to a moth with a bent wing.
They finally knew it was too late when Sirius went for his first year at Hogwarts. Much to their utter embarrassment, Sirius had been put in Gryffindor. Ravenclaw would have been acceptable, though slightly disappointing, but Gryffindor was just going to far. The house wasn't the half of it, however. When Sirius came home after his first summer he spoke of nothing more than how wonderful his new friends were. When they asked who, he told them primarily of one James Potter. The Black family once had close ties with the Potters, until the generation came when the main stream of Potter's began marrying muggles and half- bloods. To the Blacks this was simply unacceptable.
Every day that they saw Sirius they tried to make him change, and when they saw that it failed they complained about what a disappointment he was. Their dream was to have produced a son who was an absolute clone of there first, Regulus.
Regulus had been put in Slytherin. He socialized with only the purest of blood and believed in the abolition of any witches and wizards with less than three quarters of magical blood.
Sirius, however, couldn't understand how he was better than anyone just because his blood was purer than anyone else. His close friend Remus was a half-blood and was better than he in every subject with the exception of Care of Magical Creatures. For some reason that had always been his strong point. This was probably due to his overly caring nature that his parents despised so much.
He had gotten used to hearing such things about his differences, and he really couldn't care less. He was happy with his outlook on life, and his friends. What he wasn't happy with was his family life, and for this reason he hated summer. That summer in particular was his low point.
It had started like all the rest. He was routinely bantered by Regulus, his cousins, and his friends. His parents routinely told him what a failure he was, and for the most part he wasn't bothered by it. But this summer, they added something new.
This summer, they gave up trying to change him, and simply decided to pretend he didn't exist. Sirius was no longer called to meals. Rather he had to just show up or they'd eat with out him and purposely leave no left- overs. They never included him for family outings, whether it were to some wizarding attraction or to Diagon Alley. When he was in the room they'd keep him out of the conversation and act like there was no one in the seat he occupied.
Sirius was having a harder time dealing with this than he had with the harassment he usually got. At least when his parents spent time telling him what a failure he was they treated him like a person. Now it was hard to tell if he really still existed. He truly felt like he had become an invisible person.
That alone wasn't what caused him to be sitting out in the rain that night. It so happened that that dreadful summer day had been his birthday. He woke that morning to a flock of birds in his room, all bearing brightly wrapped boxes and long messages from his closest friends. He got his usual load of candy and prank supplies but this year got something special as well. From James and Remus he received a photograph of the four Marauders. It was taken after a critical moment in their lives. A moment that stretched the boundaries of their tight friendship. It was taken just after Sirius's three best friends forgave him for making the biggest mistake of his life thus far: Telling Severus Snape how to get inside the Whomping Willow. Never in his life had Sirius felt so bad for any action as he did that night. It wasn't because he had almost caused the death of Snape, but because he almost made his best friend a murderer, and put his other in a life threatening position. That night could have meant the downfall for many people, and it would have been all on his shoulders.
Sirius sat on his bed looking at that picture when the door to his room swung open. He looked up shocked and saw his brother standing in the doorway. "Happy Birthday, dear little brother. What have you got there? Gifts from your Hell-bred friends?"
"You're the only Hell-bread person I know Reg," Sirius said wisely.
Regulus glared. "I just thought I'd tell you that that's about all you'll be getting."
"I expected nothing more, would you like to leave now or do I need to punch you in the face?"
"You...punch me?" Regulus laughed pompously. Sirius scrambled to his feet, still holding the picture he had received and said, "What? You don't think I have the motivation?"
Regulus almost looked scared, but changed the subject before anything like that could happen. "What's this?" he asked snatching up the photo of the smiling boys, alternating giving each other bunny ears. "A picture of you and your trashy friends. You know you should really be ashamed of yourself. After all, we're all ashamed of you." "Does it look like I care?" Sirius asked and made to grab the picture back. Regulus quickly moved it away. "I don't think you should have this little brother, it'll only slow down mother and father's plan even more."
