Author Note – An AU of Threads, replacing Kerry with Jacob. I have taken some liberty with the dialogue from that episode to set the scene. Also references to season four's Divide and Conquer in coming chapters. As a side note, there was a discrepancy between the transcript and DVD subtitles for the spelling of "Lo'machen" so if anyone can clear this up for me, I already adore you and thank you in advance.
Please don't hate me, I must confess though, I preferred Kerry to Pete. If just for the simple fact that she saw Sam and Jack together once and got it. She held her hands up and bowed out instead of causing a rift. She knew Jack wouldn't choose her over Sam in the end and I liked the advice she gave him when she ended things, especially since Jack didn't deny anything she said. I can see why they introduced Kerry but Jacob was meddling in his own way and Sam was already having second thoughts. Jacob could have said what Kerry did in his own way. So that's what I'm going for here.
Anyway, I hope you enjoy. If you have the time, I would love to read any feedback you have.
Disclaimer – I don't own anything, just borrowing for entertainment purposes. No money is being made.
Strongest Ties
"Invisible threads are the strongest ties." ― Friedrich Nietzsche
Jack O'Neill stands on his deck at his smoking grill. He pulls head back, trying to eye the thick steaks through the thicker fog as he drenches them in beer. The coals hiss and send another wave of smoke up at him in retaliation and he's too focused on the meat to notice his second in command approach from the front of the house.
"Hi Sir," she calls to alert him to her presence.
He holds the large fork away from him over the grill, complete with dangling steak, as he looks up to find her stop at the bottom of the steps.
"Carter," Jack greets. He squints a little, not just because of the smoke but he's been waiting for her to show up. She's been too quiet and he's tried to justify it in his mind as what every bride-to-be goes through coupled with the fact Daniel was missing and their continuing fight with both the Replicators and Anubis. A year ago, he would've sought her out, got her to open up to him except the last time he tried that, she ended up with another man's ring on her finger. So, he's waited for her to come to him this time.
The timing sucks. One of the two worst people who could interrupt them is going to in a matter of moments.
"I'm sorry to bother you at home like this," she breathes out quickly.
Her nervousness comes off of her in reams and she isn't reading him as she does in the field, in the briefing room, anywhere but here. Or maybe she is and is choosing not to so she can get this off her chest. He wants to say something to save her from going too far before Jacob comes out and catches them. That would be far more embarrassing for her than admitting their feelings for one another in front of Teal'c and Janet years ago or being interrupted a year ago by Daniel. He's tried to forget that moment, tried to blame it on the fact that he was slowly losing his mind and pretended he didn't know what it could've been or meant. As much as he tried to deny it, in his gut he'd known what she was going to say.
He knew what would happen if he had given in to the urge to go to her then; he's seen her mourn him plenty of times and thought it might be easier if neither of them said what they both felt. Instead, he'd hunkered down in the house so he wouldn't leave her grieving him. He wouldn't leave her with that guilt with Shanahan in the picture.
"How'd you know I was here?" He asks bringing himself out of his own thoughts.
"I saw the smoke," Sam says with a nod at the grill.
"Oh yeah," he brushes the front of his shirt. In his head, he does a quick count of how long Jacob has been in the house and how long it should take him to find the things to set the table before he returns.
Caught up in her own anxiety of being here, she thinks his short answers are directed at her rather than considering any other explanation for his behaviour. "Look, is-is this okay? I mean, I could have called first, but-."
"No. Yeah. I mean, it's fine. So um," he glances at the back door over her shoulder. "What brings you to this neck of the woods on such a fine day? My back yard."
"Well, actually, I've been sitting in your driveway for the last ten minutes trying to work up the nerve to come and talk to you." She looks away, gesturing in the direction she just came from. There's the tiniest hesitation, the tiniest stall. "The truth is, I've been trying to work up the nerve for a lot longer than that."
"Oh." He can't give anything away. He knows. He hates that she doesn't.
"Pete put a down payment on a house."
Oh, crap.
"Well, that's great." He prides himself on how immediate his response is and the smooth delivery. He's become a pro at this for the last few months. He is happy for her. she deserves everything in this life even if he can't be the one who gives it to her. But a house, that's a huge step and one Jack thinks both of them should have a say in, and he can't help thinking for the hundredth time, why the guy keeps springing stuff like this on her. He doesn't get how it flusters her.
