Title: Picking Up the Pieces Chapter 27
Author: Dawn
Summary: Spike finds something to live for when he thinks that there is nothing left. S/D Takes place after "As You Were". AU after that.
Spoilers: Anything before "As You Were" is fair game.
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Joss still owns it and boy do I miss it.
Distribution: Anywhere but please ask first and keep my name attached.
Author's Note: Okay, I have no excuses. I got lazy. Thanks to all of you who kept e-mailing me to write some more. This chapter is for you.
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Normally in the life of a vampire, three years is the blink of an eye. Compared to eternity, it's really not that long. But for Spike, when you've lost the person who was the very reason you hadn't offed yourself in the first place, unlife seemed to drag by at amazingly slow pace.
The first month after Dawn's disappearance was very difficult for everyone. Buffy was put on suicide watch in the hospital for three days. The doctor's kept her sedated until Giles insisted they stop. He felt it was better for her to deal with what had happened than lie staring at the ceiling for the rest of her life. Once the drugs had worn off, the weeping and raging denial had set in. Giles wound up with a black eye and cracked ribs before his Slayer had finally broken down in his arms. He took her home by Sunday.
Since the Scoobies weren't allowed in the wing of the hospital where Buffy was being kept they were on Spike watch. Not that there was much to watch. They had taken him to his apartment and put him to bed and he hadn't moved since. It was when they had become complacent that he had made his move.
He snuck out and tried to walk into the sun. If he hadn't been so weak from not eating or sleeping, they wouldn't have been able to pull him back inside. Next, he's tried to stake himself. Xander had stopped that attempt in a déjà vu moment. Spike had yelled and cursed and ranted about why they wouldn't just let him die. Buffy had taken charge and locked Spike and herself in the training room at the Magic Box. No one was quite sure what had been said in there but Spike came out looking resigned and none to happy.
But the suicide attempts stopped. He never tried again. But he didn't get better. He was on a level of mourning that none of the gang could understand, not even Buffy. He rarely ate until he was so emaciated Buffy had to intervene again. She knew he wasn't sleeping either, not that he ever had before.
Giles had gone through the motions and filed a missing persons report with the police for appearances. After work everyday, he would sit at the round table in the shop and pour over books trying to find some answers as to why Dawn was gone. A month after Dawn's disappearance was when the memories started to fade. Buffy would forget she had had a sister until she would get home and see Dawn's room. Then the pain would hit her all over again and she would call Spike crying. The other's had very little to remind them of the once vibrant girl so their memories were quicker to go. Everyone got to forget, except Spike. His memories of her were still very much real and vivid in his mind. He didn't get angry with the others for the loss of theirs. They didn't understand why it was happening but he did.
He knew that whatever higher being there might be, this was his way of making it easier for the group to deal with Dawn's 'death'. But, Spike figured since he was damned anyway, he was allowed to remember. He didn't consider it a curse though. Fate might think it was a burden to him but he reveled in them.
Before he knew it, the year was over and a new one began. It was almost unbearable knowing that none of them remembered why he was in so much pain emotionally. They would ask him why he was so different and sad now. He would just shrug it off, not wanting to try and explain it again. Eventually they would stop believing him anyway.
Buffy had cleared out Dawn's room and given most of her stuff to Spike. All the pictures that had included the younger girl's smiling face had suddenly changed to show nothing but Buffy and her mother. The picture in Spike's home, however, of the three Summer's women did not alter. It had gotten to the point where Buffy could not even recall why this other person's stuff was in her home.
She had started training again and had gotten back her tan and gained back some of the weight she had lost. She was radiant once again and Spike was at least happy about that.
It was at the end of the second year that he decided to leave Sunnydale. Buffy didn't need him anymore for patrolling and she didn't understand why he didn't want to further their relationship. All past events had supposedly been forgiven so why didn't he want her now? Knowing there was nothing he could say to make it better, he left. She had cried and begged him to stay then yelled at him that he was just like all the others, but he wasn't in love with her anymore, if he ever really had been.
