A/N: So this is my first fanfic in years. Had a stroke of inspiration. So took a break from the novel I'm currently working on and wrote this. Hope you enjoy.

Ch. 1: A Purpose

The Third Hokage found Miyuki Shimizu standing in front of a memorial stone outside her parent's home. The look in her violet eyes worried him. They held the look of someone who had given up on life. It hurt him to see that in her. No sixteen year old should have that look. In the three months since her last mission, she'd been balancing precariously on an edge. He hadn't assigned her any missions because of it. There was a very good chance she wouldn't come back alive if he did in her current state of mind. He stood next to her in silence, looking at the names carved into stone with her.

"Do you need something, Lord Hokage?" she asked him after the silence had stretched too long. Her voice was rusty from disuse. "It's a little late for a social visit."

"Yes. I would like to offer you a mission." One he hoped would save two lives. Hers and the boy's.

She looked at him. Her expression still neutral. It took a lot to make Miyuki's face express the emotions within. "Offer?"

"It's optional." He met her gaze. "You are uniquely qualified, but I will be asking a lot from you."

"What is it?" She reached up to tuck some of her sand colored hair that had escaped her braid behind her ears and brushed her bangs out of her eyes. It was definitely time for a haircut. She really should have already gotten one but didn't have the motivation for it at the moment.

"Come with me."

He led her to the hospital. Once he was in front of one of the patient rooms, he stepped aside so she could look. Miyuki peered into the room to see its lone occupant was a small boy of about eight years old with dark hair and eyes. The look in those eyes was very familiar to her. She'd seen it in the mirror for twelve years. The nurses were looking him over but he barely acknowledged them. She turned her eyes to The Hokage in silent question.

"That is Sasuke Uchiha, one of only two now," he explained.

Her eyes widened slightly. "What happened?"

Here the Third hesitated. "It's complicated but it is believed that Itachi Uchiha happened. Sasuke is the only one left alive."

"That makes no sense." Miyuki barely managed not to roll her eyes thinking of the discussion Itachi and she once had about fighting and its purpose. Then she remembered that she might agree with him these days. Old habits die hard. "Itachi was as close to a pacifist as a shinobi could get. He wouldn't slaughter without reason."

"Be that as it may, he seems to be the one who killed them, and the reason is unknown." The Third looked over at the boy. "Sasuke is still just a child. He needs someone to look after him. If we're not careful, he could get lost in his pain and hatred. Like someone else I know did." He returned his gaze to her. "I was hoping you would take on the responsibility."

Her eyes went wide. "What? Me?" She took a step back. "Lord Hokage, I am hardly qualified to take care of myself let alone someone else."

"You are the only one in the village that understands him in every way. You are the one best suited to guide him in his current state of mind."

"But…I am not trustworthy with someone else's life. The last time I was involved with others someone died." She flung her arm out in a gesture to include everyone in the village. "No one out there trusts me with anything anymore. They're right not to. It was only a few months ago that I betrayed this village and my comrades at high cost."

"Yes. And this could be your chance to make amends. To do right by someone else where you failed another." Sarutobi smiled at her as he placed a hand on her shoulder. "As I told you, this is optional. I think you are the best choice for this mission, but the choice is yours."

She swallowed hard then looked at Sasuke. "I…I don't know."

"Well, think about it and when you do, let me know." He left her there.

Miyuki turned her back to the room and walked away. What was Lord Hokage thinking? She couldn't take care of anyone, even herself. And she'd done nothing but hurt anyone who tried to care about her. In fact, she not only burned all her bridges, she lit the match without remorse. At least, she hadn't had any remorse at the time. Not until after the dust had cleared and she'd realized she now had nothing to live for. Her fists clenched as she remembered Sasuke's eyes. He was the same. He had nothing too. She stopped walking in the middle of the village and looked up at the sky. Could she really turn her back on him knowing what choices he would make in life and that she could spare him the regrets she now lived with? Turning she made her way to Lord Hokage's office.

He smiled at her. "Miyuki, did you make up your mind already?"

"I'll do it." Her tone held the reluctance her face didn't betray. "I still think it's insane, but I…I can't just turn away from him knowing what he'll be thinking and feeling."

"I'm so glad. Thank you, Miyuki." His smile told her he had manipulated her without remorse. "It's a weight off my shoulders knowing Sauske is in your very capable hands."

She muttered a bit but didn't contradict him.

"I disagree."

Miyuki stiffened and glared at Lord Danzo. She'd hated him ever since she found out he attempted to kill Kakashi for his sharingan eye. Clenching fists as familiar anger warmed her, she spoke through gritted teeth. "No one asked you."

