Deadpool's Bogus Journey (Special)

Several Months Earlier...

Deadpool had left Vale roughly a month prior. Now, like the wicked desperado he was he wandered the countryside in search for the White Fang hideout. Going off base intuition alone, mostly because he had killed every White Fang member he encountered during The Fall, he searched high and low for any trace of a hideout. Eventually his travels led him to a small mining town owned by the Schnee Dust Company. Yes, the entire town. Schnee owns the mine so he built the town around it, the workers live in SDC homes and pay rent to the company. The pay for working in the mine is barely enough to live and whatever money the company spends on keeping the homes running is almost made null due to the ridiculous rent tenants pay. Deadpool walked to the edge of town where he was met by guards wearing the SDC logo on their arms. "Stop right there!" one of the guards called out, "Who are you, what do you want?"

Deadpool looked at the two guards and saw they both had already turned off their safeties on their guns. "Really?" Deadpool shrugged, "The name's Deadpool, I'm here looking for any guesses to a White Fang Hideout. The two guards looked at each other and nodded.

"Sir, we're gonna have to ask you to move along. Next village should be about three clicks to the east."

Deadpool nodded, "Cool, wasn't asking." Deadpool quickly pulled out his sword and sliced it into one guard's neck. The other guard brought up his rifle to shoot, but was brought to the ground when Deadpool fired his Deagle behind his back and hit the guard in the leg. Deadpool then kicked the downed guard backwards and took his sword out of the other guard's body, catching his rifle as he fell, "Thanks." as the downed guard tried to get up Deadpool unleashed an entire magazine into the guard's face. What will we do if people come asking? "Guy Dick Cheney'd his friend because he thought he was a Grimm, then an actual Grimm took a big chunk outta him." after a quick hide of the bodies in the nearby brush Deadpool continued into the town.

Looking around the mining town he found a large sign with the name of the town firmly plastered on it "Everlast: The town of everlasting peace." Deadpool looked around to see the run down buildings dozens of armed soldiers and workers wearing what were essentially rags, "Sure, peace for those in charge, absolute hell for the drones." Why don't the workers protest? You know, form a union. "Something tells me unions don't fly at SDC." Looking down an alleyway Deadpool watched as a worker is kicked down by guards before being spit on and the guards walking away laughing.

"Next time pay your rent, the SDC has no use for deadbeats." one of the guards said while they walked away.

Deadpool poked his head back down the alley to see the worker trying to get back on his feet. The worker had brown hair and a slight beard, he wore a jumper like the other mine workers, but didn't seem to have any clear indicator if he was a faunus or not. Deadpool walked over to the worker and pat his back, "Who are the patriots?"

"W-What?" the man asked still trying to catch his breath.

"WHO ARE THE PATRIOTS!?" Deadpool yelled in the man's ear.

"Ow! Fuck!" the man leaned back and Deadpool looked down and saw the White Fang logo tattooed on the man's neck. Oh, look at that...We're siding with police on this one. Deadpool grabbed the man by his throat and lifted him up. "What...the hell...is your problem?:

"I just have some questions for you." Deadpool cocked his fist back to punch the man in the face but hesitated, "By the way, the answer was 'La-Le-Lou-Le-Lo.'" with that Deadpool punched the man in the face and knocked him out.

The man awoke several hours later hanging from the top of an abandoned mine entrance. He was upside down and he could look all the way down the mountain to the other entrance. The people of village could not see him nor hear him scream, "HEEEELLP!! SOMEBODY!" he cried out. Looking up more he was able to see Deadpool holding a combat knife and sliding it against a nylon rope that wrapped around the man's leg. "W-W-What the hell do you want?" he cried out.

Deadpool kneeled and brought the man up towards his face, gripping him by his chin, "I'm looking for Winney the Pooh and it seems that you're my honey pot for finding him." Deadpool said as he slowly spun the knife in his hand.

"I-I-I-I don't understand that joke. Are you referencing something?" the faunus squirmed in Deadpool's hand as the mercenary brought the knife against his neck.

"ADAM! I'm looking for the White Fang hideout here on Sanus as well as Adam Taurus! I know it's in the Kingdom of Vale's territory." Deadpool growled as he now held the faunus over his head by the man's throat.

"I don't know what your're talking about!" the faunus struggled. Deadpool nodded before stabbing the man in the side of the leg causing him to scream out in pain. "WHAT THE HELL'S YOUR PROBLEM!"

"Problem?" Deadpool laughed, "Problem, why would I have a problem? Just...taking out the trash." Deadpool threw the man over the side to let him hang by his legs while the knife stayed lodged in his thigh. Deadpool then pulled a 1911 from his belt, "This here...is the only Government I ever trusted. Small, reliable. Get's the job done. Liiiiiiike cutting rope for example." the faunus's eyes widened in fear as Deadpool aimed the pistol at the rope and shot the rope off the pulley causing the faunus to drop a couple dozen feet to a bed of rocks. Will he be...like okay? "Oh yeah. Aura is one hell of a drug."

The faunus slowly awoke to a dark room, no, cave of sorts with the only light coming from a small fire that seemed to be boiling something. The faunus tried to move but found himself restrained to a chair that had a hole cut in the bottom as well as his pants missing. "What the hell?" he whispered. He kept looking around and saw a long sock filled with something as well as several weapons laid out along the ground. The faunus began tilting himself back and forth before he finally tipped him and the chair over.

