Notes:

The usual: not mine, not making money out of it. On second thoughts: nothing is mine except Madam Clarett's brief appearance is mine I guess...

Thanks Fey for your help, you are invaluable as always.

Lily paused to take her breath. That last flight of stairs had been exhausting. She never should have agreed to three nights of patrolling in a row, she hadn't even finished her homework for the next day yet. She sighed. She had potions first thing the next morning and the slightest second of inattention could have disastrous consequences. Perhaps she still had some pepper-up potion stashed somewhere in her trunk. At least, the last of this long series of mostly sleepless nights was going to be over in a matter of minutes and she had been waiting for that moment all day.

It had started well enough but Sev had to antagonize the Marauders again before accusing them of attacking him. He had to be looking for them, with the amount of time he tried to take them on one against four: it happened nearly every time he was alone. He really should know better by now.

She shook her head. No matter how many times she told him to let go of his silly grudge, he never listened. All of this for an innocent comment James had made on their first train ride to Hogwarts. Worse, Severus kept lying and trying to make himself into a victim, telling her he wasn't the one at fault and the Marauders somehow always knew when and where he was alone and instigated the altercations. There was no reasoning with him. He was jealous of them, because they were better looking and more popular. Perhaps more intelligent too and she knew how much he hated it when anyone questioned his intelligence. These odious people he called his friends didn't help either, she was certain they were encouraging him to create these petty conflicts. After all, creating trouble and pinning it onto the Gryffindors, especially the Marauders, was something Slytherins did all the time.

She sighed and let her hand trail on the wall beside her as she walked. One more turn and she would be at the Fat Lady's portrait.

Perhaps she would try to make him see reason again tomorrow. Convince him he could try to be nicer. Or cleaner. Or simply stop antagonizing the Marauders. Couldn't he see the position he was putting her in? How he handicapped her in so many of her interactions with her Housemates? The Marauders liked her and she wanted to openly hang out with them but she couldn't because she couldn't ditch Sev since they were childhood friends. But this was a burden. She didn't like the way she had to always to pick his side, out of an old loyalty, without getting any gratefulness back. Yes, she would talk to him the next day, after Potions.

She rounded the corner and spotted two of the people she was thinking of mere seconds before. Surprised, she took a step back out of reflex hid behind the corner before peaking out.

Sirius and James. They were whispering. Sirius seemed excited. They were probably plotting a new prank, she thought with a smile and she took out her wand. If she was right – and she was certain she was – it wouldn't hurt to be prepared to escape it. It wasn't everyday one had an opportunity to know of a Marauder Prank before it took you by surprise.

She smothered a giggle behind her hand, her earlier tiredness alleviating to make way for giddiness: she felt quite Marauder-ish herself tonight.

She chanced another look around the corner: Sirius was gesturing towards the window, his voice an excited but sadly near inaudible whisper. He then pointed at something on a large piece of parchment in James' hands.

She didn't know any noise amplifier spell she could have used that wouldn't betray her position, but she could do something about the paper.

She drew a circle around the object before pointing at the center of her circle and whispered "luppa".

She kept her wand around the corner and her aim on the parchment while the center of the circle she had drawn gained a vapor-like quality, colors swirling until they sharpened into an enlarged version of the scene further down in the corridor.

Lily's hands flew to her mouth to contain her gasp and she flung herself to the wall, hiding completely from the Marauders while her spell dissolved soundlessly.

They were looking at a map. A map of the castle. With everyone inside. She had noticed the interior of a dormitory with everyone inside.

Hands still covering her mouth, she tried to keep her erratic breathing as silent as she could before she took another peak around the corner. They hadn't noticed her. But who cared? They could still know where she was even though she was out of sight. They could see everyone, track down anyone, at all time.

She scrunched her eyes shut and fought not to let the whine building at the back of her throat escape as the memories of all the time she had berated Sev for seeking the Marauders out all screamed for her attention. She had horribly misjudged the situation.

During their first years, he had sometimes had tells that said he had been the one antagonizing them. But for the past two years, he had seemed nothing but earnest in his claims that he was doing his best to avoid them.

One of her hands closed into a fist and she bit on it to prevent any sound from escaping her, her eyes closed so tightly her eyelids were hurting. She had assumed he had just become a better liar, like a good Slytherin. She had thought it was his ego that was the cause of his humiliations and injuries that often necessitated a trip to the infirmary. She had also believed the timings of these fights were too perfect for them to be coincidences. And they had been. But the instigator had been the wrong one.

Severus seeking out a group of four to instigate fights he couldn't possibly win and getting publicly humiliated in return was stupid. This, however, was a whole other level of disturbing. Four popular people were ganging on one person belonging to a House with a bad reputation to turn his life into a nightmare. This was bullying. This was harrassment.

Now that she thought about it, every moment she had with Sev was always interrupted. When she was alone, James was never far. The Marauders didn't just spy on Sev. They spied on everyone.

She allowed herself a few more breaths to recover. When she was certain she wouldn't do anything stupid, she pointed her wand around the corner and cast the magnifier spell again.

Black was pointing at two black shoe prints moving on the map. She looked at the nametag attached. It was Sev.

Her spell nearly broke again when her previous realization just got proven a matter of seconds after having come up with it.

He was moving to the Castle's entrance. What did he want to do outside? Oh if only she had listened when he had tried to tell her something earlier that day. He had seemed both exhausted and excited but she had only thought about her rounds of the night and her need to take a nap before them.

"What?"

The cry broke her train of self-recriminating thoughts and she focused on the two Marauders again.

James was looking horrified.

"But what about Remus?"

"He'll laugh about it too! Snivellus has been snooping around him for too long, he just needs a good scare to make him learn his place. And it wasn't as though I forced him, I just made sure he heard me when I talked about the Willow and tonight."

"Moony could be expelled! Or killed! You could be blamed too!"

Sirius laughed. "He doesn't risk anything. Dumbledore wouldn't let anything happens to us. We're Gryffindors, remember? And I'm the pure blooded Black heir who got sorted into the House of heroes, the one who could redeem the family, show the other kids from Dark families they do not need to be evil. And him? He's just a Slytherin nobody from a disgraced family who wouldn't even be missed by his own house. We'd be making Dumbledore a favor by doing what any good Gryffindor would do and getting rid of that Death Eater scum. It's a perfect solution Prongs, can't you see? If he disappeared, you'd finally get Lily, you say that all the time."

