Thanks so much to Alex the Gopher for rockin out with me on figurin out this ending. Thanks Alex, hon! I'm on a roll, so I thought I'd finish it tonight! Are you excited? I know I am.
WARNING THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS FRANK LANGUAGE...So without further ado:
SEVERUS SNAPE, COMPUTER HACKER Chapter Ten: It's Nice To Finally Meet You
"He's been up there all morning," Ginny said as her Queen slayed Hermione's knight. "Shouldn't someone talk to him? Maybe we can get him to go outside where everyone else is. It's a nice day."
"Yeah," Hermione replied. "Poor Harry. What a disappointment, to think you've found your soul mate and end up with a lying sneak. I think I'll go have a talk with him."
"No," Ron said, standing up. "I'll talk to him. He may be gay, but he's still a guy, and men hate being embarrassed in front of women."
Hermione smiled at her boyfriend. "That's good, Ron. I think he'd like it if you talked with him."
Ron smiled, and went up the stairs two steps at a time until he reached the seventh year dorm.
"Harry," he said as he opened the door. His friend was lying on his back in bed, but was already dressed.
"Hey, Ron."
"Do you feel like talking?"
Harry sat up and crossed his legs. "Sure...I need to figure some things out. I wouldn't mind a second opinion."
Ron sat cross-legged on the other end of the bed and the mates sat there in silence for a moment. Harry was the first to break it.
"I still can't believe that he's who I've been talking to this whole time."
"I knew he shouldn't be trusted," Ron said before thinking. "Oh...sorry, mate."
"No, it's okay," Harry replied.
"I just can't believe that Snape would lie to you like that for a whole year just to get your trust. He's always trying to find a way to get you in trouble. You must be so disappointed." Ron looked up when Harry let out a short laugh.
"No, actually," Harry said. "I don't think he ever lied to me, and he wasn't trying to bust me."
"But he said he was a student...didn't he?"
Harry shook his head. "He never did. All he ever said was that he was old enough to be here. I assumed he meant old enough to be a student."
"So he wasn't trying to get you in trouble?"
"No," Harry said. "I don't believe so. I guess he was really lonely after all. Like me."
"Wait...then if he didn't threaten you with blackmail or something...what happened in detention to make you so upset?" Ron's cheeks were already flushing with embarrassment just thinking about the possibilities.
"Well, he wasn't disappointing, if you know what I mean...er, sorry. But do you really want to know? It involves a little guy on guy..." Harry's voice trailed off and he bit his lip. Ron looked horrified.
"Harry...you didn't..."
"No! Not that. Nothing like that."
"Then...what?"
"Well," he said, distractedly ruffling his hair. "I was helping him make potions for Pomfrey and he came up behind me because I was doing something wrong and put his hand on mine. I was a bit unnerved because he wouldn't let go. Then when he did, he didn't go back to his potion, and when I turned around he kinda...pressed me up against the table, and was kissing my neck...this isn't bothering you, is it?"
Ron tried to keep his face blank. "Um...no."
"Then he was about to kiss me, but I told him to stop because I was confused. When he stepped back I just ran."
"And then ran into us...I see." Harry nodded. They were silent for a few moments.
"I'm proud of you for not freaking out, Ron," Harry told him. Ron smiled.
"I want to be here for you," he answered. "I've got to be able to handle hearing things like this because you're not going to up and start snogging girls, and as best mates we ought to be able to talk about...sex...without my freaking out. I think the weirdest bit is that it was Snape."
Harry nodded in understanding. "That's the weirdest bit for me, too. I wouldn't have said half the things I said to him if I'd known. I wouldn't have dared."
"Doesn't it bother you that he's so much older?"
Harry thought for a moment. "No. I am of age...and I've always thought that age doesn't matter if you really care for someone. I think he was letting me see his true self when we talked together. Looking back I don't know why I didn't realized sooner that it was Snape. There were a few moments when he almost gave himself away, actually."
"Really?"
"Yeah," Harry said, remembering with a smile. "He let me have the raspberry scone at Christmas tea because he said it was my favourite. I was so surprised at the nice gesture that I didn't think too much about how he knew it was my favourite."
"Snape was nice to you?" Ron looked confused and Harry laughed.
"I suppose he can be sometimes. He even called me Harry yesterday." He paused and looked into his lap. "That was the nicest part."
"You really like him then?"
Harry looked up again. "Yes. I do. Or at least, I like the person I think he is, if that makes any sense. And I want to find out if he's really like that."
"And you think he likes you?"
"I doubt that what happened yesterday would have happened if he'd only been trying to bust me. He could get in trouble for having a relationship with a student, and I don't think he'd risk that, go that far, just to act out on some grudge," Harry pointed out. "And he must care about my feelings if he stopped when I asked him to. He's certainly a lot stronger than me, and could have...well. You know."
Ron chewed on his bottom lip for a moment. "You have my support if this is what you want...even if he is a greasy git. And I think you'd better talk to him if you are seriously going to pursue this."