She finally calmed down and asked that he at least keep in touch so she would know he was okay. He laughed bitterly at that. He would never be okay again. He had left around midnight and spent New Year's Eve getting completely sloshed at a bar in L.A.
From there, he made his way across the States, stopping here and there to see the sights and get drunk again. Good thing his liver was already a lost cause. He found himself in New York in the fall of the third year. He wasn't sure what had brought him here. He'd been here before. Killed his second Slayer here. It pained him to think of Nikki now. Vampires don't feel remorse. Yeah, right. He'd like to find the guy who had written all that rot.
He took over the top floor of an old abandoned brownstone. Only had to kill six vamps to do it. Once there, he slept for four days straight not even waking to feed. He hadn't killed a human since he'd found out the chip didn't work. He wasn't sure why he hadn't turned back to his feral ways once Dawn had disappeared. He still felt like she was watching him somehow and she wouldn't have liked it if he'd started feeding again. He kept to the animal blood and occasionally had a glass of O neg at a demon bar once in a while.
At night, he would stalk the back streets of the city that didn't sleep and take care of random demons and vamps. Making the world safe for puppies and Christmas. It kept the demon in him happy and helped him work off the excess grief that weighed him down till he felt like he was crawling under it sometimes.
It was on his third week in the city that he realized he must live near the university. He had saved quite a few drunken kids over the past few days and after a brief walk to the end of his block he saw that there was actually a lot of university housing around here. Also, the pub he'd found and fallen in love with seemed to sport a lot of youngsters as well. It was called O'Malley's and it reminded him a great deal of his time spent in Ireland and Scotland. The hard wood floors gleamed but were worn by time and shoes. The heavy oak tables were scarred and ring-stained from to many spills. There was a large stone fireplace against one wall and the lights were kept low to create a cozy, comfortable atmosphere. Most of the college crowd stayed near the fire, lying around on the overstuffed couches and armchairs. He'd catch snippets of conversation about authors and teachers and philosophy. They'd probably be shocked at some of the things he could tell them from his nearly two centuries of life on this planet. Their naiveté was both amusing and sad.
It was on one of those nights as he sat in at his dark corner booth nursing a Guinness that the door to the pub opened and in breezed what had to be a ghost. He nearly spit his beer all over the table at the sight of a chocolate-haired, blue-eyed waif who went straight up to the bar, leaned over it, and smacked a kiss on Mr. O'Malley's ruddy cheek. He laughed loudly and touched her face as if they knew each other well. This had to be the old man's daughter, but how? Spike couldn't think, he couldn't move. It was impossible. He'd listened as the old gent had told him of his nineteen-year-old girl who was in her second year at NYU. Going to be a doctor or a dancer he had laughed, depending on if the second choice didn't pan out. He'd described her thoroughly but how many blue-eyed brunettes were there in the world? Thousands, millions?
He watched her through wide eyes and his mouth hanging open as she bounded behind the counter to hug Mr. O'Malley. They talked quickly and then she grabbed an apron and started clearing away empty bottles and used napkins. He tried to get her to stop but she shooed him away and began taking orders from the people standing around.
There was an odd ache in his chest and for just a moment he felt something warm just behind his breastbone. Hope. It was a strange sensation and one he hadn't felt since the night he'd seen Buffy coming down the stairs after she'd been dead for three months. It had been so long since he's felt it but he welcomed it.
"Dawn," he whispered to himself. The name sounded foreign on his tongue. He hadn't said it in nearly three years. He wasn't sure what to do next. He couldn't run up to her and grab her and kiss her completely senseless as he wanted. She obviously wasn't his Dawn. That caused a sharp pain through the warmth in his body but he pushed it aside. She looked so happy and so..normal.
She was laughing at something one of the guys at the bar had said and Spike could see that the people here knew her well. She must work here when she wasn't at school. So where had she been the past three weeks he'd been here? Then he remembered his last talk with Mr. O'Malley. She'd spent a month in England doing an internship of some sort for one of her credits. She must have just gotten home.
