LSE // 5-3-03
(Last Chance - The Message)
rated: PG13 - language, content (warning: dark)
shounen-ai/yaoi
The Message
-
Hanging his jacket on the rack with a sigh, Heero looked around the
apartment as if expecting someone to greet him. Of course, there was
no one, and he shut the door with more force than necessary in
reaction to the foolishness of even thinking there would be someone.
"Baka Heero," he chided softly, moving into the apartment. Half way
across the living room, however, he noticed a blinking red light.
Turning slowly, Heero stared in disbelief at the answering machine,
perched smugly atop the coffee table. He never had messages; the only
reason he even had the device was that it had been a gift from Relena
on their last anniversary. And he had been meaning to throw the
worthless contraption out for months.
Cautiously, as if expecting the machine to explode, Heero pushed the
little round 'play' button. The speakers emitted a sharp 'beep!' and
then there was silence. Heero sighed in annoyance and reached for the
delete button, vaguely disappointed, but his hand froze an inch away.
"...Heero? Oh. Hey, guess you aren't home. God, I feel so stupid..."
"Duo?" he asked out loud, even though he new perfectly well he was
talking to a recorded message. Even digital, even recorded, the voice
was unmistakable. However... Heero frowned, staring at the machine
and silently begging for the message to keep going.
"I'm sorry for bothering you. I really thought you'd be home..." Duo
sighed, a sad, desperate sound. "Damn, I wish there was a way to just
delete this. Oh, never mind. Just... sorry for bothering you."
Stunned, Heero stared at the machine long after the message had
beeped to a close. What was Duo calling him for? And sounding so...
Heero fumbled over words and discovered he couldn't pin down the
exact emotion. When was the last time he'd even spoken to the braided
baka? Or, seen him, for that matter.
Unable to resist, Heero played the message again. Not since the war
had Heero really spent time with the American pilot. The war... Heero
sighed, running a hand through his unruly chocolate hair and walking
away from the answering machine. Duo's voice stayed with them,
however, teasing and haunting despite his efforts to forget. Heero
had been trying to forget ever since the war... what, five years ago?
Six? So many...
"We were just boys," Heero growled to himself. Only 15, and Duo had
seemed to think there was something more than physical relief in
their frequent nights together. War was stressful, and boys needed
certain comforts, even soldiers. And after the war, Duo had thought
there could be a future. Heero shook his head at the memory, suddenly
aware of how cold and cruel the rejection must have been.
But surely Duo had moved on? Especially when word got out that Relena
and Heero were together, much to the surprise of the world leaders.
Relena, the pacifist Queen, and Heero, quite possibly the most
violent and brutal of the Gundam pilots. How many years? Heero had
lost track.
Duo must have moved on. Quatre, in efforts to keep the pilots
connected, liked to through spontaneous parties. Heero and Relena
attended early on, but not in the past year, not after the engagement
announcement. Relena seemed convinced the other Gundam pilots gave
her the cold shoulder and glared when Heero wasn't around. Relena was
a smart girl; she knew the look in Duo's eye.
Pressing his forehead to the glass, Heero gazed out at the city
skyline, wondering if Duo was out there somewhere. ...What was he
thinking? Relena deserved better... But, Relena didn't own him
anymore. Heero stared down at his hand, devoid of the gold engagement
ring it had born for so long.
Turning suddenly, Heero stormed across the room and snatched the
answering machine from the table. Unplugging the phone cord in the
back, he glared down at the device before throwing it across the room.
It skittered over the carpet and bounced harmlessly off the way,
mocking Heero. No more Relena.
His hands, the traitors, picked up the phone and dialed the operator.
When she answered, all polite 'how may I assist you,' it took Heero a
moment to figure out what to ask. "Maxwell. Duo. In the city?"
"One moment please," she chirped perkily. "Would you like me to
connect you?"
