A/N: You have been forewarned that this fic is a little "out there", but for me, it falls into the D&E category because of David's internal dialogue.

Setting: It begins in 2011, while Erica is still being held hostage and ends in late 2011 after her release

No prompt for this one.

sometimes I wish she was you, I guess we never really moved on

She'd turned off all of the lights and lit some candles. He'd promised her a romantic evening because she is feeling neglected. She made it known when she showed up to his hotel room in red lingerie and sprawled on his bed. She refused to leave, insisting that no one saw her and that they had time, until he practically had to kick her out telling her that he had to leave for an important meeting with the board to reinstate his medical license. She drug her feet and sighed dramatically but she agreed to put her clothing back on if they could have a romantic dinner later.

He kept his word. They ate dinner and he even let her talk him into dancing around his hotel room. The night ended with them on the bed. She'd pushed him down on the mattress and captured his lips. In a desperate need for him to be inside of her, she stripped him down to his boxers and put her hands on him. She stroked him through his boxers until she felt that he was hard enough for her liking. And here they are...

She removes him from the confines of his boxers and watches his cock spring free.

"You're so big." She says in disbelief, as she does every time.

Before he can think she is on top of him and his back is against the headboard. She'd requested this position, claiming that it made her most comfortable since she is able to control the pace.

She pushes her panties to the side and sinks down on his cock. She gasps in response to the feeling of him inside of her. He lets her settle for a moment and then bucks his hips, encouraging her to move. She does.

He looks up at her, silently admiring her body, watching it rise and then fall as she impales herself on him. Her face is flushed and her body is surely on fire. She bites her bottom lip in an attempt to remain in control as she slams down against his hips.

She truly is beautiful, he thinks to himself. He reaches up to touch her face. He begins caressing her jawline with his thumb before travelling up to her cheek. Instinctively, his thumb searches for a slight, faded scar that isn't there. He frowns. He needs to feel that scar.

The scar he bandaged and cleaned for weeks. The scar she was so concerned would ruin her beauty, her relationships, and her career. The scar that didn't matter to him. The scar that brought them closer to each other. Instead he felt smooth skin.

It is those moments that remind him; she'll never be her.

He shuts his eyes tightly. He can no longer look at her. It is too painful.

"Oh, David, you feel so wonderful." She tells him.

She even manages to sound like her, too. He needs to distract himself.

He reaches up to unclasp the front of her bra, revealing her breasts to him. He kneads them in his hands, moaning slightly when he takes the soft skin into his mouth.

"You're amazing." She praises, throwing her head back and pushing her chest towards his mouth.

Sometimes he can nearly convince himself that she feels like her but never for too long. Despite there being many similarities between them there were far more differences. He'd never understand how Jackson Montgomery is unable to tell.

He was able to tell from the first moment he made love to her. She didn't cry out his name like she had before. She is more reserved. There is an innocence about her. She hadn't memorized his body; she is unsure of where to put her hands and lips. When they have sex he feels her body change to accommodate him and reminds himself that he can't fuck her with wild abandon. He has to take it slow. It doesn't feel like her body is made for his. She didn't arch her back and lace her fingers through his hair when he surrounded her breast with his mouth. She didn't grip the sheets in anticipation when he kissed a trail up her inner thigh. She wasn't eager when he'd commanded her to get on her knees. It took a few sessions but eventually she worked up the courage and skill to take him all the way in her mouth. He feels like he is starting over again. He is slowly stripping her of her hang ups, and she has plenty.

The sex is different but sometimes, sometimes it is enough. She is enough. Yes, she is enough, he repeats mentally.

He shakes his head, trying to focus on the original purpose of this evening; to remember and forget simultaneously.

He speeds up his pace, intent on bringing them both to orgasm. She moans loudly and he takes that as his cue to continue. He holds her hips still until he feels her body contract around him. She falls forward as she comes, leaning her forehead against his shoulder.

"Good girl," He whispers. A few more thrusts into her and he is there, his body began over his mind. He spills into her with a groan of her name, thinking of her.

"Erica…" He groans into her shoulder.

Her eyes go wide and he realizes his mistake.

She moves off of him and walks over to the bathroom.

"Jane - Jane!" He calls after her but she shuts the bathroom door. Fuck him.

~oOo~

He's sitting on the sofa with his laptop in his lap when he hears someone frantically knocking at the door.

He opens the door to find her standing on the other side. She is desperate for answers. She tries to talk herself out of driving all the way across town to see him, but she can't. She needs to talk to him. She needs to know the truth.

"Why did you do it?" She inquires, her arms crossed against her chest.

His face twists in confusion. "Why did I do what?"

"Why did you sleep with, Jane?"

He inhales a deep breath.