Chapter 12 – The Beginning of Hate

There seemed to be no end in sight. They were holding their position, but Naraku wasn't giving an inch. She couldn't understand where these things were even coming from. Her shoulder was aching and sweat was pouring down her back and face. Sango maintained coverage in the sky, but she had lost track of Sesshomaru. The sun was going to set soon and nothing had changed.

"Fire!" She shouted with a hoarse voice.

Sesshomaru heard her voice and could tell her throat was getting raw. He had set out to search the perimeter and to see how far out the second wave was, but he got caught up. It would seem Naraku had sent out smaller parties to circle around and try to catch everyone off guard from behind. He had spent hours dispatching these parties. Her shouts were the only way he knew for sure she was still ok. They weren't any closer to opening up a path for her. He circled back to Sango.

"We have to make an aggressive move."

"What do you mean?" She shouted between kills.

"We need to get her to him. It won't be the final blow, but it will give us a break," he answered as he slashed another one.

"I don't understand how he is still going?!" She shouted as she sent her heel into the face of a rat demon.

"General, he won't stop until he has what he wants or he needs to tend to his own wounds."

Sango pulled Kilala back slightly and looked at him, "What is your idea?"

"Move your team in fast and hard. We can hide her in the middle of the pack. The moment we hit we spread out and move forward. I can get her to him from there."

"He will see her coming by then."

"She will be close enough to hurt him."

Sango frowned, but knew it was the only way, "Fine."

He nodded as she called her men closer to explain. He set his sights on Kagome and moved toward her. She was getting tired, but still moved with grace and precision. She had abandoned her horse hours ago. He dropped in just behind her and she snapped around in the blink of an eye.

"Where the hell have you been?" She shouted.

"We need to move you in."

She looked at him incredulous and made a sweeping motion toward the fighting, "Do you see a clear path that I don't?"

He sighed in frustration, "You need to center yourself and listen."

She frowned at him and tried to calm herself, "Go on."

"He won't stop anytime soon so we need to force him to retreat. This won't be a finishing blow, but I need to get you close enough to hurt him."

She looked confused, "You want to do all that just to get a break?"

"Yes. Many are growing tired and that means mistakes are being made. Naraku doesn't fight like the rest of us. He will go until its won, but your men need rest and food."

She was so annoyed. She swore under her breath and turned back around. She naively thought this battle would be it, but this battle was just the start. It didn't matter if she was ready or capable. It only mattered if she was willing. She turned back to Sesshomaru and stepped closer to him.

"Will you be the one to carry me in?"

"Of course."

"I just need one clean shot," she assured him.

"I trust that."

He watched her consider her options. He knew she would make the right call because it was about her people not her. He stepped closer and put a hand on her shoulder. He leaned forward and put his face closer to hers.

"I will have you," he whispered.

She looked up at him, "Your fang hasn't failed me yet."

He grinned, "Me either."

She sighed, "Ok, let's go."

She set one of their best mikos in command. She ordered her to make sure they don't let up for a second and the moment they see Sango move in to double their efforts. Then, she turned and Sesshomaru was holding a hand out to her. She looked at him and at his hand and back at him. She was learning that she was more and more willing to take his hand despite what was happening around them. She firmly grasped his hand and stepped on the cloud. He stood behind her, wrapped and arm around her tightly and held his sword at the ready.

Sango saw then approach, "Kagome, are you sure?"

Kagome gave her one firm nod.

"Alright! Let's go," she cried out.

Kagome took a deep breath as she felt her stomach plummet. She let herself fall backwards into Sesshomaru's chest. He bent at his knees and angled them downward. She almost wanted to throw up, but she looked at what they were falling toward and it hardened her. Instead she readied her bow in front of her and crouched lower to fit to Sesshomaru better. She watched as the party closed in behind her as she hid behind those in front of them. She allowed herself to enjoy the seconds of absolute security she had surrounded and hidden. She took a moment and in between breaths she found her place.