"Uh, yes," Heero started to pace. What was he going to say? The
operator clicked off and the phone began to ring. Once... twice... On
the fifth ring, Heero hung up angrily and nearly slammed the phone on
to the table. Not home, and Duo probably didn't have an answering
machine purchased by an ex-fiancee lying around.
Heero paused, then slowly glanced out the window again. In the corner,
the half-broken answering machine gave a forlorn beep and Duo's voice,
sounding slightly worse for wear, suddenly burst forth.
"...Heero? Oh. Hey, guess you aren't home. God, I feel so stupid..."
Quietly, Heero pocketed his keys and slipped his jacket back on. The
message was still playing when he left.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
6F
Heero glanced down to the phone book page he had 'borrowed' from a
phone booth and confirmed the neat line of text. There was only one
Duo Maxwell in the city, and this was the listed address. Shoving the
ripped page into his back pocket, Heero cautiously lifted one hand
and rapped on the smooth oak surface.
The building looked nice... not much in the way of security, but
nice. Heero paused, then knocked on the door again. No answer came
from inside, not even a shuffle of footsteps. Frowning, Heero reached
out and, on a whim, tried the knob. The door swung open easily,
unlocked and loose on its hinges. Shocked, Heero stared into the
apartment, which looked barren and abandoned. For a moment, he
thought perhaps Duo had moved recently and the phone book had yet to
update its listing, but he noted the small touches that spoke of an
occupant. Duo still lived here.
Stepping inside hesitantly, Heero called out, "Duo! Are you home?"
From the other room, he caught the sounds of running water and
fumbling, followed promptly by Duo appearing in the doorway. A towel
wrapped securely around his waist and another bundled atop his head,
Duo stopped in mid-step and stared at Heero in shock. "He-heero!" he
finally cried, venturing out into the living room. "That really you?"
"You - uh - called?" Heero forced himself to look only at Duo's face
and not the finely built, slim chest and -- what was he doing? Heero
accredited his temptation to memories and loneliness from Relena's
not-to-recent departure from his life. And good riddance to her...
"What?" Duo blinked in confusion, "Oh, that. Forget it, I wasn't
really thinking straight... Uh, come in! Come in. Let me just..." Duo
vanished, voice fading off.
Heero awkwardly closed the door and entered fully into the apartment.
Moving crates were stacked in the center of the room, and he chose a
sturdy-looking one to sit upon. Taking the opportunity to look around
more, Heero was disturbed by what he saw. Even taking into account
Duo looked ready to move, the apartment had a... Heero shook his head,
unable to place the vibe he was getting. "Vibe?" he muttered out loud
in disgust. Heero Yuy did not get 'vibes.'
"Yeah, just sit anywhere. Sorry about the mess," Duo said with a weak
smile, walking back into the living room. One fluffy white towel was
still wrapped around his head, securely the long chestnut hair Heero
knew lay beneath, but the other had been forsaken in favor of a robe.
Duo was just flicking closed the sash when he walked in, momentarily
exposing lean muscles and a pair of simple cotton boxers.
Heero looked away politely, "The phone book. Are you moving?"
Duo laughed, "Observant as always. Not exactly moving as just...
leaving. Vacation," he explained with another low laugh, but the tone
sent a chill over Heero's spine. "Would you like a drink? I think I
have a bottle of bubbly somewhere in that kitchen..."
"Uh, yes. Please," Heero nearly kicked himself. Why was he acting
so... juvenile? This entire visit was a bad idea. He should have just
ignored that stupid answering machine and watched brainless television
until falling asleep to paid-programming. But, the message, and Duo
had sounded so...
"Here we are," Duo said brightly, walking back in with two glasses of
pale, sparkling champagne. "Bottoms up!"
Heero took a small sip, but Duo merely set his glass aside without so
much as a taste. About to comment, Heero opened his mouth, but the
look on Duo's face stopped him. "What is it?" he asked instead,
staring in confusion at the gaze levelled at him. "Duo?"
