Disclaimer: I do not own any character of (The Last of Us) TLOU is owned by Naughty Dog and their creators.

Warning: This story is going to be rated T for the languishing and underage situation. I make some changes in the first part is not going to be any graphic sex between Ellie and Joel in this part. The story is going to move more to the drama, but it will still have romance in it. I may add later a chapter that contains sex but that will depend on the people that ask for it and is going to be posted apart of the main story. As this story is about a 16 years old girl, falling in love with a 40 years old man, this story isn't going to be for kids. Just read it if you're an adult over 18 years old. Thank you for and stay safe out there.

A/N: Hello again. I wanted to thank you for the great welcome people give to the first part of this story. I know that in the end maybe it was not what you expected, but as I make some changes in the story it makes me make it longer. So as I was going to add more chapters to it, I decided to make a second part. This part is going to have 25 chapters so it is going to be a little longer than the first one. Also, I want to thanks to the person that help me to edit this chapter, he does a great job on it, so thank you.

The first chapters are going to be a little sad as you saw at the end of the first part Joel is gone. But don't worry it going to become better as the story moves forward. I hope you like this part as much you love the first one and I hope that the people that follow the first one get back for the second. I going to be more drama and more romance in this one, so I hope you like it. Remember don't forget to put any comment or review on it, I always appreciate those. Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoy the story as much I enjoy writing it. Thank you.

Winter

Chapter 1: Back to the Beginning

"Are you fucking kidding me? You have been lying on the couch all day drinking again?!" Joel's wife said as soon as she entered the house. She started to kick the empty beer cans that were all over the living room until she got in front of him. "Joel, it's been nine months. I know this is hard for you, but you need to move on. You need to get your life back on track and get a new job. Our savings are almost gone and I don't make enough to continue living like this."

Joel looked at her with fury in his eyes. "Do you think that I'm going to forget that easy? Our daughter is dead and you… you don't even shed a tear for her." Joel stood up from the chair and threw the beer can that he had in his hand to the wall.

"Do you think this is not hard for me too? I cried my heart out when she passed away. She was my daughter too, you know! But the time for helpless grief and sorrow is over and we need to continue surviving. There is nothing that we can do to change the past, but we can move on and-"

Joel turns around and looks at her. "Yeah… this must be easier for you, huh? since I discovered that you didn't want to have children anyway." he said as he watched her utter shock unravel in front of him. "Yeah, that's right. Did you think I would never find out?"

His wife turned around and walked towards the kitchen. "I don't know what you are talking about. I loved our daughter as much as you did, even if we didn't have the chance to really have her."

Joel hastily followed her and grabbed her by the arm and turned her around. "Oh yeah, then why were you taking this?" He showed her a little plastic bottle with some pills in it. "I checked this with a doctor and he told me that it was used to prevent pregnancy."

His wife grabs the pill bottle out of his hand. "Are you checking my things now?"

"Oh, so you're not denying that you're taking this?"

"No, I am not. Anyhow, that was before I got pregnant and that has got nothing to do with what happened," said Tess, shaking Joel's hand away from her.

"Well, I asked the doctor and he said it could have," he said with a furious tone.

His wife turns around and walks away. "You're drunk Joel, so you don't know what you're saying."

Joel walks after her. "I'm saying that this could have something to do with our daughter's condition. I may be drunk, but I'm not stupid. You've used this behind my back and now our daughter is dead."

She turns around and holds the bottle right in front of his face. "You really think this has something to do with our daughter's death?!" said Tess, as she rolled her eyes. "Yes… I used them before because I didn't want to have any kids back then, at least not for a while" She lowered her hand and looked down in a strange combination of melancholy and regret. "But I never meant for this to happen and you!… you're just looking for a scapegoat, and I sure as hell won't let that be me!" She threw the bottle at Joel and walked towards the bedroom, promptly smashing the door shut behind her.

