Luan's Fight

Chapter 1 — Depression and Tears

...

Regret...

Sadness...

Fear...

These feelings are how we can describe Luan's emotions. She's actually laying on her bed. She was with red eyes from crying and for not sleeping and her hair was messy. In her shirt, there isn't her typical flower. In her room, apart from her roommate's things, school things and a laptop, there was nothing of comedy. I mean, apart from Luan's puppet, that now have normal clothes, not the funny ones, and that is turned to the wall, there is nothing that we can remember from comedy. Nothing...

With this, you may ask: What happened? Why Luan was like this? And why some of her things aren't there?

Well... The truth is very hurtful to hear since the reason it's actually her fault. But not on purpose. You will understand when you discover everything by going back in time.

/Rewind.../

It all started exactly 1 week ago on a Saturday. And that day was 1st April soo everyone knows what happens always that day: Luan's Prank Apocalypse. Nobody without exception can escape from, at least one of her pranks. Every time she does these pranks, in days before, she always planned what pranks will make and cut the ones that wouldn't be safe and remake them to avoid incidents. But on that day, one of the pranks that she remade, end up hurting one of her siblings:

Lincoln Loud

The only boy of the family was sent to the hospital thanks to one of the pranks. For respect, let's not say what was it but whatever it is, was very harmful. At the hospital, he was in a coma and the doctor revealed to the family that he would turn paraplegic, where it means that will never walk again.

Luan was pretty much grounded due to the accident, by being banned from doing pranks and even of doing comedy. She was scolded for everyone except by one sister that will be a secret for now.

But one thing that nobody knew was that she was pretty regretted due to her actions and thanks to that yelling...

She feels hated...

The depression comes to the door and after all of the comedy things be out of her room, Luan was crying in her pillow. Everyone, except that person that is in secret, thought that was temporary. They didn't hate her but yes they were angry with her. However, Luan thinks that they hate her.

With that, things just got worse in the next days.

On Sunday, she didn't bother to get out of her room and didn't try to talk to anyone. Her feelings were at a new level of depression. She still ate but ignored any call of attention.

At school, on Monday, she faked her feelings to nobody worry and... it worked. But she didn't bother to eat at school. She didn't feel like to lunch since she has a knot on the stomach. The same things happen on Tuesday and Wednesday. At the house, she got worse. Any event of her family was ignored. She only looked with a blank face by the window and nobody tried to talk with her except one but was always stopped by the others.

At Thursday, the emotions got into a rock bottom.

Luan didn't fake anymore any of the emotions that she had and was always sad. A part of her classmates, that they were real friends to her, tried to figure out what is happening but no use. She said that was fine but that was surely a total lie. In the start, was just worry but in the third class, that was enough. The parents, Rita and Lynn Sr. (Like you don't know them), were called by a teacher to pick up Luan at school due to the signs of depression. At this news, they got shocked and concerned.

When Luan reached home, she was going to barricade in her room. However, when she was about going upstairs, her mom tried to have a talk and put her hand on the daughter's shoulder to get attention but Luan ends up flinching of fear at that and Rita rewind from her action. Her daughter goes to her room and cries, for the nineteenth time, in her bed. Now the parents are more worried about what was happening to her.

The rest of the week, until the present, was the limit of the depression. She didn't get out of her room except to do her service in the bathroom. Luan didn't eat, didn't drink or let anyone in her room even Luna, her roommate. Luan was having depressive thoughts about the last days and about her life. She was worth something? Does she deserve to have a future? She deserves to even... live? The questions didn't get out of her head and end up "encouraging" her to the last level of depression. To the one that even the writer doesn't have the courage to write for the readers read. While it happens, everyone knew what is happening with her and tried to talk to her but it was too late... Too late...

/Present.../

Now we are in the present day. While the clouds get bigger on the sky, Luan sits on her bed, now thinking about what to do next. She should do it? She shall give up? She shall stop mopping around to not annoy anyone?