The American laughed the same chilling laugh and sat across from
Heero, pulling up a moving crate to perch atop. "You've changed some,
since the war. I bet you're not even carrying a gun."
"No, Relena never liked..."
"Ah," Duo interrupted softly, "Relena. Let's not talk about that. I
bet you're curious as to why I called, huh? God, it's so different,
actually looking at you... Your eyes, hm? I always liked your eyes.
Your lips. Your hair. Oh, hell, Heero, I liked every bit of you."
"...D-Duo?"
"You're right. I'm rambling," Duo grinned, leaning back some to rake
his eyes slowly over the full length of Heero. "But, you look good. I
mean that. No, I'm sorry, I'll be serious now. I wanted to just tell
you over the phone, because it's so much easier when I don't have to
look at you. But, you weren't home. I bet that was a weird message.
What did I say?"
Duo kept right on going without pausing for an answer, "It doesn't
matter now anyway. I weighed myself, you know, just to be sure. At
least, I hope the scale was correct. It's going to suck if I was off
by a few pounds. But, I thought of that already. Poor Heero, you look
so confused! I'll start over. And keep it simple. Remember what it
was like during the war? Hell, right? Not the violence and the
missions, Heero, not that war, but that other. Ours. Us. Me, you. Sex.
Great sex. I was happy. So happy... I kept thinking, after this is all
over, me and Heero can settle down somewhere peaceful. Just me
and Heero. Where there is no war."
"Duo..." Heero sighed, shaking his head slowly.
"No, listen. It's important. You obviously felt differently. Or else
we wouldn't even be here right now. We'd be off fucking in some
tropical paradise. Or something. I'm getting side-tracked." Duo
leaned in slightly, his arms resting lazily across his knees. "So,
you went off with Relena and that was it between us. I guess you
thought I'd get over you, huh? I don't know what you felt, but I
never saw our nights together as anything less than heaven. God,
Heero, couldn't you see it? I thought it was so obvious. I loved you.
I was head over heels in love with you. But, Relena, and you never
loved me, did you?"
"Duo! Stop it," Heero cried in anguished, unable to hear those words
being delivered in such a hopeless, defeated way. Duo blinked,
sitting back some and staring at Heero as if the Japanese boy had just
grown a third arm. "I'm sorry, Duo, for the past. Let's not dwell..."
"Oh, easy for you to say!" Duo raged, eyes narrowing into a powerful
glare. "You've have Relena to forget yourself in; I haven't. Nothing,
Heero, nothing could take away the pain of losing you. Sex, drugs,
alcohol, wild parties with all three combined; anything, everything,
to just stop thinking. I tried it all. Nothing. Every minute I
thought of you. I couldn't escape. Yeah, we were young, and it was
rough in the war, but I knew you were my soul mate. No one else could
ever make me as happy as when I was with you."
Heero crossed his arms, desperately trying to hug some control into
himself. Why was Duo doing this to him? What purpose did it serve,
all these painful memories? "You should have told me..."
Eye glinting, Duo laughed that same, spine-chilling laugh that spoke
of desperation and heartbreak. "Told you? Heero, you are so cute
sometimes. It never occurred to me you felt differently until
Relena... and then it was just too late. Told you? Told you..." Duo
suddenly looked defeated, staring down at the worn carpeting, "Yeah.
I should have told you. Would it have made a difference, though?
Don't bother answering; I already know. It wouldn't have mattered,
except maybe making it easier now."
"I'm sorry, Duo," Heero said weakly, feeling as if Duo had just
written EVIL BASTARD across his forehead. Which was true. How could
he have not noticed Duo's feelings? But, that was the past, and Heero
made it his policy to live in the present.
"It doesn't matter. How can I stay mad at you? This was suppose to
happen over the phone, you know. But you weren't home. I left a note,
of course. I guess I like this better. I get to see your face. It
really is a pretty face. No, handsome. That's it. Handsome. Sexy. Oh,
Heero, can't you guess? I still love you. I never stopped loving you.