Joel looked at the bottle for a moment, then he threw it in the trash. After a few minutes, Joel thinks of going to the bedroom to let her know that nothing is going to make his pain go away. Just before he heads there, he took a step back and looked around the mess of a house the two of them have. So what's the point of moving on after all? He would be in denial to avoid the fact that his marriage was over before the pregnancy anyway. He was only hoping that their daughter would turn things around and give them both a fresh start. The weight of the realization brought Joel down on his knee. as he held his head to stop himself from collapsing. Maybe Tess was right; and all of this was my fault. I should have paid more attention to my family than to my work.

Feeling the onset of another episode of an existential crisis, Joel opened his eyes and looked faintly at the ceiling. For a moment, he could not remember where he was anymore, so he just closed his eyes again hoping it would all be a dream. '' Why can life be so cruel? Why am I still here if there is nothing out there for me?'' Surely, he felt that he lost all-purpose and meaning to his life at this point. ''She was right. I was just a poor bastard that destroyed anything and anyone close to me with my own hands''. Joel opened his eyes again as he sat on the edge of the bed. ''I just want to die and put an end to all this'' Joel lowered his head in disappointment and looked at the floor. '' I'm so sorry Sarah… I just can't do this anymore. I just want the pain to go away… and to stop hurting the people I care about.''

"You don't need to die to stop the pain… Joel. There are people that are willing to help you get through this."

Joel shot up his head when he felt a hand on his shoulder. "Ellie!?"

"You can change… Joel! You can be happy if you just let people in and accept what you can't control."

Joel wished it to be Ellie right there behind him, but when he turned his head around, there was nobody there. "Ellie, is it you?" He grabbed his head and shook it roughly.'' God damn it, I am really starting to lose it.'' "This is not real … I only hear your voice in my mind. Guess this is my punishment for hurting you too? I am a bad man and I ain't it Ellie, why do you still try to help me?"

"I never thought that you're a bad person Joel. Yes… you hurt me when you left me behind. But I still love you… Joel and I don't want you to be alone and sad again."

"Why not? I am just a fucking failure that never does anything right. I always hurt the people that I care most about, so what is the point of continuing to live like this?"

"Because you're not lost. There is still hope for you. You still have people that love you. You made it this far for a reason. So the only thing holding you back is your stubbornness, you need to let yourself be happy again, you must let her go and see what is right in front of you."

"And what is that?" Joel asked while groggily looking around.

"Me!" Joel opened his eyes when he hears someone knock at the door rather intensely. He sat on the bed and looked around. ''Shit... it was just a fucking nightmare… again.''

The man behind the door continued to knock. "I know you're in there mister… so open the damn door already. You're late on the payment again, so I want my money right now."

Joel looks at the door with complete dismay to the audacity of this man knocking at his door this early. Yeah, he owes him the rent for this week, but he was getting ion his nerves right now. Joel cleared his head and quickly got up. He doesn't know why, but he always hears Ellie's whenever he has a nightmare. The man, however, did not allow him this rare moment of introspection as he continued knocking at the door which aggravated Joel even more. "I am coming. so hold your damn horses... asshole."

Joel was staying in a motel room in Texas. After he arrived there, he wanted to contact his brother, but still couldn't find the courage to do it. He still had some money from his savings, but he needed to find a stable job soon. He has been doing a few things here and there, not finding a permanent job yet. He did not really want to come back to Texas again, but he didn't know where else to go.

( Three months early )

After Joel left his house in Minnesota. He had no idea where he was heading off to. He just drove on the road without any destination or any plan. He was sorry to leave Ellie behind like that, but he did not really have a choice, as it was the right thing to do. Yes, she will be hurt at first, but surely it will pass with time. Sure, he is going to miss her very much, but it was for the best. Ellie was only 16 and what he started to feel for her, was just wrong.

Joel drove for hours until the night started to fall and he started to get tired. So after a while, he looked for a place to rest and think about what to do next. Soon enough, he crossed the border with the state of Nebraska, as he started to look for a place to pass the night. After a little while, he found a motel close to the USA # 29 road and decided to stop there. The Motel was called Ramada in the center of South Sioux City.

