Chapter 1

She had been sitting in the back of the theatre, alone and purposefully isolated. There she stayed, her head in her book while tears silently dripped onto the page. Earlier she had begun to read to distract her ever active brain but it didn't do much and the little concentration she did have before had been soiled by the tears which obstructed her view of the words. No one even seemed to notice, that, was completely fair though. Not only was she very unimportant she had put herself in the back so no one would notice her. It was like she was sinking into the shadows of the room. That was one of her worst fears, that one day she would just succumb to the darkness around her and not return. Her brain was too fast almost like she couldn't keep up with the constant whirlpool of dread and anxiety the mess she called a mind had created. Whenever she went outside she though about how she must look to people, normal, unremarkable just a was like the thin veil of a pokerface she shambles together each day was just enough to illude to the fact she wanted attention. But she never sought that attention no matter how much she wanted to. She didn't deserve recognition it wasn't something she willed herself to have. It wasn't like people would want to go out of their way to help her if they couldn't tell she needed help. It was an endless dilemma like a snake eating its own tail to satiate it's next to her, the seat to her left got pushed down.

"Hey, mind if I sit here I don't have anyone to sit with either."

"Oh um no yeah I mean that's fine hehe" She babbled, the first person she'd talked to from school in ages and she responded like that! He might as well just get up and say,

'Nope, sorry, actually nevermind you're a nerd byee' but, even after that sorry display he stuck around.

She felt, well she was never really good at feeling, pushing everything you feel down till you can't take it anymore and collapsing into a ball to cry was more her style. She felt, happy like, nervous as heck and so, so scared to mess up around someone who had given her a chance but happy nonetheless. It was crazy. Who would ever think while at the first rehearsal of the school play to sit next to the edgelord in the back who couldn't possibly be good at acting or singing and who definitely wasn't pretty. Yet here he was. Sitting next to that edgelord. Whispering sarcastic jokes about the over the top drama teacher and the two mains who were absolutely eachother how they loved acting and even though grease was just a little old it was a good musical regardless.

At some point in this mess of a conversation they had exchanged names, that was quite a forgettable part of the conversation. You know just a quick,

"Oh yeah I'm Noel by the way."

"Haha, oh yeah, sorry, my bad, I'm Nadine" Nadine's face hurt from smiling she hadn't smiled in a while, or laughed, or been able to call someone a potential friend. An hour later when the rehearsal ended they said their goodbyes,

"Hey Noel", "Yeah?", "Thanks for sitting with me, we should do it again , iat knext rehearsal, if you want to I mean"

"I'll see you tomorrow then, this was fun"

They turned, "Bye" and Nadine waved.

Now Nadine would never, EVER admit this, but when she turned from him and started the trek home she beamed the biggest, goofiest grin the world would ever see. Did that really just happen oh my gosh, did she just make a friend? She thought she was a huge dork in that moment but she couldn't care less. For the first time in years she had something to look forward to.

The next morning Nadine actually awoke on time, she usually slept through her alarm but today she hadn't.

"Weird" she thought, but yesterday wasn't exactly normal either. Wait, would she see Noel at school? She didn't know his form or any of his classes but .maybe she'll spot him, it couldn't be that hard. Especially with his dorky backpack, it was a Gameboy backpack with a printed out picture of Yoshi's island in the front pocket with was green, translucent plastic. Honestly it was super cool and very easy to spot in a crowd.

Nadine was never late for school the anxiety of walking into a classroom and not knowing what was going on or what the lesson was even about terrified her so she always left super early. Ya know, just in case. The walk to school was the same as always no one actually walks to school at eight so she just listened to her songs playlist on her phone while keeping her eyes glued to her feet.

After actually arriving at school it was the normal sight year sevens and eights running around causing a general ruckus, year tens slinking around in the halls to go join their friends, large, established friend groups of year elevens laughing and joking on their way to form and my year, year nine well they're just loud, like they're inviting people to watch what they're doing. That always bothered her about her form, they want the spotlight on them at all times even though none were particularly interesting or talented in any fields.

Nadines form tutor was a woman in her mid forties called miss Black. She wore her short, damaged, blond hair out, it seemed straightened too. The clothes the teacher wore were always bright almost to a sickening degree, like a rainbow had vomited all over a bunch of black dresses she had and she left it to spoil even more for months and then out on the dress. Ew okay maybe that description was a bit off putting. Miss Blacks wardrobe consisted of long hoop earings and ugly necklaces matched with equally ugly dresses that were black with splotches of what looked like highlighter fluid all over them. Needles to say that woman had no fashion sense.