He fell back against the solid wood of the booth and let out a whoosh of air. He honestly felt like someone had punched him in the stomach. She continued to work consistently and comfortably around the pub as he sat there having his whole world turned upside down. Dawn was alive.
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Katelyn had felt the man's eyes on her almost as soon as she'd entered the pub. At first, she thought he might be someone she knew but at a quick glance she dismissed that theory. She ignored him for the moment and went to her father for a brief hello. They would talk more at home after the bar closed. She'd been away for a month and had lots to tell her parents about all she'd seen and experienced in England. Her father would have lots of comments, mostly negative, she was sure considering his Irish heritage but he would listen and be glad that she'd enjoyed herself.
She put on her apron and while cleaning up the bar, tried to get a better look at the guy who was, as far as she could tell, still staring at her. He sat in the corner and the shadows seemed to adore him. He wore all black and his bleached hair almost glowed in the low light. She nearly cursed at the darkness around him hiding his face from her. His gaze was like the sun on her skin. She actually had goose bumps and couldn't suppress a shiver. God, she was acting like she'd never seen an attractive man before. At least, she thought he was attractive. Hard to tell with all that dark around him.
Okay, this was ridiculous. She'd just go over there and ask him if he needed anything and get this whole mysterious thing out of the way. She did it slow. Going to other tables first and finally she was standing in front of him and damn, but he wasn't ugly. Eyes the color of the sky in summer bored into her until she couldn't breathe at the intense look he was giving her. Cheekbones to die for and a full lower lip that just begged to be nibbled on. Katelyn shook her head to clear those thoughts out and smiled slightly.
"Can I get you anything else?" She asked before she realized his bottle was still half fool. Idiot. He probably thought she was a complete dimwit.
He didn't speak for a few minutes and she didn't know if it was because she left him speechless of he was waiting to formulate small words.
"You are the most stunning creature I have ever seen."
Okay, knees were buckling now. He had the sexiest voice that had ever graced her ears. Low and deadly with the English accent thrown in for an extra wow. He could read the dictionary to her and she'd be all over him. And what the hell had he just said to her?
She knew she was blushing, curse her Irish skin. No man had ever said anything quite like that to her before and she didn't know whether he was just giving her a line or being sincere. She wanted to believe the latter.
"Don't get out much, huh?" She joked but when he didn't even crack a smile she cleared her throat uncomfortably. Tough crowd.
"Sorry, it's just.I work here and get a lot of guys with one too many drinks in them and suddenly I'm a goddess." She explained.
He held up his beer.
"This is my first." He assured her. She couldn't help but smile. Why did she feel like she knew this man? Something niggled in the back of her brain as if trying to push it's way to the front. She nearly dropped the tray she was carrying as a sharp pain tore through her skull. The man was beside her so fast she jumped. He grabbed her arm and looked worriedly at her.
"Are you all right, luv?" As soon as he touched her she gasped at the electrical charge that ran up her arm and through the rest of her body like a freight train. Who the hell was this guy?
"I'm okay. Jet lag, I guess." She put her fingers against her temple and messaged at the throbbing that had started after the flash of pain.
"Here, sit down for a minute. I'm sure your dad won't mind." He pulled her to the table and helped her to sit and then scooted in beside her blocking her escape.
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Spike couldn't believe it. She was here and he was touching her. Surely this had to be heaven. He kept his hand on her arm even after he helped her to sit and took in her features like a starving man who had just been offered a seven-course meal. She had cut her hair, or maybe for this girl it had always been short. It curved around her face softly bringing attention to her flawless, porcelain skin. Her blue eyes were pain-filled at the moment but before he had seen the confusion in them. If this were Dawn, just in another way, then maybe her mind was trying to remember him.
"You know my dad?"
Spike suddenly realized she was speaking.
"Uh, a little. Only been coming here about three weeks. Nice bloke. Loves you more than life itself."
