"Dad's not going to make it, is he?"

Heather turned and looked at Mark sadly as they stood outside his house. "No, he's not," she admitted with a sigh. "I'll bring over some remedies, if you want, but all that's going to do is help relieve him of the pain."

She watched him process her words for a few seconds. When it was clear that he wasn't going to say anything soon, she turned around, prepared to leave. Suddenly, she felt herself being grabbed by the shoulders. As soon as she faced the person who did, Heather didn't hesitate as she kicked them in the shin and punched them in the stomach at the same time.

Taking a step back, Heather held her hand to where her heart was, which was thumping fiercely against her chest, while she breathed heavily. It took all of her willpower to stop herself from having an episode.

Not here, not now, and certainly, not in front of these people.

After calming herself, Heather looked at Mark, who was still crouching down in pain from the hits she'd given him. Every ounce of her wanted to yell at him for the pain he'd caused her. But the voice at the back of her mind, her father's voice, spoke up and told her that the boy knew nothing about her current unstable mentality. He was just worried for his father's health.

"You know, just because I'm a victor doesn't mean that I'm powerful," Heather told him. "You have to understand that there are certain things that I can't do. I try the best that I can to help you but if this isn't enough for you, I don't know what else is. I understand your situation and I still want to help you in any way I can. I think it's best for you to take some time to clear your head then come speak to me."

This time, she left without any interruptions. At least, not until she was at the outskirts of the Seam. She heard rapid footsteps and looked back to see Gale jogging slightly towards her. He stopped in front of her and she had to look up, reminding her of the bitter fact that he was taller than her even though she was older. Then again, many people were taller than Heather since she was a short person.

¨Is there something wrong, sweetie?" Heather asked him, concern in her furrowed eyebrows.

Gale blushed at the term of endearment since he was not used to it. "No, everything's alright. It's just, I saw what happened. Are you okay?"

Heather's smile faltered a bit at the mention of what occurred earlier. "Yes, I'm fine."

"Are you?" His eyes narrowed at her in suspicion. "Because your reaction when he touched you says otherwise."

"You can take the victor out of the games but you can't take the games out of the victor," Heather said sadly then kissed him on the cheek. "Thank you for your concern, Gale but I'm good."

Since it was Sunday, Heather had to go to Blaze to take Luke from him. But, before that, Heather went to the bakery to get some things and see her dear friend, Miche. The doorbell rang, announcing her arrival when she entered the shop.

She smiled at Miche, who was behind the counter, and walked towards him. She pointed at the things she wanted. While Miche wrapped her orders, they held a conversation.

"So, how's Clover?" she inquired about his girlfriend.

"She's okay," he answered.

"Does she still hate me?" Heather asked bluntly.

"She doesn't hate you,¨ Miche scoffed then struggled to find an appropriate explanation for his girlfriend's hostility towards her. Really, she was amused at the reactions Miche generously gave her. She couldn't care less about what Clover thought of her. Likely, Heather would tell her to get in line along with the other people who held nothing but hatred towards her.

Finally, Miche gave up. "Fine, Clover does dislike you," he admitted. "But at least stopped thinking that you have feelings for me."

"Because she believed you?" Heather already knew the answer but she couldn't not humor Miche on that idea.

He shook his head. "No," Miche denied. "She says that you wouldn't settle for someone like me when you could have prestigious men from the Capitol."

Heather froze.

"Actually, lately I have been hearing those rumours from my mom and the others about you having affairs with people from the Capitol like that Finnick guy," Miche continued. "I know better than to believe them but Heather," he looked her in the eye, "are they true?"

Thankfully, before Heather could start thinking of a way to answer that question, Peeta, Miche's youngest brother, came out from the kitchen.

"Hey, Miche, dad said that he wanted you to-" Peeta stopped at his tracks the moment he spotted Heather. He stared at her, taking a mental picture of her face. Heather has been getting these looks since she was 14 so she was used to it.

