Harry Potter and the Unwanted Marriage Contract

HP AU ? HP and DG.

A Marriage contract story with a difference.

AN: Not a happy story. Some bad language. Harry makes jokes about killing himself.

AN: The sequel to my crackfic Harry Potter and the Method of Double-tap. Go read that first.

This story takes place after Harry Potter and the Goblet of fire; and if you don't read the prequel, nothing will make less sense… Or more sense. Or something. This is fanfic.

AN: If you want a crack version of this, it's available too. This version's all angsty. Harry's a canonically moody little bugger, and I felt like writing it this way.

If you weren't reading… Harry's killed Peter Pettigrew, somewhat vanquished Voldemort in the graveyard with a lot of help from Cedric Diggory, killed the fake Mad-Eye moody, been freed forever from Dursleys by a freed Sirius Black, handed back the gun Sirius gave him, then avoided death by accidental arranged marriage to Delphini Riddle, and gone home to Grimmauld place.

Harry's betrothal contract with Delphini Riddle showed up as an extra face on the magical family tree with a line linking Delphini Riddle to Harry. There were of course lines up the family tree showing her parentage. Tom Riddle finally made into a real pure-blood family tree. Briefly.

Thanks to JK Rowling and her publishers etc.. for allowing fanfic.

Grimmauld place, kitchen.

Sirius Black sits down at the kitchen table and admires his leather jacket on the back of the kitchen door.

Harry heads off upstairs.

"Where are you going Harry?" asked Sirius, chasing Harry.

"Just going to check the family tree. Just to be sure." said Harry.

"Fine, my paranoid godson." said Sirius, who liked chasing things.

Harry enters the room with the family tree and heads for his own section.

Harry and Sirius bend down and look at Harry's face on the family tree that covers the walls of the whole room. "Fuck… there's still a girl there linked to my name" said Harry. "I'm still in a marriage contract!"

"Lumos" said Sirius, squatting slowly.

"I still can hardly see.. still a witch D something"

"Lumos" repeated Sirius.

"Who the hell is Daphne Greengrass?" asked Harry. 'And why am I in a marriage contract with her.' he thought

Sirius snorted "The Greengrasses are in the sacred twenty eight and she's born in 1980, like you. She's at Hogwarts with you" said Sirius certainly.

"How do you know all that?" said Harry, noting the year of birth on Daphne's name-rectangle-thingy.

"Harry, there are only twenty eight names in the sacred twenty eight. It's easy." said Sirius.

"Sirius, I solemnly swear, I've never heard of her" said Harry.

Sirius snorted. "Well, she's not a bastard, or a halfblood" said Sirius, tracking upwards. "Her mother's an Abbot."

Silence.
"Sirius, can I have the gun back, so I can shoot myself?" asked Harry.

"Harry," Sirius squinted at the painting "She looks alright" he said.

"This is not happening" said Harry, shaking his head.

"Harry, you probably don't have to marry her" said Sirius.

"What?"

"We'll find the Potter family rules, I'll un-adopt you, you'll be fine"

"Sirius, that sounds like a load of bull"

"I Was trying to make you feel better" said Sirius.

"So I go from having Voldemort try to kill me, to having to marry some girl I've never met." cried Harry.

"Harry, you've met her, you might not have ever noticed her, or talked to her, but she was at the same sorting as you" said Sirius.

"Well she's not in Griffindor"

"Well of course not"

"What do you mean?"

"The hats tell you the house people were in at Hogwarts" said Sirius.

"But her hat is silver"

"Yeah, well, that explains why you haven't talked to her." said Sirius.

"Huh"

"Harry, look at most of the Blacks. What colour are their hats"

"Umm…. Silver"

"Slytherin" said Sirius.

"I'm dead. A witch from Slytherin, forced to marry me… I'm a dead man" moaned Harry.

"No Harry, you'll just be dead on the inside" said Sirius, cheerfully. "Like all your Black forebears"

...

"Harry, you can talk to snakes, right" asked Sirius

"Yeah"

"Problem solved. Use snake speech on her" said Sirius.

"Asshole" said Harry sulkily.

...

"We need to deal with this, write her family a letter"

"I'm fourteen" cried Harry.

"And you're an adult at seventeen, so you only have three years to get to know her."

-==0==-

The kitchen, that afternoon

"Come on Harry, we're going shopping you need clothes that fit."

"You're going to buy me clothes?"

"Well, you're too small for mine, and I'm wearing them"

"Sirius, thanks"

"Don't thank me, this is going to take ages"

-==0==-

Back at Grimmauld place, later.

"Sirius, why is your house filthy and full of magical pests"

"Because my mother died and left it for ten years"

"I'm sorry"

"Don't be, she was an horrible woman, who supported Voldemort"

"I'm sorry it's disgusting." explained Harry.

"Well, we could hire some cleaners, I suppose" said Sirius.

"Sirius, I'm really upset about the marriage contract stuff"

"It is awful, but we're Blacks. Show some stiff upper lip."

"I'm fourteen and forced to marry Sirius, I'm very sad" said Harry.

"And I know about the contracts the Black family uses Harry, I'll do all I can to help you."

-==0==-

The Leaky Cauldron, the back room.

Sirius and Harry walk in, the door is marked "Private function"

There's a family sitting, waiting.

Harry sees a Blonde mother, a blonde daughter… That must be Daphne. She has blue eyes, and an angry face.

"Lord Black, Mister Potter" says the father, standing up. He's dark haired, like the younger daughter, who seems excited.

"Lord Greengrass" says Sirius, nodding.

"My wife Salome" she nods.

"My daughter Daphne," Daphne stares at Harry angrily. 'This is not going well' thought Harry.

"My youngest, Astoria." Astoria seems highly amused and winks.

"I think everyone knows Me, and Harry's more famous than I am" said Sirius.

Lady Greengrass frowns.

Harry tries to do the thing they rehearsed "Lord Greengrass, Lady Greengrass, Daphne, Astoria" he nods to them all.

"Please, call me Gary" says Lord Greengrass.

Astoria titters.

Salome Greengrass elbows her husband "Cyrus , call me Cyrus" says Cyrus.

Harry can't help it, and he snorts. Salome and Daphne and Astoria all look like they've heard Cyrus make a joke like this before, and have ceased to find it funny.

Cyrus waves them down and they sit, opposite the Greengrasses.

"So, our children are caught in a dangling marriage contract" said Cyrus.

"Our second this month" said Sirius.

Astoria snorts. Cyrus looks peeved. Daphne briefly stops glaring long enough to look surprised, then goes back to glaring.

"We heard about that Riddle Girl. Who are they anyway?" asked Cyrus.

Harry coughs "Voldemort's bastard daughter" he says, as plainly as he can.

Salome speaks up "Well, I can see that would have been unacceptable" she says, in a dignified voice.

Daphne looks like she's trying to skin Harry with eye power alone. Great.

Sirius speaks up "So at present, Harry is my Heir, to Black, and Potter as well."

Cyrus blinks. "Both?"

"Well, I don't have a wife or children" said Sirius "But that could change"

Daphne gives Sirius a look that makes Harry think she thinks 'not bloody likely.'

He snorts. Daphne glares at him.

Sirius starts again "Now Harry hasn't met Daphne, even though they're both at Hogwarts."

Daphne mouths 'griffindork' silently.

Harry tries to smile but he's feeling terrified.

"So, I assume that from how they're looking at each other, neither is very happy with the contract" said Sirius.

"Daphne is uh.. " said Cyrus

"Ropeable" said Daphne clearly, in an upper class accent.

Salome smiles thinly, as this is clearly more appropriate language than has been used before.

"Well Harry, did say.. that he thought he was a dead man" said Sirius.

"I'm dead. A witch from Slytherin, forced to marry me… I'm a dead man" said Harry, quoting.

Daphne's face brightened up at this admission. Harry noticed that she was actually pretty, when not trying to glare his skin off.

"So, we have a quite standard, unwanted contract. Any exit clauses you can find?" asked Sirius.

"Our lawyers have found it, and it is an old Black contract" said Salome, ominously.

"Oh dear" said Sirius.

"You are familiar with these contracts?" asked Cyrus.

"They have turned up in family discussions" said Sirius and sighed.

"Is there any way out of it?" asked Harry. Daphne looked very pleased at the question.

"Well, if either of them die, the contract goes dangling again, and as you have two daughters..." said Sirius.

Astoria, who'd been looking fairly amused, suddenly looked horrified.

"And if Harry dies?"

"My next male heir, probably. The age range allowed in Black contracts is thirty years, with marriage at seventeen"

Both the Greengrass girls looked at Sirius murderously.

"And if either party murders the other, the contract will probably kill the other." said Sirius.

Daphne Greengrass looked very angry. "Father!" she spat.

"Dear, our lawyer is in hospital from trying to read the contract" said Cyrus gently.

"Oh yes, can't be read by uninterested parties." said Sirius offhandedly.

"You seem well informed about these contracts" said Salome.

"Well, my cousin Bellatrix had one with Rudolphus LeStrange." said Sirius.

"Bellatrix LeStrange was contracted onto ..." said Daphne Greengrass, looking disgusted.

"Yeah, Bella didn't take well to the contract, and then, well, she went mad." said Sirius

"What?" cried Cyrus.

"If they don't both say I do, and mean it, they get cursed, a compliance curse" said Sirius.

"You Beasts put this contract onto my poor Daphne!" cried Salome.

Harry was horrified. "I'm so sorry" he said.

"So If I don't say I do and love that twit, I'm going to get my mind destroyed!" exclaimed Daphne.

"There is a loophole" said Sirius.

"What, How?" asked Cyrus sharply.

"They have to say I do, and mean it. But they can change the vows they take, by mutual agreement."

"That's a hell of a loophole" said Cyrus.

"How much can you change the vows?" asked Daphne.

"Lets take a look" said Sirius.

Cyrus slid a very large, bulging envelope over to Sirius and he pulled out a hefty bundle of very old parchment.

"This is old" said Sirius.

"Problem?" asked Salome.

"Older than I've seen before…. Oh that's not good. Oh that's awkward….. Oh bugger."

Sirius looked up "This contract has some fixed vows."

"What?" asked Cyrus

"Fidelity Loyalty and Domesticity" said Sirius.

"They have to live together, can't fool around and can't make oaths to others." Sirius explained

"Oaths?" asked Salome.

"Yeah, so they won't be saying "Basil, I love you and swear I'll marry you when Potter dies", because that would be breaking a vow, and that's very painful, or fatal." said Sirius.

"You know this contract?"

"I read fast" said Sirius "And summarise well, It got me EE's at Hogwarts."

Harry looks at his godfather and feels a surge of dislike. What a jammy prat.

"Anything else?" asked Cyrus, clearly equally irritated with his dogfather.

"O dear, It's got old-timey pre-marriage clauses." said Sirius, sounding disappointed.

"Pre-marriage?" asked Salome.

"Yeah, uh, fidelity, uh, " Sirius stopped reading. "Look, we can change some of this contract by mutual agreement."

"We can?" said Cyrus

"We can't stop it from being a contract, and we can't make it not a marriage contract, but we can take out the more awful clauses." said Sirius.

"We can?" asked Daphne hopefully.

"We can't get rid of the penalty clauses." said Sirius.

"Crap" said Daphne.

"What she said" said Harry.

"Look, loyalty" said Salome brightly. Daphne looked incredulously at her mother.

"We can take out the er, pre-marriage fidelity clause, and the loyalty clause. We can't take out some of the courting clauses." said Sirius.

"Courting clauses" said Daphne, as if she'd just said "Terminal cancer"

"They have to date a set number of times per month, which is … two , and dine together weekly" said Sirius.

Daphne looked at Harry and mouthed what Harry was pretty sure was 'just kill me.'

"And there its… the gala clause." said Sirius despondently.

"What?" asked Salome.

"At Galas, balls they must be on each others dance cards" said Sirius.

"That doesn't sound so awful" said Salome.

"And if they dance with anyone else, they die." said Sirius. "This is the contract grandmother used to scare us kids with."

"You're joking" said Daphne.

"No, I'm always Sirius" said Sirius. "It's a stinker of a clause."

Silence for a while. Even Astoria's looking depressed.

"So hypothetically, If you and Harry were both to die unexpectedly, what would happen ?" asked Daphne.

"Harry's best friend in the entire world, Mad Eye Moody would be very interested."

"Urk" said Daphne.

Harry spoke up "What counts as dining together?" he asked.

Sirius flipped pages "The same room at the same time" he said.

Harry laughed then said "Miss Greengrass, may I have the honour of dining with you at Hogwarts in the great hall, I'll be at the Griffindor table, you'll be at Slytherin"

Daphne looked amused "That sounds delightful. Why let us dine there up to three times a day."

Salome laughed. She had a very pretty laugh, though Harry.

"So what counts as a date?" asked Harry.

Sirius flipped backward and forwards "Er, that's harder, they have to be in close proximity, interact and be seen."

"Hmm. Potions?" said Harry.

"No way. You're hopeless, and I'm only getting A's"

"Walks to the black lake?" asked Harry

"Ugh."

"Well, Hogsmeade's right out" said Harry.

"Social death" said Daphne and they nodded in unison.

"Er, if you skip the courting clause… it's … you'll get sick and have to touch." said Sirius.

"Potions?" asked Harry again.

"How close do we have to be?"

"Arms length" said Sirius.

"What if we went for a run in the morning" asked Harry.

"Social suicide." said Daphne

"What if we were in a larger group… a running club" said Harry.

"That could work" said Sirius, reading frantically, after fifteen minutes, he sighed "That will work."

"I'm not that keen on running" said Daphne.

"Well, something" said Harry.

"Choir?" asked Daphne.

"Can't sing." said Harry.

"Gobstones?" said Daphne.

"Okay, that's doable" said Harry.

"Can you two get that close at Gobstones club without social death?" asked Astoria.

"Er, that's a point" said Daphne "I'm second seed this year".

"You'd best get some muggle running shoes and clothes" said Harry.

"Ugh!" said Daphne.

"Um Daphne, do you like to dance?" asked Harry.

"Not particularly..." she replied.

"Well, we jut don't dance" said Harry. "Gala clause averted."

"But if I do?" asked Daphne.

"Lets burn the bridge when we come to it" said Sirius.

"This is important. My daughter could Die!" said Cyrus.

"Look they just have to … the old lost bet gambit" said Sirius smiling to himself.

"The what?" asked Salome.

"You claim that as part of some stupid bet, you lost a bet and end up having to dance with someone you detest, in this case, Daphne with Harry."

"Nobody would believe it" said Daphne.

"Carry parchment with the forfeit written out on it." said Sirius.

"No-one would believe that" said Astoria.

"My cousin used it to dance with her muggle-born boyfriend for years. Till she eloped" said Sirius, and blinked at them all.

"You need to do some groundwork, make sure everyone knows they dislike each other" said Sirius.

Daphne snorted "That's trivial"

"A teensy bit dangerous, we need to strike the loyalty and fidelity pre-marriage clauses before its safe to say for example 'I detest Harry potter and dancing with him would be the worst forfeit ever.'" said Sirius.

"What ever would anyone use as lost bets?" said Salome.

"Quidditch matches?" asked Harry.

"Honestly, if you're playing, and there aren't Dementors, you're going to win" said Daphne.

"Pleased you appreciate me" said Harry, nodding.

"Children, be nice, we need to vary the contract before you can safely be obnoxious to each other" said Salome.

"Well at least I don't have to kiss him" said Daphne.

Sirius nodded "That would only be in a really old contract."

"Isn't this one really old?" said Cyrus nervously.

Sirius flicked through it "Here we go… courting clauses… no no no No specific kissing clause."

"Whew" said Astoria.

Daphne snorted.

"Daphne, have I told you how much I love you and want you to be healthy" said Astoria.

Daphne rolled her eyes. Harry laughed.

Sirius was running his finger down the pages and he stopped and snorted. "Oh, that's awkward."

"Awkward"

"There's a, er intimacy clause in the courting clauses." said Sirius glumly.

"Not..." Cyrus trailed off.

"No.. but they've got to swap spit. They've got to hold one another... and laugh." said Sirius.

"Laugh?" said a horrified Salome.

"They have to make each other laugh" explained Sirius.

"Well I can just look at the boy who dorked. I'll laugh" said Daphne.

Harry sighed.

"What's the penalty on that?" asked Cyrus.

"Oh… um , oh that's very creative.. I'd be proud of that myself." said Sirius.

"What?" asked Salome.

"If Harry doesn't make Daphne laugh, she won't taste sweet, and vice versa" said Sirius.

Cyrus snorted "They are the sweetness of each other lives." The adults chortled.

"Can you lot stop laughing at my imminent loss of a taste bud" said Harry angrily.

Daphne looked apoplectic "No sweets!"

"The courting clauses don't kick in till you're fifteen" said Sirius.

"Which of us?" asked Harry.

"Either" said Sirius, not looking up from the parchment.

"July 31" said Harry.

"May 12" said Daphne.

"Thanks Daphne, I'm sure" said Harry.

"What about love potions" asked Astoria, rubbing her hands together.

"What?" asked Sirius

"Well, they can take a love potion, do disgusting things, and not hate themselves, and do it again two weeks later." said Astoria.

"A mild love potion" said Salome.

"Amortentia would be right out" said Cyrus.

"Well, really, would it?" asked Sirius.

"What's Amortentia?" asked Harry.

"The most powerful love potion there is" said Cyrus.

"Why the hell would we want to use that?" asked Daphne.

"Because the required dose would be tiny" said Sirius, "And you'd easily comply with all the courting clauses"

"They'd be all over each other. I'm not having that" said Salome.

"Not with a tiny dose." said Sirius thoughtfully.

Daphne and Harry looked thankful.

Sirius sighed "Okay a tiny dose. What do you two think?" he asked.

Harry looked at Daphne, who shrugged "There's no way I'm kissing him voluntarily." she said.

"Oh shit!" said Sirius "Quick, get a quill and change the pre-marriage clauses, taking out the fidelity clause" he cried.

"Why" asked Cyrus.

"Because Daphne just swore an oath to not kiss Harry voluntarily." said Sirius.

"Oh… shit, a quill" cried Cyrus.

The parents found the section, and crossed out the fidelity clause and Sirius and Cyrus initialled it.

"Harry, hold Daphne's hand for about twenty minutes" said Sirius.

"Why?"

"Because otherwise she'll be sick till you do, she violated the now removed fidelity pre-marriage clause"

"Now that they're holding hands, we can get rid of the pre-marriage loyalty clause too" said Sirius.

Sirius found that section, and crossed out the fidelity clause and Sirius and Cyrus initialled it.

"Okay kids you can be obnoxious to each other" said Salome.

"Later" said Daphne.

"I'm never going to like treacle tart ever again" moaned Harry.

Daphne looked dismissive. "Hey Potter, what do you call a man with no brain?" asked Daphne.

"I dunno Daphne, what do you call a man with no brain?" asked Harry.

"Your godfather." she said.

Harry chuckled. Maybe treacle tart wasn't going off the menu.

Harry looked at her face and thought, one day, I''ll be married to her. It made a tiny part of his heart warmer, in a cold sort of way.

"So the funny thing about Amortentia, is it smells different to everyone" said Cyrus.

Daphne,Astoria and Harry were all surprised.

"Although it's a love potion, if you smell it, you smell your actual love."

"What?" said Harry.

"So if I smell it, I smell you mother's perfume" said Cyrus. Salome held Cyrus's hand.

Astoria mimed vomiting.

Harry chuckled.

"Well, now we can let the children discuss things more freely" said Cyrus.

