Can't Lose Him

Based on a series of prompts from our faithful follower Mbeckettcastle, we sincerely hope we did it justice and you enjoy our efforts. TOTALLY AU, We don't own the rights to any of the show's characters, only used for fun, the story starts out following Canon BUT we reserve the right to change times, dates, and ages to make our story plots work, Thank You Tom, Tim, Cece AKA CTTFICFAN

Chp 1

Kate wanted to solve her case but without a lead, she was just wasting her time. This case was definitely one of the Beckett Flavored as they called them, full of both robbery and murder. It was one of the rare times she would consent to work with another detective not from her Homicide floor but, she thought she would let whoever they sent to help, just do the theft part and as long as they stayed out of her way, she would be happy.

She was just about to inquire who drew the assignment from Robbery when a tall sandy-haired man strode toward her and announced,

"Detective Beckett? I'm detective Tom Demming from Robbery Division, they said you were going to need assistance on this case."

"Hi Detective Demming, and I never said I needed help, I was told to include Robbery to handle that part of the case while we focused on the murder." She said a bit harsher than she had intended.

Rick sat on the sideline, in his chair, doing what he did best, people watch and from where he sat there was definitely some sparks flying between the two detectives, not over case details but when they looked at each other, it was almost like watching them undress the other with their eyes.

Kate had never behaved like this with anyone before and it just helped confirm the feeling Rick had been having for quite some time, no matter what he did, in Beckett's eyes he would never be enough, not enough to be anything more than the Consultant who wormed his way into her life through his contacts with the Mayor's office.

For the next few hours, Rick listened and watched as Detective Demming was brought up to speed on the facts of the case and presented his best case of flirting with the female cop. To her credit, Becket was as flirtatious or more so than the new Detective, almost to a point where Rick was getting embarrassed. He thought about uttering the suggestions "get a room" but he knew she would kill him if he said it.

Several hours later they were conducting an interview with one of the chief suspects, Victor Racine. To Rick, they were getting nothing useful with their questions, but apparently, they both thought differently, perhaps the ongoing open flirting was the distraction that clouded his understanding of the progress of "real cops"

Finally, the interview was over, with the two detectives congratulating the other for what Rick had no clue. He watched her as she watched detective Demming walk away. And when she looked back at him, at least she had the sense to be just a little ashamed. And then she said to him, "What?"

His answer was, "Nothing. Nothing at all." And then they preceded to leave Victor Racine's office.

It was then when detective Demming had a thought.

"Detective Beckett I have a hunch I want to check out. If this pans out, I think you'll have a solid lead you need to move forward." He called out over his shoulder,

"Thanks, Tom," Kate said as he continued to walk away.

Rick knew right there that there was not a chance in hell, all doubts were gone and any hopes dead now. He would never be with Kate in that way now, even if wonder boy from Robbery hadn't come along there would have been someone or something else that would prevent her from seeing him as anything but a nuisance.

His decision was now crystal clear but he would not be childish in a manner of speaking when he told her that he was finished following her around. He would take the high road and be the bigger man so to speak.

He should have known that she would be more interested in something that Demming could offer. It would be tough for him to continue to follow her around like he had been doing for the past year, especially now with the obvious flirtations going on between the two, but he would help her finish this case and then that would be it.

The ride back to the precinct was quiet, not at all like their normal carefree banter. Gone where her constant admonishments of something he had proposed or said about an alien suspect, or theories since he had been completely silent all the way back to the station.

"Castle, you OK?" she asked as they pulled into her parking space, "I mean you haven't said a word since we left Racine's office," Kate asked softly,

"I'm fine Detective, perfectly fine" he replied softly and flashed her his public smile, the one he showed the press.

Kate started to ask him some follow up questions but was surprised when she saw he was already up out of the car and headed toward the elevator to homicide floor before she even knew he was gone. She hung back for a minute and Detective Demming joined her for the elevator ride back to her desk.

When they arrived at their floor and started out of the elevator, Tom was babbling on and on, but Kate's eyes searched out her partner. She finally saw him, just inside the breakroom, with the door closed. She started toward him, then noticed he was on the phone and didn't look happy so she returned to her desk.

A few moments later she picked up Rick out of the corner of her eye and fully expected him to sit in his chair next to her desk. She waited, and finally looked up,

Rick started to speak and said "Sorry to intrude, Detective Beckett, I have something that I need to take care of and I'm confident that you and Demming can handle whatever comes up. Please let me know if something major comes up with the lead he's working, just give me a call, and I'll try to get back today. If not, I'll be back tomorrow morning."

"Castle, what do you mean you'll be back in the morning? Aren't you going to wait and find out what lead detective Demming might have?"

"Listen, Kate, this is your show, it's your case and you run it how you see fit. I'm only a consultant and not a real cop as you both keep reminding me. I really do have to attend this meeting I forgot all about honestly."

"Castle, what about the case? Don't you want to know what we find? It's only noon and there could be a lot we discover."

"Kate you've been a detective for the past six years. The last three of those years you been a lead detective. I'm pretty sure that you don't need my assistance. You've done quite fine solving cases without me and it seems that detective Demming is sweet on you. Now I really do have to get to a meeting with my publisher. On that note detective Beckett, I will see you bright and early in the morning."

By the time Rick made it down to the stairs and into the lobby he already had a plan formulating in his head. Tomorrow will come and like always he will help her solve the case with whatever clues they unearthed today.

