Disclaimer. Harry Potter is property of JKR, Warner Bros and Scholastic publishing. Barchoke belongs to the amazing fanfiction writer, RobSt. The idea for this fic is mine. I know it was a crazy one, but in the development, there was a lot of fun, tears, and tantrums.

I will like to give thanks to the Higher Power, finally the Epilogue.

A big hug and kiss to my home team of cheerleaders. My mom and my son.

A ton of gratitude to my friend and Alpha SlytherinSal.

A big shout out to Marc the Unruly, thanks M, I know this was a difficult journey for you, but now we are here, thanks again.

All my love to Noppoh, girl, this was a difficult period, still, you listened and for that I am grateful, you're the best.

To the followers and fans of this fic, real-life sometimes delivers surprises and, I was not the exception to the rule. Thanks for your support.

To the haters, trolls, anonymous (meaning malicious guest, ghost) reviewers. I don't feed the trolls. If you don't like the story move ahead.

To the rest, enjoy the read and leave a review.

Madie080802.

-oo0oo-

Warning, bashing of Dumbledore, Lucius Malfoy, Dolores Umbridge and, the Weasleys. Lots of fluff and humor.

Epilogue.

22 June 2009. 33 St Marion and corner with Swan Ln, Wellington, New Zealand. 8 pm.

Flamel's residence.

Nicholas and Perenelle felt the wards from their home shiver as a black crane landed at their gate. Romi opened the window and the odd bird delivered a message. A sphere of light gave way to a projection and, what a sight; James and Jane singing a duet. It's a hard day's night at the karaoke, while Sally and Echo danced. Hephaestus spoke:

"Ding dong, the bitches are dead… The ones on the dance floor are the new enforcers of Justice and yes, Sally is going to be the bridesmaid and Echo and James are battle brothers. Don't expect them to return home in such a state… They are all celebrating that they out-drank Dionysus...Thanatos! For crying out loud! Nobody wants to see you naked… Except for the donkey, look at that beast will you? He's frisky alright! I'll be damned… I never thought I would see the day that Death would flee from Lust... … No Thanatos, I will not make my dog your shield, stop whining...fine!… What was I saying before? Ah yes, your children will be returning tomorrow, good night." The image faded.

Black Keep. 23 June 2009. Time chamber. 6:00 am.

James woke up and on all fours and crawled to the bathroom looking for a sober up potion. Instead, he found a very small dose of ambrosia with his name on it. He took it, and as he was chewing, his senses returned and his hangover dissipated. He got into the shower and started to shave. The man was brushing his teeth when he felt a cool breeze as a second figured joined. She hissed as she felt the hot spray of water hit her skin. She was chewing ambrosia as well and soon, she breathed with ease. She said:

"Remind me to never ever take on another wager against Dionysus."

He noticed, as she began to get comfortable around their mutual nudity, how genuine and natural her stance was. Her hips swayed as she moved and located the wash cloth, proceeding to cover her skin with scented cleanser.

It dawned on him that he had yearned all his life for this type of intimacy, and the subtle displays of beauty that it carried.

He stood still, just as though he was witnessing a field of flowers bloom. In a similar way, he knew that he favored the reflection of light and water all over her dermis. What a marvel for him to uncover the shift in coloring, as her whole body acquired a shade of exquisite dusky pink.

James took the soap and created suds to cover her back.

Jane turned her head slightly, in true feline fashion. She stretched her neck and took delight in James' beautiful long fingers, as he caressed her back rearranging the bubbles.

After, she gently placed her back against his chest, and got a bit startled by the heat of his skin. He smiled and added:

"Relax, it's only me."

"It's never only just you, James… You are my everything."

She breathed, took his hand, and kissed his palm. James started trembling, tears and dew from the spray filled his eyes, and his cheek and forehead touched her face.

23 June 2009. Black Keep. Time Chamber. 6:30 am.

Jane Le Grange's diary.

I woke up and walked to the bathroom. The noise of the shower alerted me that it was in use. My head, my body and my stomach hurt. I found a small portion of ambrosia and it read: "No questions Granger, eat me." I smiled. I knew that calligraphy, so I ate and entered the shower. Just as I felt my senses returning, I said:

"Remind me to never ever take on another wager against Dionysus."

I looked at James and his body was so enticing and muscular, and I smiled at our proximity. I washed all over and for a second enjoyed the sensation of renewal. It was then that James held onto me. My body responded, my skin held memory. I longed for and could now respond to him. No more loving in the shadows, my skin felt, and with it, my senses made a return.