"He's a moronic half blood" said Daphne. "My life is ruined"

"I'd never met her" said Harry "But at least I know she hates me, and my life ends on my seventeenth birthday"

"My Fifteenth" said Daphne. "After that I have to kiss you, you reject"

Cyrus took a deep breath "Well, this is, not great." he said, sounding very depressed.

Sirius nodded "My cousin screamed all the way to altar. Of course, then she screamed afterwards, but that was because she went insane. Not that she was ever all there to start with..." said Sirius.

Harry and Daphne swallowed and looked pale.

"We need to change the vows" said Harry.

The removable vows were removed.

"So that's what we have to say" said Daphne, reading the page.

"Not for three years" said Harry.

"I hate you" said Daphne.

"I'm sorry this happened" said Harry. "My life's been rubbish, but I'm sorry you're dragged into it"

Daphne looked surprised "You really are sorry, aren't you?" she asked.

"Well of course" said Harry.

Sirius patted Harry on the back "Well said Harry"

"So Potter, why do you only wear school robes, even on weekends?" asked Daphne.

"Harry lived with his Muggle aunt and uncle until I was freed. They didn't like him, and gave him nothing but hand-me-down clothes. So he hasn't been spoiled" said Sirius

Daphne looked from Sirius to Harry and back "But Dumbledore..."

"Isn't exactly our favourite person" said Harry darkly.

-==0==-

Harry has a perfectly nice time on the Hogwarts express.

Hermione and Ron are pleased to see him, he catches up with Seamus and Dean, and enjoys some sweets and exploding snap with his best friends.

Eventually Hermione descends into a book and Ron and Harry play some more snap.

Harry reaches into his pocket and finds a piece of cardboard. He takes it out and reads it 'Running club.'

"Oh yeah, I'm thinking of starting a running club at Hogwarts, we'll go for a run first thing" said Harry.

"Seems a bit… early for that" said Ron.

"That seems like a great idea Harry, physical fitness is very important" says Hermione.

"You joining, Hermione?"

"I, um… Okay" she says.

"Cool, I'll put some signs up around school tomorrow" said Harry.

"Harry, are you going to make it an open club?" asked Hermione.

"Well, why not. School unity and all that" said Harry.

Draco Malfoy turns up for his annual on-train bullying attempt.

"You're back, you stinky glory thief" says Draco Malfoy.

"Sorry Draco, yes I am" says Harry, looking back at his card game.

"You can't just ignore me!" says Draco.

"Draco, I had two adults try to kill me last year. A bit of verbal abuse from the Heir to the Malfoy name, really, you're not so bad" says Harry.

Draco doesn't know quite what to think at this statement.

"You'll get yours" says Draco.

"Draco, as you may have heard, I got captured by a dangling Black marriage contract. So my life is already ruined, and there's a special witch who wants me to die of natural causes before her fifteenth birthday. Really, you're going to hex me painfully and call me names. Big deal."

Hermione and Ron look at Harry incredulously.

"Do neither of you read the paper" Harry said.

"I thought you got out of the contract with that Delphini girl" said Hermione.

"She was never a threat. She's a bastard daughter of a halfblood, so Sirius tore up the contract"

Draco Malfoy's mouth opened and shut.

Ron looked up at Draco "I think you broke him, Harry"

"Marriage contracts are a barbaric" said Hermione.

"Yes they are" said Harry. "And involuntary for everyone in my case"

Draco Malfoy left, looking at Harry briefly, with a look of, was that pity?.

-==0==-

Term starts with the surprise announcement that Professor Moody is back for a second year "I wasn't here last year, that was a Death eater polyjuiced as me" says Moody in his introductory speech. By Hogwarts standards, a pretty upbeat start to the year.

Harry is surprised, when after the announcements, a group of students led by Professor Flitwick go up to the platform high table sits on and form three rows.

Harry avoids looking at a certain Slytherin, who is in the back row.

The ones in the front row are holding toads, and some more students are holding musical instruments.

They start to play a boppy tune, and then the group sings. It's a witchey song, about bubbling cauldrons and trouble, and rather catchy, and Harry enjoys it.

Judging by the applause, so does most of the school.

After the singers depart back to their tables, Professor Moody winked at him from the high table.

"Harry, are you really stuck in another marriage contract" asked Hermione, after the first course.

"Yes, mother" said Harry.

"Who is it?" she asked.

"I'm not saying. We don't know each other, don't like each other and we have to get married. We have three years left, then..." said Harry.

"Blimey" said Ron "You have the worst luck Harry"

"There has to be some way out of the contract, maybe I can research it and help" said Hermione.

"Hermione, listen carefully. The contract is cursed , and if you read it, you'd end up in St Mungos."

Hermione looked horrified. "That's awful"

"Not as bad as having to marry someone you don't love" said Ron.

Hermione gave Ron a look that seemed oddly approving. Harry resolved to remember the time when Ron said something Hermione approved of fully. He suspected it might not happen again soon.

Harry took a poster for the running club to Professor McGonagall during her office hours and she enthusiastically approved.

"Harry, this is very good. I will see that this notice gets put on every noticeboard. If you keep this sort of behaviour up, you might be made Prefect next year." she said.

Harry wasn't sure being prefect was compatible with sneaking round having adventures, but maybe this year would be quieter.

-==0==-

The first Thursday saw the running club's first meeting, in the front hall, at eight.

Harry tightened his running shoe's laces and looked out the narrow window at the day. It was typical Scottish weather, and summer was ending. Harry zipped up his windbreaker.

Hermione stood nervously, in a tracksuit and trainers. "I hope I don't get stitch" she said.

After a while, students appeared, some wearing muggle running gear, others in what Harry assumed were wizarding exercise robes.

After his new watch said it was ten past, Harry spoke up "Okay, it's time to start off. We're running down to the lake, round once and back. We'll be going easily, and it's okay for people new to running to go slow."

"Who made you the boss of this club?"

"I started it, but if someone else want to organise it, please, feel free" said Harry, turning back to the group. "Come on. Lets run."

Harry ignored the grumbles and set off slowly down the hill. He tried not to look out for a certain blonde Slytherin. He figured he'd go slowly, end up in the new runners bunch and accidentally run with her.

A group of seventh years blew past Harry laughing. Harry thought they were the Hufflepuff Quidditch beaters maybe.

Someone fell in beside him and jogged along. "Hi Hermione" said Harry, then looked over. It wasn't Hermione. It was Daphne Greengrass, in a neat green tracksuit with silver piping. "Potter" she said.

"Greengrass" he said.

"Did you have to start it on the first week back" she complained.

"We only have till your birthday to make this a routine" he replied.

"Daphne" said Hermione, pulling alongside. Hermione must have been doing some exercise, because she wasn't puffing that badly. Then again, neither was Daphne.

"Granger" said Daphne, like she knew Hermione.

"You know Greengrass?" asked Harry, pushing his luck.

"Runes" said Hermione.

"Arithmancy" said Daphne.

"Some of us take subject that aren't easy O's" said Hermione.

Daphne snorted.

"Did he really" asked Daphne.

"He got the idea from Ron." said Hermione.

"Dunderheads" said Daphne, in a very Snape-like tone.

Hermione laughed.

After getting a quarter of the way around the lake, Harry felt warmed up and was disturbed to hear one of the sixth year boys, who were tailing the sixth year girls, Harry noticed, say "Potter starts the club and can't even run."

Harry thought 'Right, that's enough,' took deeper breaths and started to really run. Like in the bad old days of Harry hunting. He shot past the sixth year groups, noticing that the girls were really um, developed and carried on around the lake. He picked up his pace and started to get hot, so unzipped his windbreaker, and tied it around his waist. Feeling the run, he kept running, and when he got to the path back to Hogwarts, continued for another lap.

He caught up to the slow moving group of learners as they nearly reached the path back to Hogwarts, and though he was getting sweaty and starting to tire out, he kept running up the path.

"Bloody showoff" said someone loudly behind him.

Harry was slowing down to cool down by the time he got to the entrance hall. He stood, panting, hands on bent knees feeling more alive than he had in ages.

Some of the faster runners were hanging around the hall

"Pooped from one lap Potter, you're not much of a runner" said a young man in an open tracksuit; Harry thought he was a Ravenclaw maybe.

"Two laps" he panted.

The Ravenclaw? looked green at this and wandered off.

"Two laps eh?" said one of the, must be seventh years "Think we'll have a group for real runners"

"I'll keep pace with the slow ones" said Harry, panting "Give them help"

"You noble little squirt" said the Seventh year "Pembroke Beedle, no relation, Head boy." Pembroke held out his hand.

Harry stood up straight, and shook Pembroke's hand. "Sorry I'm sweaty" said Harry.

"Good work starting the club. Keep up the good work" said Pembroke and sauntered off.

Harry stayed, tired and sweaty in the entrance hall until the slowest of the students he'd lapped came in.

"Harry!" said Hermione, sweaty in her tracksuit "You did two laps, you showoff"

"I just wanted to run" said Harry.

Daphne Greengrass walked past on the way to the dungeons, sweaty and tired and looked at Harry like she wanted him dead. Because she did.

-==0==-

Professor Moody held Harry back after class.

He spelled the door shut and then asked "Potter, Where's your gun?"

"In storage. I figure with Voldemort contained, I'm a lot safer, and the gun is hard to hide, and if someone found it..." said Harry.

"Yes, that would be a problem. You're going to practice fighting with a magic instead, twice a week. After dinner."

"I have quidditch practice on Tuesdays and Thursdays"

"So Mondays and Wednesdays it is, my office. Eight pm. Sharp"

Harry nodded "Thanks Professor"

"Are you really cursed by a marriage contract Potter?" asked Professor Moody.

"Yes sir."

"Well, who is it?" asked Professor Moody.

"Daphne Greengrass, Slytherin"

"huh, you could do worse" said Professor Moody.

"The first one was Voldemort's daughter!" cried Harry.

"Well, that was pretty unlucky, but you got out, and I caught wee miss Riddle."

"What !"

"Well, lets just say the apple doesn't fall far from the tree" said the Professor.

"So she was evil?"

"Like a miniature Bellatrix LeStrange"

"Er, that's my aunt, and I think it was the marriage contract that drove her mad" said Harry.

"Huh, you didn't arrest her at Hogsmeade like I did for fighting. She was a mean, angry young woman" said Professor Moody.

Harry's testicles tried to retract spontaneously into his body.

"Don't you worry. Every few generations someone gets caught by a dangling contract. They do fine" said Professor Moody.

"She hates me" said Harry.

"So what. You're not going to get lovey hugs and kisses. She'll be on your side, guarding your back." said Professor Moody

"Hardly romantic is it?" said Harry.

"Romance, pish. If you took her out to dinner at a nice restaurant, and chatted you couldn't tell the difference" said Professor Moody

"But feelings" said Harry, angstily.

"You're fourteen. You'll get feelings alright. And then you'll get older, and get over them. At least your beat Voldemort. You only have to worry about the usual suspects now."

"Can I go now?" asked Harry.

"Sure you can, you poor wee boy" laughed Professor Moody.

Telling Professor Moody about the whole Greengrass situation was looking less and less like a good idea.

-==0==-

Harry took the train back to London at Christmas.

Hermione sat opposite him, wearing a woolly jumper with a snowflake a pattern and reading.

Ron had found the lure of the castle over Christmas, and infinite food, irresistible. All the Weasleys were staying, so Harry surmised that the Weasley parents might want to get value for money from their education.

After an hour on the train, Hermione looked up, cast a locking charm on the door and said

"So who is she?"

"Who is who, Hermione?" asked Harry.

"The witch you're contracted to"

"Can we not do this" said Harry. "I don't like her, she hates me, we can't get out of it."

"Harry?"

"What, Hermione?"

"Is there another witch you'd rather be with?" she asked.

"Not really" said Harry.

Hermione's eyes did a … thing.

"I still like you Hermione, you're my best friend" said Harry.

"Best friend?"

"Well, Ron's my best mate, but he's not my best friend" said Harry.

"I'm you're best friend?" asked Hermione.

Of course Hermione. You're like the sister I never had" said Harry sincerely.

Hermione gave Harry a watery smile and raised her book.

He didn't hear anything out of her all the way to Kings Cross. 'Must be a good book' he thought.

-==0==-

Kings cross, Platform 9 3/4

Sirius grabbed him, hugged him and said "Come on, Christmas shopping to do"

"What" asked Harry

"Well you need to buy Miss Greengrass something, and I need to buy her family something."

"I suppose so"

"You suppose so. We're going there for Christmas lunch"

Harry's heart fell "Not with her..."

"Oh you two will get over it" said Sirius. "Once the snogging starts, you'll soon both be gagging for it."

-==0==-

Christmas dinner was awkward.

Sirius and Harry sat at one end of the table, and Daphne was forced to sit next to Harry.

"Greengrass"

"Potter"

After dinner, they exchanged gifts.

Daphne had got him a wand holster… which was actually a great present, come to think of it.

"Thank you, this is great" said Harry honestly.

Harry felt terrible, because he'd only got Daphne a box of chocolates and a book on runes.

She opened the parcel and looked surprised. "Chocolates from DeThierry's and Strowager's On exchange runes"

"I'm sorry" said Harry.

Daphne looked up "This is a… great gift ...Harry" she said, straining over saying Harry.

She settled down on the couch with the chocolates and swatted Astoria's had when she tried to take one. "These are from DeThierry's, and they are mine. Get your own"

Harry retreated to Sirius, who was watching , looking amused "Sirius, why didn't we just get Honeydukes"

"Because DeThierry's are a fancy french brand, and your Daphne clearly appreciates them"

Daphne was currently nibbling a chocolate, while reading the book on runes.

"You set me up"

"Harry, you can give a girlfriend Honeydukes, keep it in the cupboard, but to really impress a witch, you pull out the stops and buy something more exclusive. Though as you'll never have an ordinary girlfriend, you can skip the whole Honeydukes thing."

"No he can't" said Daphne loudly "I expect to be supplied with essentials, like Honeydukes and sugar quills"

"Good thing you can go to Hogsmeade to stock up" said Sirius, winking at Harry. Harry rolled his eyes.

"What is it with witches and Sugar quills" said Harry.

"Harry, don't wonder. Just supply your betrothed and bask in her love" said Sirius.

Daphne stared at Sirius, and Harry wondered again when she would master magically skinning by glaring. Fairly soon, he guessed.

Harry got dragged off by Astoria for a chat

"So, what do you like?"

"Flying, quidditch, um… exploding snap, exploring the castle." said Harry.

"Well Daphne likes hating you, telling mother and father how much she hates the contract, and you, and some other boring things, like horse riding, Gobstones, choir."

"Gobstones" said Harry incredulously.

"She's very competitive" said Astoria. "Won't stop till she's won."

"uhuh. The choir thing was very good"

"She's been in it since first year. Some years they put on actual performances in the great hall". They're doing one this year, she's been talking about it"

"When is it" asked Harry.

"June" said Astoria.

"Oh" said Harry despondently.

"What?" asked Astoria.

"After her birthday" explained Harry.

"You'd better get her something good for her birthday, especially as she has to kiss you after that"

"That's why, oh."

"Are you two really gong to use the love potion?

"It's that or hex one another" said Harry.

-==0==-

Daphne approached Harry near the end of the visit.

"Potter, we need to organise a way to meet"

"uh, yeah" said Harry.

"Well, do you have an idea?"

"Go to a abandoned classroom and wait there, I'll turn up" said Harry.

"How would you know that?" she asked.

"I just… look I have a magical map of Hogwarts I inherited from my father. It shows everyone, so I if I see you in an abandoned classroom, I'll come."

"People will see you coming"

"No they won't, I have a cloak of invisibility from my father."

"Nonsense, your invisibility cloak would be worn out by now."

Harry pulled the cloak out of his robe pocket and pulled it on.

"That's amazing" said Daphne with wonder, as Harry wasn't there.

"Now if you can wear that all the time we're married, that would be good" she said.

Harry took off the cloak and put it away.

"Now you can't tell anyone about the map or the cloak" said Harry.

"Of course, family magic" said Daphne, matter-of-factly.

"Your classroom idea is usable but flawed. We really need some way of sending a message to meet up" she said.

"We could use owls" said Harry.

"Please, your owl is very beautiful, but rather distinctive."

"Hedgwig. Her name is Hedgwig." said Harry.

Daphne smirked "The other woman in your life, or rather the other other woman."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you need to let Granger down gently."

"Granger, you mean Hermione?" said Harry, confused. "She was asking me I if had some other witch I fancied other than being contracted to you on the train too."

Daphne's eyes narrowed briefly.

"I told her no." said Harry.

"And how did she take that?"

"It was a bit odd, but I reassured her that she's my best friend, really she's like a sister to me"

Daphne's face blanked. "You said that to her?"

"Well she's been like a sister to me for years. My second friend, really better than Ron"

"Well, I see" said Daphne.

"Then she got all caught up in her book for the rest of the trip" said Harry.

Daphne looked at him oddly, and walked off back to her book and chocolates.

-==0==-

The trip back to school was noisy, with everyone showing off their presents.

Hermione seemed preoccupied with books again.

-==0==-

Harry and Daphne made a habit of running with Hermione in Running club.

Harry ran with Hermione and Daphne ran with Hermione.

A little jostling on corners and they managed to stay within arms length.

-==0==-

A few weeks into term, Harry received a heavy book sized parcel from Sirius.

He took care to open it in his bed, with the curtains closed just in case.

It was a pair of mirrors and a letter.

'Harry, these are communications mirrors. You hold it, and say the name of the other person, and their mirror heats up. We used to use them to talk between detentions and organise pranks. I think you said you needed a way to contact Daphne and vice versa. The one with a stag on it is called Prongs, and the other one is with the awesome grim is called Padfoot. I was going to keep one, but your need is greater, what with the contract starting to really bite after Daphne's birthday.

When you get called, the mirror heats up.

Good luck and enjoy the kissing.

Sirius

'

It took a day or so, but Harry managed to slip Daphne a note to meet in the second classroom on the third floor after dinner on Saturday.

-==0==-

"Well what?" she asked crossly.

"I've got a way for us to communicate quickly" explained Harry.

Harry explained about the communications mirrors.

"These are very rare" said Daphne.

"Well, if you need me, just call prongs"

'"Why is it prongs"

"Because my Father was an animagus, in the from a a stag. So antlers, so prongs" said Harry.

"He learned to be an animagus while he was at school?" asked Daphne.

"In fifth year, I think" said Harry.

Daphne pocketed the mirror.

"Whats mine called?"

"Padfoot."

"What's it named after"

"Well, Sirius is an animagus, in the form a Grim" said Harry.

Daphne's' eyes grew large "Its… hard to believe"

"Believe it. He licks himself when he's a dog" said Harry.

Daphne snorted then laughed outright . "He doesn't" she said.

"He does. Thinks' nobody notices if he sits in the corner and does it" said Harry.

"Are you joking?" asked Daphne, flushed from laughing.

"Only a little. His friend Moony makes those jokes"

"Moony?"

"Family friend"

"Who can turn into something too?" asked Daphne.

"No, he's just a werewolf" said Harry.

"Oh. Like Professor Lupin"

"Yes" said Harry. "Not all werewolves are evil, and Moony is very careful to take his Wolfsbane potion and lock himself away"

Daphne looked at Harry with narrowed eyes "There's more to all of this isn't there?" she asked.

"Not my secrets to tell. After we're married, with the loyalty clause, you will know all of it." said Harry.

"But you don't trust me" said Daphne.

"I don't know you. How can I trust you when we both hate each other." said Harry.

"We should hate the contract, not each other" suggested Daphne.

"Well, yeah, but we still don't like each other"

"True"

-==0==-

The day after Daphne's birthday, they met in an abandoned classroom.