"It's a beautiful house." She pauses, almost pleading with him to pick up on her train of thought so she doesn't have to admit it. He wants to take this away from her…
"But?" His mind spares a thought to Jacob as he utters it. Tick, tock. Part of him hopes the older man will emerge now to spare them the truth.
"The-the truth is I'm having second thoughts about the wedding."
Luckily his mouth deals with that information better than his heart. "Why?"
Her blues beg him to see the toll this is taking on her yet she carries on regardless. "See, the things is, the closer it gets, the more I get the feeling that I'm making a big, huge mistake."
He looks down at the steak in his hand briefly, then even quicker squints at the door again, before back at his hand, looking anywhere but her. He can't let her do it. "Look, Carter, I don't know what…"
"I'm sorry to bother you with this, but, uh…there's a very good reason that I'm bothering you with this, and if I don't tell you now, I might never…"
"Jack, I looked everywhere. I couldn't find…Sam," her father greets her as he steps out of the back door carrying salad and a tub of coleslaw.
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"Dad?" Her head snaps up as soon as she hears his voice. Her breath catching, heart skipping a beat before restarting at an erratic pace. He doesn't look at all surprised to find her there if his bemused expression is anything to go by. "What are you doing here? I thought you were spending the day with Mark," Sam asks after composing herself with a steadying breath. There's nowhere to hide.
"I was," her father says trying to hide the tiniest wince from her. Where she and her father had reunited, he hadn't fared as well with mending his strained relationship with her brother. They were on speaking terms yet the sporadic visits meant they don't see each other enough to deal with their problems. She can't help but feel guilty about being able to spend more time with Jacob because of their work. "I was going to, but your sister in law had a work thing they couldn't get out of," he adds with a forced smile. "I'll get time with them at the wedding."
Like a ball of dead weight, her stomach drops. The wedding. She really wishes everyone would stop talking about it.
Her father edges out onto the deck and hands off the salad to Jack along with one of the beers.
"I didn't feel like spending the night stuck inside the mountain so Jack invited me around for a couple of beers, a game of chess and a steak he claims is the best one I've ever eaten," Jacob looks at the other man who waggles the steak in question at her. She huffs out a chuckle. "Considering it's doused in alcohol; I'd say he's halfway there."
She shares a knowing look with her CO who squints back through the smoke coming from the grill. She's grateful, Jack didn't have to spend time with her dad when her brother wouldn't. He could've called her except that's not who he is. Their stare goes on for a beat too long and it takes her dad clearing his throat to bring them back from the moment. Jack's cheek twitches and he spares a glance at Jacob. Her eyes following his to find the older man staring at them, eyes twinkling as if he knows something they don't. Maybe he does.
Jack clicks his tongue quietly, bringing her attention back to him. "What do you say, Carter? There's enough charred meat on the grill for the three of us."
She looks between them, the two men who know her better than anyone else. She knows them too. From the bemused expression on her fathers' face, she knows he is making a point, has been since he met Pete. Still, she can't refuse their invitation because her father has no qualms about confronting her in front of Jack if she tries to run away now. She doesn't want to think about how long he was inside, listening before he showed himself. The door was ajar and Jack's house isn't soundproof. Even if he hadn't heard anything, the look in his eyes tell her he knows why she's here. She can't even bring herself to consider what Jack is thinking.
She has no other option but to accept the invitation. "Okay."
Sam tentatively puts one foot on the bottom step and pushes up into the area. She meets Jack's eyes briefly. Is this okay?
He nods once.
Her insides churn like she's in the middle of a free fall and she has no parachute. He's still looking at her, head inclined slightly, silently asking her the same question. He's always held back from her as much as he can but he's been so guarded since she met Pete; protecting them both, like always. That's why she's here. If he can do this, so can she. She bobs her head and moves toward the table, already with two plates and cutlery alongside the salad and coleslaw.
Her dad moves closer to the table while Jack starts removing the steaks from the grill to a plate.
"Carter, could you grab another plate? Help yourself to beer in the fridge," Jack tells her moment later. "I think I have I might have some soda in there too."
It's diet and her favourite brand. He's not going to admit that out loud.
"Sure." She's going to need the alcohol to take the edge off anyway. She disappears into the house.
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Jacob settles behind him, leaving taking the corner of the table nearest the house, as Jack moves the steaks from the heat to rest on a plate. Jack places it in the middle of the table and sits opposite the other man folding his arms in front of him, leaving either end for Sam when she returns.