Yes... For her mind, damaged by her sadness and depression, was a total yes... Almost everyone hates her. Almost killing someone was the worst that can happen. It's the most obvious in the world. Why bother dealing with the doubts anymore because of a question with the obvious answer, for her depressed mind? It's very stupid to bother anymore for her.

It was useless too. Everyone will be happy about what will happen next. Why? Because she won't be a burden to anybody. Almost anyone will forget and/or not care about her. Hating was the only thing Luan thinks that her family, except one, feels against her. But one thing that she doesn't know, is that she is far from the real truth...

Luan (Whispering): I think that it's time... I give up... I can't take this anymore... (inhale and exhale her breath) My sister... You were the only that cared for me in this dark week. I hope you understand why I did this...

After she finishes her whispering, Luan gets up and walks to her desk. She sits in a chair, take a pen and open a yellow book that is titled "Diary of Luan". She kept her memories and thoughts there. It's the fifth diary of her life where the first was written when Luan was 9 years after her mom bought it for her anniversary. She may look too young for it, at the time, but since these times, she had an interest in keeping her secrets and thoughts in a special book. She sees people doing it. Why not do it too? It... was something... That was... The real last frontier of privacy for her. If it turns broken, it turns impossible to have privacy. To avoid it, she always keeps it safe to avoid someone, especially Lola, snoops there. I mean... Until these last days that she never added any entry... Until now...

Luan writes her new and last entry slowly with tears falling on the paper and when she was done, she gets up, with the diary a little wet, takes the camera, that she still had on her desk, and gets out of the room slowly with her head down.

Everything was empty. Luckily, her family had gone to the park to have fun, so there wasn't any type of interruptions. I mean... For her depressive state was lucky...

She goes downstairs, gets to the tv from the living room and plugs her camera to it. At the time she almost put her finger on one of the camera's buttons to record...

Luan (Barely a whisper and silently crying): I hope this message doesn't be ignored... It's for the best. To they know my last words before I go...

Minutes of silence passed after that she barely whispers to herself. Luan didn't move from her current position. Until she remembers one last thing to do.

Luan: Of course! Need to turn on the tv.

And she did what remembered. The last actions that we can see from inside of that house, was of she clicking the recording button of the camera, sit on the sofa and when she was about to speak, with her mouth opening, our vision turns black. And I grant that is not good news. I promise that!

/Time Skip/

A certain van appears in the streets, near to the Loud House. There was everything that you always could see: Yelling, throwing up for texting and even a fight of the twins for one not stopping looking at the other. The parents didn't bother at that since nobody hurts by these all actions. The same persons were thinking about Luan, since she changed very much last days to the bad side, especially after picking her up from school, last Thursday. Worry dominated them and even that they were angry at her, doesn't mean that they wouldn't care. It's like a parent is always: Not stop from loving one of their children for anything, even that she or he did something very bad on the criminal meaning. Even that Luan didn't feel that.

But... They weren't the only ones that worry about her.

Leni wasn't feeling dotty for being in a car that is moving like she always is. Every time that we look to her seat, she is just looking at the window with a sad face. She may not be smart at the understanding of what they meant when the phrase or word is with a figurative meaning. But she always understood the feelings and what is happening to anybody. For her, it's the meaning of life. One thing that she couldn't take out of her mind was Luan.

Leni was the sister that Luan thought that knew that still loved her. Leni was the one that wasn't angry at her. I mean... She is but not at the point of looking that doesn't love her anymore. Leni knew, since after the incident, that Luan was into depression. She always tried to cheer her up or to talk to her to the depression vanishes to the sky, let's say in that way. But nobody of her family let her do it, saying that she doesn't deserve empathy. And how much that was a mistake. And how much Leni was annoyed at that impossibility.

Her thoughts, about the ex-comedian, were interrupted by Lori tapping on her shoulder to get attention. With that, the fashion girl flinches and looks at her.

Leni: Huh? What?

Lori: You're ok? You look... like someone died...

Leni (Creates a fake smile): Nothing... just bored...

Lori: Oh ok...