She gave him a tight-lipped smile and waved. "Hey, Peeta."

"H-hello He-heather," he stuttered nervously.

Heather giggled at his adorableness then took her order from Miche and paid. "See you when I see you, Miche."

"Bye, Heather," she heard him call out from behind as she turned to leave.

Reaching her last stop, Heather knocked at Blaze's door. Seconds later, she came face to face with a pregnant Cyan.

"Hi," the woman greeted. "Come in."

"Hello," Heather said and entered. "How have you been?"

"I'm okay," Cyan said then paused before adding, "The baby started kicking."

"That's great!" Heather grinned joyously at the news. While Heather didn't necessarily like Cyan, she was all for babies. Especially since she was the one who was going to help birth him, or her

"Thanks. You know, Marlin never left my side because he wanted to feel it too. It wasn't until he fell asleep that he did," Cyan told her.

"Is Luke sleeping too?"

Cyan nodded.

And sure enough, when Heather entered the living room she saw a sleeping Luke and Marlin by each other's side. The scene was too precious on its own that Heather wanted to stay by the doorframe and mesmerized it. Unfortunately, the sun was about to set so Heather had to move fast before it became dark. With no other choice, Heather picked Luke up and said goodbye to Cyan then left.

"Wait!" Cyan called out after her. Heather stopped walking and faced her. She tilted her head in confusion

"I was wondering about tomorrow being… you know," Cyan shied from Heather as she referred to the death anniversary of June and Aeson. "Do you want to spend the day with Blaze and I."

Heather gave out a forced smile and shook her head. "I was… hoping to spend the day alone."

Cyan nodded sympathetically. "Of course, I understand. Everyone handles grief differently.

And there it was, grief.

Sure, everyone handles grief differently, but not Heather. No, she ran away from it. It was easier to deny then face the hurtful truth. She wasn't strong enough to go through the pain.

Heather tried so hard to forget what tomorrow is but Cyan had to bring it up.

As soon as she got home, Heather put Luke on the bed and laid next to him. Heather didn't care about the fact that she didn't eat dinner, and let sleep take over her.

The following day, she woke up late in the morning since Luke got up during the night. After changing his diapers and feeding him, Heather had troubles putting him back to sleep and when he did, her voice was strained from singing lullabies.

She started to stretch all the tensions between muscles and would have continued to do so if it wasn't for the knowledge that Luke was due to wake anytime soon. He would undoubtedly not let her go to the bathroom. Because of her monthly visits to the Capitol, Luke gained separation issues so it was hard for him to part with her. Even if it meant going to the bathroom. But then again, that was the normal behaviour of one-year-olds except Luke's case was extreme.

Later, Heather was halfway through brushing her teeth when she heard a loud scream. Even though Heather knew nothing serious happened and Luke was being clingy, that didn't stop her from bursting into the room with the toothbrush hanging from her mouth. The tears stopped when he saw her and reached her hands towards her.

"Mama," he called out.

Having no other choice, Heather brushed her teeth while balancing Luke on her hip. It didn't help that he kept distracting her as he played with her hair. Not to mention the drooling.

For the rest of the day, Heather looked after her garden. Since she was going to give him a bath anyway, she let him play in the mud and get dirty. These days, Heather was all in a bad mood. Never a break from the dark side of her mind. But not today.

Today, Heather was going to be happy.

Today, Heather was going to relax

Today, Heather was going to be a coward.

During the afternoon, Heather took a bath with Luke. They played with bubbles and had splash wars. They laughed, made noises and screeched together in delight. With Luke snuggled into her, Heather sighed in content. This was a perfect happy bubble and she never wanted to leave.

Unfortunately, not everyone gets what they want.

As the water started to cool down, Heather knew that she had to leave.

While Heather was happy that Luke was growing into a healthy toddler, it didn't mean that she didn't miss the moments where he didn't fight her when it came to putting on his clothes. Seriously, one moment he had his diapers on then the next he'd have them off. At first, Luke's laughter soothed her frustration but after doing a few more times, her irritation overruled his adorables.

