I basically got bored of all the fics here, so I decided to make one myself. Tell me if i should continue this, and please give me some criticism so I can improve in this sort of stuff.

Crowds of people as far as the eye can see, and I was the only one propped up on the stage. Roars filled the air; cheers would've been heard miles away from us, causing passersbys to wonder what all the ruckus was about.

I felt triumphant, like a god. There was nothing as good as this feeling. The feeling of greatness, not even Alexander could match me.

"HACHIMAN, HACHIMAN, HACHIMAN!" The cheer of my name now flooded the area. Wait, why were they cheering again? Oh right. It was because I, the Hikigaya Hachiman, had just been declared the number one HouseHusband in the nation. Amazing, right?

"-ki"

Wait, that just sounded like a certain airhea-

"Hikki!!"

Ah.

It seems like i was just awakened from my amazing escape from. Damn you woman, that was one of the better dreams, damn it!

I turned towards the pink-haired airhead that was causing all the unnecessary ruckus. Her cheeks were puffed out, an 'angry' expression creeping on her face. Well, less angry, and more cute. Seriously, she can't actually look angry to save her life.

"Mou, Hikki, are you even listening?!"

"Of course I was."

"Oh? Hikideafgaya-kun, listening? Well then, please enlighten me about what Yuigahama-san has just informed us about?"

...crap. Wait, I can logically deduct what Yuigahama was talking about, it is apart of my "108 Skills Of A Loner" Skill : Deduction, afterall. First, knowing Yuigahama, she would be talking about stupid riajuu-related nonsense. Where were we? We somehow ended up in the more metropolitan area of Chiba. Surroundings? Cafe's, pet stores, markets, grocery markets, malls, restaurants, and other popular hangout spots. What are some of Yuigahama's interests? Pets, or more accurately, dogs. Food, malls, and all the other things riajuus like. What are we doing? Walking Yuigahama, and Yukinoshita, towards her house. Mode of transportation? Walking. Alright, now is the time to use my investigative skills which are 100% accurate, for the most part.

Let's see, club has just ended, so now we're walking towards Yuigahama's house; As we were walking, Yuigahama noticed a petshop just ahead of us. She obviously loves her dog, Sable. She's also been talking about how sad he seemed lately. This only leaves one conclusion...

" You were planning to buy Sable some treats in order to cheer him up from his crippling, depression so he doesn't end up jumping off a roof to free himself from the harsh reality called life, were you not?" I say, a triumphant grin coming into existence on my above average looking face.

Yuigahama's face went from cute and angry, to curious and questioning, and finally ended up on confused and frustrated, in the time span of 10 seconds. Seriously Gahama-san, I worry for your undoubtedly low IQ and your future as a minimum wage worker.

Yukinoshita glared at me with disgust, as if I was nothing more than mere dirt. Wait no, her harsh glare increased tenfold, it was like she was glaring at the person responsible for all the abuse stray cats suffered. Oi, I may be harsh, and pessimistic, but I'm not plain evil, this isn't fair at all!

"My apologies Yuigahama-san, but it seems all your efforts in trying to communicate with this...lowly being, barely able to be called a living being, was all for naught. It seems that he does not possess the ability to hear and process information, nor the intellectual capacity to form any coherent thought."

"Oi, that assumption is unfair. My conclusion was all based on Yuigahama, Her interest, and our current location. Also, I believe that my theory was quite coherent."

"Mou, Hikki, Me and Yukinon were talking about going to a cafe before heading home, I'm pretty hungry after all hahaha…" Yuigahama said, avoiding any eye contact towards me. She was definitely blushing though, not to mention that her eyes had a sudden interest in the ground for some reason. Geez, you should be aware of how you act Gahama-san, if I was any other normal person I'd have already fallen with you.

"O-oh, well I can't turndown free food, everyone knows that food tastes best when you don't have to pay."

"Hikigaya-kun, who said anything about paying for you?"

"Hah? Aren't you super rich or something?"

"And? That does not give you the right to leech off of me"

"Stop acting like I'm begging for cash, I'm not even poor, for your information"

"Ara? Did you not just expect me to pay for your meal? Hikipoorgaya?"

"H-hey, it's alright Hikki, I have some extra money, so I can pay for you!" Yuigahama interrupted.

"I-is that so? Well I gue-"

I felt the sudden vibration of my phone, followed by the rare sound of a notification. I stopped walking, fished my phone out of my pocket and checked the screen. It was a text message from my cute and lovable imouto. Feeling a grin creep onto my face, I unlocked my phone and read the text.

"Can you buy some snacks for you cute little imouto? Please, only the best Oni-chan would know my favorite snacks! Kyaaaa~ I bet that earned a ton of Komachi Points!"

Oi, I'm not an errand boy you know, but I'll do it since you're the cutest little sister out there

"Sure" I messaged back.