"So this is it" said Harry nervously.

"Yes"

"Do you want to use the potion" asked Harry.

"No" said Daphne. "I want to get this over and done with, and not..."

Daphne started to cry.

"What's wrong?" asked Harry.

"You're what's wrong. MY first kiss, and it has to be with you, I don't even like you" she cried.

"I'm sorry" said Harry.

"You're always sorry!" said Daphne angrily.

"Well I am, it's not like this is the first kiss I wanted either" said Harry.

"We'll start by hugging." said Daphne with a sigh.

Harry walked right up to Daphne and they hugged awkwardly.

"Now, we ruin our first kiss" said Daphne.

Daphne turned her head sideways a bit and leaned in.

Their lips touched. It felt odd. Daphne smelt of peppermint.

Daphne broke the kiss and sighed "And now we have to swap spit."

Harry felt dubious and it must have showed on his face.

"Oh come on I'm not hideous" said Daphne.

"No, you're very pretty actually" said Harry, unthinkingly.

Daphne startled, pulled away from Harry.

"Are you getting weird?" asked Daphne

"We have to kiss and swap spit. In two years we have to get married. This all weird." said Harry.

Daphne sighed, and leaned forwards.

Harry leaned forward a little and their lips touched. Steeling himself, he stuck out his tongue, and after an awkward moment of pressing his tongue against Daphne's lips, she opened her lips and he got the oddest feeling. After a moment, he pulled his tongue back, and withdrew.

"That was weird" he said.

"You were a typical man. Penetrating the innocent woman" said Daphne.

Harry felt terrible. He went pale. "I'm sorry, I.. um, we … oh bother." he said.

"And if you think I'm doing that you you!" said Daphne.

"Oh you have to next time, it's your turn." said Harry, dropping the loose hug.

"Ew!" explained Daphne.

"There's always the potions" said Harry.

"What, and risk getting up to something with you, not likely." said Daphne.

"It's not that powerful" said Harry. "It's in most potente potions, and the book says ..."

"Would you risk potioning yourself and doing… stuff as a result" asked Daphne.

"Er, no that's gross." said Harry.

"Says the boy that swapped spit."

"I happen to want to taste sweet things" said Harry.

"That's laughing, you have to make me laugh."

"Whats the penalty for the spit than?" asked Harry

"We get sick and have to hold one another to get better"

"Okay… like I said, two weeks, your turn to do the tongue." said Harry, upset.

"Why are you so upset."

"I really like treacle tart" said Harry.

"Not for much longer, besides, Tiramisu's miles better" said Daphne.

"Tira-what"

"It's an Italian desert, made of cream, chocolate, coffee cream cake, all in layers"

"And it's sweet?"

"Well, not soon, mister un-funny" said Daphne.

"Ditto" said Harry.

"I am so funny"

"Prove it"

"What do you call a man with no brain" said Daphne.

Harry snorted.

Daphne put her nose in the air.

Harry started to leave

"What about me?" asked Daphne.

"Well, I don't think you need to be any sweeter, princess" said Harry.

Daphne scowled and drew her wand. Her spell faltered as she cast it.

Acting on instinct, Harry cast a tickling curse on Daphne.

Her wand dropped and she jerked about, snorting, then laughing.

Harry stopped the charm.

"A tickling curse! you hit me with a tickling curse!"

"And you laughed!" said Harry.

"Why you!" she said and hit Harry with a tickling charm.

She left the spell on and Harry, after snorting, laughing, slid down to the floor and rolled uncomfortably. "Take it off" Harry begged, his eyes watering.

Daphne lowered her wand.

"You've worked it out" said Daphne.

"You showed me. Can't curse me, not really, can you"

Daphne tried to cast a stinging hex, and it failed.

"Sit down on the floor" said Harry.

"Why?" asked Daphne

"So I can try a stunner" said Harry simply.

"No I'm not getting my robes dirty sitting on the floor." said Daphne.

Harry pointed his wand at a chair, summoned it closer, and scourgify'd it clean.

"A chair" he said.

Daphne sat down carefully. "And no touching me when I'm out" she said firmly.

Harry gulped "I'd never..." said Harry.

"Good" said Daphne.

Harry shot a stunner at Daphne and she slumped, unconscious.

A quick 'rennervate' and she was awake. "That's quite unpleasant" she said.

"But we know the limitations of the contract. We can't injure each other, but we can stun, and tickle" said Harry.

"If we Ever have to duel in public, you'd better use stunners" said Daphne.

"Understood. But the tickling curse is a neat loophole for the laughing clause" said Harry.

"I'm not so sure it's accidental" muttered Daphne.

"what?" asked Harry.

"Well, I can make you laugh, you just aren't funny." said Daphne blandly.

"My Sirius joke worked." said Harry.

"your dirty joke about your godfather"

"Yes, after all, he turns into a dog, then he goes in the corner and licks his..."

Daphne snorted.

"All our jokes are about your godfather" said Daphne.

"He's larger than life." said Harry.

"What about your dad with "Call me Gary" asked Harry.

Daphne glared at him "That is funny once. He does it over and over again"

Harry snorted, "like Sirius and his "I am Sirius" line.

Daphne frowned

"You ask him if he's joking and he says. "No I'm Sirius'"

Daphne groaned "Not funny"

"Only once, and you've already heard it twice" said Harry.

"I think it's because he's less funny than me, just like you are" said Daphne.

"Less funny than you?" said Harry.

"What do you call a man with no brain?" asked Daphne.

Harry snorted.

"See, I'm naturally funny, you and Sirius are not." said Daphne, smiling.

"It's lucky for you I'm good at the tickling curse then" said Harry, with a tiny grin.

Daphne frowned and left.

-==0==-

Two weeks later.

"So, ready?" said Harry.

"Have you cleaned your teeth?"

Harry looked guilty.

"The charm is recens spiritus, just point your wand in your mouth."

Harry casts the spell and it's faintly tingly in his mouth.

He stares pointedly at Daphne.

She huffs and casts the spell.

They advance and hug loosely.

"Remember, you do the tongue" said Harry.

Daphne stand there.

"Hey, the kiss?"

"You're the boy. You lean forwards"

"Oh no. equality in all things. I did it last time, you do it this time."

Daphne blinked at him "Equality in all things?"

"Oh course, how else?" said Harry.

Daphne leaned forwards and kissed Harry, and for a moment, it wasn't weird, then the tongue thing. And the spit, and she leaned back.

Harry let go and stepped back.

"Now, if you could make me laugh, Miss Greengrass." asked Harry.

"What do you call a man with no brain?" asked Daphne.

Harry snorted.

"Like hexing fish in a barrel" she said sourly.

"How's the tiramisu?" asked Harry.

"The elves only make it infrequently" she said.

"So do you need a laugh?" he asked.

"Get on with it" she said crossly. "I had to use three sugars in my tea this morning."

"How do you find an old man in the dark?" asked Harry.

"huh"

"It's not hard" said Harry.

Daphne stared for a second, then went pink and snorted.

"Where did you get that?" she said.

"Dorm. I just asked for someone to tell a joke" said Harry, smiling.

Daphne shook her head. "That was awful"

"Oh, that's a nice joke, Seamus told me a limerick, and it's too dirty to repeat"

Daphne's eyes grew large as saucers.

"I couldn't tell it to a girl" said Harry, blushing

"That bad?" she asked.

"Worse" said Harry.

-==0==-

The year dragged on.

OWLs loomed.

Hermione started to lose it.

Harry found running every morning was good.

He was running along when he looked over and found himself admiring Daphne's running body.

She was getting curves in places. 'Snap out it' he thought., and sped up.

Half term came and all the fifth years stayed at Hogwarts, cramming.

Harry's mirror heated up

He dashed up the stairs from the common room to his dorm and answered "Hi" into the mirror.

Daphne glared at him through the tiny frame "Room 31 on level four. I can't taste sugar, and I feel like I'm coming down with something."

Harry recovered his books and notes and bolted out the portrait hole.

He made good time, the school halls were free of traffic and once he got to the fourth floor he pulled on his cloak.

Daphne was standing in room 31, which had a surprising set of metal benches instead of desks.

"Hello" he said, taking off the cloak.

"A joke. Now!"

"Why do mice have little balls?" Harry asked.

Daphne frowned.

"Because they like to dance" he finished.

She looked at him darkly.

"Why did the widow wear black garters?"

Daphne rolled her eyes.

"In memory of those who had passed beyond" said Harry.

She snorted.

"I broke my finger last week" said Harry.

Daphne shrugged

"On the other hand, I'm okay" he said.

She snorted again. "Your dorm mates are terrible jokers"

"What do you call a pony with a cough?" asked Harry.

She shrugged.

"A little hoarse." said Harry.

She snorted again "Potter, you're sad"

Harry walked over and held her gently. She sighed.

"I'd like a real hug, a real kiss, from a real boyfriend, not you, not because of a cursed contract"

"Well, we don't always get what we want in life Daphne." said Harry, and kissed her gently.

"Hey, you didn't do the spit"

Harry reached up with one hand, held the back of Daphne's head and kissed her firmly, with tongue.

He released her and she stared at him "That was a bit.. much" she said.

"I thought, what would a kiss be like, if it wasn't just a workaround for a curse" said Harry, tearfully.

"Our lives suck" said Daphne.

"How's revision going?" asked Harry.

"Fine" said Daphne.

"So not great then" said Harry.

"Potions is hard to revise" said Daphne.

"Do you really want to do NEWT potions?" asked Harry.

"No." said Daphne

"Then do a good job, and accept that you might not get an E or an O in it."

"When did you suddenly get a grip on life?" asked Daphne.

"I spent my childhood dodging bullies, working like a house elf. Then at Hogwarts, I got attacked every year. That's stopped, but now I'm stuck in the contract with you. When I leave Hogwarts, I can probably live alright, I have a place to live, and enough money for food. Why worry?"

"What about me?" asked Daphne.

"Well, you're only a girl, so you don't eat much..." said Harry, yelping as he got poked in the ribs.

"Seriously, Can you support me?" she asked.

"I've got a vault full of gold and I'm heir to Sirius. I could get a job, I suppose." said Harry.

"You haven't thought about life at all?" asked Daphne.

"I wasn't expecting to have one. He-who-shall-not-be-named kept trying to kill me. The Basilisk alone nearly did."

"Basilisk?"

"Killed one in the Chamber of secrets" said Harry.

"Is it still there?" asked Daphne.

"Probably, only I can open the chamber" said Harry.

"You're the Heir of Slytherin?" asked Daphne, backing away, eyes wide.

"I'm an heir, maybe. Lord you-know-who was in charge of the basilisk." said Harry.

"Basilisk venom is incredibly valuable" said Daphne. "We sell potion ingredients. We can never get Basilisk venom"

"Well, I suppose we could see.." said Harry.

"Now?" asked Daphne.

"Why not, it'll only take an hour or so. We need to take a broom." said Harry.

Harry gave Daphne the cloak and went back to Griffindor tower and got his broom.

When he emerged from the portrait hole, he said softly "You there?"

Daphne replied from behind him "That's Griffindor tower, what a dump" she said dismissively.

Harry laughed and waved his hand "Come on" and led the way to Myrtles bathroom.

"Moaning Myrtles bathroom" said Daphne.

"Yeah the chamber entrance is here" said Harry.

Daphne squeaked when the sink opened. "You… the…."

"Yeah, so now we slide" said Harry.

The Basilisk in the chamber was long, green and dead.

The cool temperatures or perhaps the magical nature of the beast had preserved it.

"It's like it died yesterday" said Daphne.

"Oh this brings back bad memories" said Harry.

"How did you kill it anyway?" she asked.

"I rammed the sword of Godric Griffindor up through it's brain." said Harry.

"How do you do that without getting bitten?"

"I don't know. Phoenix tears heal almost everything." said Harry, wishing he was somewhere else.

Daphne looked at Harry "bullshit"

Harry pulled up his sleeve "See, here's the scar"

"Well how can we get this to my Father?" asked Daphne.

"I've got an idea." said Harry.

"Dobby!" Harry called.

Dobby appeared, wearing a woolly hat and a jersey.

"Master Harry Potter sir, Such a great wizard you are, So glad to see you Dobby is." said Dobby.

"Dobby, can you move this snake to Daphne Greengrasses father"

"Greenygrasses, Dobby knows them" nodded Dobby.

Daphne frowned "Why do you have a Malfoy house-elf?"

Dobby turned and berated Daphne "Dobby is a Free Elf, Dobby works for Hogwarts and gets paid, and works for Mister Harry Potter, and gets paid for that too" said Dobby.

"Dobby, this is Daphne Greengrass. We're engaged, I guess. So one day we'll be married" said Harry.

"Master Harry Potter is so Great. Greenygrass will be Potter one day." said Dobby insanely.

"Yes Dobby but not for a few more years" said Harry.

"Does Great Master Harry Potter want the snake moved now?" asked Dobby.

"If you would, Dobby. Tell Mister Greengrass Harry Potter sends his regards" said Harry.

"Master Harry Potter Sir, It may take Dobby some time to move the snake" admitted the house-elf.

"Take your time Dobby." said Harry gently.

"Well, that's the Chamber of secrets" said Harry.

"Does it have any other secrets?" asked Daphne.

"I don't know." said Harry. "I was in a hurry"

-==0==-

The day after OWLS, Harry was finishing breakfast when an eagle owl dropped off a letter for him.

He picked it up

'Harry Potter,

Dear Harry.

I was somewhat surprised to find a Dead giant basilisk outside my house.

The elf said It was Harry Potter sending it, but was a bit incoherent.

I've got it in a warehouse, and have experts harvesting it.

It looks like Greengrass Potion ingredients will have Basilisk venom for sale for some time.

You stand to make a fortune from this. So I'll never bother asking if you can support Daphne.

Well done.

Cyrus Greengrass

'

Harry snorted, and looked over at the Slytherin tables. Daphne Greengrass had just finished folding up a letter and putting it in her robes. She glanced in his direction, and smiled crookedly, fleetingly.

-==0==-

Harry and Ron watched Hermione wind tighter and tighter over OWLS.

Harry had found the exams difficult. Running was helping him, and the sight of the sixth and seventh year girls running was doing something for him.

Nothing was left inside him at the end of exams. He just wanted to get on the train and go home.

Hermione kept discussing exam questions obsessively with anyone who didn't flee.

Harry knew he needed to catch up with Daphne again, the Treacle tart was starting to lose it's sweetness again. He went to his bed, closed the curtains and got out the mirror. "Padfoot" he called.

The mirror waited, reflective. Harry waited. After ten minutes, he got out the map and looked for her instead. She was in the Slytherin dorms, in a group of names he recognised as his year.

He called out again "Padfoot". Finally her footprints moved, and went to what he guessed by it's size was a bathroom.

The mirror cleared and he saw Daphne, in a bathroom stall

"What is it Potter" she said crossly.

"I need to see you. I can't taste sugar" said Harry.

"I'm busy. With my friends" said Daphne.

"Oh, I … well , see you later" said Harry.

"Yeah whatever" said Daphne and the mirror went back to being a mirror.

-==0==-

Harry thought about seeing Daphne on the train but discarded the idea. There was no way it would be private enough to tell jokes.

Hermione was reading a book, but fell asleep once the train started moving.

The trip was long, Harry was tired and he dozed off too.

Harry awoke to Ron shaking his shoulder.

"Harry, it's the trolley witch. D'ya want some sweets?" said Ron softly

"Oh Ron, look I don't feel like sweets" said Harry.

Ron waved to to the trolley witch, and she moved to the next compartment.

"Harry, are you feeling alright?" asked Ron.

Harry lay on the seat, feeling the first stages of a bug… but knowing it was just the curse.

"Look Mate, I'll be alright. I think I need some more sleep." he lied.

"Harry, you never pass up sweets on the way home" said Ron 'And you buy your good buddy Ron enough to feed an elephant' thought Harry.

"Well Ron, there's a first time for everything" said Harry and closed his eyes.

Harry awoke and the train had stopped. Hermione was getting her trunk down; probably that or Crookshanks that had woken him.

Next to him, Ron drooled on the bench seat.

Harry sighed and stood up, achingly getting his trunk down.

"Ron, wake up" said Hermione, shaking his shoulder gently.

Harry looked at at friends, and suddenly saw, in the tender look on Hermione's face, love. It was then that Harry realised that Harry, Ron and Hermione was soon going to be Hermione and Ron, with Harry. Harry's heart died a little, he knew that no witch would ever wake him lovingly. He was going to marry Daphne Greengrass, and they cordially disliked one another.

He really was growing up to be a proper pure-blood lord, complete with loveless marriage and wife who hated him. He suddenly felt so incredibly sorry for himself, he burst into tears.

Hermione turned to him and her face showed her shock. Her tired friend had burst into tears, for no obvious reason.

"Harry, what is it?"

"It's.. just, my life. My so called life. I'm never going to kiss a girl I like, feel love" cried Harry.

"Sure you can Harry, lots of birds would go out with you" said Ron.

"Ron, Harry's trapped in one of those old marriage contracts. He and the witch don't like each other" said Hermione.

"Blimey mate, you should have said." said Ron. "I'm sure Hermione and I could work something out. We did all that work for Buckbeak."

"Ron, the contract is cursed, if either of you read it, well, the… their Lawyer ended up in St Mungos"

"Bloody hell!" said Ron. "Are you sure there's no way out"

"Well, if she died, and her sister" said Harry, and regretted saying anything.

Hermione was frowning, trying to work out who it was.

"The contract will bind with up to thirty years age difference" said Harry, trying to muddy the waters a bit.

"Erk" said Ron "You could end up with some really old bird"

"Ron, stop now" said Hermione "You're not helping and Harry doesn't need to be reminded"

"I got so lucky on the first contract" said Harry "Though it was Voldemort's bastard daughter, because she was a bastard and a halfblood, Sirius could just rip up the contract"

Ron paled "I remember you were in the prophet for the ripping up"

"Yeah" said Harry, as Ron got his trunk.

Harry led the way to the exit, trying to give Ron a moment with Hermione.

-==0==-

By the time Harry side-along apparated to Grimmauld place, he was coughing.

"Are you sick Harry?"

"Just the courting clauses. OWLS you know, hard to make time"

"Harry, Daphne Greengrass is a fine looking young witch, surely you can make time for her" said Sirius, trying to cheer Harry up.

"Sirius, we don't get on, okay. We hug, we kiss, we get out of the same room as each other."

"You should have used the potion" said Sirius.

"We're both afraid of the potion. Neither of us had any control in this relationship, and the potion takes our minds away from us too."

"Harry, at least sniff the potion" said Sirius.

"It's not keyed" said Harry, who had read the instructions.

"Best time to sniff it" said Sirius.

Harry opened his trunk, rummaged in the sock pile and found the bottle. He uncorked it and sniffed. It smelt like wildflowers, broomstick polish and mown grass. He corked it.

"Well is that supposed to be some great revelation?" asked Harry.

"So, who does it smell like?"

"I don't know. A quidditch player, probably. Broomstick polish, wildflowers, mown grass"

Sirius's face fell "So not Daphne Greengrass then?"

Harry sudden thought of kissing Daphne, peppermint, parchment and chocolate.

"No, definitely not her" said Harry.

"Sorry Harry, I just thought… you might have grown to love her by now" said Sirius. He looked really sorry.

"Are you serious?" cried Harry "We Have to kiss, we Have to hug, we Have to tell jokes to each other. Not a recipe for love Sirius, too much resentment."

Sirius sighed "I'm sorry Harry, If I hadn't adopted you, this would never have happened."

