Teri Teri~ Magical Girl Theresa

"What are we going to do!" A voice yelled, it being the highest one out of a screaming group of people. The scene was urgent, the situation dire. Thousands of people were flooding the bridge - destruction was all around them, Honkai beasts were crushing buildings, destroying cars, consuming and corrupting people into zombies.

"We're doomed! I can't believe this is happppeninggg!" Another woman moaned, trying to free herself from the rampage of people around her, fighting for just a moment of breath amongst the crowd who was desperately gasping for life. It seemed like everything was doomed, everything was lost, that not even a spark of light remained in this darkness.

As the chaos reigned, a small flicker of something appeared in the sky.

"Look!" A girl yelled, pointing upwards to the sky, a shape falling faster and faster towards them as it tumbled towards the earth like a powerful meteorite, ready to shatter all below.

"Another honkai beast!?" A man exclaimed, the crowd seeming to stop it's stampede for a moment to view the oncoming object.

"No! It's her!"

"Who?"

"It's Magical Girl Teri Teri!" A woman cheered, the crowd beginning to cheer louder and louder as the shape descended towards them.

Soon, the pink meteor landed on a car, smashing it to pieces, the corresponding explosion shining a beaming light onto the onlookers and Honkai beasts in front of them. From the smoke emerged a girl - still stuck in the roof of the car, her bottom firmly lodged in the altered metal.

"Uwaaaaaahhhhh~" She cried, struggling and flailing in the car. The dress she was wearing was mighty inconvenient for fighting crime, and she had not quite mastered all the skills in her skill tree.

"Oof...I'm really sorry about that car!" She yelled, waving her hands out, as even the Honkai Beasts stopped to look at one another, unsure what was going on.

Eventually though, the girl forced her way out of the car, and the silent (or laughing) crowd began to cheer, louder and louder, and Honkai beasts began to retreat a bit, backing up as a powerful pink aura displayed, beaming from the short girl.

"Gosh, what an embarrassing entrance…." The girl commented, dusting herself off and dislodging Super Sonata* from one of the headlights.

*Super Sonata is Teri's magical wand!

Though the wand was way bigger than her (She didn't request it that way, but getting these things custom made never really seems to turn out quite the way you want. You ask them for a "normal" sized wand and they send you the mega adult version…) she dislodged it with ease, the pink aura surrounding it, her bunny ears flopping from the momentum.

The girl adjusted her crown a bit on her head, primping her pink dress and getting her wand into combat position, twirling it around in her hands, wielding it with skill that belied her short stature and funny way of talking.

"Now! For my intro!"

It seemed like a spotlight beamed from nowhere, shining on the girl as she struck a comical pose, her aura becoming stronger and stronger, her feet digging into the pavement of the destroyed city.

"I'm the defender of justice, the doer of what's right!"

She crossed the wand.

"I'm the cute girl who keeps the baddies up at night!"

She put a salute on her head and stuck her tongue out.

"I'm the upholder of good, as sweet as cherry! A magical fairy, defender Teri Teri Teri~~~"

The spotlight left, and Theresa bonked her head cutely for one good measure.

"Oh my god." One of the crowd commented. "She's so frickin' adorable!"

"Hahah, you know that's right buddy!" Theresa said, taking a moment out of the drama by pointing a finger at him.

"But hey, don't go buying those weird daki's or anything. Or I'm coming for you next!"

It was in these moments that Theresa definitely didn't seem like a heroine - or her age. As she invoked fear on the bystander (more than the Honkai beasts even) she turned her attention back to the fight, twirling Super Sonata in her hands.

"Alright you foul Honkai scum! Feel the wrath of a sugar sweet whoopin!"

With that, Teri flew into the air, twirling her wand with skill and cutting through hoards of Honkai, the blazing pink energy raining from her wand as she did so. She soared up into the sky and paused, looking down at the bests, her smile smug.

"Take this! Super Sugar Rainbow Requiieeeemm!"

Teri pointed the wand, blasting out a tremendous amount of pink energy, the sugar sweet rhapsody inflaming the Honkai Beasts below, the fire erupting and destroying them. With only a few left, she intended to soar to the ground and finish them quickly, but she could feel her power waning.

"Uh...uwawawawwaa!" At that moment she fell from the sky, crashing onto a ruined car below and rolling off like a flopping fish. She comically emerged a moment later, a huge lump on her head.

"Oof...I forgot to drink my mana potion…." She said wearily, toasting a glass to the crowd, some of whom had skeptical looks.

"Are you sure she's right in the head?" One woman commented, nudging another man in the gut with her elbow.

"Uhhh, well, she's all we've got." He commented, shrugging.

