Where do you go when you want to meet in secret? Underground, of course. But that's far too cliché, don't you think? Besides, Aleister could spy on you far too easily there. No, if you want some privacy in Academy City, you have to get more... creative than that. On the bright side, the hot-air balloon ride hadn't been too expensive, and it was far too easy to rid the balloon of any stray spy tricks Aleister may have planted.

"So, what you're telling me is, you have the ability to bring him back?" The girl asked.

"No, that's not what I'm saying at all. What I can do is duplicate a version of him from another world, where he hasn't died, or at least, not yet." The woman replied.

"Blah, blah, all I hear is that you can. So, once you go and get it done, I'll give you those parts you wanted. With my persuasion ability, it wasn't even a chore to get them."

"If it was so easy, why do you need compensation?"

"Don't get smart with me. I could just as easily take what I want from you."

"Hmph. Consider it done."

The streets of Academy City were filled with people, and why shouldn't they be? After all, it was beautiful weather in broad daylight, on a day off from school no less. Naturally there were the little ones playing around in parks and at arcades. Then you had the groups of friends hanging out, content to waste the day away shopping or singing karaoke. Of course, lastly, there were also the couples. Groups of two who seemed to take no greater joy than in being near each other, complimenting each other and staring at each other, likely annoying all the single folk around.

And speaking of which, there was one such couple that seemed especially annoyed. Or, at least one of them was. The flocks of people scurried away from the middle of the streets, making sure not to allow the blue streaks of electricity to touch them. Although they were used to espers with a less than meager sense of restraint, a few still shouted colorful warnings- or perhaps threats- of Judgment's police presence in Academy City.

Still the girl paid no attention to the shouts, nor to the fact that a shocking amount of electricity poured out from her body as she dashed down the street in pursuit of her prey, like a Lion on the hunt, she could only see the gazelle that was her prey. And like a gazelle, the boy in front of her could only run for dear life, bounding right and left to avoid the lightning strikes that now were clearly aimed at him.

"Stop running, darn it!" The girl cried out as she took a moment to stop and stomp on the ground, causing a much greater charge to gather in the next bolt of lightning that flew towards the poor gazelle.

The gazelle only sighed in response. It's going to be one of those days, huh? I wish this biri-biri bug zapper would leave me alone. The gazelle lamented, refusing to settle on a language. As the bolt neared him, the gazelle once again leaped to its right, completely preventing the bolt from hitting him, although, as he landed, his feet just narrowly escaped a barrage of smaller bolts.

"Urgh! How in the world did this happen?" The girl contemplated as she began her chase anew. "All I wanted was to talk to that idiot about the Daihasei Festival that's coming up! That's it! Not this time! I'm not letting you GET AWAY!" The lioness roared with renewed determination.

"Just my luck." The gazelle lamented again with a gaze upwards. "Well, at least it's a beautiful day. Maybe I'll even escape this crazy chick and go to a nice restaurant... Nah. Knowing my luck, I'd just run into her again and wind up wasting money. Rotten luck."

And so the chase continued, the couple sprinting through the streets of Academy City.

"Ow. That Shirai sure has a fierce kick. Jeez. I guess I should have expected that she'd be upset after that 'fake boyfriend' stunt Misaka pulled." A boy with spiky black hair spoke as he rubbed his head. At the moment, the boy found himself in front of a certain vending machine, that in his extremely short life of a couple months length, he'd already found himself seeing very often. It was probably on his route to school or something, he'd figured.

Either that, or it's some kind of magic vending machine that reappears in front of you on regular intervals. But wait, if that was the case, wouldn't it mean that when I touch it, my Imagine Breaker would go off? So I guess that's out.

Upon giving it another glimpse, the spiky-haired boy recalled that it wasn't just the fact that he saw this vending machine so regularly that made it odd. There was also the fact that whenever he was here, a certain short-haired ZapperBiri was here.

