-A/N: Yay! I finally finished the final chapter to "Heartbreaker". I never did expect that it would be extended past the first part. Anyways, it is, and I honestly had no idea how this fic was going to end until I sat down and started writing it. I balanced between both possible conclusions; a Kurtty ending or an ending where both are left heartbroken. I kept leaning from one to the other. But now it's been decided. What did Kurt choose? Read to find out! ^_~
-Special Thanx to:
Memai- I think she's the most recent reviewer. Anyways, thanx for your lovely comment and you are so right that the best stories are those that aren't predictable. Hopefully this ending will please you.
Neko-chan- Thanx for pointing out my writing technique. I originally wanted to make this fic Journal style, where each chapter would be a page from Kitty's diary. That's why it's unusually told from her POV.
Iron Raven- Yet more great comments. I like how you're perceiving the Elf. I had roughly the same idea within my mind when I debated on how Kitty should go about trying to get Kurt to accept her. Two great minds think alike ^_~
StevDown- I'm so sorry! I didn't get a chance to do a part in Kurt's POV! I know that it would make for an interesting change but I just felt the need to stick to Kitty. I hope you don't mind.
Sprocket- Heehee, you really had me freaked out. When the first word you mentioned was "Horrible", I started thinking "Oh no! I guess my fic does totally suck." But your comments on Kitty changing her mind got me considering a continuation even more. Thanx!
I would also like to thank the following people for all their wonderful reviews: Koneko Tenshi, Klutz, Shadowkitten, Erin, raniatlw, Fraulisa, Nacoutte, RedLion, Mish, LewsTherinInsanity, Iceangel, JDH3, Cassandra, Luka, and Xlade. Thank ya'll for reading my fic!
-Disclaimer: I don't own Kurt or Kitty or any of the Xmen: Evo characters.
-Heartbreaker
-By Selene Tsukino
His pale-eyes glowed in the darkness, staring deep into my own. At first, through the glare of the moon shining through his window, I noticed the relief and relaxed smile that remained plastered across his face. But as soon as that had appeared, it disappeared as his pained eyes looked away and his smile became nothing more than a simple frown. Without another thought, he rolled onto his side, as if willing me to be an illusion.
"Kurt?"
No response.
I felt my mouth go dry. I needed to tell him. I needed to end this silly silent feud. I needed to be with someone whose love I could return.
I needed him.
"Kurt?"
I reached out and gently touched his shoulder. I expected him to push me away or to say something ~anything~ but…he remained silent.
"I-I'm sorry," I whispered.
He remained still.
"You-you were right, Kurt," I started again, feeling my voice on the verge of cracking. "There is something between us, something that I've, like, refused to consider."
My voice sounded like a gentle squeak, filled with much emotion and pain. I felt like a child, too afraid to reach out to what she wanted, too afraid to take on something that meant everything to her. I felt afraid…with my heart left in the hands of my best friend who could as easily reject me as I'd done to him…
"Ever since you, like, told me those three words with your silly German accent…ever since even before you admitted to anything, when you held me in your arms and let me cry because Lance had been dating some ditzy blond…"
I felt my heart thumping wildly, a few tears slide down my cheek. I held my breath for a moment, slowly inhaling and exhaling, keeping control over my emotional state. I had to let this out.
"Ever since Rogue hurt you when we were trying to help her…ever since I've realized the person beneath that blue fur, I've known my feelings for you went, like, beyond a simple friendship."
He suddenly sat up in his bed, turning to face me as I found the courage to finish what I had to say. I saw the desperation in his eyes…the silent plea that begged for me to finish…
I sat down beside him on his bed, holding both of his three-fingered hands within my own. My blue eyes were clouded over with my tears and I sniffled nervously, holding back the sobs within me.
"I'm tired of running," I simply stated. "All I've been doing is, like, running. I've been afraid of believing in what we have. I've been too afraid of what I feel, which is why I went to Lance. I thought I did, like, love him. But it was only my lustful desire to be perfect, to have a perfect boyfriend and a perfect life. But I could never be perfect…"
I saw his pointed ears twitch, his tail hanging tensely within the air. He opened his mouth but I slowly shook my head, silently asking him to remain silent as I finished my confession.
