CHAPTER ONE

What's up, my faithful readers? Just another story based off an already original one. I'm just doing this to get it off my mind so I can get back to working on my other stories.

I am basing it on Mumei Mu's story What a Dramatic Life. But I decided to make some key differences, some of which I'll go ahead and tell you since it doesn't affect the plot whatsoever.

- Naruto is not the son of Chris. Chris just knows the family and asked if he would be interested in coming onto the show.

- Naruto's hair is not red. It's his canon hair color with a few alterations.

- The pairings may be adjusted and are not definite. Scratch that. They will be changed.

- Naruto's family is not dead and will make appearances now and again.

I will get around to answering your questions in future chapters.

I also want to extend my gratitude towards Jonathan Matute for assisting me by giving me ideas for this story. If you would like to help me, please message me, and I'll be happy to talk with you, provided you are as respectful. I could point out one guy whom I have blocked because he does nothing but goes onto other people's accounts and talk crap about them.

As you can see, I'm a bit bitter towards people that don't show others respect.

CHAPTER START

Tears streamed down the whisker-marked cheeks of a four-year-old as his parents (a blonde man and a redhaired woman) loaded up the car.

"I don't wanna leave (blank)-chan, tebayo. Why can't we stay here?" He held the hand of a young girl in a white sundress with a yellow straw hat that covered her features.

His father walked over to the two and smiled. "Your grandma is sick, Naruto, so we have to leave for Japan as soon as possible. We'll be back as soon as we can."

"B-but what if (blank)-chan moves too?"

Minato's eyes softened as did his smile. "Then we'll look for her. All three of us."

Naruto turned his eyes downward and nodded his head.

Cerulean eyes belonging to a now much older Naruto opened up, taking in the natural calmness of the lake. He lazily scratched his head before yawning. "It's been years since I last thought about her." A devilish smile stretched upon his whiskered cheeks. "I wonder if she grew up into someone cute."

'Why can't I remember her name? It just comes up as a blank. Hell, I can barely remember what she was wearing the last time I saw her.'

"Yo! We're coming at you live from Camp Wawanakwa, somewhere near Muskoka, Ontario! I'm your host Chris McLean dropping you to the hottest new reality show Total Drama Island!" He was a short black-haired man wearing a white longsleeved shirt underneath a blue short-sleeved button-up shirt and a green pair of slacks with sneakers. "Here's the deal: 23 campers have signed up to spend eight weeks right here at this crummy old summer camp. They'll compete in challenges against each other, then have to face the judgment of their fellow campers. Every three days, one team will either win a reward or watch one teammate walk down the Dock of Shame and leave on the Loser Boat, leaving the island for good."

Chris directed the camera to a clearing near the docks where twelve tree stumps that were facing a fire pit. "Their fate will be decided here, at the dreaded Campfire Ceremony, where one week all but one character will receive a marshmallow." He proceeded to grab an already made marshmallow-on-a-stick and ate it. "In the end, only one camper will be rewarded with cheesy tabloid fame and a small fortune. But let's face it; they'll probably blow it all in a week.

"To survive, they'll have to battle black flies, grizzly bears, disgusting camp food, and each other. We'll catch every moment on the hundreds of cameras situated around the camp. Who will crumble under pressure? Find out right now on Total.

"Drama!

"ISLAND!"

Theme plays

(Beth)

"And we're back!"

Chris took the cue to bring up one of the contestants.

"Beth," Chris said with a smile, "what's up?" As soon as the boat pulled away, a stout teenaged girl wearing pink leggings and a green shirt with a beige vest could be seen. She also wore a pair of thick glasses and smiled a lot, revealing that she had braces.

The girl squealed before hugging the host. "Hi, Chris! It's so incredulous to meet you finally." Her smile dropped as a slight hint of disappointment marred her face. "You're much shorter in real life."

"Oooookay."

(DJ)

The next to arrive was a muscular-built teenaged male with dark skin that wore a green shirt with the letter "D" and a pair of shorts with flip-flops. "DJ."

"Yo, Chris," the Jamaican giant said as he looked around. "Are you sure this is the right place? Where's the hot tub at?"

"Yeah, this is the right place. Welcome to Camp Wawanakwa."

DJ grabbed his bags while mumbling something about how everything looked different on the brochure.

(Gwen)

"You can't be serious," the new girl grumbled as she carried her bags off the boat. "Is this really where we're staying?" She wore a black low-cut corset over a blue shirt, displaying her cleavage and a bit of midriff. Her hair was dyed black with teal streaks that brought the gothic look altogether.

"This is where you're staying. My place has AC."

"Well, I'm not staying." Gwen crossed her arms with a scowl, only to have a contract shoved into her face.

"Yeah, you are. It's in your contract."

She yanked the contract out of his hands before ripping it with a smirk. However, her momentary joy was short-lived when Chris reminded her that his lawyers kept copies. "And if you want to leave, you'd better start swimming. Your boat's already left."

"Jerk."

(Geoff)

Party music echoed across the lake as a young teen with chin-length blond hair under a ten-gallon hat pumped his fists in the air. He wore an open pink button-up shirt, showing a well-defined body underneath and a gold chain around his neck, and blue cargo shorts. "Chris McLean, WOO!" He landed on the dock in front of the host with a couple of flips.

"Geoff, what's up, man?"

"Nothing much, man. What about you?"

"I'm great, man."

"If they say 'man' one more time, I'm gonna barf," Gwen said aloud. Geoff stood by the campers as the next one pulled up.

(Lindsay)

"Not too shabby, huh?" Chris asked as the camera panned up from the girl's cowboy boots to her blue bandana covering her blonde hair. She wore an orange skirt and deep cut brown top over an equally-low cut red sleeveless shirt that showed an ample amount of cleavage. Both shirts bore a tiny bit of her midriff, although the undershirt was a bit longer.

"Hi, um..." She paused for a bit, trying to remember where she saw the guy.

"It's Chris McLean..." He got an empty stare in response. "...The host of this show?"

"Oh. That's where I know you from." She moved to stand by the others as Chris rubbed his temples.

"Sheesh. Not too bright, that one."

(Heather)

The faces of the campers reflected off the new girl's sunglasses as she sized up the competition before eventually lowering them. She was a young woman of Asian descent who wore a crimson bikini top held up by a ring with straps around her neck, a beige pair of shorts with a black belt, and high-heeled sandals.

"Heather..." Chris dragged the last syllable of her name. She chose to stay quiet and walked towards the rest of the contestants.

"Hi! My name is Beth!" Heather visibly winced as she felt the saliva from the girl's mouth hit her skin.

(Duncan)

The sounds of rock music filled the air, much like the club music from earlier as the next boat pulled up. Standing on the speaker was a teen with a green mohawk, soul patch, and multiple piercings on his face. He wore a black short-sleeved shirt over a white long-sleeved shirt and a pair of red All-Stars. A black spiky choker sat upon his neck, pulling the punk vibes together.

The teen jumped from the boat deck and landed in front of the host.

"I don't like... surprises." He emphasized this by punching his palm, which failed to intimidate Chris.

"Yeah, your parole officer told me that. He also said to give him a holler, and you go straight back to juvie."

Duncan rolled his eyes with a "Whatever." He smiled at Heather as he walked towards the rest of the group, causing the girl to scoff.

"See you around, gorgeous."

"Yeah, right. Chris, I'm calling my parents." Heather began walking back towards the other end of the dock.

(Tyler)

"Ladies and gentlemen, Tyler!"

The said athlete was being pulled by the boat on a pair of water skis wearing a red tracksuit and headband.

Unfortunately, he was propelled forward into the luggage once the boat stopped, causing one of the bags to fly in the air before falling into the water. The group watched as it fell into the water with a splash, soaking Heather.