Wait a second... then that means... she'll be here any second, won't she? "How does it go again, 'Fuji Wa' or something like that? Or was it, 'Such Misfortune'? Maybe it was just 'Rotten Luck'." The boy pondered, again causing any firm sense of seriousness to disappear from the atmosphere. Still, on the bright side, he didn't see the girl anywhere, or any girl looking to kill him, for that matter, so he supposed that was a sign of good... aw crap.

"That's it, I better run!" The boy determined, taking off at supersonic speeds from his position next to the vending machine towards his home. If he could just make it there, then the only danger he'd have to face would be his hungry squatter, who he could hopefully appease with the promise of a delicious home cooked meal. Unfortunately, our dear spiky-haired protagonist is an idiot, and thusly, did not think to pay attention to where he was going as he ran, bumping into something hard, knocking it over, and causing himself to trip over a soda can, rolling back down the stairs he had climbed, straight into the back of a bench.

"Ow... the heck is with that? How'd I get knocked back down here?" The boy questioned painfully as he checked himself for any obvious damage.

"Ow... that could only have been..." The hard object surmised as it too, evaluated their condition. The object in question was a plain-looking girl with long black hair.

"Huh? Himegami? Oh, I'm so sorry, I wasn't looking where I was going!" The idiot apologized profusely as he stood up and bowed so quickly his head spun. "Also, can you tell the narrator to stop calling me an idiot?!" The idiot complained with a curled fist raised to the sky.

Himegami walked down the stairs and stared the spiky-haired boy in the face before responding. "It is true, you are not an idiot. However, one might say that is preferable to being called an inconsiderate, philandering, dating sim protagonist, which is what you are."

"Hey! That was rude, Himegami! Do you think you could please have some tact?" The idiot-turned-philanderer questioned with a fair amount of politeness in his indignant tone. "And you, don't think you get to get away with calling me that!"

"By the way, who are you talking to, Kamijo?" Himegami questioned, finally revealing the name of the boy whose identity I tried so hard to hide.

"... No one. So, what are you doing here?" Kamijo asked.

"Well... we had the day off, so I figured I'd enjoy some time outside." Himegami responded, choosing not to disclose that she had just finished an Index-sized portion of hamburgers. Oh... was I not supposed to tell them that, Himegami? My bad, won't do it again.

"Oh. Well again, I'm really sorry that I bumped into you. If you'll excuse, I'm fearing some imminent danger, so I'm just going to rush home." Kamijo turned away from Himegami and towards the stairs with the intention to run off again.

"Wait, I just remembered something." Himegami interrupted.

"What is it Himegami?"

"There was a woman looking for you. I assume another route for you to conquer." Himegami looked away from Kamijo with a disgusted expression.

"Come on, me and you both know that it's nothing like that, I'm sure! So, what did she look like?"

"Why, are you interested?"

"Come on, how am I supposed to make use of information that someone's looking for me if I don't know who they are?"

"Well, they had long dark hair. And... half a shirt."

"Half a shirt?"

"Yes, half a shirt. The top half, of course. She also was wearing a jean."

"You mean a pair of jeans?"

"No, a jean. The other one was cut off. I think I saw they had a sword, too."

"Half a shirt... a jean..." Kamijo pondered, his brain spinning on wheels to try and figure out the identity of the woman Himegami described. "Yep, that has to be Kanzaki. Thanks for letting me know, now I can avoid her."

"Isn't that rude?" Himegami questioned.

"Yeah, but I'd rather not get roped into losing an arm and a leg trying to help her out with some magic thing that they don't even need my help for. Well, see you Himegami." Kamijo said as he took off, not allowing the poor girl the time for a proper farewell.

"Well, at least I got to talk to him." Himegami muttered, her face tainted red.

Meanwhile, Kamijo ran through the streets of Academy City and was nearly home to his dormitory when he acutely noticed that there didn't seem to be anyone around.

"Wait. This is strange. Why is no one here? This can't be goo-

"Kamijo." A stern voice came from behind the spiky-haired boy, causing him to turn in a cold sweat.

"K-Kanzaki. How are you?" Kamijo asked as he stared the saint in the face, wondering what torture she'd put him through today.

