This is the end! Just a reminder that I will be posting a "missing scene" that fits right before Chapter 6. Why a missing scene? Because I have a bit of a "hurt/comfort" addiction, that's why. I might need to find a 12 step program for it.

Chapter 9 - Stretching the Metaphor

Lia woke to the weight of an arm across her midsection. Light was peaking through the blinds, but the house was quiet. Gracie must have still been asleep. Lia stroked her hand along the pale arm that covered her causing the owner of the arm to stir. She glanced over to see that James' eyes were open and watching her in amusement.

"Is this the long arm of the law I've heard about?" she asked as she took his hand and lifted it off her. But she didn't let go.

"Thank you," he said. "For letting me in last night."

"I'm glad you knew you could come here." She brought his hand up to her lips, turned it and pressed a kiss to the palm before releasing it. "You are always welcome."

Last night, they'd sat over cups of tea after James had returned Gracie to her crib. Lia had made him a sandwich and then another when he'd devoured the first. He'd looked calmer, less haunted than he had earlier and relief had washed over her. She remembered his comment about "one foot out the door" on police work and understood now what he had meant.

"I don't want you to feel that you have no choice about being a cop," she had told him last night. "We would manage if you wanted to look for something else. I hope you know we would be there with you."

"I do, actually," James had said. "I'm still not sure what I'll do in the future. Robbie said something today, though. That maybe the boy would remember me as someone who took care of him. I'm holding onto that thought for now."

"You look all done in," she had said, patting his hand. "We both should get some rest. That child wakes up early and full of energy."

James slept over from time to time when he'd relaxed with a couple of beers at dinner after the evening routine of bath and lullabies was done. He usually slept on the day bed in the nursery, which was unfortunately just a bit short for his 6 foot 3 inch frame. His long, skinny feet hung off the end.

She'd drawn him up the stairs last night. He'd seemed like a sleepwalker, moving without volition. When he started to drift to the nursery, she redirected him to her room. "You need a proper rest."

He hadn't fought her, instead stripping down to his underwear and dropping onto the end of the bed. "That poor little boy," he'd muttered. "He must have been so frightened by the sounds he was hearing and had hidden himself at the back of the closet. He leapt into my arms."

She had pulled back the coverlet and top sheet. "He knew you'd take care of him. And you did. Now, try to rest."

Lia had stretched out next to him, listening as James breathing became steady and restful. It took her longer to sleep as she thought about this man who had to steel himself everyday to do his job, and lost a little bit of himself with every tragedy he witnessed. She had seen James tear himself apart in the months since Grace's birth. And yet, he showed up every day and cared for his child.

He hadn't talked much about work during that time. She knew he'd received his promotion as everyone had expected. After all, he was brilliant and incredibly competent. Even with her limited window into his work, she knew that. The period after he became an inspector, when Robbie retired, seemed to be the darkest. It had alarmed her to see how much pain he was in, how lost he seemed. And again, he came every day.

That darkness seemed to lift a bit when Robbie came back as a contractor. After that, when she saw James he was more relaxed. He would have a plate of pasta, or an omelet with her in the evening after Grace was down for the night. James would tell her some of what happened that day, a funny story about his sergeant, something amusing Robbie had said. Occasionally, he would mention a rough case, as if by saying the words out loud made it less awful.

But last night was the first time she'd seen him so directly affected by work. Or at least it was the first time he'd reached out to her and Grace. She hadn't known how bad it had been until Robbie had talked to her and showed her the video. She'd acted entirely on instinct when she put a sleeping child into James's arms.

Would she have chosen this path for herself, she wondered. All those months ago, there had been no active decision on her part. She didn't say to herself, "this man, this is the one I want to link my life with." She'd simply enjoyed an evening with a funny, attractive guy and woke up one day in a partnership for the foreseeable future. Maybe God had a wicked sense of humor after all. She might not have chosen James, but she couldn't imagine not having him in her life.

The morning quiet was broken by Gracie's cries. "I'll get her," James said, throwing back the covers and sliding out of bed. Lia pushed herself up and stacked a couple of pillows behind her. She listened to the sound of James talking to Gracie as he changed her nappie. Grace's face was flushed with sleep, her chubby hand gripping the neck of James' vest as they entered the bedroom. He set the hungry child on the bed next to Lia.

James stretched out on his side, his head propped up on one arm. Lia unbuttoned her nightdress and looked at him as he watched his daughter nestle down and nurse. Gracie's hair was white blonde in the morning light. She was definitely her father's daughter as she was also, at eight months, in the 85th percentile for length on the growth chart.

"Have you ever thought about having more children?" he asked as Gracie finished feeding. Lia handed the baby back to him and slid back down in the bed.

"I don't know. I can't imagine having the energy to enter the dating pool at this point in my life."

James rolled his eyes. "Let me rephrase that. Have you ever thought of having more children with me?"

Lia rolled over to face him. "Honestly James, I didn't think that was something you would even consider."

He lifted Gracie above his head, to her delight. "Well, I like the one we have a lot."

"She's a keeper," Lia agreed. "Of course, there is no guarantee that another one would be as good. Could be collicky. Might not be as cute."

"Understood. I think I could live with that."

"You're serious?" Lia asked.

"I am, though my conscience just slapped me for even suggesting it. I haven't been there for you and Gracie. I have no business talking about another child. I've failed miserably, and don't even have the right to tell you how I feel."

"Haven't been there for us? By whose measure? Certainly not mine."

"I moved out. I left you with a newborn."

"And you've seen us every day. You've been here for us in every way that matters from the day I told you I was pregnant. If you want to say you love me, go ahead. If you can't, frankly it doesn't matter. Your every action for the past year and a half has said it."

"I love you," he told her over the top of their baby's head.

"I love you, too. And if you want to move in here, that's wonderful. And if you want to keep your apartment, well, it's not the most cost effective arrangement, but that's okay too."

James laughed. "I was just remembering something Robbie said to me when I first told him about the baby. He said I just had to show up. That kids were easy graders."

"Robbie is a wise man."

"So, what do you think all this means in terms of the bus stop metaphor?" James asked.

"I think we've stretched that metaphor pretty thin. But maybe now, the two people from the bus stop decided they love each other."

Note: Thank you so much for taking the time to read this far. I can't remember enjoying the writing of a story more. I left the ending a little ambiguous, because, let's face it, James is ambiguous. I think he gives up that lovely, but odd apartment, but who knows. It's James after all.

Couple of things in my head that I didn't put in the fic because they didn't quite fit. I pictured Lia sitting on the stairs whenever James sang to Gracie, out of sight so as not to intrude on a special time for him and his daughter. And I pictured Enzo and Rosemary listening too during that really tough period after he left at first. Maybe that was a way for them to understand James and not be angry with him.