(A/N: Hey everyone, it's me again. I'm back!! Anyway, I had this little fic sitting in my computer and I figured I could post it. Just to say, to any guys who are reading this, I don't think that all guys are bad. I have a younger brother and he exhibits many of these qualities; in fact, he's the reason I wrote this.

This is a song fic to the Tracey Byrd song "The Truth About Men". It's a country song that came out a few months ago, and I love it to death. It epitomizes exactly what most women already think. It's quite funny also. This chapter is a little background information. The rest will begin with a stanza from the song. Anyway, no more blabbing on my part. On with the story.)

Disclaimer - I do not own the Harry Potter characters mentioned in this story. Nor do I own the rights to Tracey Byrd's song "The Truth About Men". I just thought the two would go cute together. No money is being made from either one. Yah, yah, yah, You get the point already.

They're All the Same

Hermione Ann Granger-Malfoy was sitting at her dining room table sipping a cup of hot tea when a frantic looking house-elf appeared in front of her.

"Mist....mistress..." the little creature quivered, "there are people at the door who are requesting to see miss." Hermione looked up from her cup and frowned. She and Draco were not expecting any visitors. 'Wait a moment.' she thought, 'today is the match between Puddlemere United and the Chudley Canons. I forgot, Draco and the boys are watching the game here.' She stood up and walked to the door of the mansion where a multitude of people were standing.

She recognized the tallest of the bunch, a flaming red-head who was also one of her most treasured friends, Ron Weasley. Standing next to him was his wife of just over six months, Susan Bones, the quiet Hufflepuff of their school years. The next two people were no surprise, because anywhere Ron went, it seemed his sister still liked to tag along. Ginny Weasley was berating her husband, Harry Potter, about something that seemed of importance. 'It's good to know some things never change.' she thought with a grin. The next person her eyes settled on was Pansy Parkinson. The Slytherin girl still had her fake, blonde hair and cherry red lips, but she seemed to have matured and grown into them over the years. Now, instead of looking like a high-priced hooker, she was a confident woman who just wore a little too much make up. Her husband, Blaise Zabini, was obviously trying to get Harry out of the wrath of a Weasley. Justin Finch-Fletchley and his wife, Padma Patil were the last ones. Perhaps the smartest of the couples, they were standing back and enjoying the show.

Hermione stepped out onto the deck and smiled at everyone. Her own hubby, Draco Malfoy, was setting things up in the living room of the mansion and waiting for the arrival of the rest of the guys. The Quidditch Finals were going on, and the Chudley Canons and Puddlemere United were playing today. Draco, being the wonderful person he was, invited the guys over to the mansion to watch the game on a seventy-two inch television he had charmed to broadcast the game. Hermione was happy to have visitors, as the mansion was huge and largely uninhabited. And all of the guys were Quidditch players from their years at Hogwarts. Draco and Harry had been Seekers, Justin was a Chaser, and Blaise was a Beater for their respective house teams.

After the final, cataclysmic battle in her final year, Hermione had learned that many of the people she had believed to be Death Eaters- in - training were actually spies for Dumbledore. Draco Malfoy, Pansy Parkinson, and Blaise Zabini were only a few of the Slytherin students who went against the beliefs of their families and turned traitor to the Dark Lord. All three of the Slytherin students' parents had been killed during the battle. Lucius Malfoy and Everett Zabini had died at the hands of their own children; it had not been a pleasant fight. Now, all three of the young adults were richer than believable and married to people who they loved dearly.

" Hey, everyone." she beamed up at the group. "How are you guys doing?" At the sound of her voice, Ron and Harry dropped what they were doing and grinned like two mischievous twins.

"MIONE!!" they yelled. They took two steps forward and scooped her up in a huge hug. Hermione grinned and batted at their arms, trying to breath. The boys were so much stronger than her, but she enjoyed getting to see them again.

"Guys....let.....me.....go!" she panted. "Can't .....breath!" The two boys grinned and shook their heads in unison.

"Nope."

"No. Way." were the only responses.

"Harry," Ginny admonished, "let the poor girl go. You two big lugs are going to squeeze her too an early grave."

"Really, fellas," Blaise grinned. "Her husband can be very protective of her. I should know. He almost beat me up one day when I was talking with her." He snickered and Pansy rolled her eyes and swatted her husband on the head.

"Ginny's right, Ron." Susan said. "Besides, what would Draco think if he came out here and found you two hugging up on his wife?"

"I would think they are going to watch the game elsewhere today." came a cool voice from the inside of the manor. Hermione twisted around and saw a very smug looking Malfoy emerge from inside. "Let her go, Potter and Weasley. The only one allowed to hug up on her is me." Harry and Ron let her go and grinned.

"How you doing, Draco?" Harry asked. "Hermione let you back in the house, I see." Draco rolled his eyes and looked away.

"Very funny, Harry." Hermione said. "Let's go inside, everyone. The game is starting in a few minutes anyway." Draco and Hermione led the way into the house and the men and women separated at the living room. The boys plopped down onto the couches and started munching on whatever food was in sight.

"Men." Hermione muttered. "Always useless, as usual." The other women nodded and Hermione led them to another room that held couches and end tables. "Have a seat ladies." she gestured to the couches. "I'll get us some drinks. Any preferences?"

"Tea." Susan said.

