Title: Kiss Me, Darling, One More Time

Summary: Maybe they will never have a last kiss. Just endless series of first ones.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything

Fiveya week 2019 Prompt: First Kiss / Last Kiss

Number Five rarely thought about his first kiss. He was maybe four or five years old. He didn't remember the specifics but he remember it was Seven who leaned toward him and pecked him on the corner of his lips smiling at him afterwards. He didn't remember the context of why she kissed him but as far as his memories allowed him to go that was his absolute first kiss.

The second one was a different story. He remembered it pretty clearly as Seven came up to him one time when they were about eleven years old telling she had a little research project she was interesting in working on, and asked if Five would be so kind to help her out. Who was he to deny his favourite person in the house? Not to mention he was curious about what project Seven had in mind.

She rather cleverly lured him to the back of the library where no one could see them, not even dad's cameras given the right angle. Five honestly thought it was still all a part of the researched even as Seven put her hands on his shoulders and took a step closer her face only two inches away from his before she pressed her warm lips against his own.

'Oh,' was all he could let out after she leaned away to see his reaction.

This kind of research.

Her eyebrows were raised up and her brown bambi eyes were wide with anticipation of what he would say next. Honestly, Five didn't know what to say. The kiss was...quick and since he didn't think about it in advance, he had little to contribute to her little research.

Still he told her it was nice and that her lips tasted like the cherries from Mom's pie. Given that Seven beamed at him and skipped away afterward, he supposed it wasn't the worst reaction.

Since then it became a thing. The corner in the library became their special hiding space where they often ended up in if they wanted a few minutes alone and to explore the whole kissing thing.

One and Three were almost annoyingly bad at sneaking around always getting caught and ending up punished but Seven and him were sneaking little things. Since his ability allowed him to get there before anyone would even notice, and Seven was often overlooked it was a game of sort of for them to end up in the library in their special place and giggle softly at how no one had a clue before they calmed their laughs down and kissed again.

Kissing was fun.

Maybe at the beginning Five found it a bit strange the whole pressing one lips against another. Sure Seven's lips were soft and he didn't mind the taste of cherries or whatever pie they had for desert, but in overall there was little appeal for Five. It was nice, and interesting for research to take notes on how his heart speeded up or face had gone warm or how Seven reacted to all of it, but apart from that he didn't think much of it. He didn't want to kiss anyone else don't get him wrong and he certainly wouldn't approve of anyone else daring to kiss Seven. But he didn't truly comprehend the fuss. It wasn't until they were about twelve that it started to feel different.

Before it would be about the thrill of the game to get into the library unnoticed and laugh at how everyone was clueless. The kissing was just the side bonus. But as time went by especially once he started to experiment with angles and tongues...oh tongues were definitely an improvement, Five started to take pleasure in the actual act of kissing than what lead them to the library.

They became more eager almost addictive to the experience always counting seconds, minutes, moments until they could do it again.

They would be studying in the library in plain sight when Five would look over at Seven. She would bit her lip in an almost a challenge for him to go and kiss it afterwards and he would pull her skirt under the table giving her to signal for them to go to their little place.

Once there Five would grab her shoulders or arms or neck whichever felt right in the rushed moment and pressed his mouth against her own in an open mouthed kiss his tongue immediately asking hers for a dance. By then long were gone the little childish pecks from their beginnings now they wanted more and more and they were both very eager to give and take what they could. Apart from adding tongues and exploring each other's mouths with them, they also tried to see how long they could kiss one another before they needed air. Both of them trying to hold on for as long as possible until one always gave in and broke the kiss both panting desperate for air like they just ran, but at the same time already counting how much more air did they need before they could kiss again.

At times he wondered if they really were that good in hiding it or if the rest of their family were just that ignored because by the time they were thirteen and the rest of his siblings got names, Five wanted to kiss Vanya anywhere and anytime often just taking her hand or pressing himself close to her just to have a bit of her. They even occasionally shared a very quick kiss outside of the library in the hallways or each other's room. He knew it was careless and dad could have seen it on the cameras but he didn't care, he just couldn't help himself anymore. He was addicted to her and her kisses, starving whenever he couldn't get any.

