Major Blink
By Funkiechick
(Here's my Blink fic for Blink week! I had to search hard for my Blink!Muse, but eventually I found it while I was eating sushi. Weird, huh? Sushi has nothing to do with this fic though...I gotta hand it to sushi, though. Fish is definitely brain food. I guess raw fish counts also. Anyhoo, enjoy.)
I'm a genius.
I am a Holy, sexy, godamned genius.
Don't believe me? You should. You goddamned should. I have created a masterpiece. A complete and utter masterpiece, and no one else can even compare to the wonderful glory that is me.
Listen to this! Even my vocabulary is getting better with my intelligence.
Ask David. He called me abhorrent. I don't know what that is, but I'm pretty sure that means I'm a genius. Not that I need him to tell me so.
"See Mushee?" I show my GENIUS INVENTION to my best friend. "See, I told you I was brilliant."
Mush likes it, I can tell. He's got this real funny look on his face and he keeps opening his mouth and closing it due to shock. That means he's impressed.
"Uh..." Mush says. "Gee, Blink, dat's...dat's...real great."
"I know!"
Then Mush leaves. Quickly. He must be off to tell everyone about my genius invention. I hope David gets here soon so I can show him. Then he'll tell me more about what a genius I am.
"Blink, what da hell is dat?"
Stupid Racetrack. "It's my invention."
"...but what IS it?"
"Wouldn't ya like ta know?"
"Now dat I look at it, not really. Ya look nuts."
Stupid Racetrack. "Dey all call geniuses nuts, but we aint! We're-"
"Geniuses. Yeah, I heard ya."
Did I mention how stupid Racetrack is? All da guy ever does is gamble, HE'S not a genius. And where'd he get dat hickey from?
"Hey guys, look at dis idiotic invention of Blinks! He thinks he's a GENIUS. HAH."
Stupid Racetrack and his stupid hickey and...wait a second...
"Hey Race, din't SPOT leave real early dis mornin'?"
Silence.
"I like yer invention, Blink, it's great."
That's what I THOUGHT.
That'll teach ya ta make fun of my genius. You only get hurt, stupid, only get hurt.
"I'll soak ya later, ya bum."
Fine Race. Whisper in my ear, real intimidating Mr. I'm-a-quarter-of-your-size. Heh heh heh...
Now, if I just place my GENIUS invention at this angle, and maybe move that part over here...perfect. Now I'm even MORE of a genius. Ah, it looks brilliant, absolutely brilliant.
"So." Oh, look what little Italian is doing now, acting all friendly. "What's it s'posed ta do?"
"You'll see. I's gonna show it ta Dave." Mush sits down with us, and I grin. He'll be so impressed once Dave says they was all being godamned morons and I really am a genius! He DID call me abhorrent while I was workin' on it after all. And as I said-of course that means I'm brilliant.
"So..." Mush scratched his head. "Ya gonna tell us all what it s'posed ta do when Dave gets here? Why?"
"Because." They rollin' their eyes? PFFT. _Jealous_. "He's more experienced wid' schoolar stuff."
Race raises an eyebrow. "Schoolar?"
What? What'd I say? "Yeah."
"Blink, my good pal, ya so stupid it amazes even me."
Mush is understanding me, though. Of course he is, he's my best friend. Not like that stupid short Italian who gets hickeys from Spot. He's worthless. "Did yous say somethin' hickey boy?"
"SHUT UP."
"Woah, I can't believe I din't notice dat-" Good ol' Mush, leaning forward and embarrassing that stupid Race. "Dat's HUGE."
"What can I say? I'm a helluva lot more attractive dan you bums, now get away from me."
"Where'd ya get it?" Mush's eyes are shining now. Somehow he manages ta get outta being a pervert because he's so perfect lookin'.
"Wouldn' you like ta know."
"I know where he got it!" Of course I do, and it's one way to get Race off my back about my genius invention. "Did you-"
WHAM!!!
GEEZUS.
He didn't have to PUNCH me.
And now he's stalkin' off. It's amazing, people say that Race can hold things in, but I think Spot is a bad influence on his temper. For such a little guy he packs a strong punch. Don't tell no one I told you, though.
