Cast Part 1:
Alex Arieh: age 30
Meri Irhanah: age 24
Appearances by:
Obi-Wan Kenobi: 23
That Which Is Remembered
Darkness shrouded the room where Meri Irhanah stood; one of the vacant meditation rooms in the Temple. Her normally graceful and poised posture was more careworn than usual, yet relaxed in a way that suggested she knew she was alone and had to keep up no pretense for others. Long ago she had learned that the easiest way to handle questions was to have them not asked at all and any visible weakness brought on such questions. Her brow was drawn in a contemplative expression as her fingers restlessly fingered the long padawan braid that hung over her shoulder.
Her dark eyes gazed unseeing out at the busy view of Coruscant, where ships made patterns across the skyline as they followed the different sky lanes. No one seeing her from the outside would have guess at the sudden upheaval of emotions within the young woman. Nor would they have understood why.
Only a few hours before, Meri had learned that she had attained the goal of her life. The goal that she had been constantly working for the past twenty odd years of her life was finally accomplished. She had passed her trials and yet…she was not happy. If anything her soul was being sucked down in a swirling vortex of grief and despair at the realization of what achieving this goal meant.
She almost didn't understand it herself. She had thought that long ago she had reconciled herself to the realization that Alex Arieh was not going to regain what he had lost, most importantly, his memory of her and their past together. Yet the prospect of relinquishing the small bond they still held as master and apprentice shot tendrils of fear and pain through her heart.
At that thought she stopped and questioned herself. In truth it wasn't the breaking of the training bond she feared. That was so insubstantial that it caused no passing concern. However there was another bond…another…something. She had never quite pinned it down. The thing she cherished most was that it held the sense of her Alex, the old Alex. This particular tether between the two was inactive, with Alex's end disappearing behind the blank wall that was his memory loss, yet still Meri treasured the connection. On days she felt the most alone she could lightly touch it and feel the faintest echo of the Alex she had long ago fallen in love with.
Hope…
She thought all hope had died long ago, but she had been deceiving herself. She had hoped. In order to survive she had held onto the last tiny grain of hope that Alex would someday wake up and remember her…remember what they had once shared.
But he hasn't… and he won't Meri…why do you torment yourself even hanging on to the prospect?
She had no answers for the question. In the last five years she'd thrown herself and her very soul into one focus, that of becoming a Jedi knight. Now with that attained she should be happy. She was free of facing the person who, inwardly and without ever suspecting, caused her unbearable grief.
Why then was she so sad?
"Meri?"
The voice cut through the chaotic thoughts of the wounded young woman and immediately her posture melted into the front of a poised Jedi even as she turned to face the familiar voice.
"Why do you do that?" Obi-Wan asked sadly as he stepped out of the shadows. "Do you think I don't see?"
Meri carefully kept her expression neutral as her long time friend Obi-Wan Kenobi stepped closer. "And what do you see, Obi-Wan?" she asked allowing only a hint of emotion to show. Without waiting for his answer she turned back to the floor length windows, her gaze fixed outward.
She could feel his eyes studying her and she flinched visibly when he touched her cheek softly with the back of his fingers.
"I see someone who never grieved for a loved one. And it's eating them inside."
Meri drew in a shuddering breath and clenched her eyes shut tight. "Not now, Obi-Wan. Please, not now."
Obi-Wan allowed his hand to drop back to his side. "You should be happy, Meri. This is a day that should be celebrated."
She turned to look at him, plastering on a fake smile she had learned to perfect in the past years. "I am happy."
Hazel eyes studied her face for long moments. He tilted his head, before shaking it sadly. "No, you're not. You're dying inside, yet you refuse to see it…or admit it."
Dying…?
The word danced through her mind and Meri couldn't deny the appeal it seemed to have. Without giving herself time to analyze that train of thought, she focused her attention back on the young man standing before her who saw too much.
She gave a light, false laugh before shaking her head. "A bit melodramatic don't you think?"
Obi-Wan released a sigh that conceded she was not going to talk about her past or any other element of it. After all, she never had and that, above everything else worried him.
"You are happy then? To be knighted?"
"Of course," the lie rolled of her tongue with practiced ease. "It's what I've been working towards my whole life."
"Are you excited? I heard the ceremony is to be tomorrow evening."
"Yes. I'll be glad to put it behind me," she added quietly, her tone inflections faltering ever so slightly over the words. "You'll be there?" She recovered herself quickly enough to ask him.
"I wouldn't miss it, Mer," he said softly, a hint of distress still lingering in his tone. "Not for anything."