The snobbish girl growled as she started to squeeze her hair dry. "My shoes!"

(Naruto)

"Man, that was a wicked wipeout." Chris laughed as the next guest arrived.

An orange beanie cap covered his spiky blonde hair. His eyes were covered by green goggles that he lifted to rest on his forehead as a smile crept across his whiskered face.

He wore an orange windbreaker jacket over a black T-shirt with a picture of an orange and red fox in a tribal pattern.

"OOOOIIII! CHRIS-OJII-SAN!" Naruto cupped his mouth with a grin and yelled, startling said host as he was standing right next to him.

"Naruto! What did I tell you about sneaking up behind me like that?!"

Naruto shrugged as a grin spread across his whiskered cheeks. "It's fun to make you scream."

Chris rubbed his temples, feeling a stress migraine start to form. 'Like mother like son. I was hoping you took more after your father.'

Naruto bumped fists with Duncan with a smirk. The punk smirked back with a chuckle. "So, I guess I'm up for that hundred grand against you, huh, Blondie?"

"You can say that again. I'm in this to win it."

"You two know each other?" Geoff asked, getting a nod in reply from both of them.

"We were in juvie together for a while. Naruto was the top dog there, and I was his second in command."

It was for a month, but Naruto had shown that he was not one to be trifled with. Especially that other kid.

(Harold)

Chris snickered as Heather then walked back to the group, still soaked to the bone.

The sounds of heavy breathing could be heard behind the host, causing him to turn towards the source to see a brown-haired teen with long hair in glasses almost as thick as Beth's. He wore a pink long-sleeved shirt under a blue one with green trim and a cheeseburger printed on the front.

"Welcome to Camp, Harold." There was a pregnant pause as Harold studied his surroundings.

Beth soon broke the silence by asking, "What's he looking at?" Naruto gave her a shrug.

"So, you mean to tell me that this show takes place in this crappy summer camp instead of a stage?" Harold asked.

"Yes."

"That's so great for my skills."

Naruto's eyes clenched as his face turned into one of confusion. "I don't know what his skills are? Are they going to be useful-tebayo?"

"Wanna make a wager?" Naruto turned towards Geoff, who missed a look from Duncan. "I bet he is the first person to get voted off."

Duncan sighed as he already knew how it was going to go.

"Okay. I bet that Harold will make it to the top 15."

(Trent)

"Contestant number 10 is Trent."

Chris introduced a young man holding a guitar case and backpack. The teen had a solid green tee with a handprint over a long-sleeved camo shirt.

"Nice meeting you, man. I saw you on that figure skating show. Nice work." Trent bumped fists with the host.

"Thanks. I knew I rocked that show."

"I saw that too," Beth chimed in. "One of the contestants dropped his partner on her head. They got immunity that week."

"Lucky," Harold groaned. "I wish I got dropped on my head."

"Me too," Lindsay agreed.

"Why would you want to get dropped on your head?" Gwen asked. "You'd kill what brain cells you guys had left."

"So this is it?" Trent looked over the group as Harold stuck his hand up to his nose, much to the people surrounding's disgust. "Alrighty then."

He threw a quick grin Gwen's way only to for the girl to cross her arms and look away in a huff. However, once he looked away to give Naruto a fist bump, he didn't notice the smile on her face.

(Bridgette)

Next up was a blond surfer girl with a blue hoodie that (much like most of the other girls) showed a bit of her midriff. In her hands was a red and orange surfboard with a wave design. A pair of jean capris and flip-flops pulled the ensemble together.

"Hey, what's up?"

"Our surfer chick, Bridgette, is here."

Duncan scoffed at the girl's board. "This ain't Malibu, honey."

"Sorry," Bridgette responded. "I thought there was going to be a beach."

"We are," Chris said as the camera focused on a seagull with its head caught in a polymer chain. It seemed to be lifeless, the chain wrapped around its neck as the tide pulled it into the water. Bridgette sighed as she picked her bags up with a "Great." Her board hit Chris in the head as she did.

"Ow! That hurt!"

"The name's Naruto," the orange-loving blonde introduced himself along with Geoff. The girl turned to face them, almost hitting Trent, Harold, and Duncan in the head. The former leaned back while the latter two ducked. "Dang!" Harold mumbled. "Watch the board, man!" Beth introduced herself as well, causing the board to get swung around once more.

"Okay, we met surfer girl," Heather said as she squeezed the last few drops of water out of her hair. "Can we get back to the show, please?"

"Someone forgot her double cappuccino macchiato this morning." Duncan smiled at his little comment before getting a smack upside the head by Naruto.

(Noah)

A scrawny looking teen with dark tan skin arrived next. He had chin-length brown hair and wore a red vest over a short-sleeved collared shirt with a long-sleeved white t-shirt underneath. A pair of green sandals matched his green shorts.

"Did you get the memo about my life-threatening allergies?" he asked Chris.

"I'm sure someone did." Chris chuckled as the boy strolled past him.

"Good. Is this where we're staying?"

"No. It's your mother's house, and we're throwing a party," Duncan told him as he cracked his knuckles.

"Cute," Noah said with a stony face. "Nice piercings. Original. Did you do them yourself?"

"Yeah, you want one?" The punk grabbed the boy's bottom lip and pulled them towards him, a needle in his unoccupied hand.

"No, thanks. Can I have my lip back?" Duncan released the tan-skinned bookworm's lips.

(Leshawna)

"What's up, y'all? Leshawna's in the house." A curvy African Canadian woman waved from the boat as it pulled up. "Save yourselves the trouble and quit right now because I came to win." She walked right up to D.J. and gave him a high-five. "What's up, brother? Give me some skin."

Harold chose that time (as well as any other) to be a bit blunt. "Wow. I've never seen a girl like you in real life."

"A girl like me?" Leshawna's eyebrow rose as she smiled at the boy. It was gone as soon as it appeared on her face, however.

"You're big... and loud." The air grew thick as Naruto rubbed the bridge of his nose. Trent and Gwen visibly cringed.

"Oh, dear Kami. Forget worrying about him getting voted off. I have to worry about him getting killed-dattebayo."

Leshawna lunged at the boy who pulled himself into a karate stance only to be stopped by D.J. and Bridgette. Naruto stepped in between the two, keeping one hand on Harold's chest as he chopped the air in front with his hand. The former raised an eyebrow at the eccentric stance as the latter took on something resembling the Monkey style. 'He thinks that just because he watched a few kung-fu movies, he knows how to do kung-fu. What a dumbass.'

Chris then jumped in to separate the two, and as Leshawna straightened herself out, her eyes met the ones of the nerd. Harold smiled sheepishly.

(Katie and Sadie)

At the end of the pier stood two identically dressed teenage girls. Although one was dark-skinned and thin, the other was heavyset and pale. They had matching midriff-bearing black-with-white-striped shirts that revealed their shoulders and pink shorts.

"Ladies! Sadie! Katie! Welcome to Camp Wawanakwa!"

The camera focused on said camp before focusing back on the girls.

Katie, the dark-skinned girl, then turned to her friend. "Oh my god, Sadie, look! A summer camp!"

"I know! I always wanted to go to a summer camp! EEEEE!" The two moved over to the rest of the group, causing Chris to scratch his head in confusion as the next boat pulled up.

(Ezekiel)

It dropped off a strange-looking teen dressed in a hoodie, jeans, and a beanie cap.

"Ezekiel, what's up?" the host greeted only for the guy to look up.

"I think that's a bird, eh."

Trent snickered at the conversation unfolding in front of him. Gwen looked confused, and Naruto was just trying to figure out why each new contestant was getting weirder and weirder.

