I just kinda wish you were gay

It was one of the first Monday mornings of the year and as insufferable as Monday's can be, it seemed to be getting worse. The girls were hanging out on the bottom of some steps and Michelle was sure that Erin and Clare had finally gone mental. She wasn't sure when exactly it was that they started arguing about whether homework was "good for the mind" or some bullshit and honestly, she'd had enough of it. Sure, she had been tuning most of it out but Michelle had already spent a big chunk of the morning ignoring the James when he was going on and on about some Doctor Who (honestly, why should she care about his weird visit to the doctor's?) and she was also a bit hungover so she was already spent on having to ignore nonsense for the day.

"Seriously, are you two going to be done soon or should I just go ahead and start looking for another group of weirdos to hang out with?" Michelle looked at both of her self-righteous blonde-haired friends and raised one of her penciled-in eyebrows, challenging them to say something but Erin and Clare were never as quick-witted as Michelle so they simply shared a look and decided not to engage. "I didn't even know we had homework, Clare you're gonna let me copy yours later, yeah?" The smaller of the blondes was about to start preaching to Michelle about how copying homework isn't a very good idea when Orla suddenly appeared from down the hallway and everyone realized they hadn't seen the taller girl since they got off of the bus. Orla was eating from a small bag of some very salty looking chips and while also simultaneously holding a lollipop between her fingers just the way she holds cigarettes for her dear mam.

"Orla, you couldn't think to get me some as well?" pouted Erin.

"Aye, I did but I ran out of punts, Erin. I stuck all of them in at once and the vending machine only let me pick one thing, I think it's broken." Erin simply rolled her eyes, not wanting to tell her cousin that she was the one that broke the poor machine and now they will probably be snack-less for who knows how long. The rest of the group also took note of this and shared solemn looks between each other as the bell rang. They all stood up and decided to meet up at their usual spot come lunch time and took off to get to class.

The first half of their classes somehow seemed to draw out slower than Jenny's "informative" class meetings but now the girls (and boy) were headed to the cafeteria for lunch. Erin was going on about some girl that wore a denim jacket to school instead of her blazer and how that was Erin's idea "first", prompting Clare to add that it was actually "their" idea. Michelle on the other hand was wondering if downing a couple of shots this morning would've helped her drown these other two out. James was trying to talk to Orla about an assignment but she kept telling him to repeat his sentences, finding it hard to understand his weird accent.

"For the last time, Orla, my accent's not Indonesian!" Orla gave James a weird look and simply decided she'd try to decipher his weird dialect later. They were about to get to the cafeteria when they passed the vending machines which was surrounded by a crowd and it seemed to be getting bigger and angrier by the minute.

"How's a girl supposed to survive without chocolate all day, like!" The girls turned to whoever had said that and all simultaneously went wide eyed when they realized it was Big Mandy herself. They all shared a look and immediately turned around and started on their way into the cafeteria when-

"Oi! Didn't I see one of ya messing with it this morning?" The girls all stopped in their tracks. "You, with the curly hair, I saw you standing here this morning!" Orla turned around along with her group of friends and was about to speak when she was suddenly cut off by Michelle.

"Aye, it was James!" Every single person turned to look at Michelle and she internally cursed at herself and her poor impulse control. She pulled a very startled James so that he was standing beside her and slapped him on the shoulder. "Come on now, dickface, fess up!"

"It wasn't me! I don't even like any of that nasty stuff!" The wee English fella was about to have another emotional breakdown when Big Mandy spoke up.

"I was actually talking about the curly haired girl, not the uh, other curly haired girl," she said as she shot James an agitated look. Orla was again about to speak up when Michelle shoved Erin and gave her a rushed look.

"Orla's got high cholesterol so it couldn't have been her!" Erin finally spoke up having gained the courage to look Big Mandy in the eyes and... was she looking a bit more Schizo than usual? She found that all of the courage she had suddenly gained to defend her dear cousin was now fading and she looked at Michelle for some help. Michelle was too overcome with fear when Clare finally started blabbering. Seriously, that girl's anxiety can either be really unhelpful at times or seriously help them out of trouble every now and then. Which of either of these was about to happen? They can never tell.