Heather gave him a glare that she rarely brought out. That shut him up. Until he started crying.

At least, she could dress him up.

Seeing as she wasn't planning to go out, Heather just wore button-up pajamas. The journey downstairs consisted of Luke trying to squirm from her arms as he wanted to be on the floor.

The rest of the day, Heather spent it reading a book about diseases in the respiratory system and making notes on the topic. Every now and then, she'd put down her book to check on Luke. Sometimes, she'd find him quietly playing on the floor with his toys. Mostly though, he would be crawling towards the stairs which immediately made her put everything down and run after him. At one point, Luke tugged on her blouse, a sign that he wanted to suckle.

However, instead of nursing him, Heather weaned him with sliced oranges. She had only weaned him once, and that was a week ago. She watched him eat them with curiosity and she couldn't hold her laughter at the faces he'd make. He would squint his eyes in surprise, open and close his mouth repeatedly and then go back to eating the orange slice.

"Mama!" Luke held out a slice to her. Beckoning her to take her.

After inwardly squealing at his cuteness, Heather took the slice in his hand with her mouth and devoured it. This made Luke shriek in rejoice as he found the action amusing. He made a mess out the juice he'd squeezed out of some of the previous slices then ate some more slices.

Just like most nights, Haymitch came to have dinner with them. When Luke spotted him, he let out another shriek and crawled as fast as he could to the man. Haymitch, looking so uncomfortable at the display of affection from the toddler, picked Luke from the floor and held him at arms' length.

"Hay, Hay," Luke said with a drool running down his chin.

Knowing that Haymitch was sporting a headache after being drunk most of the day, Heather went and took Luke from him, but not before giving the man a kiss in the cheek.

Under his breath, he grumbled something about people not hearing of personal space. Heather and Luke just giggled at his fussy behaviour.

It might come as a surprise, but whenever Haymitch was over for dinner, he'd be the one to cook. Heather knew that there was a story behind this habit, but never pestered for it. Only a month ago did he tell her about it.

Laying down on the couch, Heather faced the back pillows, refusing to acknowledge her surroundings. Her nose was clogged and dry tears decorated her face. She was sure that her eyes were red too. Heather could hear the noises from the kitchen where Haymitch was cooking.

They had just arrived from the Capitol after the Victor Banquet and it was then that Heather let herself grieve for Feebee and Ash.

Heather knew that she shouldn't have gotten closer to them. She knew of the consequences of doing so. But she also knew that if she could go back in time, she'd do it all over again. Why should she? These two needed someone. Someone to help them. Someone to be with them. Someone to talk to and who listens. Someone who understood. Who's there not just physically, but emotionally as well.

Heather had nothing to regret. The pain may be unbearable but overtime she would learn how to live with it.

When the noise from the kitchen stopped, Heather got up. She took a tissue and blew obnoxiously on it without a care. By the time, she sat at the dining table, Haymitch had already set everything up. There were fried potatoes, salad, and a large bowl of stew with some bread.

Heather stared at the bowl as she had never seen this type of stew before. It had chicken, pieces of carrots and pepper, and the soup around it was yellow. It had a strong spicy aroma emanating from it.

As if reading her mind, Haymitch said. "This was a recipe that my mother created. Of course, she didn't eat it very often as we couldn't afford chicken oftenly but it was the first dish that my mother taught me."

"She taught you how to cook?" Heather asked curiously. "I thought you picked up cooking after you won."

"I had to learn back then" Haymitch explained. "My mother knew that she was going to get sick after working in the mines so she started to teach me when I was 12."

He left the conversation at that. It didn't take long for her mind to come up with the conclusion that he liked to cook because it made him feel closer to his mother. Just like how practicing medicine made her feel connected to her father and older brother.

