Yagami'd!

Author's Note: Set during Digimon Adventure 02. Enjoy the story and R&R.

Disclaimer: I do not own anything related to or of the Digimon series.

Pairings: Pre-slash Daisuke x Takeru. Referenced established Taichi x Yamato, one-sided Takeru x Taichi.

Summary:

Motomiya Daisuke unwittingly intrudes on someone else's relationship, and the Chosen Children's solution to his problem is unconventional, to say the least.

Yagami Hikari guided Motomiya Daisuke into the computer lab by his shoulders, deftly directing his body to avoid bumping into an AV cart. The soccer player held a clump of tissue around an ice pack over his bloody nose. The nick was fresh, and only stung a fraction compared to his damaged pride.

Inoue Miyako, Hida Iori, and Takaishi Takeru were hung up on their tardy team members, their latest voyage to the Digital World suddenly postponed due to unforeseen epistaxis. Curious themselves, Chibimon, Poromon, Upamon, and Patamon lugged over their overstuffed bellies, full of snacks.

Chibimon scrunched. "Daishuke! You're bweeding!"

"Don't look at me! It's horrible!" he fumed dramatically.

"But –!"

"Don't. Look."

"What's the problem?" Takeru asked the obvious question.

"My gorgeous action hero looks are history! That's what!"

"Don't be such a baby! It can't be that bad!" Miyako said in a huff, backhanding his arm to get him to show them what the big fuss was about.

Red rivulets dripped out both his nostrils, refilling the dry, flaky rills veining his upper lip.

"Gwah! Put it back! Put it back!" Chibimon panicked, to which Daisuke resealed the wound and shot Miyako an "I told you so."

Tailmon crept up behind Hikari.

"This is your fault!" Daisuke designated Takeru.

"Me? I've been here the whole time. What could I have done?" His boots seemed to have taken on extra weight.

"Okay, maybe not you. Your brother! I can't believe this!"

Hikari patted their leader and moral center. Apologetically? Embarrassed for him? Confused shrugs between Iori and Miyako indicated she'd have to fill them in.

"Daisuke-kun had an accident with Oniichan."

"Is Taichi-san hurt?" Iori jumped at the mention.

Swell. Dote on the victimizer. Not the injured party in the room!

"No, Oniichan is fine. I left my camera at home, and he brought it to me. Had to rush off to a prior engagement."

"With Yamato," Tailmon clarified.

"Oh…" Takeru's eyes shrank to dots. He saw where this was going.

"Supposedly, your brother makes a habit of surprise tackles!" Daisuke barked, all bite.

The feline Digimon crooked her ringless tail. "Taichi suspected Yamato was sneaking up on him."

"It was really Daisuke-kun coming to meet me," Hikari stated matter-of-factly. "So, when Daisuke-kun turned the corner –"

"Taichi-senpai kissed me!"

"And Daisuke ran face-first into a locker shortly after."

Takeru hahaha'd. Based on Daisuke's exaggerated performance, he prepared for worse. "That's all?"

For once, even Hikari was stunned. The kids studied Takeru's nonchalance (Obtuseness? Selective blindness?) with awkward unanimity.

"What? Taichi-san and Oniichan have been an item since I moved."

"Um, duh." Miyako absentmindedly squished Poromon like an accordion.

"That's not why we're shocked," Iori straightened out.

"Then why?"

"Taichi-senpai kissed me!" Daisuke whined again.

"And?" He must've missed the memo. "Haven't you ever wondered what it'd be like to kiss Taichi-san?"

"No."

"Nope."

They skipped Hikari, as the survey didn't apply to her.

"NO!" Daisuke replied the loudest.

"Huh. Just me, I guess."

Accepting an unenviable role as the group's collective voice, Hikari politely opined, "Takeru-kun…No need to be so forward."

"What's 'kissing,' dagya?" Upamon twitched his branchia.

Things went off-kilter from there, as far as Daisuke was concerned.

"Two hotheaded team captains? That won't do! You can't smack Yagami-senpai and Daisuke together! Personality clash! Their egos will implode!" Miyako sounded more and more like a women's digest column.

"Yamato-san would also be understandably mad."

"We should find Daisuke his very own Yamato!"

The infant Digimon bounced in elated approval. "YA-MA-TO! YA-MA-TO!"

A chagrined Daisuke tried shutting down their line of argument. "Hey, you guys! I never agreed to –!"

"Takeru-kun fits. Them being brothers and all."

"I dunno…" Yamato's younger sibling mulled.

"You could pretend Daisuke-san is Taichi-san," Iori suggested level-headedly (at least, as level-headedly as the demented circumstances allowed).

Thinking it the best idea she heard all day, Hikari seized Daisuke's unbusy hand and linked it to Takeru's.

The boys rued her blunt, blatant attempt to pair them off.

"Hikari-chan, it doesn't work like that. Taichi-san is more than a pretty face," Takeru criticized; however, he didn't let go.

Gee, thanks! Daisuke scowled, offended everybody deemed him a poor man's Taichi, and Takeru in particular named him a defective replacement at that. Completely glossing over Takeru considering his face pretty.

Miyako did the math. "Daisuke kissed Yagami-senpai. By the transitive property, that means you'd be kissing Yagami-senpai!"

Before Daisuke could object, Takeru laid a clumsy wet one on him, careful to nonetheless refrain from aggravating Daisuke's bloody nose situation.

Iori debriefed his partner, "That's kissing, Upamon."

Daisuke chewed the inside of his cheek. Takeru concentrated his sheepish gaze on the windows.

"Takeru, look at me!"

He complied warily with the strict order.

Daisuke stared at Takeru and became woozy. He maladroitly spun his frenemy in the other direction. "Show's over!"

"But you ju –!"

"No, I didn't! No, I didn't! Chosen Children, let's roll!"

"That's my line!" Miyako raged.

"Digital Gate, open!" Daisuke had already related his D-3 to the monitor, and been sucked in alongside Chibimon.

Miyako and Poromon sailed in after him, followed by Iori and Upamon.

Takeru, Hikari, and their Digimon set out last.

"Did it work?" Takeru legitimately had doubts.

"Exquisitely, and without a hitch! Daisuke-kun's hooked! Some accidentally-on-purpose elbow rubs here and there, and he's yours, Takeru-kun!"

"I hope you're right."

"Got to pay back Oniichan for his part in our little charade, though," Hikari reminded him of his debt.

"How about I pay Taichi-san back in kisses?"

She giggled. "If you're sure Yamato-san won't kill you for it! By all means, kiss to your heart's content!"