A/N:
Okay, so. This entire story came about because of this strong image that I had in my mind of Lucy standing in the rain. It bugged me because I couldn't figure out why she was standing out there. If you guys write yourselves, you know what I'm talking about.
Anyway- All aboard the good ship Nalu. As always, not my sandbox, just my castle.
Reviews are love. I believe Gale will be next chapter.
The Problem With Soulmates
Nalu- One Hundred Thousand Pieces
Lucy lay in bed, watching the storm war with itself outside her window. Raindrops raced down the pane.
Natsu was still awake.
He was quiet on the couch, a silent figure in the dark, but she knew anyway.
And she knew that he knew that she knew.
The thought made her giggle. She tried to muffle it in her blanket. Making a noise felt like losing the silent war they'd been engaged in since since she'd gotten back to her apartment to find him already on her couch, pretending to be asleep.
She kept waiting, either for him to tell her what was wrong or for him to work it out himself and actually fall asleep, but it had been hours now, and his silence was starting to crawl across her skin.
Nope.
Enough was enough.
She sighed, climbing out of the bed. She shivered when her feet touched the cold floor.
"Yeek!" She squealed, hopping over the back of the couch, landing on her partner, dislodging Happy in the process.
She was setting herself up for a fat joke since the exceed was now also awake, but she'd take a critical hit if it got Natsu talking.
He yelped in surprise as Happy went flying, showing just how lost in thought he had been. He should have easily guessed her intentions from the sounds of her movements. He reacted instantly, however, catching her hips before she tumbled off him.
"Sheesh, Luce. A little warning next time." He grumbled, hands warm against her skin.
She forced herself not to think about that.
"Yeah, Lushi. You nearly squished me to death." Happy complained, floating over to settle on the back of her sofa.
She just snorted at them. Anyone else in the world would have started with "Why are you jumping on me in the middle of the night?"
Nope. Not Natsu.
She kinda loved that about him.
"Budge over." She commanded, scooting down to the end of the couch where his feet had been. Obediently, he pulled his feet up, and she settled against the arm, scooting under the blanket.
"Did the storm scare ya?" Natsu asked.
She couldn't see his face in the darkness, but she she could hear the faint traces of teasing mischief.
Better.
"Natsu..?" She sang his name quietly.
"What?" He asked, a flash of lightning momentarily illuminating his face.
"Natsuuu.." She sang again, drawing the word out on purpose. Grinning in the dark, she wriggled her toes under his thigh.
Springtime was cold Magnolia.
He inhaled sharply, and she giggled again as he yanked her feet out from under his leg, settling them in his lap instead. She sighed happily as he settled his hand on them and a slow heat began to envelope them.
"Got cold?" He guessed. She shrugged, figuring his dragon sight could pick it out even in the darkness.
"Just a bonus." She replied. For all that he grumbled about her using him as a space heater, she had the feeling it didn't really bother him most of the time.
"So what's wrong." He asked tiredly.
"You tell me." She said, resting her chin on her knees.
He stilled. "I don't know what you mean."
She snorted. "You're about as good a liar as Virgo."
She could just barely make his profile out, but she could picture the face he was making. She'd thought about turning up the lacrima, but she knew from experience some things were easier to say in the dark.
He sighed, absently rubbing his hand up and down her foot.
"Natsu?" She asked, starting to get worried.
He only got silent when things were serious.
The tone of her voice must have given away her growing concern.
"I'm okay." He murmured. "It's just, that book everyone was talking about..."
He trailed off and she frowned. He was worked up over the soul mate book?
"What about it?" She pressed, trying to understand.
"Lucy..." He stopped.
Her stomach dropped. Something was wrong...
"Hey, what is it?" She asked.
"Do you think...do you think I have a soul?" He said in rush, the words tangling over themselves like he'd had trouble keeping them in order.
Her jaw dropping, she just stared at him.
Then she started laughing.
And laughing.
And laughing.
"It isn't funny!" He said, closing his hand around her foot in emphasis.