Out of nowhere, Ron found himself being hugged by Harry. "Thanks, Ron. That means more to me than you could know."
"No problem...I can't breathe though, and that is a problem."
Harry released Ron and laughed. "Sorry."
"No matter," Ron said, standing up. "Just go already. Go get your...glasses. Or something."
Hermione looked up as Harry walked into the room. "Harry! I'm so glad you're up and- okay...bye?"
Harry had headed straight for the portrait and was gone before she could finish her sentence. Ron walked up behind his girlfriend and put his hands on her shoulders.
"Where's he going," Ginny asked. "Check mate, by the way."
"Drat," Hermione said. "You Weasleys are too good at this. And where is he going?"
"To talk to Snape," Ron answered. He plopped down on the couch and looked at the two girls calmly.
"You're kidding," Ginny said. "The only thing I'd be doing concerning Snape would be hexing him into next year."
"But Harry says that Snape isn't trying to bust him," Ron said matter of factly. Hermione raised an eyebrow.
"Oh?"
"Yeah. But it turns out he really was hitting on him," Ron smiled at the dumbfounded look on both of their faces.
"That's..."
"...weird." Ginny said, finishing Hermione's sentence. Ron shrugged.
"It is weird, but if this is his chance for happiness he should go for it. Life hasn't been all that kind to him so far. I think they might really like each other, and I'm supporting Harry, no matter what."
Hermione got up and tackled Ron.
"I love you so much, Ron Weasley! You're the sweetest boy in the world!"
"That's nice, and I love you, too, but could you let me breathe, please?"
"Oh, sorry," she said.
Ginny laughed. "Let's wait for him outside, shall we?"
The door to the potions room was open when Harry reached the dungeons. He considered whether or not to knock and then decided against it. Instead, he popped his head in to look around. Empty.
"He must be in his office," he mumbled to no one in particular. He closed the classroom door and went down the hall until he reached the door to Snape's office. Forcing himself to breathe deep, calm breaths he raised his hand and knocked.
No answer. Should he knock again?
"Just do it, Potter," he told himself. He raised his fist again and knocked a little louder.
"This'd better be important," a deep voice growled. Harry's breath caught in his throat as the door swung open. "I'm very busy and- Har- ahem... Mr. Potter?"
Snape's mask fell away for a brief moment as he stumbled over Harry's name, which rattled Harry. He had never seen Snape be anything but collected, shrewd and sure of himself.
"I've...I-"
"Yes?" The mask was back and Snape was beginning to look bored.
"I forgot my glasses." Harry said softly, angry with himself for sounding timid. Snape stood back and motioned him in.
"They're in here somewhere. I would have sent them to your room, but my raven is out with a letter." Snape began to look around the desk and over various shelves. He knew exactly where he'd put them, but needed the time to think. Should he mention yesterday? Would Harry mention yesterday?
The snarky adult in him was saying to dismiss it as a mistake and stomp out the problem as soon as possible. The lonely adult was telling him to confess his feelings and admit that it was certainly not a problem. His inner child was telling him to play like it hadn't happened at all. Severus Snape had never been more confused by himself.
Finally, as he opened the drawer in which he had carefully placed the glasses the previous night, Snape decided he would not be the one to bring it up.
"Ah...here they are." He sat down as he handed the glasses to their owner, who didn't put them on. "I dare say you had trouble without them...good day."
He sat down in his chair and took up his grading quill, tensed until he heard his office door close.
"Not really," Harry replied.
Snape looked up. "Still here, are you?"
Harry didn't reply, but took a seat. "My eyesight isn't all that bad."
'He's sitting down,' Snape informed himself. 'Why is he sitting down?'
"The biggest problem I have is not being able to see the writing on boards...or knowing who's saying hi to me down the hall," Harry continued.
"I see," Snape replied. Was this supposed to be small talk?
"I wanted to talk to you," Harry said.
'Shit.'
"About yesterday." Harry nervously ran his fingers through his hair.
"Yes?" Snape cursed himself for not being able to say something more, whether it be an explanation or sarcasm.
"I'm sorry, first of all, for running out on you...and out on detention as well."
Snape took a moment to think about this before replying. He decided to bite the bullet. "I understood perfectly why you ran out. No apology is needed."
Harry gave him a small smile. "Good. Thank you. Okay, I also wanted to make sure that...that you haven't been lying to me the whole year. Ron and Hermione are sure that you were trying to set me up. But I don't believe that. Of course, I really don't know one way or the other. I just think you're a better person than that."
'Ouch...'
Snape stood and took up pacing behind his desk while formulating an answer that didn't make him feel foolish, although every thought that came to mind made him feel such. But he had to say something.
"I have to tell you, and please let me finish, that my original intent was to...well, frankly, to crush you. I was being immature and vengeful for something that isn't even your fault. And please bear in mind that it is taking all of my being to admit this to you. I am trusting in the maturity I know you have to not use this display of weakness to your...advantage."
