The Legend of Zelda, its characters and locations are all property of Nintendo. Any and all OCs and original locations belong to me unless specifically stated to belong to someone else.

Pride, Prejudice, and Ninjas
Chapter 1 – On Precipitation

This mission sucks, Sheik thought, lying on his stomach in the middle of a thorny bush, the soil underneath muddy from the stupidly frequent rainfalls that seemed to plague this region—the direct opposite of the dry desert he had grown up in.

He thought he'd been clever, choosing this hiding spot, on account of its proximity to his target's camp, giving him a perfect view, but by the time he realised he'd very likely chosen the prickliest damn bush in Hyrule to hide in, it was too late and his target had made himself comfortably in his camp—directly facing Sheik's hiding place. And then the rain had intensified from a slow drip to a full-on deluge.

Thanks to the many barbs that had hooked themselves into his suit, moving was not an option—it'd make enough of a racket to raise the dead, and likely cause the bush itself move. In the dark, he might get away with it...that is, if his target weren't observant to the point Sheik suspected the damned Hylian would find the proverbial needle in the haystack within minutes.

He'd certainly not fail to notice Sheik's clumsy attempt to escape a stupid situation by his own creation.

In other words, he was in it for the long haul tonight. He'd have to wait until the Hylian went to sleep (if he ever did) and make his escape then.

Attacking at that time was an effort in futility—the Hylian was probably the lightest sleeper Sheik had ever seen, including himself. Sheik had the excuse of growing up in a clan of assassins and thieves, where sleeping lightly was a matter of survival. Presumably, the Hylian had his own reasons.

This mission really sucks, he thought, watching the hooded Hylian preparing a campfire, safely hunkered under a rocky outcropping that directed the falling rain away from his shelter. The frying pan was retrieved from its place in the saddlebag, and soon Sheik could hear, even over the loudness of the rain, the sound of sizzling meat. Could smell the cooking food, even.

I fucking hate Akkala, he thought, slowly and deliberately fishing out a paper-wrapped hard biscuit, which was all had left in terms of rations, lowering his cloth mask and biting into the biscuit with the enthusiasm of a man facing the executioner's axe. A man would feel full after a single bite, if only so he wouldn't have to take another.

I fucking hate rain, he thought as the sky above him exploded with thunder and lightning, and the rainfall intensified even further, turning the soil beneath him into even more mud, which began to slither into his clothes and pour into his boots.

He channelled his hatred into the object of his scrutiny, for the hooded and cloaked Hylian currently enjoying his supper seemingly without a care in the world—it was hard to tell, the hood hid most of his face save for the lower part of his chin—while Sheik languished under this prick of a bush. How he longed to run the Hylian through, to smash his head against the rocks, to choke the life out of him...

If he ever got the chance, that is. He'd been following and observing his target for two weeks now and had yet to find an opening to engage. The Hylian was simply too cautious, keeping a careful eye on his surroundings at all times. Which made sense, on account of...well, who the Hylian was, really. And what had happened up until now. It was why Sheik had been sent in the first place.

Or part of why he'd been sent, at least.

"I have a special assignment for you," Kohga said, staring down at the kneeling Sheik. "A test to prove your worth to the clan."

Sheik grinned beneath his porcelain mask, newly painted with the clan symbol—a reversed Sheikah eye, to mark their opposition to the other clan that had degraded themselves in submission to the Hylians—feeling excitement rushing through his veins already. Finally, his chance had come!

"What is the test, master?" he asked, listening to Kohga's footsteps as the large man paced back and forth in front of him, the wood beneath Kohga's feet creaking in protest. "Do you want me to steal something from the Gerudo? Assassinate their chief? Sabotage their water supply? Burn the bazaar?"

Kohga paused. Sheik kept his head bowed, gaze on the floor. The clan leader sighed.

"No, I have other people assigned to those tasks," Kohga said. "Some time ago I communed with Lord Ganon, and he informed me of a newly awakened threat, one we have been asked to dispatch with the utmost urgency."

Sheik nearly choked on his own spit. A mission from Lord Ganon himself?! For Sheik?!

Finally! Finally, his skills were being recognised! Years of training and struggling, of desperately making himself seen and heard, of proving that he was the future of the clan, coming to fruition at last!

"T-Truly?" he asked, unable to stop himself from looking up at his master. "From Lord G-Ganon?"