"What?"
"What?" He mocked.
"Give me that!"
"I'm sorry Sirius," he said with mock sincerity. "But I think it's going to burn, just like you will one of these days....unless you follow the plan."
"What's this plan?"
"Where's the one place you wish you were right this second?"
"Hogwarts," Sirius said without a second thought.
"Where's the one place you'll never go again? Hint: it's the same answer as before," he said like a game show host, wearing a sadistic smile.
Sirius looked at him piercingly and again reached for the photo. He didn't really know what his brother was talking about, nor did he want to find out.
"Take one more look at your friends, little brother, because you're never seeing them again," he said gleefully and then turned with the picture and drew out his wand. Moments later the photo was on the floor shriveling with the flames.
"I will be seeing them again," Sirius stated firmly, clenching his teeth. He then walked forward and slammed his fist against his brothers nose. He would have drawn his wand as well, but unlike his brother, he hadn't yet come of age.
Regulus was leaning against the wall, holding his nose. Sirius hurriedly pushed him out the door and slammed it shut, locking it and blocking it with his bureau. He knew his brother could still get in if he wanted to, but he also knew that his brother was a very big wimp at heart. He always went with what he thought would be easiest.
Sirius went and sat back on his bed and contemplated what his brother had said. Apparently his family was planning on stopping him from going back to Hogwarts, but why? Having him home year round would only add to their problems not help them. Unless they had some plan for him. Sirius wouldn't put it past his parents to turn him into a human house elf if he ever did anything TOO unacceptable. But he hadn't done anything out of the ordinary.
A sick feeling came over Sirius as he thought of the possibilities that the near future could now hold, and none of them looked bright. So Sirius did the only thing he could think of. He packed up all the things he'd need in a small backpack and crawled out the window, planning to never return to the house at Number 12 Grimmauld Place.
He walked the streets of London until night fell. At that point he just decided to stop walking as he was already as wet as can be and had no real destination in mind. So he found himself settled between two very raunchy garbage cans with a soggy newspaper atop his head. It was all Sirius could do not to cry, something he hadn't done since he was eight or nine. He was cold, lonely, and didn't know where to go.
He knew that he would be welcomed at any of his friends homes with open arms, but he didn't want to be a burden to anyone. Thus Sirius decided that, for at least the evening he'd live life on the streets.
Between those two garbage cans he slept until the early rays of sunshine dried up the last traces of rain. He slept as cars began to drive by more frequently. He was finally awoken when a garbage man came by and started making a racket emptying the smelly cans into his truck.
Before driving off the man took one look at Sirius and said, "Go home, kid. It's not worth it."
Sirius watched him drive off down the street and thought to himself, "It is worth it. Anything is worth getting out of there...especially if they're not going to let me go back." He then picked himself up off the street and continued on down the road. All day he walked, taking frequent breaks at parks and buying hotdogs from the vendors there. He knew, however, that he couldn't do it forever. He was already running low on money. His plan, was just to do what he could and worry about what to do after when the time came.
When night fell again, Sirius decided to stay in a park. He found a bench that was rather secluded from the other homeless people and lay down. This night it was clear and warm, but Sirius was just as miserable as he had been the night before. Again he had to fight the urge to cry. His life was miserable, but never had it been as miserable as it was now.
To make matters worse, he couldn't fall asleep that night. He kept hearing sounds that absolutely terrified him and he felt he had to stay completely alert, to be sure no one attacked him. Eventually, however, near one o'clock in the morning, he managed to drift off to sleep.
An hour or so later he was woken by something pushing against his arm. He shot up on the bench and took a defensive stance, looking around wildly. He sighed in relief as he saw who it was. "James."
"Sirius...what the Hell are you doing? Your uncle told me you ran away, I've been really worried."
Sirius didn't say a word, but again felt the urge to break down in tears. "I'm sorry," he whispered.