"I don't care about him! Dumbledore would protect us, but not Remus dammit! He's a Werewolf, a Werewolf! Snivellus can't die else Remus would risk the kiss! And if that happens, some people could also blame all of us!"

Lily stumbled backwards, keeping them in her line of sight. She had to get away. She had to warn a teacher, so they could save Sev. Sev who could die tonight. Alas, she didn't turn soon enough and she went further down the corridor than she had intended, right into a suit of armor.

The sword fell from its hands with a deafening clang in the otherwise silent hall and the two Marauders turned towards her.

For a few endless seconds, they all kept still, staring at each other.

Then James took a step towards her, hands raised in a plea.

"Lily" he started to say.

Lily bolted.

She ran, faster than she ever had. No time for teachers, she needed to save her friend. Her friend who had been right since the beginning and whom she hadn't believed. No wonder he was hanging out with that awful crowd if that's what hers had in store for him.

"Lily wait!"

She wasn't used to running. She hadn't practiced any sport ever since she had left her Muggle primary school and the First Year initiation lessons to broomriding had been over and it showed. Her legs began burning barely a few dozen of meters into her run, but the adrenaline helping, she forced herself to keep her pace. She couldn't let them stop her. If she couldn't get more distance between her and the sound of their footsteps, she had to be the first one outside at the very least.

She skidded around a corner too fast and the momentum made her crash against the wall. The second of delay ended up being her saving grace when the deep purple light of a leg-locker curse flashed right where she would have been had she not lost her equilibrium.

Her head snapped towards the Marauders. The spell had come from James' wand. Both were ready to attempt stop her again, their wands aimed straight at her.

Three lines crossing at the middle and a push forward to show the way, she already turning on her heel to run again.

"Glacies venti!"

Surprised cries of pain erupted behind her but didn't waste any time looking back. She knew what had caused them: some of the small ice shards in the miniature blizzard she had created must have hit their marks.

.

Lily came to a stop near a flight of stairs going down. The Marauders would be on her soon. If they weren't already waiting for her elsewhere thanks to their better knowledge of the Castle and its many secret passages.

Think, Lily, think.

There were pounding footsteps behind her and a voice, "she's just around that corner!"

No time to hesitate anymore.

She threw open the door on her left and closed it again behind her.

"Colloportus."

For good measure, she melted the lock too. This should slow them down.

In three steps, she was at the window. She opened it. Her memory hadn't failed her: right in her line of sight, the Whomping Willow stood.

Fists banged on the door behind her and she heard curses when 'alohomora' didn't work.

"Lily! Lily you can't get anywhere from here, come out, we can explain!"

She pushed a table to the window, hauled herself on it so she could open the window she and looked out of hearlier, and she stepped onto the ledge.

She chanced a look below and grasped the sides of the window tighter. Six floors. It was higher than what she had imagined when she had made her split second choice between the classroom and the stairs.

Perhaps she could trust the Marauders?

The door exploded and the Marauders came in the room, wands raised. She tried to read their faces and knew none of them were ready to negotiate with the side. Except right now she had the advantage: she was in a precarious position, anything they could do would put her at risk of falling. They wouldn't try and kill her, or so she hoped.

James lowered his wand and held his other hand towards her, his features morphing in a grimace she supposed was to be interpreted as non-threatening while he took a step towards her. Sirius stayed behind him, his wand still trained on her.

"Listen Lily, you don't need to do this. We can work things out, alright? No need to threaten us like this. We mean you no harm, you know that, right? You know don't want to harm you, I love you."

'I am a Gryffindor,' she thought, eyes alternating between the rapidly approaching James and the ground below. 'We are courageous, sometimes stupidly so. Right? That what Gryffindors were supposed to be… right?'

James came to a stop at the foot of the table. Soon, he'd be able to touch her and he would find a way to stop her. He may claim he loved her, but he hated Sev. And if she had heard right, he would continue tracking down and harassing her friend because he thought Sev was the reason she kept refusing to go out with him. And, yes, earlier in the day, it would have been close the the truth. Not anymore. He and his friends were the problem now.

She gripped her wand tightly and let herself fall.

.

Time sped and slowed at the same time. Fingers tangled with the edge of her skirt and let it go when they couldn't get a grip on it. The warm air of the beginning of summer bit her cheeks and made tears gather in her eyes. She dimly saw the ground rush towards her, a darker area gaining more and more place in her field of vision.

She couldn't afford to miss.

"Aresto momentum!"

Her fall was safely brought to a halt mere centimeters before the ground. She hovered above it for a moment before letting herself drop onto the soft grass.

She stayed in place, limbs too wobbly to withstand her weight as she contemplated how close to the ground she had been when she had cast her spell.

Yet, she had done it. She was alive. And now, she also had a solid headstart on her pursuers.

She raised her head squinted, growing more and more panicked as the urgency of the situation set back in until she saw it: a moving shape at the periphery of her vision, far too close to the Willow.

"Sev stop!" she screamed but all that could leave her lips was a whisper.

She fought against her jellified arms and legs until she managed to get herself on all four and from there, she clambered to her feet.

But no matter how hard she pushed, he was too fast for her.

Heart in her throat, but too tired to keep running, she could only watch him as he cast something at the roots of the tree that made it still. Then bent down and melted into the tree, probably going down a secret passage of some sort it was hiding.

She was going to lose him. He was going to die here, ripped to shreds by a transformed werewolf and she would never have the chance to apologize to him.

Then, an idea: "Lumus solem!"

The blindingly bright light flashed once, twice, thrice, before simmering down to a warm glow that illuminated her.

Sev stilled. His silhouette got out of the hole and took a few hesitant steps before breaking into a run to reach her.

Her friend, whom she had mistrusted, misjudged, turned away when he had tried to call to her for help jogged up to her.

"Lily? What are you doing here?"

"Don't go. Don't go, you'll die", she gasped, still out of breath and dizzy from her earlier efforts and fall. "Inside, there's a- there's a..." Words fled her when another dark shape began to extirp itself from the Whomping Willow. It was far bigger than Sev. She knew for a fact that it was far more dangerous too.