"I don't think it's weak," Harry replied. "A man must be strong to admit that he has been mistaken."
"Thank you, Mr. Potter." Snape looked him directly in the eyes, and Harry could see that the thanks was genuine.
"But then you have been lying to me, the whole year," Harry said, lowering his eyes to hide his disappointment. Snape stopped pacing and placed his hands on the back of his chair.
'I can't believe I'm doing this.'
"No. I have never lied to you. I have only lied to myself. The feelings I expressed to you this past year, and those I displayed yesterday, were true, as inappropriate as they are...which is why you ran out, no doubt. I would have if an old man had come on to me at your age." Snape straightened up and turned to look at a shelf of books. After all this, he could not face Harry. In the deepest part of his mind he was sure that the Gryffindor was laughing at his confession. He jumped when he heard Harry speak from directly behind him.
"I don't think it was inappropriate, as long as you really feel for me." Harry shuffled his feet as Snape turned around. "I ran away because I was confused. I've had this odd crush on you for a while...well, you know that, I told you. And at the same time, I was falling for some person that I didn't even know in real life. Can you imagine how surprising it was to find that you and he were the same person?"
"I hadn't thought on it," Snape replied. Harry stood taller, prouder.
"I had a long time to think about it last night while everyone was sleeping. I told them I wanted to be alone. I didn't want to talk to them about it. And as the minutes went by, I realized it was because the only person I wanted to talk to about it was TheMaster... you."
Snape's features were as emotionless as ever, but Harry could see something different in his eyes. It encouraged him to continue.
"I may be a student here, and there may be an age difference between us, but I don't think that matters. Legally, I'm of age. Emotionally, I feel too old for men who are even five years older than me. They don't know what it's like...what it's like to go through-"
"What it's like to go through hell," Snape finished for him.
"We understand each other, I think," Harry said, holding Snape's gaze firmly in his own. "Am I wrong?"
"No."
"Then nothing we do together could ever be inappropriate," Harry said, moving forward to put his hand against Snape's chest. Snape wanted Harry's gentle touch more than anything, but suddenly, something in him recoiled and the persona he'd built up for years lashed out.
"I don't know what you think you're doing, Mr. Potter."
"Excuse me?" Harry's hand stopped in mid air and then fell to his side.
"I don't know what you expect from me. I don't have time for a relationship with anyone, let alone a spoilt, bigheaded brat like you. I've been doing just fine on my own and it's going to remain that way. The only person I can trust is me." Snape's face was contorted with anger, although Harry couldn't tell whom it was directed at. His own eyes became dark with frustration.
"You were the one who refused to reveal your identity. I told you everything the whole time. I was always honest. I trusted you with a secret that if revealed could make my life more hellish than it already is! And on top of all that, you were the one who came on to me yesterday, if you've quite forgotten."
Snape looked livid now. "And you plan on pressing charges then, do you?"
"No!"
"Well then?"
"What's the matter with you? I thought you cared... Why would you have sent me this pendant if you didn't? It's obvious that I mean something. You wouldn't have sent it if I didn't..."
"I-"
"I'm not finished," Harry spat out. Snape closed his mouth, taken aback. "Minutes ago, you were confessing real feelings to me. REAL feelings. And now you're accusing and mean spirited. It's all a mask and I can see through it now. You're afraid. Your whole life you've been afraid. You're just a sad, lonely man."
There was a long silence, the two men glaring at each other with confused anger. After a moment, Snape turned his eyes down. Harry's anger melted away as he realized the potion master was defeated. He immediately regretted his words.
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean-"
"No, Mr. Potter," Snape said, turning his eyes to look out the window. "You are perfectly correct."
"Look, I was angry. I didn't mean what I said...and I don't think you mean what you said either. I like you a lot. I want a chance to know you better."
"Apparently, you know me better than I know myself."
Harry knew what needed to be done. He reached a hand out to Snape's face and turned the man's head to look him in the eyes.
"I would never use anything you say against you. I want you to trust me," Harry said, taking a step forward. Snape took a step backward without realizing it and bumped into his bookcase.
"Mr. P-"
"Call me, Harry. I like it."
Snape felt as if some unearthly force was pulling his face toward the young man in front of him. Harry tilted his face up to look directly into Snape's eyes.
"Harry..."
"It's nice to finally meet you in person," he said. The next moment he couldn't have torn his lips away from the professor's even if he had wanted to. Severus Snape wasn't going to let him.
One hand wrapped firmly around Harry's waist and the other was digging through his hair. Harry's hand was caught between their bodies but he didn't notice, nor would he have cared. His other hand was pressed into the back muscles below Snape's shoulder blades, his fingers digging into the flesh through the robes and shirt.
Snape's tongue was running along Harry's bottom lip, darting in and out of the sweet mouth, battling with another tongue. He trailed bites and kisses down the smooth neck until he reached the collarbone. The sound of heavy breathing was filling the room, intoxicating Snape's senses. Again, he walked Harry backwards to press him against the desk, asserting his dominant position. His mouth broke contact as he pushed Harry back into a stack of papers. Normally he might have minded, but all he could see at that moment was Harry.