His hands, the water, the skin of his lips, and the madness of the void without him, they all manifested. I kissed him and cornered him, held his head while I tasted the nectar of his mouth He began moaning and in a moment of clarity, I understood that in his agony, I too lost sight of my restraint. My skin, my mind, my spirit, everything just cried: MORE!

His voice calmed me. Still my skin burned, and I wanted to die and be born again in this fire.

23 June 2009. Black Keep, time chamber. 7:00 am.

On the other side of the time chamber, Sally and Echo walked, holding hands and enjoying the valley. Suddenly, they heard a growl, and the sky illuminated. A phoenix and a onyx dragon were fighting. Sally turned to Echo and questioned:

"Why are those creatures fighting?"

"Come along Sally, they are not fighting."

"Echo, they are fighting, look?..."

"No Sally, they are not. Those creatures are astral projections of the vessels of death and destiny, and no they are not fighting, they are courting each other."

"How can that be a courtship? They are biting, throwing fire and lightning… and why are you blushing?"

"Believe me, Sally, I know you are too young and innocent, but they are not fighting. They both want to dominate and now..."

"Oh, look Echo? They look like they are forming a new star..."

"Sally, they are welcoming the river of souls."

"That's frightening."

"Believe me, when two beings have gone through so much sorrow and they are given happiness, stars are formed in the sky… Come with me Sally, let's make a star of our own?"

In the heavens, a dragon held a phoenix from the neck, and as the two fell from the sky, the song of the Phoenix filled the chamber.

23 June 2009. Flamel's residence. 10 am.

James, Jane, Sally, and Echo stood in the presence of the Flamels and the Wilkins. James nodded and got down on his knees. He presented a box to Jane while saying:

"Jane, I promised that I would ask you once I was sober… I can't live without you. I tried and it was a life not worth living. You breathed hope into my soul; you were the only one crazy enough to love me… Even though I was an undeserving moron. I still am, actually, but you are stubborn and you loved me, just me… I'm far from perfect, but if you will just give me a chance? I'll be a better friend, a partner in crime, and the one that will rub your feet. I'll even be the brave one that will take the books out of your hands and direct you to bed, no matter if you show claws in disagreement… What I mean to say is: will you marry me?"

Daniel Wilkins was about to protest, but Mrs. Flamel beat him to the punch: "Excuse me?"

Jane was oblivious to the world around as she looked at a small box and its contents. The engagement ring, a work of delicate filigree, went through a bit of change in its design as a moment later, the locket on Jane's chest shifted and moved itself to integrate into the ring presented to her. Tears of joy started pouring of her eyes.

James heard a whispered reply: "Yes."

Daniel and Perenelle were gobsmacked when Romi made an appearance and six children came close to the newly engaged couple.

The adults witnessed the children, as one group, embracing Jane and James. Afterwards, the little ones started talking in quiet hisses.

Sally smiled and added to the couples: "It's alright, they are all saying congratulations in Parseltongue."

Emma turned and looked at Sally, her stance changing. Sally stood frozen by her attitude, and Jane sensed the shift. Doctor Wilkins asked: "What happened Sally?"

Jane stepped in and said: "Mom"

Emma raised her hand and cut of Jane's argument: "No Jane, she has to say it."

Sally nodded and added: "I've made a mistake, Doctor Wilkins."

Jane insisted: "Mom"

Emma looked Jane in the eye and said: "I have to hear it from her… Let her speak, Jane."

The place went silent and Sally was tearing up, but she raised her head and spoke. A strange new phenomenon occurred: the adults started feeling hot and bothered, the children too began to feel restless.

"I'm sorry. I was so tired of being part of the background, tired of being alone. I was losing my mind and in a desperate move, I made a mistake that almost made me lose my soulmate, Echo. I'll leave now, I'm sorry."

Emma Granger noticed the magic that Sally was displaying and said to the girl: "Stop that Sally. You are distracting the older audience and giving a magical sugar rush to the children. I am not angry at you. Hephaestus, the god of the forge, relayed a message. You saved my children's lives. Jane already holds you in high esteem. Why didn't you asked for my help? I would have told you that James was head over heels in love with Jane… and had a series of magical bursts around him. Plus, most of the time, it was like he couldn't keep a shirt on. He just ended up shirtless as soon as he spotted Jane...Like a good researcher, I tested the theory and it was always Jane, though she was ignorant, or had her nose in a book… It was hilarious."

Jane raised an eyebrow and turned around to ask James:

"Is that true?"

James looked as though he had been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. He denied and then he ripped his shirt, a pair of majestic leather ebony wings making an appearance. Jordan and Robert displayed minuscule button folded wings and Lilith flew towards James with her own small pair of pearlescent wings.

