"Previously on Total Drama: United States..." Chris began, standing in front of a beige-hued Visitor Center.

Clips from last episode began to file across the screen, accompanied by Chris' voiceover. "Our teams hiked the Appalachian Trail, in hopes of obtaining a victory!"

A clip of both Mitch and Miriam appeared on the screen, side by side. "Some rose to the occasion!" Chris' voice exclaimed with flourish. Then, a clip of Luciana, Kyle, and Daryl appeared. "Some...well, had a bit of a different experience."

"In the end, it was the Yee-Haws who were on the chopping block, and it was Daryl who was sent home."

The camera returned to Chris in front of the Visitor Center, who had changed into an Army dress uniform. "What challenge awaits us this week? Who will go home? Who will fall in love?" Chris waggled his brows, flashing the camera a cocky grin.

"Find out, on the most dramatic episode yet! Of..."

The camera panned out, revealing a fence the read: 'Fort Bragg.'

"Total! Drama! United States!"

(INSTRUMENTAL OF THEME SONG)

The instrumental began with a plane landing in the United States, and Chris emerging from the plane with a huge grin on his face and waving an American flag.

(DEAR MOM AND DAD I'M DOING FINE, YOU GUYS ARE ON MY MIND)

The camera followed Chris through John F. Kennedy International Airport at 2x speed, until he eventually ended up outside signing autographs to rabid fans, leaving Chef to carry their bags, all while holding pamphlets about what to do in New York City. As Chef put down one of the suitcases, one of the pamphlets flew away in the breeze.

(YOU ASK ME WHAT I WANTED TO BE, NOW I THINK THE ANSWER IS PLAIN TO SEE)

The pamphlet drifted into a body of water in Central Park, only to be caught on a hook and reeled it. The other side of the hook was revealed to be Cohen, who huffed at his catch. The camera panned over to Bubba, who reeled in a rather large fish with a beam on his face.

(I WANNA BE FAMOUS)

The camera moved across Central Park to Reggie and Mira, who were throwing a football back and forth to each other. Reggie signaled for Mira to go long, launching the ball from his grip. Mira jumped for it, ultimately missing and watching it hit a cop as he rode by on a bike, sending him to the ground. He got up, immediately heading toward the two, prompting them to run away in terror. They ran across the entrance of the Metropolitan Art Museum, and when they moved inside, the camera followed.

(I WANNA LIVE CLOSE TO THE SUN)

Meredith and Tonia pondered over a Van Gogh self-portrait, Meredith appearing to be rambling about the history of the piece to Tonia, who flipped out her camera to begin to vlog. When they saw Reggie and Mira move by, they paused in confusion, especially when the cop followed. However, the cop stopped when he saw Tonia, removing a notepad to get her autograph.

Meredith huffed, stepping outside of the Met, just for her Met brochure to fly away, which the camera followed.

(SO PACK YOUR BAGS BECAUSE I'VE ALREADY WON)

The Met brochure flew towards Chinatown, stopping when it hit a window to a tea shop. Mitch, Daryl, and Ash were inside, idly looking over tea leaves. When Daryl whipped out a bowl to try and pack the tea leaves in it like they were bud, Mitch face-palmed, Ash staring in awe as Mitch took the bowl and threw it in the trash, just as it was being taken out, and loaded into a garbage truck.

(EVERYTHING TO PROVE NOTHING IN MY WAY, I'LL GET THERE ONE DAY)

The garbage truck eventually passed through Times Square, with Pracilla and Maisie ambling from shop to shop with bags in her hand, the camera then moving to Brianna and Hayato as they got a picture together with someone pretending to be Spiderman. Once Pracilla, Brianna, Hayato, and Maisie all got back together, they gaped at Sophie trying to put the same Spiderman into a headlock, rushing over to her, hoping to pull her off. The camera then followed a taxi as it drove by.

('CAUSE I WANNA BE FAMOUS)

The camera followed the taxi to New York Public Library, where Tom and AJ got out, already whipping out their notebooks in excitement. As AJ opened her notebook to begin to speak to Tom, Kaisa appeared out of nowhere, removing something from AJ's pocket and getting into the taxi they had arrived in.

(NA NA NA...)

The taxi moved to Broadway, and Kaisa got out, entering the Gershwin Theatre on Broadway as Alex was playing the piano, and Drew was singing lovingly to an adoring audience, to which Kaisa rolled her eyes.

(I WANNA BE, I WANNA BE, I WANNA BE FAMOUS!)

The camera moved down the block to the Neil Simon Theatre, where Bea and Miriam were on-stage, laughing as they did the macarena and turned themselves to the side.

(I WANNA BE, I WANNA BE, I WANNA BE FAMOUS!)

The camera moved Corsica exiting the stage door of the Neil Simon Theatre, appearing to have just gotten off stage prior to when Bea and Miriam started dancing. With a longing expression on his face, he peered upward to the top of the Empire State Building.

(WHISTLES)

The camera moved to the top of the Empire State Building, where Luciana and Kyle sat on lawn-chairs, clinking two bottles of Coke together. Suddenly, Luciana pointed to the sky, hitting Kyle on the arm to get his attention.

In the sky, a plane came by, a banner saying "Total Drama: United States" flying behind it.

(EPISODE START)

The episode began in the Yee-Haws' RV, more specifically, focused on the faces of Tonia, Bubba, Meredith, and Alex. "D-Do you think they know we're watching them?" Meredith whispered to the trio in front of her, only to be promptly shushed by Tonia, who held up a manicured finger.

"No," Tonia replied, holding her fingers up to mimic a square, as if she were filming whatever was in front of her. "But if I could vlog this moment, these two would become the next 'it' couple on Youtube."