"You want me," he proclaimed as he pressed his hips against the young man's.
Harry looked up at him through heavy lidded eyes. "I want you."
Snape leaned over and rubbed his bulge against Harry's own growing erection. Harry's breath caught. He reached up and fumbled with the robes, allowing them to slide off Snape's shoulders. He could hear the heavy fabric hit the floor. Now Snape was wearing a black button up shirt and slacks.
"Boy, do I want you," he gritted out, pulling the man down on top of him. They were grinding their hips together with more intensity, gripping flesh, biting. Harry wrapped his legs around Snape's waist to bring them even closer together.
"You need me," Snape growled and continued to bite at Harry's neck.
"I need you. I have to see you. I have to have you."
With all his strength, Harry pushed Snape off of him and slithered from the desk to the floor. He kneeled in front of the panting man as if lowering himself before a king...a master. His hands reached out to Snape's belt and loosed it, pulling it out of the loops and to the floor. Snape could only watch as the beautiful creature knelt before him. Harry then unfastened the buttons on the slacks and pulled them open. An erection was straining against Snape's underwear. Harry threw his arms around Snape's legs and nuzzled the bulge. Gasps were coming from above and Harry smiled.
"I want to please you. I want your cock in my mouth," he said. "If you'll allow it."
Snape gazed down at Harry, who was licking his lips suggestively. "I would desire nothing more..."
Harry's hands eagerly moved to the waistband of the underwear and he started to tug them down when Snape's hands grabbed his and stayed them.
"I would desire nothing more, but I would like to wait."
Harry looked up at Snape with disappointment. The professor pulled the underwear back into place and knelt so he could look straight into Harry's face.
"There is nothing more arousing than thinking of you giving me pleasure right now, but I'm using every ounce of my will power to stop you."
"I thought you wanted this," Harry said.
"I do. Believe me, I do. But not right here, and not yet. We've talked the whole year, but whereas I've known it was you the whole time, you just found out who I am. I want you to be sure. And...I'd also like you to not be a student of mine anymore. I can't help feeling like I'm taking advantage, even if you are willing."
Harry sighed and fell forward against Snape's chest. The other man wrapped his arms around him.
"I suppose I wouldn't want you to get into trouble either," Harry said, "But this is going to be very hard."
"Tell me about it," Snape said. They caught each other's eyes and both started to bite their lips to contain their laughter.
"Cheeky," Harry said, mimicking the other.
Snape smiled, but his face was serious. "Look. I'm not an easy person to get along with, much less have a relationship with. You've seen it...I lash out. I'm not telling you to bugger off, I'm just warning you."
"I lash out, too," Harry said. "Despite my Golden Boy image, I'm not perfect. No one is. I'm willing to work for a relationship."
"I have a demanding job. And a demanding spying job."
"I have a demanding life," Harry replied. Snape snorted at this, but not to be rude. Harry knew he'd won. Snape allowed him to stand, and then rearranged himself, retrieved his belt and picked up his robe. When the potion master was finished, Harry leaned against him and put his arms around his waist.
"What can we do if you aren't going to shag me on your desk," he asked looking up at the other with faux innocence. Snape shook his head.
"Lustful brat. I suppose, as long as it's in secret, we can do this," he answered leaning down and capturing Harry's lips. "And this," he said against Harry's neck, nipping him below the ear.
"How about this," Harry said, grabbing at Snape's arse. Snape growled in response. "I suppose that means yes."
Snape pulled the Gryffindor's hands away from his hind region and placed them somewhere safer. "If you stay any longer I'm afraid I won't be able to contain myself. If you aren't careful, you might find yourself shagged right and proper."
Harry smirked and brushed his hips against Snape's. "Are you sure we can't..."
Snape pushed Harry's hips away.
"We are going to wait," he said firmly.
Harry smiled coyly and walked around to the front of the desk to retrieve his glasses. Snape watched as he made his was to the door. As he turned the handle, Harry looked back.
"Your word is my command...master."
THE END! NO! Don't throw that at me! Stop! Stop with the tomatoes and cabbage! No, not the lettuce! ...of course now I could have a nice salad.
Now, as I said earlier this is the end of this particular plot line but I'm very prepared to write a much juicier sequel. So save your fruits and veggies for a bunny rabbit because all it takes is a few requests to continue with a new fic about them having a relationship (and yes, that involves shagging), and bam! Your wish is my command. I really hope you enjoyed my fic and I hope you would like to see more from me :)
HUGS!!!!!!! KISSES!
Dav
NEW AUTHOR'S NOTE (thanks Lady Lynn for the warning!)
Hello everyone! I just wanted to thank you all for your continued reviews and say that I am working on a follow up and the other fic, Adventures in Life Drawing. I'm currently on vacation in another country, but I shall return with some goodies for you all. Right now my fic is in a competition, so please vote for me! I can't post the link here, but I'll put it in my information.