"A Werewolf", she said, her voice morphing into a high pitched whine. Severus grasped her arms tightly, turning to face the same thing she was.

The predator turned in the direction of where the light still came from Lily's wand and a howl rang in the night.

"I don't have any silver on me, and we don't have brooms to get out of its reach," Lily whispered to Severus, as they both slowly stepped backwards, hand in hand.

For each step they took, the Werewolf lazily padded towards them, confident in his ability to get the two harmless looking preys in an open plain.

"Fire drives away wolves, no?"

Lily's stomach sank, and panic filled her, "We can't harm him! It's Remus!"

There was a flash of teeth and an intake of breath.

"Yes, I know you suspected something. You were right, I was wrong. Now, we need a plan to get back to our dorms safely while not becoming murderers."

She stopped dead in her tracks, Severus stumbling at her side.

"Oh no, what if there are other people outside? It's a perfect night for a moonlit date and no one respects curfew anyways. We need to stop him, he can't harm anyone."

"Fire then."

"To scare him away into the Forest?"

"We can't incapacitate him without causing him harm with what we know Lily, we have to go all out or we could die here, or worse, get turned."

The Werewolf had gotten closer. Severus tightened his hold on Lily's hand and started walking backwards again, dragging her with him.

"Okay. You'll do it."

It took many people by surprise that she was uneasy with fire charms and hexes. There was this myth about redheads being naturally gifted with fire magic, but she wasn't. When it came to elemental spells, ice was where she truly shone.

She froze the grounds in a wide arc in front of them until a thick layer of ice formed and reached Remus. No, not Remus. He wasn't Remus at the moment and she couldn't afford to hesitate. He wasn't Remus, he, no, it was a predator out to kill her. They didn't have a choice but to defeat him: he was between them and the gates, and Lily had no knowledge of any secret passage opening in this part of the castle, nor was she strong enough to levitate Severus to the open window she had jumped out of. If only there had been one open on ground level, they were impossible to break into from the outside.

The Not-Remus Werewolf slipped on the surface and fell, and Lily gave the ice an additional sweep of magic to strengthen it so it would resist his clawed feet and keep hampering its efforts.

It rose up and began to close the distance faster than they could back away, they were too slow, going blindly in the dark and not daring to turn their backs on him as they were. She doubted they would have managed to distance him anyways, they were only buying themselves time. It had been a much needed necessity: Lily's limbs had stopped trembling from her near miss with the ground now that fear had given her a much needed energy boost.

When the Wolf coiled back for one last jump to finally reach them, they stopped. Severus stood in front of her. He placed his body sideways, back straight, both arms raised towards the Werewolf. The perfect position to call onto the power of the rune Feoh, to back up the power of whichever fire-based spell he was going to cast.

"Incendium."

A towering wall of fire rose between them and the jumping Werewolf, melting the ice at their feet. The Wolf twisted mid-air to avoid the flames and started pacing on the other side of them.

Severus flicked his wand and the straight ligne morphed into a ring surrounding them, encasing them in blistering heat, before he resumed his previous position. Lily eyed him critically. His arms were already starting to tremble and she knew he wouldn't have the power to sustain the flames for too long. Even if he had the power, it would be too dangerous. Fire had a way of trying to wrestle free of its summoner after a time. And it usually won.

As a result, she had no time to waste: she threw her arms towards the sky and began summoning ice up in the air, high enough that the Werewolf wouldn't notice it, high enough the flames below wouldn't risk increasing the difficulty of creating it too much, and high enough that the quantity she intended to summon would be enough to hopefully knock the Werewolf out cold.

"Get him in front of us."

Severus made no move to show her he had heard her, but the fire became denser at their backs and sides, inciting the Werewolf to come to a stop in front of them, directly under the rapidly growing block of ice.

The heat from the flames made her skin burn and a heavy weight was settling on her outstretched arms as part of the weight of the ice started to become more than what she could support solely with the help of her magic and physical strength until it forced her to her knees.

This plan needed to work. Neither she nor Sev would have the energy for a second attempt.

The Wolf moved into the desired position.

"Now?" Severus asked in a strained voice.

"Not yet. It's not big enough."

The heat was burning her lungs with every breath and she could see Severus' hold on the spell would break soon, but she just needed a few more seconds to make her ice block grow a little more, she was nearly there.

Finally, she opened her mouth to propel the ice down. But before she could get the words out, there was a growl from a dog behind them, and a stag ramming itself into the wolf.

Severus' fire broke free, coming back towards them and he jumped back, tripping over her kneeling form and sending both of them tumbling on the ground. This broke her focus in turn and her large block of ice fell, trapping the stag and the left hind leg of the wolf under it.

What were a dog and a stag doing working in tandem on Hogwarts' grounds?

The Werewolf got its leg from under the ice and turned back towards them, but was stopped when the dog jumped over the two humans sprawled on the ground and charged it.

The dog leaped, bit the Wolf in an ear, and used the momentum to go over the Wolf's head to drag him down with it.

It was a surprisingly intelligent and acrobatic move for a dog, she thought as the Werewolf fell down harshly on its back. It rolled over and growled at the dog, the humans and the stag temporarily forgotten.

While the two canines leaped at each other, Lily and Severus scrambled to their feet and started backing away, though Lily was slower to do so. She eyed the stag laying still under the block of ice speculatively.

Her reflexions were interrupted by a pained howl: the Werewolf had managed to catch the dog by the throat and had flung it far away from the group. It landed with a crunch on the ground and laid still.

The Werewolf turned to the other inanimate prey within reach: the stag.

Severus tugged on Lily's hand in an effort to make her move faster, but instead she dug her feet in the ground.

"We can't leave them," she whispered.

"Why?" Severus whispered back at her. "They're just animals!"

"I think they're animagi."

Lily saw Severus' eyes widen as he too took the time to examine the strange behavior of the two animals and the unlikeliness of their presence.

Determined green met reluctant black.

The green won. Severus sighed and turned to the Werewolf. A loud bang echoed through the air and the rising head of the wolf was met with a trait of fire. The Werewolf recoiled, clawed hands going to its head and Lily couldn't contain a scream of horror. Sev had blinded Remus!