Kohga nodded, his mask hiding any expression. In all these years, Sheik had never actually seen his master's face. It had always been so—no one ever saw Kohga's true visage. No one really knew why he chose to hide it like this.

"Indeed," Kohga said, his voice amused. "There have been...others who I believed were up to the task, but they have failed. I know you won't, my little firebrand. I know you will not rest until the deed is done."

"I won't, master!" Sheik exclaimed, grinning widely behind his mask, certain that he was positively vibrating with anticipation now. "Please, what is my task?!"

"You are to slay the Hero of Hyrule, the Hylian Champion, who goes by the name of Link," Kohga announced.

Sheik blinked. "I thought he was dead; Slain by Ganon a century ago?"

The questions came flooding out of his mouth before he could even think to stop them. All the stories had said the Hylian Champion had been killed along with the rest, unable to stand up to the might of Lord Ganon, who could only be matched in strength by Princess Zelda—cursed be her name—who was blessed by the Goddess herself.

"As did we," Kohga said, nodding. "But it appears our beloved cousins had a trick up their sleeve: The Shrine of Resurrection. The Hero of Hyrule was placed in it, and he has recently awakened. He must be stopped!"

Sheik clenched his jaw, a rush of anger filling him at the sound of the Sheikah and their tricks! Damn them! He rallied his feelings, however, and focused them all on the rush of words that came to his lips.

"I won't fail you, master! Or Lord Ganon! I will slay him and bring you his head!" Sheik announced, clenching his fists to stop himself from miming how he would strike the Hero's head from his shoulders with one clean stroke! Theatrics could wait!

Kohga made a noise that sounded suspiciously like a snort, but Sheik hardly noticed. He was already thinking up scenarios in his head, of how he would ambush and finish off the Champion before the fool even realised what was happening. He imagined his triumphant return to the clan hideout, of how the others would acknowledge his superiority, at last!

"I know you won't, Sheik," Kohga said, his voice trembling with what Sheik knew was pride, taking him by the arm and bringing him to his feet. "Reyla will fill you in on the details and prepare your equipment. Go see her immediately—you set out at dawn."

Still grinning like a fox in a cuccoo coop, Sheik did as he was told, letting himself be carried along the stone caverns by the sounds of Kohga's excited wheezing.

He'd been so excited, setting out from the cavern hideout and heading north-east, out of the desert. He'd kept close to the mountains, both for the shade they offered and the cover, so as to stay out of sight of Gerudo patrols. Hidden water caches along the way kept him sustained until he finally reached the hidden trail that led him into Hyrule proper, and...into his first obstacle.

How the fuck was he supposed to find the Hero of Hyrule?

Intelligence on the bastard was lacking, and the last anyone had seen of him (that had reached the hideout, anyway) was that he was heading north-east, towards the Zora's Domain. Operatives he'd met along the way had confirmed much the same, and the one thing they'd all told him before he'd kept going was:

"Don't underestimate him."

As if Sheik would make such an elementary mistake! He'd almost berated the operatives he'd met for doing so but figured the various injuries they'd sported would serve as lessons instead. The one useful piece of information they had offered other than the Hero's general direction was that he had quickly learned to see through their disguises.

Idiots.

They'd given away their most important trick already!

He'd given them a piece of his mind regarding that, and afterwards they had been very eager to send him on his way to face the Hero in their stead. Obviously, they believed him far more capable!

The meetings left him with one impression, however:

The Hero was clearly a devious combatant, choosing only to injure and cripple his opponents rather than kill them. Or perhaps he was just too soft-hearted to finish the job properly. It wouldn't surprise Sheik if he were—how else could the Goddess' Chosen have failed a century ago, otherwise?

Yeah, this was going to be a snap.

The others' mistake was that they went for the Hero immediately upon spotting him, instead of waiting and observing, searching for the perfect moment to strike. Everyone had weaknesses, and Sheik would find the Hero's. And then make him pay dearly for what he'd done.

It was all going so well until he reached the Domain and its perpetual rainfall, courtesy of Vah Ruta.

Stupid machine.

Rain was a rare thing to see in the desert, and rarer still was the sort that left every surface slick and impossible to climb as it did in the Domain. He couldn't follow the roads (such as they were) on account of the Zora patrols, and roughing it across the hills and crags offered its own fun sets of obstacles, including the aforementioned slick surfaces that threatened to send him careening down the cliffs and (if he were lucky) into the river below, as well as his own damned supposed allies.