"Yous gonna have a nice shiner in da mornin'." Mush told me.
Thanks a lot. Like I didn't know that already. Ordinarily I'd chase after Race, but then I'd be leaving my sweet baby alone.
Not Mush. The invention.
"I want Dave ta get here." Mush says, staring at the invention. "I wanna know what dis is..." I grin. Of course you do.
"I'm amazin'."
"Well, it's kinda-"
"Beautiful?"
"Well-"
"Amazin'?"
"I don't-"
"Abhorrent?"
"Huh?"
Specs's attention was caught and now he's staring at me. "Did ya just say abhorrent?"
Yeah. So? "Yeah. So?"
"Do ya know what dat means, Blink?"
"Well, Dave said I was actin' abhorrent when I was makin' my GENIUS invention here. So it means I'm a genius, 'course."
Specs is laughing at me.
Who cares about him anyway.
"Hey everybody!!"
My head shoots up. David! Perfect, now I can show my only true supporter (besides my Mush) my genius invention! "Look, Dave, it's done!"
David kind of looks surprised. Don't blame him. I mean, I'm smarter than him now. Poor guy. Maybe I should stop making fun of him all the time. What with me being so manly and him trying so hard to follow in my genius footsteps.
Don't worry all, there's plenty of Blink for everybody.
David is staring at the invention that is the brilliantness of me. "What the hell?" He asks.
I knew he'd be amazed. "Isn't it great?"
"What IS it?"
"I call it..." This is the moment I've been waiting for. "A ROCKETSHIP."
Everyone is staring at me now. Mush looks real nice, he's grinning and all that. Good ol Mush.
Race and Jack are laughing really loud.
Bastards.
"A _what_?" David says.
What, ya didn't hear me?
"A rocketship."
"A rocketship?"
"Yeah."
"...what is a 'rocketship'?"
I don't see what's so goddamn funny. "Someday people are gonna use it and fly ta da moon."
Now everyone is roaring.
What the fuck is so goddamn funny!!??
"WHAT!!??" I yell, and Mush grabs my arm.
"Uh, Blink, maybe ya should just drop dis..."
"No!"
David wipes the tears from his eyes from laughing. God, what an ass. And here I thought he was smart. "Fly to the MOON?"
"Yeah."
"And by moon he means mental house." DAMN SHORT ITALIANS. Never know when to shut up...
"Shut up Race!" I growl.
"Who da hell is gonna use a 'rocketship'? It doesn't make no sense, dat's what. You's talkin' crap."
"Did I ASK ya, Anthony Hickey?"
"Woah, I can't believe I din't notice dat-" Jack looks at close at Race's neck "Dat's HUGE."
Race is swearing under his breath now. I win, he loses. "Anyway, as I was sayin'." I continue. "Dis is a rocketship. Well, a model a' one. I made it outta spare newspapers and some beat up shoes I found in a puddle. One day people is gonna fly away on it."
No one is laughing now.
They's all kinda staring.
They must be in AWE.
"Blink..." Mush is putting his arm around me. Uh oh. That always means something bad is about to happen. "Blink, I think ya's had some weird dreams or somethin'..."
"No offense, Blink, but..." David shrugs. "A rocketship?"
Mush looks like he feels sorry for me. And Mush wouldn't look like that unless he really meant it...this can't mean...
I look at my invention, and now that everyone's been laughing at it, it don't seem so great no more...
Fuck.
Now it just looks stupid.
"But..." I try to come up with something to redeem my genius. "But..."
"Nice try, Blink." David pats my back. "But come on..."
Oh well.
It was nice feeling like a genius while it lasted.
"Oh well." I shrug. "Guess I'll leave da smart stuff ta you, Davey."
"Alright Blink."
So we leave the previous genius invention behind as we all decide to go to Tibby's. Race says he's gonna go get Spot to come and then started yelling at me when I mentioned something about more hickeys.
Having fun with the boys is more me style, I guess. I mean, come ON. A Rocketship?
Never happen.
END
(I don't know how I thought of this, but I just thought it'd be so great if Blink was secretly some sort of scientific genius and no one knows it, including him. Anyhow, hope you liked it. Oh, and if you don't know what abhorrent means, look it up. But you're all smart, so I'm sure you know.)