"Fair point."

Teri overheard them and sipped her mana potion, a vein popping from her head.

"I swear to god. I'm gonna punch Grandpa Otto when he hears about the malfunctions of this battlesuit! Ugh!"

Due to her lack of attention, a Honkai beast had come over her shoulder.

"Tell me something." Teri said, calmly speaking to the Honkai beast as if it was her friend.

Honkai beasts, of course, cannot speak, so the floating monster just stopped and paused, making a grunt.

"Do you feel…."

A long pause between them, Teri's eyes wincing as the vein in her head got larger and larger.

"PAIN!?"

CRUSH.

Teri bonked the Honkai beast over the head with her wand, turning it into ash in an instant.

"Hue hue hue hue~~!"

Teri dusted herself off and emerged from the car, holding her want in the air.

Soon the other Honkai beasts retreated, whether it was from fear of Teri, her attitude, or general disgust they were defeated by someone so goofy, no one will ever know. Either way, they'd retreated, and it seemed like Theresa had saved the day once again.

Soon the crowd began to cheer, and Teri's eyes widened as they began to stampede the other way towards her.

"Oh my GOD!" She said, attempting to run, but it was too late. She'd been picked up at the crowd like she'd been moshing at the death metal concert she visited with Himeko a few months back.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhh!"

"Teri - Teri - Teri - Teri!" The crowd shouted, carrying her off past the bridge and away from the fight. After a few moments, Theresa eased into it and began to feel good about herself. She laid back on the crowd, allowing them to carry her over the bridge and through the ruins of the city.

"Ooooooh, I'm happy to help! Hue hue~" Teri said, snickering as she signed another autograph, the crowd beginning to slowly disperse.

She truly loved the fans. Otto had always told her that this was her destiny - fighting the Honkai, achieving glory, making a name for herself. She felt so happy to be a magical girl - even if she was a little new at it and, much to her chagrin, maybe a little old for it too. As she finished signing things (to include a babies forehead) another figure appeared in front of her and handed her a white sheet of paper to sign.

"Oh~ Another autograph from a faithfu-"

"This is the ticket for you wrecking my fricking car!"

A huge sweatdrop slid down Theresa's face.

"Ahaha…."

She paused, looking up at the face of the angry man.

"Erm, you see what had happened was…."

The man leaned closer, and Theresa became more nervous.

"OMG! Look! It's the Vodka Twins! They've come to town!"

"Huh?"

The man turned around for just a second, and with that, Teri was gone.

"Grrr! You good for nothing hero!" The man yelled, shaking his fist into the sky.

The day was saved by Theresa Apocalypse - maybe.

"HAHAHAHAAH!" The laugh bellowed as the drink slammed down on the counter, the baritone, husky voice of the woman leaning over to clutch her sides.

"Why am I not surprised that you fell ass first into a car!" The woman clutched her sides some more, leaning back and tipping the glass up into the sky, her face contorting, her nostrils snorting, her body shaking.

"Oh, shut up Himeko!" Theresa said, crossing her arms.

"Grandpa didn't tell me that the suit still had some things to work out on it! That's why I fell into that car! And the guy wanted me to pay tooo….but I'm flat broke (TvT)..."

Himeko paused her laughter and sighed.

"Two things. One, you shouldn't trust a word Otto says to you. I think you know that."

She snickered.

"Two, you'd have money if you didn't spend it all on those stupid gacha games! Hahah!"

Teri glared, her veins popping in her head, her arms flailing to the side like a little girl. It was only them in this bar, so they were free to act however they wanted, and she wasn't going to let Himeko do all the teasing.

"Bah! And you'd have some too if you stop drinking so much!"

"Grrrrr you little brat!" Himeko growled, grabbing Theresa's head to put her into a noogie.

"Ahhhhh let me gooooo~" Theresa whined, jabbing Himeko in the ribs.

"Fine, fine~" She commented, letting Theresa go and picking back up her drink.

"So?"

Theresa shrugged, fixing the crown on her head, as it was displaced by Himeko's rough handling. She snorted, crossing her arms.

"Well, I think you are right. There are tons of things Otto doesn't tell me. Still, we've got a great chance to save this city from Honkai. There aren't any other Valkyries here but you and I though so…."

"Nahhhh Teri. Don't be so hard on yourself. You always try to keep that man in check, and for as much as I hate him, he does care for your well being. He just does things in his own way is all."

Teri nodded, her short stature looking up at Himeko.

"Meh. Let me get a shot of that. It's gonna be a long night."

After Himeko left the bar (she claimed she had a hot date with someone but….) Theresa made her way back to her flat herself.