Joel quickly parked his pick-up truck in one of the parking spaces there. It was already late at night so he just wanted to rent a room and get some rest. After a few minutes of sitting in his truck, Joel finally opened the door and got out. He looked around and only saw a few cars, so he was confident that the place had to have some empty rooms. So, he walked towards the reception area and got in.

The lobby wasn't big, just a few chairs there and some vending machines. Typical of such motels. He was lucky that there were no people there because he really was not in the mood to socialize right now. He walked over to the counter where an Indian guy was checking something on his computer. As Soon the man saw Joel, he left what he was doing and looked at him.

"Welcome to the Ramada Hotel," the man said with a smile on his face. "Are you looking for a room? If you are, I can assure you that you have come to the best mot-"

"Yeah, yeah… I don't need to hear your promotion, just give me a room… alright?" said Joel, interrupting him.

The man was taken aback and looked at him in shock, but did not respond to his rude comments and interruption. "Sure… not a social butterfly, I guess?" the man turns to his computer and starts looking for a room. "So, you're going to stay for a few days or just for a night?"

"Just for a night."

"Okay," he was taping on his computer. "Do you have any preference; like no smoking area or-"

"Just give me a room, I am not going to stay long so I don't really care."

"Okay… okay, don't need to be so rude… Can you give me your name?"

"Joel… Joel Miller."

"Are you going to pay in cash or credit?"

"Cash."

"Okay… the cost for a night is $61. 35 with taxes and your room is going to be number # 12 sir."

Joel takes his money out and pays the guy. He gave him a paper with instructions and the phone number of the reception in case he needed anything, then he gave him the key. After that was finished, Joel went back to his truck and got out one of his bags and a few things. He didn't bring much with him and left the rest of his stuff back in the house. He couldn't bring everything with him, so he needs to find out how he will get all his belongings once he settles somewhere else

As soon Joel finds the room, he went in quickly and closed the door. The room had two single beds, but he only needed one, so he drops his bag on top of the one closer to the door. Then he goes to the other one and lays down. He needs to think about what to do next and where to go, but right now he just needs to get some sleep and forget what happened in the last few days, and the last few months for that matter.

( A few hours back with Ellie )

After Ellie read the letter, she drove down on her knees and started to cry. She didn't understand why he left her like that. If he has a problem with what happened with the kiss, he just needs to talk to her about it. After a few minutes, she gets up from the floor and takes out her phone. She didn't come to his house for more than two weeks, so she doesn't know how long he has been gone. Maybe she just misses him and he can still close, so she can contact him and convince him to come back and talk. She knew that they can resolve all this if they just talk.

Ellie looked at her contact for Joel's number and soon she found it, she pressed the button to call him. Ellie left the phone ringing until she heard the message saying that the person she was calling was not available. I don't get why he turned off his phone? She said with a sad tone. Ellie doesn't know what to do, so she starts to look around the house looking for any clue of where Joel may go. She looked at the fireplace and saw the pictures that Joel has there. He didn't take any of the pictures with him and a lot of his things are still in the house, so maybe it still hoped that he would come back.

Ellie walks to his room and checks the closet. Half of his clothes were gone, but there are still some there. Also, Ellie saw a few of the boxes he had in his room where they were still there, so it looks like he just packed a few things and went in a hurry, but why? Yeah, he said in the note that he had to go because what happened was wrong. But if he has gone forever why has he left almost all his things here?

After a few minutes, Ellie looks at the bed and starts to remember the day she took his album and makes him chase her around the house until they end up on the bed. Ellie moves to the bed and lay down. She grabs Joel's pillow and hugs it closer to her. Oh… Joel why you have to do this… Ellie closes her eyes and bares her face on the pillow and starts to cry again.