Remus, no, the Werewolf withdrew its hands and Lily felt a measure of relief when she saw that though the fur on his head had been burnt, the eyes themselves remained intact… Which meant the Wolf could still see them and was now focused exclusively on them. With a roar of rage, it advanced towards them.

Severus aimed again, and cast another jet of fire. Except his arm trembled too much and he missed.

The Werewolf got closer. It seemed Severus had managed to make it forget the two inanimate animals. That meant they could start leading it away from them.

She adjusted her grip on Sev's hand and turned to face the other side, ensuring that she would be able to guide him while he casted fire spell after fire spell at the Werewolf to prevent it from coming too close.

"Any idea to escape?"

"We just need to reach the lake," Lily answered, being careful to not make her steps too big so Severus could keep casting and walking backwards at the same time. "It's the closest withdrawal option we have, Werewolves can't swim. If we don't get too far in and keep antagonizing him, it'll keep him distracted from the other two. Unless you have a better idea?"

"A platform we make hover out of its reach and we conjure rocks on him until we knock him out."

"They jump high. And did you see his size? Do you see yourself holding a hovering charm all night? What would we use as a platform anyways? No, we get to the lake, get a frozen platform in the middle, and then we accio the dog and the stag to us. We're not too far, two hundred meters at the most."

"You just said we didn't have enough energy left to hover, but you want us to do all that?"

"We wouldn't be able to get the two animals on our flying platform."

The Werewolf was getting more daring and Severus' aim less precise. It was gaining ground on them.

"You ready?"

Severus gave her a tense nod of the head. "We switch. I lead, you distract."

They broke into a slow paced run, Sev lighting the way in front of them and dragging Lily with him, steadying her when she stumbled.

In the meantime, she kept a steady string of Avis charms going that she propelled into the Werewolf's direction with the help of Oppugno. Some hit home, some didn't.

An idea stuck her and she interrupted her bird summoning.

"Accio ice block" she said.

The block of ice she had previously summoned had melted to a quarter of its original size, but it was enough to stun the Werewolf for a few moments when it slammed into its back.

"Head House Elf Coley!" she called out next.

There was a 'pop' and the small House Elf in charge of the House Elf team assigned to the Gryffindor dormitories appeared by her side, running to keep up with them.

"Students in mortal danger, we need the Headmaster, now!"

The Elf was gone with another popping sound as soon as she finished her sentence and she went back to shooting birds at the Werewolf who had shaken off its disorientation and was running after them again. Avis, Oppugno. Avis, Oppugno. Avis, Oppugno. Again, and again until she wouldn't be able to cast it anymore.

The Werewolf howled and stopped, batting away at the birds erratically. Lily didn't contain her grimace: one of the birds had managed to peck one if his eyes out.

So much for having asked Severus to refrain from permanently hurting Remus.

She turned and joined Severus into a faster paced run towards the leg. When the Not-Remus Werewolf would stop being distracted by the birds, she had no doubt it would come after them with vengeance.

Lily's thoughts became reality far sooner than she would have wanted. The lake was still too far when the heavy 'thumps' of the Werewolf's paws hitting the ground picked up in pace and progressively got closer.

They increased their pace as much as they could. Lily's lungs felt as though they were as hot as the fire that was surrounding them earlier. She tried to force her legs to go faster but it was as though she wasn't advancing anymore. Still, with reserves of energy she had never known she possessed, she kept going.

Fifty meters.

Thirty.

Fifteen.

Her feet were in the water and the Werewolf was on her heels. Too close, too late. She and Sev were knee deep in the water which was slowing them more than the longer limbed Werewolf behind them.

It was nearly within touching distance when a red and gold bird the size of a turkey grabbed Lily's shoulders in its claws and lifted her out of the water. She tightened her hold on Severus' hand. His entire weight was pulling on her arm, and his fingernails were leaving deep crescent in her hand as his second hand rose to grip her wrist. She grabbed his hand with her other hand focused on not letting him slip from her fingers as the bird carried out of their pursuer's reach.

From above, they both saw dark green tendrils of light envelop the Werewolf, creating a cage around him.

The Headmaster was here.

The bird let go of them on the ground near the stag. Sev hit the ground first and they rolled on the ground. Lily laid on her back, too tired to get back up. She rolled on her side. The stag's antlers were broken, the result of her ice block falling onto it. At his side, the nurse's assistant, Miss Pomfrey was drawing intricate patterns with her wand. Lily's eyes widened and her breath caught in her throat when the stag slowly morphed into an unconscious James Potter. He had still followed her. Had tried to intervene. She nearly forgot her previous horror at his actions until his words before he and Sirius had discovered her came back to her mind. They had been trying to save Remus and Sirius himself. Probably their whole group because all of them would have been pulled in by association. They wouldn't care if Sev died unless it put one of them in a difficult situation. Still, he had put his life in danger to intervene and got hurt because of it… And mostly because the dog and the stag had ruined the plan she and Sev had come up with, a snide voice inside her mind added.

The sides of James' head where the antler had been broken looked like they was leaking blood at an alarming rate. It was too dark to see if the ice had done further damage though, and Lily averted her eyes. What was done was done.

In her new line of sight, she saw the nurse, Madam Clarett, bent over where the dog had once been and where a very still Sirius Black now laid.

Lily's heart skipped a beat. He couldn't be dead, right? Wizards were more resistant to physical damage than Muggles. The crack when he had hit the ground had been a loud and definitely unpleasant sound, but surely it wouldn't have given him more than one or two broken bones and a concussion?

Madam Clarett cast a spell that made her hand illuminate Sirius and the weight lifted from Lily's stomach: though his entire throat was red with blood, his chest was moving. With a sigh of relief, she let herself fall on the grass to roll on her back next to a shivering Severus. She felt cold herself, now that the adrenaline was wearing off and the sweat was cooling on her skin. The backlash of using too much magic in a short time was also making itself known, and she huddled close to her friend so they could share each other's warmth.

They had all been very lucky, she reflected as he gathered her in his arms to hold her as tightly as his spasming limbs would allow. Lucky that she had heard the Marauders speaking, lucky not to have flattened herself on Hogwarts' grounds, lucky to have gotten to Severus in time, lucky no-one had been bitten or had died, and that most injuries were only physical damage and could easily be fixed. If she weren't so certain there was none in circulation, she could have sworn there had been some Felix Felicis at play tonight.