"Okay, look, dude. I know you don't get out much. Been homeschooled your whole life, raised by freaky prairie people. Just be sure to watch what you say and not get kicked off too fast, okay?" Chris got an affirmative answer out of him.

"Okay, that's just... Wow."

Naruto couldn't have said it better himself.

(Cody)

"Cody. The Codester. The Code-meister." Chris shot the double finger-gun salute at Cody, who shot it right back. Said teen wore a gray button-up sweater with the sleeves halfway rolled up to his forearm under a polo shirt with two red stripes.

"I see the ladies have already arrived," Cody said with a smile as he walked past Leshawna, Bridgette and Lindsay. He turned around to talk to the former but was stopped by a finger to the mouth.

(Eva)

A sneakered foot stomped onto the pier, followed by the rest of the bodybuilder as she stepped off the boat. The owner was a muscular young woman with a unibrow and a mole on her left wearing a blue exercise suit.

"Eva. Nice. Glad you could make it." She strolled past Chris up to Cody, who was poised to give her a high-five. Unfortunately, all he got was her bag that dropped on his foot with a metal clang. He yelped before pulling it out from under the carrier bag.

"What do you have in there, dumbbells?"

"Yes."

"She's all yours," Duncan said to Naruto.

"Nah. I'd feel better knowing that she was with you-dattebayo."

(Owen)

"WOOHOO!" Chris had to make sure that his eardrum hadn't burst with the next contestant, an overweight teen with blonde hair wearing a t-shirt with a blue maple leaf and shorts. "Chris! What's happening!?" He gripped his head with a laugh before pumping his fist in the air. "This is awesome! WOOHOO!"

Chris was pulled into a hug as he introduced the new guy as Owen. The big lug pulled the host in for a hug, giving an audible crack.

"It's awesome to be here, man. Being here is just so..." Owen took a minute to think, but Gwen had beaten him to it.

"Awesome?"

"Yeah. Are you on my team?"

"Gee. I sure hope so." The sarcasm drifted off the girl's voice.

"I like this dude," Naruto said with a massive grin.

"Of course you would. You two seem to share the same brain."

(Courtney)

"And here comes Courtney." Another tan-skinned girl arrived on the boat. She waved towards the group before stepping off. "Hi. You must be the other contestants. It's very nice to meet you."

Owen, who had not even made it stand with the others, immediately grabbed her hand to shake it.

"How's it goin'? I'm Owen."

"Nice to meet you, O - Oh, wow."

(Justin)

An attractive teen pulled up to the docks, getting almost everyone's attention on him.

As he smiled, Sadie fainted to the floor as Katie bit her lips, and Eva swooned over him.

"This is Justin. Welcome to Total Drama Island. You know we only brought you on for your looks, right?" Chris asked, only to get a shrug from Justin.

"I can live with that."

Naruto had turned his back to the group, mouthing that last sentence. He dropped his head with a sigh. 'Maybe I can strive to win that money. Eh, I don't need it anyway.'

"I like your pants," Owen said as he ran towards the new addition. "They look they're all worn out. Did you buy them like that?"

"No. Just had them for a while."

"Oh... Cool." Owen slapped himself upside the head for the dumb remark. Some of the campers idly wondered if he played for the other team.

(Izzy)

"Hey, everyone. Izzy." Said redhead waved towards the bunch while greeting them before she tripped off the starboard bow, tumbling off and smacking her chin against the end of the pier.

"Ooooh, that was bad," Tyler said with a small laugh. Courtney and Naruto pulled her out of the water, the latter a bit concerned about her. Once out of the water, Izzy shook herself off, splashing the two.

"That felt... so... GOOD. Except for hitting my chin. Is this a summer camp? Do you have papier-mache here? Are we serving lunch soon?" Naruto wondered if she needed time to breathe with all the rapid-fire questions coming out of her mouth.

"THAT... is a good call!" Owen yelled.

"First things first, we need to take a group photo for the promos. Everyone move to the end of the pier."

The contestants all did as Chris said and posed for the picture, though Naruto could hear the sound of the pier creaking.

"Does anyone else hear that-tebayo?" he asked.

"Okay, what does "dattebayo" mean exactly?" Lindsay chose to ask.

"It's a verbal tic, much like my mom's. I've had it ever since I was a kid." Naruto sheepishly grinned, missing the slight frown on one of the girls' faces.

Chris jumped up on the boat to take the picture while the teens posed. Though for a few minutes, he struggled with the camera until Naruto, who was giving a double peace sign down in front of his knees behind Sadie and Katie, spoke up. "Oi! What the hell is taking so long-dattebayo!?"

"Give me a moment. I forgot about the lens cap." Chris chuckled as he pressed a button revealing the lens. A few minutes later had him adjusting the full memory card.

"Any time now," Leshawna told him. "My face is cramping up."

"Okay... On three say 'Wawanakwa.'"

"WAWANAKW-AAAAAH!" The dock had fallen just as Naruto had said it would earlier, taking the contestants into the water. With a flash, Chris took the picture showing a bunch of them floating in the lake. "After you guys dry off, meet me by the campfire pit in ten."

With everyone crowded around the campfire facing Chris, the host then took that time to introduce them to the workings of the camp.

"This is Camp Wawanakwa, your home for the next eight weeks," he said, going over what he had told the audience not too long ago. "The campers sitting around you will be your cabinmates, your competition, and maybe even your friends, ya dig?" The camera paused on several people and eventually stopped on Harold and Duncan, the latter balling his fist when Chris mentioned friends. "The camper that stays on the longest without getting voted off will win 100,000 dollars."

"Excuse me," Duncan cut in. "What are your sleeping arrangements? Because I want to bunk with her." He pointed towards Heather.

"They aren't coed, are they?" she asked in disgust.

"No. Girls get one side of each cabin, and boys will get the other."

"Excuse me, Kyle. Can I get a cabin with the lakeside view since I'm the prettiest?"

Chris gave Lindsay a negative while correcting her about his name.

"I have to live with Sadie, or I'll die."

"And I'll break out in hives. It's true." Katie nodded at her best friend's words.

"This... can not be happening," Gwen said as she held her head in her hand. She was then pulled into a hug with Tyler by Owen. "Come on," the big guy reassured her. "Think of it as a sleepover."

"At least you don't have to bunk next to him." After getting the goth girl's attention, Tyler nodded his chin towards Duncan. Said delinquent had a deer in a quarter nelson while using his free hand to give it a noogie.

"Here's the deal: we're going to split you into two teams. If I call your name out, stand over there. Gwen, Trent, Heather, Cody, Lindsay, Beth, Katie, Owen, Leshawna, Justin, and Noah. You will be known as the Screaming Gophers." He tossed a green banner towards the group that Owen unfurled to reveal the silhouette of a gopher with its mouth open and its fists balled up.

"I'm a Gopher!"

"Wait... What about Sadie?"

"The rest of you, over here. Geoff, Bridgette, D.J., Tyler, Sadie, Izzy, Courtney, Ezekiel, Duncan, Eva, and Harold. You guys will be officially known as the Killer Bass."

"But Katie is a Gopher. I have to be a Gopher!" Sadie felt a hand on her shoulder and looked over to see Courtney trying to give her condolences. "It'll be okay. Come on."

"But this is so unfair! I'll miss you, Katie!"

"And I'll miss you, Sadie!"

Naruto blinked as he watched the two teams. "Um... What about me?" he asked Chris with a puzzled expression on his face.

"Oh... Right. Naruto, for right now until one of the two teams loses a member, you're an independent. Even if you win some of the challenges, you still have to go to the Campfire Ceremony. But that means that even if you lose you also get the reward-"

"Don't want it."

"... Are you sure?"

"Piggybacking off someone else's success leaves a bad taste in my mouth. My old man taught me that."