"OH! Looks like somebody's awake!" the faunus' eyes widened when he heard Deadpool's voice before having him and the chair lifted back upright. "Man you have been out for like..." Deadpool began counting his fingers, "Two days." he laughed, "Oh! I see it's time to change your bandage." Deadpool walked over to the faunus and removed the bandage over his leg where the knife was at showing a scab meaning the faunus's aura was doing it's work. "Wow, aura really is something, huh? Now if only it could prevent you from hurting yourself more by just telling me the truth."

"I told you, I don't know what you're talking about!" the faunus shouted, "Now let me go you bastard.

"Oh, poor poor innocent Tevin," the faunus cocked an eyebrow in confusion, "Your name isn't Tevin? You looked like a Tevin. Anyways, Trover, since you still don't feel like cooperating it seems I have to get a little physical with you." Deadpool took out a different knife from his boot and stabbed him in the thigh where the old wound was still healing, making the faunus cry out in pain again. "Oh my god, you're bleeding! Well, we can't have that. Better seel the wound." Deadpool walked over to the fire and pulled out the original knife he stabbed the faunus with, now super heated blazing red from the heat.

"No. No, no, no, no. You don't have to do that." the faunus pleaded.

"Where's the base?" Deadpool asked as he slowly walked over.

"I told you I don't know!"

Deadpool shrugged, "Okay." he then knelt down and shoved the super heated blade through the faunus's open wound causing him to scream louder and louder the deeper it went. Deadpool then quickly pulled the blade out leaving a small gap in the man's leg where the blade cauterized as it sat in the wound. The resulting action was too much for the faunus which led to him fainting. "Oh no, not on my watch." Deadpool was able to wake the man up thanks to some smelling salts he had on hand.

"Oh god!" the faunus yelled out, "A nightmare, this has to be a nightmare."

"Yes, a nightmare, and it can all end if you just tell me. WHERE. IS. THE. BASE!" Deadpool kicked the chair forward to make the faunus land on his face. Looking in front of him he could see all sorts of potential torture devices. A sock with something in it, a golf club, jumper cables.

"I told you I don't kn--OOOOOW!" the faunus yelped in surprise as he felt something go up where things should not be entering. Deadpool walked back to the fire and lifted up the pot which was steaming with some liquid. "W-W-What are you doing?"

"Oh, just...making intestine soup." the faunus eyes widened as Deadpool held up a funnel next to the pot.

"OKAY! OKAY! I'LL TELL YOU!" Deadpool lowered the pot to listen, "It's was closer than you think. If you go back to the outskirts of Vale near one of the run down villages, a place called Chelan, there is an old plantation building that the White Fang of Vale have been using for the main operating base. It's close to everything, Vale, here, Tacoma, any major port!"

"Thank you." Deadpool nodded causing the faunus to smile. Deadpool then lifted the pot again and poured the boiling contents down it leading to the man's insides.

"AAAAAAAAGHHHH-AAAAAAAGHHAAAAAA!!!" The blood curdling screams almost made Deadpool shudder. "WHY!?!?!" the man asked as tears fell down his face.

"Because you made me ask more than once." Deadpool grabbed his supplies and began to leave the cave, before he did so he looked back, "By the way, this is just deeper in the mine shaft. If you listen for sounds of depression and the clink clanking of mining equipment I'm sure you can escape the cave in...you know, assuming you can get out of your restraints." with that Deadpool left leaving the faunus to ponder in pain.

"Cave in? What cave-" before he could finish there were several loud explosions in the shaft that eventually lead to the mine collapsing in on the faunus.

Deadpool took a deep breath while outside to appreciate the anarchy that ensued. Looking at the village he could see large buildings burning and a pile of bodies of people who were higher ups or guards for SDC. Another day another Guerilla Uprising. In the village there stood the workers cheering in victory neither caring who was human and who was faunus. "Yeah, congratulations guys! Way to stick it to the man, go Marx and all that bullshit." Deadpool clapped. "So, how many of you are White Fang? Step forward because it was you guys that really lead to the change." the workers who had White Fang insignias on their bodies or were more recent members stepped forward, "Wow, fantastic, thank you." Deadpool picked up a downed guard's assault rifle and gunned down all those that stepped forward leaving the workers to look on in horror at the man who STARTED the insurrection. "Let that be a message to you all, don't be terrorists. I'll give you all a slide because SDC is full corrupt assholes, but the White Fang pissed me off so...Tootleloo!" with a wave of his fingers Deadpool grabbed an abandoned jeep and made his way back to Vale, leaving the workers in shock and panic.

Was that uh...Was that the best decision? "Probably not, but hey, they'll figure it out. America did (somehow)."

Several Days Later...

Deadpool drove up to the abandoned village of Chelan his jeep sputtering as it ran out of fuel. When the car finally came to a stop the tires cartoonishly fell off as well as the body leaving just deadpool sitting in a leather seat on a frame of a vehicle holding the steering wheel in hand. Then the frame fell apart leaving just Deadpool in a seat holding the wheel which popped out of place. "Man, it's a good thing we transitioned to this spot." he said with a wipe of his brow, "Be hard to explain all that goofy shit coming out of no where." Yeah, like when we had our car attacked and had to make a massive break for it.