The camera revealed Brianna and Hayato, Hayato having lifted Brianna by the waist to reach something in one of the taller kitchen cabinets. Once he had put her down, Brianna turned to Hayato, offering him a shy grin, her cheeks pink.

"It's like they're stuck in their own world. It's kinda gross." Alex confessed, narrowing his eyes and starting to idly begin to play with his sleeve. He jolted when Bubba elbowed him to the shoulders, sending him awkwardly tumbling into Sophie.

"Tonia's right! Their romance is like a donut with strawberry frosting and sprinkles- classic and sweet!" Bubba kissed his fingers for emphasis, prompting Tonia to giggle and clap her hands in agreement.

(CONFESSIONAL CAM)

Alex huffed, crossing his arms over his chest. "Call me old-fashioned, call me a 'Boomer', but I don't really care for Brianna and Hayato's budding romance." He leaned forward, looking exasperatedly into the camera. "Last night, I went into the kitchen to grab a snack, and they were on the couch talking about their childhood. I felt like I was intruding, and I live in this RV, too!"

(END OF CONFESSIONAL CAM)

Mira and Sophie ambled into the living room area, Mira's teeth chattering as her hair created a wet spot on her t-shirt. Meredith turned to the pair, moving over so she could join them. "Hey Mira, are you okay? You don't look to happy." She pointed out, keenly observing the tight expression on Mira's face.

Sophie chortled, rolling her eyes. "She looks like that almost every day." She jested, making Mira almost growl. Sophie raised her hands in surrender, moving to join Alex and Tonia.

"Brianna took up all the hot water this morning in the shower. She was talking last night about how she and Hayato were going to," Mira batted her eyelashes, raising her voice an octave to imitate Brianna's voice. "Watch the sunrise!" She gagged, shaking her head.

Meredith tipped her head, wetting her lips as she tried to tip-toe around Mira's temper. "Well, Brianna and Hayato are clearly into each other. This is simply build-up to the confession, the moment that comes out, there will not be nearly as much pressure to be consistently on top of her own game."

Mira bit the inside of her cheek, implicitly seething over how Meredith had nailed the hammer on the head. "Well she better tell him soon, my showers are at stake."

(YANKEES RV)

Inside the Yankees RV, things were seemingly moving at a factory-pace. Ash and Cohen stood beside the fridge while drinking coffee, discussing high school experiences. Cohen poured a cup of black coffee, handing it off to Reggie, who sat on the counter with Miriam and Maisie as they discussed where the RV was taking them.

Reggie peered over to Kaisa as she walked in, waving her over with the cup of coffee for her. She smirked, and as she walked by the living room, she nodded to Bea, whose legs were thrown over Drew's lap, as she was sandwiched between Drew and Corsica, as they avidly described life in New York City.

On the perimeter, leaning against a wall was Tom, who took in the scenery around him through skeptical lenses. He used his free arm to prop his notebook on, as he frantically scribbled. He thought it was odd how little time it took for people to shuffle off into their groups. Were people really this prone to wanting to be a part of groups so bad?

"I-It's weird, right?" A female voice broke his monotony, and upon further inspection, he saw that AJ had silently started to stand beside him, holding a cup of black tea. "It almost reminds me of high school...Like who am I going to sit with for lunch? Or will I just eat by myself in the same room I write the school paper?" AJ sputtered, glancing around rapidly. "Not saying I do that, but-."

Tom cut her off by raising his hand, nodding in agreement while hiding the contents of his notebook. "It is peculiar, how little time it took for people to find their group. Is that a psychological aspect of humans, our desire to try to associate ourselves with people?"

AJ pondered what Tom was saying in silence, before cracking a small smile. "I try not to put a lot of things into boxes. Sometimes it's not a psychological thing, or a backstory thing, sometimes it's just a people thing. They're the things that make us human."

This comment surprised Tom, who regarded her with wide eyes. "Yeah..." He then trailed off, enjoying the comfortable silence he was sharing with AJ, amongst the laughter and voices around him.

(OUTSIDE OF RVs)

The teams began to pile out of their RVs, squinting against the harsh mid-morning sun. The area itself seemed rather mundane; a simple, two lane road cut through sparse trees and vegetation, before diverging deeper into the forest. This divergence was marked simply by a sign: "Fort Bragg: Home of The Airborne and Special Operations Forces."

Mitch jumped as the RVs began to drive away, vanishing down the road. "Wait, Fort Bragg...Military..." As he began to associate words, he glanced around him desperately. "Has anyone seen Chef?!"

"Why are you freaking out so much? Are your spidey senses tingling?" Kyle quipped.

Mitch gulped, shaking his head. "No, worse. My horror senses are." He looked to his team, his face paling with fear. "Think about it. Military themed challenge, in Fort Bragg. Chef and Chris are gone. This means..."

Mitch was cut off by a high-pitched whistle, followed by the brass of a trumpet reverie. Soon, out of the sparse vegetation, Chris and Chef emerged, Chris pretending to play a trumpet while holding a Bluetooth speaker in his shirt pocket, and Chef adorned in a flat-brimmed hat, sunglasses, a green muscle tank, camo pants, and Army boots.

(CONFESSIONAL CAM)

"Master Chief is back?!" Ash shivered, curling his knees to his chest. "When I used to watch this show, I feared three people; Heather, Courtney, and Master Chief. I signed up for Total Drama, not Fear Factor!"

(CONFESSIONAL CAM)

"I've been to boot camp." Luciana deadpanned, reclining back as she picked idly at her cuticles. "Yeah, my school thought it would be some like, attitude reform or something, so my guidance counselor suggested it to my dad. All it taught me is that I can't take dudes seriously who yell in my face, and that I am mad good at sneaking Postmates into boot camps."