Then, the impact of them making contact with the fight shook her. The sound of it was overwhelming, but she resisted the urge to cover her ears. She looked over her shoulder and noticed more arrows starting to rain over them. Then, she looked back up and all at once they hit and spread out. Sesshomaru pushed them up and over. Kagome just barely kept track of everything that was happening. Her grip tightened on the bow as her instincts told her the moment was quickly approaching. Sesshomaru leaned into her and she felt her heart speed up.

"There he is," he whispered.

She looked forward and saw him. He seemed to be standing in a vortex of miasma. His blood red eyes found hers and she felt her skin crawl. She didn't have time to think because she could feel him reading her. All at once she poised her arrow and released, but at that exact same moment he unleashed a wave of miasma. Their eyes met for a second before both parties were hit by the others' attack. She watched her arrow strike his right shoulder just as she felt the miasma hit her directly in the chest taking her breath away.

Sesshomaru tried to flip them, but wasn't fast enough as he felt the impact of it through her body. Then, he turned them over as they were pushed through the air he looked down at her and saw she was fading. He flipped them once more before they landed and he barely caught his balance being forced to one knee. He quickly turned again to absorb the oncoming miasma. He grunted as he looked over and saw Kouga pushing his men back and shielding his face. He looked down at Kagome.

"Kagome, wake up, we need cover," he pleaded.

He saw mikos arrows pouring over them and killing off small bits of the miasma, but it was overwhelming still. He could hear people choking around them. He looked down at her and decided to do something more extreme. He raised his claw and slashed her arm. Kagome felt the burning sting and sat up screaming as she clutched her arm. She turned hot red eyes to him and growled.

"Enough. Deal with this!" He roared.

She looked over his shoulder and couldn't see anything beyond the thick black heaviness surrounding them. Then, she looked back at him and realized how much damage he was taking. She sat up and wrapped her arms around him trying to flip them around, but he held fast. She looked at him and noticed his ragged breathing, but his eyes were on those around them. Then, she turned to look and was able to make out the shapes of her men and the sound of them suffocating under the miasma. She gasped and looked back at him scared.

"Kagome, the other mikos can't do enough," he whispered roughly.

"Sesshomaru…I…" She mumbled unsure of what to say or do.

"Kagome," he pleaded.

There was something about the tone of his voice that made her feel desperate. She did the first thing she could think of. She stood up forcing his arms a part. She readied her bow and sent an arrow flying into the sky. Sesshomaru watched as her arrow purified the miasma like the other mikos, but with four times the effectiveness. He looked back at her and let himself fall backwards. She sent arrows in every direction. Then, she shot one arrow in the ground between them and waved at the other mikos. They began to send arrows into the earth and the air. He laid back and watched as the sky began to clear and smiled. He knew she could do it. He watched as she walked further into the miasma sending off more arrows clearing the field entirely.

"Oi, what the hell!?" Inuyasha yelled as he finally closed in.

"What was that?" Kouga shouted in frustration.

"We had to adjust," Sango snapped.

"By throwing Kagome at the problem?!" Inuyasha screeched.

"We weren't gaining any ground," Sesshomaru said as he finally sat up.

"The second wave hasn't even arrived yet. We could have waited for them," Kouga snapped.

"We need to rest and eat," Sango tried to reason through clenched teeth.

"That is fair," Miroku called as he leaned heavily on his staff trying to catch his breath.

"They should have been here by now," Kouga huffed.

"They were delayed. Naraku sent out extra scouting parties. I dispatched those who were attempting to get to the archers and sneak up on you. However, there were some who slipped by in the direction of the second wave," Sesshomaru explained.

"There is no telling when they will be here and Kagome is the only one who could damage him from a distance," Sango pointed out.

"Still, that was reckless," Kouga whispered as he turned to looked for Kagome.

"Where the hell did she go anyway?" Inuyasha grumbled as he looked around.

