Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist

It is during the night. Most times, it is during the night and whenever it is raining. And it is during the dark quiet nights after a bad nightmare when he can't help but tremble, weakness and helplessness and poison filling his mind and he looks down at his hands, sweaty and shaky and so small. He looks at them and wants to scream, to curse, to cry at the inability to reach his brother that stormy night.

He looks at them and breathes. It is during these nights when he clenches his hands and heads to the bathroom, Al's worried voice in the background and a quiet 'I'm okay, Al.'

Then he looks in the mirror and breathes.

Staring back at him is a small body, a youthful face with no hard lines and golden eyes full of fear.

Staring back at him is messy hair, beads of sweat rolling down a face and frantic eyes.

Staring back at him is a child, small and weak, a crumbling mess of failures and hands that can only destroy.

He looks in the mirror and breathes.

Staring back at him is his own reflection and Ed hates this little child all the more.

A/N: School! Finally! Ended! I'm freeeeeeeee! And also Ed decided he wants attention and then my 1 am brain decided to take Ed's hate of being called and treated as a child and turn it into angst. Typical.