Thanks everyone!
Kisses to all,
Dav
WARNING THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS FRANK LANGUAGE...So without further ado:
SEVERUS SNAPE, COMPUTER HACKER Chapter Ten: It's Nice To Finally Meet You
"He's been up there all morning," Ginny said as her Queen slayed Hermione's knight. "Shouldn't someone talk to him? Maybe we can get him to go outside where everyone else is. It's a nice day."
"Yeah," Hermione replied. "Poor Harry. What a disappointment, to think you've found your soul mate and end up with a lying sneak. I think I'll go have a talk with him."
"No," Ron said, standing up. "I'll talk to him. He may be gay, but he's still a guy, and men hate being embarrassed in front of women."
Hermione smiled at her boyfriend. "That's good, Ron. I think he'd like it if you talked with him."
Ron smiled, and went up the stairs two steps at a time until he reached the seventh year dorm.
"Harry," he said as he opened the door. His friend was lying on his back in bed, but was already dressed.
"Hey, Ron."
"Do you feel like talking?"
Harry sat up and crossed his legs. "Sure...I need to figure some things out. I wouldn't mind a second opinion."
Ron sat cross-legged on the other end of the bed and the mates sat there in silence for a moment. Harry was the first to break it.
"I still can't believe that he's who I've been talking to this whole time."
"I knew he shouldn't be trusted," Ron said before thinking. "Oh...sorry, mate."
"No, it's okay," Harry replied.
"I just can't believe that Snape would lie to you like that for a whole year just to get your trust. He's always trying to find a way to get you in trouble. You must be so disappointed." Ron looked up when Harry let out a short laugh.
"No, actually," Harry said. "I don't think he ever lied to me, and he wasn't trying to bust me."
"But he said he was a student...didn't he?"
Harry shook his head. "He never did. All he ever said was that he was old enough to be here. I assumed he meant old enough to be a student."
"So he wasn't trying to get you in trouble?"
"No," Harry said. "I don't believe so. I guess he was really lonely after all. Like me."
"Wait...then if he didn't threaten you with blackmail or something...what happened in detention to make you so upset?" Ron's cheeks were already flushing with embarrassment just thinking about the possibilities.
"Well, he wasn't disappointing, if you know what I mean...er, sorry. But do you really want to know? It involves a little guy on guy..." Harry's voice trailed off and he bit his lip. Ron looked horrified.
"Harry...you didn't..."
"No! Not that. Nothing like that."
"Then...what?"
"Well," he said, distractedly ruffling his hair. "I was helping him make potions for Pomfrey and he came up behind me because I was doing something wrong and put his hand on mine. I was a bit unnerved because he wouldn't let go. Then when he did, he didn't go back to his potion, and when I turned around he kinda...pressed me up against the table, and was kissing my neck...this isn't bothering you, is it?"
Ron tried to keep his face blank. "Um...no."
"Then he was about to kiss me, but I told him to stop because I was confused. When he stepped back I just ran."
"And then ran into us...I see." Harry nodded. They were silent for a few moments.
"I'm proud of you for not freaking out, Ron," Harry told him. Ron smiled.
"I want to be here for you," he answered. "I've got to be able to handle hearing things like this because you're not going to up and start snogging girls, and as best mates we ought to be able to talk about...sex...without my freaking out. I think the weirdest bit is that it was Snape."
Harry nodded in understanding. "That's the weirdest bit for me, too. I wouldn't have said half the things I said to him if I'd known. I wouldn't have dared."
"Doesn't it bother you that he's so much older?"
Harry thought for a moment. "No. I am of age...and I've always thought that age doesn't matter if you really care for someone. I think he was letting me see his true self when we talked together. Looking back I don't know why I didn't realized sooner that it was Snape. There were a few moments when he almost gave himself away, actually."
"Really?"
"Yeah," Harry said, remembering with a smile. "He let me have the raspberry scone at Christmas tea because he said it was my favourite. I was so surprised at the nice gesture that I didn't think too much about how he knew it was my favourite."
"Snape was nice to you?" Ron looked confused and Harry laughed.
"I suppose he can be sometimes. He even called me Harry yesterday." He paused and looked into his lap. "That was the nicest part."
"You really like him then?"
Harry looked up again. "Yes. I do. Or at least, I like the person I think he is, if that makes any sense. And I want to find out if he's really like that."
"And you think he likes you?"
"I doubt that what happened yesterday would have happened if he'd only been trying to bust me. He could get in trouble for having a relationship with a student, and I don't think he'd risk that, go that far, just to act out on some grudge," Harry pointed out. "And he must care about my feelings if he stopped when I asked him to. He's certainly a lot stronger than me, and could have...well. You know."
Ron chewed on his bottom lip for a moment. "You have my support if this is what you want...even if he is a greasy git. And I think you'd better talk to him if you are seriously going to pursue this."
Out of nowhere, Ron found himself being hugged by Harry. "Thanks, Ron. That means more to me than you could know."