Lori goes back to her phone, to see the new social media posts, while Leni looked back to the window, drop out the smile and resumed her thoughts.

Leni (Thinking): Sigh... I feel bad for Luan... She didn't know that the incident would happen and everybody is angry at her like she did on purpose. Sigh... I hope this changes... soon...

After the last word of her thinking, the family reaches their house. When the dad of the family stop what they call of "Vanzilla", everybody gets out. Now we can see another person worried:

Luna...

She was listening to music on the entire ride but she couldn't sing. Why? Luan's behavior dominated her worries. She was angry at her? Yes... But when she ignored everyone, it was strange for the purple girl. And those feelings were totally seen by her when she was "kicked out" of her room by Luan, her roommate. Luna regretted these actions and was trying to think a way to talk to her, without her ignoring... But was impossible for her. Nothing gets out of her rocking brain... Unfortunately...

Everybody got to the door and Rita opens it with the house's key. Inside, they were going to do their own things, until something is seen, in the living room... something that shouldn't probably be there...

A camera...

With that, everyone was confused at that.

Lynn Jr.: What in the world is doing that camera here?

Lola: Yeah! This shouldn't be here!

Lisa (Notices something): And I think that you didn't notice the paper that is there.

Everyone take a look at the camera again and Lisa's sentence was not false... THERE is a paper on the camera. With that, Lola ends up taking that and gives it to Lynn Sr., since she had difficulty in reading. The paper was a note saying, with the dad reading aloud and clear:

Play me...

Signed the one that hurt someone...

Luan...

At those words, everybody was surprised. Then Lori turns the face to an annoyed one.

Lori: Really? This should be literally Luan breaking the grounding.

Rita (Starting to get angry): You're right... I can't believe that she faked everything!

The only person that had a different opinion was the second oldest sibling. She picked the note from her dad's hands, not without asking for it first, and noted that was wet due to... Tears? Maybe? It's impossible to reach clearly to that conclusion.

Leni (Raising an eyebrow): I don't think that is true, Lori.

Lori (Rolling the eyes): Let's just get over it!!

Without sitting on the couch, everyone was in front of the tv, to watch what in the world that could be. At that, Lori clicks at the play button of the camera.

But what they end up watching, was the most heartbreaking moment ever.

As the recording starts, we see Luan sitting on the sofa, looking to the camera. She was like you had seen before: Red eyes of crying, messy hair and... tired. The silence was heard for 1 minute and after that, Luan opens her mouth to talk.

Luan: My name is Luan Loud, 14 years old, ex—comedian. If you're seeing this, you won't hear me anymore after that. (Breaths in and out) At 1st April, I hurt my only brother: Lincoln. Thanks to my distraction and stupidity on planning the prank, I end up making him into a coma and to never walk again in his life. After that, my family... hated me... but... I can't censor them... I deserve it... I could have... killed him! This is something that nobody can forgive... Sigh... (Starts to cry again) I... I can't... I can't take this anymore! (Snuffles) Now it's 1 week after the incident and now I'm worse emotionally. Now... I don't want to eat... drink... sleep... get out... breathe... Sniff... I think its time... I hope you forget me... Because of you... Sniff... Not loving me anymore. And... (Realizes that have nothing more to say) That's it... Record of Luan Loud, 14 years old, ex—comedian...

After these words, she gets up and when was about to turn the camera on...

Luan: Leni... my sister... If you are watching this... Sorry for not overpast this... You're the only person that doesn't hate me... I hope you understand...

The recording ends.

When the video ended, we can see the effect that had given to the family. Most of them were with mouths open and everyone with wide eyes. Leni and Luna were almost about crying and the mom of the family was with the mouth covered by her hands, while the eyes had 2 tiny tears. What we can expect? Not to be rude but it was the most obvious. Now they knew what was happening. Killing himself/herself can't be a prank.

Rita: Oh...

Leni: My...

Luna: God...

Lynn Sr.: This...

Lori: Is not a...

Lynn Jr and Lola: Prank...