"Sirius, can you say for sure there's not a dangling contract in the Potter vaults?" asked Harry.

"I can't tell Harry. I can't look in there. But if they did, it probably wouldn't be as bad as a Black contract" said Sirius.

"Oh Sirius, it not so bad. Even after we marry, we don't have to, you know." said Harry.

"Harry, being involuntarily celibate is pretty awful" said Sirius.

"Speaking of which, where's my new step-mother?" asked Harry.

"I, er, haven't found anyone who'd, well" muttered Sirius.

"Nobody will date you" said Harry.

-==0==-

Greengrass Manor, a few days later.

Harry and Daphne sit in a drawing room.

"So, we need to laugh" said Daphne.

"Yes we do, and I'm feeling sick, I assume you are too"

Daphne nodded.

Harry took the Amortentia out of his robes.

"Keep that way from me" said Daphne.

"It's unkeyed. Just take a whiff" said Harry.

Daphne rolled her eyes, but accepted the bottle, uncorked it and sniffed.

Her eyes narrowed. "It's odourless" she said.

"Not for me" said Harry, about to launch into a description.

He unstopped the bottle and took a sniff. It truly was odourless.

"You're right!" said Harry.

"Must be defective, I suppose"

"Good thing neither of us drank it" said Harry and Daphne burst into slightly hysterical laughter.

The sight of Daphne laughing, and the ironic reason why tickled Harry's funny bone and he couldn't help laughing too. He clumsily corked the bottle and put it back in his robe pocket.

"Are you laughing at me Mister Potter" said Daphne, pink faced and snorting.

"Certainly not Miss Greengrass" said Harry, snorting to a stop.

"Well that takes care of sugar for a week or so" said Harry.

"But we must still do that" said Daphne.

Harry took out the faulty Amortentia and uncorked it "And this is no good" said Harry "smells of nothing" he said. And sniffed. Smelt of nothing. He corked the bottle and went to stuff it in his robes.

"Spill Potter!" said Daphne.

Harry handed the bottle back "Smell for yourself!"

Daphne uncorked the bottle and sniffed "Odourless" she said hastily and corked it bottle, putting it on the couch.

Harry stood up "Well time for that" he said, and cast the mouth freshening charm.

Daphne stood and repeated the spell.

"Who's turn is it?"

"Yours" said Daphne.

"I'm sure it's yours" said Harry.

"Well we'll both do it then" said Daphne crossly.

Harry approached Daphne and held her in a loose hug. 'She'd got curvier this year.' he was sure.

He leaned forward with practised ease and they kissed, then Daphne's tongue split his lips apart. Harry waited a moment and pushed his tongue back, into Daphne's mouth. It was familiar, and not really unpleasant.

Daphne pulled her head back "Are you still feeling sick?" she asked blandly.

"I think so" said Harry, who was feeling much better but still like he was coming down with something. They leaned in and kissed again, Harry's tongue first to enter Daphne's mouth.

Harry's eyes closed.

They kissed for a while, purely for medical reasons and stopped, both breathing deeply.

Harry felt better than he had all year. "That was the right dose, I think" said Harry, opening his eyes. Daphne looked a bit flushed and her lips were pink and swollen.

"Yes, that was the right dose" said Daphne, stepping back.

"So, two weeks is now too long between doses, isn't it" said Harry.

Daphne nodded "Sweetness only lasts a week or so." she said glumly.

"The cold-like symptoms, they start in around a week" said Harry.

Daphne glared at him "That depends if I'm on my monthly or not." she said bitterly.

Harry gulped. "I'm sorry, I didn't realise"

"So I don't just feel bloated and irritable, I feel like I've got a cold, all because I need to kiss you. Of all people." said Daphne. Harry nodded "Just mirror call me. In fact, call me in three days, we can tell jokes and taste sugar"

"Oh thank you" said Daphne sarcastically "Helping out a poor woman who just want to curl up with a hot water bottle and some ice-cream."

"Well, if that's what you want to do, I'll get on out. We've done what we had to"

Daphne sighed "Yes, and thank you"

"Good afternoon, Miss Greengrass" said Harry.

Harry left the drawing room and was leaving when he was accosted by Astoria, in casual robes.

"Are you alright?" she asked.

"Why yes," said Harry

"And she didn't hex you?"

"No, she was irritable, but we did what we had to, and now we both feel much better" said Harry.

"It's just that Daphne's..."

"Having her monthly" said Harry drolly. 'Where did I get this utter lack of embarrassment from?'

"Yeah" said Astoria.

"We've had to do this all year, it's not the first time" said Harry.

"Oh no, do you two.. "

"None of your business, Astoria. But, no, we hug, we kiss, we tell jokes, we depart"

"You two aren't normal." said Astoria.

"The contract is basically a curse." said Harry. "We're bound by it. That doesn't mean we're ever going to be lovey with one another"

Astoria muttered "You poor bastard"

"Goodbye, Astoria" said Harry, and he flooed home.

-==0==-

Daphne dreamed of holding a man, kissing him, feeling love. In the dream, obviously the hugs were Harry's, because he was the only man she'd hugged, and the kisses were Harry's; she had no other reference but the love… it was a chimera, and when she awoke, she was left with the cold fact of the contract.

She got up and went to her dresser and sniffed her own bottle of the faulty Amortentia again. Sweat, beeswax and treacle tart. Nothing of consequence. Probably just going off. She opened the other bottle of the pair. Still the beeswax smell. Decomposing potions. They'd probably exceeded their shelf life.

-==0==-

Sixth year

Remus came back to Grimmauld place a few days before Harry left. He sniffed Harry and looked at him with sad, kind eyes "Oh Harry, I'm so sorry" said the werewolf.

Harry was haunted by the words, though the prefect's badge caused Sirius to mercilessly prank him.

-==0==-

Harry got on the train and went to the Prefect's carriage.

The new Head boy, another Puff, David Corbys greeted him. The Head Girl was Frobisher's little sister Helena from Ravenclaw, and she had a clipboard and a steely gaze.

Hermione turned up, in robes, with her badge on.

The appearance of Daphne Greengrass with a prefects badge surprised Harry.

'I mean her grades are good, maybe not potions, but then Snape is a useless git and mine are no better. Why am I surprised that Daphne, who never gets detention and good grades, and is calm, well mostly calm is a prefect. Come on, I'm a prefect, and I'm an ass. Sometimes.'

Daphne stood next to a nervous looking Draco Malfoy "Touch me and I'll break your arm in eighteen places" she hissed.

Draco looked across the carriage to Harry. Harry, felt the imp of the perverse, and smiled at Draco.

Harry looked around the compartment and noticed the room filling up.

…

Helena Frobisher got around to patrol schedules

"Now we're having mixed gender, mixed house patrols. Because, frankly I don't trust two boys, or two girls, and I certainly don't trust two… for example Griffindors not to let Griffs away with things. So Girls, you'll need to be prepared to hex your patrol partner. The witches smirked.

Harry realised the opportunity, but tried not to show too much interest.

..

"Now sixth years. Greengrass, Potter?"

"Oh please, that idiot" said Daphne. Harry knew she wasn't putting it on either.

Harry nodded.

...

"Come to me to pick out times after you get your timetables. First come, best times" said Helena.

Harry went back to the compartment with his trunk, and sat down. The thought of a whole year of not feeling sick.

"Harry" said Hermione crossly "You have to patrol the train, with Greengrass"

Harry got up and went back to the front car and collected an irritated Daphne. "Where did you run off to, idiot." she said.

They patrolled down the train, checking compartments, mostly for upset firsties.

Harry knelt down and explained to the small blond girl that no, they didn't have to fight a troll.

Daphne looked at him oddly as he shut the compartment door, they stood in the corridor of the gently swaying train.

"Why did you spend so long calming down one firstie?" she asked.

"Oh come on, she was tiny. Besides, fighting trolls is an elective in first year" said Harry.

Daphne looked at him, blinked and burst out laughing. "You ass" she snorted.

Harry snorted. "Thanks" he said. "I'm looking forward to treacle tart now". Daphne looked suddenly distracted. "Oh, if you're lucky there'll be tiramisu" he said.

"Come on, we need to protect firsties from the legends you and Granger made"

"I'd like to point out, it was Ron that knocked out the troll"

Daphne stopped "You're joking"

"No, I'm Sirius" he said, and laughed.

Daphne coughed and stood up straighter "Are you really?" she asked.

"Yeah, and he'd only learnt wingardium leviosa that day"

"Bull" said Daphne, shoulder checking him.

"No bull" said Harry, looking into the next compartment through the window and seeing third years, it looked like, all eating and playing snap.

Several cars down, they found seventh years drinking firewhiskey.

Harry opened the door and barged in, Daphne following.

"Congratulations, you've earned detentions, before the year begins." said Daphne.

"Piss-off Snake" said a large Griff, that Harry thought was James Peake.

"Peake. Language to prefects.. that's another detention" said Harry.

"Harry, my man, you're not Granger. We just want to have a few drinks"

"Sadly, if you'd carried it in in your trunk, I'd let it slide. But not on the train. The firsties are tiny, and you lot are big and drunk." said Harry.

"Harry, don't make us hurt you" said Peakes' buddy… who was Fitzy?

Daphne rolled her eyes. "Potter, stun them and I'll bag the contraband." she said.

"Letting a snake tell you what to do man?" said Peake.

Harry sighed, flicked his wrist and area-effect stunned all the sitting passengers.

He felt it in his magic… and sank almost to his knees, then Daphne grabbed his arm steadying him.

"I didn't mean all at once, you bloody showoff" said Daphne.

"Safest way" said Harry, wobbling and letting his intended hold him up.

"You're heavy" she said.

"You're tiny" retorted Harry.

"I'm only three inches shorter than you" protested Daphne.

Harry grabbed the luggage rack "Shut the door" he panted.

Daphne closed it and pulled down the blind.

"Oh, privacy?" asked Harry.

Daphne flicked her wand at the lock.

"Miss Greengrass, I find myself in a locked room with you, and five unconscious men" said Harry.

Daphne snorted and transfigured a sweets bag into a carry bag and put the firewhiskey bottle in it.

"Shall we search their trunks?"

"They're getting detention already." said Harry.

"You're right" said Daphne, and with waves of her wand, opened the trunks, then cast Accio firewhiskey.

Three more bottles came to her, which she caught one of. Harry dropped his wand and caught the other two.

Daphne held out the carry bag and he put the two bottles in it. Harry bent over to pick up his wand.

Daphne put the fourth bottle in the bag with a clink.

"So dropping all of this with Filch?"

"I think the Slytherin women's benevolent fund needs a bottle or two" said Daphne.

"If you'd said I'd have packed some for you. Nobody' going to search my trunk" said Harry.

Daphne took out a notebook and wrote down the compartment, and then asked Harry for names

"James Peake, Fitzwilliams, Backley, and Mervyn" said Harry.

"Bravo. Four, the year above you. Are you worried about retaliation?"

"No, they just want to drink. I'll do a butterbeer run and get them a case."

"A butterbeer run?"

"I've got a way out of the castle to Hogsmeade, then I pop over to the Hogshead and buy a case."

"And you never told me?"

"You never asked. You get all the secrets August 1997."

Daphne sighed, and wrapped her arms around Harry. "I feel ill." she said.

"Well, we know what to do" said Harry, who was feeling sick with tiredness, but kissed Daphne dutifully. Well, it wasn't bad. But just medicinal, just had to swap some spit because of the curse.

The way his hand held the back of her head, that was for balance on a moving train. Speaking of which made them rub together.

They kissed, medicinally till Daphne pulled back, out of breath.

Her lips looked very pink.

He picked up the contraband and gestured to the door.

Daphne held up one hand, getting her breath back.

After a minute, they left the sleeping beauties, with trunks flicked shut by Daphne's wand.

"Remember Potter, I don't like you" said Daphne.

"It's mutual" said Harry.

"And if we kiss so readily, it's familiarity. We've had to do it so many times" she said.

"Front carriage, to drop this off?" asked Harry.

"I need to abstract two bottles." said Daphne.

"Be careful in dorms with firewhiskey." said Harry quickly "Drunk witches can't hex".

"Oh I won't be the one drinking it." said Daphne. "I'm only selling it"

Harry shoulder-tapped her as the walked along "I feel much better about that"

"Hmh!" snorted Daphne.

-==0==-

The opening feast announcements were… odd

Professor Snape finally got to teach Defence. Professor Slughorn was taking back Potions.. apparently he was Snape's predecessor.

-==0==-

Griffindor Common room

The Quidditch team was celebrating their first win of the year.

Music is playing and everyone was drinking and eating… there was some butterbeeer and maybe some firewhiskey in dark corners..

Harry was dancing with himself, 'getting his groove on' as Sirius called it.

Suddenly, someone grabbed his hands and pulled themselves into his dance. Harry suddenly felt an enormous stabbing pain in his chest, in his throat. 'Gala clause…' he thought, and panicked. The room spun and he knew he was dying.

"Get away from me" he cried, "Get the hell away from me" and used his other hand to push the girl away from him. As soon as her hand left his the pain began to subside. He still couldn't breathe properly, and he staggered through the stunned crowd, to the wall, where he slid down it, to sit, hugging himself, shaking. The room stopped spinning eventually. His chest ached.

"Harry! Harry!" said Hermione shaking Harry's shoulder.

Harry tried to focus on Hermione, but he felt awful. God he needed the medicine. And now.

"What's wrong with you Harry?" asked Hermione.

"Contract… won't let me dance with anyone else" said Harry, trying to see only one of anything.

For some reason, his pocket was on fire too.

"Harry, are you saying the contract did that you to you?" asked Hermione, losing it.

"Gonna vomit" said Harry. And did.

"Need the medicine" said Harry, wiping his mouth.

"Medicine? You need medicine" asked Hermione.

"Only cure" said Harry, lolling dazedly.

"Where's the cure?" asked Hermione, looking around "Do you have it in your trunk?"

"Greengrasses" said Harry.

"The Greengrasses have the cure?" asked Hermione

"Only them" said Harry, the room swimming in and out of focus.

"Ron" said Hermione. A slightly tipsy Ron Weasley stood behind Hermione. "Levitate Harry to the infirmary."

Ron shakes his head and, drawing his wand, floats Harry onto a conjured stretcher.

Ron and Hermione separate at the portrait hole.

Harry watches the ceiling as they head to the infirmary. He closes his eyes. Just for a moment.

He wakes in the infirmary. He feels terrible. He can see only one of anything now.

There's a commotion several beds away, and he can hear Pansy Parkinson's strident voice "She was fine, then she keeled over with chest pains". Some other girl he didn't recognise the voice of was talking then Pansy said harshly "Tracy, get a grip. Daphne's young" said Pansy.

Harry's addled mind lathed onto one word. Daphne. The medicine. He needed the medicine.

Harry sat up, surprising Ron "Harry mate. You should wait for the nurse" cried Ron.

"Just a tick" said Harry, in what he thought was a sneaky way and he levered himself upright, and staggered over to the other bed, scattering Slytherin girls like ninepins.

Daphne lay on the bed, shaking and pained.

Harry just pushed through the pain, walked over, leaned down and kissed her on the lips. The feeling of relief was instant. He needed the medicine, and slipped his tongue in. Oh the relief. He felt hands pulling on his shoulders, someone was yelling, but but didn't matter, the relief.

He felt a sharp pain in his back. Nothing compared to the pain in his chest. He kissed, holding himself up, one hand, holding her face with the other.

Daphne moaned. Her eyes opened. She blinked. He stopped kissing and pushed himself up.

"Idiot" said Daphne.

"Sorry" croaked Harry.

Daphne grabbed his head and pulled him back down. They snogged.

People kept pulling at him, yelling, they kept hexing him.

Finally he suddenly felt… nothing.

Harry woke up in a hospital bed. His back ached. His head ached. His throat ached, his heart, it hurt, but not so bad.

He tried to sit up, and couldn't move.

Madam Pomfrey appeared in his field of view. She was looking very cross.

"Mister Potter, you are restrained until Aurors can be called. You sexually assaulted Miss Greengrass, when she was already badly injured." said the medi-witch in a frigidly icy tone he'd never heard her use before.

Harry couldn't work out what to say. He sighed.

He lay, waiting.

Time passed.

There was a commotion and Daphne cried out "Where's Potter?"

Madam Pomfrey ran over and started saying something.

The distinctive sound of Daphne being very cross began.

"You imbecile. I need to see Potter now!" she cried out.

'She doesn't have the most phlegmatic temperament' thought Harry

"We'll protect you from him. Daphne" said Parkinson "I don't care if he's hospitalised. We'll stun him again"

There was the sound of a slap.

"Owwww!" yowled Parkinson.

"Where is my betrothed!" cried Daphne, not sounding anywhere near as loud as usual.

"Your what?" said Parkinson.

"Potter. Where is he!"

"Oh god she's been potioned!" cried Pansy.

"Oh fuck off you silly cow" said Daphne.

There was the sound of a thud, and a crash.

Daphne Greengrass loomed into view.

"There you are, idiot!" she said, and lay down next to him on the bed and proceeded to snog him.

The pain in his chest and throat subsided. His back still hurt like hell.

"Why aren't you moving?" asked Daphne anxiously

"Pomfey's got me restrained" said Harry.

"Madam Pomfrey" said Daphne angrily.

Madam Pomfrey appeared in the corner of Harry's eye.

"Miss Greengrass, I've got a purging potion, that should remove the effects of the love potion you've been dosed with" said the medi-witch kindly.

Daphne turned her head to look at Madam Pomfrey "I'm not potioned, you idiot. We're joined by a particularly vicious marriage contract and the only cure for the curses is to kiss. And swap spit. So if you don't mind, I'm taking my medicine. And un-petrify him. It's more horrible than usual. I feel like a pervert.

Madam Pomfrey wasn't clear enough for Harry to see, but he started to be able to move his arms. He did the obvious thing and held Daphne as best he could.

After a while, he could roll and tried to get comfortable, consistent with snogging the blonde.

His back hurt like crap.

Daphne's arm touched his back and he winced.

Then someone started yelling "Aurors, put your wands down"

Harry felt merely awful, apart for his back, but the more he snogged, the less his heart hurt, so he went with it.

Someone pulled Daphne away from him and he felt very Daphne-less as a result.

It took time to understand things and eventually he saw two Aurors arguing with Daphne and Madam Pomfrey standing around looking guilty.

One of the Aurors pointed a wand at him and Daphne just stunned the Auror. The second Auror reacted and stunned Daphne. Harry felt very unhappy, and also dizzy. He passed out.

Harry woke up, and his back didn't hurt. His heart and throat still felt like he'd run a sprint in deep mud. He lifted his head, cool, he wasn't paralysed.

Madam Pomfrey came over and looked at him sternly

"Can you just skip to the bit where I get medical treatment" said Harry.

"You have curse damage to the heart, lungs and throat." said Madam Pomfrey.

"Uhuh, now Can you do anything for that, or do I just drag myself off" asked Harry.

"Who cursed you?" asked the Medi-witch.

"My marriage contract did." said Harry

"Your what ?" said Madam Pomfrey, shocked.

"Black family marriage contract, dangling, caught me, and Miss Greengrass." said Harry.

"What caused it to attack you" asked Madam Pomfrey.

"The Gala clause. I can't dance with anyone else. Or I die." said Harry.

"And you were stupid enough to risk it, given that you knew?" asked Madam Pomfrey.

"I was dancing by myself, getting down, at the party in Griffindor common room, when some bonehead cut in on my and tried to dance with me." said Harry, dully.

"That still doesn't explain your assault on Miss Greengrass" said Madam Pomfrey stiffly.