Chris raised an eyebrow at that before shrugging his shoulders. 'Guess Minato did rub off on him a little bit. His old man did always have a bit of a bleeding heart.' "All right, campers. You and your teammates - and Naruto - will be on camera at all public areas during this competition."

(Confessional - Chris)

"You will also be able to share your innermost thoughts on tape with video diaries any time you want. Let the audience at home know what you're thinking. Or just get something off your chest."

(Tape Break - Gwen)

"Um... Okay. First off, this sucks."

(Tape Break - Lindsay)

"I don't get it." Lindsay was not facing the cameras, giving a view of her lower back. "Where's the camera?"

(Tape Break)

A duck applied lipstick to its beak before it realized that the camera was on.

(Tape Break - Owen)

"Okay... Listen, everyone. I have something important to tell you." Owen's face was one of seriousness before he farted and chuckled.

(Tape Break - Naruto)

"Ugh. Why did Owen have to fart in here?" Naruto asked as he held his nose and fanned the air around him. "Now... I need to get something off my chest before the toxic fumes from Owen's butt knock me out. I didn't come here for the money. I mean, yeah, it would be great to have a hundred grand to fall back on, but I came because of another reason. I'm looking for someone." He waved his hand in front of his face to disperse the fart some more. "Kami dammit, Big O, you could have cracked the window or something!"

"All right, any questions?" Either getting none or not waiting to get any, he moved on. "Let's find your cabins."

They eventually followed Chris to a couple of cabins where he split them up girls on one side boys on the other. Naruto would be bunking with the Screaming Gopher guys due to there being an odd number of guys.

"I call top bunk!" Naruto said with a huge smile as he climbed up top.

"Ah, man," Owen grumbled. "I wanted top."

"Call it revenge for the confessional." Owen shrunk at Naruto's glare and apologized while nervously laughing. "Besides, I wouldn't get up top if I was you." If these beds were anything like the Dock of Shame, Naruto was sure that Owen's weight would cause them to collapse and crush whatever unfortunate soul was under him. The sound of a guy screaming could be heard coming from next door, prompting a group of the male Screaming Gophers to rush to the door and see what happened. Seeing Cody outside, chewing grass probably gave them a clue as to what did.

"Um... Where's the outlet?" Lindsay asked as she exited the cabin. "I want to plug in my straightening iron."

"There are some in the communal toilets just across the way." Chris directed the camera to a building a good few feet away.

"Communal bathrooms? But I'm not Catholic."

"Not communion! Communal."

"It means we shower together," Gwen explained before throwing a final word out for the airhead, "idiot." Lindsay's eyes began to water as she cried in disbelief. Naruto, Trent, Noah, and Owen hung their heads out to watch the conversation before the latter chuckled.

"I'm glad I'm in a cabin with just guys." Getting a deadpan look from his fellow cabinmates, Owen tried to explain what he meant. "I mean, NO! I didn't mean it like that!"

"Sure you didn't, Big Guy." Naruto patted the big man on his back.

"I like chicks! I just don't want to sleep near them! I mean..."

"Stop digging yourself in a deeper hole. I saw the way you were acting around Justin." Owen slowly walked behind the group with a sad look.

"Is there a chaperone of any kind in this facility?" (Geoff)

"You're all 16 years old, which is just the age of any Counselor-in-Training at any other regular camp. So other than myself, you'll be unsupervised. You have half an hour to unpack and meet me back at the main lodge starting, (pause) now."

The sound of a scream caught most of the campers off guard, revealing that it was coming from the Screaming Gophers' cabin. Or, more precisely, the girls' side.

"Oh man, that white girl can scream," Leshawna as everyone poked their heads into the room. Lindsay stood atop a chair, pointing towards a cockroach that scuttled on the floor in front of her.

"Kill it! KILL IT!"

D.J. soon followed suit and screamed before jumping onto a nearby bed and breaking it.

"And there goes my bed," Gwen said with a sigh.

A flurry of feet either tried to stomp on the bug or jumping onto the nearby furniture. Duncan raised an ax that just so happened to be lying around and swung it down. He smiled, expecting to see a bisected cockroach when he lifted the shaft, only to frown once he lifted it. Naruto held something in his hands and chuckled.

"What the hell were you guys about to do?" He turned a blank stare at his former underling. "And an ax... Really?" He held his hand out an open window and threw whatever was in it outside.

"What? It was the closest thing I could find."

"Listen up!" a middle-aged black man yelled out. He wore an apron over a yellow shirt with green pants. "I'm going to serve it three times a day, and you're going to eat it three times a day. Grab a tray, get your food, and sit your butts down NOW!"

Beth, a little concerned about what was in the food, timidly asked, "Does this have the basic food groups?"

"Yeah. I get hypoglycemic easily if I don't get any sugar." Harold failed to notice the twitch in the cook's left eye while he spoke.

"You'll get a whole lotta shut the heck up!" Harold ran from the man after that outburst.

"Have a cow, man," Owen joked. It was unfortunate that Chef Hatchet heard that even as low as he said it.

"What was that? I didn't hear you, Fat Boy." The cook curled his finger inward, telling Owen to come closer.

"I... didn't say anything important."

"I'm sure you didn't. You!" He gestured to Noah, who was next in line. "Give me your plate."

Noah did so only to get a weird sight: instead of staying on his plate, his food moved as if to jump and clung back to the scoop that it had occupied only ten seconds earlier. Next to Noah were Leshawna and Eva, the former of the two had tried to chat with the bodybuilder. "Oh, it's gonna be like that, is it?" Leshawna said as she had gotten only an empty stare in return.

"Excuse me," Lindsay stated as it was her and Gwen's turn to grab their lunch. "My nutritionist said I shouldn't eat white sugar, white flour, or like … dairy." Gwen took one look at the food and told her that there wasn't any need to worry as Chef grabbed a fly out of the air. Of course, that was when her food decided to move.

"I hate to be predictable and complain on the first day, but my food just … " Without warning, a meat tenderizer was brought down, splattering the contents of the plate everywhere. "Thanks," she said with a nervous smile as she walked away.

"Ah, man. My food," Naruto groaned as his … whatever it was that Chef had cooked jumped off his plate and scuttled away.

"Were you looking forward to eating that?" Cody only got a sly smile as his answer.

"Thankfully, I had anticipated Chris-Oji to skimp out on this game show, which is why I brought my food." Reaching into the backpack he had brought with him, Naruto pulled out a cup of instant noodles. "Tah-dah! Ichiraku-brand instant noodles. Miso-flavored with …" Reaching into his pack some more, he pulled out a flavor pack. "Extra pork flavoring."

" … How are you going to cook it? You have no hot water."

Naruto stared at his food before growling out, "Fuck."

Chris then took that moment to walk in. "Hey, Chris, do you think we could order a pizza?" A meat cleaver sailed through the air and deposited itself in the doorframe, causing Geoff to squeak. "You know what? Nevermind! It's cool, G! Brown slop is cool!"

"And tell that brat with the spiky hair that I see him over there with those noodles!"

"Well, tell your food to stay in my plate-tebayo!"

'Every minute I see more and more of his mother,' Chris thought to himself. "Your first challenge begins in one hour!"

"What are they going to make us do?" Katie asked D.J. The giant smiled reassuringly back at her. "I doubt it'll be anything that serious. Come on. It's our first challenge."

"Well … shit."

Everyone had gathered on the edge of the cliff in their swimsuits.

"This first challenge is three-fold. Your first task: to jump off this cliff into the lake."

"Sounds easy enough," Bridgette shrugged.

"If you look down, you'll see two target areas." A wide ring covered most of the cliff face with a smaller one posted in its center. "The wide area represents the spot you don't want to take. We kind of added some psychotic man-eating sharks." As the contestants watched, a couple of shark fins broke the water's surface as one jumped out, taking a chomp out of the air. "In the middle of that is a safe zone where you might want to land. It should be shark-free."