"I'm fine Kamijo. And I trust you're doing fine as well." It wasn't a question. Her face, however, softened as she spoke again. "I'm afraid I must request your assistance once again."

"S-sorry Kanzaki, but I'm really busy. I need to go and feed Index, and then I need to get some food for Sphinx, and then I have homework... so, gotta run!" Kamijo turned around and bolted, hoping that the saint would not give chase. And to my surprise, she didn't. Perhaps what she wanted wasn't so urgent after all if that pitiful excuse got Kamijo got out of it.

"Hey, feeding Index is a full-time job. If I didn't do it, everyone in Academy City would be her meal... that is, until she ran into someone like Accelerator, who'd just kill her and eat her, instead."

"Aw-choo! Someone's talking about me. And if I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times, I'm not a freaking cannibal!" A white-haired and red-eyed teenage boy cried out in the middle of the street, despite the fact that he is literally confirmed to be a cannibal.

"It was one time!"

"Well anyway, I'm home now. Well, at least in the elevator." Kamijo breathed a sigh of relief as the elevator door closed. He then pressed the button for his floor and waited as the elevator began... well, elevating.

"Phew, almost there. Just a few more steps." Kamijo said as he exited the elevator. "NO. No, no, no, no, no! Please, tell me I'm having a nightmare." I wish I could, but Toma Kamijo is in fact, awake. And, right in front of his door, stood probably the most terrifying thing possible. No, not Accelerator. Not some magician, or even some other maniacal level 5 esper. No, what stood before him was far worse. A demonic... deranged... boy-hating level four esper. Kuroko Shirai stood in front of Kamijo's dorm door, waving her pink pigtails around with a bored expression on her face.

"Oh no. If she knows where I live now... then me and Index need to go into the witness protection program."

"Huh? That voice. It must be..." Kuroko turned her head towards the elevator. "... The ape-troglodyte!" Seriously, dub, or sub, pick one!

"Oh, hello. What are you doing here?" Kamijo questioned, trying and failing to hide the fear he felt.

"Oh nothing. You see, I saw my beloved Sissy chasing a certain someone through town, so I figured I'd help her corner her prey."

"Uh-uh Shirai, I believe you are mistaken, I haven't seen Zapper, I mean Biri-Biri, I mean Misaka, all day."

"Oh really? I knew you were a troglodyte, but I didn't realize you were a lying ape too!" Kuroko spoke furiously, her eyes filling with red as she entered her demon mode.

"Uh, Shirai, you're a member of Judgment, aren't you? Don't you think you could get in trouble for violently assaulting an innocent person?" Kamijo asked a reasonable question.

Kuroko smirked as she pulled out six spikes from her leg straps. "Oh, that's no issue, so long as they don't find the body."

"ROTTEN LUCK!" Kamijo screamed as he threw himself over the rail onto the street below and started running, well aware that the pigtailed adversary he faced had the ability to teleport.

"Kamijo? What are you doing?" Kanzaki questioned as she saw Kamijo run towards her.

"Running for dear life!" Kamijo exclaimed as he continued running without slowing down even a little bit.

"What could possibly have him so scared?" Kanzaki wondered.

"Get back here you troglodyte!" Kuroko shouted as she teleported through the street after him.

"So that's an Esper, huh? The ability of instantaneous movement from one spot to another. Truly, science is a force to be feared." Kanzaki declared.

"I wonder how Ms. Komoe's doing with Index." The gazelle spoke, having escaped from the lioness that had been pursuing him earlier. "Man, I should hit the arcade or something. It'd be a waste to spend my whole day off running from that bug zapper." The gazelle strode casually out of the alley he was in, heading towards where he knew a good arcade was. It wasn't a very well-known place, so he doubted that anyone would be there to bother him. As he turned the corner he was sent sprawling backwards on the sidewalk.

"Ugh. I thought there weren't any trains in Academy City. Least of all in the streets."

