Warnings: This story contains profanity and explicit sex (m/m pairing). It's also a/b/o with all the weirdness that goes along with that, so if that's not your cup of tea, too bad. I have four other normal gay romance stories you can read.

This is ... arguably the weirdest thing I have ever written, and I make no apologies for it. It's semi-canon with an a/b/o twist, set during early season 9. It's definitely going to be multiple chapters, but don't ask me how many. I've learned the hard way not to give time estimates for my stories. They have minds of their own.

Happy reading, and if you take the time to leave a review I'll love you forever =)

Chapter One - Heat

"Dude, I get that you're worried about him, but can you please get your scent under control? It reeks in here."

Dean blinked and sniffed the air. Sam had a point. Under the bunker's normal odors of dust and old books was a strong note of distressed alpha. No wonder nervous little omega Kevin had been spending so much time in his room lately. "Sorry," Dean muttered and made an effort both to control his scent and to focus on the lore books spread out on the table in front of him. He didn't really succeed at either.

Three weeks. Three weeks since the angels fell, since Cas called from a gas station in Colorado. By the time Dean got there, the angel (or ex-angel, or whatever the hell he was now) had vanished without a trace. Three weeks of no leads, no calls, not even a damn postcard. And okay, so this wasn't the first time Cas had gone radio silent, but that was then. Then when Cas had his powers. Then when he could heal himself with a thought, take a bullet or a knife to the heart or have a fucking atom bomb dropped on his head and keep on ticking. Now … Now Dean's dreams (when he slept at all) were filled with images of Cas dead in a ditch. It wouldn't even take an angel or a demon or a monster. Any garden variety psycho with a thing for blue eyed boys. For all that he was a badass warrior of heaven, Cas was a little … okay, very naive sometimes.

"Dean!" Sam snapped as the unpleasant smell grew stronger.

Dean knew Sam wasn't really mad. He was just tired and stressed, and Dean's scent was bringing out his own protective alpha instincts, but he didn't know how to make his brother feel better, and it was driving him crazy. Dean knew that, but he was already on edge, and Sam's sharp tone verged dangerously close to alpha voice. Alpha voice might not have the same controlling effect on other alphas as it did on omegas, but it was still annoying and rude, and Dean was growling back before he could stop himself, "It's not that easy to turn it off, Sam! It's not like flipping a switch!"

Sam took a deep, calming breath through his mouth and said, "You're right. I'm sorry." He even tipped his head back a little, baring his throat to Dean.

A little twist of guilt curled in Dean's gut. Sam didn't need this right now. He was still so wiped out from the Trials, and he had to be just as worried about Cas as Dean was. He shouldn't have to walk on eggshells and soothe Dean's ego with ridiculous, outdated posturing. Grow up, Winchester. You did not pop your first knot yesterday, so act like a fucking evolved human being and get yourself under control. Dean opened his mouth to apologize too, but at that moment his phone rang.

He didn't recognize the number so he answered with a wary, "Hello?"

The voice on the other end of the call was female and unfamiliar. "Is this Dean?" she asked.

"Who wants to know?"

"My name is Rose Andrews. I'm a nurse at Saint Magda's Private Clinic in Denver. We have a patient here. James Novak. He gave me this number and asked me to get in touch with someone named Dean. Is that you?"

Cas. Cas was alive.

Sam raised his eyebrows when relief washed through Dean's scent, sweet and clear, but the sour note of worry didn't entirely dissipate.

"Yes, that's me. Is he okay?" Stupid question. He was in a hospital. Of course he wasn't okay. "I mean, what's wrong with him? Why is he there?"

"That ... really isn't something we should discuss over the phone. How soon can you get here?"

Dean did some quick math, factored in traffic and gas stops, and said, "Ten hours, give or take."

"Good. Call me back at this number and I'll get you in. Hurry, please," she added which made Dean's stomach clench and the distress in his scent spike sharply again.

"What's going on?" Sam demanded as soon as Dean hung up. "Is it Cas?"

"Yeah." Dean told him what Nurse Andrews had said.

"I should go with you," was Sam's immediate response as Dean had known it would be. "Just in case it's a trap."

"No. You should stay here and rest up," Dean said firmly. "Besides, do you really think it's a good idea to leave Kevin alone with Crowley?"

Sam had to concede the point, and Dean went to pack.

~o0o~

Dean knew immediately what was wrong with Cas as soon as he pulled into the parking lot of Saint Magda's. The building was windowless, and all the entrances had opaque privacy doors with scent proof seals. This wasn't a hospital. It was a heat clinic.