Jane remembered and quoted from memory: "Little dragons have to learn how to walk before they spread their wings and fly. We do not skip a step… You said that, then tell me, how come Lilith was able to rip her wings and use them too?"

James held his boys and his girl and just smiled with contentment. He replied to Jane: "Because females develop faster...and she is going to be a lovable know-it-all that makes all the boys wonder if they like her or hate her. But, being the lovable dragon she is, she will rip their lungs out if they even blink the wrong way around her. She was born to be a queen, just like her mother."

The married men in the room nodded in agreement. Daniel Granger said: "Very good."

Nicholas on the other side was telling his wife: "Perenelle dear, he did spell it right, plus he is going to walk in our shoes."

Perenelle stilled in surprise. A smile graced her face and she added: "Dear me, you are right. Yes, okay, you can marry Jane."

To which Jane replied in doubt: "Wait, what?"

Right then, Sally had a revelation and added: "I have a message from the Fates..."

Jane, James, the two married couples, and the children, all looked at Sally. She nodded and revealed:

"By the will of the fates, the Flamel's and the Granger-Wilkins will bear more children. So mote it be! "

White light and fire enveloped the two elderly couples, who promptly fainted. The real question for Sally was, was it an overwhelming feeling of joy, or was it fright? Then again Echo embraced her, so she must have done well. "Good," she reassured herself.

It is then that the remaining guests heard the laughter of the ancient house elf. Romi was enjoying the outcome, and she levitated the unconscious ones out of the room. She said: "Isn't balance wonderful?"

Black Keep. Time chamber. Simultaneous to the conversation between Emma and Sally.

One Butler elf, bound from his extremities to a four poster bed - bound though not gagged - was looking with interest to his four captors. The four in question were wearing nothing more than veils. Kreacher felt only gratitude. Being bonded to the freak Harry James Potter Black was now the best thing that had ever happened to any elf. But to have four potential sister wives looking at oneself like a bowl of cream to feed four ravenous kitties was heaven. His eyes shone with unshed tears, which annoyed his wives to be. Lula spoke:

"Afraid?"

"No"

Nona asked:

"Why do you cry then?"

"I'm not crying."

Rina asked:

"... and these are not tears?"

"They are"

Nona asked:

"Are you sure you are not crying?"

"Do tears of joy count as crying?"

Lula asked:

"So you are happy to be bound to a bed?"

"Yes I am."

"Why?"

"Because you keep forgetting that this is my home, my rules, and I will seal the bond with the four of you."

Nona said:

"You are insane."

"I agree. However, I'm not alone in my madness."

Then his clothing disappeared and his sculpted body greeted the four sets of eyes. The four females realized he looked really, really good for one old and decrepit elf.

The lights went out, and his uniform vanished, the Elf in question was the lord of the castle. Kreacher smiled as one by one the magic bound each of the females to the bed. He snapped his fingers and a feeble light came back. He froze Rina, Lula, and Kay, and released the leader Nona out of stasis. He approached her and whispered:

"By the right of conquest I claim you my wife, Nona, do you contest me?"

The bride elf blushed and cried in protest, however, the magic was swirling and she answered in a strangled voice:

"I accept."

"Now, let's put those binds to the test, shall we?"

Four brides later, Kreacher was summoned:

"Master called?"

James Black raised an eyebrow as his usually picture perfect butler sported claw marks on his face. His clothes were almost in shreds, and he looked like he chose the items to wear in a hurry. Never mind the look of utter happiness shone in his aura. James blushed since his servant was also sweating, however, the master asked his elf:

"Yes Kreacher, have you seen Rina, Kay, Lula, and Nona?"

"They are indisposed at the moment, I'm afraid."

"What happened to you Kreacher?"

Kreacher blushed and blinked, then a small growl made everyone gasp. Romi started shining and said in a low voice:

"You better run, butler, unless you want a fifth wife and believe me, those four were just the beginning. When I'm done with you, your head will be spinning."

James cleared his throat and said:

"Um"

There was nothing more to say.

-oo0oo-

Close to Nine months later.

Harry's Dicta Quill notes...

A Dicta Quill and parchment were activated by Harry's magic. The dicta quill fluttered and Harry's voice was recorded.

"Hermione I'm sorry, I shouldn't have. But I found your diary, the one you made as you were taking therapy back in the year 2000, and I just couldn't keep my nose out of it. For that, I'm sorry, but I'm not sorry for learning more about you. So, I'll make my own version of that Dicta Quill journey and then you can read it."

Harry sighed and added. "You're right, looking back is painful. Understanding that winning the war was really the start of true life for me. Don't get me wrong, I knew I was alive before the end of the conflict, but only because I was breathing. Being alive, living, that was a different thing.