"And in the case that it isn't?" Naruto asked only to get a shrug in reply. Chris then held up some papers that an intern ran to him.

"At least you guys signed waivers, huh? That means that neither this show or I get sued." He then handed the paper to said intern, who ran back off-camera. "If you manage to survive, at the bottom sits a pile of crates full of supplies that you will need to build a hot tub for the second part of the challenge. The ones that can build a sweet hot tub will win the challenge while those who don't will be sending one home on the Dock of Shame."

"But what about Naruto?" Heather asked. "He's an independent, isn't he? How is this challenge going to affect him in any way?"

"He will be exempt from the second part of the challenge due to his independence. Unfortunately, he will still be on the chopping block either way."

"Pfft. That's lame."

"Yeah. Naru's an okay dude!" Owen pulled the blond into a headlock while lightly giving him a noogie. Naruto laughed as he playfully elbowed Owen in the stomach hard enough to get him to release him.

"Sorry. Rules are rules. Now, who's up first?"

"I'll go." Naruto stepped up and looked over the edge. "Bar the man-eating sharks; this doesn't look so bad." With a sigh and a slight chuckle, he closed his eyes and fell forward.

The others rushed to see if he survived and sighed in relief once he surfaced.

"WHOO! YEAH! GO, NARU!" Naruto could hear Owen's cheers from down in the lake before looking up and waving. A massive grin was plastered on his face as the boat pulled up.

He did not climb on, though, telling them that he would swim back to shore. "I've dealt with and have seen a lot worse."

He could swear he heard the sharks start to growl.

Next up was Bridgette, who, after the shock of watching a guy jump to his near-death, decided to steal her nerves. "I'll go next. It's just a drop into a lake filled with sharks." She peered over the edge and swallowed the lump in her throat. Calming herself, she jumped into the lake and landed in the safe zone though she wasn't as adventurous as Naruto and decided to take the boat ride back.

"I'm next!" Tyler soon followed after her, but fell onto the buoy and miraculously survived before sliding into the water. One by one, the rest of Bridgette's team followed suit.

Once it got to D.J., though, he refused to participate. "Uh-uh. No way, man, I'm not jumping."

"Scared of heights?"

"Yeah. Ever since I was a kid."

"That's okay, big guy, but unfortunately, that makes you a chicken." Chris placed a rubber chicken hat upon the gentle giant's head and clucked. "That means that the chicken path is thataway." He thumbed back towards an escalator down.

Next up was Ezekiel, who crashed into the side of the cliff, followed by Harold. Unfortunately for the latter, his legs were wide open. As he hit the surface of the water, his family jewels nearly shattered. Phantom pains struck each male there, causing them to either suck in their teeth or vocalize their pain (including the sharks for some odd reason). Harold screamed once more as he sank into the lake.

"Excuse me, Chris. I can't jump due to a medical reason." Courtney stood on the edge with her arms crossed.

"What's the condition?"

"A condition that prevents me from jumping off cliffs."

"That would mean that you forfeit the challenge. It might cost your team the win."

"That's a calculated risk. I've seen the others. They won't jump."

After placing the chicken cap on Courtney's head, the host then tallied up the score before realizing that there was one that didn't jump. Looking over, Chris noticed Sadie and Katie huddled together near Izzy.

"I'm not jumping without Katie." The two whined and begged that Chris place them together, much to the host's chagrin and reluctant acceptance.

"I'll switch places with her."

"Izzy, you're with the Screaming Gophers. Now then, if you two would." With a scream, the two jumped off the cliff and landed in the safe zone.

"That's nine jumps and two chickens. Screaming Gophers, if you win, you get a cart to load your crates."

The camera focused on the rest of the campers. "I'm not jumping," Heather put out there. "We're on national TV, and I don't want to get my hair wet."

"You're kidding, right?" Gwen asked with a raised eyebrow.

"If she's not doing it, then I'm not doing it." Lindsay shared a look and smile with Heather, only to back off when Leshawna got into the Asian girl's face.

"Oh, you're doing this even if I have to make you." The two glared at one another, not moving an inch from their spot.

"Says who?"

"Says me. I'm not losing this challenge just because you don't want to get your hair wet you spoiled little daddy's girl."

Elsewhere down by the lakeside, Naruto finished shaking his hair dry, making the girls drool at sight. While not being the most attractive (that honor going to Justin), he was not the least attractive there, and it showed.

He perked his head up and looked towards the sky. "What's wrong, Whiskers?"

"I sense a roast battle going on. As if two opposing forces are clashing right about now."

A silhouette that looked a lot like the only other Asian got thrown from the top of the cliff. It is landing in the safe zone. "Leshawna," she growled after spitting out a mouthful of water, "you are so dead."

"Hey! I threw you in the safe zone, didn't I? I just hope I can land in it too."

Leshawna jumped in, landing beside a glaring Heather.

"I thought this was a talent competition!" A subtle nudge from Chris knocked the airhead over the cliff. Gwen soon followed behind her, Cody, Izzy, and then Justin, who landed outside of the safe zone, following behind the goth.

"I'll save you, man!" Naruto yelled as he jumped into the lake and swam towards him. It was not needed, in any case. Once the sharks took a glance at their prey, they stopped in their tracks. "Ooookay." One brought him back to shore before turning their attention on the blond in the water and growling.

"Guess you guys still remember what I said earlier, huh?" Naruto chuckled before raising a hand and curling two fingers in towards himself in a taunting gesture. "Bring it."

The cameras then faced the confused campers as the sounds of fists impacting off flesh could be heard. Duncan palmed his face with a groan. "He always has to be the cool guy."

"Is he … seriously fighting off the sharks?" (Courtney)

"IS THAT ALL YOU GOT!? I'VE RAISED GOLDFISH WITH MORE BITE THAN YOU GUYS!"

"Yeah … Naruto's fighting off the sharks." Duncan sighed after giving that answer. "You always have to expect the unexpected with Whiskers."

It was now Beth's turn, but unfortunately, she could not go through with it and chickened out of the contest, causing both Cody and Leshawna to cluck like chickens. "That is so lame, right?" Lindsay asked Heather.

"Yeah. So lame.

Trent gave Owen a high-five before jumping in as well. "Okay, campers, there's only one person left, and you need one more person to jump to beat the Killer Bass. No pressure." Owen relaxed a bit only to stiffen once more when Chris went back on the latter. His team egged him on to jump.

"I am so going to die," the big guy muttered under his breath. "Here goes nothing!"

He sprinted towards the edge and leaped over it. "Oh, crap!"

Things went in a slo-mo vision for the rest of the Screaming Gophers. Especially Trent and Noah, who had yet to get out of the lake.

A massive tidal wave erupted from the point where Owen landed, capsizing the boat and throwing the shark (and Naruto) out of the water.

"Great going, Owen!" Naruto yelled out with a smile, although he frowned when he noticed Owen looking around. "What's wrong?"

"I think I lost my trunks."

Naruto walked behind the Killer Bass, said group walking behind the Screaming Gophers. The latter group, having won the challenge, carried the chests on carts provided by Chris. The former pushed their crates along the sand at a much slower pace.

"Mind if I take that from you?" he asked his fellow blonde.

"Um... Sure." Naruto smiled and picked the box up, giving Bridgette a bit of a reprieve. "Do you work out?"

"You can say that." He shifted the box a little to get a better grip. "I train a bit in martial arts."

"Like Bruce Lee? I love those movies."

Naruto sheepishly chuckled, his face reddening slightly. "Well, you're kind of right. My dad always instilled that I should fight for things to protect."

The two talked for a while, not paying attention to their surroundings.

