Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter nor am I attempting to make any personal gain from this story.

Harry Slithers-in: Not the Order of the Phoenix: Chapter 1: What's going on?

Unlike the previous year Sirius had not come to visit Harry in person. Instead he had mirror phoned him on the 2nd of July to say he was busy and wouldn't be able to visit, but he would be keeping in touch via the phones. Tracey had also phoned him using her new mirror phone and had said she was busy but would be in touch as soon as possible.

Later that week Sirius had called again. "Hello, Harry. How have you been?"

"Ok, I guess," Harry replied. Can you tell me what's happening?"

"I can give you some information, but there are a lot of things I can't talk about at the moment. As you no doubt know Dumbledore is having some problems convincing Fudge about what happened during the last task. Even Walden McNair being admitted to St. Mungo's with severe burns a few hours after Voldemort's return has failed to convince him there is a serious situation."

"Walden McNair? Who's he?" Harry asked.

"He works for the Department for the Control and Regulation of Magical Creatures," Sirius explained. "It turns out he is also a Death-eater and he was injured during your escape from Voldemort last month. Despite that admission Fudge still won't accept the truth. Madam Umbridge got Fudge's ear first and he won't listen to anyone else; not even Madam Bones."

"Why is Fudge being so obstinate? Do you think he might be a Death-eater as well?"

Sirius snorted. "No. Fudge is a fool who has been bought off. He is more interested in money than in the truth."

"Can he be removed from office?"

"It's possible," Sirius said, "but it would need the support of nearly all the departmental heads. We already know some of them are Voldemort supporters, even if they aren't willing to admit it publicly."

"What about the Daily Prophet?" Harry asked. "Haven't they become interested in it?"

Sirius looked surprised. "Haven't you been reading the Daily Prophet lately?"

"Yes. I've been looking out for any stories that might provide a hint about Voldemort's intentions."

Sirius looked distinctly uncomfortable. "Next time you read the paper look towards the end of several stories. I think you may find the answer to your question.

"Look, I better go. Things are very busy at the moment. Talk to you later." The mirror went blank before Harry could ask any more questions.

Harry decided he would read some of the articles in the Daily Prophet more fully. It took him only a short time to understand what Sirius had meant. One article about a wizard who had been injured in a potions accident was all it took. The last paragraph of the article read:

'We can only hope he doesn't end up with a scar. It's bad enough we already have one scarred person of doubtful integrity.'

Even if that one its own hadn't been obvious enough there was another story which concluded:

'So, as if we didn't already have enough delusional people saying the dead are coming back to life, now we have someone who actually believes he is Merlin's reincarnation.'

Although neither of these stories mentioned Harry directly it was obvious enough where they were aimed. And the more stories he read the more obvious it became. Harry decided to cancel his subscription to the Daily Prophet.

It wasn't until the 21st of July that Harry got a visitor. Shortly before noon, while was preparing lunch for the Dursleys, Tracey knocked on the door. He invited her inside but she declined, saying she was dropping off something on Sirius' behalf.

"Sirius asked me to give you this," she said, handing him a box of chocolates. "I know we have been evasive and we are not answering your questions but there is a reason. I cannot tell you anymore but, please, just be patient. I will be back on your birthday and I will tell you whatever I can then. Until then, you won't be able to contact me. My mother and I are going overseas to the Continent. Robert was invited but he decided to stay at his new job. I won't have my mirror phone with me since it may not be legal over there yet."

Harry tried to hide his disappointment. "Ok, I guess. I wish somebody would tell me something positive, though. I don't like being left out like this."

"I know. I wish I could tell you more but, at the moment, I can't. I'm sorry," she finished.

After a hug which Harry returned unenthusiastically Tracey headed back to her mother's car which was parked by the corner. Harry watched her get and the car leave before he was brought abruptly back to reality.

"Boy," Vernon bellowed, "is lunch ready yet?"

"Yes. I was just about to serve it up," Harry replied as returned to the kitchen.

The weather had been getting steadily hotter as summer had progressed, and there had been essentially no rain since June meaning the grass was drying out. Water restrictions were now in place but Harry still had to weed and tidy the garden. All in all, this was turning into one of the worst summers Harry could remember.

Adding to his problems Dudley had now found a new sport; boxing. Vernon and Petunia though it was wonderful. They were the parents of heavyweight age grade boxing champion of South-East England. They had naturally doted on Dudley while giving Harry nothing. Worse, Dudley often boasted how he was looking for something (someone) to practice on. Harry had been lucky so far, unlike some of the local teenagers whom Dudley had decided he didn't like any more.

Finally, Harry's birthday arrived. The usual small supply of presents from his Hogwarts friends all arrived by owl before breakfast but there was nothing from Tracey. She hadn't specified exactly when she would arrive so Harry had to wait and hope. Sirius, Remus and a couple of others mirror called him but it was only a temporary distraction for him while he waited.