"What's going on? Why are you sleeping on a park bench?" "Bad summer," Sirius mumbled, leaning back against the bench. James sat next to him.
"Tell me about it," James said, leaning back as well.
Sirius sighed, "First, my family ignored me completely. They didn't see to it that I ate, slept, how I felt...they didn't care at all. Then, yesterday--"
"You're birthday?"
Sirius nodded, "Regulus comes into my room, and for the first time the whole summer, starts talking to me. He burnt the picture that you and Remus gave me and said that I wasn't going back to Hogwarts ever again."
"They couldn't do that."
"James...you know my family. They COULD do that."
"Maybe but why?"
Sirius shrugged. "Just to make me miserable I suppose."
"So you just ran away?" Sirius nodded sadly.
"You could have come to my place."
"I know," Sirius muttered.
"Why didn't you? Why didn't you tell me?"
"I didn't want to put you and your family out. I thought I should take care of this one myself."
"And look where that got you...sleeping on a park bench."
"Do you think I'm happy with this?" Sirius snapped.
"Of course not, but you know damn well that we wouldn't be put out by having you stay. My parents have told you every summer since we've met that you were more than welcome to spend your summers at our house. You KNOW that."
Sirius just looked down.
"C'mon man," James said standing up.
Sirius took a deep breath and looked up at James. He stared for a while and then shook his head.
"God, why do you have to be so stubborn?!" He yelled. Then he noticed the filmy look Sirius's eyes were taking on and knew he was about to cry. He knew that it was probably taking every fiber of his being not to completely lose it, so he decided to take another approach.
"Just come to my house and take a shower and get some food, alright. You're starting to smell."
He saw a small smile playing on Sirius's lips and kicked him lightly in the shin.
"Okay," Sirius whispered and stood up.
"Are you okay, Sirius?"
Sirius nodded and together they left the park. James noticed that Sirius kept bringing his hand up to his eyes and wiping them roughly. Sirius was never one to show emotion well.
"How are we getting to your house?" Sirius asked after a while of walking.
"We're going to floo from the Leaky Cauldron. You didn't realize how close you were did you?"
Sirius shook his head. "Do your parent's know you're out here?" James smiled, "You know my parents would never let me wander the streets of London in the middle of the night. I snuck out of course."
"Damn it James!"
"What?" He asked, stopping in his tracks.
"You have the best parents in the world. Why the Hell do you always do stuff to piss them off? Do you realize how lucky you are to have them."
"Yeah, but I'll admit, it's one of those things I can't help but take for granted. And when they realize that I've rescued you from another night of sleeping in a park, they're going to be fine with it. I may get yelled at, but you have to admit, it's worth it."
Sirius just shook his head and wrapped his arms tightly around himself.
The two started walking again. "You don't know how lucky you are, James," Sirius muttered.
James gave him a sympathetic smile, "Yeah I do."
Sirius's lip trembled slightly and he bit it. "It's going to be okay Sirius. You're fine now. You never have to go back to your house. I'll make sure of that." He gave a small nod and again wiped at his eyes. "Lets just go to your house."
"Okay."
As they continued to walk down the street a strong tension grew between them. Sirius's fists were clenched, his knuckles were turning white. Suddenly, without warning he ran up to a trash can and started kicking it with all his might.
"I hate you!" he yelled at the top of his lungs and continued to kick it until it was fully folded in half. "I hate you," he whispered this time crumbling to the ground, tears coming down his face.
James let Sirius have his outburst. He didn't really know what to do once Sirius settled on the hard sidewalk, but he just let his instincts take over.
He walked calmly up to Sirius and squatted in front of him. Sirius tried to avoid eye contact, but James forced him to look at him.
"It's okay to hate them. I think you've earned that. But it's time to move on. Wipe them from your mind....forget about them. They can't do anything to you anymore."
Sirius nodded and wiped his face again.
"C'mon buddy." James grabbed his hand and pulled Sirius to his feet.