"Greeny is the other half. So, to get better ,we have to snog. Swap spit." said Harry. "It's really simple"

"Oh, that explains why she jumped on you and started snogging you" said Madam Pomfrey.

"As if her life depended on it. Which, it does and mine" said Harry.

"That might explain why Hermione Granger roused Professor McGonagall, saying the Greengrasses had the medicine you needed." mused Madam Pomfrey.

"Sorry, I was half dead and loopy from pain" said Harry. "Technically, they make the medicine… Its' Daphne. Or her spit, depending on how technical you wanna be" said Harry, wishing he was asleep.

"And this contract is unbreakable?" asked Madam Pomfrey.

"We've weakened it as far as is possible" said Harry.

"You don't appear in public with Miss Greengrass" said Madam Pomfrey, accusingly.

"Well, she's a Slytherin, I'm a Griffindor, we don't really like each other much" said Harry.

"Yet you ...snog." said Madam Pomfrey, in a very sour tone.

"If we don't we get sick" said Harry, longing for sleep.

"Mister Potter, this is most irregular" said Madam Pomfrey.

"Sure is, now, where's my medicine?" asked Harry.

"Er, here's some water, you may be a bit dehydrated." said Madam Pomfrey, handing Harry a jug.

-==0==-

Daphne put a large box on Harry's lap. He sat up and opened it.

Inside were red t-shirts. The shirts had embroidered on them "Property of Daphne Greengrass", on the front and rear.

"I have badges to go over your robes too." she said.

Harry smiled a lopsided smile. "Sure thing. Anything to avoid dying."

Daphne smiled viciously.

"Do you have some for yourself?" asked Harry.

"Don't be silly, red's not my colour" said Daphne.

Harry laughed "Oh thanks" he said.

"So you got some Green sweatshirts with Property of Harry Potter on them or what?" asked Harry.

Daphne snorted. "I'm not property" she said stiffly.

"Don't be silly, it's the shirts that belong to you" said Harry, holding one up.

Daphne snorted "Keep trying"

Harry nodded , then his hand shot out and grabbed Daphne around the ribs and he tickled her.

She giggled and squirmed. "Stop it..." she said.

"D'ya reckon that was enough" asked Harry.

"Maybe." she sighed.

"Well, see how you go." said Harry.

"Everyone knows" said Daphne.

"Well, that's sort-of a relief" said Harry.

"No it's not." snapped Daphne.

"well, we could just wear rings like normal people" said Harry.

"These shirts cost money. You're wearing them" said Daphne.

"Okay, for running club" said Harry.

"Well, you could get some rings to prevent other people touching our hands." said Daphne.

"Cursed rings… use a curse to save a curse" said Harry.

The rings turned up from Sirius a week later with a note.

'

Set of four Cursed rings as requested.

If anyone but the other ring holder holds your hand, they get shocked.

I'm not giving you the ones that are more dangerous.

Your contract is second page news.

You're now famous as a victim of a black cursed contract.

Sirius.

'

Harry looked over the great hall and caught Daphne's eye.

She got up and he followed a minute later.

"Well what?" she said, standing in the front hall.

"Curse rings. Nobody can touch your hands without wearing the other one."

Harry went to hand Daphne the rings, to receive a stinging slap to the head.

"What'd you do that for" said Harry, resentfully.

"You will be putting the rings on my fingers" said Daphne.

"Oh yeah" said Harry. 'bad tempered.. oh… yeah'

"And that's also for nearly killing me by dancing with some slut" she continued.

"Weasley. It was Weasley, and she grabbed my hands while I was dancing" said Harry.

"You said you didn't like to dance!" accused Daphne.

"I was getting my groove on. There was a party" said Harry feebly.

"So you get to dance, but I have to look like a frigid bitch" she shouted.

Harry took one of Daphne's tense, fisted hands, and took a ring.

She opened her hand out.

"You're the only woman for me" said Harry, honestly and slid the ring on her ring finger.

"You'd better remember that!" she said, with a sob, and he put the other ring on her other hand.

"I'm sorry Daphne," said Harry, taking the other two rings and starting to put the on his had.

"Stop" said Daphne.

"What?"

"Hand them over" said Daphne.

Harry handed Daphne the rings and she grabbed Harry's open left hand.

"You're the only man for me" she said, and put the ring on his finger.

Harry started to realise what Daphne was trying to do, and he gave her his right hand.

She uncurled his fingers and put the ring on his right ring finger too.

"So, we're safer now" said Harry.

Daphne looked at him "You don't have any other rings?"

"Just these ones" said Harry.

"Not a heirs ring or anything?" asked Daphne, curiously.

Harry shook his head.

"I wish we could dance" said Daphne.

"We, dance?" said Harry.

"Well I can't dance with anyone else can I" she said bitterly.

Harry held out his hands, and Daphne held them, the rings fizzed slightly on his fingers.

Harry and Daphne awkwardly stepped from side to side, holding hands, not near each other, but dancing as best they could. 'The only way I can' said Harry.

"This would be easier with music" said Harry.

"So find a music box" said Daphne.

Dobby found one very easily.

"Your hand goes on my hip" said Daphne. "You hold my other hand"

After Daphne literally moved his arms one at a time like a pose-able doll, Harry was holding Daphne and they shuffled about on the tiled floor.

Some other students were staring. Harry saw and didn't care. He'd nearly died and this was an apology to Daphne. That it was the only dancing he'd ever do in his entire life… that was a weird thought.

Daphne said "You can turn us as we step"

"Not and not step on your feet" said Harry.

He look up from his feet and saw a few other couples sharing their lonely dance.

The music box wound down and Harry stopped. "So sorry" he said.

-==0==-

Harry found Ginny Weasley in the Griffindor common room.

"Miss Weasley" he said. He didn't feel very friendly, as she'd nearly killed him.

Ginny looked up at Harry hopefully.

"I'm cursed by a marriage contract and I can only dance with my intended, or I'll die, and so will she. So keep your hands to yourself. Never touch me again. You nearly killed me. " said Harry.

Ginny's face went pale. She looked mortified and about to cry.

"Oh and you owe me a favour from first year, so this is it. Keep your mouth shut and if any other witches look like they want a piece of me, you hex them." said Harry.

"You're a prefect, you can't tell me to hex people,. I could get detentions" said Ginny.

"I don't care. I nearly got a funeral. You're handy with a hex." said Harry.

"Who is she" asked Ginny.

"Literally none of your business. Push off carrot top" said Harry, angrily.

Harry stormed off up to his dorm room and put on Daphne's badge.

"Hi, I'm cursed, touch me and I die" said the badge, which flashed red.

'Not exactly the truth, but still, close enough' he thought.

Harry tromped back down the stairs to the common room and saw Hermione and Ron standing looking at one another. 'Get on with it' he thought.

He had prefects patrol that night. He found Daphne using the map as she left the Slytherin common room. He nodded to her from his position leaning against the wall next to the super secret exit of the Slytherin dorms.

She jumped "Asshole!" she said. "You startled me"

"Sorry" he said. They started in the dungeons, and slowly climbed floor by floor, checking the abandoned classrooms, the cupboards and the secret passages that were known snogging spots.

Harry was bored on the second floor and looked at the map to do a quick check "There's nobody there, we can go up to the third floor"

Daphne was furious "We could have just checked this stupid map instead of walking around all night"

"I'm not sure the map shows all the secrets, it doesn't show the chamber of secrets, for example" said Harry.

"There are no students snogging in the chamber of secrets" she said harshly.

"My dad and his friends made the map and they didn't get all of the castle. The might have missed a passage." said Harry.

"That we know about?" said Daphne dubiously

"Well it's been a couple of decades. One student finds it, soon we all know" surmised Harry.

"Hardly" drawled Daphne.

"Dobby!" called Harry.

Dobby appeared with a pop, a rag in his hand. "Harry Potter..."

"Dobby, look at this map and tell me, are there rooms or passages missing?" said Harry, handing Dobby the map. Dobby held it for a few seconds then bit the edge.

"Dobby, don't bite the map" cried Harry, pulling on the map.

"Sorry Master Harry Potter sir" said Dobby.

"Well?" asked Harry.

"The come and go room is missing." said Dobby.

"What's that" said Daphne, with a touch of sass.

"It's a room that is where us house elves store… lost things, because it can be whatever we need." said Dobby.

"The Room changes?" asked Daphne, sounding interested.

"You walks in front of it's entrance three times, thinking about what you need, and the door appears, and the room has it. Mostly we need somewhere to put spare mops and buckets." said Dobby.

"It's a magical mop room" said Daphne, drily.

"Oh no Miss Greeny, the room much more than that. The room of lost things be bigger than the Great Hall."

"Okay, we are going to see this" said Daphne decisively. "Where is it?" she asked.

"Seventh floor, opposite the tapestry of the trolls dancing" said Dobby.

"Dancing?" said Daphne, in a tone that Harry was starting to recognise.

"We're going all the way to the top" said Daphne.

When the door appeared, Harry was very impressed.

When the door opened to a cathedral like space full of lost and things guilty student had hidden, he wasn't so impressed.

"Potter, find a trunk in decent condition" said Daphne.

"Why?" asked Harry.

"Just do it" she said.

Harry dragged a potion stained trunk over to the door.

"Accio booze" said Daphne.

Harry spent the next thirty seconds casting cushioning charms.

"What do you want all this booze for anyway?" asked Harry "Are you an alcoholic?"

"I told you, I just sell it" said Daphne, putting the six sherry bottles into the trunk.

She continued packing firewhiskey and finally butterbeer.

"Can you find another trunk?"

"Why?" asked Harry.

"Because I'm going to Accio jewellery next"

An hour later Harry was impressed with Daphne's cunning.

She'd found a bucket full of, mostly junk jewellery and unpaired earrings, a small sack of coins; which she gave to Dobby, to give to Hogwarts "Always pay the house man," she said. "Though in this case they are house elves"

Then she started on potions. Not many good ones, but a good idea.

When she got him to summon wands… that was really sneaky. And there were a bucket full of them.

"We can take the wands to McGonagall to give to unfortunate students" said Harry.

Daphne blinked at him and just said "Untraceable wands. They're worth ten galleons each."

Accio gems had been interesting. Painful, but interesting, as they'd been pelted by shiny rocks.. "Gringotts will cash these" she said, looking at the bulging, dirty sack happily.

"Shouldn't' we be doing prefect things" said Harry.

"Check the map. If there's anyone obviously snogging, we go bust them." said Daphne.

It did only take a minute.

"Why are you so keen to make a galleon in here?" he asked.

"Well, you've only got the money from the Basilisk, plus whatever your parents left you. I'm trying to get us a nest-egg"

"They had a cottage" said Harry.

"I went there once for a history lesson" said Daphne. "The whole side's missing, the rain's got in. It'd need expensive repairs."

When Daphne told Harry to summon used parchment he baulked "That's junk"

"Humour me"

The cloud of parchment was immense and the piles of junk all fell about.

"Now what?"

"We bundle it up and get rid of it later." said Daphne.

"What?" asked Harry, not getting it at all.

"It's rubbish and it takes up space so we can't see valuable things. Bundled up it's much smaller" explained Daphne.

"Surely we've summoned all the valuable things" said Harry.

"You can only summon what you know of" said Daphne.

"Yeah" said Harry.

"So, what's out there?"

"Old furniture, clothes, bottles… junk, I don't know?"

"Are you infinitely thick?" asked Daphne.

"Well, no"

"Grandmother always said, never throw anything away"

"So we're gonna be hoarders?"

"Are you a wizard?"

"Well, yes"

"Can you transfigure things"

"Well, yes"

"So broken things are useful." said Daphne simply.

"What about the broken furniture"

"Can you cast Reparo?"

"Well, yes"

"Get cracking."

"This will take years!"

"We're here for two more years. Get back to work"

Daphne cried out "Accio size five women's boots"

"You're sorting boots with Accio?" said Harry as boots flew past into a lidless trunk.

"Why ever not?" asked Daphne, looking for another trunk to use.

"What do we do with things we don't need?" asked Harry.

"Sell them, duh!" said Daphne, wondering if Harry had been dropped on his head.

"Where?"

"We can sell them retail, to the shop in Hogsmeade, or rent a shop somewhere over summer and sell them ourselves."

"Our own junk shop?"

"It's not a junk-shop. We're turning opportunities into galleons."

"Knuts" said Harry.

"Don't knock knuts. Five and we've got today's paper."

"So"

"So we sell some size five boots for two knuts, today, and a few more things like that and we've got spending money. For nothing."

"Do people even buy this stuff?"

"Why not, repair charms are easy, so is colour changing. People don't buy much stuff, but cheap stuff sells. We paid nothing, so who cares if we sell it cheaply and quickly." explained Daphne. Harry realised Daphne saw the world differently to him.

"What about the furniture?"

"If you can Reparo it… good. Otherwise, your friend the house-elf… you give him some tools, I'll bet he can fix anything."

"Where will he get wood?"

"The worst ruined things" said Daphne.

"So we're selling furniture"

"No, we're investing in furniture. Otherwise we'd need to buy it later." said Daphne.

They worked late into the night.

"Where will we store all this stuff?"

"Chamber of secrets" said Daphne instantly.

"Not here?"

"Someone could take it. We're working to sort and repair, they could get our labour for nothing."

It was going twelve when Daphne, rubbing her hands over the sorted piles of boots and clothes called it quits.

"The out of date clothes are junk" said Harry.

"Costumes" she said "There's a shop in Hogsmeade."

"Oh and Potter, You're taking me to Hogsmeade" said Daphne on the way out of the room.

Harry must have looked shocked

"Everyone knows, and because it's a cursed contract, I'm getting less crap than I could have."

"Sure. This weekend?"

"Tomorrow night" she said.

"What?"

"You said you could sneak out. You're sneaking me out, and we're having a 'date' in Hogsmeade."

"We're prefects"

"So what" said Daphne. "I've made five galleons off that firewhiskey"

"What about the trunk you just got"

"Oh I expect I'll make ten or fifteen off that"

"Some of it's old, and half-drunken" said Harry nervously.

"And that's why I sell that to boys"

-==0==-

"What do you do all night" asked Ron.

"Practice Reparo, mostly." said Harry honestly.

"Eh, why?"

"I've got to get my own house after school, and furnish it. Broken stuff is cheap. So Reparo" said Harry.

"You're as bad as Mum and Dad" said Ron. "Always fixing everything. 'Cept clothes, they do get a bit thin to spell back to good"

Harry suddenly saw the Weasleys clothes and trunks in a different light. Their house was quirky, true, but nice, and their furniture used, but whole. He suddenly had the urge to talk to Mr Weasley about his family budget. How much do jobs pay anyway. Where do you get food, if you're magical. Harry realised he had no idea. But Daphne... she was already making them money.

-==0==-

Harry led Daphne to the statue of the humpbacked witch "Dissendium" he said.

Daphne got Harry to but three bottles of firewhiskey at the Hogs head, then they went to the Three Broomsticks, where she sat at a table, and Harry got then butterbeers.

"Potter, you're not completely useless" said Daphne, drinking butterbeer.

"Daphne, I, um… you really have good ideas about making money." said Harry, and dived into a butterbeer.

They took some medicine in the tunnel before they re-emerged out of the witches hump. It tasted of butterbeer.

-==0==-

Over the next week, Dobby's trip to Gringotts to drop off jewels made Daphne three hundred and twenty galleons. Harry was pretty sure that was a lot. The Jewellery made less, sold to a jeweller for materiel mostly, but still, another hundred galleons. The bucket of wands Daphne got her father to take to someone and they made four hundred galleons off it. By the end of the week, Daphne had made nearly a thousand galleons, and Harry was certain that the secondhand store, that was on the verge of being leased for next summer, would make a tidy profit.

Instead of organising via mirror, Harry just spent all his free time in the come and go room, fixing and tidying. When Daphne announced that the Hogshead would pay a sickle a crate for bottles, Harry was forced to admit that even empty bottles were worth money. Then, after casting 'evanesco' for an entire Saturday, that half empty bottles of dubious liquid were worth money too.

By second term, the piles of junk, once so high and disordered, started to look different to Harry, like piles of galleons, just not exchanged yet. They were getting less disorderly too.

One evening, after "prefect patrols" Harry leaned over and kissed Daphne, for medicinal reasons. It was as natural as drinking pumpkin juice.

Daphne had taken to doing silly impressions using the vast piles of odd clothes, to make Harry laugh.

"Accio wig" she cried and there was a tinkling sound like falling jewellery, followed by a dusty old wig flying over the mounds of junk.

"Did you hear that?" asked Harry.

"Yeah, jewellery"

"And it couldn't be summoned." said Harry

"So it's magical… and therefore valuable" said Daphne.

It took an hour to find it, a thin, corroded jewelled tiara.

Harry went to pick it up and felt a sudden unease. "There's something very odd about this" he said.

He could almost hear a chittering sound. "It's making a weird sound, and my scar hurts"

"Eeek" said Daphne, drawing back.

"Is it cursed?" asked Harry

"Hmm. I'll try a detection charm" Daphne cast something complicated and the tiara glowed a malevolent purple.

"That's cursed" she said. Harry bent down and really looked at it. His scar hurt. He fell over backwards and scrambled away from it.

"What is it Harry?"

"It's really dark. I've seen something like this before.. It had Voldemort's memories in it. We need to stab it with a basilisk fang." said Harry.

"Is it safe to touch?"

"No. Really really un-safe" said Harry.

"Well, get a box." said Daphne practically. "I'll owl father"

"Or we could get Dobby to go get one"

"With my letter. Otherwise Father will think someones robbing him" said Daphne sensibly.

-==0==-

The next night.

Wearing a pair of dragon-hide gloves covered in chunks of some kind of long-forgotten mortar, Harry stabbed the tiara. There was an ear-splitting shriek and a black cloud oozed out of the tiara and faded away.

"What the hell?" said Daphne.

"Well, that's distressingly familiar. I'll have to tell Professor Dumbledore" said Harry.

"I thought you didn't trust him" asked Daphne, frowning.

"And I don't" said Harry. "But he knows about this kind of stuff"

"What's your story?" asked Daphne, tilting her head.

"I found it in the room of lost things,stabbed it with a basilisk fang." said Harry.

"Don't be drawn on details" said Daphne.

Harry nodded.

Dumbledore was astonished. And upset, but let Harry sod off back to his bed.

As Harry had expected, Harry learned nothing… which was itself something; Hanging around with Daphne was doing thing to his brain.

'Mischief Managed' thought Harry.

-==0==-

Harry got an invite to a wedding at the Weasleys.

Harry hadn't been there much, but he knew the Weasleys, and Ron was a mate.

Ron's big bother, Bill who apparently was Indiana Jones (bless Sirius and the bankroll of pound notes) was getting married. To Fleur Delacour, who remembered Harry, and thought he should come.

Harry felt strangely sad... not that that was unusual, but he had to take her with him. So he wrote a letter.

'Daphne Greengrass,

Dear Daphne,

I have been invited to a wedding of some friends. As there will be dancing and I wish to stay alive, I would like to bring you as my date. It is in three weeks, and it is Bill Weasley marrying Fleur Delacour. The wedding will be at the Burrow, Ottery St Catchpole, Devon. Bill is a cursebreaker with Gringotts, as is Fleur.

Do you agree to come along? We will dance, obviously, and take in a wedding.

Harry Potter.

'

Daphne flooed over the next day. It was an interesting process; not their cursed wedding, but they had to turn up in outfits of equal dressiness; dress robes all round. And in colours that worked as a couple. In the end, it cost Harry two hundred galleons for their robes, and Daphne was very odd the whole time they shopped.