"Lucy, Natsu is being serious." Happy scolded.
"Sorry..." She gasped, wiping the tears from her face. "I'm sorry. I just...never heard anything so ridiculous in my life."
"Worrying about the state of my soul is ridiculous?" Natsu asked sourly.
"No." She said in surprise. "Of course not. I think everyone worries about the state of their soul on occasion. But that's not what you said. You asked if I thought you had one. Of course you do. That's what's ridiculous."
He turned to face her. "How can you say it like that. Like you're so sure?"
She shook her head. "I don't even understand the question. Of course we have souls."
"You might have a soul. But me? Zeref created me using a dead body and a demon seed. Then Igneel taught me slayer magic, which created a dragon seed. And then he stuck his own soul inside me. I'm created. How can I have a soul. Hell, Lucy, a part of me used to be a book!" He cried in agitation.
"Yeah, Natsu. A book I'm pretty familiar with." Lucy pointed out.
"Are you saying you wrote me a soul?" He asked lowly, tension threading his words.
"Natsu, no. Of course not." She sighed.
"You have always had a soul. What I meant was, when I was re-writing END, I could...see it. You have so much soul inside you it was bursting off the pages. The stuff I wrote, it was history and memories, things that were in danger of being lost during your battle. But I didn't give you your soul. I just described it. Your thoughts, your emotions, your choices, they're all just proof of your soul. It's always been there. You choseit, when you chose to be human. At best, I was just... recording your soul." She said earnestly.
"I was created, Lucy. How can anything created have a soul?" The anguish was evident in his voice.
She reached out, placing her hand on his shoulder.
"Natsu, we're all created one way or another. Just because your existence didn't come into being like mine doesn't make you any less human. You have a human soul, for no other reason than because you chose to." She said firmly.
"I believe in your soul." Happy said forlornly.
He was quiet for a long time, long enough to remind her of her own thoughts back at the guild hall.
"Natsu, if I have a soul, then you have a soul. There's not a single doubt in my mind. Though sometimes I wish I didn't." She said lowly.
Damn.
She hadn't meant to say that part.
"Lucy?" He asked.
She smiled sadly in the dark. He was sharp, so sharp it was scary.
"Lucy..." Happy had been mostly silent until this point. "Why did you look so sad at the guildhall when you said soulmates probably existed?"
She sighed. "It's stupid.
Natsu tugged her foot gently. "Oy, is it my turn to jump on you?"
She grimaced. Natsu was freaking heavy.
"It's just, the whole idea of soul mates. It's just another form of destiny, right? Like the universe knows what's best for you so it made this big huge decision on your behalf. I don't want anyone else's choice, not even the universe or whoever decides soul mates."
"Huh?" Natsu sounded totally lost.
"I don't get it." Happy admitted.
"It's like, my Dad. He had this whole idea of what my destiny was going to be, and what form my happiness should take and it nearly got the guild destroyed. In Edolas, I get tossed out of the window because Queen Chalet declared it was my destiny. And then the Oracion Seis kidnap me because I'm one of the last remaining Celestial Wizards and they decide it's my destiny to become a piece of the Infinity Clock. And then we go to the Grand Magic Games, and the Princess has me thrown into the dungeons because she says it's my destiny to openthe Eclipse Gate. Then Future Rogue tried to kill me because it's supposedly my destiny to closethe Eclipse Gate. And on and on it goes." She was getting herself worked up now.
"And no one ever asks me my opinion about my so-called 'destiny'. " She added. "And I don't want it. Not any of it. No soul mate. No predetermined destiny. But it's like I can't escape it."
"Lucy." Natsu's voice was comforting.
"You starting creating your own destiny when you left home."
She snorted bitterly. "Yeah, you think? Except it was Anna who opened the gate for you guys 400 years ago, and my Mom who opened it at this end, right?"
"Yeah..." Natsu agreed cautiously. She could feel the tension in him when she mentioned her Mom.