They all searched for her. Sesshomaru tried not to roll his eyes as they all looked at him first. Then, he followed them as they looked beyond. She stood where Naraku once stood and planted one arrow firmly in the ground where he once stood. Then, she slung her bow back over her shoulder. She looked down at the arrow with clenched fists as she thought about how close she had been. She could have ended everything. She hurt him, but he fled leaving behind the miasma to distract them like a coward. She noted he took his hoard with him…why? She could feel their eyes on her and sighed heavily turning toward them.

She opened her mouth, but Inuyasha beat her to it, "What they hell happened to her arm!?"

Sesshomaru closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

Kagome sighed, "Perhaps now is the time to set up camp and rest. Once we have some food in us we can discuss what happens now."

Every nodded as their orders were given. She watched them pick up the wounded and drag themselves to the tree line. She looked back at where her arrow was planted and sighed on last time. Then, she turned and walked back to Sesshomaru who was still sitting on the ground. She stopped right next to him and put her hand on his shoulder.

"Will this be one of those sleeps that happens sitting up?" She asked with humor.

He looked up at her and grinned, "I don't think I'll have any control of that."

"Come, let's rest," she called softly to him.

He reached up and lightly put his hand on hers, "I will follow."

Kagome looked down at him and could see how weary he was. She never thought she would see him this way. She bent beside him and grabbed his face forcing him to look at her. When she looked at his face she gasped. His eyes were tinting red, but there was also black bleeding in. He was sweating and could barely keep his eyes open.

"I apologize for your arm," he whispered brokenly.

She looked at it and shrugged, "I can heal that…are you ok?"

He lazily lifted his eyes up to her, "You are…so beautiful," he whispered.

"Sesshomaru…what's wrong with you?" She asked nervously.

He opened his mouth to respond, but instead fell forward. She cried out as he fell into her arms. His head fell into her chest and she was just barely able to catch herself with one arm as she wrapped her other arm around his shoulders.

"Inuyasha!" She screamed.

He ran toward her scream and was only slightly disappointed when he saw her clutching his brother's body. He moved in and grabbed his brother's face and dropped it just as fast.

"Shit. Miasma positioning. You two were the first to get hit when it was first released weren't you."

"Yes, but I'm fine," she argued desperately.

"It's different. Your body purifies it, but the rest of us can't fight it. He took a lot."

"What do we do!?"

"Damnit," he huffed.

Then, he snatched Sesshomaru's body off the ground and threw it over his shoulder. Kagome jumped to her feet.

"Be careful!" She screamed as she followed him.

They quickly found a med tent that had been set up for the injured. Sango was there along with one of their best healers, Yuki. Yuki's eyes turned to Inuyasha the second he entered the tent and found Sesshomaru. Everyone followed and silence fell over them. The Great Lord Sesshomaru was being carried into a med-tent.

"Put him here," Yuki ordered.

Inuyasha dropped his body, "Miasma poisoning."

"Stop throwing him like that," Kagome snapped.

She looked at his eyes, "It's in his blood. We will have to bleed some of this out."

She pushed Inuyasha back and moved toward Kagome. They locked eyes and Kagome stood impossibly straight. Yuki bowed her head and carefully walked around her. Kagome stood near his head and clasped her hands in front of her until her knuckles turned white. She watched as Yuki and her assistant removed his top and tore his pants roughly at mid-thigh to remove his pant legs. Then, she stopped herself from gasping as she cut his thighs, wrists, upper arms and calves. She turned her eyes to Yuki demanding an explanation.

"We have to get enough of the poisoned blood out to allow new blood to generate and overpower the rest. Once these begin to heal we will know he is getting better," Yuki carefully explained.

"I understand," Kagome nodded once.

Yuki bowed her head respectfully and stepped away. Inuyasha stood at Sesshomaru's feet and watched the way Kagome was watching him. He wondered if he were laying there would she still have that look on her face.

"He is a tough bastard. He'll be fine."

She looked up at him and gave him a weak smile, "Thank you, Yasha."