"I, uh ... have to go to the bathroom." Tyler left after getting approval from the rest of his teammates. Katie and Sadie soon followed behind.

"Hey, Sadie, do you feel something ... burning or itching on your butt?"

"Yeah. It's, like, totally itching." And every step the two took made it worse. Naruto and Bridgette just so happened to stand behind the two overhearings their conversation. The two shared a glance before the latter spoke up.

"Those plants you two squatted over? Were they oval-shaped and to a point? Kind of had ridges?"

"Yeah?"

Naruto then decided to explain what he and Bridgette were thinking. "Yeah," he said, drawing out the word, "you two were peeing on poison ivy."

Chris pulled up not that long ago on an ATV to see what was taking the group so long. He snickered at the duo. They were now rubbing their rumps on the sand to get rid of the itch.

"Should we leave them for a bit?"

"Sure thi - OH MY GOD WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR FACE!" Naruto stared at the girl's pulsating eye.

"A bug flew into it. I think it bit me. Is it that bad?"

"No!" Bridgette slapped her hand over Naruto's mouth, anticipating that he was about to say something that would potentially hurt the girl's feelings (which he was). "It's fine. Just, can you see out of it?"

"No. I think it's swollen shut. Let's hurry up and get the last part of the challenge out of the way."

The Bass finally caught up with the Gophers (minus the two best friends who were taking a bit of a break) and started to build their tubs. Naruto was pulled to the side, though, as not to show favoritism between the two teams and watched as the two yes completed the task at hand.

On one side, the Screaming Gophers worked as a team, leading to the hot tub coming out looking great. On the other, it was clear that the Killer Bass was going to send someone home.

It didn't help that Courtney was ordering other people what to do instead of assisting. And from the looks of things, he was sure she would be the first to be voted off the island. Her teammates were giving her dirty looks as soon as she looked away to turn her attention to her next victim.

It wasn't long before the challenge was over. "That's looking a little rough," Naruto muttered to himself. The Killer Bass' looked as if to be expected by a group of kids trying to make something quick. And the winners were decided once the inspection was over, as the latter fell apart upon closer inspection. "It looks like the winners are the Screaming Gophers! That means tonight will be the night for the Bass' first eliminations. See you guys at the campfire tonight."

Owen cheered, nude from taking a dip in the tub. He pulled Heather and Lindsay into a hug. The former didn't seem as enthusiastic about it, however.

The group sat at the table while eating their lunch and tried to determine who would get sent home. "Well, I think it should either be Princess or the brick house here."

"What? What about Naruto? He isn't even a part of our team!"

"Last I checked, Whiskers jumped, which is more than I can say about you. Besides, I like my options with this guy better," Duncan said with a quick thumb back towards D.J.

"But you need me! I'm the only one here with -"

"We know!" Bridgette cut in. "You're the only one here with C.I.T. training."

"And even then, training and doing the thing you're getting trained to do are two different things-tebayo."

Courtney sat back with a frown.

"That's enough prison food for me. I'm going to go take a nap."

"I don't know why we lost either, eh. The Gophers have way more girls on their team than we do."

The sound around the table died quickly with Ezekiel's outburst.

"You wanna run that by me again?" Naruto asked with a strained smile upon his face. "It sounded like bullshit dribbled out of your mouth just now."

"Yeah. There are way more girls on their team, so I don't know why we lost. I mean, my dad always taught me that men are stronger and better at sports than girls."

"I thought that was what you said." Bridgette and Eva were about to get close, but Naruto beat them to it. A kick under the table knocked Ezekiel's chair over and sent the home-schooled boy to the ground. Faster than anyone could see, the whisker-cheeked blonde brought his foot down on his chest.

"Listen here you little creep, one thing I'm not going to do is stand here and let you badmouth women just because you've had no contact outside that little rock you crawled out from under."

"Whoa! Whoa! Chill, dude." Geoff tried to ease the situation before it got worse. "Maybe just take a minute to calm down."

Naruto growled before easing up.

LATER THAT NIGHT AT THE CAMPFIRE PIT

"Dude, you've got a lot to learn about the outside world," Duncan told Ezekiel. The eyes of every girl had him in their focus, and Naruto was no different.

"I understand the girls, but what got you so hot?" D.J. asked.

"Well, the thing is ... What he said made me think about my kaa-san. She's one of the strongest people I know." At D.J.'s confused stare, Naruto sheepishly grinned. "Kaa-san means Mother."

"Oh. But yeah, I get you. If someone said, my mama was weak..." Nine times out of ten, they'd probably get killed. There were just some things you just did not do. Messing with a mama from Jamaica was one of them.

"When I call your name, please come and receive your marshmallows. Anyone who doesn't receive a marshmallow will walk the Dock of Shame and ride the Boat of Losers. You will not be able to come back to the island. Ever.

"When I call your name, come get your marshmallow. First up, Geoff." The boy whooped and stood before Chris, who placed a marshmallow on his stick. "Naruto, Bridgette, Katie, Sadie, Duncan, D.J., Harold, Tyler, Eva." The final two, Courtney and Ezekiel, nervously turned towards one another and gulped. Chris raised his finger in the air dramatically before pointing towards the two of them. The finger moved between the two before finally settling down after a good minute on the tan-skinned counselor-in-training. "Courtney, come get your marshmallow."

A breath escaped Courtney's lips as Ezekiel hung his head in shame. "Don't forget your bag," Naruto told him, handing it to him with a smile.

"What did you do?" Duncan whispered as he cupped his mouth, getting Naruto's smile to widen.

"Well, since he raised such a big stink, I decided to return the favor. When he checks to see if everything is in there, he's going to need to take a shower afterward."

"Sneaky," Duncan smirked. "When does it go off?" Within seconds, a cry echoed from the boat. If Naruto's smile grew any more significant, Duncan would swear it would split his face in two. If anyone looked back, they would see an equal-sized one on the punk's face. Chris gathered everyone's attention by clearing his throat.

"Now then. Since Ezekiel has been eliminated, Naruto will now take his place on the Killer Bass team." The team then started to congratulate him, some patting him on the back.

(Confessional - Naruto)

"No one disrespects my kaa-san but me," Naruto said with his arms crossed, his eyes closed, and a frown on his face. They suddenly shot open once he realized what he said. "Uh... You guys are going to edit that out, right?"

(Tape Break - Gwen)

"Well, this camp pretty much still sucks," the girl sighed before rubbing her shoulders. "But since I'm here, I might as well win the money."

Three days had passed since the first challenge, and everyone was sleeping in bed. Well, everyone except a certain blonde who had decided to run in the morning.

For those that were still in sleep's warm embrace, that would soon be disrupted. Within seconds, Chris walked towards the cabins and pulled out a megaphone and an airhorn. He then pulled the trigger, releasing a loud honk that woke the rest of the campers.

"OW!" Leshawna groaned, having hit her head before sticking it out a window. "It's seven o'clock in the morning! Some of us are still trying to sleep!"

Everyone stood outside, waiting on their next challenge once they got dressed. "I hope you slept well," Chris said with a grin.

"Hi, Chris. You look buff in those shorts," Heather told him. Naruto rolled his eyes at the girl's attitude. 'Like Chris-Oji would let you butter him up like that.' Well, thinking back on it, Naruto was sure that the host would let her do something like that. Though he probably would still make it even by torturing her along with the other contestants.

"I hope you guys are ready because your challenge begins in one minute."

"I don't know how that's supposed to work out if we haven't had breakfast yet," Owen pointed out, getting another chuckle out of the host.

"Oh. You'll get breakfast all right. After you complete a 20K run around the lake."

Eva growled as she pulled back her fist, intent on clobbering Chris. "I bet you think this is funny, huh? Well, you'll see how funny it is when I'm done with you!"