It went on and for a while Five genuinely and naively believed this was how it would always be. The two of them sneaking around kissing one another while their family remained oblivious or ignorant. He would be fine with that. In fact he would be more than happy for it to stay like that, but it didn't. No, it really didn't.

Five pulled Vanya away from the others into the darkness of the hallways. They didn't have much time as they would have lunch soon, but Five had an urge to kiss her again and he needed to satisfy it or he would be an annoying asshole if he didn't. Well, more annoying than he usually was. Sometimes he wondered if that wasn't the only reason why Vanya allowed them to kiss her. Maybe she just didn't want the house having to suffer through his bad mood.

He squeezed her hand a bit tighter knowing he wouldn't hurt her as he told her, 'I'm going to convince dad today.'

Her smile fell a bit but she didn't say anything.

'This time he will listen to me and agree. I know it. I can feel it,' he said for some reason he wanted to convince her just as much as dad. She was all for his time travelling until dad brought that horrible thought into her mind that he could get stuck. As if. Did he honestly not know him at all? Did he really think Five would be that stupid and careless to get stuck away from Vanya? He clearly did not know him at all.

Vanya didn't say anything. She knew him better to try and change his mind or argue with him.

Instead she licked her pretty red lips before she leaned forward and kissed him. The kiss was a bit different today. He could feel she was tenser, but he brushed her hair slowly and carefully while he tilted her head to the side deepening the kiss and making her sigh and relax. He knew what worked on her. Their kiss was perfect like always. Their mouths worked good against each other and their tongues knew what to do to make Five's heart speed up and something in his stomach flip wanting more. Always wanting more.

They didn't have enough time so they had to cut the kiss short, but once they did Vanya's kept her hand in his and the other on his arm keeping him close.

'What's the matter?' he asked her, but she stayed quiet for a while before she leaned toward him again and kissed him. This one was different than the rest, it was delicate and somehow needy all the same, and it made Five feel sad. He didn't why, but it did. Like this was a goodbye kiss.

Even if they already heard mom calling them to the table, Five kissed one more time after that simple because he didn't want that to be their last kiss for some reason even if they could kiss again after lunch. Something made him want to pull her closer and kissed her properly to make it fun again, but it wasn't. It was desperate and almost heartbreaking and Five didn't understand why did it feel that way or why Vanya looked so worried and tense and all of that. Dad wouldn't punish him too hard for speaking up at lunch. He would agree with him and Five would start trying. He would kiss her afterwards and laugh at her nervousness asking her in a teasing way if she didn't know him better. Maybe that was why he was so upset at lunch maybe that was why dad's words got to him harder than before maybe the strange way they kissed before was why he exploded and ran away not bothering to stop by her weak attempt by shaking her head.

It wasn't until he time-travelled and after a day realized that he was stuck that Five understood that the reason why the kiss felt so off was because it was a goodbye kiss. It was their last kiss. And for the longest of the time Five was repulsed to the absolute core of his being by that kiss and its meaning hating himself and Vanya for letting him have such a terrible last kiss, such a terrible last image, such a terrible last memory of her, of them. But with time and age, Five learned to accept it feeling only mildly bitter by it and rather thinking about all those others good kisses they shared remembering the softness and warm of the inside of her mouth and how delicate her tongue was when it moved against his own. How her hands grabbed his squeezing him tight and how he was allowed to hold her close both denying themselves oxygen just to be able to kiss for a bit longer. Just to be able to kiss her one more time. Just one more time it was all he asked for when he was falling sleep too tired and too awake in the future with no future just ashes, fire and dust.

Then time went on, things changed. Everything happened too fast and yet not fast enough and before he knew it he was standing outside with Vanya saying goodbye to Allison and Claire as he was about to walk her home.