Sirius walked on with him. He was still crying mildly, but James tried to ignore it. He knew Sirius would prefer it that way.
When they reached the entrance of the Leaky Cauldron they stopped.
"Are you ready to go inside or do you want to...er...dry your eyes first?"
Sirius rolled his sleeve over his hand and was about to blow his nose on it when James grabbed it. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a clump of tissues and handed them over.
"Thanks," Sirius mumbled and blew his nose and dried his face.
"Anytime my friend. Let's go."
Sirius followed James inside the Leaky Cauldron and they made their way to the fireplace. James pulled out a leather pouch filled with floo powder and held it towards Sirius. He took a pinch and threw it in the fire. "Potter Place," he called as he stepped into the green flames. In moments he was in the comfort of the Potters living room. He dropped his small bag on the floor and headed for the couch. He sat down on it with a sigh and waited for James, who was taking an unusual amount of time to come through the fireplace. He was actually starting to worry when he heard steps coming down the stairs. He soon saw the pink robe and fuzzy slippers of Mrs. Potter. James looked more like her than he looked like his father. She had her face shape and hair color, but got his brown eyes from his father.
"Sirius! What are you doing here?"
"I'm sorry James..."
"Where is James?" she said suspiciously.
"Well he, came and got me, and should be back at any time."
"Sirius, I'm glad you're here, but he shouldn't have done that."
"That's exactly what I told him Mrs. Potter," Sirius said looking down at his feet.
"Are you alright Sirius?"
Sirius shook his head.
She came and sat beside him on the couch. Never in her life had she seen him looking so down. Usually it was all he could do not to try to make someone smile or laugh. Currently it seemed like it was impossible to get him to do either of those things.
"You're a mess, Sirius, what happened?" She asked in a caring tone.
"My parents...and Regulus," Sirius said looking up into her kind face.
"What did they say this time?"
"They didn't say much, until the other day. All summer they didn't say two words to me. It was like I didn't exist."
"What happened the other day?"
"Regulus came into my room, burned the present Remus and James gave me, and told me that my parents weren't going to let me go back to Hogwarts...I don't know why, or how, but they planned to do it. I didn't want to stick around and let that happen...you know?"
"So you came here. I'm glad."
"Actually I spent the night between two garbage cans and then on a park bench. James found me there about an hour ago and forced me to come here."
"Why did he have to force you?"
"I didn't want to impose..."
"Sirius...you know it's not an imposition. We love you."
"You're the only ones," he said sadly and again had to fight back his tears. Mrs. Potter pulled him into a hug and tried to cheer him up, but nothing worked.
She released him after a moment and asked, "Where's James, Sirius?"
"I don't know. He sent me through first and was supposed to follow...he never came."
"That's not like him."
Sirius nodded his agreement.
"I'm going to go check on him. Did you boys leave from the Leaky Cauldron?"
"Yeah," Sirius said and watched her transfiigure her pink bath robe into dress robes and apparate out.
Sirius sighed and shook his head, praying James was okay. If he wasn't Sirius didn't know what he'd do with himself. He couldn't live with himself if he caused James any harm.
~~~~~~~~~~~
What happened to James? If you care then I've done my job I guess...
That chapter was shorter than I wanted it to be, but I'm happy with it. What do you think? It's not exactly the way I wanted it, and I'm not guaranteeing that I'll stick with it. I have another fic idea in my head and if this one doesn't work I plan to follow that one.
Also for those of you who haven't read it, I'm working on another story at the moment called "All for You" it's an AU about Sirius taking Harry. I think it's pretty good and would like everyone out there to read it :) Thanks!
I hope you enjoy this fic. It so far isn't the way I wanted it, but I think it's an okay attempt. Enjoy!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It was a cold rainy night. Water pounded the sidewalks, and made a brilliantly loud patter on the lids of the garbage cans that lined the streets. Sirius Black now sat between two of those garbage cans with a discarded muggle newspaper covering his head. It didn't make a large difference, but every bit counted.