At that, the mom of the family gets up fast, as her tears fall from her cheeks.

Rita: EVERYBODY TURN THE HOUSE UPSIDE DOWN! WE NEED TO STOP HER!

At those words, everyone runs to all parts of the house to try to find Luan. At the same time, Rita takes the phone and dials 911. And in seconds, the number was attended.

Phone Operator: 911, what's your emergency?

Rita (Crying): PLEASE SOMEONE COME TO 1216 FRANKLIN AVENUE! MY DAUGHTER IS TRYING TO KILL HERSELF!

At the same time, the same daughter is crying more in the bathroom. She was looking to the mirror, holding the sink in front of her. She couldn't take this anymore. Was now the time. Her voice in her head is saying to do it! She inhales and exhales before she takes the sleeping pills, that recently Lynn Jr takes, to not be excited and finally sleep, after a couple of minutes of laying on the bed to sleep. At that, she tried to open but that was very closed! How?

Luan (Struggling): Gnn... Come on...

Meanwhile, at the only hall of the house, Luna, Leni and Lynn Jr were entering on all rooms except the bathroom to find Luan but no use. She, at least for them, run away.

Leni (Almost starting to form tears): NO! She's gone...

Luna (Hugs her): Calm down sis...

Lynn Jr.: Don't worry... We will find her...

Gnnn...*

Leni (Still almost crying): At least... I hear her voice in my head as my memory...

Luna and Lynn Jr (Shocked): Wait... what?

Gnnnnnnnnn...*

The three siblings look to where the sound was heard: the bathroom. At that, they run to there and Lynn Jr opens the door, with her foot. After that, they couldn't believe at their sight.

They see Luan, out of reality, trying to open Lynn Jr's pills. The owner of the medication ends up recognizing the pills fast.

Luan: Come on... Why... This... Doesn't open... Up...

Lynn Jr (Yelling, with worry): NOOOOOOO!!!!!

Lynn Jr gets her hands on the pills and tries to take them from Luan's hands but, at the same time, Luan comes back to reality and holds strongly at it.

Luan: NOOOOO! GET YOUR HANDS OFF!

Her voice spread to all the street and the rest of the family, that was in the yard, recognized and run to the inside of the house.

Leni and Luan help Lynn Jr, to take the pills to far away and Luan still firmly holds them, with tears falling again from her eyes. After seconds, the pills slip from their hands and fall to the floor, opening it and let the medication inside, get out from the recipient. Luan was now shocked at that moment and, with sadness dominating the mind, she yelled.

Luan: WHY YOU DID THAT FOR?!?!?

This was the moment: Luan breakdown in tears and falls on her knees. Leni reached to her, sits on the floor and holds her to put the head, on her knee. Luan was crying like there was no tomorrow and saying the same words again and again:

Luan (Out from reality): I want to die...

At the same time, the paramedics reached fast and enter the house by the front door, that was still open by Rita.

Paramedic: Where's the patient?

Rita and Lynn Sr. (Going upstairs and pointing there): Up there!

They run to the first floor and see the climax of the moment: Luan is crying, Leni tries to calm her down, Luna almost breakdown too in tears and Lynn Jr. is shocked. The rest of the family was downstairs, with regret faces and Lily cries too.

In her vision, Luan sees everything in slow—motion and blurry, not knowing who got upstairs too. Then, everything fades to black for her due to a certain pain...

/Chapter's End/

Hey guys! JMbuilder here! I'm very happy for you to finish this chapter.

There are people that claim that the plot is similar to two other stories. I admit that I got the idea and inspired by one of the stories (Luan Goes Too Far). But, as I said in Lincoln's Therapy, I try to make things different by changing some aspects that would not make the story work and be more in my way and more original.

Also, the scene of Luan trying to kill herself was inspired by another scene on the tv film Cyberbully (2011). Even that the reason why Luan did it was different from the main character (That the reason, you can think what is by the title), I was shocked at the scene and I knew that is PERFECT for this fanfic.

Now I need to go! Bye!