Nurse Andrews was waiting for him outside the main entrance. She was a tall, willowy beta. Heat clinics were staffed only by betas except for a handful of alpha and omega "companions" who could service the patients if requested.

"You understand this is completely against the rules," Nurse Andrews said, fixing Dean with a calculating stare. "We're only supposed to allow mates and beta relatives inside, but …" She twisted her hands, and Dean knew that if she hadn't been a beta she would have smelled desperate. "I don't know what else to do. He refuses to see a companion. He won't even use the toys we provided. We've given him as many hormone suppressants as we safely can. They're not working. I've never seen such an intense heat. The doctor says if he doesn't get some relief soon, he'll probably die, or at least sustain permanent organ damage."

Dean shifted uncomfortably, his cheeks warming at her blunt assessment. He guessed when you worked in a place like this, you learned to talk about sex toys and prostitutes without blushing. "I, um …" He cleared his throat. "Him and me, we're not … We're just friends."

"Oh." Her face fell. "Well, obviously I'm not asking you to do anything you're not comfortable with, but … Could you just talk to him? Convince him to let us help him? We can't do anything without his permission."

"Are you sure it's safe for me to …"

"I'll give you a nasal spray that will dull your scent receptors, and you'll wear a scent blocking mask for extra protection. As long as you don't stay too long or take off the mask, you'll be fine."

Dean nodded and tried not to analyze too closely why his stomach was still flip flopping with nerves. Yes, maybe he had once hoped that this weirdly intense friendship he and Cas had going could develop into something more, but with everything that had happened in the past few years — Cas dying and coming back, going crazy and getting brainwashed by Naomi — it was a miracle they had even managed to keep their friendship more or less intact. Asking for more felt greedy. Worse, it felt like tempting fate. So he would go in there, and he would talk some sense into Cas like a good friend, and then he would leave the rest to the professionals.

~o0o~

The nasal spray felt cold and tingly, and it made the back of his throat itch. The mask's straps pinched his ears, and the way his breath collected inside it quickly made the lower half of his face feel gross and damp. All in all, he was extremely uncomfortable both physically and emotionally even before Nurse Andrews turned to him outside Cas's door and said gently, "If you change your mind and decide to stay, press the red button just inside the door. No one will disturb you."

Dean just nodded and prayed that the mask was hiding most of his blush.

The room had two doors with a small anteroom between them, double scent proofing. The inner door would only open if the outer door was firmly closed and vice versa, and there was an exhaust fan in the ceiling of the anteroom constantly scrubbing the air clean. Nurse Andrews gave Dean an encouraging smile before she closed the outer door between them, leaving Dean alone. He took a deep breath of sterile, scentless air and opened the second door.

Inside it was more like a mid-range hotel room than a hospital. There was a king size bed, a chaise lounge also big enough for two, and a TV with a few DVDs stacked next to it. A quick glance at the titles confirmed that they were all porn. A table beside the bed held a jug of water, a cup, and a number of other objects that Dean tried not to look at too closely, though he did notice that they were all still in their sterile plastic packaging.

Cas was laying in the middle of the bed, curled into a fetal position, his back to the door. Beads of sweat stood out on his neck, sweat stained the armpits of his gray t-shirt, and … something else was making a large wet blotch on the seat of his sweatpants. His bare feet were twitching, his toes curling up with pain. But the worst part was the low, heartbreaking sobs coming from the fallen angel. Dean had never seen Cas cry though God knew he'd had plenty of good reasons over the years.

Cas didn't react to the sounds of the door opening and closing, so Dean cautiously approached the bed and reached out to touch his shaking shoulder. "Cas?"

Cas twisted around and sat up, his tears ceasing all at once in his shock. "Dean," he said, his voice even rougher than usual. '"You came."

"Course I did," Dean said, perching himself awkwardly on the edge of the bed. Despite his best efforts, his eyes were drawn to Cas's lap.

Cas turned bright red and yanked the blanket over to cover the prominent tent in his sweatpants and the accompanying wet spot. "Sorry," he mumbled.

"It's okay," Dean said, quickly returning his attention to Cas's face. "Not your fault."

They sat in awkward silence for a minute. Dean noticed Cas wincing in pain every few seconds.

"So," Dean finally said when it became clear that Cas wasn't going to initiate a conversation even if they sat here until hell froze over, "you want to tell me why you'd rather suffer than let these nice people help you?"