"No problem...I can't breathe though, and that is a problem."
Harry released Ron and laughed. "Sorry."
"No matter," Ron said, standing up. "Just go already. Go get your...glasses. Or something."
Hermione looked up as Harry walked into the room. "Harry! I'm so glad you're up and- okay...bye?"
Harry had headed straight for the portrait and was gone before she could finish her sentence. Ron walked up behind his girlfriend and put his hands on her shoulders.
"Where's he going," Ginny asked. "Check mate, by the way."
"Drat," Hermione said. "You Weasleys are too good at this. And where is he going?"
"To talk to Snape," Ron answered. He plopped down on the couch and looked at the two girls calmly.
"You're kidding," Ginny said. "The only thing I'd be doing concerning Snape would be hexing him into next year."
"But Harry says that Snape isn't trying to bust him," Ron said matter of factly. Hermione raised an eyebrow.
"Oh?"
"Yeah. But it turns out he really was hitting on him," Ron smiled at the dumbfounded look on both of their faces.
"That's..."
"...weird." Ginny said, finishing Hermione's sentence. Ron shrugged.
"It is weird, but if this is his chance for happiness he should go for it. Life hasn't been all that kind to him so far. I think they might really like each other, and I'm supporting Harry, no matter what."
Hermione got up and tackled Ron.
"I love you so much, Ron Weasley! You're the sweetest boy in the world!"
"That's nice, and I love you, too, but could you let me breathe, please?"
"Oh, sorry," she said.
Ginny laughed. "Let's wait for him outside, shall we?"
The door to the potions room was open when Harry reached the dungeons. He considered whether or not to knock and then decided against it. Instead, he popped his head in to look around. Empty.
"He must be in his office," he mumbled to no one in particular. He closed the classroom door and went down the hall until he reached the door to Snape's office. Forcing himself to breathe deep, calm breaths he raised his hand and knocked.
No answer. Should he knock again?
"Just do it, Potter," he told himself. He raised his fist again and knocked a little louder.
"This'd better be important," a deep voice growled. Harry's breath caught in his throat as the door swung open. "I'm very busy and- Har- ahem... Mr. Potter?"
Snape's mask fell away for a brief moment as he stumbled over Harry's name, which rattled Harry. He had never seen Snape be anything but collected, shrewd and sure of himself.
"I've...I-"
"Yes?" The mask was back and Snape was beginning to look bored.
"I forgot my glasses." Harry said softly, angry with himself for sounding timid. Snape stood back and motioned him in.
"They're in here somewhere. I would have sent them to your room, but my raven is out with a letter." Snape began to look around the desk and over various shelves. He knew exactly where he'd put them, but needed the time to think. Should he mention yesterday? Would Harry mention yesterday?
The snarky adult in him was saying to dismiss it as a mistake and stomp out the problem as soon as possible. The lonely adult was telling him to confess his feelings and admit that it was certainly not a problem. His inner child was telling him to play like it hadn't happened at all. Severus Snape had never been more confused by himself.
Finally, as he opened the drawer in which he had carefully placed the glasses the previous night, Snape decided he would not be the one to bring it up.
"Ah...here they are." He sat down as he handed the glasses to their owner, who didn't put them on. "I dare say you had trouble without them...good day."
He sat down in his chair and took up his grading quill, tensed until he heard his office door close.
"Not really," Harry replied.
Snape looked up. "Still here, are you?"
Harry didn't reply, but took a seat. "My eyesight isn't all that bad."
'He's sitting down,' Snape informed himself. 'Why is he sitting down?'
"The biggest problem I have is not being able to see the writing on boards...or knowing who's saying hi to me down the hall," Harry continued.
"I see," Snape replied. Was this supposed to be small talk?
"I wanted to talk to you," Harry said.
'Shit.'
"About yesterday." Harry nervously ran his fingers through his hair.
"Yes?" Snape cursed himself for not being able to say something more, whether it be an explanation or sarcasm.
"I'm sorry, first of all, for running out on you...and out on detention as well."
Snape took a moment to think about this before replying. He decided to bite the bullet. "I understood perfectly why you ran out. No apology is needed."
Harry gave him a small smile. "Good. Thank you. Okay, I also wanted to make sure that...that you haven't been lying to me the whole year. Ron and Hermione are sure that you were trying to set me up. But I don't believe that. Of course, I really don't know one way or the other. I just think you're a better person than that."
'Ouch...'
Snape stood and took up pacing behind his desk while formulating an answer that didn't make him feel foolish, although every thought that came to mind made him feel such. But he had to say something.
"I have to tell you, and please let me finish, that my original intent was to...well, frankly, to crush you. I was being immature and vengeful for something that isn't even your fault. And please bear in mind that it is taking all of my being to admit this to you. I am trusting in the maturity I know you have to not use this display of weakness to your...advantage."
"I don't think it's weak," Harry replied. "A man must be strong to admit that he has been mistaken."