Deadpool stepped away from the vehicle and grabbed his bag full of supplies before heading to a place to hide out so he could watch for White Fang coming to and from the hideout. "Oh, better lock the car. Don't want it getting stolen." he turned around and clicked the lock button on the keys causing the car to beep, the result led to the vehicle blowing up in a massive puff of fire, "Well, it won't get stolen." Yeah, just remember where we parked the car. Deadpool found himself a nice run out building that he decided to make his camp in. Knocking out a few bricks from under the window he made a nice hole for him to shove binoculars into which would help him focus on the plantation building. It was a large wooden structure, it was honestly a miracle it was still standing if it was as old as he thought it was. How do we know they're even in there? "We don't which is why we wait to see somebody leave the building. This village is run down which means they're probably banking on people's fears of the Grimm to keep big groups away."

Several hours pass and Deadpool noticed that nightfall was approaching. "Jesus if nobody shows up by morning I'm storming the compound." What if your info was bad? May as well check now. Deadpool sighed and grabbed his swords off the ground, "God, I have to do everything around here." He walked to the compound and looked around the building, to his surprise no guards were posted at any area that looked to be a valuable position. "Okay, well maybe it's a trap." Deadpool reached for his pistol but stopped and wagged his finger in disappointment, he then reached farther back behind him and grabbed a riot shotgun and cocked it. "I came to kick ass and chew bubblegum, and I'm all outta gum." he said in his best Duke Nukem impression.

Deadpool kicked the main door open and began firing in all directions expecting to hit someone. To his surprise the building was completely empty. "What the hell..." he whispered, "HELLO!" Maybe they went out for booze. "Oh, then they have something in common with my father. HEY! ANYBODY HERE?!" Deadpool slowly swept the bottom floor before putting the broom he found back in the closet, "Too dirty of a floor will ruin the grip on your kicks. Be sure to clean the floor and the soles of your shoes kids." He then began checking the different rooms expecting to find a hidden entrance or something, instead he found nothing but rotten wooden furniture and rat nests. He slumped his shoulders and decided to check the other floors.

He kicked open every single door on the second floor ready to shoot anybody inside, but like the first floor there wasn't anything to be found. On the third floor he just began lazily opening doors, a couple nearly disintegrated at the touch. Finally, by the final door on the third floor Deadpool just decided to knock in hopes somebody would answer. He then opened the door to see, again, there was nothing. "UUUUUUUUGH..." he groaned as he collapsed to his knees and rubbed his temples, "That lying sack of shit, and after I cauterized his leg." Wait, what's that? "Hm?" Deadpool pulled out a telescope from...somewhere, and looked off in the distance to see another IDENTICAL plantation building on the other side of the village, "Wait, what the fuck? There's two buildings? Why are there two buildings!?" Well, they seem to be on guard over there after you rang out so many shots in here. Again, Deadpool groaned and rubbed his temples in frustration, "I can't wait to get the hell out of here so I don't have to deal with this shit anymore."

Once again, grabbing his supplies Deadpool marched to the plantation building on the other side of the village mumbling Hanna-Barbera curses, "Razzle frazzle dash. Mazzle zazzle gash."

"What the hell?" one of the guards asked as they saw Deadpool approaching the compound, "Intruder! We have an intruder!"

Deadpool sighed as searchlights shone down on him and White Fang goons began to pile out of the building in the dozens, "Look, I waisted a bunch of momentum and energy infiltrating that other plantation building over there so can we hurry this up. Also, what's up with the other building?"

"That's just another plantation building on the other side of the village, identical to this one in every way. Apparently they used to belong to twins who split the village in half." one of the White Fang members explained.

"Okay, so why don't you guys use both? I mean it's just you guys here after all. Set up a landline or something, make one a beer hall or something." Deadpool suggested.

"HA!" one of the White Fang members laughed, "You moron, then we'd have two bases in the middle of an abandoned village. Woopty-fucking-doo."

"Yeah man, what are you, retarded?" one of the other goons asked causing the White Fang members to burst out into laughter.

"Right, Rooster Teeth show." Deadpool popped his neck before stretching, "Okay, let's get this over with." Deadpool unsheathed his swords and tossed a grenade into the middle of the crowd.

"GRENADE!"

The explosion sent bodies flying as their aura began to flicker and Deadpool moved forward at quick speeds and began slicing at his opponents while also blocking bullet fire...sometimes. During the skirmish he was caught off guard when stabbed through his abdomen with a lance, "A lance? Seriously? What is this medieval jousting?" during his ranting the White Fang began to fire at him with full force. Okay, bad luck. Let's think about the situation. "Yeah." Deadpool cupped his chin with his thumb and index finger and thought of a plan as he got shot, "Ow. Okay, how about we just get rid of all of them, but leave one." Oh? To spread our reputation? "Maybe. It all depends on if Adam is here or not." Deadpool pulled the lance from his stomach and began to smack around other White Fang goons with it before pulling out his guns and giving them a taste of his superior firepower.

"Oh crap!" One of the members shouted from the second storey balcony. He dashed back into the building and rushed to a communications device so he could try to get out an S.O.S to other White Fang groups that may be nearby. However, his plans were cut short when the terminal was blasted with gunfire and he was pinned to the station with one of Deadpool's katana's.

"Okay..." Deadpool started, "I seem to have noticed your leader isn't here and that uh...makes things difficult for me." he grunted as he shoved the sword in deeper, "So, I want you to tell me, THE FIRST TIME. Where. Is. Adam?"