"Please, you have to help me! I'm being chased by a psychotic, hormonal, teenaged girl!" The train in question spoke. I'll skip the beating around the bush, it was Kamijo who had bumped into our poor gazelle.

"Dude, I know what that's like. I'll try and help you as best I can..." The gazelle looked away from the ground towards the person standing above him as he got up.

"Wait a second..."

"You're...

"You're...

"You look just like me!" Both of the boys exclaimed as they pointed at each other.

"Black spiky hair..."

"The same color eyes..." The boys observed each other closely, but encountered difficulty finding even the slightest difference between them.

"Tell me," The gazelle started, "What's your name?"

"What's yours?" Kamijo replied.

"Same time?"

"Yeah."

"3, 2, 1- My name is Toma Kamijo." Both boys said at once.

"No way..." Our resident gazelle's mouth hung open in disbelief.

"I'm not going to lie. I bet this is some kind of trick by some magician or something." Kamijo concluded.

"You're right, I bet you're some kind of illusion created by an esper."

"Well...

"Then I'll...

"Destroy that illusion of yours!" Both of the Toma Kamijos reached out to each other, grabbing each other's shirt.

"Nothing happened." Kamijo commented.

"I guess that means your appearance isn't the work of anything supernatural."

"Yeah, after all, if you were some magic clone or something, the Imagine Breaker-

"Would've destroyed you. But that doesn't mean you're not just a regular clone. I've heard rumors that the scientists here in Academy City aren't beyond that, morally speaking. Or maybe you're just a creep who made themself look like me."

"My thoughts exactly."

"There you are! Don't move, you idiot!" The familiar voice of the Ace of Tokiwadai rang through the air from behind the gazelle's back.

The gazelle made no move towards his predator, instead electing to speak to Kamijo. "When I said I knew what it was like being chased by a hormonal teenaged girl, this is what I meant. For some reason, despite the fact that she's way stronger than poor old me, she keeps challenging me to a fight."

"Sounds like Misaka."

"Misaka? Oh, she did say that was her name. So, you know her too?"

"Yeah, she's constantly bothering me, and honestly, I don't even know why."

"There you are troglodyte!" The enraged shout of Kuroko Shirai came from behind Kamijo.

"Any idea who the pigtailed Judgment officer behind you is?" The gazelle questioned.

"To put it simply, she's not as strong as Misaka, but she's a lot more murderous."

"I see. In that case, before we try and figure out what's going on here, shall we?"

"We most definitely shall."

"RUN!" Both boys took off at the exact same time, as if they'd rehearsed it before, running towards the opposite side of the street. Somehow, both Kuroko and Misaka failed to notice each other, or the fact that they were chasing two identical backs, and continued their hunt.

"We're going to have to work together." The gazelle determined.

"Yeah, so how about this? On my signal, we crisscross, and hopefully throw them off."

"Wait, I've got a better idea. Just up ahead, there's an old sewer pipe we can go down. It's out of date and discontinued, so you don't have to worry about any old sewage being in there."

"Alright, sounds good to me."

"But I'd rather keep it a secret from them, so if you'll excuse me, I'm going to give us a little cover."

"How are you going to do that?" Kamijo questioned.

"Just watch. HEY, Bug Zapper!"

"What are you doing? You're going to get us killed!"

"Why don't you use that lightning you're so proud of?!"

"What'd you say?!"

"Wait, Sissy?" Kuroko exclaimed, shocked by her realization. "Oh, I've been right next to Sissy this whole time, and yet I was too focused on that troglodyte to notice! Please, forgive me Sissy! Accept my love as repentance!"

"KUROKO!" The already blue sky flashed blue with lightning as a reaching Kuroko was struck with less-than divine punishment from above.

"Phew. Now, where'd that idiot run off to? Huh? I don't see him anywhere."

"That didn't quite work out the way I expected, but still, I think we're safe now." The gazelle said as he closed up the manhole above him and climbed down the ladder into the passageway beneath him.

"Thanks a lot. Even if you're a fake me, you can't be that bad a guy if you helped me get away from those girls. Thanks a lot."

