Chapter 15: Hot and Cold

After Calvin and Hobbes were sucked into the Li'l Doomsday Ship, it went dark for them. Eventually, they came to, but they found themselves trapped in a capsule.

"What the?!" Calvin remarked as he pounded on the glass, "Phooey! We're stuck in here!"

"I'm surprised we're still alive." Hobbes said.

"Do you have to make an overly pessimistic comment every time we're in this type of situation?" Calvin asked annoyed.

"I mean, if you weren't always putting us in these situations I wouldn't say anything." Hobbes replied back.

"Oh please! All these situations aren't entirely my fault!" Calvin shot back in defense.

"Well you getting involved with the local mafia was definitely your fault." Hobbes replied back.

"Well that riot started because you pushed me out of that tree!" Calvin retorted.

"What about several years back when we were having dinner with Galaxoid and Nebular and you nearly destroyed their home planet?"

"That was unintentional! Besides, you were the reason that missile got launched in the first place!"

"And what about that time you tried to launch an uprising in North Korea?"

"I was bamboozled! Besides, you were the one that nearly burned the whole neighborhood down with your mishandling of the fireworks!"

"And what about when you nearly caused Rosalyn's boyfriend to break his neck?"

"How was I supposed to know he wasn't gonna look where he was going?!"

Before Hobbes could respond, he heard rumbling from above.

"Do you hear that?" He asked as the two listened.

Calvin listened, and his eyes widened when he heard it.

"Oh no... Not that... Anything but that..." Calvin whimpered.

"What? Are they gonna kill us? How do we die? Fire? Water? Gas? Starvation? Beheading?" Hobbes asked nervously.

"Oh, they're doing something much worse than killing us..." Calvin said.

"What is it then?" Hobbes asked confused.

Just then, Duplicate 2, Rufus, and Donald came down on some sort of elevator, with disco music blasting, and the three of them were jamming out to it.

"You think that disco music is worse than death?" Hobbes remarked bemused.

"C'mon furball! You know I hate anything that was popular in the 70's!" Calvin replied back annoyed.

"Ah yes, and I'll note that and add it to the file where I'm expected to know how you've wanted to have a flamethrower since you were two..." Hobbes said rolling his eyes.

While the other three continued dancing, Calvin was banging on the glass.

"HEY! DUPE! CUT THAT JUNK OUT! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO HATE 70'S MUSIC!" Calvin yelled.

The three tried to enjoy themselves, but eventually, Calvin's banging and his various threats were getting very annoying.

"Alright guys, let's cut the music for now." Duplicate 2 said as he shut off the music.

"Took you long enough..." Calvin grumbled.

"Well hello Calvin, funny seeing you and the tiger again..." Duplicate 2 grinned as he walked over to the capsule.

"How on earth did you get this anyway? I thought we finished you off in downtown days ago!" Calvin inquired.

"Well Calvin, once again, you've clearly underestimated the sheer amount of power and technology that I have thanks to being acquainted with Dr. Scientist." Duplicate 2 replied.

"This is his as well?" Hobbes asked.

"Well yeah, who else did you expect to build it?" Duplicate 2 asked, as if it was obvious.

"I dunno, this looks more like one of those spaceships that aliens have kidnapped me in before." Calvin remarked.

"It's not that big you know..." Duplicate 2 said.

"Yeah! This is what the boss is giving to his kid for his next birthday!" Rufus exclaimed.

"And he wanted us to try it out!" Donald added in.

"It's pretty cool. Wouldn't you say?" Duplicate 2 asked.

"Considering that you've captured us and imprisoned us in this thing, I'm gonna say no to that." Hobbes replied.

"Yeah, maybe if we were in here by our own free will, I'd say the opposite." Calvin said in agreement.

"Whatever..." Duplicate 2 said rolling his eyes, "But now that I've got you guys in my clutches, I can finally put an end to your little quest, and then I'll be able to become the right hand man of Dr. Scientist and RULE THE WORLD!" Duplicate 2 laughed.

"That got dark fast..." Hobbes remarked.

"What about us?" Donald asked.

"Oh, uh... You guys will probably get promoted to a higher rank or something..." Duplicate 2 said, brushing it off.

"Oh boy!" Rufus said as he and Donald high-fived.

"So what are you gonna do with us?" Calvin asked.

"Well, I'm glad you asked! Because right now, this bad boy is on track to fly right over a place that is really, really cold... Oh, and it also has a lot of snow and that as well..." Duplicate 2 began.

"And let me guess, you're gonna drop us out of this capsule and into that arctic wasteland so we'll freeze to death?" Hobbes asked.

"Oh come on! You couldn't of let me say it?!" Duplicate 2 exclaimed annoyed.

"I mean it became pretty obvious what you were gonna do to us after you told us where we're gonna be flying over." Calvin remarked.

"Oh shut up! You guys act like you know everything!" Duplicate 2 shot back.

"We don't know everything..." Calvin began, "Only I know everything there is to know in the world! I'm a card carrying certified genius!" He exclaimed proudly.