Time passed in a blurr, and before she knew it, she was being levitated on a conjured stretcher and brought into the Castle.

.

She fully came back to her senses in the infirmary. Given the ambient light, she would bet on it being the end of the afternoon. A look around her revealed that she was positioned between four other beds. To her right, Sirius, James, and Remus were sleeping and to her left, Sev was resting too. In front of her, there was an inky black wall of magic that isolated all five of them from the rest of the infirmary. She frowned. Were they being hidden?

Speaking of hiding…

Her head snapped back to the sleeping Marauders. Where was this wretched map of theirs?

She threw her covers off and jumped out of the bed, regretting it immediately when stars appeared in front of her eyes, obscuring her vision, and she fell right back onto her bed. When she was certain she could stand, she got up more cautiously than she had the first time and padded soundlessly to the Marauders' side of the room.

She observed them: Sirius had bandages around his throat but beside this, he looked as good as new. James had no sign anymore of the horrifying head injuries he had acquired during the night, there were only the faint traces of fading bruises to show it they had ever been there. Remus though, he had an impressive bandage on his left eye and she grimaced. It seemed not everyone had gotten away without a scratch. She supposed injuries received while he was transformed were more difficult to heal.

A wave of guilt washed over her: she had been the cause of this specific injury.

Still, she didn't let that deter her. He was a Marauder, like all the others. Her only competition in Charms. And that map? It was a terrific piece of charmswork. One she would have been green with jealousy over if its mere existence wasn't so repulsive to her. It as with renewed rage and energy that she started looking for the place where it could have been stored.

Another look at the Marauders told her that just like her, they had been stripped of their outer robes. She would start by those. Clothes were usually folded in a drawer in the bedside table. She went to Sirius' first, given that it was the closest to her. The drawer opened soundlessly, and she took out the outer robe, placing the wand that had been put on top of it back into the drawer.

She spread the robe on the ground at the foot of the bed and began to methodically go through its pockets. She found several pieces of parchment, but all of them too were small to be the map she had seen and a few had scribbles on them. She was feeling the robe for hidden pockets when a whisper interrupted her.

"What are you doing?"

Lily turned her head and met the curious eye of Remus from above James' bed. She fell on her backside with a squeak of surprise and fear combined. Remus reared back as though she had struck him and she clasped her hands on her mouth before scrambling up and taking a step towards where he had rolled into a ball on his bed.

"No, no, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to. I know you weren't in control of yourself last night, I'm sorry, please forgive me, I won't do it again."

Remus sighed without looking at her and waved a dismissive hand. "It's okay, I'm used to it. Everyone reacts like that at first, and not all have seen me during the full moon. I am the one who should apologize, I thought…" his features contorted themselves into a grimace and he buried it in his knees.

"I thought I could trust them," he hissed, tears gathering in his eye, his hands going up to tug at his hair so hard it must be hurting him but Lily didn't dare to try and make him stop. "They said they were my friends, that I could trust them, that in their animagus forms, they could control me when we were outside."

Remus' nails were digging like claws into his scalp, and Lily worked up the courage to sit down beside him on his bed to take his hands away.

"It's okay, listen to me, it'll be alright," she soothed, casting a look around her to check if the noise had woken anyone. Severus had moved but the two Marauders' chests were still rising and falling peacefully.

"Alright? What will be alright? I was stupid," he whisper shouted at her. "I trusted them so much I forgot how much of a danger I was. And them, they made me believe they cared about me, that they saw the human me, not just the Werewolf. I thought they liked me." He began to sob, and Lily drew his head on her shoulders to hug him.

"I loved them all so much, they were my only friends," he clutched her shoulders so hard it hurt, and she smoothed her hands down his back softly in answer.

After a few shuddering breaths, he pursued, "I was just a toy to them. First an excuse to become animagi, then a weapon to use on the other students. A trophy. Their pet Werewolf. I l know it's better than being shunned and hunted down, and I am grateful to them. But deep down, I've always been so afraid that one day, I would become the next "Snivellus", but in worse. He can go to his common room, but I have to live with them."

"I know," Lily whispered, her eyes wide, barely daring to breathe.

"I've made sure I was always useful, always supportive. That's what you do for friends, right? That's also what you do to make sure they don't dislike you and humiliate you and torture you while everyone else is laughing. They can't tell anyone I'm a Werewolf. The Headmaster gave me the opportunity to have a magical education and I completely wasted it, because I trusted them!"

Lily hugged him until the tears abated, drawing symbols on his back and murmuring reassurances in his ears along with apologies for his eye.

After some more crying, his shoulders stopped trembling little by little, until he laid still in her arms.

"I forgive you," he whispered. "Better that than killing or turning anyone. I wouldn't have been able to live with myself otherwise. You could have taken out both of my eyes and I would still have been grateful to you from stopping me from hurting anyone."

Lily hugged him tightly to her until he kindly pushed her off.

"Enough of me. What were you doing with Sirius' clothes?" he asked, pointing his chin in the robe's direction.

Lily flushed, part from the embarrassment of having been caught, part from her returning anger.

"I'm looking for this odious spying map that they have."

There was a rustle of clothes in the room, but she didn't dwell on it when Remus withdrew from her embrace, turning away from her.

"Oh. My map?"

"Your map?" Lily hissed.

Remus backed away, words tumbling from him mouth, "they were leaning to be Animagi for me, the least I could do was to do something for them in return. You and I both know Transfiguration and Defense are James, Sirius, and even Peter's specialities while I'm better at Charms and Runes."

"So you made it so your little group could track Sev and I down at all times?"

"No!" Remus raised his hands in a pacifying gesture. "When I made it, I thought it would just be so we could avoid the teachers better when we went out at night. I didn't realize it could also be used to keep tabs on you or Snape until they started doing it." He sighed. "I suppose you want to destroy it?"

"Yes."

"Sirius doesn't have it. James keeps his cloak and the map on him at all times."

Lily was about to keep pressing for information when a memory came back to her and she hesitated.

"Remus, James does care about you, you know?"

"No he doesn't," came the pained answer.

"Yes he does. I heard him. When he learnt Sirius had tricked Sev into finding you, he was worried about you."