(CONFESSIONAL CAM)

Hayato straightened his posture, looking at himself in the mirror. "Brianna, I am very happy we have reunited I also have been in love with you since we were kids. Anyways, how's the weather?" He face-planted, immediately relaxing his posture. "No, stupid. No one would take that seriously. How am I expected to have Brianna take me seriously? Not even our own team takes us seriously."

Removing a small notepad from his pocket, he set it upon the counter, starting to scribble words into it, his voice too quiet for the microphone to pick up.

As he was about to practice once more, the door opened, and Tom peeked through. "Oh, my apologies. I was just going to..." He pointed inside, hoping to get his confessional time.

Hayato sighed, starting to head out the door, leaving behind his notebook.

Tom entered, closing the door behind him. Upon sitting down, he noticed the notebook, which he picked up, and began to flip through.

(END OF CONFESSIONAL CAMS)

"Alright, you IPhone using, Tik Tok dancing, emotion masquerading, useless maggots, line up!" Chef yelled into a megaphone, the group of teenagers scrambling amongst their team to get into a straight line. Circling behind, Chef strolled idly by them, his arms tucked formally behind his back.

"This challenge will be structured by yours truly, so I am expecting the best!" He slapped Cohen atop the head at his slouched posture. "And that means, no lollygagging!" Chef then moved over and slapped Drew on the back of the head. "No talking back." Then, to Ash, who he began to slap repeatedly. "And especially no practicing your horrible stand-up comedy bits!"

Chris maniacally laughed, smiling in content. "Master Chief will be taking over today, so I hope you don't miss my beautiful face too much."

Corsica frowned, narrowing his eyes. "I hate the fact that I will."

Master Chief leered at the contestants' misfortune, cracking his knuckles. "Shall we begin?"

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

When the show returned, the two teams were divided up in front of two separate trails that divided off into the woods. "Alright! You'll be running with your team the length of a 5K. When I was in war, I had to run the length of a marathon to escape the enemy. I fought tigers, hunger, and most of all, myself. But here I am."

The contestants' gaped at him with an amalgamation of amazement, annoyance, and confusion, as Chef produced two pieces of paper, giving one to Luciana, and one to Kaisa. "These are your maps of your trails, the first team to return gets an advantage in the obstacle course. Get on your mark!"

Luciana observed the map quixotically, her nose scrunching up. "Man, this trail is super hilly. Is yours like this?" She asked Kaisa, holding up the two maps to compare them. The Yee-Haw's paper was blank and white, with no light blue guidelines, while the Yankees' was yellow, as it ripped from a production assistant's clipboard and drawn haphazardly last minute.

Kaisa cast a quick glance to the opposing teams' map, shaking her head while pouting her lower lip. "Nah, ours is pretty straightforward, so let the best team win, right?" She held her fist out to Luciana, and the two collided knuckles in a fist-bump.

Once all the teams were lined up, Chef raised the whistle to his lips. "Ready, set, GO!" He then blew the whistle, and the teams soon took off.

At his newfound loneliness, Chef grinned pleasantly, removing his phone from his pocket. "Time to catch up on Chopped."

(YANKEES)

Despite the varying physical statures on the Yankees, they remained at a very consistent pace, set expertly by Reggie, who led the pack. "Alright team, we just have to be confident, and we'll get this done!" He encouraged.

"Running is one of my least favorite things to do." Cohen complained near the back, his arms swinging loosely by his side.

"Everything is your least favorite thing to do, Cohen." Miriam pointed out, to which Cohen nodding, murmuring the words "Fair point" beneath his breath.

The camera panned over to Bea and Drew, who jogged alongside Corsica. "I don't understand running. It just reminds me of how bad I am with cardio." Bea teased, earning a bright grin from Drew.

"Well, not all of us have to be good at everything, it means our strengths fall in other areas!" Corsica contended with a sickly-sweet tone, speeding up his pace so he was at the head of them.

Drew waited until he was out of earshot, and then looked down at Bea. "Don't listen to him. You're the type of person I would let humble brag around me because you would just smile, and I would feel like you deserve all good fortunes." He ruffled her hair, soon speeding up to catch up with Corsica, prompting Bea to then catch up.

The camera then panned ahead once more, specifically to Kaisa and Maisie. "That's weird, right?" Kaisa spoke out of nowhere, narrowing her eyes in suspicion. "That we got such a flat trail, and the Yee-Haws got the super challenging one? Even the two papers were different."

"Girl, just take the fortunes that we got. Maybe it's a punishment for losing the last challenge. Don't think so deeply." Maisie countered, canvassing their surroundings. The trail, at least from her point of view, seemed flat with a few twists and turns signature of a trail that ended where it began.

Kaisa silenced herself, figuring that maybe she was over-analyzing the situation.

But she remained skeptical.

(YEE-HAWS)

"Running...How dare you betray me!" Bubba collapsed to the ground, curling into a ball. "Go without me, brave soldiers, for I am a weakness!" He yelled with melodrama, going so far as closing his eyes.

"Bubba, dude," Alex pointed at the rest of the hill they were climbing. "You just took your first step onto this hill." He rasped, glancing behind Bubba and realizing they had traversed several hills prior.

"So, Brianna," Tonia climbed the hill ahead beside the girl, a hand reaching out to touch the adjacent shoulder. "Spill the tea. Tell me what is going on between you and Hayato."

Brianna's eyes widened, her face turning red at the insinuation of something going on. "W-What? You've noticed?"