Duncan, Geoff, and Naruto held her back, the former two grabbing an arm. Naruto grabbed her around the waist to keep her from getting them disqualified. "Keep yourself under control," he grunted. "If you don't, then there's a chance he's gonna make it so that we skip the challenge and go straight into elimination-dattebayo."

(Confessional - Courtney)

"That girl Eva needs to keep her temper in check," the former C.I.T. told the audience. "It's only been one day, and she's already thrown her suitcase out the window and broken the lock on one of the bathrooms."

"Okay, everybody. On your marks... Get set... GO!" While some went in strong, others lagged on account of exhaustion due to lack of sleep.

Naruto watched as his fellow heavyset blonde friend wheeze. "Can't... run anymore... due to condition."

He then fell to his knees before lapping at a small stream.

"Are you sure that water's safe to drink?" Naruto asked as Heather rolled her eyes at the scene.

"He wouldn't be in this situation if he knew to watch how much food he eats."

"Oh, you are just a ray of sunshine, aren't you?" he frowned as he watched the girl step on her teammate.

"She's a bitch is what she is." Naruto turned towards the new voice to see one of the only other dark-skinned female contestants, Leshawna. The heavyset African-Canadian was trying to catch her breath against a tree. "She's a skinny... spoiled... I'm too tired to even finish that thought."

Naruto frowned as he left the two to meet up with the rest of his team. 'What are you planning, Chris-Oji?'

Eventually, a good majority of the Screaming Gophers made it to the mess hall with the Killer Bass not too far behind. Naruto sat at the table with Duncan, Courtney, and DJ drumming his finger as they waited on the rest of their team.

"CLEAR A TABLE!" Owen yelled as he dragged in an unconscious Noah. He threw the small teenager on a table before giving the said boy some chest compressions to restart his heart. "I AM NOT GOING TO LOSE YOU!" Owen puckered his lips before leaning in to provide Noah with CPR, only for the latter to wake up at that moment and scream in terror.

"What took you so long?" Courtney yelled at Harold, who was clutching his chest in pain. "You're the last person to get here!"

"Wait, if they were the last ones here..." Gwen muttered to herself before her eyes widened in realization. "That means that we won the challenge!"

"Hold on before you guys celebrate," Chris told them. "Well, because that wasn't the challenge."

"Figures," Naruto said with a sigh. "That was too easy for us to go through."

"How can you tell?" Bridgette asked, getting a shrug out of spiky blonde teen.

"Well, my sensei, er, my teacher always said to expect the unexpected. If something looks too good to be true, it usually is." Naruto forgot no one spoke Japanese here. Except maybe Harold, but only because he seemed like the otaku type, amongst other things.

Chris pulled back a curtain, revealing a table full of food that made the campers gasp.

(Confessional - Gwen)

"After a week of eating nothing but brown slop, it was good to see some actual food," Gwen said with her arms crossed into the camera.

(Tape Break - Owen)

The overweight teen sat there and wiped a tear out of his eyes at the sight of the food. "How I missed actual food. I... I need a moment."

Owen blew his nose into a handkerchief.

"GO! GO! GO! GO! GO!" The men of the Killer Bass (with some men from the Screaming Gophers, plus Izzy for some odd reason) cheered on Naruto and Owen, who were in an eating contest of how many of their favorite foods could they eat. By far, Naruto was leading by at least ten bowls of ramen noodles, though Owen was quickly catching up.

"How many bowls of noodles did we have catered, Chef?" Chris asked the cook, who was equally stunned, disgusted, and a bit impressed by how the whiskered teen packed the food away.

"It was supposed to be only ten!"

"Can't... eat... anymore," Owen said as he put his half-finished plate down.

"And Naruto is the winner!" Duncan declared as he raised Naruto's hand in the air.

"SPEECH! SPEECH! SPEECH! SPEECH!" Naruto held a finger up in the air as his cheeks puffed out. He let out a massive burp, causing his audience to go silent for a split second. "YEAAAAAAH!"

"Ah, man. I had a few bucks riding on Owen to win," Cody grumbled. "He just seemed like the sure thing."

"Like I told Geoff a couple days ago, never bet against Whiskers," Duncan chuckled as he and the said teen counted their money. "Because somehow, you're always going to lose."

Naruto noticed the glance of Heather and gave the girl a wide grin, only for her to scoff in disgust and look away. He felt someone sit down on his lap before turning to see a giggling orange-haired girl. "That was sooo cool," the girl giggled.

"Um... Sure. Why are you in my lap?"

"I just wanted to see something." The girl then started to rub the lines on his face, getting a frown out of its owner.

"Stop that. My whiskers don't do what you think they probably do." She still tried to do so, getting him to swat her hands away.

"Okay, time for your real challenge, campers; it's an Awake-a-thon!"

"There it is." Naruto moved his hand away from the girl, though she would put it back on her thigh.

"You mean to tell me that the 20K run around the lake and the turkey dinner was a set-up to make us have a competition where we have to stay up to win?" Gwen asked.

"Yeah."

"Man, you're good."

Trent stood next to Gwen as the others exited the building. "How long before the others are knocked out?" he asked the goth girl. Gwen watched as Owen left the building, already in an exhausted state.

"I give it about an hour before one of us drops... Maybe less."

Twelve hours had passed, and no one had dropped much to Gwen's surprise. "Twelve hours without any sleep? I can do that in my sleep!" Owen yelled before falling to the ground. A light snore escaped the heavyset teen's mouth.

"Big man's out," Naruto said with a chuckle. His eyes scanned over the other campers, momentarily setting on Trent and Gwen, who were chatting each other up to keep from falling asleep.

He felt someone sit next to him and smiled. "Yo. What's up?" he asked his fellow blonde Bridgette.

"Nothing much. I just saw those two asking each other questions to keep each other up and decided to try out their idea." Naruto nodded in understanding.

"So, favorite color?" he started.

"Blue. What's yours?"

"Orange," Naruto said as he puffed out his chest.

"Any particular reason?"

"Well, my mom's natural hair color is red despite being Asian, and my dad's color is blonde. Not to mention, I love the color that the leaves change in October." Naruto and Bridgette talked for a good bit about themselves. The former didn't notice the set of eyes that were on him, trying to remember if they knew him or not.

It wasn't necessary, however. What was important was to see if anyone was willing to agree to an alliance with the young woman. And she saw the perfect candidate... who was soon joined by a less than stellar candidate, but beggars couldn't be choosers.

(Confessional - Heather)

"There was something about that blonde whiskered doofus that made me want to ask if he would want to ally with me," the snooty girl asked. "But then again, I'm pretty sure that he would be against it since he wants to play (air quote) 'fair and square?'

"So, I decided to go with someone desperate enough to win and dumb enough to fall for an alliance when I happened upon these two."

"Lindsay! Beth!" Heather called out to the two. "Can I talk to you two for a sec?"

"Sure!" The two gathered with the former.

"I have a strategy to get me and two others into the Final Three here on the island," she explained. "And I just so happened to pick you guys."

"Really?"

"You should know that this is an issue of trust. And I place my trust in the two of you."

"YOU'LL BE SOOOOOORRY!" Naruto yelled out before closing his mouth in confusion. "Why did I say that?"

"Okay... Back to what I was saying, trust is a two-way streak, understand?" At both girl's nods, Heather smiled. "So, you'll do everything I say then?"

The girls nodded their heads once more before Lindsay turned to Beth. "I can't believe we're going to make it to the Final Three!" Her accompanying squee made Heather cringe as the sounds of chalkboards being scratched assaulted her eardrums.

"Speaking of alliances, do you know who I think is cute?" Lindsay asked as her attention turned back towards the rest of the group. Following her line of sight, Heather jumped in to put a stop to it.