Remus sighed, a hand coming up to rub his closed eyes.

"Perhaps he does, perhaps he does not. Perhaps he does now, but will not in the future." He let himself fall backwards on his bed. "I can't stand this anymore. I keep waiting for the moment when they'll all realize that I'm not worth it. Peter and Sirius have already come to that conclusion a long time ago. Peter is always frightened of me, he's cautious not to let it show but whenever I surprise him, he'll jump and squeak like a frightened rat. And Sirius… Well now I have proof that he never viewed me as a human, just a dangerous toy to play with an discard. They are both my friends only because James likes me. We all are each other's friends because James keeps us together. Or at least that's how they think. For me, they were the first friends I had since I was bitten. I loved them all, I trusted them all, but I don't know if I'll ever be able to do so again." He shivered from head to toe, "Merlin, the full moons. I'll need to be locked up somewhere else. Or just leave."

"You-," Lily cut herself when her voice came out louder than she thought. She let a beat pass and when nothing around them bar a rustle coming from Severus' bed happened, she began again, taking care to keep her voice quiet. "You're not going to leave! What makes you think that, you're staying here with us."

"Why? So I can be broken out and set loose on someone else? Don't you understand Lily? How bad the full moon is? How painful?" his eyes were both beseeching and full of terror as he reached out to hold her hands. "The transformation itself is agonizing, but at least some part of me is here. When the night starts, the pain begins. I can feel my bones and muscles morphing and rearranging, my teeth sharpening, the fur that grows everywhere. And the more the changes progress, the more my consciousness slips away. It doesn't matter how much I fight, there is this amorphous feeling of rage, thirst and hunger that is here and crushes me until my body isn't mine anymore. And then, hours later, the pain begins anew. But it is a good pain, or as good as it can be. Because this time, it is the pain of the beast trying and failing to keep its absolute control over me as my body and my memories are finally given back to me. And it hurts everywhere, it hurts for days afterwards."

He paused to calm his erratic breathing and his rising voice. But strangely enough, no one was moving in the beds next to them.

"But the physical pain is never on par with the pain of having to live the ten hours of those nights again through flashes of memories and realize what I have done. Well, less in summer," he continued with a broken chuckle. "I like summer, the nights are shorter."

Ears buzzing, Lily barely dared to breathe, let alone move as he looked her in the eyes before hunching on himself. She could offer him platitudes right now, tell him she understood. But that would be a lie. She couldn't begin to fathom how his condition must torture him. To think no one made efforts to find something, anything to help him and others like him live with it. And now...

"I can live with that. I know I can. And the Headmaster gave me the opportunity of a lifetime: I could have a magical education, graduate from Hogwarts even, and no one would know. He wouldn't force me to register at the Ministry. He even got me the Shack so I wouldn't be locked into a small room, a cage, like back home." Silent tears started streaming down his cheeks. "And I blew this golden opportunity. I threw it all away and for what?" He dragged his sleeve over his eyes but the tears kept coming. "For a minor reprieve from pain."

There was so much self-loathing in his voice that Lily wanted to inch away and run to avoid drowning in it with him as much as she wanted to comfort him.

"Being able to be outside, to run with them, it helped. It helped a lot. It hurt less afterwards and that beast I transform into was less angry. It also made those nights feel more bearable because I knew I wasn't alone. But I should have realized the risks from the beginning. It wasn't worth it. And now, so long as I am in the same place as them, so long as they know where I am during a full moon, I will never feel safe. It will not matter if I'm locked up so the people around me can be safe, because they could break me out anytime they want and I'll never be able to do a thing about it. Worse, I will not even remember it!"

Remus looked like he was about to throw up at any moment, and to be fair, Lily wasn't far from it herself.

"There isn't any potion to help?"

Lily and Remus' heads snapped towards the direction the sound had come from. Severus. He was awake.

"How long?" Remus choked out.

"Long enough."

He had the decency to look sheepish about his eavesdropping at least. Lily's eyes widened.

"The buzzing sound, that isn't just my ears playing tricks on me, right?"

She should have recognized the tell tale sound of Muffliato right away. Severus got his wand out from under his covers and waved it at her to confirm her guess.

"You're lucky I woke up first, you were both rather loud."

It was true that they hadn't always kept the sound in check. Lily grimaced, then got back to frowning.

"Still, it was a private discussion, you should have told us you were awake."

"There's no potion," Remus interrupted her, looking intently at Sev. "Well, there is something called Wolfsbane. It's supposed to help Werewolves keep their minds. But it's difficult to brew so it's expensive and when my parents were researching it, they found it just works one out of two times at best."

"Do your parents have the recipe?"

"Why?" Remus asked, voice blank, "so you can use me as a test subject?"

"Why not?" Severus' voice was just as devoid of emotion. "You said it's not foolproof, but it's a good beginning. I'm good at potions, everyone knows that. And Hogwarts has huge ingredients stores."

Remus nodded. "I know, we've been down there once or twice. Plenty of rare stuff that Slughorn doesn't monitor as closely as he should."

"Yes. And the greenhouses are full of restricted plants."

Severus got up and walked up to them, sidestepping the robe on the ground in the process. "So what d'you say? You make sure to destroy that map you were both discussing earlier and don't make another one. I don't know, say you've lost your notes over it or something. Or that the Castle's wards have been updated and you can't make it work again. In return, Lils and I will work on improving this Wolfsbane so you can finish your schooling here and get a decent job once Hogwarts is done."

Lily opened her mouth to interrupt but Sev held up his hand to silence her.

"I don't like you Lupin and I know the feeling goes both way. But you're not the worst of them and the challenge is fascinating. So what do you think? Seems like a mutually beneficial agreement to me."

"Excuse me," Lily interjected when he was finally done. The two boys broke their staring contest to look at her. She faltered a little under the scrutiny but quickly regained her footing. "I… I don't like the idea of experimenting on you. It sounds dangerous. But I would appreciate it if this wretched map could vanish from existence. I'd also prefer it if you could finish Hogwarts with us. Last night wasn't your fault. You shouldn't be punished for what he" she pointed at the still sleeping Sirius with her head "did while you were in no position to escape his scheme."