Tonia chortled, flipping her hair. "Girl, if I could, I would start a ship name for you two. Hayanna? Briyato?" She paused, letting Luciana pass them. "So, spill!"

"O-Okay! Okay." Brianna smiled in false exasperation. "There's always been something unrequited there. Now that we are seeing each other again, after years of being apart, it's all coming back, and more feelings are coming...I think I really like him." She confessed, her voice dropping to a whisper.

"EEEK!" Tonia squealed, clapping her hands together. "That's so cute! He must tell you! He should like, write a song, or make a super good PowerPoint presentation!"

Brianna's eyes widened in horror at the idea. "G-Goodness no, I do not like surprises or huge gestures. They make me feel nervous."

The camera then panned over to Sophie, who yelled in excitement. "Guys, we're close to the end! I can see it!"

(END)

The Yee-Haws ran up, each of them out of breath and in various stages of dehydration, while the Yankees appeared relaxed, having been there for several minutes. Chef stood before them, holding his megaphone.

"What was that, Yee-Haws? You're nearly 10 minutes behind the Yankees! I gave you a similar trail!" Chef barked, approaching the group with long strides. This statement was met by Mira's bewildered stare. "What? You sent us over every hill possible!"

Chef scowled, falling silent as he soon ambled away. "Anyway, the Yankees win the advantage. Meet me at 1230 hours east bound at the obstacle course! Get some water, you pond scum. With that, he marched off.

The silence hung in the air, until Cohen broke it by asking: "Does anyone know military time? Or have directional abilities?"

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

"This obstacle course will test every part of your body in a physical way. Not only that, but you'll need mental endurance to get through it. Every team member will traverse this course, the last one to stand wins for their team. Get ready!" Chef demanded, standing in front of a labyrinth looking obstacle course, lined with pull-up bars, and even a climbing rope.

The two teams stood in proximity of each other, Tom's head tilting as he listened to Tonia speak to Brianna.

"So, you never had like, a surprise party or anything like that?" Tonia asked, seemingly continuing their conversation from the trail.

"N-No! I always told my friends against that. They make me way too nervous." Brianna justified, moving to stand over by Hayato, who smiled at her arrival.

(CONFESSIONAL CAM)

Mitch rolled his eyes, covered from head to toe with mud. "I love these physicality-based challenges. They really bring out the best in me."

(CONFESSIONAL CAM)

Kaisa slammed her hands down on the table, a wicked grin on her face. "I love these physicality-based challenges! They really bring out the best in me."

(END OF CONFESSIONAL CAM)

Cohen fell facedown into the mud, sprawling his arms out as other people moved past him, the camera moving back to reveal a large climbing wall, where the contestants were forced to swing their legs over and drop down to get to the next part of the course.

"Come on, Bubba! You just have to lift your weight up and get to the top, then it's an easy drop!" Meredith encouraged from the top, waving her hand down to her teammate.

Bubba huffed, clearly exasperated as he grasped the first rung, trying to hoist himself to the next rung. "There's no way. God made me thick with Two C's for a reason, and this isn't it."

Chef's whistle blew, signaling that both Cohen and Bubba were out of the game, leaving both teams down one player.

The next stage was the rope swing, with a deeper pit of mud below it. The contestants were forced to climb a shaky ladder to the top platform, grab the rope, and swing to the next platform without falling into the mud.

"CRAP!" Mitch's voice exclaimed, his body dropping from the rope and splashing into the watery mud below.

The camera panned over, showing Miriam and Reggie on the other side, as well as Ash. Reggie extended a long arm, grabbing the swinging rope. "Sorry about that fall, dude!" Reggie called down to Mitch, just as he got out of the mud pit.

"It's about equilibrium, we just have to make sure our weight is evenly distributed and swing ourselves to the other side." Miriam logically explained, taking the rope from Reggie. Wrapping her hands sturdily just above her head, she nodded her head to her two teammates. "See you on the other side, soldiers!"

With that, she launched herself off the platform, releasing the rope to glide onto the other platform, still holding onto it. "Alright! Here you guys go!" She let go of the rope, prompting Ash to catch it.

Ash caught the rope with his hands, saluting Reggie as he then jumped off, letting out a loud scream as his body swung to the other side. "Wait! No, no, no!" He removed his hands just as the rope began to swing back toward the start, making him fall into the mud pit.

Reggie cringed, shrugging his shoulders. "Well, I heard mud baths could be relaxing."

Chef's whistle blew again, signaling Mitch and Ash both out of the game. The sound sputtered when he looked past the rope swing to the log hurdles.

Bea and Drew surrounded Corsica, who gripped his ankle in pain. "Damn it! I thought I had this." He gestured wildly to Bea, his eyes narrowing. "You're like two feet tall, how did you get over the hurdles?!"

Bea's eyes widened, her arms and legs covered in mud. "Drew helped me over! We offered you help, but you refused it."

Drew chuckled, folding his arms over his chest as Luciana and Kyle passed them. "Yeah, you were going all Corsica Mode, where you get into one of your characters and have some of weird, convoluted physical reaction."

Chef's whistle blew, signaling a seething Corsica out of the game.

The camera panned back to the rope swing as a screaming AJ tried swinging her way across, only to end up stuck in the middle. "Oh, fiddlesticks..."

Whistle blow for AJ.

The camera panned hastily back to the hurdles as Meredith ran forward with confidence, unable to trapeze past the tallest hurdle, her chest slamming into the top as her body flew back into the mud.

Whistle blow for Meredith.

Moving forward again, the camera showed contestants crawling beneath swinging axes through the mud, Tonia frozen in the middle as she gripped her hair. "There's no way I'm getting a haircut today!"

