Hotel Omens

AN: Hello there, my dear readers! Now you probably didn't see this type of story coming. You see, this idea came to me while I was reading the Good Omens novel and thought that the crossover between those two universes could work well together. They all contain angels, demons and a lot of comedy. I hope I do it justice.

1 In the Beginning

Life was… well, boring some would say. At least, that was the case with Antony J Crowley (the 'J' doesn't stand for anything, by the way) as he walked through a literally bloody street in one of the cities in Hell.

"Home sweet home," Crowley mumbled annoyingly under his breath. The city looked like both the best parts and the worst parts that were usually in cities meshed together. You can have large neon signs and shopping malls but also filth and wreckage in the same place. The road he was walking on was even covered with cracks

Crowley, formerly known as Crawley but he changed that name since it sounded a bit too squirm-at-your-feet-ish, was a tall man with short black hair, light skin tone, wearing a black suit, pants, shoes and round shades that covered his eyes. And he was also a demon.

He was currently walking through one of the cities of Hell called Pentagram City. Yeah, creativity wasn't one of the strong points in Hell. Some of the sings on the buildings just said things like Bank, Devil's Diner, Dentist or Store.

His shaded eyes looked over the streets as he saw them covered in blood, guts, and gore. He then looked at the clock tower that was located in the middle of the city, a tower which pretty much looked like a demonic version of the Big Ben in England. Just below the clock with the pentagram on it (Originality also wasn't one of Hell's strong sides) was a sign and a countdown meter that said 'Next Cleanse: 364 Days'.

"Ah, so that was yesterday," Crowley spoke out loud. You see, every year there is a… tradition shall we say, where angels come down to Hell to kill some of the residents since there is a huge case of overpopulation down here. And since angels and devils hate each other no angel complained about the job. Well, Crowley knew one angel who complained but he was in the vast minority. Crowley himself didn't care most of the time. Still, such a cleanse always leaves quite a mess since the angels don't bother to clean after themselves. Crowley had to watch not to step on somebody's guts.

Then Crowley felt someone bump into him very roughly, snapping him out of his daze as he saw a man wearing a hoodie run away from him and holding the demon's iPhone in his hands.

"Bye, bye, loser!" the thief shouted mockingly as he waved around the phone.

Crowley glared at the thief as he ran away before smirking. He snapped with his fingers, and suddenly a lamppost broke in half and fell right at the surprised thief who could only look in horror as it hit him right on the back and making him fall on his stomach.

Crowley calmly walked towards the downed thief who tried to get up but only moaned in pain. "My legs. I can't feel my legs!" he said frantically, his spine no doubt damaged from the broken lamppost. Crowley just crouched and grabbed his phone. Examining it and seeing that it was damaged pocketed it before walking away. The thief then turned to him with a look of desperation. "Hey man, you gotta help me! Look, I'm sorry for stealing from you!" he pleaded but the demon just walked away. "Come on, you can't leave me like this!"

"Yeah, not my problem," Crowley said with a dismissive wave, not even turning to look at the man he just paralyzed. Stealing and asking forgiveness only after you can't escape? Yeah, things don't work like that in Hell.

Crowley then took a right turn and found a large group of sinners around a shop which he noticed was a shop for TVs called Radio Hack. Another thing to note about people who get in Hell, they also change their physical form. Some people look mostly normal although they have things like strange skin or eye colors and others take on animal-like traits. This group had a combination of both.

Curious, Crowley walked to see what they were looking at. When he stepped on his toes to get a better view over the crowd he saw that it was Channel 666 News.

"Good afternoon, viewers," said a host who sat at a desk but there was an empty seat behind him. The man wore a grey suit with a red tie and black gloves, but the most noticeable feature was the gas mask he wore. "I'm Tom Trench, and after a certain bitch got what she deserved," he said as some angry muffled noises could be heard in the background as Tom laughed. "I'll be your single host today. And one the news is that it turns out that our princess of Hell, Charlotte Magne has actually been able to open her hotel for the redemption of sinners." An image of Charlotte appeared on the screen, a young woman with long curly blonde hair, black eyes, completely white skin, and rosy cheeks, dressed in a red suit with black pants. She had a happy look on face as she pointed at her hotel building which had a neon sign that said Hazbin Hotel. "But now on some interesting news-"

Crowley moved away from the group, not really interested in anything else on the news. "Well, I'll be damned, she actually pulled it off," he said with a somewhat astonished look on his face. "Though why would she call it 'Hazbin' Hotel? That doesn't sound like her." Shrugging, he just walked away, now with a new direction in mind.

A black car soon parked next to the entrance towards the Hazbin Hotel and Crowley quickly got out of it. He wished he could drive his old Bentley, but there is no way he is going to risk it getting damaged here. He had that car for over a century and he ain't losing it.

Crowley looked over the building's design, having a better view of it than what he saw on TV. The irregular shapes that made the building may have turned some people off of the design but Crowley thought it looked pretty neat.

Walking to the entrance he saw that it was made of wooden double doors that had colored glass on them. He rang the bell and waited.

Some voices could be heard coming from the other side of the door, some sounding soothing, some rough, some enraged, saying things like 'Maybe it's our first guest', 'I don't fucking care', 'Finally something happens'.

Then someone came to the door and Crowley saw the doorknob move before they opened, revealing the princess of Hell herself. The moment she saw who it was she beamed in happiness. "Crowley!" she exclaimed before quickly wrapping the demon in a hug.

"Oof! Hey there, Charlie," Crowley said as he slightly winced from the hug which he returned as he patted her back. Boy, the woman was stronger than she looked. "I see that your idea actually worked."

"Yes, it did!" she said happily as she broke the hug and once again looked up at Crowley. "Oh, I have so much to tell you!"

"Really? So do I. Guess we have quite a few things in common," he said causing Charlie to laugh.

"Well don't just stand there, come in!" Charlie said before motioning him to come in, which he did. Charlie followed quickly and closed the door behind them.

AN: And that is it. This nothing more than the prologue chapter and I'm not sure when I'm going to continue the story, but I wanted to at least put this out there so you can have something to look forward to. I hope to hear your criticisms.

See you next time!