"I would do anything to have some measure of control those nights," he said, the blankness leaking out of his voice to be replaced by exhaustion. "Anything." He looked at them both, "if you can improve the Wolfbane, I'll try as many experiments as you want."

"Then we'll do just that. Lily will make sure we never go too far, right Lils?"

Lily took in Severus' focus, the single minded determination he was capable of glinting in his eyes and telling her he would do his best until he succeeded. She then moved on to Remus, his ever present cloud of exhaustion and despair weighing him down, and the spark of hope that had been ignited.

She nodded. In the dip of her head, she let herself feel the consequences of their plans. When she made her head rise again, she stomped on her fears and let only her resolve to help Remus shine.

"All right."

.

The magical curtain isolating them from the rest of the infirmary rippled, startling them.

Lily dived to bundle Sirius' robe and place it back in his bedside table before imitating Remus and Severus and diving back under her bed covers.

She made it right on time. Barely a second after she had settled down, the curtain let the Headmaster through with a loud suction sound which woke up the last two students still asleep in the room now that Sev wasn't maintaining the Muffliato Charm anymore.

Two other ripples accompanied with the same suction noise later they were joined by Madam Clarett and Miss Pomfrey.

"We're all here and in good health," the Headmaster started cheerily, clapping his hands and waving the nurse and her assistant closer. "Good, good. Let's not waste any time and go right down to business."

He conjured three chairs and once everyone was seated down, he continued.

"As you all know, some unfortunate accident happened last night."

Severus choked next to her and Lily quickly cast a wordless Silencio at him, Sev would open his big mouth and get themselves more punished than they could be, it had happened before. They couldn't afford this today.

A twinkling glance was sent in her direction as the Headmaster went on, seemingly ignorant of what had just happened.

"Now, as I see it, none of you are completely blameless in the events that transpired and could have led to a catastrophe the likes of which Hogwarts had never known. Mister Lupin blatantly disregarded the safety measures that I personally put in place so he could be a student here. Mister Black, through an innocent comment that was eavesdropped, helped free a transformed Mister Lupin on the grounds. Mister Snape opened the tree leading to Mister Lupin and set him free without thinking on the consequences, and Miss Evans didn't trust the faculty to help her until it was almost too late and injured three of her fellow student as a result," he listed in a quiet voice as he levelled at each of them a stare full of disappointment.

Lily could have sworn she heard Remus choke on a sob over the sound of her grinding teeth. That was quite the understatement. And it rewrote more than a little the events of that night.

"Now, I understand some old interhouse rivalries also came into play, but I would ask that you refrain from going over a certain line, for this," his tone grew darker, "is where I draw said line."

Lily gulped. Around her, all of her classmates looked as intimidated by the old man in front of them as she was.

"You are all my students, each and everyone of you. As such, I have taken measures to protect you. Mrs Clarett and Miss Pomfrey have both agreed to keep quiet regarding the events of tonight," he said, waving a hand to point to the two nurses who both looked constipated and quite unhappy with the situation but who didn't say a word of protest. "We have agreed that you have all unfortunately fallen ill. A bad case of Dragon Pox, the one that comes without calling, gets people on bedrest for 24 to 48 eight hours before disappearing, hence why you are all quarantined here. One of the spots unfortunately grew over one of Mister Lupin's eye and got infected so much it wasn't salvageable."

He paused, and the nurses used that time to leave the quarantined area to go back to the infirmary propper.

"However", the Headmaster continued, "that doesn't mean you will not be punished."

A shiver went through Lily and she turned towards Severus before throwing a glance at Remus. Both had become deathly pale and she could guess she didn't fare much better.

"We are trying to keep this matter private and it would be unfair to drag your Houses into this. As such, I will not take points off."

The Headmaster turned to the bed the furthest to her right. "Because I have decided to give Mister Lupin another chance, he will be allowed to continue his education at Hogwarts. However, you will be stripped from his title of Prefect. You will also be moved to another location during the full moons, one that shall be kept from your friends," he finished pointedly. "Beyond this, I do believe that last night and the permanent reminded it gave you will have taught you the meaning of caution."

A hunched over Remus gave the Headmaster a faint nod.

"Good. Mister Potter," the Headmaster said a little more cheerfully, turning to the bed next to Remus'. "You tried to help your friend. While I regret that you did not go to a teacher for help, I understand the urgency of the situation you were in at the time. I do believe your and Mister Black's plan could have worked had it not come into conflict with the plan Miss Evans and Mister Snape had come up with. However, your selfless bravery is something I wish rewarded. As a result, you shall be the new Fifth Year Prefect for Gryffindor."

An inarticulate cry escaped Lily and drowned James' thanks to the Headmaster. He was being rewarded for what happened? Really?

"Miss Evans, I would not be too insurgent in your place. Might I remind you that your actions led to Messers Potter and Lupin's injuries when you trapped them under conjured ice and that it was by your fault alone that Mister Lupin lost the use of his left eye?"

Lily grimaced.

"Exactly. Furthermore, your stunt when your jumped out of a window could have ended in a far more dramatic manner. It also triggered several alarms in the Castle which woke up all four Heads of Houses whom I also had to appease and lie to keep the truth about last night's events a secret. All of this could have easily been avoided since as a prefect you had the means to inform me or any professor of your choosing of the danger Mister Snape was in from the beginning and not when it was almost too late," the harsh voice of the Headmaster became gentler, as though telling her he was doing her a favor. "You actions last night were thoughtless, though I understand you were worried for your friend's life. Because the need of secrecy is prevalent if you wish to avoid Mister Lupin the punishment an unregistered Werewolf attacking four students on Hogwarts' ground the Ministry would see befall him, you shall not be expelled. Instead, you shall only be stripped of your title of Prefect which will go to Miss McLaggen in your stead. You shall also inform her of the change yourself first thing tomorrow morning."

Lily swallowed with difficulty. Of all the people, why did it have to be that Pureblood who could barely stand her? But the Headmaster was right. If this was the price to pay so Remus could keep flying under the radar, then it wasn't too steep.