She was frankly a bit drunk by this point, but it didn't really bother her. Otto told her a lot of things, but he never told her just how hard being a Magical Girl would be. Add this to another list of things that he didn't tell her and the stress was starting to weigh on her.

She walked up the steps to her apartment and stuck her key in the door. Admittedly, it took much, much, longer than she thought (Why did the lock on the door have to continue to move up and down so much? When did they change that!?) she eventually was able to get in.

"Oof. What a day."

Theresa's apartment wasn't much. Even for someone of her stature in Schicksal, she'd been awarded only a small stipend from which to live and work. The lights flickered a bit, and a cardboard table (filled with fan mail) covered the majority of the living room.

A small grey cat hopped up onto the couch to greet her, and Theresa bid a weary smile.

"Heya, Grace." She said cheerfully, petting the cat and plopping down on the couch next to her.

"Let me tell you something, I had one of the roughest days I've had yet. Honkai beasts, tons of them and -"

The cat was asleep. Did anyone respect what she had to say?

Theresa groaned, getting up from the couch and heading to the fridge, taking out a big gallon of ice cream and plopping herself onto the couch, picking up the remote and cutting on her television.

"The Price is High, Restless and Young, Who Wants Coins, Arahato…"

"Bleh, nothing but trash on here today…."

Soon Theresa found herself on her favorite vice - the Educational Network. She never told Otto this, but she dreamed one day of starting her own school for Valkyries. But with the small money he gave her, and the pittance she got from fighting, she wondered if she'd ever be able to fulfill it.

"Principal Theresa." She said, speaking to Grace, but really more to herself.

"Now that's a title I'd like."

After a while, Theresa had drifted off to sleep, her magical girl outfit still on, ice cream spoon in hand. A bit of pistachio ice cream trickled down her face as she drooled, snoring loudly as the tv went over lesson plans and curriculum. Her hair was matted and frazzled, her face blank.

If people could take one moment and see inside of the life of a magical girl, they'd quickly realize that it wasn't as glorious as it seemed. It felt thankless at times. This had an incredibly powerful correlation with being a Valkyrie. Were the two really different?

After a while of sleeping, Grace moved and hopped onto Theresa's face, knocking her off the couch, and the spoon into the air. It fluttered for a bit, only to plonk down on Theresa's head, causing a massive welt.

"YOWCH!" Theresa cried, being woken up without even the good decency of coffee.

Tears filled her eyes.

"Jeez! I know you didn't mean that but gosh!" She whined, putting her utensils and carton on the table and lifting her sore body up.

Her eyes glanced over at the clock.

"Ugh...what in the world….it's only 3am?"

Theresa rubbed her drowsy eyes, inadvertently getting a bit of ice cream in them, which caused her to frankly reach for a paper towel, clearing the gunk out before tossing it in the trash and sighing again.

"What am I gonna do with the rem-"

As if her mind had been read, the phone rang. People had always told her "nothing good happens after midnight" but she wasn't so sure on the origin or the context of the saying. In all her infinite wisdom, some of these more commonplace phrases were just lost on her.

"Coming, Coming!" She yelled, to no one in particular, dashing her way from across one end of the apartment to the other. (Why the heck did she put the phone so far away?)

Theresa's small hand reached across for the phone, picking it up and putting it to her ear.

"Magi- er….Theresa Apocalypse here!"

Her eyes froze. Grandpa Otto!?

"Kiana Kaslana? The Far East? Nagoroza?"

She cupped the phone muffling it. Her eyes welling with a memory. She stared at her cat, and then out the window, then back at the phone, holding it away from her face for a moment. The tiny golden crown which adorned her white locks fell to the floor.

"I'm on my way."

With that, Teri spawned the wand from her palm, the giant Super Sonata strapped to her back. Her short little legs carried her to the door, opening it up and grabbing her keys before hearing the mewling of grace.

Her eyes met with those of the cat, and she smiled faintly.

"I know you'll miss me. I'll send Himeko t-"

Another meow.

"What? You won't miss me?"

Meow.

"I've got ice cream on my face!? Is that all you have to say!"

Teri's eyes began to get angry but then they softened as Grace came over to lick the little bit of ice cream off her mistresses cheek.

Teri blushed a bit.

"Love you too, kitty. I'll be back. This mission will take all the magical power I've got~~~"

With a wink and her signature look, Teri exited the door and bounded down the steps of her apartment.

Just as she did, a pink light shone in the sky - the shadow forming a set of wings buffeted by the face of a cutesy rabbit. (Undoubtedly created by O. Apocalypse…)

The next level of Project Magical Teri Teri was just beginning.