"No dating members of the other team! It's against the rules to date between teams."

"But why not?"

"Well, rules are rules, and you do remember what I just said about trust, right? I mean, you're welcome to leave the alliance, but I can't save you from elimination if you do."

Lindsay sighed and agreed to Heather's terms. Naruto couldn't help but overhear the conversation and frowned, catching Bridgette's attention. "What's wrong?" she asked.

"Well, Heather's got Lindsay and Beth into an alliance, but to me, it doesn't sound like it'd help anyone but her." Not to mention that there was something off-putting about Heather. "Just... Keep an eye on her." Maybe it was because she reminded him too much of those girls in school.

"Um... Okay."

"Congrats on getting to the 24-hour mark, campers. Which means that it's time to take it up a notch with..." Chris pulled the tarp off a nearby pile of books once Chef joined the cast while wearing a pink sheep costume and carrying a harp. "Fairy tales!"

"Oh, you have got to be kidding."

"I doubt it," Naruto muttered to himself after Gwen's comment.

"Once upon a time, in this boring kingdom, there was a boring village full of boring children." One by one, the campers started to drift off, some due to the story, others to a hallucination of Chef in a ballerina's tutu throwing sleeping powder in their faces. It wasn't long before Bridgette drifted off as well, placing her head on Naruto's shoulders.

"How are you awake?" Geoff asked his spiky-haired fellow blond.

"Training," Naruto answered. "I would spend at least two, maybe three days of training myself. I mean, I probably spent more, but by then, everything blacks out.

Cody rested his head against something soft before waking back up and coughing out Owen's farts, much to the disgust of the people surrounding him.

DJ tied himself to a tree as a way to resist the effects, only to fall asleep and cause said tree to fall to the ground. "Timber," Gwen tiredly called out.

It had now reached nearly 40 hours since the challenge started. "We should talk about our strategy," Heather said as she nudged Lindsay. The girl toppled over, however, so Heather then tried to get Beth's attention. Unfortunately, Beth was also out.

Gwen and Trent spent the hour trying to ask each other questions about one another when Gwen started to get kind of sleepy. "Don't fall asleep," the musician attempted to get her attention. "Okay... Um... Favorite movie scene?"

"You're going to think it's cheesy, but that kiss at the end of that road trip movie. You know, the one with three girls and that guy?"

Trent chuckled. "I know. You actually liked that movie?" Unfortunately for them, and the others that were still awake, they could only watch as Owen sleep-walked in front of them in the buff. Trent and Gwen's eyes strayed towards his discarded clothes before focusing back on the nude Owen.

"Look at him," Gwen pointed out to Trent, waking up Leshawna. "He's like a statue. He hasn't moved in 50 hours." They were talking about Justin, who was standing with his hands on his hips. His eyes, while seemingly awake, were revealed to be painted once Gwen touched his cheeks.

"HEY! HE'S CHEATING!" Eva called out.

"No way!" Chris chuckled as he observed the model. "That's so cool, but you're out, by the way." Justin's shoulders slumped.

Another 24 hours had passed, and Naruto watched as Duncan placed Harold's hand in a mug of hot water. Harold sighed as his crotch grew wet, and Naruto snickered. "Oh gross, he actually peed his pants," the punk said with a laugh, causing Harold to wake up and cover himself. Noah and Cody could be seen spooning before the former kissed the latter on the ear, causing both to wake up with a scream.

"I'd kill for a coffee right now," Gwen groaned with a yawn.

"What is the matter with you people?" Chris then walked towards the group holding a cup of coffee. He then looked down to see Gwen clinging on his leg and reaching up for the container.

"Come on, man. You gotta hook me up! I'll even eat the grind!"

"All right, you six stay with me. The rest, go and take a shower. You stink!" And like that, Harold was gone. After taking a sip, Chris turned to face the camera. "I didn't want it to come to this. I told Chef Hatchet that it was not going to have to come to this, but..." He pulled out a massive book, detailing the history of Canada.

"Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no." Naruto's eyes widened at the prospect of learning something. "Why? Why would you do this to us-dattebayo!?"

"What's wrong with him?" Eva asked as she lifted her eyebrow.

"Naruto hates studying and anything educational," Duncan explained. "He skipped school constantly, which ended up with him in juvie, where we met."

"And I would have gotten away with it, too, if my truant officer didn't have the blood of a bloodhound running through his veins."

"Chapter one: The Mighty Beaver. Our national mascot and a "dam" (damn) beautiful hat."

"Duncan... Eva... You're going to have to go on without me... I can't take it any longer!"

"Come on, dude! Stay awake! We're in this to win it!" Duncan raised his open palm before smacking it across Naruto's face back and forth. "Wake... Up... Wake... Up... Wake... Up..." With each word, Duncan's palm slapped his former boss' cheek.

"STOP SLAPPING ME-TEBAYO!" Naruto yelled as his pupils burst into flames.

Chris read to near the end of chapter one, losing Heather and Eva in the process. Finally, Trent had enough as well, falling flat on his face despite Gwen's protest.

"Now it's down to the final three," Chris told the audience. "Who's next to fall asleep?"

"I think..." Gwen paused her sentence to yawn into her hand. "I think Blondie's asleep." She snapped her fingers in front of Naruto's eyes, who remain unresponsive. The said teen fell backward with a snore.

"I'd wait before I wake him up," Chris warned the interns. "He has a nasty habit of being active even in his sleep."

After a quick shower, Naruto headed towards his team's cabin. "How close are they to finishing up?" DJ asked, getting a shrug from Naruto.

"Before I left, they were giving the remaining two a bathroom break. It's up for grabs now who's going to win it. Now then, I need to get some sleep." Naruto ignored the things being thrown out of the cabin next door. "Wake me up when we're having the elimination ceremony."

The Killer Bass were gathered around the campfire once more. Everyone had received a marshmallow except for Harold and Eva. "And the final marshmallow goes to..." Chris paused for a dramatic effect. "Harold."

"What? You guys voted for me!?" Eva yelled. "You know what? Who even needs this stupid show anyway!?" Eva kicked Chris in the shins on her way to the docks.

Naruto watched the boat drift away and turned his attention back to his team and sighed.

(Confessional - Naruto)

"That thing with Eva seemed a bit too convenient for the Screaming Gophers," Naruto said into the camera. "Don't get me wrong; I knew she had a bit of an anger problem. But to be voted off seems like someone is trying to play us like a fiddle. And Heather was a bit too friendly for someone that before the contest walked over Owen."

(Tape Break - Heather)

"That was too easy," Heather grinned as she crossed her arms. "They got rid of one of their more competent players. Now then, they just need to get rid of more, and I've got this in the bag."

(Tape Break - Naruto)

"Has anyone seen Owen since the challenge ended? I know he's not on my team, but still..."

It would be some time before Owen was found outside a cave. The crew could see that he was thrown, but the culprits had been long gone before then.

CHAPTER END

Okay. That's one of the many ideas floating around in my head done. Now I need to deal somehow with the other millions, like a Naruto/Glitch Techs crossover that popped up when I saw the show or the Persona/Naruto crossover that The Swordslinger proposed a couple of years ago.

Eventually, I'll get back to Once a Loud. Speaking of, I've gotten mostly positive reviews for the story, with a few complaints about the fact that Naruto has no whisker marks. With one going so far as to say that I am baiting people to read my stories by saying that he is in the story when it's an OC despite not reading. I want to clarify that while he does not have his signature birthmarks, it is indeed Naruto. He just has a more realistic appearance.

Although, I do like your idea of Naruto either being a novelist or a martial artist. My only problem is that the episode you were talking about was filler and considered non-canon.

Change the guy's look around, and people try to jump down your throat for it, amirite?