Professor Dumbledore turned away from her and back to the bed Sirius was in to continue making a tour of the room in the order he had started before she had interrupted him. She herself turned towards Sev. He was incensed, his features contorted in an infuriated grimace as he was shouting what she could read as 'it's not fair! She tried to save my life' on his lips. She realized with a start that he was still under the effect of her silencing charm. She placed an index over her lips and when she got a nod from Severus, she lifted the charm. Sev immediately opened his mouth to protest out loud but she silenced him with a frowning shake of the head which make him close his mouth and simmer in silence.

Meanwhile, the Headmaster had started berating Sirius too… Or had he?

"I had such high hopes for you Mister Black," he was saying. "I would hope this shall be enough of a lesson for you to know not to let slip valuable informations in open spaces. Since you tried your best to remedy the situation by going after Mister Snape when you realized the danger he was going to put himself and others in, I will let it slide just once. But make sure there won't be a second time."

"Yes, Sir," came the appropriately humble answer, though there was no mistaking the victorious smile that threatened to escape Sirius' control and bloom on his face at any moment.

"Still, you shall have to serve detentions twice a week until the beginning of the O.W.L.s. And you shall use that time to reflect on how innocent comments can be misinterpreted and used against you by bystanders."

Professor Dumbledore nodded with finality and turned to face Severus.

"And finally, Mister Snape. The one Slytherin who managed to keep the friendship of a Gryffindor student," he stated with a cool tone.

In front of him, Severus was plastered to the headboard of his bed, eyes wide with fear, his previous anger forgotten.

"You tried to free a fully transformed Werewolf on the grounds because of an ongoing rivalry, at the risk of putting several other students in danger. Furthermore, you did put the three students who came after you to save your life in mortal danger. You should be expelled for this at the very least. But since all of us here are trying to prevent Mister Lupin from getting the Kiss, a measure of leniency also has to be extended towards you."

After Severus murmured a timid "thank you, Sir," the Headmaster started again.

"You shall refrain from sharing what happened last night with anyone bar the people present in this room. If word comes out that you somehow leaked anything to another person, I shall make sure you will get expelled from Hogwarts and that you will not be able to enroll in any other magical school on British soil. Mister Potter shall be allowed to say he was made Prefect as a recompense to him helping save your life last night, and neither you nor Miss Evans shall disabuse anyone of this notion."

"But Lily is the one who saved me!" Severus argued back and lily cringed. She should have known this was coming. "We had a solid plan to escape but then Potter and Black barged in and ruined everything. They're the ones who nearly killed us while we saved them!"

"I will not hear it", the Headmaster's tone had taken a steely quality. "I am being more lenient with you than I ought to be given what nearly happened. You shall accept the terms of your punishment or all of you will suffer the full weight of your mistakes. Think about this, Mister Snape. Do you truly want to be expelled along with Miss Evans and for Mister Lupin to receive the Kiss?"

Sev turned a sickly shade of greenish yellow and shook his head frantically.

"Good, then you shall also serve detentions. You will share Mister Blacks with an additional evening of detentions per week," concluded the Headmaster.

He got up, and gone was the sharp coldness of his previous tone. Instead, he was smiling, every inch the genial grandfatherly figure he projected at all times. "I believe we are all done here."

He turned towards the black curtain of magic and with a few complicated movements of his wand and a murmured incantation, it dissolved under their eyes. Then, the Headmaster left the infirmary without a glance backwards.

.

The weeks passed more or less painlessly. It was as though nothing had happened if you didn't count James' boost in popularity as he kept crowing about how he had been promoted to Prefect because he had heroically saved everyone's life and especially Sev's after a prank Remus and Sirius had engineered had gone wrong and all three of them plus Lily had foolishly ended up into the Forbidden Forest, hence why they had needed James saving them. Unfortunately, that's also how Sev had infected them with an acute case of Dragon Pox that had taken them all down for a little more than a day. Alongside him, a withdrawn Remus was assuring their classmates that no, really, he didn't mind not being a Prefect anymore, that James was more suited for the role than him, especially after what had happened in the 'Forbidden Forest'. She also knew Sev's housemates were making his life difficult because of this story he wasn't able to deny, though she couldn't say she was unhappy that it brought him even closer to her and away from them. She could only hope the the leader of the Marauders would have moved on in time for the beginning of their Sixth Year.

She picked at her breakfast. O.W.L.s were starting today and she hadn't been in the correct headspace to study lately. Moreover, the aftereffects of loosing her Prefect badge, an event nearly unheard of before, had already started appearing. It wasn't just having to watch the smug face of Roslyn McLaggen who never passed a chance to put her down and had made her grovel before her when Lily had given her badge to her. No, it was the change in the way the professors looked at her. Slughorn in particular hadn't invited her to his end of year Slug Club party. While she didn't like the man's collecting habits all that much, they were useful tools to create connections that would have helped her when she graduated. Unfortunately, all those opportunities had now disappeared.

Still, she forced herself to push her scrambled eggs into her mouth. Ready or not, she would have to do her best today.

The usual fluttering sound of owls coming in with the mail announced the end of breakfast and she accelerated the rhythm: get some eggs on the fork, get it to her mouth, chew the eggs, swallow, then repeat. She only stopped when one of the school's owls stopped in front of her, a thick envelope tied to one of its talons.

Lily blinked at it before untying the letter and fishing some bacon in the plates at the center of the table to give to the owl who swallowed it before taking flight, presumably to go back to the owlery.

She scarfed down the rest of her breakfast and left the Great Hall, waving distractedly at her dormmates so they would not follow her out.

She got into the first secluded alcove in the corridors she could find and opened the letter.

Inside, there were the remains of the Marauder's map in the form of several torn ink stained sheets of parchment, along with a recipe titled 'Wolfsbane'.

End notes:

Should you want to, I would love it if you could take some time to tell me what you thought of this story.
Thank you for reading

.

Note of a note: To Amanthya should you read this, or anyone in the same situation.

Thank you for all of your kinds comments over nearly all my stories, I treasure them all. I understand your desire not to log into FFnet. You may know that when I can, I answer the comments left on my fics. It is absolutely no obligation but a suggestion instead: should you appreciate receiving an answer to your lovely comments, may I recommend you check archive of our own? There is a feature there that also allows one to leave comments without being registered, and it has the added bonus of allowing me to answer them all whether the person leaving the comment has an account or not. But as stated before, it is in no way an obligation, just an information. Should you be interested, my pen name there is also Lysore.