Hobbes facepalmed at this remark.

"Oh please, I think Rufus and Donald combined are smarter than you." Duplicate 2 remarked.

"I highly doubt that." Calvin retorted.

"Says the kid who thought Chef Boyardee was our first president and that the Cold War was a war that was fought by people trying to give each other colds..." Hobbes muttered.

Just then, the giant screen in the room started making a large beeping noise, noting that there was an incoming video call coming in from Dr. Scientist. Duplicate 2 ran up to the control board and hit a button, accepting the call, and Dr. Scientist appeared on screen.

"Hello? Duplicate 2? Is that you?" Dr. Scientist asked.

"The one and only." Duplicate 2 responded.

"Good, good. Did you get them yet?"

"Yep! They're stuck in the capsule and ready to be dropped off in the tundra!"

"Brilliant! After that, our plans should be able to go without any issue!"

"Don't count on it you demented doofus!" Calvin yelled out, but the two ignored him.

"Rufus and Donald haven't done anything terribly stupid, so as long as they don't screw anything up, we should be good."

"Excellent. I'm finishing up an invention that was made possible by the Imaginfier. It'll be dangerous to anyone who dares to challenge it's power once completed..."

"Cool, what does it do?"

"A lot of things. It's power will be unimaginable... and will make taking over the world look easy! And ruling, EVEN EASIER! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Ding-Dong!

"Ah crud, I forgot that I was having my Chinese food delivered. I gotta go, have fun dumping those two morons into the arctic!"

And with that, Dr. Scientist hung up.

"Huh! Him mentioning Chinese food reminds me that we haven't had lunch yet! I'm gonna go fix it up, can you two idiots guard the capsule?" Duplicate 2 asked to Rufus and Donald.

"You can count on us other boss!" Rufus exclaimed as he and Donald saluted.

"Good, I'll be back soon with lunch." Duplicate 2 said as he hopped on the elevator contraption and went up.

"This will be easy, those two guys are trapped in that glass thingy, so there's no way they'll get out!" Donald exclaimed.

"Yeah! The other boss is gonna be so proud of us once he gets back!" Rufus said in agreement.

However, an hour went by, and Duplicate 2 had not yet returned.

"He must be cooking up a five-course meal." Hobbes remarked.

"I doubt it. Just because he's a Duplicate of mine doesn't mean he's a chef." Calvin replied back.

Rufus and Donald had now fallen asleep, and it didn't seem like Duplicate 2 was going to come back anytime soon, mainly because he was struggling trying to cook a meal.

Suddenly, an idea came to Calvin.

"Hobbes, I think I've found our way out of here." Calvin said proudly as he grabbed out the ring box, and turned it back into the box, and jumped in.

"I'm surprised that they didn't take that from us." Hobbes remarked as Calvin searched inside it.

"Think of it, they're too stupid to know of it's capabilities and improvements." Calvin remarked as he reappeared with the Transmogrifier Gun, and turned the box back into the small ring box and put it back in his pocket.

"How many times now has this gun saved our butts?" Hobbes asked.

"Too many to count." Calvin replied as he shot it at the glass, and it turned into a rock, thus freeing the duo.

Rufus and Donald were still fast asleep and didn't hear anything. Calvin and Hobbes sneaked towards the control panel with the screen showing a map of where the Li'l Doomsday Ship was currently at.

"So it looks like we've made it to the area they've been talking about." Hobbes remarked as the map was showing an all-white land covering, "Looks like we're near Greenland."

"Greenland?! If it's all cold and snowy why on earth would they call it that?! That's false advertising!" Calvin exclaimed, pounding his fist on the control panel.

However, when this happened, a disco ball appeared, and disco music started blasting again.

"Great work..." Hobbes said sarcastically.

"Well how was I supposed to know what that button did?!" Calvin shot back in defense.

This of course, awoke Rufus and Donald.

"Hey! You guys weren't supposed to get out!" Rufus exclaimed.

"The other boss isn't gonna like this. Looks like we'll gotta take care of this ourselves..." Donald said as he cracked his knuckles and began to approach the duo along with Rufus.

In the process, they kicked the rock over right by Calvin as they began to close in on them.

Calvin looked at it, and then realized that a golden opportunity was presenting itself, and a sly grin developed over his face.

Meanwhile upstairs, Duplicate 2 was unsurprisingly, still struggling to make a decent meal.

"Gah! This is hopeless! I should've sprung for some burgers before we left!" Duplicate 2 exclaimed exasperated.

Then, he heard a bunch of ruckus from down below.

"What the?! How did they get out?!" Duplicate 2 exclaimed confused as he got on the elevator contraption and went down, to see Rufus and Donald running for their lives, while Calvin was chasing them around with a flamethrower.

His look turned into one of horror as he saw the room turning into a state of disarray.

Calvin was having the time of his life chasing the henchmen with the flamethrower, though one of the flames caused one of the main control boards to catch on fire.