I never will stop loving you. You, go, be happy. Marry Relena."
Heero frowned, suddenly aware of the slight change in Duo's
mannerisms. They were too controlled and precise. And... the young
man's voice stumbled slightly. He glanced to the still untouched
champagne glass sitting on the floor. It sounded as if Duo was drunk,
but... that still didn't seem right. Heero knew those symptoms well,
and none accurately applied.
"Duo," Heero cast his gaze helplessly around the room. "Duo, did no
one tell you? I'm not marrying Relena. Everything's over between us."
Far from looking pleased at the news, Duo's eyes flew wide and his
face went white as a sheet. "Wha...what?" he breathed, "you're not...
marrying her? It's over?"
"Yes. Nearly three months ago. No one told you? I thought, I mean,
it's not on the news yet, but Quatre..." Heero stopped talking, aware
that he was rambling and sounding pathetic to boot.
"No, no one told me," Duo whispered, still looking pale and stunned.
Heero frowned; he'd expected Duo to be thrilled at the news. There
was still hope that... with a silent growl, Heero cut that thought
off. "You mean, you're not marrying Relena? Oh... wow. I really wish
I'd known that..." Duo laughed weakly. "God, this is so not funny."
"Duo?"
Slowly, Duo raised his eyes to meet Heero's and offered a small smile,
"I'm really sorry. Things weren't suppose to work out this way."
"Duo, you're scaring me."
"Ironic way to go, huh?"
"...to go?" Heero echoed, staring at Duo with the horror of dawning
realization. "What did you do? Duo!" The American slid forward to his
knees and Heero quickly caught him, alarmed at how pale Duo was.
"Thanks for listening," Duo murmured, eyes half-closed. "Come again."
"Duo!" Heero cried, frantically looking around the apartment for an
idea of what on Earth was happening. "What did you do?!"
Feeling as if the ground had just been jerked out from under him,
Heero leapt to his feet and looked around for a telephone. A doctor.
There had to be a phone somewhere; Duo had called him, after all. His
search resulted in nothing, and all the while the pit of worry in
Heero's stomach grew. Finally, he checked the one place he hadn't yet
for the telephone; the bathroom.
Snapping the light on, Heero stared passively at the counter before
him, strewn with empty pill bottles. Oh, God, Duo...! Spotting the
phone, nestled there against the cabinet, Heero snatched it up and
started to dial emergency with shaking fingers.
For a moment, Heero simply stared at the phone in shock, unable to
realize why it was beeping at him. That rapid, annoying beep that
signaled another phone was off the hook somewhere in the house. Heero
snatched up one of the empty orange bottles and stared at the label,
his spinning mind trying to comprehend.
150 milligrams once a day. Zoloft.
God, Duo, is this what you meant by ironic? Duo...
Heero dropped the container and spun, racing back into the living
room and falling to his knees beside the limp form. For a moment he
feared the worst, but a pulse raced beneath his searching fingers.
Fluttering, weak, far too fast. He had to do something, anything.
Contact poison control. Phone dead.
How long, how long ago did Duo take the pills? How many? Enough to
cause unconsciousness... death... No, not Duo!
Slowly, Heero picked up Duo and stood, alarmed by how light-weight
the frail body felt in his arms. Cradling Duo carefully against his
chest, Heero could only think of one thing: get a doctor.
"Please, Duo, don't die... Don't die..."
-
-
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Author's Notes: This idea tackled me. Beat me unconscious. Left me for
dead and stole my clothes. I never saw it coming. Muah.
...What do you think? Feedback is always eagerly accepted ^_^
Poor, poor Duo. I'm still sick, did you know that? I don't think I'll
ever be well again! x_x This is all part my muses' sick plans, I just
know it! I'm on medication, but it's not really working that
effectively... ugh. Well, let me know what you think!
Feedback/reviews are very much appreciated!
copyright 2003 - Gundam Wing and characters copyright other people.
Email me to join my Update ML!