The girl looked over to where her father was wiping down the wooden bar.
"Yeah, I know."
She sounded almost wistful, a note of sadness in her tone.
"Isn't that a good thing, pet? Parents who adore you and all that." Spike asked. He couldn't keep a little sarcasm out of it.
She turned to him and looked him straight in the eye and it nearly felled him. Everything shrunk to this point between them. Every other person in the pub disappeared and it was just the two of them. They stared into one another's eyes for what seemed like ages but in reality was probably minutes.
He could see her mind working overtime trying desperately to place him or categorize him and coming up with nothing. He could sense her growing frustration. Her heart rate was accelerated and her breathing was fast and shallow. Suddenly, she grabbed his hand, the one that had been resting on her arm.
"I know you. I know I do. I don't know from where or when but I know your face." She said fervently. Spike placed his other hand over hers rubbed her knuckles lightly. He felt her shiver. He looked back up.
"Don't try so hard, pigeon. It'll come."
"So, I do know you." That seemed to calm her. At least she wasn't crazy.
"No."
Her face fell immediately. He chuckled a little at how much like Buffy she looked when she did that.
"You don't know me but.it's difficult to explain. You as someone else knew me very well."
Katelyn felt the goose bumps again at the way he said 'very well'. So someone who wasn't her but was had had a relationship with this man. Lucky her. Sure wished she could remember it. Her head had started to throb again.
"You all right, Katelyn?"
Both of them turned to find Mr. O'Malley standing over them with a fiercely protective look.
"I'm fine, dad. Just a sudden headache. Probably just from the time change. This gentlemen was just letting me sit down till it goes away."
Mr. O'Malley seemed to suddenly realize who the man was.
"Ah, Spike my lad. Didn't know it was you. So, you've met me pride and joy there you have. Katelyn this is Spike. Spike, this is my daughter, Katelyn." The two turned to each other and remembered almost simultaneously that they were still holding hands. They pulled away quickly and threw shy smiles at each other.
"Spike?" She asked playfully.
He shrugged it off.
"Nickname, pet."
"Oh, yeah? How'd you get it?"
"You don't want to know and I really don't want to tell you. I just met you. Rather you hate me later than right now."
"Ah, sordid past, huh."
He leered at her a little and turned up the charm.
"You have no idea."
She actually laughed at that. It was like music to him. It had been so long since he'd heard it and he had thought to never hear it again. The why of all of this was there in his mind but he was close to her now and the whys could wait till he got home. Till he wasn't looking at her beautiful face and touching her soft skin. Till he wasn't falling in love with her all over again.
Dawn was thrown by all of this. She knew this man. She was sure of it. But how and from where did she know him? Her father seemed to like him and that was saying something since he'd only seemed to know him for a short time and he was English. But these weird feelings of familiarity were starting to frustrate her. Every time he touched her it was like coming home and his voice was like a balm on her frayed nerves.
"Katelyn, did ya here me girl?"
Her father's voice finally broke through and she dragged her gaze from Spike.
"What dad?"
Her father smiled and winked at her.
"If you're gonna be helpin' me out then up with ya. There's some thirsty gents at the bar." He informed her, still smiling as he walked away.
She rolled her eyes and grinned at Spike and little embarrassed by her father's obvious match making.
"I guess I better earn my keep."
Spike didn't want to let her go. Now that he knew she was alive he didn't want to take his eyes off of her. But he slid from the booth and let her out. She stopped and turned to him.
"Will you be back tomorrow night?" She didn't want to sound desperate but she had to figure out what was going on in her head.
"You won't be able to get rid of me." He promised. She smiled at that and went back to the bar.
Spike sat back down and took a swig of his now warm beer. He continued to watch her and smirk at her when he caught her looking at him. He'd found her. After three long years of torment, he'd found his sun. But would she remember him? Would fate allow her the memory of what they had shared before she'd been molded into this life? And what new memories did she have. What had been pushed on her now that had never really happened?
He had forever to find out and suddenly eternity wasn't looking so bad.