"It wasn't any of us! We're all doing a fast for the starving African kids! We haven't had anything to eat in the past 15 hours and I can't really see any shapes right now to be frank so even if we did want to eat anything from the vending machine I'm not sure that we would even be able to see where it is so..." Clare realized she was talking at an inhuman speed so she stopped and looked around at everyone around her. Her friends had the usual looks of confusion and concern, while everyone else simply looked at her like she had just eaten an entire jar of peanut butter by herself (that's just a figure of speech, I promise).

"Jesus Clare, can you warn us next time you're about to have another cack attack?" Michelle scolded Clare and turned to Big Mandy once more, "look, before you go all King Kong on all of us, at least hear us out yeah?" Big Mandy was now stepping closer to the group rather menacingly but didn't say anything. She seemed to be waiting for someone to speak but everyone was too afraid to say anything except...

"Aye, the vending machine wasn't broken when I used it this morning, do you mind this morning, Erin?" Everything was quiet aside from a couple of "oohs" and a few gasps. Big Mandy pushed the girls aside to get closer to the tallest girl of the group who surprisingly was not too far off from her eye level, what with a school full of girls that are never more than half her size. Orla simply stared back unfazed until she suddenly realized she was in a bit of trouble.

"So it was you?" Orla had no chance to even think of a reply before someone in the crowd started shouting.

"Fight, fight!" The girls immediately reacted to this and finally broke out of their daze. Michelle grabbed Orla by the hand and pulled her back while Erin and the rest of them stood in front of her in a very protective manner that was anything but intimidating.

A very nervous Erin spoke up first, "So here's the thing, you can start knocking our heads together right now or we can figure this out. There's more than enough chocolate in the world to go around but I'm afraid there's only one Orla." Big Mandy didn't even think about this proposition (at least mull it over, seriously) and kept her gaze on Orla as she stepped forward to try to get to her when Michelle smacked her hand away. Clare turned to look at Michelle like she had just smacked Jesus Christ himself.

"Michelle! What did you just do?!"

Michelle's expression was currently one of anger and a little bit of fear (don't tell anyone), but Michelle is one of the few people who don't get intimidated by Finnoula so this shouldn't be much different, right? It's just a much bigger, taller Finnoula that doesn't smell like vinegar and grease. She quickly hyped herself up and took a deep breath.

"Look, I will bring you loads of chocolate every single morning until they fix the motherfuckin' machine, yeah? I'm talking tons, stacks of it. Just back off, go climb up your giant beanstalk and I'll bring the first stash tomorrow." Everyone held their breath. Big Mandy kept glaring at Michelle and then back to Orla and then the rest of the girls.

"Just as long as you keep your word then," and that was it. Big Mandy walked off, parting the dispersing crowd of catholic girls like the Red Sea, leaving the girls both astonished and relieved. They sat down at the steps of the nearest staircase and breathed a well-timed sigh of relief. Michelle was still pumping with adrenaline, she started wringing her fingers and her leg started tapping uncontrollably, the rest of the girls noticed this and shared a look.

"You know, I think you might've just earned yourself some serious street cred, standing up to Big Mandy and all that," Erin said playfully and nudged Michelle, who couldn't help but snort at Erin's horrible attempt to cheer her up. The tension was now gone and they all sat quietly, taking in the sound of the loud cafeteria and the very weird events that had just happened. A few minutes passed, and the very comfortable ambience was cut short.

"You know Michelle, I don't think you really needed to pledge to bring her 'stacks' of chocolate. You could've just offered to bring her one bar every single day," said James as he looked around at the girls, suddenly making Michelle aware of what could've been an avoidable inconvenience. She realized he was right, why did she even say that? "Stacks" of chocolate? She could've saved herself some serious cash. Michelle decided to not give this any more thought though, she just turned to him and gave him one of her usual scowls.

"Shut your hole, dickface."