LSE - Violet Nyte ([email protected])
shameless plug - visit my website for cool "shtuff"
(Last Chance - The Message)
rated: PG13 - language, content (warning: dark)
shounen-ai/yaoi
The Message
-
Hanging his jacket on the rack with a sigh, Heero looked around the
apartment as if expecting someone to greet him. Of course, there was
no one, and he shut the door with more force than necessary in
reaction to the foolishness of even thinking there would be someone.
"Baka Heero," he chided softly, moving into the apartment. Half way
across the living room, however, he noticed a blinking red light.
Turning slowly, Heero stared in disbelief at the answering machine,
perched smugly atop the coffee table. He never had messages; the only
reason he even had the device was that it had been a gift from Relena
on their last anniversary. And he had been meaning to throw the
worthless contraption out for months.
Cautiously, as if expecting the machine to explode, Heero pushed the
little round 'play' button. The speakers emitted a sharp 'beep!' and
then there was silence. Heero sighed in annoyance and reached for the
delete button, vaguely disappointed, but his hand froze an inch away.
"...Heero? Oh. Hey, guess you aren't home. God, I feel so stupid..."
"Duo?" he asked out loud, even though he new perfectly well he was
talking to a recorded message. Even digital, even recorded, the voice
was unmistakable. However... Heero frowned, staring at the machine
and silently begging for the message to keep going.
"I'm sorry for bothering you. I really thought you'd be home..." Duo
sighed, a sad, desperate sound. "Damn, I wish there was a way to just
delete this. Oh, never mind. Just... sorry for bothering you."
Stunned, Heero stared at the machine long after the message had
beeped to a close. What was Duo calling him for? And sounding so...
Heero fumbled over words and discovered he couldn't pin down the
exact emotion. When was the last time he'd even spoken to the braided
baka? Or, seen him, for that matter.
Unable to resist, Heero played the message again. Not since the war
had Heero really spent time with the American pilot. The war... Heero
sighed, running a hand through his unruly chocolate hair and walking
away from the answering machine. Duo's voice stayed with them,
however, teasing and haunting despite his efforts to forget. Heero
had been trying to forget ever since the war... what, five years ago?
Six? So many...
"We were just boys," Heero growled to himself. Only 15, and Duo had
seemed to think there was something more than physical relief in
their frequent nights together. War was stressful, and boys needed
certain comforts, even soldiers. And after the war, Duo had thought
there could be a future. Heero shook his head at the memory, suddenly
aware of how cold and cruel the rejection must have been.
But surely Duo had moved on? Especially when word got out that Relena
and Heero were together, much to the surprise of the world leaders.
Relena, the pacifist Queen, and Heero, quite possibly the most
violent and brutal of the Gundam pilots. How many years? Heero had
lost track.
Duo must have moved on. Quatre, in efforts to keep the pilots
connected, liked to through spontaneous parties. Heero and Relena
attended early on, but not in the past year, not after the engagement
announcement. Relena seemed convinced the other Gundam pilots gave
her the cold shoulder and glared when Heero wasn't around. Relena was
a smart girl; she knew the look in Duo's eye.
Pressing his forehead to the glass, Heero gazed out at the city
skyline, wondering if Duo was out there somewhere. ...What was he
thinking? Relena deserved better... But, Relena didn't own him
anymore. Heero stared down at his hand, devoid of the gold engagement
ring it had born for so long.
Turning suddenly, Heero stormed across the room and snatched the
answering machine from the table. Unplugging the phone cord in the
back, he glared down at the device before throwing it across the room.
It skittered over the carpet and bounced harmlessly off the way,
mocking Heero. No more Relena.
His hands, the traitors, picked up the phone and dialed the operator.
When she answered, all polite 'how may I assist you,' it took Heero a
moment to figure out what to ask. "Maxwell. Duo. In the city?"
"One moment please," she chirped perkily. "Would you like me to
connect you?"