For most kids summer holiday is the best time of the year, even from Hogwarts. For Sirius, however, it was absolutely dreadful. From the first time Sirius Black spoke his first sentence, his family knew he was different. They figured it was something that they could eventually brainwash out of him, but they never could. Sirius was too nice. He would help anything from a dog with a broken leg to a moth with a bent wing.
They finally knew it was too late when Sirius went for his first year at Hogwarts. Much to their utter embarrassment, Sirius had been put in Gryffindor. Ravenclaw would have been acceptable, though slightly disappointing, but Gryffindor was just going to far. The house wasn't the half of it, however. When Sirius came home after his first summer he spoke of nothing more than how wonderful his new friends were. When they asked who, he told them primarily of one James Potter. The Black family once had close ties with the Potters, until the generation came when the main stream of Potter's began marrying muggles and half- bloods. To the Blacks this was simply unacceptable.
Every day that they saw Sirius they tried to make him change, and when they saw that it failed they complained about what a disappointment he was. Their dream was to have produced a son who was an absolute clone of there first, Regulus.
Regulus had been put in Slytherin. He socialized with only the purest of blood and believed in the abolition of any witches and wizards with less than three quarters of magical blood.
Sirius, however, couldn't understand how he was better than anyone just because his blood was purer than anyone else. His close friend Remus was a half-blood and was better than he in every subject with the exception of Care of Magical Creatures. For some reason that had always been his strong point. This was probably due to his overly caring nature that his parents despised so much.
He had gotten used to hearing such things about his differences, and he really couldn't care less. He was happy with his outlook on life, and his friends. What he wasn't happy with was his family life, and for this reason he hated summer. That summer in particular was his low point.
It had started like all the rest. He was routinely bantered by Regulus, his cousins, and his friends. His parents routinely told him what a failure he was, and for the most part he wasn't bothered by it. But this summer, they added something new.
This summer, they gave up trying to change him, and simply decided to pretend he didn't exist. Sirius was no longer called to meals. Rather he had to just show up or they'd eat with out him and purposely leave no left- overs. They never included him for family outings, whether it were to some wizarding attraction or to Diagon Alley. When he was in the room they'd keep him out of the conversation and act like there was no one in the seat he occupied.
Sirius was having a harder time dealing with this than he had with the harassment he usually got. At least when his parents spent time telling him what a failure he was they treated him like a person. Now it was hard to tell if he really still existed. He truly felt like he had become an invisible person.
That alone wasn't what caused him to be sitting out in the rain that night. It so happened that that dreadful summer day had been his birthday. He woke that morning to a flock of birds in his room, all bearing brightly wrapped boxes and long messages from his closest friends. He got his usual load of candy and prank supplies but this year got something special as well. From James and Remus he received a photograph of the four Marauders. It was taken after a critical moment in their lives. A moment that stretched the boundaries of their tight friendship. It was taken just after Sirius's three best friends forgave him for making the biggest mistake of his life thus far: Telling Severus Snape how to get inside the Whomping Willow. Never in his life had Sirius felt so bad for any action as he did that night. It wasn't because he had almost caused the death of Snape, but because he almost made his best friend a murderer, and put his other in a life threatening position. That night could have meant the downfall for many people, and it would have been all on his shoulders.
Sirius sat on his bed looking at that picture when the door to his room swung open. He looked up shocked and saw his brother standing in the doorway. "Happy Birthday, dear little brother. What have you got there? Gifts from your Hell-bred friends?"
"You're the only Hell-bread person I know Reg," Sirius said wisely.
Regulus glared. "I just thought I'd tell you that that's about all you'll be getting."
"I expected nothing more, would you like to leave now or do I need to punch you in the face?"
"You...punch me?" Regulus laughed pompously. Sirius scrambled to his feet, still holding the picture he had received and said, "What? You don't think I have the motivation?"