He nodded and walked away promising to get things in order. She stood there watching him bleed out trying to will his wounds to close with her mind. She found a stool and sat beside him. As she sat there the day began to wear on her and before she realized it her head was falling. She fell asleep with her head next to his dreaming of a temple, cherry blossoms and the smell of the coconuts.

….

He felt himself wake up before his eyes actually opened. He laid there for a moment just taking inventory of his body. He felt heavy and he could tell he had been cut. He remembered the attack, the miasma and her face. Slowly he opened his eyes to see a tent above him. He felt the heat coming off her body as he turned his head to see her slumped over beside him. He let his head fall all the way to the side until he could feel her silky hair on his face. He took a deep breath and let her scent wash over him. He enjoyed waking this way even if he felt a bit like death.

"You are picking up my sleeping habits," he whispered.

She jerked awake just barely missing his nose with the top of her head. She blinked the sleep out of her eyes as her mind raced to figure out what she just heard. She reached out and clumsily grabbed his face as her vision cleared. Then, she was clearly seeing Sesshomaru.

"Oh, thank goodness," she sighed with tears in her eyes.

"Honestly, it was just miasma," he sounded bored.

She scoffed, "Sesshomaru, you couldn't even walk off the field!"

"Nonsense," he grunted.

He grunted again as he sat up. She quickly wrapped an arm around him to assist. She still couldn't wrap her head around him being so…low. Then, she realized she was touching his bare skin which was like marble. She snatched her hands back and sat down in her stool with a thud. Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow at her, but ignored it.

"Have there been any signs of him yet?" He asked.

She sighed, "Not yet, but everyone is staying on high alert. We got word from Ken. They should be here by mid-day. There have been some casualties for them."

He nodded, "As was expected."

She looked at her hands, "I could have killed him."

He looked at her, "There is no use going down that path of regret."

She shook her head, "I know."

"Kagome."

"Yes."

"Why aren't you looking at me?"

She blushed and realized she was looking everywhere, but at him and his body.

He grinned, "Kagome, look at me."

She furrowed her brow and looked up like a petulant child, "What?"

He could see how flustered she was and could tell why, "Are you uneasy with my body?"

"Sesshomaru!" She gasped.

He smiled, "Strange that just a layer of cloth dramatically changes your confidence with me."

She frowned, "Don't be inappropriate."

He laughed softly and her heart beat a little faster. She loved that sound. Then, she froze as he started to move. He moved up and swung his legs over the side of the table just beside her. He looked down at her with a look she hadn't really seen before and couldn't name. She held her breath as he moved toward her and touched her face.

"Come and say hello," he whispered.

She wasn't sure why, but she stood up and stepped toward him. He reached forward and grabbed her waist pulling her closer. She stepped between his legs until she felt the table against her hips. Her breath was shaky at this point and her eyes wide. The man was practically only wearing underwear. She held her hands in front of her chest.

"Hello, Kagome."

"Hello, Sesshomaru," she whispered shyly.

"Thank you."

She cocked her head to the side, "For what?"

"Saving me," his face was serious.

She looked at him searching for sincerity and found it. For some reason she was suddenly overwhelmed with him being awake and okay. She threw her arms around his neck and pulled him close. She buried her face in his neck and he felt her sigh heavily.

"I'm so glad you're ok," she whispered.

He put his arms around her and closed his eyes. It was an odd thing to feel someone's concern for his well being, but he liked it. He remembered the way he felt as that miasma was released and his heart dropped because he thought he might lose her. He wondered if that was how she felt. He ran his hands up her back and tangled one claw in her hair. He liked her this close.

She felt the hug changing and pulled back slightly to look at him. She could feel his cool smooth skin under her hands and his solid muscle under that. She could feel his chest against hers and his hand pressing into her. She felt something switch in her as her hands fell over his shoulders and onto his chest. He felt her touch change and saw her eyes tint slightly. Suddenly, his body wasn't heavy or tired, but very awake. He pulled her hair softly to get her chin to tilt up and he leaned in.