At the wedding Harry danced with Daphne to the best of his limited ability, and for a while, he cheated, closed his eyes and imagined that he was with someone he loved.

If he'd been a third party, he'd have seen Daphne had her eyes shut too. As it was, Ron and Hermione saw and thought they were being all lovey together.

-==0==-

Just before the start of Seventh year.

The secondhand store had netted five hundred galleons, and the rent had only been fifty.

"We're hiring someone to keep the shop running. We make more in a day than wages for a clerk, so by the end of the year, we'll have sold all the stock… including the warehouse and have a tidy pile of galleons." said Daphne.

"We should sell the stock to another shop, quit the shop like we planned" said Harry.

"Coward" said Daphne.

Harry didn't know what to do. So he asked Sirius.

"I wouldn't know the first thing about making money. Just do what Daphne says"

"But I've already argued" said Harry.

"And you might be right, but you might not be. You have to trust her judgement, she's made you two a pretty pile of galleons so far" said Sirius.

"She sells confiscated booze in the Slytherin dorms" complained Harry.

"Huh, we did that in seventh year" said Sirius chuckling. "Your dad would confiscate it, and sneak it past your mum and I'd sell it in glasses. Always sell it in glasses."

"Huh?"

"So nobody gets too drunk. Nobody resells it, And you know who's drinking what, and because you make more money" said Sirius.

Harry gave in. He suspected it was going to be a theme in his so-called life.

He went out to Muggle London, and found an arcade and played shooting games for a while. The game took all his money, and left him slightly over-excited. He supposed it was better than nothing.

-==0==-

Seventh Year started, as traditional, with Draco Malfoy visiting Harry on the train.

Harry was not a prefect this year; He'd begged off for NEWTs… and to spend more time turning the room of lost things into the room of galleons as a nest-egg. His cleaning charm was wordless now.

Besides, Ron and Hermione looked spiffy in their Prefect badges.

And as neither of them knew where Harry disappeared to, his evening Snog sessions… carefully metered out to every five days now, were going to be uninterrupted. Well except for fixing the growing mountain of furniture. Stacked neatly down in the chamber, it started to look like a real furniture shop.

"Potter!" yelled Malfoy, breaking Harry out of his revere.

Harry looked up from his textbook "Oh, Malfoy. Good to see you, How were the holidays?"

Draco shook with anger. "You can't ignore me. Just because you're betrothed to Daphne Greengrass, you're still a stupid halfblood."

"Actually Draco, as I did not choose to be Daphne's future husband, it's not exactly a thing I regard as positive" said Harry, in a bored tone.

"Her family is in the sacred twenty-eight, they're too good for you, you should be kissing her feet!" said Draco.

"And.. there we go again….I'm sure you're going to chose your bride.?" asked Harry.

Draco muttered and blushed.

"And I never get to" said Harry

"Greengrass is beautiful and pure-blooded, what's more to want!" said Draco.

"Thank you for complimenting her." said Harry. "But some love, ever, would be nice." said Harry drily. 'I'm starting to sound like Snape' thought Harry.

Silence from Draco and his goons.

"You'd be interested to know, Draco that the contract I'm under is much like the one that drove your dear Aunt Bellatrix insane. You know, how she's in Azkaban, has been most of our lives. SO If you don't mind, I'm trying to enjoy my life… what little there is left of it before one or other of us is driven insane by the curses in the marriage contract and starts hexing all and sundry." said Harry.

Draco snorted "As If, you two go to Hogsmeade, you're a normal couple."

Harry flicked his wand out and with a twist, tipped Draco, Crabbe and Goyle upside down.

"Malfoy, much as I find personally find Pansy distasteful, she at least likes you. Greengrass and I are cursed to be together, and been have to … do things to avoid the courting clauses cursing us. Ask your Mother about them, but be warned, you're only a hanger-on in the Blacks, so you can't inflict them on any of Your children.

"I'd never do that to a child of mine!" said Draco. "Its inhumane!"

"And calling a child Draco isn't?" retorted Harry.

His visitors sodded off.

Times like this, Harry really hated the thing called his life.

Daphne went past later, and didn't stop. She was still prefecting.

Harry went back to his book. Transfiguration was dead useful for fixing things, and charms for fixing things… and, well, turning evening into galleons.

"Oy Potter!" said Daphne Greengrass later, standing over him.

"Harry looked up "Greengrass" he said. 'Wonder what scheme shes cooking up now'

"Your trunk. Open it I'm searching it for contraband." she didn't seem to be kidding.

Harry looked at Daphne "Come on Daphne" he said.

Daphne flicked her wand and slammed the door. Another flick pulled the blind down.

"Open your trunk Potter, or I'll open it for you" she said.

Harry opened his trunk. In one corner, neatly packed were a case of butterbeer, and a bottle of firewhiskey.

"Contraband" said Daphne, and pulled it out, and put it in a carry-bag she conveniently had.

"You're honestly shaking me down for contraband" said Harry incredulous.

"And you'll get a detention" she said.

"Are you just getting back at me for arguing about the shop?" asked Harry.

"I'm getting free stock for my booze store. You, you get detention with filch for a night."

"That cuts into my furniture fixing time. That costs you money" said Harry.

"You argued. It's worth one days profits" said Daphne viciously.

She left. Harry really, really disliked her.

-==0==-

Professor McGonagall had words to say to him.

"Harry Potter, why are you always making trouble. Attempting to smuggle alcohol onto the school grounds. Your detention is quite justified. Prefect Greengrass has shown an admirable level of professional integrity, where you gave up prefect-ship to spend more time doing god-knows-what. If you had been bringing in perhaps some butterbeer, that would have been a different matter. Not firewhiskey. That was crossing the line. Enjoy cleaning toilets with Mister filch for a night."

-==0==-

A day later.

Harry was stacking some tables he'd repaired into neat, piles in the room of requirement when the door opened and Daphne Greengrass, prefect came in.

"Map" she said, without any preamble.

"Why should I let you use my map?" asked Harry.

"So that I can save the night for more profitable activities"

"You could have dumped being a prefect and saved more time"

"Seventh year prefect sounds pretty good on a CV." said Daphne.

"A job?"

"I could get a ministry job, keep my penniless husband" said Daphne.

"Who's actually rich and has a job restoring furniture, with the help of his friend Dobby" said Harry defensively.

"I might want a real job, something challenging." said Daphne.

"Well, do you?" said Harry, interested.

"I'm going to apply to the ministry, Department of Mysteries."

"What do they do?"

"Study mysterious magic" she said.

"Is the pay okay?"

"Better than selling furniture" said Daphne.

"Well, you do that, if you want to"

"You're not going to stop me, or fight, or complain?" asked Daphne

"No, you want to, if you can get it, go for it." said Harry, turning back to a table.

"Why are you so damn reasonable about that?" asked Daphne.

"Why not?" asked Harry, turning and looking at Daphne, curiously.

Daphne shook her head "You fight about keeping the shop open, but you don't care what I do for a job?"

"Oh, as long as you want to do it, feel free"

"Men" she said.

"You want the map?"

"Yes, now"

Harry handed his just-after the end of final-term wife the map.

She checked it quickly.

"Who's your patrol partner?"

"Weasley"

"Ron?"

"He shot off as soon as I said I as going to the library to get the map from you" said Daphne.

"Where'd he go ?"

Daphne scanned the map, folding out sections for awhile. "Broom cupboard with Granger"

Harry wanted brain bleach, but still snorted.

"Don't judge them, they actually like each other" said Daphne.

"So do we do it today, or wait three more days?" asked Harry.

"What, you want to snog early?"

"Might as well" said Harry.

Daphne looked at him "No" she said. "I am not sick, though I could use a laugh, needed two teaspoons of sugar this morning.

"You know we could get some fresh Amortentia..." said Harry.

"I don't think I'm ever going to want to do that" Daphne shook her head.

"Well I bloody do. I want to love someone, to feel loved. And the only someone can be you, because of some fucked up ancestors." Harry sat on the table nearest him.

"I just wish there was some way out of this." said Daphne, gazing across the piles of junk

"I have an idea" she said suddenly.

"An idea?" asked Harry.

"There's a potion that can change a persons family tree" said Daphne.

"It what?"

"It was traditionally used for blood adoptions. It ensures the adopted child becomes an actual descendant of their adopting parent."

"How would that help us?" asked Harry.

"You could take it, become someone the contract won't bind to, and the contract would be invalid."

"Why Me?"

"Because my heritage matters. You'd probably have to use it to become a bastard"

"A bastard"

"It would make the contract invalid"

"Invalid?"

"Like the one with the Riddle girl"

"So I take a potion of make myself a bastard and there we go" said Harry. "Great, who do you suggest I take on as my new father? Severus Snape?"

"Sorry, I was just trying to help." said Daphne.

"Maybe what's what we need to do" said Harry. "I'll owl Sirius."

-==0==-

The next day a letter came

'Dear Harry and Daphne,

Sorry Kids, it won't work.

Because I adopted Harry, that's all that matters.

Using the potion on Miss Greengrass might work but would ruin her life thereafter.

I did find an exit clause. It is guaranteed to work, but it does take five years. As long as you two don't have a child, five years after the marriage, the contract terminates.

Sirius'

"Well, at least it isn't going to be forever" said Daphne, and sighed.

"We don't have choices about being IN this horrible contract." said Harry.

"Don't remind me"

"And we're not going to like each other anytime soon" said Harry.

"Hasn't happened in a year" said Daphne sarcastically.

"Lets just leave that there" said Harry.

"Here's my idea. We're both chained to the same oar, right" said Harry.

"Indeed"

"So, I will try, from now on to make this horrible marriage thing as not awful as I can." said Harry.

"How?"

"Well, for example you wanted to dance right?"

"And we danced, poorly on the front hall of Hogwarts." said Daphne

"And at Bill and Fleur's wedding"

Daphne looked pissed off. Given that was how Harry normally saw her, he continued.

"We're in a room that can literally be anything. We can have our own ballroom. We can dance" said Harry.

"You don't want to"

"I like to get my groove on, proper dancing not that different, and it's make you happy" said Harry.

"And my happiness matters to you why?"

"We're chained to the same oar. We might as well not be miserable" reasoned Harry.

"So that implies we'll have as normal a wedding as we can?"

"Yeah, with dresses and flowers and all that stuff." said Harry.

"Not just a signature in a Ministry office" asked Daphne.

"Not that" said Harry.

They sat silently.

"So you see, my idea is that we accept the things we can't change, they are all awful. But I can be nice about it" said Harry.

"I'm not doing more than swap spit with you" said Daphne.

"Of course not. We just… we don't" said Harry.

"We don't." said Daphne emphatically.

"But we can hug, and we do know how to swap spit" said Harry.

"Is this all about you getting a snog?" asked Daphne.

-==0==-

Harry got pretty good at dancing in the rest of the year.

There was medicine after dancing.

-==0==-

Wedding day. August 3rd, 1997.

They were in a church near Daphne's home. All surrounded with muggle repelling wards for the day.

Harry walked up the aisle and waited for Daphne to arrive.

The officiating wizard was an old one, with wispy hair and glasses. He seemed cheerful. Harry and Daphne hadn't told him just how cursed their contract was. It wouldn't help.

Ron stood beside Harry, holding the rings. Over on the pews, in the front row left, Daphne's mother blew her nose. Astoria looked impressed with the pomp. On the right side, Sirius and Remus looked like serious adults. Daphne's friends and relatives on the left, Harry's on the right.

A Bridal march of some kind played; Harry had no idea what it was, but Daphne had liked it; played.

Daphne came up the aisle in a fancy white wedding dress. She did look very pretty once she lifted her veil. Her father Cyrus stood to one side and looked important.

Harry and Daphne recited the vows from the parchment; the vows they couldn't eliminate.

"I Harry James Potter swear an oath of fidelity; to cleave only to Daphne Isobel, forsaking all others. I swear an oath of loyalty to Daphne Isobel, to hold her secrets close, to defend her from all threats. I swear an oath of domesticity to Daphne Isobel, to find my hearth and home only with Daphne Isobel. These things I swear till the end of my days."

"I Daphne Isobel Greengrass swear an oath of fidelity; to cleave only to Harry James Potter, forsaking all others. I swear an oath of loyalty to Harry James Potter, to hold his secrets close, to defend her from all threats. I swear an oath of domesticity to Harry James Potter, to find my hearth and home only with Harry James Potter. These things I swear till the end of my days."

At the end of that Harry put an heirloom Potter family wedding ring onto Daphne's finger and she slid a gold band onto Harry's ring finger.

"I now pronounce them man and wife" said the officiator. Harry liked the sound of it, he'd heard the line in TV shows and movies and Daphne had shrugged.

Then they kissed publicly, just a quick peck.

They turned to the exit, and music played. Harry couldn't remember what it was called but it was music for leaving to.

He held Daphne's hand and walked slowly down the aisle out of the church.

They rode back to Daphne's house in a rented car, all the outside activities were arranged to be Statute Safe, so they could use muggle vehicles.

They got out and went into Daphne's parents ballroom. It was set up with round tables and chairs, all covered in white linen. They sat at the big centre table, Daphne smiled a lot at everyone.

Harry tried to remember as much as he could of what was happening. Daphne did look like a beautiful bride.

They were eating the first course when Daphne stopped. Patted her lips with a napkin and said "We're freer now than we were. No gala clause, no courting clauses. Just Fidelity Loyalty and Domesticity." she said.

Harry smiled at her "Well that's hardly difficult is it. Not being at risk of sudden death on the dance floor, quite a weight off my mind." he said.

Daphne laughed.

"Now, Mrs Potter, we should dance. It is expected" said Harry, standing.

Harry and Daphne danced slowly in the middle of the dance floor, their eyes shut. Daphne's mum cried, Mrs Weasley cried and Remus cried. Remus had started crying as soon as he got to the reception. His date, an Auror with Pink hair wasn't sure what to do with a six foot two werewolf sobbing. Sirius was watching, pensively.

After the speeches and dinner, Harry turned to Daphne and said "I have a present for you."

Daphne looked at him "Today is a pretty good effort, Potter" she said, a small smile on her face.

"I got Dobby and another elf to fix my parents cottage" he said.

"Oh, I don't think it would be good to live there" said Daphne quickly, her face falling.

"Oh I wouldn't do that. I can still remember them dying there. I sold it to muggles. And they paid an absolute fortune for it. I made two hundred thousand galleons." said Harry, winking.

Daphne looked at Harry "You made what!" she said, looking surprised.

"So I think we can afford a nice house and still have lots of savings" said Harry.

Daphne blinked, gave a sob and threw her arms around Harry and hugged him "You amaze me. I thought we'd have to buy or even rent something terrible. And you did this"

"So you like it" Harry asked.

"I think you've outdone yourself." she said and kissed him, briefly.

It felt like every other kiss, but with simple affection behind it. Not love, because, well they didn't Love each other, but it was the best kiss Harry had ever had.

Harry was pretty sure that he could cast a Patronus off the memory of that kiss.

-==0==-

Six months Later…

Harry apparated home from the shop, they'd sold a third of the furniture he'd repaired and it was less a junk store and more an antique furniture store now. The shoes and robes still sold, knuts piling up.

Dobby and his friend Winky had come to an arrangement of some sort, and they took the piles of furniture and other saleable goods from Hogwarts and stored it in a large barn. They hadn't technically paid to use the barn, but the muggle government owned it, and they hadn't used it in years, and as they never drive there in a car to tip of the muggles, it seemed pretty good at the price. It was a lot drier than the chamber of secrets, so Harry did a lot less re-repairing furniture.

Harry looked around and looked down a side-street of Hogsmeade. It was the easiest place to live, as a magical person, and the house had been cheap. Mostly because it needed a new roof, but with two willing elves, and a bunch of Weasleys who turned up at Daphne's parents house one morning and just said "We're off to your house to fix the roof", it had a new roof.

They had furniture… admittedly very old furniture and they'd only had to buy a couple of beds.

Daphne had done quite well in NEWTs getting 4 EE's and the rest A's, and got an entry-level job in the ministry. Supposedly in the DMLE, but Harry knew she was an unspeakable, in the Department of Mysteries.

Everyone seemed surprised that the boy-who-lived, and came first equal in the Tri-Wizard cup was running a furniture shop, with four EE NEWTs, but free publicity was free marketing.

Harry went into the kitchen and checked on the casserole he's set going in the morning. It was ready to eat, and it would not matter if Daphne came home now, or in an hour.

Harry sat down with the duplicate accounts books Daphne gave him and tried to do the accounts for the business for the day. It was difficult… not the maths, the accounting part.

He toiled away, and thought about eating. He didn't actually wait for Daphne to come home before eating, it was just a sort of almost joint meal.

The door opened and Daphne came in.

"Evening Dear, how was work" said Harry, setting the ledgers on the sideboard and getting out some bowls.

Daphne snorted "Fine. How was the shop?" she asked, hanging up her travelling cloak and washing her hands in the kitchen sink.

"Thirty eight galleons" said Harry.

"Today?" said Daphne, her hands still under the running water.

"Two tables" said Harry proudly.

"You're making my ministry salary look bad" said Daphne, turning off the taps and drying her hands on the tea-towel that hung in front of the wood stove.

"Only today." laughed Harry, spooning casserole into bowls.

"Whats' dinner?" said Daphne, sitting down.

"Griffin casserole" said Harry, putting the plates on the table.

Daphne flicked his ear "Chicken I assume?" she said.

"Yeah" he said, waving his wand at the breadbox and levitating some buns over to sit on the centre plate.

They ate quietly, saying what came to mind.

After dinner, cleaned up with some pretty fancy wand-work by Daphne, Harry turned on the Wizarding wireless Arthur Weasley hand given them as a wedding present, and tuned in the dance music channel.

They stood in the small-ish sitting room and danced slowly to the music, their eyes closed.

After half an hour of dancing, Harry went to his room and went to bed, and as usual, cried himself to sleep.

-==0==-

A month later

Harry apparated to the warehouse and looked at the dwindling pile of furniture.

Business was good, but the warehouse was emptying out.

'There's still lots at Hogwarts' he thought.

Being end of term in a month, he had an idea.

That night after dinner, he pulled out the marauders map and placed it on the dinner table.

"Hey Daphne, come see this… It's interesting"

Harry poked the locked map with standard revealing spells and the marauders insults began to show.

Daphne came around the table and looked and poked the map a bit with her wand.

She snorted at some of the insults.

"So how does it work?" asked Harry, "I solemnly swear I'm up to no good"

"Why are you using the map now?" asked Daphne, sitting down next to Harry, her elbows on the table.

"I'm thinking about going in with Dobby and Winky and getting more furniture. The warehouse is getting emptier." said Harry.

"I think we should get a warehouse we actually legally control. Not because I work for the ministry, but because the muggles could turn up and take all your stock" said Daphne, resting her head on her hands.

"You were okay with it at the time" said Harry, looking at his wife and wishing wishing he had love in his life.

"I found it" corrected Daphne. You're a mostly respectable business and if you keep going, we'll have a long-term business that keeps us quite comfortable."

"I'll eventually run out of junk from Hogwarts" said Harry.

"We can take some profits, use it to buy an estate sale" explained Daphne.

"A what?"

"A house gets sold with all it's junk. Houses get sold surprisingly cheaply, full of stock we could fix and sell" said Daphne.

"How did you find out about this?" asked Harry.

"The ministry internal newsletter lists the sales."

"The dirty dogs" said Harry, indignantly.

"You have your agent on the inside" said Daphne.

"In the DMLE" said Harry, and laughed.

Daphne frowned at him "It's a secret."

"So how does the map do the insults" asked Harry.

"It looks" Daphne cast a few strange spells "They come from some fixed lists"

"So nothing really clever" said Harry.