The White Fang goon coughed out blood, "Honestly? He should be on Anima by now. No longer will he be the leader of Vale's branch, no, now he shall take his rightful place as HIGH LEADER of all the White Fang."

"Cool, cool." Deadpool said as he wrote down what the goon said on his scroll, "And...where is this hideout exactly?"

"Mistral." the goon grinned, "But you'll never get in. Guards patrol the building constantly. The odds alone of you finding the building is nill. You have no chance!"

Deadpool weighed his options, "Well...can't hurt to try." he pulled his sword out of the goon and left him there to fend for himself. "Well, would you look at that? Mistral here I come!" What's the best course of action? "You heard that guy before. There's loads of Port cities, what was one he said...Tacoma? Let's head there!" Annnnnd Jump!

One Week Later...

Due to the jeep breaking down Deadpool was forced to hike his way to the port town of Tacoma. Lucky for him he had made good progress before hand. Just before he made his way into town he took note of all the guards in white, "You've got to be kidding me." Deadpool groaned as he squinted to get a better look, "This place is run by SDC too!?" he saw guards carrying off White Fang members linked together by chains and loading them onto some sort of transport ship. Hmm...we could probably skip all of this if we jacked that ship right now. "Yeah?" Hear me...you...out. If we steal the ship right now then we can convince the White Fang guys to take us to their hideout. "I think that's gonna be hard." Why? "Because the ship just took off." Deadpool looked up and watched as the transport ship lifted into the air and took off across the water, likely to Mistral which would have cells for them to use. Plan B then.

Deadpool strolled into town making note of the rather...calm yet unsettling atmosphere. He noticed SDC but also Atlesian guards, so this place definitely was well protected. Looking around he was finally able to find a transport ship, though it wasn't a good one. "Excuse me," he called out gaining the attention of an SDC pilot.

"Yes?" he asked, "I kinda have a schedule to keep so can you be quick." the pilot was a young looking man wearing typical pilot attire such as a specialized helmet and a special blue and white uniform.

"Look," Deadpool brought out his wallet with several thousand lien in cash, "How much would you say is good to take me to Anima and be at my call if I need an escape?" the pilot shook his head in disbelief even reduced the polarization on his visor to get a better view. The pilot then looked around to make sure nobody was paying attention and brought Deadpool to his transport.

"Get in the back and duck. And...don't look in the crates, yeah?" The pilot let Deadpool onto his transport and he waved goodbye to some of the guards before he himself got into the cockpit and took off. "So, where are you heading?" he asked.

"Just to the next port in Anima is fine." Deadpool mentioned as he finally got out of his hiding spot and came and sat in the cockpit with the pilot, "You realize I'm a wanted man, right?"

"Oh yeah, but your money isn't." the pilot replied with a smile.

"Good man." Deadpool nodded. The two sat in silence for sometime before Deadpool turned on the pilot's radio, "Sorry, I just hate silence."

Several Hours Later...

Waking up from a quick nap Deadpool looked out his window to see what he thought was a giant island of sorts, "Whoa, what island is that?" he asked.

"Not an island, friend. Grimm." the pilot replied, "A more harmless sea creature, think of it almost like a moving ecosystem. It goes down for a bit, then comes up and floats a round for a couple hundred years." Deadpool looked down and saw the creature begin its descent into the ocean, "Look at that!" the pilot said enthusiastically, "You should buy some lotto tickets, that's a once in a lifetime event you just witnessed." Maybe that means our luck will pay off.

Shortly after seeing the giant creature the pilot landed in a port city on the edge of the Mistral kingdom. It was a nice place...for lower folk. Very chic, not exactly for higher class, but perfect for Deadpool's plans. "Hey, just so you know I'm not exactly supposed to be here, so if you get in trouble don't expect me to bail you out." Deadpool nodded before walking into the city. We have to think critically. Where would someone go to gain information on a shady organization in a shady town like this?

"A bar? Criminal underground?" Deadpool suggested as he walked past a vendor selling jewelry, "Though, to be honest, I'm pretty sure that in a place like this the criminal underground is above ground. If you catch my drift." Eventually Deadpool came to a bar with plenty of patrons inside, "Welp, best place to start I suppose." Walking inside Deadpool was given a few strange looks by the many shady looking patrons, "What? It's a business suit. Tch." he shook his head before walking over to the bartender.

"What'll you be having?" a large, amazonian type woman asked the merc.

"Well, you see," Deadpool pulled out a piece of paper with a crude drawing of him repeatedly stabbing Adam in the face, "I'm looking for the White Fang hideout, I don't suppose you could help me?" the bar suddenly went silent as the whole bar looked at Deadpool with disdain.

"What?" one of the bar goers asked with a southern drawl. He stood up and spit in a jar before walking over to Deadpool with an awkward limp, "What you asking about them animals for, boy?" he spit in Deadpool's mask and the merc could smell the rank alcohol on his breath. "You know, we don't take too kindly to people asking about those beasts." the drunkard placed a large weapon on the bar next to Deadpool and the merc could see many of the other patrons reaching for their own weapons. Oh great, a racist bar.

"Look, I'm just looking for the White Fang hideout, I have some personal business to deal with them." Deadpool explained as he laid out his own gun on the table, "Now, I don't know about you, but I've been extremely sober for the last twenty years, and all of you have been drinking for who knows how long." the bar goers mumbled amongst themselves before Deadpool continued, "Also I'm a trained mercenary and most of you are either retired or just some jackass who thinks they're hot shit. So, tell me, where can I find the White Fang hideout?"