Heather knew that Haymitch wasn't one for talking, but she really wanted him to open more to her. Looking at him, it was clear that he wanted to do that too, but he didn't know what to do from not having any experiences when it came to sharing his feelings and memories. Except, maybe Chaff.

Then again looking at the positive side, Haymitch had told something about his past. More specifically his family. Something that he had one thrice before, most of them while he was very drunk. A smile made its way to her face after realizing that prospect.

She reached her hand for his and squeezed gently.

"Thank you."

Haymitch smiled, more like attempted to, then squeezed her hand back before turning his attention to the food.

Looking back at it, Haymitch probably told her about his love for cooking to distract her from thinking about Feebee and Ash. More than likely, he wanted to lecture about how she shouldn't get close to the tributes. He must've changed his mind after realizing that she will not listen to him.

However that moment was important because it was then that Heather discovered her true feelings for the older man. Her romantic feelings for him.

In some way, her heart always knew. But it was that moment when Haymitch opened up to her that her mind caught up.

The way she felt when she was in his arms. The way her hand found its way into his whenever they were sitting next to each other. The way they both looked after each other. How he comforted her. How he was the first person she'd think of whenever she needed to talk to someone. How he was with her from the beginning and never left her side.

Heather liked Haymitch, perhaps she might even start to love him over time. But the question was, did he feel the same?

Probably not. After all, she was what? Nineteen years younger than him.

Considering their age gape, Heather would be surprised if he was even interested in her.

Heather watched Haymitch as he moved flawlessly around the kitchen. She wondered if she could ever have a place in his heart which was consumed by the darkness and agony of his poignant past.

She kept her eye trained on him as he worked. Every once in a while, he winced from the pain of his headache.

"Is something wrong?" Haymitch asked, noticing how she has been observing him.

"No," she responded with a hint of a blush. A few seconds laters, Heather turned her attention to Luke.

With his hands gripping the cushions of the couch, the little toddler was standing. His legs were slightly trembling as they weren't used to the act of standing. Heather beamed at him then started to walk towards him. Luke stood on his own before, but when it came to taking his first step things tended to go downhill.

So when he took his stride without the help of the couch, Heather stopped on her tracks shocked. He took another step and his legs shook again as if he was going to fall but he didn't. Instead, he kept slowly walking to her.

Judging by the lack of noises behind her, it seemed that Haymitch too was watching Luke take his first steps. Time became slow motion as Heather looked at Luke. She kneeled down and extended her arms towards him with a bright smile. At that moment, nothing mattered to her. Not the Capitol. Not her feelings for Haymitch. Just Luke calling her out and giggling as he approached her

The second Luke entered Heather's arm, time returned to its original state. Heather jumped at her feet and twirled the boy around. He shrieked with laughter as she kissed him all over his face.

"Ooooh, I'm so proud of you, you little squirt," Heather squealed and hugged him close to her chest. "You did it! You walked for the best for the first time. I can't wait to tell Finn. Oh, your father would have been,"she paused, realizing what she had just said. "so… proud."

That's when it hit her. Aeson and June wouldn't be able to see Luke take his first steps. They wouldn't be able to hear him talk. They wouldn't be able to comfort him if he ever had nightmares. They wouldn't be able to joke and laugh with him. They wouldn't be able to send him off on his first day of school. They wouldn't be able to give him advice when he needed them. Aeson and June would never be there for Luke.

She would, because they were gone. They were gone and there was nothing that could change that. They were gone and it was all her fault.

Heather could feel Luke become confused as one second she was all laughing and cheering but now she was crying as she held them. She kept murmuring apologies to him for being the reason that his parents weren't here with him.

"I'm so sorry, this is all my fault," she told him.

Heather was so lost in her grief that she didn't notice Haymitch taking Luke from her and pulling her to his chest. She cried and wailed into him, letting her feelings, for the first time since forever, take hold of her body. Haymitch rocked her like a baby, stroked her hair, and just, held her.

That was all she needed.

Sorry for the late update. I had problems wording this chapter a little bit, but I hope that you enjoy it.