TBC
Author: Dawn
Summary: Spike finds something to live for when he thinks that there is nothing left. S/D Takes place after "As You Were". AU after that.
Spoilers: Anything before "As You Were" is fair game.
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Joss still owns it and boy do I miss it.
Distribution: Anywhere but please ask first and keep my name attached.
Author's Note: Okay, I have no excuses. I got lazy. Thanks to all of you who kept e-mailing me to write some more. This chapter is for you.
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Normally in the life of a vampire, three years is the blink of an eye. Compared to eternity, it's really not that long. But for Spike, when you've lost the person who was the very reason you hadn't offed yourself in the first place, unlife seemed to drag by at amazingly slow pace.
The first month after Dawn's disappearance was very difficult for everyone. Buffy was put on suicide watch in the hospital for three days. The doctor's kept her sedated until Giles insisted they stop. He felt it was better for her to deal with what had happened than lie staring at the ceiling for the rest of her life. Once the drugs had worn off, the weeping and raging denial had set in. Giles wound up with a black eye and cracked ribs before his Slayer had finally broken down in his arms. He took her home by Sunday.
Since the Scoobies weren't allowed in the wing of the hospital where Buffy was being kept they were on Spike watch. Not that there was much to watch. They had taken him to his apartment and put him to bed and he hadn't moved since. It was when they had become complacent that he had made his move.
He snuck out and tried to walk into the sun. If he hadn't been so weak from not eating or sleeping, they wouldn't have been able to pull him back inside. Next, he's tried to stake himself. Xander had stopped that attempt in a déjà vu moment. Spike had yelled and cursed and ranted about why they wouldn't just let him die. Buffy had taken charge and locked Spike and herself in the training room at the Magic Box. No one was quite sure what had been said in there but Spike came out looking resigned and none to happy.
But the suicide attempts stopped. He never tried again. But he didn't get better. He was on a level of mourning that none of the gang could understand, not even Buffy. He rarely ate until he was so emaciated Buffy had to intervene again. She knew he wasn't sleeping either, not that he ever had before.
Giles had gone through the motions and filed a missing persons report with the police for appearances. After work everyday, he would sit at the round table in the shop and pour over books trying to find some answers as to why Dawn was gone. A month after Dawn's disappearance was when the memories started to fade. Buffy would forget she had had a sister until she would get home and see Dawn's room. Then the pain would hit her all over again and she would call Spike crying. The other's had very little to remind them of the once vibrant girl so their memories were quicker to go. Everyone got to forget, except Spike. His memories of her were still very much real and vivid in his mind. He didn't get angry with the others for the loss of theirs. They didn't understand why it was happening but he did.
He knew that whatever higher being there might be, this was his way of making it easier for the group to deal with Dawn's 'death'. But, Spike figured since he was damned anyway, he was allowed to remember. He didn't consider it a curse though. Fate might think it was a burden to him but he reveled in them.
Before he knew it, the year was over and a new one began. It was almost unbearable knowing that none of them remembered why he was in so much pain emotionally. They would ask him why he was so different and sad now. He would just shrug it off, not wanting to try and explain it again. Eventually they would stop believing him anyway.
Buffy had cleared out Dawn's room and given most of her stuff to Spike. All the pictures that had included the younger girl's smiling face had suddenly changed to show nothing but Buffy and her mother. The picture in Spike's home, however, of the three Summer's women did not alter. It had gotten to the point where Buffy could not even recall why this other person's stuff was in her home.
She had started training again and had gotten back her tan and gained back some of the weight she had lost. She was radiant once again and Spike was at least happy about that.
It was at the end of the second year that he decided to leave Sunnydale. Buffy didn't need him anymore for patrolling and she didn't understand why he didn't want to further their relationship. All past events had supposedly been forgiven so why didn't he want her now? Knowing there was nothing he could say to make it better, he left. She had cried and begged him to stay then yelled at him that he was just like all the others, but he wasn't in love with her anymore, if he ever really had been.