The patrons of the bar began to huddle together as they discussed whether they should tell him. "Alright, merc." one of the older patrons said, "If you want to know so bad why don't you go around the capital. Ask around, you're bound to find someone."

"There, see! Now we're getting somewhere!" Deadpool laughed, "A ROUND FOR EVERYBODY!" Um...aren't we being a little too carefree? "It's fiiiiine."

After a few hours Deadpool left the bar and hitched a ride on a train to the capital. He had to be careful as to not be recognized as he was a wanted criminal. Which is ironic considering a man wearing red tights sticks out pretty well. "Okay, get to the capital and ask around. Shouldn't be too difficult. From what I've seen the Faunus here have more than enough reason to want to rebel against the humans." Right, with all the anti-Faunus signs we've seen around I wouldn't be surprised to see some sort of protest as soon as we get off the train.

The train slowly began to stop much to the passengers' surprise. "Why are we stopping? We shouldn't be close to the capital yet." Deadpool mentioned. He opened the blinds to see what was going on and saw Mistral police pointing guns at his cabin.

"Wade Winston Wilson. Also known by the name Deadpool!" a fenale voice called out from a mega phone, "You are hereby under arrest by order of the Atlesian government for which we are cooperating with. If you do not come out quietly to surrender yourself we will be forced to use force."

"They're cops, what the hell could they have to fight me?" Deadpool snickered as he began to leave the train. Once he got off he was shot several times by heavy artillery being used by an Atlesian soldier. Ah. So that's how. Shoot us down and arrest us. Smart tactic.

"Get him in cuffs." the woman commanded.

"Thanks for your help, Captain." one of the Atlesian soldiers said as they shook the woman's hand. "With this criminal finally in our possession Remnant is all that much safer."

The Captain smirked, "Yeah, well, I should be thanking you. Who knows what he was going to do on my streets." the Captain looked at the unconcious form of Deadpool as he was cuffed up and loaded onto a Bullhead with many soldiers to keep their weapons trained on the mercenary. "So...what are you going to do with him, can I ask?"

"Sorry ma'am, but that's highly classified information. To tell someone outside the military could place them in jeopardy." the soldier recited.

The Captain cocked an eyebrow, "So...you don't know then?"

"N...No." the soldier sighed. The soldier gave the Captain a salute and loaded onto the Bullhead with the rest of his squad.

The Captain put a cigarette in her mouth and lit it as the Bullhead took off, "Fuckin' Jarhead." she smirked.

Deadpool's vision blurred in and out as he awoke to several soldiers putting their weapons at him while the another kept watch over the weapons Deadpool had on him. "Woah, this is like that one time back in college, except this time women are involved too." he winked to the thin framed soldier.

"I have a dick, dumbass." the soldier replied.

"Oh, in that case it's exactly like college." Deadpool chuckled. One of the soldiers slammed him in the face with the butt of their rifle. "I see jokes aren't your thing." he smirked, "Quick question, where are we headed exactly?"

"You are headed to a maximum security prison in Atlas." one of the guards smirked, "From there, General Ironwood will deal with you in any matter he sees fit. In fact..." the guard turned Deadpool's head out the window to see the floating island above Mantle. "Get used to the view now, you'll be seeing white walls for the rest of your life."

Deadpool laughed causing the soldiers to stare at him with awkward expressions, "Sorry, it's just so funny...Heh. You see, no matter how you put it...I'm cursed to never die! So the rest of my life, is all eternity!" he laughed, "But you? Well...the rest of your life...just may hit you faster than you think." he grunted and suddenly the squad heard the sound of ticking coming from his supplies.

"What the hell was that?" one of the soldiers was frantically searching through Deadpool's belongings while Deadpool's laughter grew louder and louder. Finally the soldier found a bomb within Deadpool's belongings that had a timer on it.

"HA HA! You shouldv'e done a body-cavity search!" within seconds the bomb detonated and the Bullhead began quickly descending to Mantle.

"...Bullhead Delta-021, do you copy?" Deadpool could hear the sound of the Atlas Military trying to contact the Bullhead.

"Not...gonna get through." he chuckled, "Because nobody's gonna answer." Deadpool grabbed his supplies and picked up his arm which had blown off. He then stepped over the lifeless bodies of the soldiers who had captured him. "Now I need to get out of here." Deadpool limped through the dark streets of Mantle avoiding other soldiers as well as the general public. "One good thing about Mantle...they seem to hate James as much as I do." While walking Deadpool ran into a civilian walking out of a convenience store.

"Hey, dickweed watch where you're...OH DEADPOOL!" much to Deadpool's surprise it was the pilot guy he had met in Tacoma. "Holy shit, I can't believe you're here...wait...why are you here?"

"Long story, look can you take me back to Haven?" Deadpool asked while looking around to make sure nobody recognized him.

"Woah..." the pilot stepped back, "This may be a wild coincidence but...I'm totally doing a Haven run soon. I could totally sneak you but...you'd have to hide with the supplies."

"Deal."

Several Minutes Later...

"Admittedly, this is not what I thought he meant." Deadpool groaned as he was cramped in a crate that is usually used to hold Dust. "I understand hiding me, but why the hell do I have to be on the bottom with like two other boxes on top of me?" Deadpool could only feel bumps from turbulence and the eventual stop from landing. "Come on! Pilot! Let me out now!" soon the oxygen was running low and Deadpool passed out.