I pocketed my phone and looked at the other two, who I just realized, ceased talking.

" Hey, Hikki, who was that!?" Yuigahama asked, a look of concern etched on her face

"Hikigaya-kun texting someone? Now I've seen everything." Yukinoshita teased.

Oi, even I have a social life ya know. I think.

"It was only Komachi, she asked me to pick up some snacks." I replied, the grin on my face still apparent.

"Siscon." They simultaneously said, both faces blank of any emotion

"Ew, ya know Hikki, that face is totally creepy haha." Yuigahama insulted, a look of relief swept across her face. Oi, that kinda hurts you know.

"Indeed Yuigahama-san, I worry for my chasity whenever I witness that horrifying spectacle of a smile." Yukinoshita criticized. Oi, I'm not a predator, where'd you even get that from anyway, I don't even look like one you know!

"Well, putting the insults aside, I'm going to have to take my fortunate leave."

"Oh ok! Then me and Yukinon will just go to the cafe. Wait, fortunate??" She said, her cheeks puffing up.

"Ah, it seems so, farewell Hikigaya-kun"

"Ah, Bye Hikki, see you tomorrow then!" Her puffed up cheeks disappeared just as fast as they appeared.

"See you two tomorrow then" I waved them off as I began my walk towards home.

--‐--

It was getting dark. The previous warm orange and yellow sky was quickly being replaced with the cold breeze of purple and blue. I quickened my pace towards the destination known as my home, the two plastic bags full of snacks echoed in the silent night as the contents kept tumbling and pushing each other.

"...elp…" The sudden croak of a voice grabbed my attention. I stopped my gait and looked at my surroundings to find the source of the sound.

"...help…" I heard the weak whispers of a voice drift through the silent air. I creeped closer to a pitch dark alley, suspicious to say the least. After about 5 meters, it was basically impossible to see anything, not to mention how narrow it was. Maybe about 3 meters wide, while being squished between a bookstore and a cafe. The neon light being illuminated from the cafe assured me, probably more than it should have.

Without much thought, I stepped deeper into the narrow alley, calling for the owner of the weak voice. I retrieved my phone from my pants and turned on the flashlight feature to illuminate the way, after dropping both bags to the floor.

Pretty useful, they should put a flashlight in everything, that way it would be basically impossible to wander into a dark abandoned alley.

I continued further until I noticed the silhouette of a figure lying on the floor. I slowed down my pace, and began creeping towards the figure.

"Oi, you ok?" I called out.

The only sound I got in return was a gruff grunt. I approached closer and saw the man's attire. He was laying on his side on the dirty ground. Most of the man's body was covered in a dirty yellow blanket I noticed the end of his pants were ripped up. He had no shoes, and the soles of his feet were as dark and dirty as the ground itself.

Great, I somehow end up in a dark alley with an injured homeless man.

"Oi, you ok?" I repeated, while putting more urgency in my voice.

"H...hur...hurt…..nee...need...h..help" He somehow croaked out. His voice seemed rugged and gruff, it was as if he was both dehydrated and had a sore throat.

I was basically looming over him at this point. I began to bend down in order to lift the blanket off of him and check for any injuries on the man. As I was reaching for it, he I saw movement from underneath the blanket.

The man quickly threw the blanket away from him, his upper body suddenly twisted in my direction.

I felt a dull punch hit my abdomen, which caught me off guard and made me lose my balance. I fell back, stunned and what just occurred. I was about to scream for help, I had no idea what this man would do to me next.

"HE-" The dirty grungy man bolted up quickly, and swiftly closed the distance between us. He thrusted his foot to the side of my face, which connected. The man then stormed out of the alley.

The force of the impact caused my head to jerk to my right and hit the side of the alley. I felt pain spread throughout my head. My vision began to blur and darken, I felt dazed and dizzy. Mix that in with the pain, and it was like hell. I felt confusion for some reason. I tried getting up, to no avail.

I soon felt my abdomen flare up in pain. I tried screaming, but nothing came. Instead, it was replaced with gurgling, and incoherent screeching and breathing. The pain in my abdomen quickly escalated. It started to feel like a fire.

I couldn't scream. I could barely move. I was too dazed to move, and the only thing that filled my thoughts was the agonizing pain in my abdomen. Breathing became harder and more painful. Each breath felt like a punch to my stomach. I wanted to stop, but my body wouldn't let me. I could feel tears begin to slide down my face.

Was this death? Am I going to die so early? I can't. I have dreams. I finally have friends. This is too cruel, way too cruel. What about komachi? I can't just leave her, i couldn't.

My eyelids felt like they weighed a ton. My entire body began to numb. It was cold. Why was everything so cold? I want a blanket, somebody please help.

The only thing that escapes my lips were quiet whispers. And I soon felt sleep start to eat at me.

I guess I died the same way I lived, full of regrets and all alone.