"So I run away from home, and who do I meet? Natsu, you were shot across the sky like a friggin shooting star seven years before, and within weeks of my leaving home, I meet you. I'm an author and even I couldn't write a story that makes a good argument for those kinds of coincidences." She stated baldly.
"Are you...sorry we met?" He asked.
"Gods, Natsu. That's not what I mean. I've never been more thankful for anything in my life than I am for meeting you, for coming to Fairy Tail. But it feels like destiny. And I'm just..." She trailed off, throat tight.
"What Lucy?" His voice was soft now.
"I'm scared, Natsu. I'm so damned scared. I don't want anyone else's idea of a destiny. I want to make my own. I want to choose my own happiness." Her voice was anguished.
Destiny had controlled the women in her family for hundreds of years.
"Hey." His voice was dead serious as he tugged her foot hard, pulling her half into his lap. Startled, she grabbed his shoulder for balance.
"I've said it before, and I'll say it again. No one is going to push a destiny on you that you don't want. Anyone who tries, I'll smash their stupid destiny just like I did before. No one is going to use you. No one is going to take your choices away. I'll break your destiny into a hundred thousand pieces just like I did that damn eclipse gate. As many times as it takes. Anyone who tries, I'll turn'em into dust." He vowed.
His hand was hot, nearly burning as it collared her ankle, but instead of hurting, it felt good. It felt like she was chained to him, in thismoment, in thisplace, with him.
Lucy stared at his shadowed face.
"Even if it's my soul mate?" She whispered.
"Aye, I'll smash him into pieces too." He promised, a grin in his voice.
He placed his forehead against hers.
"Don't be scared Lucy. I won't let anyone take your choices from you."
Her heart pounded in her chest so hard Natsu could probably hear it. She licked her lips.
"Promise?" She asked, blinking back tears.
" 'Course I do. You wrote my soul, remember?" She could hear the smile in his voice.
She groaned. "Natsu, I told you. I didn't write your soul. I just...wrote it down for you."
She felt him shrug. "Probably better that way."
"Yeah, Natsu's handwriting is awful."
Happy added.
Helplessly, she began to giggle.
"Ok, ok. Then from now on, I'll handle souls and you handle destinies." She offered.
"Works for me." Natsu said, then yawned.
"So...can I sleep in your bed tonight? Just in case a destiny attacks you in your sleep.
"I don't think it works that way..." She desperately tried to make her voice stern.
But her heart was still pounding as his words repeated in her head.
Most girls dreamt of being a princess, but she had, for all intents and purposes, been one.
And honestly, the only thing she had ever yearned for was right here.
"Yeah, okay." She agreed quietly.
"Really?" She felt his surprise.
"Yay!" Happy cheered as he floated towards her bed.
"Yeah, really. But just this once." She warned.
But really, who was she warning?
0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0
"Lucy, come on! I'm starving!" Natsu whined from outside her bathroom door.
Lucy made a face at herself in the mirror. No matter what she did, her hair just wouldn't behave. She could just leave it down...
"Lucy, enough. It's gonna start storming again any minute. Happy already flew in ahead. Let's get to the guild so we can eat!" Natsu banged on the door for emphasis this time, caused her to jump and lose her grip on the handful of hair she'd been attempting to corral with her hair ribbon.
"For goodness sake..." She muttered to herself, dropping her arms.
Marching over to the door, she wrenched it open. "Just go ahead without me!"
Natsu wrinkled his nose at her. "What's the hold up? You look fine with your hair down. You always have. Let's go!"
He grabbed her wrist, tearing towards the door. If she hadn't been so used to it by now, she'd have never managed to snag her jacket and wallet on the way out the door.
"Slow down, Natsu!" She said, laughing despite herself. It was as if all the solemnity of the night before had never happened.
Almost.
Natsu's grip on her wrist only tightened, and she nearly flew behind him as he charged down the stairs.
"Okay, okay. Enough." She laughed as she managed to finally wrest her wrist from his grip.