"Butterbear." Pansy said.

"Anything's fine with me." Ginny said. Hermione nodded and rang for one of the house elves. She gave the little elf the order and two minutes later, a sterling silver tea set appeared on the table, complete with two bottles of butterbeer. Padma grinned and took her drink.

"So Hermione," she grinned. "You finallly gave up on house elf liberation and elf rights?" Hermione nodded and sat down.

"Yeah, I figured it was no point in trying to force them to do something that they didn't want to. I turned my energy to more important conquests." Hermione said. Pansy grinned and shook her head.

"Like the conquest to win Draco's attention?" she teased. "I do remember you finally giving up S.P.E.W. during our final year. Isn't that when you and Mr. Malfoy got together?" Hermione blushed and rolled her eyes.

"I'll never admit to that." she said with a grin. The women laughed and settled down to a good session of over due gossip.

"So, girls." Ginny began, "how's life been treating you?" Susan sighed and shook her head.

"It'll be better as soon as Quidditch season is over with. I'm so sick of hearing Ron talk about Quidditch, it's ridiculous. It's like he has forgotten there is anything else in the world besides broomsticks and Quidditch balls."

"I know how you feel." Pansy said, "I'm going to wring Blaise's neck if he doesn't shut up about it after this."

"If it makes you feel any better, Draco is just as bad." Hermione said. "Just out of curiosity's sake, who are you guys rooting for?"

"I hope the Canons win." Pansy said. "Blaise is going the same way."

"I want Puddlemere to win." Susan said. "But I won't tell Ron that because the Chudley Canons are his favorite."

"I want the Canons to win." Ginny said. "I guess I'm partial to the orange coloring. Harry is going for Puddlemere United because of Oliver and Katie."

"I hope Puddlemere wins." Padma said. "Justin and I are going for opposing teams. Besides, us Gryffindors have to stick together. Oliver Wood and Katie Bell are on Puddlemere's team now. Kate's a Chaser and Oliver is the Keeper."

"Yes, Katie just signed onto the team last season." Hermione said. "And she is already their lead Chaser. Draco mentioned that."

"Okay, that's enough Quidditch talk." Ginny said firmly. "I think we all hear enough of it at out own houses." The rest of the women nodded. Suddenly, there was a medley of voices coming from the other room. The women jumped up and went to the room, only to find the boys on their feet and yelling at the overly large television screen. The game had just started, and there was food all over the place already. Pretzels, popcorn, and candy wrappers were lying all over the place. They cringed as the boys let loose on the teams.

STUPID IDIOT!! I COULD HAVE CAUGHT THAT!!!" yelled Ron at the television.

"THE SNITCH WAS RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM!" Draco cried. "EVEN POTTER COULD HAVE CAUGHT THAT!!!"

"Hey!" Harry glared. "Watch it, Malfoy. You couldn't have caught it!"

"THOSE PLAYS ARE RIDICULOUS!" screamed Justin. "ANYONE CAN BREAK THOSE DEFENSES. WHAT ARE THOSE COACHES THINKING?"

"BLATANT FOUL PLAY!!!" cried Harry. "THOSE BEATERS SHOULD BE FOULED!!! THIS IS RIDICULOUS!! REMINDS ME OF SLYTHERIN'S TACTICS. DEVIOUS, DECEITFUL, AND DOWN RIGHT DIRTY!"

"Hey, watch it, Potter!" Blaise and Draco warned, glaring at the boy.

The berating continued and the five young women shook their heads and returned to the parlor they had just vacated.

"Did you notice that they slip into using surnames when there is a Quidditch game going on?" Padma asked with a grin. "Any other time they use their first names."

"They're acting like children." Susan said.

"Let them go." Pansy said with a flourish. "They're having fun."

"Yeah, it's a form of male-bonding." Hermione grinned. "You get a bunch of your buddies together and yell at the television screen and throw food all over the place." Another loud boo was heard from the living room, punctuated by the men's criticisms.

"I wonder if they realize that no one the television can hear them?" Ginny said with a grin. The girls snickered and Hermione pulled out her wand and conjured up some muffins and biscuits to eat. More moans and groans could be heard from the living room. Finally, Pansy pulled out her wand and placed a silencing charm on the room where the boys were. Murmurs of 'thank yous' and 'it's about time' were heard through out the girls.

"You know." Susan said thoughtfully, "I'm beginning to think all men are the same."

"Oh, they are, Susan." Pansy said.

"Yeah, you and Ron just got married six months ago," Padma said with a grin. "Give it a few more months. Then, all Hell breaks loose."

"Months?" Pansy said, "It only took me a week before I figured out Blaise was a lost cause. It's been the same ever since."

"How about you, Hermione?" Ginny grinned. "How long before Draco became a louse?"

"Two days." the younger girl answered with a grimace.

"Honestly," Ginny said. "I believe you. Harry isn't much better."

"I think men are pre-ordained to be like that." Susan said.

"I agree." Hermione said. "In fact here's a few examples of what Draco has put me through lately.......

(A/N: Does this sound familiar to anyone who has had a Super Bowl party at their house? Remember, I love reviews. Reviews are good. Reviews are good. Oh, and I realize that some of the story will probably be choppy. But remember, these are women dissing on their husbands. You only understand it if you are in there. Later. Remember that little purple button down there. It is your friend.)