It was finally Friday morning and the girls wandered around Pete's Wee Shop, looking around for their favorite candy and inspecting it to see if it was stale, which was unfortunately a routine they had learned to do over the years. Clare and James were marveling at some new container full of candy they had never seen before and wondered if they should really risk spending their money on some weird candy that might not even be worth it. Erin was already done picking her snacks for the morning and was following Orla around, who was still looking around even though she had her own baggie stuffed full of the weirdest combinations of candy that can't possibly taste good mixed together like that. Michelle on the other hand was waiting for her friends to hurry up and finish, she just gathered as much chocolate as she could afford for the day and wondered how much longer she would have to do this. She had asked Sister Michael to please make sure someone was onto fixing the vending machine but she's not sure the nun had even heard her, as she just waved Michelle off and proceeded to giggle at her copy of Stephen King's It.

The dark-haired girl wondered how many bottles of vodka she could've bought instead with all this wasted money, she was starting to come up with the theory that Big Mandy is so massive because of all the chocolate she probably consumes. There has to be some science behind that, she pondered. Her thoughts were interrupted as the girls made their way towards her, laughing about some silly thing the store owner had said to them. They made their way to the bus stop and went about their usual antics while they waited for the bus to show up. While Clare and Erin had suddenly started ranting about something school related, Orla startled Michelle out of her thoughts and tapped her on the shoulder. Observant honey-doused eyes peered into startled blue-green eyes, and Michelle wasn't sure if Orla had really giggled just now or if her mind had made that up somehow. The tall curly-haired girl seemed to be having a million thoughts rushing through her head, as usual, but none of them were coming out of her mouth. Michelle suddenly felt vulnerable somehow, and decided to break up whatever uh, whatever this was. She reached towards Orla and abruptly grabbed a handful of sweets out of her bag, shoving as many as she could into her mouth.

"Do you mind? I'm trying to eat something here." Michelle tried very hard to sound those words out but sadly they came out muffled and she was secretly trying not to choke right now, seriously how many different kinds of candy is this girl putting in that bag? Meanwhile, Orla had finally broken eye contact and looked down at her bag of sweets, reaching down and eating some herself while she looked around at nothing in particular. The dark-haired girl noticed how quickly the taller girl's aura had changed but decided not to think much of it since the girl is known for being so odd.

"I've been wanting to say thank you for saving me from Big Mandy and her massive gorilla hands, but I kept forgetting." Michelle snorted at Orla's phrasing, only to realize the tall girl wasn't laughing with her and was being completely serious.

"Oh I mean, yeah sure that's no bother. I honestly was just trying to stop her from going all 'hulk smash' on the entire school, Clare was shittin' herself as it was." Orla appeared to be analyzing Michelle once again and this time it was starting to irritate her, she couldn't figure out what the deal was. "Look, I'm not one to get sappy and neither are you so just move on, alright? You've said your thanks so just keep it moving, Curly." Orla furrowed her eyebrows at this, taken aback by the sudden hostility, but she remembered who she was talking to and shrugged it off. She reached into her blazer pocket and reached out to hand Michelle a bag stuffed full of candy. The shorter girl took it and looked up at Orla with a questioning look.

"I don't know what candy you fancy so I put a little bit of everything in there, I call it Unicorn Vomit." The taller girl fished around her pocket once more, this time pulling out a massive lollipop (seriously, how did that fit in there) and started unwrapping it as she walked off to line up as the bus rounded the corner. The dark haired girl frowned at the small paper bag, it was so full it was a small tear away from falling apart. James noticed his cousin had been quiet for a while now which was unusual for her and made his way towards her.

"How much longer do you think you'll have to keep this going?" Michelle was still staring intently at the bag of candy in her hand that James had gestured to, still distraught. The sound of her classmates being rowdy caused her to finally look up and she caught a glimpse of long golden-brown curls boarding the bus.

"I'm not sure."

A/N: This is my first attempt at writing fic so please be nice to me. Let me know what ya'll think! I plan on doing a series of one shots so feel free to give me any ideas if you have any!