She finally calmed down and asked that he at least keep in touch so she would know he was okay. He laughed bitterly at that. He would never be okay again. He had left around midnight and spent New Year's Eve getting completely sloshed at a bar in L.A.
From there, he made his way across the States, stopping here and there to see the sights and get drunk again. Good thing his liver was already a lost cause. He found himself in New York in the fall of the third year. He wasn't sure what had brought him here. He'd been here before. Killed his second Slayer here. It pained him to think of Nikki now. Vampires don't feel remorse. Yeah, right. He'd like to find the guy who had written all that rot.
He took over the top floor of an old abandoned brownstone. Only had to kill six vamps to do it. Once there, he slept for four days straight not even waking to feed. He hadn't killed a human since he'd found out the chip didn't work. He wasn't sure why he hadn't turned back to his feral ways once Dawn had disappeared. He still felt like she was watching him somehow and she wouldn't have liked it if he'd started feeding again. He kept to the animal blood and occasionally had a glass of O neg at a demon bar once in a while.
At night, he would stalk the back streets of the city that didn't sleep and take care of random demons and vamps. Making the world safe for puppies and Christmas. It kept the demon in him happy and helped him work off the excess grief that weighed him down till he felt like he was crawling under it sometimes.
It was on his third week in the city that he realized he must live near the university. He had saved quite a few drunken kids over the past few days and after a brief walk to the end of his block he saw that there was actually a lot of university housing around here. Also, the pub he'd found and fallen in love with seemed to sport a lot of youngsters as well. It was called O'Malley's and it reminded him a great deal of his time spent in Ireland and Scotland. The hard wood floors gleamed but were worn by time and shoes. The heavy oak tables were scarred and ring-stained from to many spills. There was a large stone fireplace against one wall and the lights were kept low to create a cozy, comfortable atmosphere. Most of the college crowd stayed near the fire, lying around on the overstuffed couches and armchairs. He'd catch snippets of conversation about authors and teachers and philosophy. They'd probably be shocked at some of the things he could tell them from his nearly two centuries of life on this planet. Their naiveté was both amusing and sad.
It was on one of those nights as he sat in at his dark corner booth nursing a Guinness that the door to the pub opened and in breezed what had to be a ghost. He nearly spit his beer all over the table at the sight of a chocolate-haired, blue-eyed waif who went straight up to the bar, leaned over it, and smacked a kiss on Mr. O'Malley's ruddy cheek. He laughed loudly and touched her face as if they knew each other well. This had to be the old man's daughter, but how? Spike couldn't think, he couldn't move. It was impossible. He'd listened as the old gent had told him of his nineteen-year-old girl who was in her second year at NYU. Going to be a doctor or a dancer he had laughed, depending on if the second choice didn't pan out. He'd described her thoroughly but how many blue-eyed brunettes were there in the world? Thousands, millions?
He watched her through wide eyes and his mouth hanging open as she bounded behind the counter to hug Mr. O'Malley. They talked quickly and then she grabbed an apron and started clearing away empty bottles and used napkins. He tried to get her to stop but she shooed him away and began taking orders from the people standing around.
There was an odd ache in his chest and for just a moment he felt something warm just behind his breastbone. Hope. It was a strange sensation and one he hadn't felt since the night he'd seen Buffy coming down the stairs after she'd been dead for three months. It had been so long since he's felt it but he welcomed it.
"Dawn," he whispered to himself. The name sounded foreign on his tongue. He hadn't said it in nearly three years. He wasn't sure what to do next. He couldn't run up to her and grab her and kiss her completely senseless as he wanted. She obviously wasn't his Dawn. That caused a sharp pain through the warmth in his body but he pushed it aside. She looked so happy and so..normal.
She was laughing at something one of the guys at the bar had said and Spike could see that the people here knew her well. She must work here when she wasn't at school. So where had she been the past three weeks he'd been here? Then he remembered his last talk with Mr. O'Malley. She'd spent a month in England doing an internship of some sort for one of her credits. She must have just gotten home.