( A few hours later )

Ellie opens her eyes when she hears her phone ringing. She let go of Joel's pillow and sat up on the bed and looked for her phone. Shit… I must fall asleep… The phone stopped ringing, but she could look at and see who was calling and called back. Where is the fucking phone? It can be Joel returning my call. Ellie moved out of the bed and saw the phone on top of one of the boxes there. So she ran to where it was and grabbed it. She was excited to see if it was him, but her expression changed when she saw the name of the person who called.

It was her aunt, the last person she wanted to talk to right now. So she didn't answer the call and went back to the bed and laid down. Her aunt was out of town, so she was probably calling to check on her. Ellie grabs the pillow and smells it. It still smells like him, so she closes her eyes and starts to think about him.

"What do you think of the view? It's great right?"

"Yeah, you're right, this place is great."

"It's too bad that people don't appreciate places like this around here. But in a way, that is good for me."

"Why?."

"Because I can come here without people bothering me. I like to come here alone and lose myself, but now I'm happy to share all this with you."

"I'm sure you will be happy to share this when you get more friends"

"I don't need more friends…if I have you."

"Ellie… you should think of finding new friends. I'm glad you want to be my friend, but you need to be with kids your age."

"I don't need anyone else… but let's not talk about that and let's just enjoy the day. Now take this and pass it on my back, I don't want to get a sunburn."

Ellie hugs the pillow tight and starts crying again. She was never going to forget that weekend, it was the best thing that had happened to her in a long time. She could have had more days like that, but now it is too late. Joel is gone and it was her fault. If she didn't kiss him that day or tell him that she loves him, he would probably still be here right now.

( Back to Joel )

Joel was in his motel room laying on the bed and looking at the ceiling. It's been a few hours since he was there, but even though he was trying to get some sleep, he couldn't do it. He was trying to not think of Ellie, but every time he closed his eyes he saw her beautiful face. It was happening again, just like when he lost his little girl. He thought that by going to that house, he will bury his pain and try to start over. But it seems like his past is never going to let him be in peace. And now he has to add another loss to his heart-wrenching collection.

After a few hours, he finally fell asleep, but his nightmares never let him rest completely. So the next day he grabs his things and gets back on the road. He doesn't have too many friends to count on, or a home to go to for that matter. So he doesn't know where to head to right now. The only thing he knows now is that he needs to find a new place to live and get a job. Because the money he has left is not going to last forever. So he continues driving until he gets to the next state and sees if he can figure out what to do next.

On the road, he remembered his friend Bill. He has a car workshop in Arizona, maybe he can give him a call and ask for his help. But he would probably hang up as soon as he heard his voice. The last time they spoke, it did not end well. But what else can he do? Some of the rest of his friends were dead by now or he lost contact with them. The other option is his brother, but that will be worse than Bill. After a few more hours he saw the sign on the side of the road that said; Welcome to Kansas. There is nothing he can do there, but it was getting late and he needed a place to rest, or at least try.

So after he arrived in the town of Concordia, he looked for the cheap motel there and rented a room. But this time he will stay a few days and think about what to do next. After he gets his room, he needs to go out and buy another phone. Because the one he has before he threw it out of the window as soon as he left Minnesota. Because the last thing he needs right now is for Ellie to call him or any of the people that have his number back in that town. He needs to disappear for a while and try to start over again. He can rent the house and get some money for it, but that means to go back there and he can't do that. So he probably will have to sell it, if he needs the money. So after he gets inside the room with his belongings, he goes out and looks for a store where he can buy another phone.

A/N: Also I want to add that this story and the other ones I write are just fantasy fiction stories. There situations and other things that are not real or possible in the real world. And also doesn't mean that I approve that situation in real life. They're going to be part of this story that they never going to happen in the real world so they only going to be here as part of the story. A lot of people like the first part so I hope you like this one too. so happy reading ad doesn't forget to put any comment at the end. Also if anyone wants to do more stories like this LMK of if you prefer more like the game story LMK too. Thanks again and stay safe out there.