Regulus almost looked scared, but changed the subject before anything like that could happen. "What's this?" he asked snatching up the photo of the smiling boys, alternating giving each other bunny ears. "A picture of you and your trashy friends. You know you should really be ashamed of yourself. After all, we're all ashamed of you." "Does it look like I care?" Sirius asked and made to grab the picture back. Regulus quickly moved it away. "I don't think you should have this little brother, it'll only slow down mother and father's plan even more."
"What?"
"What?" He mocked.
"Give me that!"
"I'm sorry Sirius," he said with mock sincerity. "But I think it's going to burn, just like you will one of these days....unless you follow the plan."
"What's this plan?"
"Where's the one place you wish you were right this second?"
"Hogwarts," Sirius said without a second thought.
"Where's the one place you'll never go again? Hint: it's the same answer as before," he said like a game show host, wearing a sadistic smile.
Sirius looked at him piercingly and again reached for the photo. He didn't really know what his brother was talking about, nor did he want to find out.
"Take one more look at your friends, little brother, because you're never seeing them again," he said gleefully and then turned with the picture and drew out his wand. Moments later the photo was on the floor shriveling with the flames.
"I will be seeing them again," Sirius stated firmly, clenching his teeth. He then walked forward and slammed his fist against his brothers nose. He would have drawn his wand as well, but unlike his brother, he hadn't yet come of age.
Regulus was leaning against the wall, holding his nose. Sirius hurriedly pushed him out the door and slammed it shut, locking it and blocking it with his bureau. He knew his brother could still get in if he wanted to, but he also knew that his brother was a very big wimp at heart. He always went with what he thought would be easiest.
Sirius went and sat back on his bed and contemplated what his brother had said. Apparently his family was planning on stopping him from going back to Hogwarts, but why? Having him home year round would only add to their problems not help them. Unless they had some plan for him. Sirius wouldn't put it past his parents to turn him into a human house elf if he ever did anything TOO unacceptable. But he hadn't done anything out of the ordinary.
A sick feeling came over Sirius as he thought of the possibilities that the near future could now hold, and none of them looked bright. So Sirius did the only thing he could think of. He packed up all the things he'd need in a small backpack and crawled out the window, planning to never return to the house at Number 12 Grimmauld Place.
He walked the streets of London until night fell. At that point he just decided to stop walking as he was already as wet as can be and had no real destination in mind. So he found himself settled between two very raunchy garbage cans with a soggy newspaper atop his head. It was all Sirius could do not to cry, something he hadn't done since he was eight or nine. He was cold, lonely, and didn't know where to go.
He knew that he would be welcomed at any of his friends homes with open arms, but he didn't want to be a burden to anyone. Thus Sirius decided that, for at least the evening he'd live life on the streets.
Between those two garbage cans he slept until the early rays of sunshine dried up the last traces of rain. He slept as cars began to drive by more frequently. He was finally awoken when a garbage man came by and started making a racket emptying the smelly cans into his truck.
Before driving off the man took one look at Sirius and said, "Go home, kid. It's not worth it."
Sirius watched him drive off down the street and thought to himself, "It is worth it. Anything is worth getting out of there...especially if they're not going to let me go back." He then picked himself up off the street and continued on down the road. All day he walked, taking frequent breaks at parks and buying hotdogs from the vendors there. He knew, however, that he couldn't do it forever. He was already running low on money. His plan, was just to do what he could and worry about what to do after when the time came.
When night fell again, Sirius decided to stay in a park. He found a bench that was rather secluded from the other homeless people and lay down. This night it was clear and warm, but Sirius was just as miserable as he had been the night before. Again he had to fight the urge to cry. His life was miserable, but never had it been as miserable as it was now.
To make matters worse, he couldn't fall asleep that night. He kept hearing sounds that absolutely terrified him and he felt he had to stay completely alert, to be sure no one attacked him. Eventually, however, near one o'clock in the morning, he managed to drift off to sleep.