He fell back against the solid wood of the booth and let out a whoosh of air. He honestly felt like someone had punched him in the stomach. She continued to work consistently and comfortably around the pub as he sat there having his whole world turned upside down. Dawn was alive.
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Katelyn had felt the man's eyes on her almost as soon as she'd entered the pub. At first, she thought he might be someone she knew but at a quick glance she dismissed that theory. She ignored him for the moment and went to her father for a brief hello. They would talk more at home after the bar closed. She'd been away for a month and had lots to tell her parents about all she'd seen and experienced in England. Her father would have lots of comments, mostly negative, she was sure considering his Irish heritage but he would listen and be glad that she'd enjoyed herself.
She put on her apron and while cleaning up the bar, tried to get a better look at the guy who was, as far as she could tell, still staring at her. He sat in the corner and the shadows seemed to adore him. He wore all black and his bleached hair almost glowed in the low light. She nearly cursed at the darkness around him hiding his face from her. His gaze was like the sun on her skin. She actually had goose bumps and couldn't suppress a shiver. God, she was acting like she'd never seen an attractive man before. At least, she thought he was attractive. Hard to tell with all that dark around him.
Okay, this was ridiculous. She'd just go over there and ask him if he needed anything and get this whole mysterious thing out of the way. She did it slow. Going to other tables first and finally she was standing in front of him and damn, but he wasn't ugly. Eyes the color of the sky in summer bored into her until she couldn't breathe at the intense look he was giving her. Cheekbones to die for and a full lower lip that just begged to be nibbled on. Katelyn shook her head to clear those thoughts out and smiled slightly.
"Can I get you anything else?" She asked before she realized his bottle was still half fool. Idiot. He probably thought she was a complete dimwit.
He didn't speak for a few minutes and she didn't know if it was because she left him speechless of he was waiting to formulate small words.
"You are the most stunning creature I have ever seen."
Okay, knees were buckling now. He had the sexiest voice that had ever graced her ears. Low and deadly with the English accent thrown in for an extra wow. He could read the dictionary to her and she'd be all over him. And what the hell had he just said to her?
She knew she was blushing, curse her Irish skin. No man had ever said anything quite like that to her before and she didn't know whether he was just giving her a line or being sincere. She wanted to believe the latter.
"Don't get out much, huh?" She joked but when he didn't even crack a smile she cleared her throat uncomfortably. Tough crowd.
"Sorry, it's just.I work here and get a lot of guys with one too many drinks in them and suddenly I'm a goddess." She explained.
He held up his beer.
"This is my first." He assured her. She couldn't help but smile. Why did she feel like she knew this man? Something niggled in the back of her brain as if trying to push it's way to the front. She nearly dropped the tray she was carrying as a sharp pain tore through her skull. The man was beside her so fast she jumped. He grabbed her arm and looked worriedly at her.
"Are you all right, luv?" As soon as he touched her she gasped at the electrical charge that ran up her arm and through the rest of her body like a freight train. Who the hell was this guy?
"I'm okay. Jet lag, I guess." She put her fingers against her temple and messaged at the throbbing that had started after the flash of pain.
"Here, sit down for a minute. I'm sure your dad won't mind." He pulled her to the table and helped her to sit and then scooted in beside her blocking her escape.
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Spike couldn't believe it. She was here and he was touching her. Surely this had to be heaven. He kept his hand on her arm even after he helped her to sit and took in her features like a starving man who had just been offered a seven-course meal. She had cut her hair, or maybe for this girl it had always been short. It curved around her face softly bringing attention to her flawless, porcelain skin. Her blue eyes were pain-filled at the moment but before he had seen the confusion in them. If this were Dawn, just in another way, then maybe her mind was trying to remember him.
"You know my dad?"
Spike suddenly realized she was speaking.
"Uh, a little. Only been coming here about three weeks. Nice bloke. Loves you more than life itself."
The girl looked over to where her father was wiping down the wooden bar.