"The map's function is very clever. It's tied into the magic of the whole castle. Really it's very well done."

Daphne sat for awhile "You should tell me some secrets" she said.

'Oh yes, Mrs Potter, I would like to explain how to get into Hogwarts.'

"How?"

"The secret tunnel comes out in the basement of Honeydukes. It terminates on the third floor, in the hump of the humpbacked witch. The hump opens when you say dissendium"

"We used that for our date in sixth year" said Daphne.

"Not a lot of people know about it" said Harry.

"Who else knows?" asked Daphne.

"The Weasley twins, Lee Jordan, Sirius." said Harry.

"Why Sirius"

"Because Sirius, Remus and my Father made the map while they were at school" said Harry.

"I'm impressed"

"I'm mostly annoyed. Sirius's party trick with the will made me jealous." said Harry.

Daphne laughed. "The boy who lived, jealous."

"Daphne, I have a bigger secret" said Harry.

"Oh, are you gay?" said Daphne

"No, actually." said Harry.

"Oh" Daphne seemed disappointed.

"I may have… vanquished Voldemort." said Harry quickly.

"Yes in 1981." said Daphne nodding.

"No, again in 1994." said Harry. "With some help from Cedric Diggory."

"Okay."said Daphne,"This is a cup of tea story , or a cup of firewhiskey story?" she asked.

"Tea, we both have work tomorrow" said Harry.

"So it all begins in 1993, when I saved Sirius for a hundred Dementors"

Daphne coughed.

Harry pulled his wand out and cast a Patronus. It was a huge, glowing silver stag. Prongs pranced over and sniffed Daphne. She raised an a hand and felt the silvery mist.

"You've never showed me you could do that, I'm.. I'd say really impressed, but more.., wow." said Daphne.

"So I saved Sirius from the Dementors, and he escaped on the hippogriff that was supposed to be executed."

"How does that work?" asked Daphne.

'Hermione and I used time turner to ride the hippogriff to the tower Sirius was being held in, then he got out onto it. We rode back to the ground, got off and he rode off into the sunset."

"You had a time turner?" asked Daphne

"Hermione's schedule wouldn't work, she was taking every class, so she got a Time Turner and did them all anyway" said Harry.

Daphne groaned "That violates so many good guidelines for safe use of Time Turners" she said.

"You used to confiscate booze as a prefect then a sell it" said Harry.

"That just booze… she could have died" said Daphne.

"So Sirius was free, and I owled him… he gave me money and I had some good times that summer. Saw films, learnt muggle things." said Harry.

"Sounds nice" said Daphne.

"So in fourth year, I ended up portkeyed to a graveyard with Cedric, to be executed for Voldemort."

"That sounds adorably vague" she said.

"He only had one death eater there, and I got him before he got me"

"What about wh-who-shall-not-be-named" stammered Daphne.

"Well I'd killed the body he was possessing in first year, so he was only a black ghostly thing. They'd done something and got him into a baby like body, but deformed and red"

"A homunculus" said Daphne suddenly.

"Anyway, it was stuck under the death eater, couldn't move. His snake tried to eat Cedric"

"What were you doing?" asked Daphne

"I passed out. When I get near him my scar hurts, and I get huge headaches. Sometimes I see what he was seeing and feeling. If he's really happy , or really sad." said Harry.

Daphne looked very surprised by this and spoke up.

"Can I take some notes?"

"If it helps"

Daphne got a parchment and wrote some notes down.

"When Cedric killed the snake, there was some Voldemort magic released." said Harry.

"Some what?"

"A black cloud, it screams then fades."

"And you've seen this before?"

"It's the same as this cursed diary that possessed… well Ginny Weasley back in second year ,and the Tiara"

Daphne looked very surprised and took more notes.

"What did the diary do?" asked Daphne.

"Well, like Mister Weasley says, it would write back to you, and you couldn't see where it keeps it's brain." said Harry.

"Describe the interaction" said Daphne in a suddenly clinical tone.

"It was all full of Tom Riddle's memories. You could write in the diary and it would write back sentences." said Harry.

"Non-repeating?" asked Daphne abruptly.

"you could write about anything. It was like Tom was in the diary." said Harry.

Harry finished explaining about the Diary to Daphne.

She took lots more notes.

"And who knows?" asked Daphne.

"Ginny, and Dumbledore"

"And what does the Headmaster know"

"He's got the diary after I destroyed it, and the tiara. Cedric used bombarda maxima so there's nothing left of the snake. Voldemort,we dosed with the draft of the living death and transfigured into a pebble. We hid him in a cistern." said Harry.

Daphne blinked "I'm not sure if that's the most amazingly heroic thing I've ever hear, or just really annoying." she said, sounding annoyed.

"Annoying?" asked Harry.

"This is exactly what the Department does. Can I tell them?" she asked.

"Um, I suppose you'd better. Do you have any idea what the weird black smoke is?" asked Harry.

"It's definitely something very dark" said Daphne.

"Well, goodnight dear" said Harry.

"What no dance?" asked Daphne.

"It's a bit late" said Harry.

"Goodnight Harry, you brave man" said Daphne.

Harry went to bed and went to sleep, which was plagued by nightmares.

-==0==-

The next day Harry's search for a warehouse wasn't going so well.

That night, Daphne sat down before dinner and said "Harry, I asked my boss. They, well, they want to question you, and do some tests, and they really want the pebble. They'd like the book and Tiara too, but that's a Dumbledore issue."

"So should I let Sue run the shop tomorrow?" asked Harry.

"If you would" she said.

-==0==-

Harry's day was long, involved telling the same story, but to dicta-quills.

The unspeakable uniforms were grey, and you couldn't see their faces, and their voices were all disguised.

The diagnostic spells were, disturbing. The most disturbing part was the unspeakable doing the tests who ran off screaming at one point. Half an hour later, a junior unspeakable took Harry back to a different room for more questions. The important unspeakable seemed nervous, but with some help a different unspeakable took Harry back to the graveyard; they'd worked out where it was based on Harry's memories, and a pensieve.

The cistern was right where it had been, and the pebble that was Voldemort was easily recovered.

They wanted to see the house too, and older Harry admired the building's bones, and the furniture in it. The unspeakables collected the potions book Harry and Cedric had set side to make the draught of the living death.

Harry went back to work, trying to find a warehouse, trickling stock out the come and go room to the government warehouse with Dobby and Winky.

-==0==-

Several days later, Daphne was excited and after dinner, showed him some parchment.

Harry had been expecting something about magic, but it was a section from the internal newsletter, listing a large house for sale, as an estate lot. On paper it looked like a solution to both furniture storage, and supply issues. But Harry found something about the description familiar.

"Daphne, read me the description" he asked, and closed his eyes.

As Daphne read the description, three stories, large grounds, he realised where he'd seen it.

"I know that building" said Harry.

"You do?"

"It's the old Riddle mansion. It technically belongs to lord you-know-who." said Harry.

"Well we can buy it" said Daphne.

"So we should" said Harry.

"Could we live there?" she asked.

"It's a sixteen room house overlooking a muggle hamlet" said Harry, "You could live there with two quidditch teams"

-==0==-

A week later

Daphne came home from work looking upset. Harry was surprised because Daphne liked her job and there was no indication that Daphne had any sort of work related problems.

"Harry, can you come here?" she asked nervously.

"What is it?" asked Harry, confused as hell.

"We know what the magic was." she said.

"Oh, and it's evil, right?" said Harry.

"There's something you need to listen to, in the department" she said, mysteriously.

"Something?" asked Harry.

"A prophecy" said Daphne, as if that explained everything.

"A prophecy?" asked Harry, again.

"We collect them, store them and index them" said Daphne.

"And I should listen why?" asked Harry.

"I don't know. It's about you, and some other people and only the people it's about can listen to it" said Daphne.

"Well, I'll owl Sue then" said Harry.

-==0==-

The prophecy was disturbing. And neither can live, while the other survives at the end, had Harry asking Unspeakables questions.

"So I'm not alive?" asked Harry.

"You're alive, Mister Potter" said the Unspeakable's buzzy disguised voice.

"So the prophecy is wrong?" asked Harry.

"When did you vanquish Voldemort, Mr Potter" asked the Unspeakable.

"About a week before my life went to shit" said Harry flippantly.

The unspeakable nodded "So he is vanquished, yet not dead. The last part of the prophecy engages, an your life, Mr Potter, undergoes some improbable circumstances."

"Well being contracted to Voldemort's daughter, Delphini riddle was very odd" said Harry candidly.

"Exceedingly improbable." buzzed the Unspeakable.

"Then you survive that threat and immediately, you are again bound in an even more cast iron contract to the then Miss Greengrass" said the Unspeakable.

"You know about that?" asked Harry.

"It is in Mrs Potter's employee file" said the Unspeakable.

"Figures" said Harry.

"Tell me Mr Potter, do you have a normal life with your wife" asked the Unspeakable.

"That's a very personal question" said Harry, hotly.

"And the answer is very important" buzzed the Unspeakable.

"We don't sleep in the same room, we don't kiss, we just live in the same house." said Harry.

"And you cannot divorce her?" asked the Unspeakable.

"Not with a Black marriage contract, no" said Harry.

"So your situation could be described as that your life is over, Mister Potter" said the Unspeakable.

"Well I may have said that in the past, yes" admitted Harry.

"You might as well be dead, in limbo" said the Unspeakable.

"This is all very depressing ,but I don't see how it's relevant." said Harry.

"We feel it is the work of the prophecy" said one Unspeakable. "Neither can live while the other survives"

"And what do we do now?" asked Harry.

"Well, we think killing Tom Riddle is a good start" said the Unspeakable.

"He won't die I've tried before" said Harry.

"Ah, but we know what he did to stay alive, and despite Headmaster Dumbledore being very uncooperative, we have recovered the artefacts you gave him, and questioned him at length."

"So what are you going to do now?"

"We are going to get some death eaters in Azkaban's life sentences changed to death sentences" said the Unspeakable.

"How will that help?" asked Harry.

"We think you will be pleasantly surprised." replied the Unspeakable.

-==0==-

Harry went back to work. Furniture is good that way. It just is. A table leg is loose… you fix it.

A week later, the Prophet ran a story on the third page about new evidence against three death eaters. Bellatrix LeStrange, Rastaban LeStrange and Rudolphus LeStrange. They had apparently murdered some missing people, and their sentences became death sentences.

The side effect of that was that Sirius inherited Bellatrix's vault.

Stranger still, Sirius got grabbed by the Unspeakables, and returned a day later, and tight-lipped. Though he admitted, the extra gold and treasure was very handy.

The LeStranges' major assets went to a distant family member in America, who'd been ejected from Britain two generation ago.

Harry didn't see why that was so interesting.

-==0==-

The next day, Daphne came home very agitated.

"Harry, you have to come to the department tomorrow, for a… procedure." she said.

"Is it going to hurt?" joked Harry.

"Harry, in all honesty, it probably will" said Daphne, who wasn't eating.

"What's this about" asked Harry.

"The scar on your head Harry, it's a very special kind of curse" she said.

"Don't I know it" said Harry.

"We, that is the Department, think we can treat the curse, and totally cure it" said Daphne.

"Well great" said Harry "Wanna dance"

"I'd like that very much" said Daphne.

She cried as they danced, for an hour.

Harry went to bed, and after crying for the usual hour or so, got to sleep.

In the morning, Daphne looked like hell.

"Have you slept at all?"

"No" she said.

"Do you have to go in today?" he asked

Daphne burst into tears.

-==0==-

A hour later, a confused Harry took his very teary wife to her place of work.

She put on her work robes and was sent off to do something mysterious.

Harry was given a cup of tea, apparently they were still setting up.

He was taken to a room, where he got a splitting headache, as if Voldemort was alive and well.

He could barely see, as an unspeakable man-handled Harry onto a trolley.

Harry, in between the waves of pain, decided that the Unspeakables had sided with Voldemort, and he was being executed. Such a long, drawn out non-life for him.

-==0==-

He was wheeled into a room and when he saw Voldemort, upright, holding wand, he felt such terror.

Voldemort was not moving, which was odd.

Harry's trolley stopped in front of Voldemort's wand. He was panicking, but paralysed.

The trolley tipped up and his head was positioned to exactly in front of Voldemort's wand.

Voldemort's eyes were filmed over, as if he was under the imperious curse. Which made no sense at all.

Voldemort spoke "Avada kedavra" and there was a flash of green.

-==0==-

Harry woke up in a white room, naked.

He wished he had some clothes, and suddenly, there were some folded up.

His wish for treacle tart was unsatisfied. So, this was not heaven, probably hell.

Harry dressed and looked around. There was lots of nothing.

In the distance, Harry heard the distinctive repellent sound of another Voldemort baby.

He strode off, to find a damaged Voldemort baby dying.

Harry gave it a good poke with his finger and it caught fire.

He laid his hands on it and soon it was just ash.

He fainted.

-==0==-

He woke up on a bed in a medical ward. Daphne sat asleep next to him on a chair, looking even worse then before, still in uniform, but with her hood down.

"Daphne" he called.

She woke up and looked at him "You're alive!" she said.

"I take it this procedure was rather risky" said Harry.

"Unbelievably so" she said.

"And you signed me up for it" said Harry.

"Because it could cure you completely and kill Voldemort completely" replied Daphne.

"How?" asked Harry.

"He split his soul into seven pieces, put them in things. The body with the seventh piece can't die, it's tied it the land of the living forever, till the containers are destroyed" said Daphne.

"The book!" exclaimed Harry.

"And the tiara, and the snake, and a ring.. nasty curse on that, and a cup that Bellatrix hid in her vault." said Daphne.

"Seems simple enough" said Harry, wondering where getting killing-cursed by Voldemort fit into all of this.

"And you" said Daphne.

"ME?" asked Harry; who'd clearly lost the thread of the conversation.

"Accident in 1981. He'd split his soul so much it became unstable" said Daphne.

"And what" asked Harry.

"A bit of it got stuck in your scar. Your mother had protected you using some very illegal sacrificial magic,so it couldn't take you over" said Daphne.

"That's a relief" said Harry.

"But it did give you headaches and visions" explained Daphne.

"So I'm cured" asked Harry.

"And the prophecy's complete" said Daphne.

"So what?" asked Harry.

"And neither can live while the other survives" said Daphne, as if that explained something.

"So, My life's messed up by the accident of the contract, So's yours" said Harry.

"Caused by the prophecy" explained Daphne.

"And now it's over, what, the contract will disappear?" asked Harry, curiously.

"No, Harry it won't, but we only have a few more years" explained Daphne.

"So no change then" said Harry.

"Harry, you might have to live with me, and we can't love others, and all that. But at least now you have a chance" said Daphne.

"Thanks love" said Harry.

Daphne looked at him oddly

"It's just an expression" said Harry.

"Well, I've got a day off owing, and you can go home" said Daphne.

"Lets do that Mrs Potter, lets do that" said Harry.

That night Harry cried himself to sleep.

-==0==-

The next morning Harry walked into the kitchen, greeted his wife, who'd either slept better or taken Dreamless sleep potion, and made cup of tea. Harry felt pretty good.

"So fancy going to look at the old Riddle House?" he asked.

She looked up at him tired, red eyed and said "I don't hate you anymore."

Harry shrugged "I haven't for a year. I had people to hate, didn't have the energy to hate you for something you never did"

-==0==-

Mr and Mrs Potter apparated to the graveyard at Little Hangleton, because that's where Harry knew the location, and strolled up the path to look at the house.

"This has muggle repelling charms all over it" said Daphne.

"Probably Voldemort" said Harry nonchalantly.

They looked at the outside of the house, it was falling apart.

The inside was much better, and Harry liked the look of the furniture.

"Rather than sell it off, it could all be restored" said Harry.

"You want to live in a sixteen room manor?" asked Daphne.

"Your parents have nine" Harry pointed out.

Daphne laughed. She had a pretty laugh.

That night they danced, their eyes closed to the music on the Wizarding wireless, and then went to bed.

Harry cried himself to sleep.

All was hell.

-==0==-

The next day, Harry contacted the ministry via floo about the Riddle house.

Delphini had been sent to Azkaban for using unforgivables, and the official said, the liquidation of the estate had encountered a snag, as the goblins had found a distant relative who was alive.

Harry thanked the official for their time and stood up.

He went back to furniture.

About lunch time, an owl dropped a letter on Harry.

'Harry Potter,

The old curiosity shop

Diagon Alley.

Harry Potter,

You are requested to attend a intestate properties meeting

two pm today.

Estate services, Grabbit, Snatchit and Runne,

Lawyers.

Diagon Alley.

'

Harry turned the sign over to closed, Sue would be back later to run the till.

He went to the back room, ate lunch (cold casserole), tidied himself up and went to see the lawyers.

-==0==-

"Mister Potter, so glad to see you here. This meeting is to inform you that your distant cousin, Tom Marvolo Riddle has died, and left no will. As his mothers family has been, er, gone for some time, you are the nearest living relative."

He had a bastard daughter" said Harry, seeing more paperwork in his future.

"She's not able to inherit, due to her legal status as a user of the Unforgiveables." said the Lawyer.

"So once the appropriate forms are signed, you will inherit Tom's estate"

"And what is that?"

"A house, some land, not magical, he inherited it from his muggle father" explained the Lawyer.

"Oh really, well, where do I sign?" asked Harry.

"Here is the form" said the lawyer.

"I just need to take this past my wife. She's got the real business sense" said Harry.

"No hurry Mister Potter, we will be taking some modest fees, on an hourly basis, of course"

Harry smiled "See you later" he said and walked briskly out of the room holding the form.

-==0==-

That night, Daphne arrived, looking tired but happy to eat dinner.

"I was given this from the executor of Tom Riddle's estate" said Harry, sliding it over.

"Apparently I'm the nearest relative not in prison for life." he explained.

"And you didn't sign it?" asked Daphne.

"I wanted you to look it over" said Harry.

Daphne's lips twitched "You can learn?" she asked, jokingly.

"Take it to work if you want, they're going to bill hourly on hours expended" said Harry.

"Grass snakes" said Daphne.

"But cheaper than the ministry, who now can't sell it, because I probably own it" said Harry.

"You checked that today?" asked Daphne.

"Seemed prudent" said Harry.

Daphne's lips twitched again "You really can learn!" she said.

Harry turned on the radio to the music show.

"Harry turn off the radio, I want to talk"

Harry did as he was bid.

"Harry, I know we've got nothing in common" she said.

"Apart from the last three years" said Harry.

"Granted." said Daphne.

"And that my family is different to yours" said Daphne.

"Mmm" said Harry.

"So, why do we get on so badly?" asked Daphne.

"I think we resent each other." said Harry.

"What?" asked Daphne.

"We say, it's the contract, not you, but we're the face of the contract to each other." said Harry.

"You know, you're right" said Daphne.

"Had to happen sometime" said Harry.

Harry pointed to the Radio "Dance?"

"Not tonight" said Daphne.

Harry sighed and sat waiting.

"Harry?" asked Daphne

"Yes?" said Harry.

"Why have we not fallen afoul of the compliance clause in the contract?" asked Daphne.

Harry thought about this 'The clause punishes us if we don't comply with the vows. The vows are

Fidelity Loyalty and Domesticity, right?"

"Yes" said Daphne.

"So are you unfaithful to me?"asked Harry.

"No, of course not"

"Me neither" said Harry.

"So we're complying" said Daphne, "Or are we? Are we just not not complying"

"What" asked Harry, his brain stalled.

"Whats infidelity?" asked Daphne.

"Having sex with someone outside the marriage" said Harry.

"So is not doing that fidelity?" asked Daphne.