An hour or so later he was woken by something pushing against his arm. He shot up on the bench and took a defensive stance, looking around wildly. He sighed in relief as he saw who it was. "James."
"Sirius...what the Hell are you doing? Your uncle told me you ran away, I've been really worried."
Sirius didn't say a word, but again felt the urge to break down in tears. "I'm sorry," he whispered.
"What's going on? Why are you sleeping on a park bench?" "Bad summer," Sirius mumbled, leaning back against the bench. James sat next to him.
"Tell me about it," James said, leaning back as well.
Sirius sighed, "First, my family ignored me completely. They didn't see to it that I ate, slept, how I felt...they didn't care at all. Then, yesterday--"
"You're birthday?"
Sirius nodded, "Regulus comes into my room, and for the first time the whole summer, starts talking to me. He burnt the picture that you and Remus gave me and said that I wasn't going back to Hogwarts ever again."
"They couldn't do that."
"James...you know my family. They COULD do that."
"Maybe but why?"
Sirius shrugged. "Just to make me miserable I suppose."
"So you just ran away?" Sirius nodded sadly.
"You could have come to my place."
"I know," Sirius muttered.
"Why didn't you? Why didn't you tell me?"
"I didn't want to put you and your family out. I thought I should take care of this one myself."
"And look where that got you...sleeping on a park bench."
"Do you think I'm happy with this?" Sirius snapped.
"Of course not, but you know damn well that we wouldn't be put out by having you stay. My parents have told you every summer since we've met that you were more than welcome to spend your summers at our house. You KNOW that."
Sirius just looked down.
"C'mon man," James said standing up.
Sirius took a deep breath and looked up at James. He stared for a while and then shook his head.
"God, why do you have to be so stubborn?!" He yelled. Then he noticed the filmy look Sirius's eyes were taking on and knew he was about to cry. He knew that it was probably taking every fiber of his being not to completely lose it, so he decided to take another approach.
"Just come to my house and take a shower and get some food, alright. You're starting to smell."
He saw a small smile playing on Sirius's lips and kicked him lightly in the shin.
"Okay," Sirius whispered and stood up.
"Are you okay, Sirius?"
Sirius nodded and together they left the park. James noticed that Sirius kept bringing his hand up to his eyes and wiping them roughly. Sirius was never one to show emotion well.
"How are we getting to your house?" Sirius asked after a while of walking.
"We're going to floo from the Leaky Cauldron. You didn't realize how close you were did you?"
Sirius shook his head. "Do your parent's know you're out here?" James smiled, "You know my parents would never let me wander the streets of London in the middle of the night. I snuck out of course."
"Damn it James!"
"What?" He asked, stopping in his tracks.
"You have the best parents in the world. Why the Hell do you always do stuff to piss them off? Do you realize how lucky you are to have them."
"Yeah, but I'll admit, it's one of those things I can't help but take for granted. And when they realize that I've rescued you from another night of sleeping in a park, they're going to be fine with it. I may get yelled at, but you have to admit, it's worth it."
Sirius just shook his head and wrapped his arms tightly around himself.
The two started walking again. "You don't know how lucky you are, James," Sirius muttered.
James gave him a sympathetic smile, "Yeah I do."
Sirius's lip trembled slightly and he bit it. "It's going to be okay Sirius. You're fine now. You never have to go back to your house. I'll make sure of that." He gave a small nod and again wiped at his eyes. "Lets just go to your house."
"Okay."
As they continued to walk down the street a strong tension grew between them. Sirius's fists were clenched, his knuckles were turning white. Suddenly, without warning he ran up to a trash can and started kicking it with all his might.
"I hate you!" he yelled at the top of his lungs and continued to kick it until it was fully folded in half. "I hate you," he whispered this time crumbling to the ground, tears coming down his face.
James let Sirius have his outburst. He didn't really know what to do once Sirius settled on the hard sidewalk, but he just let his instincts take over.