Beside her, Tom began to slide past her on his elbows, only to have his arms begin to sink in the mud. With a grunt, he tried to pull his body out, only to sink further into the mud. "May I please have some assistance before I die from this?"

Whistle blows for Tom and Tonia.

The camera panned back to the rope swing, only to show Brianna tangled upside down on it, tied up in it by her leg. Her hair fanned out below her, as she gagged, seemingly about to get sick from hanging upside down for so long.

Whistle blow for Brianna.

The camera moved forward, to what looked like a child's spinning amusement park ride, the ones that requires the rider to stand. "Wait, what kind of wack-ass obstacle course has a kiddie ride?" Kaisa grumbled, just as Chef walked up.

He blew his whistle, pointing to Kaisa. "Are you questioning my methods?! You are out!" He cried, making Kaisa huff and amble off.

Bea stood back, holding her stomach defensively. "D..Do you think we could be sick on this thing?" She shakily asked Drew, which was caught by Sophie as she walked past, about to enter the ride.

"What's wrong with a little," Sophie pretended to gag, going so far as even rolling her eyes. "A little," She did so again. "Puke!" She cackled, making Bea's face pale.

"I can't do this. I have a fear of..." Bea lurched, her hand gripping her mouth.

Drew watched her run off, knowing that his team was down for the count. "This is the worst day of my life." He muttered as he joined Sophie, Maisie, Miriam, and Reggie on the ride. The remainder of the Yee-Haws: Kyle, Alex, Hayoto, Luciana, and Mira were already on board.

"I hope y'all like getting dizzy! This is gonna be wild. Think y'all can handle it?" Mira taunted as she held onto the sidebars beside her.

Drew scoffed, rolling his eyes at her. "If I can listen to you speak without feeling sick, I can handle this."

That insult alone made Alex laugh out loud, only to be silenced by Mira's sharp glare.

(CONFESSIONAL CAM)

Alex sat quietly, before emitting a restricted chortle, which then metastasized into full-blown laughter. "Did you hear that?! God, Mira is going to need some ice for that burn!" He stopped his laughter, still emitting short chuckles as he wiped his eyes. "I get that she's my teammate, but God can she be annoying."

(END OF CONFESSIONAL CAM)

A loud buzzer sound rang from the ride, signaling that it was about to start spinning. Luciana reached out to Kyle, giving him a fist-bump. "Whoever hurls first owes the other one a Twinkie." She bet, making Kyle's lips curled upward as he reciprocated the action. "You're on, dork."

Maisie swallowed anxiously, her palms sliding against the sidebars as they began to feel clammy. "How can they be so nonchalant about this?"

Reggie regarded the other team on the opposite site of the ride, just as it began to teeter to the right. "They like this, that's how."

As if that was the cue, the ride began to rapidly spin, Miriam's eyes sliding tightly shut as her hair whipped around her. "I shouldn't have eaten lunch!"

The ride continued to spin, often pausing for brief moments of levity, before teetering to the right and beginning in the opposite direction and tilting in different directions so the blood in the body could be dispersed awkwardly to the head.

(CONFESSIONAL CAM)

Miriam rocked back and forth, her eyes wide and unblinking. "Still...spinning..." She rasped, curling her knees to her chest.

(END OF CONFESSIONAL CAM)

Chef stood outside of the ride with Chris and the eliminated contestants, who watched in horror as the screams and maniacal laughs echoed from inside the metal death chamber that was the spinning ride.

"Now I'm grateful that I just fell into a mud pit." Mitch mused, ruffling the back of his head uncomfortably.

The ride soon came to an eventual stop with a resounding creek, the doors sliding open. The first person to bound out was Mira, who bounced excitedly over the prospect of something happening next.

Reggie assisted Miriam out, the pair stumbling down the three steps that elevated the infrastructure from the grass. "Yeah, we're done. I think Miriam is going need her stomach pumped or something. As for me, I need a doggie bag." Reggie alerted Chef, helping the female down to the even ground.

Maisie was next, her face pale, and her forehead bearing a glow from sweat. "I don't care if there is any more to this, I am done." She finalized.

A gleeful cheer emitted from the entrance as Hayato, Sophie, Alex, Luciana, and Kyle came out, stumbling from side to side, but appearing pleased from the ride due to the lax grins on their faces.

"That was fun, when are we doing it again?" Hayato clapped his hands together eagerly, rubbing them together, much to Miriam's horror. "You monster..." She whispered, shaking her head in disbelief.

AJ grasped Bea's arm eagerly, waiting for Drew to emerge from the ride. "If Drew goes on, we can continue. If he doesn't, we lose this part of the challenge!"

Bea regarded AJ, staring in anticipation at the small entrance to the ride as the crowd around her grew silent.

Slowly, Drew emerged from the ride, gripping the sides of the door for support as he ducked his tall frame out of the metal box. He surveyed his team through blurry eyes, then the other team, until finally he raised his first.

The Yankees roared in joy, clapping their hands for their one surviving member. "Heck yeah, Drew! You're the man!" Reggie encouraged, still holding onto Miriam.

"T-Thank you...You all.." Drew tottered to right, walking down the stairs. "I'm just so...Happy.." He trailed off, his eyes rolling to the back of his head as he fell to the left, collapsing into the grass.

Chef cringed, blowing his whistle to signal the end of this part of the challenge. "With that, the Yee-Haws win the second part of the challenge! They will get an advantage in the final part of the challenge, which will occur at 0500 hours in the mess hall. Now get showered, maggots!"