As he pushed the door open to the lobby he wondered if he was just a little bit jealous. He shook it off and walked out onto the sidewalk to hail a cab. The ride took twenty minutes and he ended up back at the loft. He knew that his mother was away up in Lake George doing summer stock, and Alexis had a sleepover with her friend Paige after school. So, the loft was all his.

Kate returned back to the twelfth precinct and no sooner had she sat down at her desk, Demming arrived on the homicide floor. He scanned the floor to see if she was there and when their eyes locked, he was quick to move towards her.

"It seems that this was a good hunch Detective Beckett. We have the financials on Finch. It seems that he was getting regular payments for carrying out shady deliveries for Racine. The only problem was he would take every fifth shipment and sell it on his own keeping the cash."

"How does that get us any closer to Racine?"

"All we need to do is dig into his life and I'm sure that we'll find something to connect him to this murder," Demming said.

Xx

The next morning came, Rick was torn with emotions but sadly ordered the last coffee that he would ever bring Kate Beckett. He gathered the familiar to-go order from the barista and headed towards the twelfth. As he climbed the stairs to enter, he was almost mowed down by Kate, Esposito, Ryan, and Demming as they rush down the stairs to get to their cars.

"What's going on?" Rick asked.

"Castle, I can't talk right now. We have a solid lead on Racine. We need to get there before he starts to destroy evidence." Kate said as she and Demming reach her cruiser.

Rick watched as they took off like bats out of hell, with a stranger riding in his familiar spot, eh better get used to it, not even gone and already replaced. He looked down at the coffee he was holding and decided to toss hers. What's the difference anyway? It would be cold by the time she got to drink it. He turned back in the direction of the loft and he walked away from the precinct, forgoing a cab to allow a long walk to clear his head, now if it could only do the same for his heart.

Xx

The following morning, he repeated the heartbreaking sequence of the previous day and arrived at the twelfth with yet another cup of coffee for her. This time he found her at her desk filling out paperwork for the case she was working. He placed her cup of coffee on her desk and took his customary seat next to her desk.

"Thanks, Castle."

"You're welcome, Beckett."

"You should have stayed yesterday Castle. The information we got from Racine's financials solved the case. We arrested him yesterday afternoon for the murder of Finch."

"Well, detective there was never a doubt in my mind. I knew you would solve it and that makes what I am going to say that much easier. I'm behind the eight ball with my latest chapters I owe to Black Pawn, and I'm feeling the heat as only Gina knows how to deliver.

Now that you solved this case, I figured that now would be the best time to part ways. God knows I've been a pain in your ass for the past year, but I will cherish the time I spent here with you, Esposito, Ryan."

The second that he said they were going to part ways her heart practically stopped beating. She inhaled deeply and held it as if he would rescind what he had just said.

"You're leaving?"

"Detective, I'm not blind. I see what's going on between you and detective Demming. I'm not one to step on anyone's toes, so I think now is a good time for me to take my leave with whatever dignity I have left."

Knowing that the case has been solved, Rick rose from the chair, extended his hand towards detective Beckett, and made a motion to shake her hand.

She looked at his hand and then up to his face. The second she locked eyes with him her eyes started to mist just a little. She stood up from her desk and faced him then met his hand in the handshake grip. He shook her hand, briefly, and without a great deal of passion or emotion, and released her hand all too soon, well in her mind.

"It's been a pleasure Detective Beckett. And I hope that you able to solve the case that we were never ever able to solve together."

Rick turned and left the homicide floor. He passed Ryan and Esposito on the way out, wearing WTH looks like there was something wrong. He decided to let Kate tell them what she wanted to, as he said he was her show to run in her own way. He stepped out into the lobby and gave Foster the desk sergeant a nod on his way out.

Once outside, he took a deep cleansing breath, trying to cleanse the memories, hurt, and disappointments away. He knew it would take a lot more than this, but he was proud that at least he had taken that huge first step, he had left the source of his heartbreak.

Kate knew what he was talking about when he mentioned the case that she could never solve. She only wished he had stayed to see it to the end, she truly had gotten used to him pulling her pigtails, and perhaps, no this was Richard Freakin Castle, he would never see anything in her she fought her thoughts.

Xx

He decided that writing would be a better use of his time and entered the subway to return home to the loft. Less than an hour later, he was back behind his desk typing up a storm on his laptop. He lost track of time and before he realized, it was almost midnight. He got up from his desk and stretched as was his normal tradition.

His battle with his own thoughts continued, thoughts of her and him together, and if he were being honest with himself, he wanted a shot of whiskey but then decided against it. He needed to be clearheaded when he finished the last Nikki Heat book. A glass of water it is and he headed back to his desk.

He glanced at the floor, apparently an incoming call had caused the vibration, the ring tone was off when he was writing, had vibrated his phone to the floor below the desk. His first thought was that it was probably detective Beckett calling but when he picked up the phone and turned it over, he saw a number he didn't recognize. Just as he was trying to figure out who could be calling him this late at night and from an unknown number no less the phone rang again.

"Hello, Rick Castle."

"Mr. Castle, we need to have a conversation and rather quickly I might add."

Rick pulled his phone away from his ear and looked at the phone as if to ask is this guy is serious.

"Listen mister…. What's your name?"

"There's no need for names right now Mr. Castle. We need to talk. Tomorrow meet me in Washington Square Park near the Hangman's Elm. It's on the East…"

"I know where it is." Rick interrupted.

"Be there at 6 am sharp. No excuses, Mr. Castle. A life hangs in the balance."

Rick wanted to question whose life he was talking about, but the line was dead.