He was confused why was Allison so for him walking Vanya home, but he wasn't one to decline such a request. Things were different now. When he came back to stop the apocalypse, he was in his thirteen year old body, and it took him a while to deal with all the madness and get his old body back. He was old now. A senior citizen while Vanya was still young. Even if he was glad he was able to be in her presence sometime it was hard. For a while he assumed there wouldn't be anything which he could do about them. Too much time has passed. They were different ages. How could he ask her to be with an old man? It wasn't until their first kiss since he came back that he assumed it could be different.

'What is it?' she asked her cheek red from the cold, and he quickly and dismissively shook his head. He had lost himself in his thoughts again. It felt like there was always so much to do, so much going on that he was always miles away in his thoughts that he never got to enjoy her presence fully.

'Nothing,' he shook his head tearing his eyes away from the redness of her lips, 'Good Night.'

She nodded and gave him a tight smile. He wondered how she felt about all of it. About him coming back, about his age. He knew she was shocked when he was in his young body. He knew he could never pursue her looking like that. But now he wondered if she thought about him sometimes, about them what they were and what they could have been before they lost it all.

'Good night.'

He turned around and walked away before he felt her grab his hand suddenly stopping him. He turned around. It was cold to stand outside this long without movement. He wanted to tell her that. But the moment he saw how wide her eyes were filled with the same excitement and anticipation which they had that day she first kissed him, he was left speechless staring at her, waiting for what she would do next.

She swallowed a bit. Courage and dare used to be her strong suit when it came to him, when they were young, when she grew up knowing she could try anything with him and he wouldn't stop her. But that was a long time ago, and Five knew she lost all of that when she was forced to live without him.

'What is it?' he asked her not recognizing his own voice. He was too moved by the movement, her gaze, the feelings he had for her to be able to talk properly and apparently so was she.

So he kissed her.

He kissed her the way he used to imagine he would when he was in the post-apocalypse. The way he thought he would kiss her when he was alone in his poor excuse of a bed wanting to have that one last kiss with. He kissed her the way he should have that last time if he knew it was their last time. He kissed her and grabbed the back of her head and her cheek bringing her closer to him both eagerly trying to pull each other closer. Both so desperate for one another, for their warmth, their touch, their lips, the feeling. Five was willing to choke on the feeling. If he could ever pick a way to die that would be the one. To die with his lips against hers choking on the feeling of their mouths connected, their tongues dancing and their love and desperation consuming them both.

They broke apart both losing the fight for air, but with their hands around one another. Both panting and keeping the other close. The scene oh so familiar to Five, for a moment he thought he time travelled back to when they were kids again.

'I was...afraid,' he found himself saying, 'That it was our last kiss.'

He pressed his cheek against hers. She was freezing. They should go inside, but neither of them made any indication to move.

'The one before I ran away,' he confessed as his fingers went into her locks and he brushed them cursing her for not having a hat. Did she want to catch a cold?

Vanya sighed into his ear, the breath warmed it a bit, 'I didn't.'

He leaned away his hand still caressing her hair, 'What?'

She smiled at him softly. Her smiles weren't' as big as they used to, but it was okay, he had time to make her smile like she used to again.

'I didn't think it was our last kiss,' she said and her eyes sparkled with emotions he was battling as well, 'I knew you would make it back. Besides are there really any last kisses? What if all kisses are first? First one in the library, first one with our eyes closed, first one in the morning, in the evening? First one in this moment, or next moment,' she said before her lips were on his again, this time only pecking him a bit.

He looked down at her again and smirked, 'And the next.'

They kissed again.

'And the next.'

Another kiss.

'And the next.'

And another one.

They lost count of how many first kisses did they share that night. But Five liked her idea a lot. Maybe there really wasn't any last kiss, or even a second one, or third, or sixtieth. Just the endless stream of first ones. The first one when they were four, the first one when they were ten, the first one with their eyes closed, the first one in the morning, the first one at one o'clock, the first one when he felt his stomach flip, the first one when he made her moan.

No last one.

Only an infinite number of first ones.

A.N: I totally listened to MAGIC! – Kiss me on repeat while writing most of this. Anyway, thank you for reading and the support of Fiveya week. If you want leave a feedback.