(Here's my Blink fic for Blink week! I had to search hard for my Blink!Muse, but eventually I found it while I was eating sushi. Weird, huh? Sushi has nothing to do with this fic though...I gotta hand it to sushi, though. Fish is definitely brain food. I guess raw fish counts also. Anyhoo, enjoy.)
I'm a genius.
I am a Holy, sexy, godamned genius.
Don't believe me? You should. You goddamned should. I have created a masterpiece. A complete and utter masterpiece, and no one else can even compare to the wonderful glory that is me.
Listen to this! Even my vocabulary is getting better with my intelligence.
Ask David. He called me abhorrent. I don't know what that is, but I'm pretty sure that means I'm a genius. Not that I need him to tell me so.
"See Mushee?" I show my GENIUS INVENTION to my best friend. "See, I told you I was brilliant."
Mush likes it, I can tell. He's got this real funny look on his face and he keeps opening his mouth and closing it due to shock. That means he's impressed.
"Uh..." Mush says. "Gee, Blink, dat's...dat's...real great."
"I know!"
Then Mush leaves. Quickly. He must be off to tell everyone about my genius invention. I hope David gets here soon so I can show him. Then he'll tell me more about what a genius I am.
"Blink, what da hell is dat?"
Stupid Racetrack. "It's my invention."
"...but what IS it?"
"Wouldn't ya like ta know?"
"Now dat I look at it, not really. Ya look nuts."
Stupid Racetrack. "Dey all call geniuses nuts, but we aint! We're-"
"Geniuses. Yeah, I heard ya."
Did I mention how stupid Racetrack is? All da guy ever does is gamble, HE'S not a genius. And where'd he get dat hickey from?
"Hey guys, look at dis idiotic invention of Blinks! He thinks he's a GENIUS. HAH."
Stupid Racetrack and his stupid hickey and...wait a second...
"Hey Race, din't SPOT leave real early dis mornin'?"
Silence.
"I like yer invention, Blink, it's great."
That's what I THOUGHT.
That'll teach ya ta make fun of my genius. You only get hurt, stupid, only get hurt.
"I'll soak ya later, ya bum."
Fine Race. Whisper in my ear, real intimidating Mr. I'm-a-quarter-of-your-size. Heh heh heh...
Now, if I just place my GENIUS invention at this angle, and maybe move that part over here...perfect. Now I'm even MORE of a genius. Ah, it looks brilliant, absolutely brilliant.
"So." Oh, look what little Italian is doing now, acting all friendly. "What's it s'posed ta do?"
"You'll see. I's gonna show it ta Dave." Mush sits down with us, and I grin. He'll be so impressed once Dave says they was all being godamned morons and I really am a genius! He DID call me abhorrent while I was workin' on it after all. And as I said-of course that means I'm brilliant.
"So..." Mush scratched his head. "Ya gonna tell us all what it s'posed ta do when Dave gets here? Why?"
"Because." They rollin' their eyes? PFFT. _Jealous_. "He's more experienced wid' schoolar stuff."
Race raises an eyebrow. "Schoolar?"
What? What'd I say? "Yeah."
"Blink, my good pal, ya so stupid it amazes even me."
Mush is understanding me, though. Of course he is, he's my best friend. Not like that stupid short Italian who gets hickeys from Spot. He's worthless. "Did yous say somethin' hickey boy?"
"SHUT UP."
"Woah, I can't believe I din't notice dat-" Good ol' Mush, leaning forward and embarrassing that stupid Race. "Dat's HUGE."
"What can I say? I'm a helluva lot more attractive dan you bums, now get away from me."
"Where'd ya get it?" Mush's eyes are shining now. Somehow he manages ta get outta being a pervert because he's so perfect lookin'.
"Wouldn' you like ta know."
"I know where he got it!" Of course I do, and it's one way to get Race off my back about my genius invention. "Did you-"
WHAM!!!
GEEZUS.
He didn't have to PUNCH me.
And now he's stalkin' off. It's amazing, people say that Race can hold things in, but I think Spot is a bad influence on his temper. For such a little guy he packs a strong punch. Don't tell no one I told you, though.
"Yous gonna have a nice shiner in da mornin'." Mush told me.
