Author's Note: Enjoy!

Disclaimer: The following characters belong to J.K. Rowling, and this story derives from her original works, storylines, and world. Please do not sue me, I can barely pay tuition.

Warnings: NA

Stacked with: MC4A; Hogwarts; Shipping Wars

Individual Challenge(s): Family Game Night; Gryffindor MC (x2); Winter Wonderland; Golden Times; Old Shoes; Themes & Things A (Love); Themes & Things B (Risk); In a Flash; Yellow Ribbon; Yellow Ribbon Redux

Word Count: 695

Shipping Wars

Ship (Team): Percy Weasley/Oliver Wood (Quidditch Loving Bookworms)

List (Prompt): Summer Medium 1 (First Fight)

Reciprocal Ridiculousness

Percy took a few deep breaths and puffed up his chest with as much authority and power as he could manage before tightening the scarf around his neck and stomping outside, the extra cloak over his arm.

The snow fell in puffy flakes that melted upon contact and the bone chilled him to his bones. This made it even more difficult for him to understand why in Merlin's name his boyfriend was dashing through the air in even colder attitudes.

"OLIVER JONATHAN WOOD!" Percy shouted out with a surprising lung capacity he could only assume had been inherited from his mother. "GET BACK DOWN HERE RIGHT THIS INSTANT!"

Wood stopped his arc through the air and looked down at Percy before darting back to the ground. He didn't dismount his broom, however: just hovered three feet off the ground.

"Percy? What are you—"

"A better question might be what are you doing?" Percy said.

"I was having trouble visualizing this new flight path I want to give the girls—"

"So you thought to yourself 'well, I better go freeze to death instead' and conveniently walked outside and discovered it to be mid-January?" Percy scoffed.

"I was—you said it yourself, I have an applied and tactile learning style!" Oliver said.

"No," Percy said. "Don't turn this on me."

He extended the cloak.

"Get off that flying thing, put this on, and come back to Gryffindor tower so that we can warm you up with a bath and a cup of tea!" Percy said.

"That's it? Can't think of anything a little bit more… attractive?" Oliver grinned.

"This is not a joke Oliver! Get back down here."

Oliver looked at him in shock for a few seconds, and then he broke out into a grin.

"Make me," he said. And then he shot up into the air like an arrow, flying away.

Percy sighed. Why was it that he had chosen this boy, again?

"If you do this, I will take away so many points from Gryffindor that it'll be like you never even won the cup if you do nab it!" Percy shouted out.

"Fat chance of that happening, dear! We both want that House Cup badly! Need I remind you since that's how this all started?"

Oliver was flying around in circles, taunting him.

"For goodness' sake," Percy scoffed and considered his options. Having grown up with Fred and George, part of him knew that sometimes the only way to counter total and complete buffoonery was to do something equally ridiculous in turn…

And so he reached up to unclasp his own cloak and drop it in the snow. The cold pierced through his remaining layers immediately but pure stubbornness stopped him from hissing. He pulled off his scarf before tossing his gloves off too.

"What are you doing?" Oliver called down.

"Abandoning all reason since that's what you've gone and done!" Percy said. He pulled off his newest Weasley sweater, which dragged his tuque off his head. He wondered if he'd have to kick off his boots or trousers next…

"Percy, you'll freeze!"

"So will you, you foolish broomhead!" Percy called back up.

Oliver dove towards the ground but straightened up in the nick of time, like the total show-off that he was. He dismounted and stomped towards Percy, snow peppering his hair and robes.

"Are you mad, Percy?" Oliver asking, picking his knitted sweater off of the ground and shaking some of the snow off of it. "Put this back on…"

"I'm not going inside until you do," Percy said, crossing his arms stubbornly—though he was also happy to discover that sticking his hands under his armpits did warm him up some.

"You're impossible," Oliver said.

"You started it," Percy said.

"Just this time," Oliver said, picking up the rest of Percy's clothes. He offered them to him, but Percy didn't budge. He held out his hand expectantly.

"Broom," he demanded.

"What? Percy…"

"Broom," Percy said. "I won't have you flying away again."

Oliver sighed but handed over his broom, at which point Percy accepted to throw his cloak back on over his shoulders and run back to the castle, boyfriend in tow.