"Heh, it's nothing. I just couldn't leave you to that crazy pigtailed girl. Besides, I was in trouble too. But hey! You're the fake, not me!"

"No, you at- hahaha!"

"Hahaha! I guess there's no need to worry about that right now. For now, let's try and get home. Where do you live?"

"The dorms for a Certain High School." Kamijo informed.

"Me too. So I guess we're headed to the same place. Well, let's keep going. It can be confusing down here, and with my luck, if we don't get moving now, we'll be here till midnight."

"Sounds like my rotten luck, alright."

The two Kamijos began walking, talking to each other about different things.

"Wait, that's my apartment number." The gazelle replied in shock when Kamijo told him his dorm room number.

"What? No, it's mine, see? I have the key right here." Kamijo brandished his key, quickly shoving it back in his pocket to prevent him from dropping it.

"Wait, that key. That's the same as mine." The gazelle commented, pulling the same exact key out of his pocket and showing it for Kamijo to see before putting it back in his pocket.

"So then, you're either one of those identity thieves-

"Or you're really me." The gazelle finished.

"Man, this is crazy. How could there be another me?" Kamijo questioned.

"I have a question for you then, if you're really me. What's the name of my parents? This one should be easy."

"Our mom and dad? It's... Toya and Shina Kamijo, right?"

"Yeah, but why do you sound so unsure?"

"Can I tell you something? If I do, you have to keep it secret."

"Yeah, I'll keep it a secret." The gazelle vowed.

"Alright... the truth is, a couple months back... I... lost my memory. I still remembered how to speak, and do high school math and all that stuff, but I couldn't remember anyone."

"Not even our parents or Otohime?" The gazelle questioned.

"No. I've met them since I lost my memory, but when I first woke up in the hospital, I didn't remember them at all."

"Wait up a second. Hospital? What happened to you? No, no, first off; when did this happen?"

"It happened at... the end of July I think."

"The end of July... it's the end of July right now, isn't it? July 24th."

"Huh? No, it's the beginning of September now. Sorry, I don't know the exact date, life's been a bit too hectic for that."

"September huh? That can't be right, let me check my phone." The gazelle pulled its phone out of its pocket and checked its screen for the date and time.

"Wait, seriously? How did this happen? The last thing I remember, it was July 24th and I... wait a second. The last thing that happened that I can remember, I was fighting that lady with the sword. The one chasing Index."

"Wait a minute." Kamijo interrupted. "You know about Index?"

The gazelle sighed. "Look, just for a moment, let's establish that we are both the same person, Toma Kamijo. Yes, I know Index. Now, like I was saying, the last thing I remember is, blacking out on the street in front of that sword lady. Wait, was I asleep this whole time? For over a month?!"

"You know. I'm starting to think magic has to be involved in this."

"I wish I could deny that, but now that I know magic is real, and I've seen what it can do, I have to admit you're probably right. But we've already determined that neither of us are illusions or clones made by magic, so what could it be?" The gazelle questioned.

"Hmm... wait, didn't you say that you thought it was July?"

"Yeah."

"Then maybe... you've been sent here from a different time."

"A different time? Now that I think about, that would make sense. I've been sent forward in time, so that's why there's another me here. You must be the me from this time." The gazelle realized.

"If I'm right."

"But if that's the case, then the real question is... how? And why?"

"Hey wait, is that the exit?" Kamijo questioned, pointing to the manhole that was above the two of them.

"Yep, that's it." The 'past' Kamijo confirmed.

"Okay, then let's go." Present Kamijo took a step onto the ladder and began climbing up it.

"Wait a moment." The gazelle spoke seriously.

"What is it?"

"Before we go up there, let's make this clear. Until we know more about how and why there's two of us, let's not let anyone else know."

"You're right, that's for the best. But there's one snag with that."

"What is it?"

"I have a roommate right now. You know her, it's Index." Kamijo explained.

"Wait, what? That nun's living with you now?"