The morning was grey and grim, more rain threatening to fall any moment. It probably was a good thing they'd headed out when they had.
A cool wind gusted around them, and she pulled her jacket closer. Natsu was starting to put distance between them without even realizing it, intent on his thoughts of breakfast.
She walked at a slower pace, picking her away around the large puddles and potholes. The streets were definitely improving, but there was still plenty of evidence of the attack from the Alvarez Empire.
Natsu was nearly half a block ahead of her when the feeling hit. She was halfway across an intersection, foot traffic and wagons moving past her like a sluggish river.
It was strong, so strong she nearly stumbled, a gasp falling from her lips.
What...was that?
She stopped where she was, looking around in bewilderment.
Where was it?
No.
What was it?
Goosebumps broke out on her skin as she unconsciously wrapped her arms around herself.
This feeling...
This isn't what I want.
It wasn't a bad feeling, but neither was it comfortable. It was like she'd been hit by quiet lightening, the strands of her hair dancing in the air around her.
Apprehension slid through her veins. She felt electrified. Her breathing quickened. She stared blankly down the street in the direction they'd just come from.
There.
She didn't feel the cool rain as it began to fall around her.
0-0-0-0-0-0
Reichard Ashley, Duke of Jellal, sighed in irritation as he climbed back into his carriage.
"Only a few more moments, and the driver should have the wheel unstuck." He reassured the two children inside.
He smiled in affection as he watched his oldest examine the small silver key in her hand.
"And this key will summon the funny doggie?" Sora asked him skeptically.
He chuckled. "Yes, once you learn the proper spell to summon him."
His youngest crawled into his lap. "How do you know about the doggie, Papa?" Liesel asked.
"I learned about it a long time ago. Before I met your mother, my father wanted me to marry the daughter of a business associate." He replied, ruffling her hair fondly.
"I didn't know anything about her, other than the fact that she used magic like that. So I tried to learn about it, so we'd have something in common." He explained.
"Did you love her?" Sora asked with wide eyes. Liesel's lip began to tremble.
"No. I never even met her. She refused the match outright. She ran away with a fire wizard, from what I remember." He consoled them.
He remembered more than that, of course. He remembered her portrait, the one sent to their mansion by her father Jude. He remembered the way way her smile had lit up the canvas like she knew a secret.
He'd remembered his shock staring at her seven years later at the Grand Magic Games.
He had never know what Guild she'd joined after declining their match.
"Do you wish she hadn't run away?" Liesel asked, sticking her thumb in her mouth.
"Never." He said with certainty. "Because then I would never have married the most beautiful woman in the world-"
"Mama!" Sora interjected with authority.
"That's right. And I would never have had the two most perfect daughters in the whole world." He grinned at them affectionately.
"Us!" Liesel cheered.
"You!" Reichard agreed, hugging her close.
0-0-0-0-0-0
It was her gasp that had him turning around. The street was noisy, but a part of him was always listening for Lucy, whether in battle or simply in the guildhall.
It had been the reason he'd been able to understand her during the first match of the Grand Magic Games, and it served him well now.
She was in the middle of the street, staring at something he couldn't see. He couldn't tell what it was, but everything about her body language screamed distress.
He didn't like it.
He was at her side in an instant, but she didn't seem to notice him. There was a faraway look in her eyes, like when she was summoning.
Like she was a thousand miles away from him.
He didn't like it.
He looked around, searching with both sight and scent for any threat.
He couldn't sense any magic, so he didn't think she was talking to her spirits through her keys.
But something had upset her. She didn't seem to notice the rain as it began pelting them in sheets.
Where are you Lucy?
She was gripping her own arms so tightly she would have left marks had she not been wearing a jacket.
He reached out for her instinctively-
Come back to me...
She gasped when he touched her shoulder, whirling to face him.
Her eyes were wide, wet bangs straggling in her face as the wind gusted around them.
Her skirt billowed and his scarf danced around them as she smiled at him suddenly, like a spell breaking.
And the entire world stopped for a moment.