Observing the state of some of the contestants, Chef rolled his eyes. "And get some of these kids to the infirmary"

(THE INFIRMARY)

A guttural groan sounded from Drew as he arose from his cot, rubbing his head. "What happened?" She grumbled, gripping the bridge of his nose between his eyebrows and squeezing his eyes shut.

"You're in the infirmary. You passed out at the end of the challenge." Corsica informed Drew between icing his ankle. "I was just about to head out to take a shower, you were out for around an hour."

Drew nodded his head wordlessly, rising to his feet and ambling out ahead of Corsica, squinting in the afternoon sunlight. Being out for so long really did make the world seem way too bright for his personal comfort.

"Drew, I was just looking for you." A voice to Drew's left, toward the showers sounded. Drew furrowed his brows quixotically as he saw Tom approach, a small notebook in hand. "I have orders from Chef to help Corsica to the mess hall, so I was just wondering if you could take this back to Hayato? It's his notebook."

Tom held the notebook out to Drew, who took it with his right hand. With his left, Drew pointed to him. "Isn't that the dude on the Yee-Haws who is super whipped for that blonde chick? You know the one with the..." Drew retracted his hands to his chest, mimicking the way large breasts appear on women by shaping them with his hands.

Tom cleared his throat, not wanting to put Brianna in that label. "Yes, her name is Brianna. I do think it would be beneficial if they simply got their feelings out of the way. I couldn't imagine holding something like that inside for so long." He sighed longingly, shrugging his shoulders. "But what do I know? I'll see you soon."

Tom vanished into the infirmary, leaving both a very dizzy, yet very motivated Drew to scheme.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

Just before the start of the next challenge, the contestants ate what appeared to be pasta in the mess hall of Fort Bragg. The two teams sat at two separate tables, diverted by a podium that rested atop of a stage-looking median, with two chairs behind it.

Drew ambled into the mess hall, peering at the heads of the Yee-Haws until he spotted Hayato, who sat beside Brianna. "Hayato! Pst, come here!" He gestured wildly, much to Hayato's confusion.

"W-What does he want?" Brianna asked, twisting some pasta around her fork. Hayato shrugged, patting her shoulder with a soft grin as he walked over to Drew, his smile falling the moment Brianna was out of his site.

"What do you want?" He grumbled, folding his arms over her chest. Drew chuckled, holding Hayato's notebook out to him. "You can drop the macho act, I'm just here to give this back to you."

Hayato's face fell, blinking in surprise as he took the notebook. "Oh, thank you. I must have left it in the confessional earlier today."

Drew rocked back and forth, drawing his head closer to the male. "Listen dude, I see the way you interact with Blondie. From one beautiful man to another, I say you lock it down. You gotta go big, or you gotta go home. Chicks dig huge gestures."

Hayato glanced behind him unsurely, looking to Brianna as she laughed alongside Tonia and Meredith. "Do you think so?"

Clapping his hand on his shoulder, Drew flashed Hayato a wink. "My man, I know so." With that, Drew departed from Hayato, joining his team just as Corsica and Tom walked in.

Suddenly, the lights darkened, a single spotlight radiating onto the podium as Chef emerged from somewhere behind it, tapping the microphone. The feedback echoed, signaling Chef to begin speaking. "War is not just physical, it is mental. That is why..."

The lights suddenly turned colorful as cheerful music sounded from speakers placed across the mess hall. "You're going to be doing a roast! The first person to make me laugh or piss off the other team enough that physical violence ensues, wins!"

Meredith peered upward at the lights, scrunching her nose in confusion. "Do you think Fort Bragg just has party lights laying around, or did the production team have to install them?"

"Alright campers!" Chris entered, wearing a tuxedo and holding two white shawls, both inscribed with the word "Master of Comedy" in purple Comic Sans. "You're going to choose two representatives from your team to go on-stage together in a roast battle!"

Cohen and Reggie looked at each other nervously, before looking back to the stage.

"You have a minute to choose your representative, so get choosing!" Chris continued, before taking a seat in one of the two chairs behind the podium, with Chef joining him in the empty one.

On the Yee-Haws' side, Bubba quickly pointed to Kyle and Luciana. "It has to be one of these two. A roast is about the fine-art of being subtle and," he nervously moved his fingers to Sophie and Mira. "I think they'll get mad easily."

Sophie and Mira opened their mouths to protest, their eyes narrowed, and their fists clenched, when Mitch stepped in. "Being pragmatic, Mira and Sophie will get pissed off. I can see the Yankees picking Drew or Corsica, so it has to be Kyle or Luciana."

Luciana shook her head, reclining her feet on the table. "Count me out, it takes me time to think of a good comeback. Kyle should do it."

Kyle smirked, standing up and bounding to the stage. "I won't let you guys down!"

Seeing that Kyle had been chosen, Corsica huffed, resting his elbow on his table and placing his chin in his hand. "Well, that was totally expected of them."

AJ drummed her fingernails against the table, before snapping her fingers. "We have to do something unexpected. If we throw them off with our choice, we'll have a leg up." Knowing that she was going to be met with controversy, she pointed to her choice.

"It has to be him."

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

Music played once more, party lights bouncing off every corner of the room. Chris stood at the podium, a large grin on his face. "Welcome to the Total Drama roast! Today, we have two contestants that need no introduction, but I am going to do so anyway!" He gestured to the Yee-Haws. "For the Yee-Haws, we have the baseball bro, the second part of the bromance with Luciana, Kyle!"

Kyle ambled to the stage, waving to the audience which consisted just of the two teams. He took his place on one side of the podium, looking to the Yankees.

"For the Yankees, he's a short king, he went on a field trip with a middle school, and Chef thinks his comedy is terrible, so why is he here? It's Ash!"