"Uh, yes," Heero started to pace. What was he going to say? The
operator clicked off and the phone began to ring. Once... twice... On
the fifth ring, Heero hung up angrily and nearly slammed the phone on
to the table. Not home, and Duo probably didn't have an answering
machine purchased by an ex-fiancee lying around.
Heero paused, then slowly glanced out the window again. In the corner,
the half-broken answering machine gave a forlorn beep and Duo's voice,
sounding slightly worse for wear, suddenly burst forth.
"...Heero? Oh. Hey, guess you aren't home. God, I feel so stupid..."
Quietly, Heero pocketed his keys and slipped his jacket back on. The
message was still playing when he left.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
6F
Heero glanced down to the phone book page he had 'borrowed' from a
phone booth and confirmed the neat line of text. There was only one
Duo Maxwell in the city, and this was the listed address. Shoving the
ripped page into his back pocket, Heero cautiously lifted one hand
and rapped on the smooth oak surface.
The building looked nice... not much in the way of security, but
nice. Heero paused, then knocked on the door again. No answer came
from inside, not even a shuffle of footsteps. Frowning, Heero reached
out and, on a whim, tried the knob. The door swung open easily,
unlocked and loose on its hinges. Shocked, Heero stared into the
apartment, which looked barren and abandoned. For a moment, he
thought perhaps Duo had moved recently and the phone book had yet to
update its listing, but he noted the small touches that spoke of an
occupant. Duo still lived here.
Stepping inside hesitantly, Heero called out, "Duo! Are you home?"
From the other room, he caught the sounds of running water and
fumbling, followed promptly by Duo appearing in the doorway. A towel
wrapped securely around his waist and another bundled atop his head,
Duo stopped in mid-step and stared at Heero in shock. "He-heero!" he
finally cried, venturing out into the living room. "That really you?"
"You - uh - called?" Heero forced himself to look only at Duo's face
and not the finely built, slim chest and -- what was he doing? Heero
accredited his temptation to memories and loneliness from Relena's
not-to-recent departure from his life. And good riddance to her...
"What?" Duo blinked in confusion, "Oh, that. Forget it, I wasn't
really thinking straight... Uh, come in! Come in. Let me just..." Duo
vanished, voice fading off.
Heero awkwardly closed the door and entered fully into the apartment.
Moving crates were stacked in the center of the room, and he chose a
sturdy-looking one to sit upon. Taking the opportunity to look around
more, Heero was disturbed by what he saw. Even taking into account
Duo looked ready to move, the apartment had a... Heero shook his head,
unable to place the vibe he was getting. "Vibe?" he muttered out loud
in disgust. Heero Yuy did not get 'vibes.'
"Yeah, just sit anywhere. Sorry about the mess," Duo said with a weak
smile, walking back into the living room. One fluffy white towel was
still wrapped around his head, securely the long chestnut hair Heero
knew lay beneath, but the other had been forsaken in favor of a robe.
Duo was just flicking closed the sash when he walked in, momentarily
exposing lean muscles and a pair of simple cotton boxers.
Heero looked away politely, "The phone book. Are you moving?"
Duo laughed, "Observant as always. Not exactly moving as just...
leaving. Vacation," he explained with another low laugh, but the tone
sent a chill over Heero's spine. "Would you like a drink? I think I
have a bottle of bubbly somewhere in that kitchen..."
"Uh, yes. Please," Heero nearly kicked himself. Why was he acting
so... juvenile? This entire visit was a bad idea. He should have just
ignored that stupid answering machine and watched brainless television
until falling asleep to paid-programming. But, the message, and Duo
had sounded so...
"Here we are," Duo said brightly, walking back in with two glasses of
pale, sparkling champagne. "Bottoms up!"
Heero took a small sip, but Duo merely set his glass aside without so
much as a taste. About to comment, Heero opened his mouth, but the
look on Duo's face stopped him. "What is it?" he asked instead,
staring in confusion at the gaze levelled at him. "Duo?"