"That's a tricky question" said Harry.

Harry got a dictionary from the bookshelf, a gift form Hermione which was mostly used for crossword puzzles.

"Oh. Faithful devotion or submission, unswerving allegiance, conformity, fealty" read Harry.

"Oh indeed Mr Potter." said Daphne, sounding intrigued.

"Just for the sake of an experiment, how about a snog?" asked Harry

"A snog?"

"You do remember how we snogged" said Harry, blushing a little at the memory of that memorable snog in the infirmary.

"For the courting clause" said Daphne.

"One more time." said Harry.

"I think this is a silly idea" said Daphne.

Harry and Daphne got up and embraced loosely

"Who's turn is it?" asked Harry.

"Not yours" said Daphne, and kissed Harry. Treacle tart, beeswax and sweat.

Daphne slid her tongue into Harry's mouth and they osculated.

Harry pulled back "Well that was a bust" he said.

"What were you expecting?" said Daphne, licking her lips and brushing lint of her clothes.

"Some sort of magical pain relief as per how it used to work" said Harry.

"No" said Daphne "Goodnight Harry" 'Damn he was so stupid , you could use his head as timber.'

Harry went to bed and couldn't sleep. He kept thinking about how he wanted to snog his wife's brains out. He sighed and went to the bathroom, and thought of his wife.

He didn't feel any less inclined afterwards.

He went to bed and slept very little.

-==0==-

He woke early and started breakfast.

Daphne came in to the kitchen, her hair damp from the shower.

Harry sat to eat breakfast and stared at his wife. His beautiful, young wife.

"Harry, why are you staring at me" asked Daphne.

"I um, want… nothing" said Harry.

Daphne got up to get toast, leaned over and kissed the top of Harry's head.

Harry ate some toast, drank some tea and got his bag.

Daphne got up and followed him

"What are you doing"

"Today's Saturday, I'll come and work on the books" said Daphne.

They apparated to the shop, unlocked and Daphne sat in the back room, working on the accounts while Harry mended a desk.

Daphne got up "Harry, I just need to check something"

Harry shrugged, and Daphne grabbed his buttocks. "Yup, as hard as they look" she said.

Harry turned around "What the!"

"Look Harry, we're married, I was just wondering, are they really that hard and… well they are" she said.

"That's.. I didn't ask for that" said Harry.

"And you can put up or get your mind broken by the compliance clauses" said Daphne.

"When you say it like that, I hate you, dear" said Harry.

"The feeling is mutual. Though, you do have very hard buns." said Daphne.

"And what's stopping me from grabbing you? You look like, well a very beautiful woman" said Harry.

Daphne laughed "Thanks for the compliment, but touch me and I'll hex you in your sleep" said Daphne.

Harry fixed a broken drawer and a wobbly leg on the current table.

"Harry, you need to kiss my feet" said Daphne.

Harry looked confused, then suddenly felt the compelling urge to kiss Daphne's feet.

"Don't fight it Potter, you'll fry your brain" said Daphne.

Harry knelt and kissed Daphne's feet.

"Why'd I do that" he said, standing up

"Because fidelity means faithful devotion or submission, and Harry, you're my servant from now on"

Harry felt something melting in his brain… not his sanity.. just his will to fight Daphne.

Daphne looked at Harry with a look of sympathy "Harry, I don't have anything against you ,but really, if you'd realised how this contract's compliance clause worked, you could have enslaved me, and that is unacceptable. This way, I don't get forced to do anything I don't want to, and you get to keep your mind; such as it is."

-==0==-

That night, Harry cried himself to sleep.

Daphne's last words to him that night were "And Potter, you can't tell anyone you're my servant."

-==0==-

A year Later

The Riddle house finally cleared probate and Harry took possession.

Within the week the spare rooms were full of furniture, the the muggle warehouse was again empty.

Harry finished cleaning up the kitchen and went to his bedroom.

One he sat down on the bed, he started to cry again.

He lay down, and after an hour or so, of crying, he fell asleep.

-==0==-

Their fifth Anniversary came and Harry and Daphne sat in their large, grand living room, looking at the contract, sitting on a silver salver.

The birth of an heir clause started to glow red.

They cheered as the contract burnt itself to cinders.

Daphne handed Harry a glass of champagne "To you, Harry Potter. You kept your agreement and we exited the contract." said Daphne.

Daphne picked up a glass for herself.

"You enslaved me for two years" said Harry bitterly, staring at the bubbly drink.

"I was just protecting myself. You would have gone mad with lust and enslaved me to be your sex slave" said Daphne. "I just took preemptive measures" she said.

"It was worse than the imperious curse" said Harry hollowly.

"Oh really, and did I make you do anything unpleasant?" asked Daphne.

"Not really" admitted Harry.

"So could I have a foot rub now?" she asked.

"Are we even still married?" said Harry, fingering his wedding band.

"I swear that that killing curse damage your brain" said Daphne. "We Had to marry because of the cursed contract. We are still married. We can get divorced now" she said.

Harry swigged the champagne. "Ergh. A bit bitter" he said.

"Oh you probably wanted a cold butterbeer" said Daphne sarcastically.

"Well, yeah, I like butterbeer" said Harry. "So why do you want a foot rub now?"

"Because you're not compelled to do it" said Daphne.

"And as gratitude or being enslaved, I'll give you a footrub." said Harry.

"No, as gratitude for being married to me, you'll give me a footrub." said Daphne.

"But I never wanted to marry you in the first place" said Harry.

"You were pretty enthusiastic snogging in the infirmary" said Daphne, smiling at the memory.

"You climbed onto me" said Harry, his mind recalling the snog. It had been rather great.

"Because you'd been dumb enough to dance with some skank and nearly kill us both!" said Daphne.

"Goodnight Potter, probably divorce you in the morning" said Daphne and stood up.

-==0==-

Harry went to sleep thinking of all of Daphne's things he would send away with Daphne when she left. The bowl her mother gave her. The vase from her aunt Sophia. The portraits of horses.

-==0==-

That night Daphne came home to find no dinner.

"You didn't make dinner?" asked Daphne.

"Well, where's the divorce papers?" asked Harry.

"I didn't get around to it" said Daphne. "What are we going to eat?" she asked.

"Pub grub down in the village" said Harry.

"We'll have to go muggle" said Daphne. Harry rolled his eyes. "Come on, your jersey and jeans." he said.

Daphne took a very long time to get ready.

-==0==-

Harry and Daphne, in jerseys and jeans went to the Strangled Lark down in Little Hangleton.

Harry noticed that his wife had a more than usually amazing bust.

They opened the door and went in.

The pub was very old, dimly lit and quiet, with a few locals at tables and a group playing darts.

Harry went over to the bartender, a large orange haired man with big mutton-chop whiskers.

"Hello, Harry Potter" said Harry.

"Ted Ainsworth" said the Bartender

"That's my wife Daphne, we bought the old Riddle place" said Harry.

"Oh, been there long?" asked Ted.

"A wee while" said Harry, and Daphne frowned.

"Oh I forgot to cook and we need two dinners, whats good?" asked Harry.

"Shepherds pie" said Ted thoughtfully.

"Well two, and a couple of ciders" said Harry, pulling a wallet out.

"What d'you do" asked Ted.

"I fix old furniture, Daphne works for the government" said Harry.

"Oh ah?"

Harry nodded.

"You're not from round here then?" asked Ted.

"I'm from Surrey" said Harry. Ted nodded

"Daphne's from Hampshire". Daphne folded her arms "Get on with it Harry" she said.

Harry took a glass of cider and handed it to Daphne. She took a sip. "Not terrible"she remarked

"Well Thank you Mrs Potter, from the big house" said Ted, pulling his forelock.

Daphne's eyes narrowed. Harry stepped back from the bar and put an arm around her. He gazed at her 'please don't hex everyone' he thought, closely followed by 'Damn she's stacked.'.

Ted snorted. "Sorry Mrs P. Just joking" he said.

"Get your drink" said Daphne.

Harry walked back to the bar as Daphne headed tablewards.

"You you two've been married few years then"

"Does it show?" said Harry ,taking a pull on his cider

"She's not happy being here, but you hug her to calm her down." said Ted softly. "You're like an old married couple."

"I've known Daphne for… must be over eight years" said Harry.

"Well, I'll being your dinner when it's dished, Mister Potter from the big house. Harry flinched.

Ted's eyes narrowed "So you're from Surrey but people treat you toff and you don't like it. And your wife's a classy one with a big temper. I reckon you're slumming it fixing furniture Mr Potter"

"Antiques." said Harry. "Since before I left school"

"Antique dealer? Well, that explains how you got the big house" said Ted.

"I do alright" said Harry.

"And the little woman more than does her share" said Ted softly.

"Are you a mind reader, Ted?" asked Harry.

"No, just a bartender." said Ted, and started polishing a glass.

Harry took his pint over to the small table where Daphne sat looking at Ted with a hint of a glare.

"He made fun of me" she said.

"He made fun of me too." said Harry. "They've not had anyone at our house in fifty plus years. He's feeling us out"

"Well, on a brighter note, there is a juke box here, and we can have our after dinner dance." said Daphne.

"Is there waltz music?" asked Harry.

"You can… get your groove on I believe you said" said Daphne.

"And you can survive that" asked Harry.

"I've been married to you for five years. I'll cope" said Daphne.

After dinner, they compromised with a slow song.

As usual, they danced, slowly, eyes closed.

Ted and most of the locals watched with interest,well the ones that weren't playing darts.

Harry and Daphne left after the song ended.

-==0==-

A minute after the door shut Ted said loudly "Harry Potter, Mends Antiques, Daphne Potter, works for the government. Ten to one He's old money,no bet she's old money."

"Why's he old money?" asked Janice a woman of indeterminate figure, who did something with administration in the council down in the big town.

"Mrs Potters got a ring you could moor a boat to on her finger." said Ted.

"That Mrs Potter's a fine figure of a woman" said old Jeffry.

Old Evan, who had a beard a sparrow could choke on snorted "See them dancing, them lovebirds do that every night"

"Howd' you know that?"

"I can lipread" said Old Evan. "cos I'm mostly deaf you daft arse" said Old Evan.

"Think we'll see them at the fete?" asked young Bill, a very blond, wet, Anglican young man, who was pants at darts.

"She's a bit high powered government job for that" said Ted.

"A real looker but the temper on her." said Basil, who moved things from place to place.

"Mr P just jumps to hug her." said Ted.

"Holding her back more like it" said Old Evan. "She was going to put you in your place."

-==0==-

Harry and Daphne walked back home and went to their beds.

Harry didn't cry but slept poorly. Visions of Daphne haunted him.

-==0==-

Harry was woken very early by Daphne coming into his room "Oh My Head!" groaned Daphne at what Harry quickly discovered was 4 am.

"For gods sake woman, why'd you wake me!" cried Harry, holding his head, which hurt.

"I need hangover cure" she said, from the doorway to his room.

"So do I" said Harry.

"Well there's none in the cabinet" said Daphne stiffly, holding an empty potion bottle.

"SO I have to go make some" said Harry.

"You're the one with a NEWT on potions" said Daphne.

"I got an A" said Harry, and got out of bed.

"And put on a work robe, you'll ruin your pyjamas" said Daphne.

Harry thought about hexing her, just one of his father's old spells… hang her upside down by one ankle...don't think about that.

Harry lit his wand and opened the locked door to the basement and went down the stairs. Daphne following him with her wand lit.

They went to the locked room with the potions lab in it, and stepped through the second set of muggle-repelling charms.

Harry got the potions textbook down off the shelf and found the right page.

"You haven't memorised the recipe" asked Daphne.

"I'm having difficulty thinking, dear" said Harry.

The potion came out looking a pleasant whitish-blue.

Harry decanted two vials and bottled the rest in the bottle Daphne had brought from the bathroom.

"Bottoms up" said Harry.

Daphne and Harry drank the potion. Within moments, Harry's headache disappeared.

Daphne sighed.

Harry handed Daphne the bottle "Here you go" he said.

Daphne smiled briefly.

Harry evanesco'd the cauldron and tidied the workbench.

Daphne stood there, wand raised, making light.

"Thank you" said Harry.

"We should get a lamp" said Daphne.

"I think the Aurors took it" said Harry. "Or someone since"

Harry lit his wand and they left the basement, locked up behind themselves and traipsed up the stairs to the third floor where the good bedrooms were. Harry looked upwards and watched the frankly gorgeous ass of his wife in a nightgown as she climbed the stairs. He got hard. It's not perving when it's your own wife, he rationalised.

Embarrassingly, Daphne stopped on the landing before his room. He held his wand as far from his body as he could, trying to keep his pyjamas in shade.

"Thank you for the potion Harry" said Daphne "See you in the morning."

Harry watched Daphne turn and walk down the hall to the bathroom.

He entered his room and shut the door.

A quick tap of the lamp and he had some light, and he locked his bedroom door.

He put his holly wand down and opened the sock drawer. There, under some sock in the back corner was a purple bottle. He got out out and uncorked it. He sniffed it. It smelt of nothing. Just chocolate, peppermint and parchment.

He corked the bottle and put it away. Looking down, he'd lost his reaction. Whew.

He got back into bed, took off his glasses and tapped the lamp. Darkness.

-==0==-

Later that morning, get got up and dressed, and went downstairs.

Daphne appeared after breakfast was on the table, long hair still a bit wet. She was wearing a grey skirt and a black and white striped shirt. It was very Daphne.

"Next time we go to the Strangled Lark we're not having the cider" said Harry, to have something to say.

Daphne nodded "Too lethal" she said.

"Here's your toast" said Harry, handing Daphne a toast rack with warm toast.

He poured a mug of earl grey tea, two sugars, added milk "And your tea"

Daphne bit into marmalade toast, drank some tea "Running late" she said.

"Well yeah" said Harry.

Harry ate breakfast, Daphne getting up to put her plate and mug in the sink.

She stopped near Harry "Did you not wash this morning?" she said, sniffing.

"Er, running late" said Harry.

"Honestly you smell of sweat and beeswax and..." Daphne stopped, grabbed her bag and walked very briskly out of the room.

There was a crack as Daphne apparated to work.

Harry wondered about the villagers. 'Fuck it I'm going to need to get a car' he thought. 'Can't confound them forever', they'll wonder how Daphne gets to work.'

-==0==-

Harry went up to the first floor after cleaning up the breakfast dishes. The rooms on this floor held spare stock, and Harry went to the end room and mended the drawer slide on a cabinet. Sue would open up and work the till, and knew to floo over is there was something urgent.

Harry started a casserole, and looked around for meat. Seeing nothing, he went outside, checked for muggles and cast as strong an 'Accio rabbit' as he could. Rabbit casserole tonight for a change.

The day passed, the clock in the hallway ringing, reminding Harry to have some lunch.

After some bread and tea; the casserole looked and smelt like it might be good tonight, the lemon was working with the rabbit., He found himself going to his room and, after locking the door, opening his sock drawer and pulling out the purple bottle, The bottle that smelt of nothing but chocolate, pepper mint and parchment. He uncorked the bottle and sniffed. Citrus, bergamot and lavender. He quickly corked the bottle and stared at it. 'Too much to hope to ever fall in love with his wife now it's all over' thought Harry bitterly, and put the bottle away, so it could not accuse him.

He went to the bathroom, splashed cold water on his face, stared at his red rimed eyes in the mirror, took a deep breath and left for the shop.

Sue, an older witch with a complicated messy past, but who worked for what they paid ran the daily selling part of the shop, greeted him from the counter. "Afternoon Harry" she said.

"Hows the shop" Harry asked.

"Someone asked for parchment, of all things" said Sue, shaking her head.

"How would you use used parchment" said Harry "evanesco doesn't work on it" he said lightly.

"Oh you can scrape it clean if you're careful" said Sue. "We're nearly out of boots"

"We won't have more till we get another estate lot, I think" said Harry.

Harry moved furniture, greeted Dobby and Winky, who popped stock in to fill the spaces that had opened up from selling furniture. They brought four small bales of used parchment.

The day wound to a close, Harry tired from his broken night. He picked up some dessert, to make it up to Daphne for the night before and the cursed cider.

-==0==-

He apparated home, stasis charmed dessert and went and looked at the storerooms again.

"Dobby!" Harry called.

Dobby appeared with a pop "Oh, Great Master Harry Potter Sir, Dobby is so pleased to see you" said Dobby, holding a tea-towel.

"Oh Dobby, are you making dinner?" asked Harry.

"The little ones need regular meals" said Dobby.

'Oh shit. Dobby and Winky have little elves and I never knew. Hermione would gut me with a rusty hook if she knew I didn't know.' thought Harry.

"Oh, Dobby, this isn't urgent, you go back to your family, I just wanted to go see the room of lost things, pull out some things to mend and sell" said Harry.

"Mistress will be needing dinner" said Dobby, shaking his head and popped away. Harry realised he didn't know where Dobby and Winky lived, which was weird, as they were house elves. Maybe at Hogwarts still. 'What had he been doing for the last year.' he thought, then remembered, bitterly.

-==0==-

Daphne arrived home looking tired, but her hair was orderly, not a hair out of place. Harry's lip twitched. She still presented the same highly groomed facade to the world.

"Dinners here when you are" said Harry.

Daphne sank into a chair. "I need a good nights sleep" she said.

Harry dished up dinner.

Daphne ate thoughtfully. "Rabbit casserole, aren't we being fancy". Harry snorted "Accio'd it out of the gardens" he admitted.

When they were finished picking at the casserole, Harry served Daphne the Tiramisu.

"Tiramisu!" she said "That's far too much, I'll only eat a quarter of that".

Harry picked up the plate and split it off, stasis charming the main portion.

Daphne waited, looking slightly amused, till Harry replaced her plate. "There" said Harry.

"Why thank you Harry" said Daphne.

Harry cut himself a slice of Treacle Tart and sat back down.

Daphne eyed the Treacle Tart as if it was toxic.

Harry ate Treacle Tart. Harry reminisced at the taste of Hogwarts, 'ample food, of warm beds, soft sheets.'

Daphne pushed the tiramisu to one side. "I got the papers" she said abruptly.

Harry dropped his spoon.

He pushed the suddenly tasteless Treacle Tart to one side, and waited.

Daphne pulled a scroll out of her bag and handed it over.

Harry summoned a self-inking quill and filled in his name and details.

"I had to go have a shower at work after lunch. I felt so gross after this mornings effort" she said, filling the silence.

Harry finished filling in his section, and he handed the quill and paperwork back to Daphne.

"It still needs to be filed, there's a fee and it takes a few weeks" she said, mouth pursed, filling in her section of the form.

Harry walked to the drawing room, turned on the wireless, and waited.

Daphne arrived, a bit watery eyed.

They held each other gently and danced, their eyes closed.

Harry tried not to cry on Daphne's blouse, she really loved this black and white one with the Gibson sleeves. Her hair smelt faintly of lavender.

They rocked, slowly dancing orbits around the room, Harry keeping an eye out, but their feet knew the room.

After an hour or more Daphne stopped, leaned over and kissed him on the lips.

She tasted of earl grey tea, of the lemon from the casserole.

"Good night Harry." she said softly.

Harry let her go, turned off the wireless and went upstairs.

He closed and locked his bedroom door, 'Bergamot, Citrus and a hint of lavender' he thought.

He cried himself to sleep.

Nox.

AN: I had wondered what would happen if the perennial marriage contract story happened to actual human beings. I'm not sure what would have happened, but maybe this? My version probably has less uxoricide/matricide.

AN2: They had already signed the paperwork by the time Harry worked it out.

AN3: Not advocating arranged marriages.

AN4: Corrections by alix33.