The Yankees cheered as Ash pushed his glasses up his nose, standing on the other side of the podium, smiling to Chris.

(CONFESSIONAL CAM)

"I was surprised when AJ said I should represent our team. It took some convincing on her part to get me up there," Ash clenched his fist in placid determination. "So, I can't let her down!"

(END OF CONFESSIONAL CAM)

"Since the Yee-Haws won, they can go first. They get to set the pace, and ultimately decide who wins and who doesn't win. So Kyle," Chris took a step back, sitting in his chair. "The mic is yours."

Kyle adjusted a fake tie, leaning against the podium by both of his forearms. "Alright, I'll be honest. The Yankees never cease to amaze me. Like let's take Tom for example. That guy radiates the energy of being a pompous British man hell-bent on control, but joke's on me, he's not even British."

Tom narrowed his eyes, laughter ringing out around him, but not from Chris or Chef. However, they were smiling.

"But hey! Hey! There's also so good on the Yankees, like let's take AJ and Bea. They're so cute and small, and you could probably throw them around." Kyle smirked, pointing to Drew. "Just like Drew's doing to Bea's heart, am I right?"

Bea's eyes widened, her face flushing as Drew regarded her with confusion. "What does that mean?"

"I-It's just a roast, he's making jokes out of all of our expense." Bea justified in a harsh whisper, patting Drew's arm

"Who am I to talk about the Yankees without talking about the lazy one? And I don't mean Cohen." Kyle tipped his head to Corsica, smiling sweetly. "If Corsica is trying to make himself to be memorable by putting on all these characters, maybe he's just hiding how forgettable he really is?"

Corsica seethed, prompting Maisie to put a hand on his shoulder. "Control." She scolded, folding her hands on his lap.

"So, I don't want to get to ahead of myself. 'll let Ash take over. He'll need step stool, though." Kyle took a step back, regarding Ash kindly. "Good luck, dude."

Ash took his place at the podium, squinting at the harsh spotlight pointed at him. He exhaled into the mic, which squeaked in feedback at the slight noise. "O-Oh.." He stuttered, looking behind him to see Chef shaking his head.

Rubbing his clammy hands on his pants, Ash plucked the microphone from the podium, holding it in his hands. "On the first day, Bubba told me that he was afraid of giraffes. But I'm more scared of the fact that people are going to be calling him 'Bubba' into adulthood."

Ash took a step back, clearing his throat to deepen his voice. "Welcome to the firm, Mr. Kingston. Is there a name you prefer to go by?" He pretended to ask Bubba, imitating a large-scale CEO.

Switching sides, Ash suddenly changed his stance, mimicking the way Bubba stood. "Well, my friends call me Bubba." Even his tone of voice sounded scarily like Bubba's.

Ash looked out to the audience; his brows furrowed. "The name Bubba belongs to one thing only; an overweight bulldog with cardiac issues."

This roast made the Yankees regard him with surprise, their faces breaking into grins as they laughed. Even on the Yee-Haws' side, Bubba and Luciana were laughing.

"Okay, I don't want to give Bubba too much flack, though. He's a nice dude. Oh!" Ash snapped his fingers. "Guess who I am?"

Ash pretended to flip a long braid, holding his hand out in front of him as if a phone was in his hand. "Oh my goodness! Thank you so much for watching my videos," His voice raised an octave, clearly imitating Tonia's voice. "If you want to use your parent's credit card to like, give me money, then I'll be like, so happy! EEK!"

This made Tonia crack a smile and laugh, shaking her head in disbelief that Ash was doing a good job.

"You know what's bad, Kyle?" Ash asked his partner, Kyle blinking in surprise that he was being dragged into the scene. Kyle shook his head, mildly curious as to where the punchline was going.

"It's so bad that you and Luciana, as a gay man and a gay woman, have a more believable romantic arc than Brianna and Hayato!" Ash finished with flourish, causing the whole room to erupt in laughter, except for Hayato.

"Now wait!" Hayato sounded, moving to the stage and taking the microphone from Ash, who stood back incredulously. "That's where you're wrong, alright?"

"Oh no..." Cohen murmured, slinking into the seat. "I can tell this is going to be cringe, bro."

Hayato paused, looking at Brianna longingly. "I know Brianna and I have been all over each other, but it's because we have a history. If any of you were reunited with someone like Brianna, you would feel the same way that I do."

Brianna's face reddened, her face falling as she looked up at Hayato, shocked that he was able to find her eyes in the darkness.

"Brianna, I have felt, SO strongly about you. I've known that for such a long time now, and now that I have you here with me again, I'm not going to let the chance slide by me again. I...I love you. I've loved you since we were kids, and when you left, I never stopped loving you."

Brianna's eyes filled with tears as her shoulders trembled, shaking her head. "C-Can you please...stop?" She squeaked, wiping her face as she walked off, only to be followed by Tonia.

Hayato watched her go, his mouth open, frozen in place by the words locked in his mouth. He had so much more to say. How could he mess this up?

"Uh, that technically was a team member getting pissed off, so the Yankees win!" Chef announced, though no one cheered.

However, in the darkness, Tom smiled.

(YEE-HAWS RV)

Hayato stood outside of the confessional, waiting for Brianna to come out. When the door cracked, his face brightened, only for him to see Tonia. "Is she okay?"

Tonia rolled her eyes, pursing her lips at him. "Like, no! She hates big gestures, and you made her feel embarrassed"

Hayato's brows scrunched together, as he remembered what Drew said to him. God, was he really so desperate that he took advice from a guy like that?

"Just give her some time. Let her have a few minutes, and then talk to her." Tonia advised, touching his shoulder. "Apologize first."