Deadpool eventually was able to wake up to darkness. "Oh dude...is it night? Day?" he heard an explosion and the whole ship began moving out of control. "OH SHIT! Get me out of here!" Deadpool yelled while pounding on the case, "Hey dipshit, I'm not going down without putting up a fight! I have places to be!" There was some clamoring above him before the case was unlocked and Deadpool popped out like a Jack-in-the-box. "Ten Thousand Years, will give you such a crik in the neck!" Are we allowed to make that joke?

"Wh...Deadpool?" Deadpool looked down to see the confused look of Weiss Schnee now wearing a blue-gray dress that turned white at the skirt. blue-gray collar and sleeve only top with her logo on the back and a blue pendant on her neck. As well as gray see-through knee high stockings and blu-gray heels. "Whatever! I need your help! Lancers are trying to take apart our transport!"

"Say no more." Deadpool hopped out of the case and fell immediately because his legs were still partially asleep, "Dammit!" getting up, Deadpool was able to grab a rifle he had taken from one of the Atlesian soldiers and began firing away at the Lancers (Wasp like Grimm). Together with Weiss the duo was able to take down many of the bugs while the pilot tried to evade.

"Hold on! I have an idea!" the pilot shouted from the intercom as he dove the ship down and caused several Lancers to crash into floating islands. From seeing that Weiss had an idea.

"Do you think you could find a couple of islands close together?" Weiss asked.

"Kid, you read my mind." the pilot sped up as he flew into a narrow crevice between two floating islands. Deadpool grabbed a semtex and threw it out the back, accidentally attaching it to a rock bridge between the islands.

"Oops." Deadpool shrugged and detonated the semtex taking out many Lancers with it. "Well, not the original idea, but it still worked." Weiss smirked and flicked her saber creating orange glyphs that shot out fireballs and hit the walls of the islands causing chunks of rock to collapse. The rocks came down and smacked the Lancers out of the air. The pilot weaved in and out of the rocks and made it out of the crevice with only a few holes from the Lancers' stingers.

"YEAH! Way to go, kid!" the pilot cheered. Weiss laughed slightly and held herself up. The celebration was cut short when a Lancer larger than the others rose up from behind the ship.

"Well shit, should've brought a bottle of raid." Deadpool groaned.

"It's a Queen Lancer!" Weiss yelled out. She quickly tried to shoot it out of the sky with her glyphs while Deadpool opened fire. Unfortunately the skin of the Lancer proved to be too strong as the projectiles just bounced off. Weiss clenched her teeth in frustration as the Queen Lancer opened up what seemed to look like vents on its body and shot out stingers like a machine gun. Weiss turned her body and activated her aura while Deadpool hid behind her. The stingers that were shot out were going all over the place and eventually hit one of the turbines.

The pilot had to struggle to keep their altitude but could still see they would eventually fall. "Do something!" he shouted out.

Weiss bit her lip thinking her plan wouldn't work, but not dying was the priority. Because of that Weiss jumped over the crates of Dust and cut the cord holding them in place allowing the air pressure to take them out the back. "Hey, what the fuck!?" Deadpool yelled as he narrowly hurdled over one of the crates before it took him outside. "Warn me next time, damn!" Weiss fired projectiles from her glyphs again and blew up all the crates as they approached the Queen Lancer, however this was not enough to destroy the Queen. "Sooooo...that obviously wasn't enough." Deadpool continued to shoot at the Lancer to no avail. Weiss nodded and used her glyphs to summon the armored knight she had taken down during her training before Beacon.

Weiss looked at the armored knight and smirked, "Pull up, NOW!" The pilot pulled upwards and Deadpool had to stab his sword into the ground to keep from falling out, while Weiss used a Gravity Glyph to keep her in place while the summoned knight fell down and sliced the Queen Lancer in pieces. However the Queen was still able to have a final laugh as it shot its stinger out and punctured a hole into on of the ships engines.

"DAMN IT! WE'RE GOING DOWN!" the Pilot tried his best to pull up to get them more elevation but they kept losing altitude. Weiss tried to use her glyphs to slow their descent, but it wasn't enough as the ship ended up crash landing on the shoreside. Weiss crawled out from the wreckage thanks to Deadpool tanking most of the impact.

I can't believe he protected me. Weiss thought as she tried to lift him up, but she was so out of energy she collapsed right away. "Well, well, well. What do we have here?" a voice called out. Weiss looked up to see three figures standing above them, "What do you think boss?"

The leader of the group removed their mask to reveal they were a woman, "I think...we just hit the jackpot." she smiled at Weiss but frowned at Deadpool, "Grab them both."

Several Hours Later...

Deadpool woke up in a cage stripped of everything but his underwear, even his mask was gone. "What the hell? I don't even get the decency of pants?"

"AHH!" Weiss screamed when she saw Deadpool. She quickly cleared her throat and regained her composure, "I'm sorry that was rude of me. I just didn't know you...looked like this." she gestured all over his body, "I mean...you look like a rotting orange."

"Thanks." Deadpool nodded. "How long have we been here?"

Weiss shrugged her shoulders, "Couple days maybe? They recently put you in here, I think they were making sure you didn't have anything on you."

"Believe me, I can tell." Deadpool clicked his tongue and stared out at the bandits. "What do you know about this place? Guards tell you anything?"