"Yeah, I know."
She sounded almost wistful, a note of sadness in her tone.
"Isn't that a good thing, pet? Parents who adore you and all that." Spike asked. He couldn't keep a little sarcasm out of it.
She turned to him and looked him straight in the eye and it nearly felled him. Everything shrunk to this point between them. Every other person in the pub disappeared and it was just the two of them. They stared into one another's eyes for what seemed like ages but in reality was probably minutes.
He could see her mind working overtime trying desperately to place him or categorize him and coming up with nothing. He could sense her growing frustration. Her heart rate was accelerated and her breathing was fast and shallow. Suddenly, she grabbed his hand, the one that had been resting on her arm.
"I know you. I know I do. I don't know from where or when but I know your face." She said fervently. Spike placed his other hand over hers rubbed her knuckles lightly. He felt her shiver. He looked back up.
"Don't try so hard, pigeon. It'll come."
"So, I do know you." That seemed to calm her. At least she wasn't crazy.
"No."
Her face fell immediately. He chuckled a little at how much like Buffy she looked when she did that.
"You don't know me but.it's difficult to explain. You as someone else knew me very well."
Katelyn felt the goose bumps again at the way he said 'very well'. So someone who wasn't her but was had had a relationship with this man. Lucky her. Sure wished she could remember it. Her head had started to throb again.
"You all right, Katelyn?"
Both of them turned to find Mr. O'Malley standing over them with a fiercely protective look.
"I'm fine, dad. Just a sudden headache. Probably just from the time change. This gentlemen was just letting me sit down till it goes away."
Mr. O'Malley seemed to suddenly realize who the man was.
"Ah, Spike my lad. Didn't know it was you. So, you've met me pride and joy there you have. Katelyn this is Spike. Spike, this is my daughter, Katelyn." The two turned to each other and remembered almost simultaneously that they were still holding hands. They pulled away quickly and threw shy smiles at each other.
"Spike?" She asked playfully.
He shrugged it off.
"Nickname, pet."
"Oh, yeah? How'd you get it?"
"You don't want to know and I really don't want to tell you. I just met you. Rather you hate me later than right now."
"Ah, sordid past, huh."
He leered at her a little and turned up the charm.
"You have no idea."
She actually laughed at that. It was like music to him. It had been so long since he'd heard it and he had thought to never hear it again. The why of all of this was there in his mind but he was close to her now and the whys could wait till he got home. Till he wasn't looking at her beautiful face and touching her soft skin. Till he wasn't falling in love with her all over again.
Dawn was thrown by all of this. She knew this man. She was sure of it. But how and from where did she know him? Her father seemed to like him and that was saying something since he'd only seemed to know him for a short time and he was English. But these weird feelings of familiarity were starting to frustrate her. Every time he touched her it was like coming home and his voice was like a balm on her frayed nerves.
"Katelyn, did ya here me girl?"
Her father's voice finally broke through and she dragged her gaze from Spike.
"What dad?"
Her father smiled and winked at her.
"If you're gonna be helpin' me out then up with ya. There's some thirsty gents at the bar." He informed her, still smiling as he walked away.
She rolled her eyes and grinned at Spike and little embarrassed by her father's obvious match making.
"I guess I better earn my keep."
Spike didn't want to let her go. Now that he knew she was alive he didn't want to take his eyes off of her. But he slid from the booth and let her out. She stopped and turned to him.
"Will you be back tomorrow night?" She didn't want to sound desperate but she had to figure out what was going on in her head.
"You won't be able to get rid of me." He promised. She smiled at that and went back to the bar.
Spike sat back down and took a swig of his now warm beer. He continued to watch her and smirk at her when he caught her looking at him. He'd found her. After three long years of torment, he'd found his sun. But would she remember him? Would fate allow her the memory of what they had shared before she'd been molded into this life? And what new memories did she have. What had been pushed on her now that had never really happened?
He had forever to find out and suddenly eternity wasn't looking so bad.
TBC