A member of Bravo is killed on a mission, and it tears the team apart. When they discover there's been a horrible mistake and their brother is actually alive, can they come back together in time to save their friend? And will he ever be the same?

This story includes the long term physical and sexual abuse/rape of one of our main characters while in captivity. Though it isn't graphic, it clearly happens (chapter 6) and is a very prominent part of the story, along with its aftermath. If you'd like more info before continuing, feel free to shoot me a message.

There are currently 14 chapters and it will land just shy of 20. Previously posted at AO3.

Have you ever felt like nobody was there?
Have you ever felt forgotten in the middle of nowhere?
Have you ever felt like you could disappear?
Like you could fall and no one would hear?
"You Will Be Found" - Dear Evan Hansen

#####

"Shut the fuck up, Brock."

Trent looks up in time to see Brock stumble back from Sonny as if he's been physically pushed, tripping over an open equipment case on the floor in the process and nearly face planting to the trailer's dingy brown carpet.

A bright pink flush creeps up Brock's neck to his face, and there's a beat where Trent thinks he may actually punch the other man. Instead, he turns with hunched shoulders and leaves the room, letting out a quiet "Screw you, Sonny" on his way out the door.

Cerberus stays put just long enough to vibrate with a low, menacing snarl before stalking over to his favorite tennis ball, picking it up and following his handler out of their quarters.

"Was that really necessary?" Ray looks up from the paperback he's reading in the old double wide's corner hammock. Trying to read, anyway. Trent's pretty sure he hasn't turned the page for at least the last 15 minutes. After all, it's hard to concentrate when your whole team is squabbling incessantly around you.

"The man needs to know he's on the wrong side here, Ray. Captain America and Iron Man would absolutely clean the floor with Batman and Superman. It's not even a contest."

"Who cares?" Ray booms at Sonny incredulously. "Seriously, grow up!"

The room is stunned into quiet before Ray lowers his voice. "I swear, some days I feel like I'm working with children. Jameelah and RJ have more intelligent conversations, and RJ can't even manage to put the right shoe on each foot."

Trent can't help but crack a grin as he hears Clay chuckle from where he's perched on the table in front of him. "Sonny still uses Velcro," the younger man says in an exaggerated whisper.

Sonny just glares and growls and turns back to the TV.

Trent isn't sure he's ever been more desperate to get the go ahead for a mission. He loves his brothers on Bravo team dearly, but if they sit around waiting any longer, he's afraid they're going to start causing actual bodily harm to one another.

They're in Thailand to take down a sex trafficking operation controlled by a government leader suspected of fomenting terror abroad. Intelligence shows he's using the profits from the "business" to strengthen his position and recruit followers.

They expected this to be a quick spin up, three or four days max, but they've been here for two weeks already. And they haven't done a damn thing. According to Mandy, it's all about finding the "right window of opportunity" to go in. And that window hasn't presented itself yet.

So they wait.

The stress isn't helped by the fact that this is a joint op with Charlie team. Jason has been on edge since they got here, his dislike and distrust of Beau Fuller on open display.

That unease has trickled down through both teams. Nerves are frayed and raw, and the simmering tension in the air is palpable.

Fortunately, the two teams are bunking in separate trailers and they won't actually be together for the bulk of the op. Trent will take the win where he can get it.

The mission itself is actually fairly run-of-the-mill. Not risk free, but nearly.

Almost by definition, everything DEVGRU does is dangerous, but relatively speaking, this op should be a piece of cake. A pretty straightforward in and out while the "bad guys" are off site. Charlie team will take down the perpetrators, while Bravo rescues the trafficking victims.

And that rescue can't come soon enough. The men of Bravo team are exhausted mentally and physically. They've been run ragged lately, and they're looking forward to getting the job done and going home.

Trent turns his attention back to Clay, palpating his knee.

"Does it hurt all the time or only when you put weight on it?"

"Mostly with weight," Clay replies sheepishly, wincing a little. "Kind of throbby the rest of the time."

The younger man sounds embarrassed, and rightly so. He tweaked his knee the previous day while killing time by sprinting laps with Cerberus, insisting he could outrun the hair missile.

He couldn't, of course.

But that didn't stop him from trying until he ate dirt in a dramatic tangle of arms and legs, twisting his knee on the way down.

The stupidity from Clay, of all people, hammers home to Trent how important it is to keep a group like this – full of Alpha-male, type-A, highly-driven operators – busy and productive. Sitting around isn't doing anyone any good.

They really, really need to get going on this mission before someone ends up permanently maimed or dead.

But even more, they just need a break. A break from the monotony of waiting. From the tension of the job.

And from each other.

They live in each other's pockets, and sometimes it just gets to be too much.

"I'm okay, really," Clay insists with a confidence Trent isn't sure he believes.

"I'm not hauling his heavy ass back here if he goes down while we're out there," Sonny huffs from the couch.

"No one asked you to, Sonny!" Clay shoots back.

"Fair warning, that's all," the Texan snarks. "I'm sure those sickos would be more than happy to add a pretty, blue-eyed, blonde American stud such as yourself to their collection of merchandise."

"I'm fine," Clay snaps.

"Enough!" Ray shouts, just as the door opens and Jason sticks his head in.

"We're a go," the team leader tells them, voice full of relief. "Jock up. We leave in 20."

"Oh, thank God," Ray is out of the hammock and out the door in seconds.

Jason makes his way over to Trent and Clay.

"What's the verdict?" he nods to Clay's right leg.

"It's swollen, but I don't think he did any serious damage."

"He okay to go?"

"Yes," Clay cuts in.

"Wasn't asking you, Usain Bolt," Jason smiles, with a rough bump to the kid's shoulder.

Trent knows Clay's speed is going to be hampered at least a little bit by the injury. But they're on hostage rescue, not the assault team. There shouldn't be any real need for speed. Besides, the team is already in enough turmoil as it is without the drama that would come along with benching one of them.

Jason and Clay are both looking at Trent expectantly.

"Yeah, I think he's good," he says, a bit reluctantly.

He hopes it's a decision he doesn't come to regret.