The American laughed the same chilling laugh and sat across from
Heero, pulling up a moving crate to perch atop. "You've changed some,
since the war. I bet you're not even carrying a gun."
"No, Relena never liked..."
"Ah," Duo interrupted softly, "Relena. Let's not talk about that. I
bet you're curious as to why I called, huh? God, it's so different,
actually looking at you... Your eyes, hm? I always liked your eyes.
Your lips. Your hair. Oh, hell, Heero, I liked every bit of you."
"...D-Duo?"
"You're right. I'm rambling," Duo grinned, leaning back some to rake
his eyes slowly over the full length of Heero. "But, you look good. I
mean that. No, I'm sorry, I'll be serious now. I wanted to just tell
you over the phone, because it's so much easier when I don't have to
look at you. But, you weren't home. I bet that was a weird message.
What did I say?"
Duo kept right on going without pausing for an answer, "It doesn't
matter now anyway. I weighed myself, you know, just to be sure. At
least, I hope the scale was correct. It's going to suck if I was off
by a few pounds. But, I thought of that already. Poor Heero, you look
so confused! I'll start over. And keep it simple. Remember what it
was like during the war? Hell, right? Not the violence and the
missions, Heero, not that war, but that other. Ours. Us. Me, you. Sex.
Great sex. I was happy. So happy... I kept thinking, after this is all
over, me and Heero can settle down somewhere peaceful. Just me
and Heero. Where there is no war."
"Duo..." Heero sighed, shaking his head slowly.
"No, listen. It's important. You obviously felt differently. Or else
we wouldn't even be here right now. We'd be off fucking in some
tropical paradise. Or something. I'm getting side-tracked." Duo
leaned in slightly, his arms resting lazily across his knees. "So,
you went off with Relena and that was it between us. I guess you
thought I'd get over you, huh? I don't know what you felt, but I
never saw our nights together as anything less than heaven. God,
Heero, couldn't you see it? I thought it was so obvious. I loved you.
I was head over heels in love with you. But, Relena, and you never
loved me, did you?"
"Duo! Stop it," Heero cried in anguished, unable to hear those words
being delivered in such a hopeless, defeated way. Duo blinked,
sitting back some and staring at Heero as if the Japanese boy had just
grown a third arm. "I'm sorry, Duo, for the past. Let's not dwell..."
"Oh, easy for you to say!" Duo raged, eyes narrowing into a powerful
glare. "You've have Relena to forget yourself in; I haven't. Nothing,
Heero, nothing could take away the pain of losing you. Sex, drugs,
alcohol, wild parties with all three combined; anything, everything,
to just stop thinking. I tried it all. Nothing. Every minute I
thought of you. I couldn't escape. Yeah, we were young, and it was
rough in the war, but I knew you were my soul mate. No one else could
ever make me as happy as when I was with you."
Heero crossed his arms, desperately trying to hug some control into
himself. Why was Duo doing this to him? What purpose did it serve,
all these painful memories? "You should have told me..."
Eye glinting, Duo laughed that same, spine-chilling laugh that spoke
of desperation and heartbreak. "Told you? Heero, you are so cute
sometimes. It never occurred to me you felt differently until
Relena... and then it was just too late. Told you? Told you..." Duo
suddenly looked defeated, staring down at the worn carpeting, "Yeah.
I should have told you. Would it have made a difference, though?
Don't bother answering; I already know. It wouldn't have mattered,
except maybe making it easier now."
"I'm sorry, Duo," Heero said weakly, feeling as if Duo had just
written EVIL BASTARD across his forehead. Which was true. How could
he have not noticed Duo's feelings? But, that was the past, and Heero
made it his policy to live in the present.
"It doesn't matter. How can I stay mad at you? This was suppose to
happen over the phone, you know. But you weren't home. I left a note,
of course. I guess I like this better. I get to see your face. It
really is a pretty face. No, handsome. That's it. Handsome. Sexy. Oh,
Heero, can't you guess? I still love you. I never stopped loving you.