The feral bokoblins and lizalfos that dotted the mountainside was an idiotic bunch, and their alliance with the Yiga was a symbolic one at best, as they seemed to have compunction with attacking Sheik upon spotting him, forcing him to run away like a coward (because only idiots try to face down a numerically superior enemy on uncertain ground).

He'd learned on the third encounter with Lord Ganon's minions, which had ended with him climbing a tree and cursing under his breath as the creatures ran past below, that he was, essentially, on his own in this.

Just as well.

Sharing the glory with their sort was the last thing he wanted anyway.

They fared no better in stopping the Hero, either, if the various skirmish spots Sheik found along the way was any indication. Injured and dead creatures littered the ground, parts of which was pockmarked with what looked like craters caused by explosions. So, the rumours about the Sheikah Slate appeared to be true, at least. Yet another thing Sheik to be careful of, when he found the Hero.

Kohga had requested that Sheik bring the artefact back if (that is, when) he succeeded in slaying the Hero. He would attempt to do so, but Sheik wasn't above destroying the thing if it meant taking away some of the Hero's combat effectiveness.

Because Sheik wasn't an idiot.

He was, however, too slow to catch the Hero before he entered the Zora's city proper, and by then it was too late to ambush him. Sneaking into the city was tantamount to suicide, even with the disguise technique, and so he was forced to make camp on Mount Ploymus, overlooking the city but too far away to do anything.

He thought he'd get his chance when he spotted a cloaked shape that looked about the right size for a Hylian making its way up the mountain, seemingly aiming for the summit.

What business the Hero could have up there was unknown to Sheik, but he wasn't going to waste his chance.

He braved the slippery, perilous cliffs of Ploymus and aimed to reach the summit before the Hero, planning to lie in wait and ambush him there. Surely the last place the Hero would expect a Yiga would be at the top of a fucking mountain?

He was certain It'd have worked, too, if it hadn't been for the lynel.

None of the other Yiga had seen fit to inform him of that grouchy son of a bitch.

Ostensibly another ally, Sheik had tried to communicate with the thing upon spotting it, hoping to borrow some of the lightning arrows that littered its territory, more than aware of how useful they'd be in this weather. He'd even pulled one out of a nearby tree trunk, doing his best to sign that he wished to borrow it.

The first arrow had missed his shoulder by a mere inch, and the next thing he knew, Sheik was running for his life with the thundering hooves of the lynel pounding in his ears, growing louder and louder, sparking arrows flying past his head. There'd been no cover, and by the time Sheik realised he was being herded towards the cliff edge, there was really nowhere else to go.

Of course, he'd known there was a pond right beneath the cliff, just deep enough to allow him to survive the fal—er, graceful dive into it. He could have done without smacking his hip into the rocky bottom of the pond, but what was a little pain considering he'd just walked triumphantly away from a fight with a lynel.

(In his mind, surviving a lynel encounter was a victory in itself).

By the time he'd managed to crawl out of the pond and make his way back to the summit, however, it was all over. He'd heard the thumps of explosions on his way back up, but as he crested the edge, all he found was a dead lynel (an easy target for the Hero now that Sheik had left it exhausted from the chase), no thunder arrows...and a cloaked shape floating through the air on a paraglider, heading back towards the Zora's city.

Sheik had missed his chance.

All because of the stupid horse cat!

Even worse, he'd lost a great deal of his supplies in the fall. He'd seen the last of his bananas go tumbling further down the mountainside, never to be seen again...or picked up by a damned bokoblin, which would just gobble the fucking thing down and fail to appreciate it.

Returning to his camp, he found that the rain had managed to carve its way into the little alcove beneath which he'd pitched his tent, thoroughly soaking the fabric and the rest of his stuff. Tired and soaked to the bone, he could only watch as a battle erupted around the stationary Vah Ruta, bolts of electricity flying through the air. He couldn't see details from this distance, but he could have sworn he saw someone flying through the air, firing little bolts of lightning at the great machine, eventually overcoming its defences and shutting it down.

This was not how Sheik had imagined this would go. He could only hope the guardian Ganon had left within the Beast would be sufficient to stop the Hero. His hopes were dashed when the creature lit up with brilliant blue lights, and the never-ending stream of water issuing from its trunk finally ceased, putting an end to the rain that had made Sheik's journey so miserable.

Couldn't have done that a little sooner, Hero? he thought bitterly as his tent collapsed around him because of the weight of the water.

I hate this place!