One other downside of miss black is her inability to stop talking, I've never had a tutor session where she hasn't talked the class' collectives ear off for fifteen minutes. Today was certainly different Nadine had spaced out a while ago but from the fragments of speech she had picked up miss black was complaining about her children. The bell sounded and Nadine sped out of that room quicker than she had ever walked in her life she then checked her timetable she had English ugh really first period?

Now Nadine had never hated English infa t she really enjoyed reading and writing but her English teacher had gotten really seriously ill and hadn't been in for weeks and being passed around from sub to sub doesn't teach you anything. Her classes were all boring English then history then drama, science and Spanish the day went by quite quickly which was strange because Nadine's days always dragged on. But maybe it was because she had something to look forward to, seeing her new friend, Noel. After her Spanish lesson ended Nadine made her way to the hall and took her usual seat in the back away from everyone rlse. Then Noel arrived he came in and once he saw Nadine is smiled, waved and walked up the steps you reach the seat next to her.

"Can I sit here?" He said just like he had the previous day.

"Because I'm going to say no to you haha sit down you dork"

"Hey I'm not a dork! And even if I am what does that make you?"

"A mega dork" Nadine says with a monotone voice and her best poker face on.

"What a dead pan answer

"it's true though"

"Maybe we're both mega dorks" he says "yeah we totally are " before I could ask him how his day was our drama teacher miss walshe interrupted the chatter in the hall,

"Alright everyone come down to the front few rows please!"

"She always sounds so chipper it's kinda creepy,"

"I KNOW, right?" The pair of teenagers sit themselves at the end of the third row on the left when someone comes over and sits one seat away from nadine.

"Hey Noel is this your girlfriend, nice she's really cute good job dude!" This particular testosterone filled twat was named jack he was in Noel's form and Nadine's drama class and he was a giant asshole.

"Piss off jack" "No need to be rude Noel," he says "I'm gonna get you back for that sass. Nadine was having none of it she stood up and, well she pushed him over. At first she couldn't believe she had but she decided to just sit back down, Noel was dead,"Wheeze- did you oh my god Nadine aHA" he couldn't breathe.

"Hey, don't push me you bitch!"

"Jack out now " called miss walshe from the front of the room and with one final glare he walked out."Sorry about that everyone well our cast has already been cut down hasn't it on auditions night there could have been almost a hundred kids and now look at us two rehearsals in and there's only fifty something left. Well to everyone here thanks for sticking around, now today we are going to be going through this scene" miss walshe explained the scene but me and Noel weren't in it so miss walshe told all the people who weren't in the scene to go to one of the corners in the room and do a team building exercise. We had to sit in a circle and introduce ourselves one by one. One of the kids stood up stood up "h-hi I'm Harrison I'm 14 and I'm playing Eugene" he was sat next to Nadine which means that she had to go next which was stressing her out beond belief, then when she stood up Noel stood up with her "I'm Noel and I play Vince fontain" "and I'm Nadine, I play Marty hehe" then they both sat down "ohmygodthankyouuuu" Noel chuckled "Nadine you looked like you were about to flee obviously I'm gonna help my friend if they need it" "and you're welcome" they spent the rest of the evening laughing and joking they even began to talk to some people. Yeah really like that Harrison kid from earlier he was actually pretty nice and he was from America so he had some interesting trivia on the county. The pair also talked to Abby and Jodie two girls who were playing miss linch and the vice principal they were both super fun and really nice. Noel said that they created the awkward kids club which everyone laughed at. By the end of the hour and a half the five had become quite the rag tag group of miss fits.

They all said their goodbyes and then separated for the walk home, surprisingly none of them could walk home together because Noel walked to the left Nadine walked to the right Abby got in her grandads car Jodie walked down the other path with her sister and Harrison went home with his dad.

Before Nadine had known it a week and a half had past each of the five friends had become quite close epecially Noel and Nadine they had miraculously become best friends . They were stuck together by the hip every class they shared together they had been able to convince the tea her to let them sit together because of how well they worked together and when traversing the halls at break and lunch the pair would meet up with Abby Jodie and Harrison and then walk around as a group. Nadine had always sat alone at lunch so when she got to sit at the table in the corner that Abby and Jodie had claimed ages ago it felt like a dream.

To have people to talk to and joke around with it was really incredible Nadine had been in that school for three years and yet she had had more fun than she ever did beforehand.