"Yeah. Look, it's a long story, and I only know the last half."

"Well, I can at least tell you the first... I don't know, eighth or something." The gazelle shrugged as the two of them began climbing up the ladder.

"So what are we going to do?" Kamijo questioned.

"Easy, we just hide me."

"It won't be that easy. Index tends to be waiting right behind the door whenever I get home."

"Oh really? Heh."

"What are you chuckling about?" Kamijo asked as the two boys got above ground.

"Nothing. I just pictured Index saying 'welcome home!' like a daughter or something."

"A daughter?"

"Yeah. I didn't know her long, but she seemed like she'd be a pain to take care of, just like a daughter."

"Well, you're partway right. Unfortunately, she doesn't say welcome home to me, but the food that I'll inevitably cook for her. Not to mention, she's constantly biting me."

"Wait, she does that often?" The gazelle questioned in disbelief.

"Yep."

"Man, that's awful. I felt those jaws once, and I never want to feel pain like that again. I'd say it was even worse than bleeding out fighting that crazy sword chick."

"I've been meaning to ask, but by 'sword lady', do you mean Kanzaki?"

"Kanzaki, huh? Yes, I think I remember her saying that was her name. It's hard to remember, on account of it happening right before I was beaten into a state of unconsciousness. Oh, we're only a couple blocks away now."

"Well, I didn't know that Kanzaki almost killed me. She acts pretty casual for all that."

"Wait. Are you telling me you, I mean I, I mean, we? Let's just say we- actually made friends with that lady? Did we make friends with the red-haired magician too?"

"You mean Stiyl? I mean, I wouldn't say we're friends, but he seems to at least trust me. Quite frankly, the guy's a jerk."

"Heh, heh."

"What's so funny?"

"It's just... I remember fighting for my life against that guy and his Inno-something fire monster, so hearing myself talk so casually about him is pretty strange. Then again, this whole situation is just strange." The past Kamijo explained as they entered the dormitory elevator.

"Anyways, about Index?"

"Right, well... I guess I could just hide until she goes to sleep, and then you could let me in."

"But where would you sleep?"

"It's fine. It's still really warm out, so I could just take a spare futon and sleep on the balcony."

"Wait, you, I mean we, have a spare futon?"

"Yeah. It's in my closet."

"Why didn't I know this?! I wouldn't have had to sleep in the stinking bathtub!"

"Why were you sleeping in the bathtub?"

"Because, Index took the bed."

"Okay, so? The bed's big enough for two, especially with Index's size."

"Yeah, but I don't trust myself to sleep next to her. Wait, what's with that look on my- I mean your- face?" Kamijo asked, seeing the disgusted look on his past self's face as they backed away from him.

"You're telling me that in the future, not only do I lose my memory, but I also become, a *shudder* lol-

"Don't say it!" Kamijo interrupted, not wanting to hear that he was like Accelerator.

"Aw-choo! This crud again? Also, I am not-

"But it's true! Otherwise-

"Hey! You're the only one who has my back! Everyone else always assumes everything's my fault, you can't start joining them now!" Kamijo protested.

"I- you're right. I'll have your back, and you can have mine. We have to trust each other, even if we're both suspicious of each other, on the account of us possibly being fakes of each other."

"A few words too many." Kamijo remarked, causing both of the Kamijos to laugh. *Ding*

"Guess we're at our floor." The gazelle noted as the elevator door began to open.

"Wait... I just remembered. Kuroko, that crazy, pigtailed girl, she knows where I live now."

"You don't think that they're crazy enough to-

"They are! Get behind me!" Just then, the door opened, revealing Mikoto Misaka and Kuroko Shirai standing right outside two poor Toma Kamijos' dorm room. As the sun set in the background, the sound of the door opening drew the girls' attention towards the two Kamijos.

"There you are!"

"Idiot!"

"Troglodyte!"

To be continued...

So what do you think? Is the story absolute trash, or do you think it deserves a second chapter? If someone actually wants me to continue this, I might make another chapter. If not, it's a good story starter for someone else.