"Oi! Are you two kidding me?!" Inuyasha screamed.

Sesshomaru growled, "Damn him."

Kagome sighed and stepped away from him reluctantly, "What do you want?"

"Are you even embarrassed?!" He was shocked.

She turned with red eyes, "Not nearly as much as you."

He noted her sharp tone and red eyes, "Great, it's YOU."

She rolled her eyes and put her hands on her hips, "What do you need?"

He scrunched his nose at her, but went on, "We need to send a scouting party out to see if Naraku is moving at all."

Her eyes cleared somewhat, "Of course."

Just like that they were back in war. She looked at Sesshomaru longingly, but shook her head and walked toward Inuyasha. Sesshomaru watched her walk away and really wanted to snatch her back, but he realized they needed to get things done. He stood up and walked toward them.

"I will lead the party. I've already seen the trails his other parties used," he said.

Kagome turned and opened her mouth to say something, but stopped at the sight of his large almost naked frame. She looked him over and noticed how long and lean his legs were. She looked at his feet and noticed his toes turned slightly inward. She smiled at his feet. Everything about him was perfect, straight, solid and pristine. Then, there was this reminder that he was a child once. It was her favorite part of him.

"Oi! My God, can you focus," Inuyasha sounded disgusted.

She blushed as she snapped back to reality, "Sorry!"

Sesshomaru smirked, "Kagome will go with me. I will also take Ken and two other soldiers."

Inuyasha glared at him, "Is it really smart for her to leave?"

"Ask her."

Kagome was caught off guard and hesitated, "I…I'll go with him."

"Then, Ken will stay here. I'm going as well," Inuyasha said his piece and left abruptly.

Kagome watched him go, "He will never be ok with this."

Sesshomaru walked up behind her and leaned down to her ear, "He will adjust."

She didn't turn around, but leaned into him, "Please, put clothes on."

He laughed, "Would you assist?"

She turned just enough to cut her eyes at him, "Lord Sesshomaru, find some pants."

He grinned as she squared her shoulders and walked toward the door. He put his hands loosely on his hips as he watched her walk away. He really was looking forward to the end of this war. He sighed and found the additional clothing Ken and brought for him. He got himself dressed and walked back into Inuyasha and Kagome fighting.

"We don't need that many," Kagome shouted.

"What if we get caught off guard? You'll regret only bringing two additional soldiers," he barked back.

She screamed in frustration.

"Inuyasha, we need to travel with few for speed," Sesshomaru cut in.

Inuyasha glared, "Then, why not go on your own?"

"I don't want to," he said simply.

Inuyasha glared at his brother.

Now, it was Kagome who cut in as she said, "Maybe he has a point."

Sesshomaru looked at her sharply, "Excuse me?"

"He might be on my last nerve, but this does require stealth. You could go on your own and be must faster," she sounded resigned.

His eyebrow twitched knowing they were right, but he didn't want to let Inuyasha win. This needed to be done quickly and with speed, but he refused to separate from her. He smirked at Inuyasha when he realized who the fastest among them was.

"I will send Ken alone. He is after all the quickest."

Inuasyah opened his mouth to argue, but snapped it back shut.

"That's perfect," Kagome chimed.

"Keh, fine with me," Inuyasha grumbled.

Ken departed moments later. Inuyasha launched into a tree somewhere to pout. Kagome decided it was time to visit the bodies of the people they lost. Their bodies were wrapped and stored in a tent until they could be brought back to their loved ones. She walked to the tent and steadied herself. She closed her eyes and stepped in and when she opened her eyes her heart dropped. There were at least fifty bodies laid out before her. Most were wrapped in red showing they were from the east. There were a few bodies wrapped in brown for the south and one navy from the west. She couldn't believe it. Tears gathered in her eyes and fell over her lashes. She heard someone walk in behind her, but couldn't look away.