"Thank you, Mr. Potter." Snape looked him directly in the eyes, and Harry could see that the thanks was genuine.
"But then you have been lying to me, the whole year," Harry said, lowering his eyes to hide his disappointment. Snape stopped pacing and placed his hands on the back of his chair.
'I can't believe I'm doing this.'
"No. I have never lied to you. I have only lied to myself. The feelings I expressed to you this past year, and those I displayed yesterday, were true, as inappropriate as they are...which is why you ran out, no doubt. I would have if an old man had come on to me at your age." Snape straightened up and turned to look at a shelf of books. After all this, he could not face Harry. In the deepest part of his mind he was sure that the Gryffindor was laughing at his confession. He jumped when he heard Harry speak from directly behind him.
"I don't think it was inappropriate, as long as you really feel for me." Harry shuffled his feet as Snape turned around. "I ran away because I was confused. I've had this odd crush on you for a while...well, you know that, I told you. And at the same time, I was falling for some person that I didn't even know in real life. Can you imagine how surprising it was to find that you and he were the same person?"
"I hadn't thought on it," Snape replied. Harry stood taller, prouder.
"I had a long time to think about it last night while everyone was sleeping. I told them I wanted to be alone. I didn't want to talk to them about it. And as the minutes went by, I realized it was because the only person I wanted to talk to about it was TheMaster... you."
Snape's features were as emotionless as ever, but Harry could see something different in his eyes. It encouraged him to continue.
"I may be a student here, and there may be an age difference between us, but I don't think that matters. Legally, I'm of age. Emotionally, I feel too old for men who are even five years older than me. They don't know what it's like...what it's like to go through-"
"What it's like to go through hell," Snape finished for him.
"We understand each other, I think," Harry said, holding Snape's gaze firmly in his own. "Am I wrong?"
"No."
"Then nothing we do together could ever be inappropriate," Harry said, moving forward to put his hand against Snape's chest. Snape wanted Harry's gentle touch more than anything, but suddenly, something in him recoiled and the persona he'd built up for years lashed out.
"I don't know what you think you're doing, Mr. Potter."
"Excuse me?" Harry's hand stopped in mid air and then fell to his side.
"I don't know what you expect from me. I don't have time for a relationship with anyone, let alone a spoilt, bigheaded brat like you. I've been doing just fine on my own and it's going to remain that way. The only person I can trust is me." Snape's face was contorted with anger, although Harry couldn't tell whom it was directed at. His own eyes became dark with frustration.
"You were the one who refused to reveal your identity. I told you everything the whole time. I was always honest. I trusted you with a secret that if revealed could make my life more hellish than it already is! And on top of all that, you were the one who came on to me yesterday, if you've quite forgotten."
Snape looked livid now. "And you plan on pressing charges then, do you?"
"No!"
"Well then?"
"What's the matter with you? I thought you cared... Why would you have sent me this pendant if you didn't? It's obvious that I mean something. You wouldn't have sent it if I didn't..."
"I-"
"I'm not finished," Harry spat out. Snape closed his mouth, taken aback. "Minutes ago, you were confessing real feelings to me. REAL feelings. And now you're accusing and mean spirited. It's all a mask and I can see through it now. You're afraid. Your whole life you've been afraid. You're just a sad, lonely man."
There was a long silence, the two men glaring at each other with confused anger. After a moment, Snape turned his eyes down. Harry's anger melted away as he realized the potion master was defeated. He immediately regretted his words.
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean-"
"No, Mr. Potter," Snape said, turning his eyes to look out the window. "You are perfectly correct."
"Look, I was angry. I didn't mean what I said...and I don't think you mean what you said either. I like you a lot. I want a chance to know you better."
"Apparently, you know me better than I know myself."
Harry knew what needed to be done. He reached a hand out to Snape's face and turned the man's head to look him in the eyes.
"I would never use anything you say against you. I want you to trust me," Harry said, taking a step forward. Snape took a step backward without realizing it and bumped into his bookcase.
"Mr. P-"
"Call me, Harry. I like it."
Snape felt as if some unearthly force was pulling his face toward the young man in front of him. Harry tilted his face up to look directly into Snape's eyes.
"Harry..."
"It's nice to finally meet you in person," he said. The next moment he couldn't have torn his lips away from the professor's even if he had wanted to. Severus Snape wasn't going to let him.
One hand wrapped firmly around Harry's waist and the other was digging through his hair. Harry's hand was caught between their bodies but he didn't notice, nor would he have cared. His other hand was pressed into the back muscles below Snape's shoulder blades, his fingers digging into the flesh through the robes and shirt.
Snape's tongue was running along Harry's bottom lip, darting in and out of the sweet mouth, battling with another tongue. He trailed bites and kisses down the smooth neck until he reached the collarbone. The sound of heavy breathing was filling the room, intoxicating Snape's senses. Again, he walked Harry backwards to press him against the desk, asserting his dominant position. His mouth broke contact as he pushed Harry back into a stack of papers. Normally he might have minded, but all he could see at that moment was Harry.