"You will just encourage Sasuke to be like you. A failure of a shinobi that puts himself above the village."

As she couldn't deny the fact that she had done just that, Miyuki settled on what she could argue. "I will not turn him into me. In fact, I'll do whatever it take to make sure he doesn't follow my steps."

"Danzo, I understand your concern, but the decision is mine to make," Lord Third pointed out sternly. His eyes didn't waiver from Danzo's. "I would hate for another shinobi to lose themselves in the dark after such a tragedy, wouldn't you? Miyuki here is the perfect one to guide Sasuke because she knows everything he's thinking and feeling."

"He'd be better off with me," Danzo snapped out.

"No," was the short and simple answer from the Hokage. Despite that single word, his expression held warning.

Danzo took a step back then sighed. "Fine. But when I'm proven right, don't come crying to me to clean up after you."

Once he stormed out, Miyuki let out a long breath. She still had to work on her anger issues it would seem.

"Now, let's continue working out the details, shall we?" the Hokage asked as he rested his elbows on his desk. After a bit more discussion about the practical aspect of becoming Sasuke's guardian, she made her way back to the hospital.

When she stepped into his room, Sasuke was alone and staring out the window. He looked over at her. She saw the rage burning deep in his eyes. He was already planning his steps down the path of vengeance. The same path she now wished she had stepped off of long ago.

"Having a hard time sleeping, kid?" she asked him.

"I'm fine," he answered a bit sullenly. The medics were probably giving him a hard time for not sleeping.

She walked over to sit at the side of his bed. "The nightmares have come, haven't they?"

He looked away from her.

She looked down at her clasped hands in her lap. "You think you can prepare yourself because you know they'll come. How could they not after what you've lived through? You brace yourself. But it's no use. The moment you close your eyes, there they are. Waiting. Reminding you of all the pain and grief. Like you need the reminder."

Sasuke found himself staring at her with wide eyes. Her eyes held pain and her whole body seemed tense as she spoke.

"After a few tries, you become afraid to close your eyes. In your sleep, your shields against that pain are weak. You are defenseless once again, and that frightens you more than the nightmares." She looked at him. "Eventually, your body gives up and you sleep anyway only for you to wake up on the verge of screams once again. So the battle continues."

He saw the understanding in her gaze. "You have nightmares too."

She nodded. "Yes."

"How do you sleep?"

Miyuki gave a humorless chuckle. "These days, I don't much. However, when I did manage it, sleep came easily only when someone I trusted was nearby. Someone that I believed strong enough to keep the nightmares at bay."

"Are you?"

"For your nightmares, yes." She reached out and brushed his hair away from his face. "I'll keep the monsters away from you, Kid. If you let me anyway."

"How do I know you can? I don't even know you."

"My name is Miyuki Shimizu, and I'm a jonin level shinobi that worked with the Anbu until recently. Does that help?"

"Why don't you work with the Anbu anymore?"

"I…" She looked out the window. "I made a mistake that cost me my comrades' trust."

"A mistake?"

She looked back at him with a reassuring smile. "My skill isn't what's in question. It's my priorities."

He considered the jonin. She wore a light blue shirt with an intricately designed snowflake on the back. Her right sleeve was long and bell shaped, stopping just below her wrist. The left side was nothing but a wide shoulder strap, and she word her headband on that upper arm. The bottom hem of the shirt reached mid-thigh with slits up to her hips to allow freedom of movement. Black pants were tucked into her boots. She had the standard shinobi pouches at her waist and on her right thigh. Her sand colored hair was in a braid that draped over one shoulder. Bangs fell over her forehead a bit haphazardly nearly obscuring her violet eyes. Her name rang a dim bell in his memory. It took a moment but then he placed it. His brother had mentioned her. She was on his Anbu team. His brother had referred to her as ruthless and powerful. From Him, that was high praise.

"You'll stay?"

Nodding, Miyuki tucked him in. "I'm not going anywhere, Kid."

"My name is Sasuke," he informed her on a yawn. "I'm not a kid."

Miyuki didn't bother responding as he drifted into sleep. She moved over to sit in the window and stare at the stars. When he started to whimper in his sleep, she moved back to his side and brushed soothing fingers through his hair and said words a former friend once said to her, "Shhh, it's okay. I won't let them hurt you. Sleep easy."

He settled again, relaxing in his sleep.

She returned to the window sill. Hopefully for Sasuke's sake, Lord Hokage knew what he was doing. Please, she begged silently. Please don't let me mess this kid's life up the way I did my own.

A/N: And that's the first chapter. I'll have the next one up soon. Reviews are welcome.