His whole life, for as long as he could remember, he'd been in motion.
Searching, fighting, training, wandering.
He was fire, and fire was motion, and that had always made sense.
But looking into Lucy's eyes as she searched his back, everything in him just stopped.
She blinked, and world came slamming back, noise and sensation, his breath racing through his veins, his heart pounding in his chest.
"Natsu-" She began, sounding slightly bewildered.
"I lied." He interrupted, cutting her off.
No more pretending.
Then he grabbed her shoulders, pulling her flush against his chest.
And then he kissed her.
0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0
Natsu kissed her, and everything stopped.
Her panic and confusion slid away, chased by his warmth. Her arms relaxed, first dropping to her side, then rising again, clutching the fabric of his tunic.
Natsu was kissing her.
Oh, Mavis...
It was everything, every stupid little thing she'd never been brave enough to ask for.
He was everything, overwhelming her senses, and she tilted her head back without hesitation.
He pulled her closer as he deepened the kiss, and she couldn't feel the rain or the wind.
Only her heartbeat and Natsu, and maybe they were the same thing anyway.
When he finally broke the kiss, he didn't release her.
She knew she should be embarrassed.
That was her first kiss, and good gods, they were in the middle of traffic and-
She didn't give a damn.
She smiled at him again. She felt it breaking across her face like sunrise.
"I lied." He said raggedly, and her smile faltered.
"Natsu?" She whispered.
He shook his head, looking around them, and for the first time, the presence of the crowd filtered through to her.
She looked around, cheeks flaming.
Something warm draped itself around her shoulders, and she looked back at Natsu.
Her mouth dropped open as she realized he was wrapping his scarf around her.
"Natsu?" She asked again, reaching up to touch the warm fabric. It smelled like him, and it was dry, despite the gusting rain.
"Come on." He tugged a section of the scarf over her head, making a hood of sorts, before grabbing her hand and pulling her out of the market at breakneck speed.
It was all she could do to keep up with him as she clutched the scarf in her other hand, holding it in place, terrified she'd lose the precious heirloom.
She couldn't figure out where they were going, but Natsu seemed sure, so she focused on following him.
He stopped so suddenly she almost ran into his back, the scarf falling down around her neck.
She looked around. They were on a small side road that entered Magnolia on the east end. There was a creek nearby, and he'd pulled them under the boughs of a huge weeping willow. It was sweeping and enormous, the branches falling around them like a cloak, isolated them from the world. Even the rain wasn't making it through.
"Natsu, what is-" She began, but he cut her off again.
"I lied. Last night." His words were excited, but also somehow...weighted.
Sure. Solid.
Certain.
"When I told you I'd smash all your destinies. Because I can't." He shook his head. "Nah, That's not right. I won't."
She shook her head, completely confused.
She opened her mouth, but he didn't give her a chance.
"This is the road I was on when I heard about Salamander being spotted in Hargeon, Lucy. I went there looking for Igneel, but I found you. And maybe you're right. Maybe it's destiny. And if it was, you'll just have to bear it. Because.." He stopped, looking at her with pleading eyes.
"No.." She whispered, moving forward immediately. "Shhh" She covered his mouth with her hand, and he reached up, grabbing her hand.
"You're not my destiny, Natsu. You're my choice. You have been since the day I met you." She shrugged, looking down as she blushed crimson.
She soldiered on. "The day I met you, I told you I wanted to join Fairy Tail. And you made it happen. On our first team mission, you wanted to destroy that book. I asked you to wait, and you listened even though you had no reason to believe me. You've always listened. I've always...alwaysknown you were listening to me."
She looked up at him, but the intensity he was watching her with nearly made her look away again.
"I love you."
He said it so simply, like it was merely the way it was. Up was up and down was down and Natsu loved Lucy.
It was straight forward and earnest, almost awkwardly so.
It was perfect.
She gasped, and then she felt the smile return.
"I love you too." It was a whisper, but Natsu had great hearing, after all.