Cas flushed even darker and pulled his knees up to his chest, burying his red face in his folded arms. "Do you have any idea how humiliating this is?" he said, his voice slightly muffled. "I have endured many indignities since I lost my grace. Sleeping and eating and … urination." He said the last one with utter disgust which, okay, fair enough. "But this is too much. I will not let some stranger fuck me just because this stupid body demands it. I would rather die."

"You will," Dean said evenly. "Die."

"Well, maybe I deserve to." It was said very quietly, but Dean heard every word as clearly as if Cas had shouted it in his face.

"No," he said, his voice cracking a little. "No, Cas. You don't really believe that. You made one mistake."

Cas laughed humorlessly, still refusing to look at Dean. "We both know I've made more than that. This is only my latest screw up. I'm hated, hunted by my own kind, and even if I manage to evade them, even if I survive, this is what I have to look forward to. Year after year of hunger and thirst and cold and this. I don't want it. I don't want it, Dean."

He was crying again, shaking and sobbing out the words. So Dean did the only thing he could. He scooted closer to Cas on the bed and wrapped the fallen angel in his arms. Cas uncurled himself a little, relaxing into the embrace, his sobs muffled in Dean's jacket. Dean rocked him gently and steadfastly ignored the hard thing poking his hip through the blankets.

It took a good ten minutes for Cas to calm down, and Dean kept a wary eye on the clock. The nurse had warned him that the nasal spray was only effective for half an hour, forty minutes at the outside. Then Cas's pheromones would start to affect Dean. The mask might or might not neutralize the worst of it. Those things were only guaranteed about seventy percent effective, and Cas's heat was abnormally intense, probably a side effect of his angel mojo blocking the natural cycle for so long (although of course the doctors didn't know about that, so they were chalking it up to a hormone imbalance which was a fancy way of saying "we got nothing").

"Cas," Dean said when it seemed like Cas was paying attention again, "I know it's hard to see it right now, but being human has its up sides, and sex? Sex is definitely one of the perks. Plus, the people here are professionals. They'll know how to make it good for you. They won't hurt you."

Cas abruptly pulled away from Dean, balling himself up again, his expression closed off. "That's not what I'm afraid of."

"Then what? Is it the whole prostitution aspect of it? You think God would disapprove?"

"No," Cas said flatly. "I don't much care what God thinks anymore. I just don't want …" He sighed, his shoulders slumping in defeat. "I don't want professionalism, Dean. I don't want the first person who touches me that way to be just doing their job. I want someone who knows me, who cares about me, who …" His voice dropped to a whisper. "Who loves me." A few more tears trickled silently down his cheeks. "And now the opportunity to find that has been stolen from me, and my only choices are to give my first time to a stranger or to die. It's unfair, but it is still my choice. My free will." He smiled sadly through his tears and reached out to caress Dean's cheek, but the mask was in the way, so he ended up touching Dean's temple like some strange attempt at a Vulcan mind meld. "I'm glad I got to see you again," he said. "One last time."

Dean stared into those sad blue eyes and remembered the first time he had seen them, remembered a voice like a roll of thunder but somehow gentle at the same time saying, What's the matter, Dean? You don't think you deserve to be saved? He remembered a hopeless night in a motel parking lot when he had prayed for the first time in his life, and it wasn't God who answered. It was Cas. Always Cas. And yes, he had betrayed Dean too, hurt him, and let him down, but he always came back, always tried to fix it. He took risks and made sacrifices for Dean, and he made mistakes and screwed up again and again, and through it all Dean loved him. Even when he was fucking furious at him, neck deep in Leviathans and watching Sam go off the rails and all of it Cas's fault, Dean had still loved him and wanted him to come back so there would at least be the possibility of them getting past all that shit and being … being them again. Whatever the hell they were.

He reached up and pulled off the mask.

Cas frowned. "Dean, what are you —"

Dean silenced him with a kiss. It was brief. He didn't dare risk more than a soft press of closed lips because Cas was already highly aroused, and the nasal spray was starting to wear off, and they both needed to remain somewhat clear headed for the time it would take to verify that this was mutual. "I know you," Dean murmured, pressing his forehead against Cas's, the scent of fertile omega starting to tickle his nose and perk up his dick. "I care about you. I …" The unfamiliar words got stuck in his throat, so he compromised with the next best thing. "I need you, Cas. I need you to live. I cannot lose another member of my family. I can't."

"Dean." It wasn't the beginning of a protest or anything else. It was a statement unto itself, a prayer and the answer to a prayer.

They kissed again though it was hard to say who initiated it. Cas's fingers scraped at Dean's scalp, and he moaned low in his throat, but it ended on a whimper. He was already burning with desire and had been for days. At this point foreplay was irrelevant and would only prolong his pain.