Weiss shook her head, "All I know is that they are bandits and a woman named Vernal. I don't know the leader's name, but I have seen her, she always wears this mask kind of like the White Fang."

"I've met her." Deadpool replied, "I bet she's mad about our last match." Deadpool tried looking around for anything of use, but couldn't even find his weapons. "Damn. What have you got, kid? I'm all ears." Weiss checked behind her to make sure nobody was looking and used her semblance to make a mini summon of the armored knight to begin cutting away at the bars. "Guess that's the best we've got, huh?" We are gonna be stuck here forever.

There seemed to be a commotion and Deadpool turned back and noticed the bandits seemed to be preoccupied with something, like some sort of newcomer. This may be our chance. "No kidding. Hurry it up kid, nobody's gonna be paying attention to us." he told Weiss. The, now former, heiress nodded and began to slash at the bars more. "Just...what the hell is going on out there."

"...I said, send me to Qrow DAMMIT!" a voice shouted out. Oh, whoever that is is PISSED.

"That's enough!" one of the bandits shouted, "Don't you dare speak to our leader like that!" there was murmuring from the other bandits before a man was knocked into the tent that was hiding Deadpool and Weiss' cage now revealing them trying to escape.

Weiss squinted as she looked at who the newcomer was, "Wait...Yang?" she asked.

"Weiss?" Yang replied.

"And I'm Deadpool. Now let's get the hell out of here!" Deadpool yelled out.

"I guess subtlety is out." Weiss said, slightly baffled at seeing Yang of all people. She focused her energy in her glyph and made her knight grow in size and bust the cage open. Deadpool grabbed one of the bars and ripped it from the bottom of the cage to make a makeshift staff and the two ran up to join Yang.

"Well, well, well, looks like you've lost complete control of the situation." Deadpool said while pointing at Raven, "The only thing you are in control of now is Jack and Shit...and Jack left town." Raven only groaned in response.

"What the hell is that thing?" Yang asked as the Bandits began to circle the trio.

"That's Deadpool." Weiss replied.

"Oh god, seriously?" Yang asked nearly gagging, "Geez, you look like an avocado had--"

"Sex with an older, more disgusting avocado. I know. I've heard it." Deadpool groaned.

"Why are you even here?" Weiss asked Yang.

Yang motioned to Raven, "Well, that's my mom and she can take me to Ruby."

"YOUR MOM KIDNAPPED ME!?" Weiss yelled out.

Yang blinked a few times trying to process what she heard, "You KIDNAPPED HER!?" Raven didn't respond, instead the Bandits began to circle around the trio more before going on the attack. The trio themselves got ready for a fight and even Deadpool swung the staff at one of the Bandits coming for them.

Raven gritted her teeth and nodded to Vernal. Suddenly a bolt of lightning shot from the sky and stopped everyone dead in their tracks. "ENOUGH!" Vernal shouted. The trio turned to see Vernal with a frustrated expression.

"Thank you." Raven nodded. "All of you better knock it off, otherwise we'll have Grimm all over our asses!" Raven looked at Deadpool and Weiss and gave a long, exasperated sigh, "Vernal..." she groaned, "Give them their weapons back."

"WHAT!?" Vernal turned to Raven, but when she did all she could see was Raven's rose red eye's staring back telling her she was being serious. Vernal sighed and tossed Weiss back Myrtenaster.

Raven turned to walk inside her tent, but stopped and turned back to her daughter, "Tent. Now." she commanded, "And if you want you're stuff back, you'll follow." The trio followed Raven inside, followed by Vernal. Once inside Raven gave Deadpool his clothes and weapons he had on him. "I'm not even going to bother asking why you had a detonator in your rectum. But you should find all your previous weapons are there. Have to say though...I'm a little disappointed I won't be keeping my trophy. That's a nice set of blades you have with you. Sharper than anything I've seen on remnant, metal stronger than anything here too. No Dust though, which means you're a better swordsman than you look."

Raven motioned for Yang, Weiss and a now dressed Deadpool to take a seat at a table. "Okay," Yang started, "Why did you invite us inside?"

"Well, if you insist on going to Qrow I ask you at least know the truth." Raven explained, "Vernal, get the tea please." Vernal nodded and came back and served tea to Weiss, Yang and Raven. "Thank you Vernal, you may wait outside." Vernal hesitated but left all the same, "As for you...you have your things, do you have to be here?" she asked Deadpool.

Deadpool stood up and tapped Weiss on the shoulder, "Don't leave without me." he whispered. What about stopping the White Fang? "These are Parker's friends. I'll help them with whatever, but once that's done then I'll stop the White Fang." Deadpool walked out of the tent and stood on the opposite side of Vernal. The two stood in silence, barely being able to hear the conversation inside. "You're going to die you know." Deadpool mentioned.

"No shit? Let me guess, fire's hot too right?" Vernal spat out, "Jackass."

"I mean that you staying with her will get you killed in the end." Deadpool explained, "And if you think otherwise you are delusional. For one, I know that 'power' you displayed wasn't yours." Vernal gasped slightly, "It wouldn't make sense. If those powers were yours then it would make you a target and would mean Raven would have to be on the run with no guarentee of escape. She's a survivor, not a fighter. So I can tell that you're actually just a cover because then that gives her a for sure escape plan." Deadpool explained, "You can stay with her if you want, but just know that in the end...you're only a tool of escape in her eyes. A last resort."