"…because…there is no such thing as perfect. Nothing in this world is, like, ever totally perfect. So I'm tired of trying to be what I can never be, especially when it isn't what my heart wants. And what my heart wants is…you, Kurt."
He stared at me, looking as if he were afraid to believe that this was actually happening.
"Ich liebe dich," I said, trying not to cringe at my horrible German accent.
Kurt's eyes went wide with shock. I knew that if I wasn't struggling to not sob, if this wasn't my ultimate confession, I probably would have fallen off his bed laughing hysterically. The look on his face was absolutely priceless!
"I realize the mistake I made and I want to make things better," I confessed. "So please…give me a chance."
I didn't know what to expect next. Everything was out there…no more denying, no more regretting…all that was left was to either heal a broken heart or receive one in return.
I waited for his response. He looked deep in thought, probably determining what should happen next. For a few moments, nothing was said through the tense silence. And as each second went by, my heart slowly plummeted to the pit of my stomach as I began to fear the worst.
"Katzchen…"
And then he kissed me. The moment I felt his lips touch mine, and that burning sensation that enflamed my body, I felt myself melt away into a different world…where there was only him and I.
I felt my trembling body relax in his arms, deepening our hesitant kiss as our passionate desires took over. Never in my life had I felt so much love…so much passion…so much hope that everything was going to be all right. Kurt made me feel safe and secure, wrapping his arms tightly around me. I realized later that I held onto him just as tight, fearing that the moment I let go, he would no longer be mine.
Maybe it wasn't just a silly fear. Maybe it was actual instinct that sent me a warning signal moments before it actually happened. Or maybe it was just cruel destiny. But the moment I felt him push away…I knew. This was it.
He looked at me with a pained expression, his hands trembling at his side. In his crouched position, he suddenly looked weak and afraid. But his determination kicked in and after a moment, he looked at me with sudden seriousness.
"I'm sorry, Katzchen," he whispered sadly.
I reached out and took hold of his hand, gently stroking it as I felt my heart break. I wanted to say something but my mouth was too dry to un-cluster the words I held at the back of my throat.
He slowly pulled his hand from my grasp.
"You hurt me, in a vay no one else has. You broke mein heart vhen you vent to Lance. And it hurt me more than anything. You gave up on vhat ve had before anything could start. Right now is not the time for this, Katzchen," he said. "I am not ready to forgive you."
I wanted to scream at him. I wanted to tell him not to give up on us, to forgive me and let life continue its torturous flow. But I couldn't. All I could do was respect what he said and accept it for what it was.
I didn't stop the tears from flowing. I didn't stop the pain that coursed throughout my body. I didn't do anything…except allow this horrible mess to end the way it had started, at the cost of broken hearts.
"Good night, Elf."
And I forced a smile, oblivious to how strange it would have looked on my tear-stained face.
He smiled back, although the hint of a few tears haunted his yellow eyes.
"Gute nacht, Katzchen."
For the final time, I walked away. It seemed like I had spent most of that love-triangle always walking away (sometimes running)…and in the end, the result was always the same; hearts were broken, friendships were in need of being rebuilt, and no one ever did get what they want.
I wish I could look back at this event and smile. But I can't. It took many months for Kurt and I to regain that friendship we once had, but even then, nothing remained the same. There were still sore wounds left from the bitter ending.
Both of us are constantly watching out for each other, like two guardian angels, although always at arm's length. It was tough watching him and Amanda get back together. Whenever I saw him put his arm around her, laugh along with her jokes, and give her his dazzling elfish grin…I felt as if my heart was being squeezed by the hand of fate and I asked myself "Why can't that be me?"
-The End-By Selene Tsukino
-A/N: Sorry if any of you are disappointed with the ending. But I decided to stick with the angsty ending, seeing as it would be more suited for this fic's title. If you get a chance to, please review and complain about the ending, if you want to. Thanx for all the awesome reviews! It's what kept me going. And, just to let everyone know, there most likely will not be a sequel or another chapter. Sorry for the inconvenience.