Songfic to Finger Eleven's 'Stay and Drown'
By Aria Stardust
Dedicated to all my sisters in the Shadow Realm Fellowship
& anyone who loves Jack and Will as much as I do.
–@–
Disclaimer// I don't own anything to do with Pirates of the Carribean. In fact, I don't own anything you'd want. I spent my last 3 bucks on a soda at the movie today. So I'm broke. *sigh* It's depressing. And for that matter, I don't own the song either! Grr... this really is getting depressing.
Summary// Shipwrecked, Will thinks about Jack as the sun beats down on them from above. (Jack/Will)
Genre// Romance, Drama... maybe a bit of some angst too.
The sun was what woke me, I think. It burned when I first opened my eyes, but I realized that I wasn't supposed to be lying on hot sand, either. As I felt around, I felt a knot forming in my stomach. I was alone on a beach that I most certainly didn't belong on.
"Where am I?" I mumbled, fighting my foggy brain for any details on how I'd gotten here. Finally it hit me, like a barrel of bricks. We'd been shipwrecked. Then I puzzled a second. We? Who had we been...
Then I remembered. "Jack..." I trailed.
Jack Sparrow, Captain of the Black Pearl. I'd been sailing with him... and we'd both been thrown overboard in a storm. I stared over the sea with a deadening sense of dread. Had Jack washed ashore as I had?
I managed to stand and dusted myself off. I glanced up and down the beach but saw nothing. "Dear God, please... don't let him be..." I trailed off. I couldn't speak the words out loud, but my mind spoke them. '...dead.'
No, he can't be dead... not Jack Sparrow. He's too... too... too important to me to be dead!
I let a breath out in relief when I spotted a mass of black braids laying on the sand a bit down the beach. He was on the island. I ran towards him.
I knelt beside him and was fully relieved that he did in fact draw breath. I was contented to sit beside him, watching his chest raise and lower. I swallowed hard and found myself holding his hand. I would never admit how afraid I was at that moment.
I realized that I'd been more afraid before I found Jack. I found myself thinking that everything was going to be alright when he was around. Maybe he might be able to get us off this island, I hoped. The next second my mind brought my hopes down. It was impossible, I thought.
Nothing's impossible with Jack Sparrow, I've come to realize.
"Sleep well, Jack." I whispered, raising his hand to my forehead and squeezing it a little harder than I intended. He stirred a bit, but did not wake. I smile a bit as I watched him squirm around, finding a spot to his liking.
I love him. There, I said it. Well, not out loud of course, but I admitted it. Now, I'll never work up enough courage to tell him that, but that's all well and good I guess.
I hesitated. If I was going to die here anyway, why not tell him? The worst he can do is reject me... I thought about this for a second and was surprised at how fast I steeled myself to the idea. I could tell him, and do it right now.
I reach my hand and touched his cheek gently. I opened my mouth to speak, but no words came out. No! I can't become mute now!
"Jack." I said, though my voice was barely above a whisper. I cleared my throat and ran a shaky hand through my hair. How was I going to tell him this?
I'm a fool. I can't do it. No possible way I can tell this man that I love him. He'd have a bloody laugh at me and I couldn't bare if he didn't feel this way in return.
I glanced around for anything else to look at, to think about. I was desperate at this point.
Everything on this beautiful little paradise to see, and no reason or way for that matter that I can get my mind off the man that's sleeping right here. If I had the mind set to sigh, I might, but I was far to edgy and damned nervous.
The sounds of waves crashing on the beach was bad enough for my nerves at this point.
The world seemed so...transparent and distant right now. All that was real was Jack. And he was too real for my nerves. I moved my hand from his cheek and rested it on his chest.
How could I love this man? He was a scoundrel, a pirate, whatever you wanted to label him as...
I sighed. I can't even question it. He's the greatest person I've ever known. He's fun, and lively, and he's always got a plan that somehow works out in the end. He saved my life... not that's uncommon at this point in my life, but he's... just... different. Oh man, I'm rambling again.
This paradise is just so peaceful, and beyond the immediate danger, this feels like the perfect time to tell Jack how I feel. But I don't know... how could he feel the same about me? I mean, he's had so many women...
And I'm a no one blacksmith. I sighed and slunk down to the sand, head resting on my hand, which happened to be on Jack's chest still. I stared into the distance and nibbled at my lip nervously. To tell him, or not to tell him?
I'm so confused, but I do know one thing. Lying here, head pillowed on his chest, I feel so peaceful... so right. It's like we're meant to be.
But I know this isn't real. It can't be. The island is like a million I've seen with Jack on the Black Pearl, but it's still so beautiful. I have to be dreaming, even though I'm stuck on an island, I'm stuck with Jack.
I sighed a bit and turned my head to stare towards his face. I wondered again... should I wake him and tell him how I feel?
I toyed with my thoughts, trying to urge myself to do the one thing that I knew would satisfy me. Even if Jack didn't return my feelings, though it would hurt it would not kill me... as long as he knew how I felt, I told myself, I would be satisfied.
I finally steeled myself and sat up a bit, reaching over to shake Jack awake.
"Jack, wake up." I urged. A moment later, a some grunting passed, Jack was awake and staring around us.
"We're stuck here, aren't we?" he mumbled. "Well," he started, trying to stand. I caught his wrist before I realized what I was doing. He looked at me, puzzled, and I hurried on.
"I have to talk to you first, Jack." I blurted out. He nodded slightly and sat back down across from me.
"Sure, Will." he managed, obviously seeing how stressed out I was.
I took a deep breath and let it out again, steeling myself at what was coming. "Jack.. I... I have to tell you... Oh God, Jack I..." I stuttered, finally closing my mouth and licking my lips. They were very dry all of a sudden. Come to think of it, so was my mouth. "Jack, I love you." I blurted. I couldn't bring myself to look up at him.
It was silent a long moment and I knew my face was turning beet red. I pushed to my feet and stuttered an apology. I turned to leave in my embarrassment, but Jack could my wrist this time.
I glanced at him and saw he wasn't laughing at me. In fact, he looked downright serious. "Nothing to apologize for, Will." he said in a tone that made me want to be closer to him.
He seemed to note this and smiled wide. "Glad you finally brought that out in the open. I was afraid I was going to have to be the one who first admitted that we felt like this."
It took a few moments to digest what he said.
By the time I realized what he'd said, Jack was kissing me. It felt so wonderful. His rough lips on mine. The both of the sets chapped as hell, but neither of us cared. I tentively snaked my arms around him, and found he followed that lead quite fast.
His taste was definitely one of a kind. I wondered at the hints of rum and apple, sweet and bitter all at once. It was pleasant.
I knew I was crying, and I didn't care. I'd faced what was perhaps the most terrifying experience of my life and come out happier than I'd ever thought possible. I didn't even seem to care that we were shipwrecked.
After all, he was Jack Sparrow after all. He'd find a way out. And even if he didn't, by God I was going to enjoy every moment that we both lived to it's fullest.
"As much as I enjoyed that..." Jack began a few moments later, looking into my eyes in a way I thought he never would. "We need to find a way off this rock." he said.
I smiled slightly, suddenly doubtful. "But how?" I asked. "It's seems impossible." I mumbled.
Jack sent me a slight smile that quickly spread into a grin that I loved. "But you're forgetting one very important fact... I'm Captain Jack Sparrow."