"The price of war," Sesshomaru spoke softly beside her.

"Is it worth it? They have left holes in so many lives," she wept.

"Kagome, they have done their duty. They believed in what we are doing."

"And what is that even?" She asked harshly.

"Peace. This if for peace and this world is one of balance so chaos must exist before peace."

She cried softly, "Sesshomaru."

He looked down at her and it tugged at his heart. She might have had violence within her, but she was love more than anything. He could remember the day he found Rin. Her little face was tough and mute, but the tears in her eyes were proof that love still existed within her. He stepped closer to her and grabbed her hand. He closed his fingers around her small hand and she closed her fingers around his like a vice. She closed her eyes, bowed her head and prayed.

Ken made it back in record time with nothing to report. They went the rest of the day trying to rest, but also on high alert. Kagome tended to the wounded spreading her healing power all over. Sesshomaru warned her against such a use of power, but she waved him off. She argued it would be better that her army be at a 100% rather than just her. Now, he waited in her tent to make sure she found her bed.

Kagome felt like every step would be her last. She couldn't believe she was still going with as tired as she was, but it was as if her body was moving on its own. The sky was growing dark and Inuyasha took Ken to keep watch. She yawned as she finally pulled her tent open and wasn't even shocked to see Sesshomaru.

"Is there where you've been hiding?"

"You look half dead," he said dryly.

She shrugged as she yawned again. She moved forward as she tried to remove her robe, but her fingers were tripping over the ties. He sighed and stood up. He walked up to her and smacked her hands away. She was too tired to fight. Instead she stood perfectly still as he carefully untied her robe and gently pushed it back. Then, he bent before her and unlaced her shoes tapping each foot as a signal for her to lift which she did. He stood back up and looked at her ignoring the tears in her eyes.

"Are you wearing something under this?"

She nodded slowly.

"May I?"

She nodded as a tear fell.

He couldn't ignore it, "Why are you crying?"

"I…I don't know," she said softly.

He sighed and unbuttoned her suit. He understood her tears because he too was feeling a strange sort of way about his own behavior. He didn't understand the need to care for her nor the peace that came from doing it. He didn't think about the fact that he was undressing her, but rather the fact that she needed to be comfortable in order to rest. He tugged the suit down and revealed a very thin and short white kimono and shorts underneath. She seemed too small as she stepped out of it.

"Sesshomaru?" She whispered.

He stopped and looked at her, "Yes."

"No amount of love can stop this."

He thought for a moment before saying, "The point is not to stop it."

She began crying mostly from exhaustion, but it felt overwhelming as she cried, "What is the point then!?"

He gently cupped her face, "I cannot say for certain, but the answer will never be the impossible. We have to search for what is possible…that's all."

She fell into him as she cried. All she could see was the battlefield and the fighting. She could see the wrapped bodies of the dead and the bandaged bodies of the broken. She could see the hate in Naraku's red eyes and she could feel how much she hated him. Sesshomaru swept her legs from under her and quickly walked over to her mat. He laid her down and moved to cover her, but she latched on.

"Please, don't leave," she begged.

His heart hurt feeling her pain and desperation. Her scent took on an edge he had not noticed before this moment and he didn't like smelling it on her. He slowly laid next to her on his side putting his arm out for her to lay her head on. She moved into him like he was a lone fire in an icy field. She clutched his shirt and pulled herself closer as her head moved up his arm. He rested his hand on her waist as they looked at each other.

They understood each other. He understood why she was crying and she understood why he was not. What was new to her was routine for him and that made her even sadder. He was capable of such depth, but he was hard and stoic because of this world. She found herself growing angry and he could feel that. Those capable of such love were just as capable of anger and that anger would grow to hatred. He moved his hand up and cupped her head as he pulled her closer. He heard her crying softly, but her breath evened out and exhaustion won out.

As he laid there holding her he wondered to himself…would Kagome have love left after this?

Author's Note:

Hope you guys enjoyed this one!