I never will stop loving you. You, go, be happy. Marry Relena."
Heero frowned, suddenly aware of the slight change in Duo's
mannerisms. They were too controlled and precise. And... the young
man's voice stumbled slightly. He glanced to the still untouched
champagne glass sitting on the floor. It sounded as if Duo was drunk,
but... that still didn't seem right. Heero knew those symptoms well,
and none accurately applied.
"Duo," Heero cast his gaze helplessly around the room. "Duo, did no
one tell you? I'm not marrying Relena. Everything's over between us."
Far from looking pleased at the news, Duo's eyes flew wide and his
face went white as a sheet. "Wha...what?" he breathed, "you're not...
marrying her? It's over?"
"Yes. Nearly three months ago. No one told you? I thought, I mean,
it's not on the news yet, but Quatre..." Heero stopped talking, aware
that he was rambling and sounding pathetic to boot.
"No, no one told me," Duo whispered, still looking pale and stunned.
Heero frowned; he'd expected Duo to be thrilled at the news. There
was still hope that... with a silent growl, Heero cut that thought
off. "You mean, you're not marrying Relena? Oh... wow. I really wish
I'd known that..." Duo laughed weakly. "God, this is so not funny."
"Duo?"
Slowly, Duo raised his eyes to meet Heero's and offered a small smile,
"I'm really sorry. Things weren't suppose to work out this way."
"Duo, you're scaring me."
"Ironic way to go, huh?"
"...to go?" Heero echoed, staring at Duo with the horror of dawning
realization. "What did you do? Duo!" The American slid forward to his
knees and Heero quickly caught him, alarmed at how pale Duo was.
"Thanks for listening," Duo murmured, eyes half-closed. "Come again."
"Duo!" Heero cried, frantically looking around the apartment for an
idea of what on Earth was happening. "What did you do?!"
Feeling as if the ground had just been jerked out from under him,
Heero leapt to his feet and looked around for a telephone. A doctor.
There had to be a phone somewhere; Duo had called him, after all. His
search resulted in nothing, and all the while the pit of worry in
Heero's stomach grew. Finally, he checked the one place he hadn't yet
for the telephone; the bathroom.
Snapping the light on, Heero stared passively at the counter before
him, strewn with empty pill bottles. Oh, God, Duo...! Spotting the
phone, nestled there against the cabinet, Heero snatched it up and
started to dial emergency with shaking fingers.
For a moment, Heero simply stared at the phone in shock, unable to
realize why it was beeping at him. That rapid, annoying beep that
signaled another phone was off the hook somewhere in the house. Heero
snatched up one of the empty orange bottles and stared at the label,
his spinning mind trying to comprehend.
150 milligrams once a day. Zoloft.
God, Duo, is this what you meant by ironic? Duo...
Heero dropped the container and spun, racing back into the living
room and falling to his knees beside the limp form. For a moment he
feared the worst, but a pulse raced beneath his searching fingers.
Fluttering, weak, far too fast. He had to do something, anything.
Contact poison control. Phone dead.
How long, how long ago did Duo take the pills? How many? Enough to
cause unconsciousness... death... No, not Duo!
Slowly, Heero picked up Duo and stood, alarmed by how light-weight
the frail body felt in his arms. Cradling Duo carefully against his
chest, Heero could only think of one thing: get a doctor.
"Please, Duo, don't die... Don't die..."
-
-
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Author's Notes: This idea tackled me. Beat me unconscious. Left me for
dead and stole my clothes. I never saw it coming. Muah.
...What do you think? Feedback is always eagerly accepted ^_^
Poor, poor Duo. I'm still sick, did you know that? I don't think I'll
ever be well again! x_x This is all part my muses' sick plans, I just
know it! I'm on medication, but it's not really working that
effectively... ugh. Well, let me know what you think!
Feedback/reviews are very much appreciated!
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