He knew there was something bothering the father and daughter pair during their last briefing. Jacob was pushing her buttons for a reason. He wasn't before he met Shanahan – something Jack had made himself scarce for – but obviously, he's formed the opinions which Sam had been worried about. Jacob has it in him to say his piece without pulling punches and while Jack appreciates why this isn't how this should happen. It's not fair on Sam. He knew exactly what he was doing the briefing room and Jack had snapped.
Go pick flowers.
It's been his first slip since Shanahan proposed. It had come out childish. It wasn't about Carter, she tried to focus on the briefing. Like always, she put duty before herself. Shanahan was putting her before everything else. Jack hates himself for agreeing with Shanahan in the same thought. She deserves to be a priority. He just wishes he had the same luxury the cop has.
He has always done his best to hold her at arms' length even when everything in him was drawn to her. He's slipped; he needed to hold her after Anubis's drone was tracking her and she needed to him to hold her after Janet died and she thought she could lose him too. One day, those slips aren't going to be enough. The growing need is chipping away at them and the closer it gets to the wedding he knows something is going to give. He can feel it.
He's seen the tension building in her and knows he could be the safest place for her to direct her frustration. Because he's her safest bet. He will always be there for her. Jacob knows that even if Sam doesn't.
"You're not subtle Jacob." Jack draws on his beer casually, feeling like he's been set up.
"I don't have time to be subtle Jack."
If the wedding wasn't fast approaching, Jack would question his answer. Instead, he checks the window and sees Carter still occupied with grabbing a beer and a plate. What is taking her so long? "You can't just drag me into the middle of this."
"I didn't know she was going to turn up tonight Jack," Jacob insists lowly so Sam can't hear. Jack believes him but he gets the sense Jacob expected her to go to him at some point. "But you know you're already in the middle of this."
"I don't know what you think is going on, but you're way off."
"You think so?" Jacob pins him with that knowing look of his. "Humour me, Jack, and let an old man make his point."
"This could backfire Jacob," Jack warns him. "It isn't about you."
"I'm well aware," Jacob's lips press into a thin line.
"She deserves to be happy and have a life."
"She's my daughter, Jack, I want her to have everything. She's not as happy as you seem to think, Pete makes her nervous."
"It's pre-wedding jitters," Jack insists though the words feel strange in his mouth. He knows what Jacob's approval means to Sam and "It'll pass."
"You're so blinkered by your need for her to be happy that you don't see what I do." Jacob sighs. "Or you refuse to."
Okay, the older man might have a point. He's tried to avoid her when he can since he found out about Shanahan, lest another humming encounter. Still, he can't just admit it, so…"I want a second opinion, what's Selmac's spin on all of this?"
"She agrees with me," Jacob answers casually while holding his gaze deliberately and Jack expects to see the flash of eyes to reiterate the point except it doesn't come. "Sam'll be pissed with me but I hope she at least listens to what I have to say and forgives me in time."
"Yeah," Jack draws out the word. "Let me know how that goes."
Jacob concedes his point with a nod and a roll of his eyes. "She's as stubborn as me," he sighs. "I was also hoping you would've pulled your head out of your ass and done something by now."
"Look, that's out of line. I'm not going to be the guy she works out her second thoughts with and then decides to marry the other guy anyway because I'm not going to be the asshole who asks her to choose between me, him and her career."
Jacob nods. "You're a good man Jack, she knows that." Jacob's eyes pass over him. "Probably better than you do."
"I'm still her CO, Jacob. You know exactly what will happen if I do anything," Jack pauses. Despite the fact that he'd do anything for her, he needs to protect his own sanity. "She'll end up hating me for it and that's not a risk I'm willing to take."
"You can't keep falling back on the regs as a reason to keep you apart, because Jack, you're making a mistake. So is Sam." Jacob waits for a long beat, considering his words carefully. "The regs are there to help you make the right decisions, keep your head at the worst possible times. You may not have acted on your feelings for one another, but can you honestly tell me you have that perspective when it comes to Sam?"
Jack has nothing to say to that because Jacob already knows the answer. Though the answer proves his point, Jack knows it doesn't satisfy Jacob either and he at least accepts it for its honesty. Both of them are saved from saying anything else because the woman in question chooses that moment to return.
Anyone interested in more? I have more.