He walked calmly up to Sirius and squatted in front of him. Sirius tried to avoid eye contact, but James forced him to look at him.
"It's okay to hate them. I think you've earned that. But it's time to move on. Wipe them from your mind....forget about them. They can't do anything to you anymore."
Sirius nodded and wiped his face again.
"C'mon buddy." James grabbed his hand and pulled Sirius to his feet.
Sirius walked on with him. He was still crying mildly, but James tried to ignore it. He knew Sirius would prefer it that way.
When they reached the entrance of the Leaky Cauldron they stopped.
"Are you ready to go inside or do you want to...er...dry your eyes first?"
Sirius rolled his sleeve over his hand and was about to blow his nose on it when James grabbed it. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a clump of tissues and handed them over.
"Thanks," Sirius mumbled and blew his nose and dried his face.
"Anytime my friend. Let's go."
Sirius followed James inside the Leaky Cauldron and they made their way to the fireplace. James pulled out a leather pouch filled with floo powder and held it towards Sirius. He took a pinch and threw it in the fire. "Potter Place," he called as he stepped into the green flames. In moments he was in the comfort of the Potters living room. He dropped his small bag on the floor and headed for the couch. He sat down on it with a sigh and waited for James, who was taking an unusual amount of time to come through the fireplace. He was actually starting to worry when he heard steps coming down the stairs. He soon saw the pink robe and fuzzy slippers of Mrs. Potter. James looked more like her than he looked like his father. She had her face shape and hair color, but got his brown eyes from his father.
"Sirius! What are you doing here?"
"I'm sorry James..."
"Where is James?" she said suspiciously.
"Well he, came and got me, and should be back at any time."
"Sirius, I'm glad you're here, but he shouldn't have done that."
"That's exactly what I told him Mrs. Potter," Sirius said looking down at his feet.
"Are you alright Sirius?"
Sirius shook his head.
She came and sat beside him on the couch. Never in her life had she seen him looking so down. Usually it was all he could do not to try to make someone smile or laugh. Currently it seemed like it was impossible to get him to do either of those things.
"You're a mess, Sirius, what happened?" She asked in a caring tone.
"My parents...and Regulus," Sirius said looking up into her kind face.
"What did they say this time?"
"They didn't say much, until the other day. All summer they didn't say two words to me. It was like I didn't exist."
"What happened the other day?"
"Regulus came into my room, burned the present Remus and James gave me, and told me that my parents weren't going to let me go back to Hogwarts...I don't know why, or how, but they planned to do it. I didn't want to stick around and let that happen...you know?"
"So you came here. I'm glad."
"Actually I spent the night between two garbage cans and then on a park bench. James found me there about an hour ago and forced me to come here."
"Why did he have to force you?"
"I didn't want to impose..."
"Sirius...you know it's not an imposition. We love you."
"You're the only ones," he said sadly and again had to fight back his tears. Mrs. Potter pulled him into a hug and tried to cheer him up, but nothing worked.
She released him after a moment and asked, "Where's James, Sirius?"
"I don't know. He sent me through first and was supposed to follow...he never came."
"That's not like him."
Sirius nodded his agreement.
"I'm going to go check on him. Did you boys leave from the Leaky Cauldron?"
"Yeah," Sirius said and watched her transfiigure her pink bath robe into dress robes and apparate out.
Sirius sighed and shook his head, praying James was okay. If he wasn't Sirius didn't know what he'd do with himself. He couldn't live with himself if he caused James any harm.
~~~~~~~~~~~
What happened to James? If you care then I've done my job I guess...
That chapter was shorter than I wanted it to be, but I'm happy with it. What do you think? It's not exactly the way I wanted it, and I'm not guaranteeing that I'll stick with it. I have another fic idea in my head and if this one doesn't work I plan to follow that one.
Also for those of you who haven't read it, I'm working on another story at the moment called "All for You" it's an AU about Sirius taking Harry. I think it's pretty good and would like everyone out there to read it :) Thanks!