"You want me," he proclaimed as he pressed his hips against the young man's.
Harry looked up at him through heavy lidded eyes. "I want you."
Snape leaned over and rubbed his bulge against Harry's own growing erection. Harry's breath caught. He reached up and fumbled with the robes, allowing them to slide off Snape's shoulders. He could hear the heavy fabric hit the floor. Now Snape was wearing a black button up shirt and slacks.
"Boy, do I want you," he gritted out, pulling the man down on top of him. They were grinding their hips together with more intensity, gripping flesh, biting. Harry wrapped his legs around Snape's waist to bring them even closer together.
"You need me," Snape growled and continued to bite at Harry's neck.
"I need you. I have to see you. I have to have you."
With all his strength, Harry pushed Snape off of him and slithered from the desk to the floor. He kneeled in front of the panting man as if lowering himself before a king...a master. His hands reached out to Snape's belt and loosed it, pulling it out of the loops and to the floor. Snape could only watch as the beautiful creature knelt before him. Harry then unfastened the buttons on the slacks and pulled them open. An erection was straining against Snape's underwear. Harry threw his arms around Snape's legs and nuzzled the bulge. Gasps were coming from above and Harry smiled.
"I want to please you. I want your cock in my mouth," he said. "If you'll allow it."
Snape gazed down at Harry, who was licking his lips suggestively. "I would desire nothing more..."
Harry's hands eagerly moved to the waistband of the underwear and he started to tug them down when Snape's hands grabbed his and stayed them.
"I would desire nothing more, but I would like to wait."
Harry looked up at Snape with disappointment. The professor pulled the underwear back into place and knelt so he could look straight into Harry's face.
"There is nothing more arousing than thinking of you giving me pleasure right now, but I'm using every ounce of my will power to stop you."
"I thought you wanted this," Harry said.
"I do. Believe me, I do. But not right here, and not yet. We've talked the whole year, but whereas I've known it was you the whole time, you just found out who I am. I want you to be sure. And...I'd also like you to not be a student of mine anymore. I can't help feeling like I'm taking advantage, even if you are willing."
Harry sighed and fell forward against Snape's chest. The other man wrapped his arms around him.
"I suppose I wouldn't want you to get into trouble either," Harry said, "But this is going to be very hard."
"Tell me about it," Snape said. They caught each other's eyes and both started to bite their lips to contain their laughter.
"Cheeky," Harry said, mimicking the other.
Snape smiled, but his face was serious. "Look. I'm not an easy person to get along with, much less have a relationship with. You've seen it...I lash out. I'm not telling you to bugger off, I'm just warning you."
"I lash out, too," Harry said. "Despite my Golden Boy image, I'm not perfect. No one is. I'm willing to work for a relationship."
"I have a demanding job. And a demanding spying job."
"I have a demanding life," Harry replied. Snape snorted at this, but not to be rude. Harry knew he'd won. Snape allowed him to stand, and then rearranged himself, retrieved his belt and picked up his robe. When the potion master was finished, Harry leaned against him and put his arms around his waist.
"What can we do if you aren't going to shag me on your desk," he asked looking up at the other with faux innocence. Snape shook his head.
"Lustful brat. I suppose, as long as it's in secret, we can do this," he answered leaning down and capturing Harry's lips. "And this," he said against Harry's neck, nipping him below the ear.
"How about this," Harry said, grabbing at Snape's arse. Snape growled in response. "I suppose that means yes."
Snape pulled the Gryffindor's hands away from his hind region and placed them somewhere safer. "If you stay any longer I'm afraid I won't be able to contain myself. If you aren't careful, you might find yourself shagged right and proper."
Harry smirked and brushed his hips against Snape's. "Are you sure we can't..."
Snape pushed Harry's hips away.
"We are going to wait," he said firmly.
Harry smiled coyly and walked around to the front of the desk to retrieve his glasses. Snape watched as he made his was to the door. As he turned the handle, Harry looked back.
"Your word is my command...master."
THE END! NO! Don't throw that at me! Stop! Stop with the tomatoes and cabbage! No, not the lettuce! ...of course now I could have a nice salad.
Now, as I said earlier this is the end of this particular plot line but I'm very prepared to write a much juicier sequel. So save your fruits and veggies for a bunny rabbit because all it takes is a few requests to continue with a new fic about them having a relationship (and yes, that involves shagging), and bam! Your wish is my command. I really hope you enjoyed my fic and I hope you would like to see more from me :)
HUGS!!!!!!! KISSES!
Dav
NEW AUTHOR'S NOTE (thanks Lady Lynn for the warning!)
Hello everyone! I just wanted to thank you all for your continued reviews and say that I am working on a follow up and the other fic, Adventures in Life Drawing. I'm currently on vacation in another country, but I shall return with some goodies for you all. Right now my fic is in a competition, so please vote for me! I can't post the link here, but I'll put it in my information.
Thanks everyone!
Kisses to all,
Dav