Thanks a lot. Like I didn't know that already. Ordinarily I'd chase after Race, but then I'd be leaving my sweet baby alone.
Not Mush. The invention.
"I want Dave ta get here." Mush says, staring at the invention. "I wanna know what dis is..." I grin. Of course you do.
"I'm amazin'."
"Well, it's kinda-"
"Beautiful?"
"Well-"
"Amazin'?"
"I don't-"
"Abhorrent?"
"Huh?"
Specs's attention was caught and now he's staring at me. "Did ya just say abhorrent?"
Yeah. So? "Yeah. So?"
"Do ya know what dat means, Blink?"
"Well, Dave said I was actin' abhorrent when I was makin' my GENIUS invention here. So it means I'm a genius, 'course."
Specs is laughing at me.
Who cares about him anyway.
"Hey everybody!!"
My head shoots up. David! Perfect, now I can show my only true supporter (besides my Mush) my genius invention! "Look, Dave, it's done!"
David kind of looks surprised. Don't blame him. I mean, I'm smarter than him now. Poor guy. Maybe I should stop making fun of him all the time. What with me being so manly and him trying so hard to follow in my genius footsteps.
Don't worry all, there's plenty of Blink for everybody.
David is staring at the invention that is the brilliantness of me. "What the hell?" He asks.
I knew he'd be amazed. "Isn't it great?"
"What IS it?"
"I call it..." This is the moment I've been waiting for. "A ROCKETSHIP."
Everyone is staring at me now. Mush looks real nice, he's grinning and all that. Good ol Mush.
Race and Jack are laughing really loud.
Bastards.
"A _what_?" David says.
What, ya didn't hear me?
"A rocketship."
"A rocketship?"
"Yeah."
"...what is a 'rocketship'?"
I don't see what's so goddamn funny. "Someday people are gonna use it and fly ta da moon."
Now everyone is roaring.
What the fuck is so goddamn funny!!??
"WHAT!!??" I yell, and Mush grabs my arm.
"Uh, Blink, maybe ya should just drop dis..."
"No!"
David wipes the tears from his eyes from laughing. God, what an ass. And here I thought he was smart. "Fly to the MOON?"
"Yeah."
"And by moon he means mental house." DAMN SHORT ITALIANS. Never know when to shut up...
"Shut up Race!" I growl.
"Who da hell is gonna use a 'rocketship'? It doesn't make no sense, dat's what. You's talkin' crap."
"Did I ASK ya, Anthony Hickey?"
"Woah, I can't believe I din't notice dat-" Jack looks at close at Race's neck "Dat's HUGE."
Race is swearing under his breath now. I win, he loses. "Anyway, as I was sayin'." I continue. "Dis is a rocketship. Well, a model a' one. I made it outta spare newspapers and some beat up shoes I found in a puddle. One day people is gonna fly away on it."
No one is laughing now.
They's all kinda staring.
They must be in AWE.
"Blink..." Mush is putting his arm around me. Uh oh. That always means something bad is about to happen. "Blink, I think ya's had some weird dreams or somethin'..."
"No offense, Blink, but..." David shrugs. "A rocketship?"
Mush looks like he feels sorry for me. And Mush wouldn't look like that unless he really meant it...this can't mean...
I look at my invention, and now that everyone's been laughing at it, it don't seem so great no more...
Fuck.
Now it just looks stupid.
"But..." I try to come up with something to redeem my genius. "But..."
"Nice try, Blink." David pats my back. "But come on..."
Oh well.
It was nice feeling like a genius while it lasted.
"Oh well." I shrug. "Guess I'll leave da smart stuff ta you, Davey."
"Alright Blink."
So we leave the previous genius invention behind as we all decide to go to Tibby's. Race says he's gonna go get Spot to come and then started yelling at me when I mentioned something about more hickeys.
Having fun with the boys is more me style, I guess. I mean, come ON. A Rocketship?
Never happen.
END
(I don't know how I thought of this, but I just thought it'd be so great if Blink was secretly some sort of scientific genius and no one knows it, including him. Anyhow, hope you liked it. Oh, and if you don't know what abhorrent means, look it up. But you're all smart, so I'm sure you know.)