At this point, a siren began going off, and a bright red light began blinking throughout the room as the chaos continued.

"Good thing I decided to sit this one out..." Hobbes said sighing.

At this point, Duplicate 2 lunged at Calvin, tackling him, and knocking the flamethrower out of Calvin's hands.

"Oh come on, I was having fun!" Calvin said annoyed.

"Yeah, well, fun's over." Duplicate 2 said coldly, but then Hobbes pounced on Duplicate 2, breaking Calvin free, who grabbed the flamethrower and started blasting it again, only for it to catch the disco ball on fire, and for the sirens to continue blasting.

WARNING! WARNING! PREPARE FOR IMPACT! SHIP IS UNABLE TO PROCEED IN FLYING CAPABILITIES! WARNING! WARNING!

"I guess I should've practiced with this more..." Calvin said.

"GET HIM!" Duplicate 2 yelled as he was still fighting with Hobbes.

Rufus and Donald both charged at Calvin, but Calvin got away from them, causing the two to knock into each other.

"Hurry Hobbes!" Calvin yelled as Hobbes finished dealing with Duplicate 2 and the two hopped onto the elevator contraption to get away from them as the ship began engulfing into flames.

"What are we gonna do? We'll never get out of this thing alive! And even if we do, we'll freeze to death!" Hobbes remarked as the two went higher and higher up in the ship to avoid the flames and the other three.

"Relax furball." Calvin said as he threw the ring box out and it turned back into the regular box, and he jumped in quickly, and then quickly reappeared with winter gear and the toboggan.

"You sure did put a lot of thought into this." Hobbes commented as he put on his scarf.

"I'm always prepared for everything." Calvin said proudly as he zipped up his coat and put on his hat.

He turned the box back and put it in his pocket, then they opened an emergency exit, and got on the toboggan, as the ship continued to burn and plunge down.

"Looks like we'll be good once we get near that mountain over there." Calvin said pointing to a snow-covered mountain.

"Sounds like a plan. Now all we gotta do is wait." Hobbes said.

But then, after many struggles, the other three finally got up to where Calvin and Hobbes were.

"You aren't getting away again Calvin!" Duplicate 2 yelled as he, Rufus, and Donald closed on him.

"Forget waiting! Go! Go now!" Calvin yelled.

Hobbes pushed the toboggan and the two flew out of the ship, while the ship crashed into the mountain in flames.

The two landed on the slope of the mountain, and they continued downward.

"Woo-hoo! Home free again!" Calvin yelled as they zoomed down the hill.

"I say there could've been a safer way of getting out of that predicament." Hobbes remarked.

"Oh quit blubbering you sissy, would you rather die?" Calvin retorted.

"No, I'm just saying there were safer ways of fighting those guys off and getting out of that ship than you transmogrifying a rock into a flamethrower that you've long desired to use." Hobbes replied.

"Well, at least I checked another thing off the old-"

Calvin and Hobbes looked back and noticed that an avalanche had occurred, and the snow was coming at them fast.

"Hurry! We're good as dead if that catches up to us!" Hobbes panicked.

"Relax Hobbes, I'm an expert at this kinda thing." Calvin said coolly as he maneuvered the toboggan skillfully as it zoomed downhill, while keeping within a distance of the oncoming snow.

However, the snow soon began creeping closer and closer to the duo.

"Uh, Calvin? You think you can speed it up a little?" Hobbes asked nervously as the snow got closer.

"Don't worry Hobbes, I see a little ramp up ahead that's probably sticking from the snow and ice, so we should be goo-AAHHHHH!"

The snow caught up to Calvin and Hobbes, and it shoved them forward at even faster speeds from what they had been going before, and they flung off the ramp, and went flying.

They screamed as they soon began zooming downward and crashed back into the mountain, being caught in the avalanche, and were bounced around until they were flung off when it reached the bottom of the mountain and they went flying again, crashing into a bank of snow, toboggan included.

Hobbes quickly freed himself from the snow.

"I'll be lucky if I don't use up my nine lives when this is all said and done." Hobbes remarked as he brushed some snow off him.

"You'll be fine furball, now get me out of here would ya?" Calvin muffled as he was still stuck in the snow.

Hobbes quickly pulled Calvin out of the snow bank.

"I'm telling ya Hobbes, whoever thought they should name a snowy country Greenland was clearly sick in the head." Calvin remarked as he began to brush snow off himself.

"He must've enjoyed irony a lot." Hobbes said.

"I'll say! I'll bet there's some country called Whiteland or Snowland and it's nice and sunny there!" Calvin replied.

"I wouldn't be totally shocked." Hobbes replied back.

Then, the two heard something.

Sounded like marching, but it was snowy.

"Oh no... I'd remember that noise anywhere..." Calvin said nervously as he looked ahead.

Hobbes listened closer, and he recognized it as well.

"You don't mean?"

"Unfortunately..." Calvin said sighing as he looked at the incoming army.

"Snow Goons."