Just before 5pm Harry heard a car pull up. Moments later Tracey knocked on the door and she and her mother entered the house. Tracey was wearing a backpack that was clearly full.

"Happy birthday, Harry," Mrs. Davis said before excusing herself to talk to the Dursley's. Tracey, meanwhile, hugged Harry and asked to come up to his room so they could talk in private.

In Harry's room Tracey closed the door and the window before removing her backpack and placing it on the bed.

"Happy birthday," she began, "sorry I couldn't tell you more before we went overseas but we had to be very careful. Dumbledore has had someone watching your house ever since you got back from school a month ago so we had to set things up so as to appear innocent. Also, it took a month to prepare the potion that we need in order to get you out of here unnoticed." Opening her backpack she pulled out a sealed vial containing a thick, dark brown liquid.

"That looks like Polyjuice potion," Harry said, looking closely at it.

"It is," she replied. She pulled out two small glass vials and tipped half the potion into each.

Harry looked confused. "Tracey? Are you planning what I think you're planning?"

In response she pulled out a couple of her hairs and placed them in one of the vials. "Put some of your hair in the other one which I will drink. You will drink this one." She gave him the first vial.

"Are you sure about this?" he asked.

"No. But since Robert isn't here we will have to compromise. You are going to leave with my mother, pretending to be me. I, meanwhile, will stay here pretending to be you until the portkey in my pack activates. I will place the pack in your trunk and hold onto it so your trunk and I will be portkeyed away at the same time, all clear?"

Harry thought about it. He didn't like it but Tracey seemed determined to do it anyway. "For this to work," he began cautiously, "we will have to change clothes as well, right?"

"Yes. That means you get to see me in my underwear, and I will see you in yours. Quickly now, the portkey is set for 5-45. That's only half an hour off and you will need to be long gone before then."

Harry pulled a couple of hairs out and placed them in the second vial which he gave to Tracey. Although neither of them had mentioned it he could see another, bigger problem with the plan. Using Polyjuice potion they would take on all the physical characteristics of the person they were impersonating, including their gender. Harry began feeling a little uncomfortable and tried not to think about it.

The potion with Harry's hair had turned a pale gold almost like honey. The other potion was only a fraction darker. He wondered if the colours meant anything but now was not the time to think about it. Tracey, meanwhile, had started taking off her clothes and Harry decided to do the same.

As soon as both were in their underwear they took up their respective vials and drank quickly, trying not to gag on the foul tasting liquid while also trying not to look at each-other.

After they had stopped convulsing from the changeover they quickly donned each-others clothes. Harry was tempted to look at his new "chest" but didn't think it was appropriate, especially with its rightful owner right there with him.

When they were ready Tracey looked at the clock. "5-21. The Polyjuice potion will wear off in an hour. Is everything you going to need in your trunk?"

"Nearly. Just a few things to pack," Harry replied.

When they had finished Tracey said, "You are to leave immediately. Go down to the lounge; my mother is expecting you. She will tell you what you need to know - just do whatever she says. I will leave when the portkey activates in about 20 minutes. All clear?" Harry nodded. "Right, see you soon." She kissed him before sitting on the trunk holding the portkey.

Harry went downstairs and into the lounge. "All set?" Mrs. Davis asked. Harry nodded.

"Since it is Harry's birthday," Mrs. Davis began addressing the Dursleys, "I hope you will allow him at least a few hours of free time. I will be back in touch tomorrow and find out how you treated him. For now I and my daughter must be going as we've still got a few hours driving until we are back home. It has been a pleasure talking to you."

"Well, goodbye," Vernon replied as Mrs. Davis left the room with Harry right behind her. He was carrying the backpack Tracey had carried when they arrived but it only contained his glasses and a few other items. Although it was clearly less full than when she had arrived they both assumed the Dursleys would simply decide the difference in volume would be accounted for by a birthday present.

They climbed into the rental car Mrs. Davis had hired and drove off. After about five minutes they pulled off into a rest area where they left the car, after taking out all the Davis' belongings.

"I am going to apparate you to my house which now has a Fidelius charm on it. I am the secret keeper and I will tell you more when we arrive," Mrs. Davis said.

"What about the car?" Harry asked.

"Someone will be here to pick it in a minute. Ready?"

She offered her arm Harry who took it. A moment later he felt as if he was being squeezed through a narrow tube. The sensation lasted a few seconds and, when it was over, he found himself standing in a gazebo in the back yard of a very modest looking house. Mrs. Davis led him straight to the door and into a comfortable looking lounge which was filled with muggle items including a tv. From there she took him into a hallway.

"Your room is at the end of the hall. It used to be Robert's room and you are welcome to it any time you want to visit. For your information the address is 1218 Wood Lane, Chipping Dale, Suffolk. We'll talk more once everybody is back to normal." She headed back toward the lounge leaving Harry to enter his room alone.