"Hold that thought," Dean said, and he climbed off the bed and almost ran across the room to press the red button. When he turned back around, Cas had already shed his sweat soaked shirt and was struggling out of his pants, no trace of shyness. While Dean hurried to catch up, the omega flipped ungracefully onto his stomach, exposing his wet, dilated entrance to Dean. Dean swallowed, his cock throbbing in his jeans.

The room smelled strongly of musk now, Dean's arousal bleeding into his scent which made Cas's body put off even more fuck me pheromones as it finally sensed a willing alpha nearby. Cas's hips rolled and jerked mindlessly against the mattress, but that wasn't going to do anything for the crippling cramps that Dean knew must be like knives tearing at his insides. Dean had never helped an omega through heat before, but he knew the basics. Only knotting could take away the pain entirely although other kinds of stimulation could take the edge off for a few minutes at a time.

Dean finished undressing and was relieved to discover that he was already fully hard, whether from the scent, or the sight of Cas spread out and ready for him, or most likely the combination of the two. He found a package of condoms among the toys on the bedside table and rolled one on. Cas's body chemistry was probably too unstable right now for him to get pregnant, but no sense in taking chances.

When Dean rested his hands on Cas's hips and bent to scent his neck, Cas gave a shaky sigh and whimpered, "Dean. Please."

"It's all right, omega," Dean murmured. "I got you." He entered Cas in one smooth thrust, making sure to tag his prostate on the way in and give him a jolt of pleasure to distract from the pain.

Cas groaned, his back arching up against Dean's stomach, and Dean took the opportunity to slip a hand underneath him and stroke his cock. It might take a while to get him knotted, but Dean would be damned if Cas wasn't gonna enjoy this as much as possible in the meantime. He might not be a professional, but Dean had had a lot of sex in his life, and he would use every trick he'd ever learned to make Cas's first time what it should be.

Actually, this might not take as long as he'd thought. He'd never been with an omega in heat before, and he'd underestimated how quickly the scent alone could push him over the edge. Not to mention the tight, slick channel seizing at him on every thrust, trying to hold him inside, and the incoherent moans spilling from Cas's mouth, punctuated with cries of "Alpha" and "Dean". It felt like less than five minutes had passed when his knot started to swell, stretching Cas a little wider every time Dean pulled out. This drove Cas absolutely fucking nuts. He bucked and heaved up against Dean, gasping, "Please. Yes. Oh, fuck yes. Please, Dean. Alpha, please."

Dean slid in one last time and let himself go, his vision whiting out as his orgasm overtook him. He was only vaguely aware of Cas spilling over his hand, but he was acutely aware of the way Cas's body locked tight around his knot because it wrenched an immediate second climax from him, so intense that he actually screamed, and it took all his self control not to bite down on Cas's neck. He had a feeling Cas wouldn't appreciate being randomly mated while he was too heat drunk to have an informed say in the matter.

When he had regained a little muscle control, Dean carefully rolled them both onto their sides, keeping Cas pressed tight against his chest so the movement wouldn't cause too much discomfort where they were still joined. He nuzzled Cas's neck and scented only happy, satisfied omega, no undertone of pain or distress. His inner alpha purred smugly.

"Good," Cas sighed, already half asleep. "Good alpha. Feel so much better."

"Glad to hear it," Dean said, laying a light kiss behind his ear. "Sleep now, omega." He couldn't resist adding with a smirk, "I'll watch over you."

Cas either didn't hear or didn't bother to answer, and seconds later he was snoring softly.

Dean was pretty exhausted too, but he forced himself to stay awake until his knot went down, and then he very carefully pulled out of Cas. The omega whimpered a little but didn't wake up. Dean tied off the condom and tossed it in the trash, then padded to the adjoining bathroom where he found a pack of wet wipes already laid out on the counter. There was also gauze, disinfectant, muscle rub, massage oil, scented bubble bath, and a bathtub and shower both big enough for two. Dean started to wonder how expensive this place was and how they were going to get away with not paying the bill, but they had several more days before they had to worry about that. Speaking of which …

After he'd cleaned up himself and Cas, he dug his phone out of his jeans and sent Sam a text. Cas gonna b ok but can't travel 4 a few days. Keep u updated. He put the phone on silent in case Sam called to demand more details (that was not a conversation he was ready to have with anyone, let alone his brother) and crawled back into bed beside Cas. Cas rolled over and nuzzled Dean's neck, scenting him instinctively without waking. Dean smiled and wrapped his arms around the fallen angel. He fell asleep quickly and had no bad dreams.