Tonia walked into the living room, where the Yee-Haws beside Bubba, Hayato and Brianna had gathered. Hayato followed along with Tonia, but kept himself tucked out of the hallway, unseen by the others.

"What Hayato did was uncalled for, he lost the challenge for us." Sophie reasoned, painting her nails a dark red color.

Mira chimed in soon after, having been perched on the back of the sofa. "I told y'all, Hayato and Brianna's garbage would bring us down. Now, Hayato done goofed, and he brought us down again."

Hayato's head fell, his eyes regarding the floorboards below him. How was it that he had been in the kitchen that morning, chopping an apple with Brianna, and watching the sunrise with her? How had everything gone so wrong?

The door to the confessional opened, and Brianna's small frame emerged from the crack, her eyes puffy, and her nose squeaking as she sniffled. She looked to Hayato, taking a deep breath before walking up to him.

"I-I don't get why you had to do that." Brianna fumbled with her sleeve, looking up as Hayato opened his mouth to speak. "Let me talk." She reprimanded him, with a sharpness to her voice that she didn't even know.

"Y-You had no right to try to dictate my feelings. I felt so pressured, and I felt every pair of eyes on me, even the camera crew! I have felt the same way for so long, but I wanted to tell you in m-my time, under conditions I f-felt comfortable with! You know me, Hayato, why would I ever be comfortable with a huge gesture like that?" Brianna cross-examined, her eyes slowly narrowing as she felt the anger grow within her.

Hayato wordlessly shrugged, bowing his head in embarrassment "I don't know, and I am sorry. I'm so ashamed of myself for being selfish."

Brianna bit her lower lip, a few tears escaping her eyes. "I just need some time to feel okay again, alright?" She stepped back, heading further back into the RV toward the sleeping area, where Bubba was also taking a nap. Hayato moved into the bathroom, closing the door behind him.

Meanwhile, in the living room part of the RV, Alex spoke up. "I don't mean to be that person, but I don't think we should send Hayato home. Sure, what he did was super embarrassing but he's a physical asset...But Bubba isn't."

Meredith soon responded, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "I agree, if the challenges are going to get more physical, then we need to send Bubba home. He's a nice guy, but not a physical competitor. We can encourage Brianna and Hayato to solve this drama on their own time, but I feel more confident of them performing in challenges than Bubba."

A few contestants exchanged glances in deafening silence, before Mitch spoke up. "Bubba's great, but they're right. So, is everyone in?"

Just as Hayato walked out of the bathroom, he wiped his eyes, the backs of his hands wet. "So, he's going home. Easy peasy." Luciana's voice sounded from the living room, making Hayato's posture slouch once more.

Maybe he did deserve to go home, after all.

(ELIMINATION)

The Yee-Haws sat on the roof of the RV, the fire illuminating the North Carolina night sky. An air of tension hung in the air, as for the first time, Brianna and Hayato sat on different sides of the group.

"If you don't receive a marshmallow, you will not be allowed to come back, ever!" Chris echoed, opening his mouth to announce the names of the marshmallow recipients, when Hayato stood up.

"Chris," Hayato began, each head slowly turning toward him. "I would like to eliminate myself from the game."

Luciana's eyes widened, her hand gripping Kyle's arm, while Mira gaped in surprise. "Oh s****…" She whispered, the censor bleeping her curse.

Chris examined the disheveled man before him, clearly at a loss as to why he would want to remove himself from the competition. "Are you sure, dude? Just stick around for the ceremony..."

Hayato cut him off, walking toward the fire. "I'm sure, I've made a fool of my team, myself, and Brianna today. I don't believe I should continue." Looking to Brianna, Hayato bowed to her. "Brianna, my feelings are still true, but I am too ashamed of myself to continue." He then winked. "Win for me."

Brianna rose to her feet, walking up to the male and wrapping her arms around him. "I will. I know you are doing this for you, so I'll win for you, too!"

Chris dabbed his eyes with a tissue, and Sophie regarded the situation with a look of disgust. "Ugh, please get them out of my site."

(YANKEES' RV)

On the RV, the team was minding their own business for the most part, huddled off into their groups, except for Tom, who wrote something in his notebook, which was rested on the kitchen counter.

As Kaisa entered the kitchen, she reached above Tom's head, grabbing a glass for water, when her eyes downcast toward the notebook. "Hey, that looks like the type of paper that the Yee-Haws' had their map on." She observed.

Tom smiled courteously, closing his notebook.

(CONFESSIONAL CAM)

"It wasn't hard, you know." Tom opened his notebook. "Right after the Appalachian Trail challenge, at that rest stop, I overheard Chris and Chef talk to a production assistant about the maps. So, this morning, I drew out a copy of my own map and snuck off just as we got into Fort Bragg, switching out the two. Chef would have been too prideful to point out a difference, so he went with it."

Suddenly, a smirk spread along Tom's face. "That was my only intention; to make their journey more difficult. When I found Hayato's notebook, everything else fell into place."

Suddenly, the scenes fell into place.

Tom finding Hayato's notebook and reading it to find that he had written out his crush for Brianna. Tom overhearing that Brianna didn't like surprises. Tom giving the notebook to Drew to give to Hayato, as he knew Drew was one for lavish gestures.

"I simply planted the seeds. The chaos grew on its own. I wonder what I can do next." Tom chuckled darkly, before the screen faded to black.

well... hi! this was unexpected, even for me. BUT i haven't abandoned this. so, here's a long chapter.

I hope you guys enjoyed some drama 😊

tell me what you think below! a hint for the next chapter, it's pretty "magic!"