Vernal scoffed, "What the hell do you know? She cares for me, I'm not some pet! So shut your mouth about shit you don't understand."

Deadpool looked at Vernal and snickered, "No, I understand pretty well actually. You do you, but just you watch. You're gonna die pretending to be something you're not."

"Deadpool!" Deadpool heard Weiss' voice call out to him from behind the tent.

"Laters." Deadpool said as he headed towards the teens. Once in the back he saw a large red portal with Weiss and Yang standing in front of it.

"We're heading in soon, but Yang is gonna grab her bike." Weiss explained. Deadpool turned to Raven who frowned when their eyes met.

"Okay, let's head out." Yang said as she helped Weiss onto her bike.

"Hey Raven, next time you take off my clothes I hope it's for a more skin on skin relationship." Deadpool chuckled as he went through the portal after the girls.

Deadpool jumped through the portal to see Yang embracing Qrow on top of some sort of balcony overlooking the capital of Mistral. "Oh...it's you." Qrow said with a surprised tone. "I kinda thought you died."

"He can't die." Weiss and Yang groaned in unison.

Qrow chuckled, "Well, why don't you come down." the three followed Qrow inside the building and down the stairs until they reached a door. "Let me...get them ready. I'm back!" he shouted.

"Okay~!" Ruby's voiced shouted back.

Qrow rubbed the back of his neck, "Hey, uh, Ruby!"

"Coming!" she replied. Shortly after being called, Ruby came into the main room where Qrow, Weiss, Yang, and Deadpool stood waiting. Ruby dropped the tray of tea when she saw who was waiting for her, tears building up in her eyes. She recoiled slightly as she thought about what to say, "Yang I...I should have stayed! And I should have talked to you more, but I wasn't sure you wanted me around and--" Ruby stopped when Yang wrapped her arms around her. Soon Weiss joined them as well.

Good call on helping them out. "I just...I couldn't let this go by." Deadpool reached into one of his pouches and gripped Spider-Man's mask, "He wouldn't forgive me if I left them behind." Then I guess we better make him proud.

Epilogue

"And that's how I joined Ruby and the others before we met up in Haven." Deadpool explained while talking to Neo and Peter. Neo stood up and clapped in awe. "Thank you. So, how was your guys' trip?" Neo and Peter looked at each other and shrugged.

"Eh, it was cake." Peter lied, "What, you thought we'd have trouble? HA!"

"Okay, but why did you take his mask?" Blake asked, "Like, what if people found out who he was?"

"I thought he was dead!" Deadpool said defensively, "How the hell would I know he was still alive? He got shot in the chest and had his leg hanging by strings!"

"How did you survive that anyway?" Weiss asked. Peter lifted his finger like he had an answer but realized he didn't so he just kept pointing and opening and closing his mouth despite no words escaping.

Deadpool laughed, "You know, in hindsight I should have known this guy was invincible. I mean, BOTH of his clones have come back from injuries that should have killed them. I mean, Ben was stabbed in the back by a glider and I'm pretty sure Kaine has blown up at least once!"

"There's THREE of them!?" Qrow shouted coming out of his drunken stupor.

"By the way...what's with the country bumpkin?" Peter asked while pointing at Oscar, "Are you guys just...adopting kids or something?" the group all looked at each other unsure how to explain it to him.

"Well..." Ruby started.

"He's kinda..." Nora continued.

"That's Ozpin." Ren finished.

"He can uh...reincarnate into another body after he dies." Jaune explained.

Peter stared at Oscar for a little bit while Oscar smiled nervously and waved, "Yeah okay." he said with a nod.

"What!?" Ruby shouted, "That doesn't sound weird to you!?"

"Ruby...I have been cloned, fought monsters, aliens, mutants, gods, and have traveled to a different universe. A guy who reincarnates isn't that weird, hell it's a religion on Earth!" Peter smiled, "Sup, Oz! Sorry for not recognizing you. Hope the new dude can hack it." he smiled. "Oh my god...OZ-CAR, OZ-PIN! IT'S SO OBVIOUS!" Neo hit Peter on the shoulder and smirked at him followed by motioning her hands in a way that asked 'Been holding onto that one for a while'? "Shut up shortstack." Yang groaned and left for the kitchen. What's up with her? Peter asked.

Peter got up and followed Yang to the kitchen where she snacked on whatever chips were left in the chip bag. "H-Hey?" Peter said nervously.

"Hey..." Yang said quietly.

Peter could feel the tension in the air, he couldn't quite think of a way to overcome it. "I...just wanted to let you know that I really missed you."

Yang pressed her face into Peter's chest, "It isn't fair!" she sobbed, "I spent months trying to get over everything, to get over you! I thought I was doing fine...but now you're back and...everything hurts." Yang's false arm trembled as she gripped his shirt, "I thought I grew but in the end I'm still the same. My temper, my feelings, the only thing that changed was my arm. What...what do I do?"

Peter gripped Yang, "We'll work through it...together. I was gone, that was my fault. I should have been there to help. But I'm here now, and I don't want to leave you again." Yang looked at Peter and could feel the determination in his voice. She started leaning forward towards his face and he did the same.

"Ahem!" the two stopped when they were interrupted by Qrow calling for their attention, "I don't mean to be 'that guy' but we have some important issues to discuss. Like our next move and when we'll be heading to Atlas."

Yang and Peter looked at each other and nodded, "Right." Peter agreed, "Let's make a 'Welcome Card' for Jimmy."

End.