Second in my short(possibly) series of Good Omens one-shots.
Disclaimer:Ido not own Good Omens, neither am I affiliated with this amazing book/miniseries. If I were in possession of this franchise, Demons and Angels would all live in peace. And Gabriel would have Fallen.
"Shut your stupid mouth and die already."
Those words had played on loop in Crowley's mind ever since Gabriel had uttered them. The Archangel whom was supposed to be better than the average demon. He was supposed to be better than the Fallen.
The fact that they were planning on utterly destroying the love of his life left Crowley more than furious. What he wanted more than anything was to storm back up to Heaven and show Gabriel just how much of a mistake he made.
He had not told Aziraphale exactly what Gabriel had said to him, he did not want to see the heartbreak in his angel's eyes. Honestly, the angel had done an excellent job acting as him down in Hell. Asking Michael for a towel had been just perfect!
"Shut your stupid mouth and die already."
The demon growled as those seven words played in his mind again. He could not take it anymore! He was going to track that traitorous Archangel down and yell at him. That meant the demon was going to take a little trip…
"I'll be back in a few hours Aziraphale." He said to his angel as he walked out of the bookstore without waiting for a reply. Crowley climbed into his Bentley with a certain destination in mind.
201 Bishopsgate, London.
This was where the main entrance to both Heaven and Hell was located. It was about a twenty minute drive… if the demon were to actually obey the speed limits… Instead Crowley only had roughly six minutes to decide on how he was going to go about this mission of his.
Crowley pushed his Bentley between ninety and a hundred miles per hour as he thought about what exactly he wanted to say to that Archangel.
"Shut your stupid mouth and die already."
The phrase took over his mind as he drove.
"Shut your stupid mouth and die already."
It would not stop. He could not think about how to approach this interaction.
"Shut your stupid mouth and die already."
"Shut your stupid mouth and die already."
"Shut your stupid mouth and die already."
With a growl, Crowley haphazardly parked his Bentley in a parking spot and headed inside Broadgate Tower where he took the right entrance up to Heaven. It was a place he had not stepped a foot in, as himself, since he had Fallen.
The moment he stepped over the threshold, his feet started burning at the same, low level, intensity as when he walked inside that church so many years ago. The demon did not hop from foot to foot this time. No, he sauntered straight to where the Archangels always had gathered. He knew they never changed what part of Heaven they met up in from Aziraphale. Of course his angel did not know that Crowley could remember exactly what he was describing.
His golden snake eyes found Gabriel and smirked. "Gabey! Just the fucking Archangel I'm here to see!" As he talked, the demon allowed his darkened wings to slide out from his body.
Gabriel, whom was actually alone for the first time in what seemed like forever, gaped at the sight of a demon inside Heaven. "That is not possible. Demons burst into flames when they step on consecrated ground or when they try to enter Heaven." He narrowed his eyes and walked towards the demon. Thankfully, he always had a container of Holy Water on hand should he need it.
Crowley smirked at Gabriel. "Oh I know, I once saved Aziraphale from being discorporated inside a church in 1941. Let me tell you, it really does feel like I'm walking on hot sand with bare feet." He knew that he was getting under the Archangel's skin and it was so much fun.
The Archangel pulled out a bottle and opened it. Inside was his personal stock of Holy Water which he immediately threw at the demon. Oh how wonderful it truly would be to get rid of Crowley.
He watched as the Holy Water came at him with a smirk on his face. Then, when his left side was soaked through with the Water he grinned. "You see Gabriel, Holy Water can't kill me." He said in a soft voice as he miracled the liquid off of him then healed the burns that covered his whole side.
Gabriel stumbled away from Crowley, disbelief written plainly upon his face. "That cannot happen… no demon can heal Holy Water burns. It should have destroyed you."
Those last six words reminded Crowley why he was there.
"Shut your stupid mouth and die already."
With a snarl, the demon stormed towards Gabriel. "I should kill you Gabey!" He grabbed ahold of that grey suit jacket and snarled at the angel. He did not deserve to be referred to as an Archangel anymore, in his opinion.
Gabriel huffed. "Now really demon, you can't kill an Archangel." He said snidely. Only another Archangel could harm him.
Crowley smirked as he scratched the cheek of the angel, then watched as blood rose to the surface and fell in ruby red tears. "Really, I thought you would be smarter than that. I used to be the Archangel FUCKING RAPHAEL!" His God given name caused brief pain to flood his nervous system, but really, it was worth it to see the dumbfounded look on Gabriel's face.
"B...but he died…" Gabriel's knees gave out as he crashed to the ground, but really it made some semblance of sense. Only Raphael could possibly have healed the demon from the destructive powers of Holy Water. Only Raphael ever could get away with calling him Gabey. Only a Fallen Archangel could step within Heaven again without burning to a crisp. Only an Archangel could harm another Archangel. Finally there were only two Archangels whom were missing from their ranks. Lucifer, who had Fallen, and Raphael, who had been presumed dead after the first war. Gabriel found himself shaken violently from his thoughts as he was lifted by his suit jacket.
"Now Gabriel, on to why I am here…" His eyes narrowed in rage. "How dare you try to destroy MY ANGEL?!" He threw Gabriel away from him as hard as he could. "How dare you condemn him to destruction by Hell Fire!" The angel landed halfway across the enormous room. "How dare you call him a TRAITOR when he is the PUREST of you ALL!" Crowley stalked over to where the angel had landed and knelt down to whisper in his ear. "You know, if She was still keeping a closer eye on things, you would have been punished. The destruction of a fellow Angel was always one of the very few things She commanded never to happen." The demon's voice had calmed a considerable amount, as evident by his lack of hissing.
Gabriel grunted as he landed on the hard floor halfway across the room from the enraged demon. For the first time, he really could see that this Crowley was what remained of his best friend. The brother he always looked up to. The one who kept the peace between the Archangels. "We did what we thought was right. You two stopped the apocalypse from happening! Do you know how hard it was for us to get the angels and demons to stand down?"
Crowley stood up and walked away from Gabriel. "Why should that matter? You would sentence seven and a half billion people to death just to settle a grudge between Michael and Lucifer!" He shook his head and ran his fingers through his hair. "They really aren't all that different from us, Gabriel. They just don't live as long. They are capable of great good and great evil." He turned towards the angel. "Just… stay away from Aziraphale." His golden snake eyes held so much sadness in them for a brief moment before they hardened. "If you dare try to hurt him again, I'll come back up here and destroy you." He smirked at the angel. "And it won't be a quick and painless death either."
With that the demon sauntered back the way he had came in and exited Heaven. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a pair of his favored sunglasses. Then placed them on his face as he climbed into his Bentley and drove back home to his angel.