"Coming to terms with that part of me. Like, I don't know, being locked in a cupboard under the stairs since I was a babe. Running from death from the moment I set foot on Hogwarts, people dying and you, Hermione, getting injured thanks to my idiocy, was a nightmare to digest, much less to integrate into my experience. You knew since we met that I was short sighted being, eager for love and acceptance, and alone, no matter how crowded the room was.

"And then, the war was over. We were being dosed with potions and raped by the Weasleys until fate decided to intervene. You with the death of James Arthur and me when Barchoke decided to test me for loyalty potions while in Gringotts. Only after that did I realize the extent of the damage in my life and yours, and what do I do? I take the easy way out; I anesthetize myself with alcohol and grief. I'm not proud of myself but then, chance doesn't give up on me, my fate doesn't give up on me. Then you, you don't give up on me either, and yeah, I deserved your anger. I was a jerk back in 2005, but then again, what did you expect from a short sighted misfit hobbit that didn't know which way was up even with a neon banner pointing straight ahead?

"On the lighter side of things, I have to say that I always loved your wicked way of dispensing justice. Gluing Ron's testicles had me rolling on the floor for days and days. It was that image that chased away my nightmares. That is, until I recalled that you vanished from wizarding England. Afterwards? Well, who ever said that life was a journey from point A to point B forgot to add that the road in between is just as crooked as Dumbledore's nose.

"Ugh, creepy bastard! I will not dignify him with elaborating on my last statement. Just believe me when I say that he got his comeuppance. Then there was that period of time that I like to call the dark ages. I don't recall them and maybe it's better, because every second without you was just pain.

"I cannot place the first moment I accepted that I was in love with you. But when it dawned on me, it was similar to the Neanderthals discovering fire. I burned and nothing made sense without you in my life. I mean, I could exist before you, but you are color, magic, and my senses. You are the light, the warmth, my north. I love you Hermione."

Harry felt Hermione's touch as she asked, "Harry, what are you doing here? Is that my Dicta Quill and diary?"

"Yeah, I was adding a note."

Hermione Accioed the parchment, read Harry's addition, and started shedding tears. "Harry, I don't know what to say, except for maybe, I'm sorry for my parents and the Flamels being crazy over your approach to ask for my hand in marriage."

Harry smiled and added, "Merlin help us, they were formidable. But then, I think of Lilith and she is going to have parents, grandparents and the Flamels backing her up, woe on the poor bastard who comes seeking for my daughter or for those daughter's hand in marriage. We will make it into a family tradition, to scare the daylights of the next contender."

"No, you will not Harry Potter."

"But that's the thing, my dear, I'm not just Harry Potter, not anymore. I'm a doctor, and I can look for any excuse to bring out the medieval side of my practice if a twerp so much makes my girl, or any of my girls, cry."

"No, no you don't. If you think for a second that I will let you do it alone, you are sadly mistaken," added Hermione.

"Have I told you how much I love you today?" asked Harry with a hint of playfulness.

"Oh, I kind of figured you must love me, since your seed decided to take lodging in my womb. Again. You were supposed to be getting me the natural Hummus for dipping my chips in it, right?"

"Of course I got the Hummus. You would not believe me if I told you who I bumped into before arriving here?" asked Harry,

"Who?"

"Well, the most infamous mismatched couple to grace the English isles. Yes, the Malfoys."

"What's mismatched about Draco and Astoria?" asked Hermione as she dipped her apple sun-dried chips and smiled.

Harry snorted and chuckled, then cleared his throat. "No, Hermione, no, it was not the heir of the Malfoy's but his father who has actually married again."

Hermione's baby bump served as a table as she dipped. Harry decided that it was a good idea to remove the dish and other items, since the information was going to surprise his wife.

"Lucius Malfoy married again? What happened?" asked Hermione

"Narcissa divorced him, but it seems love found its way to his cold heart, because he married Dolores Umbridge," answered Harry.

"What! You're kidding right?" asked Hermione, turning on her belly to look at Harry.

"Nope, true story. Now they are both retired and avoid public life. It seems both are welcome as a dung bomb. Wherever they step in… fate made an example of them. Both of them are as powerful as squibs, forgotten by their former friends and allies and now only clinging to each other. Fate is a fickle set of ladies."

"Are you regretting coming back to Britain?" asked Hermione.

"No, not really. We got to visit Hogwarts and congratulate Nev on his growing family. I got Hannah Longbottom gaining a blush as she recognized me as Dr. Black. I'm sure Nev got mauled by his wife that night; you're welcome Nev."

Hermione started laughing and sent a pillow to her husband's face. "Get off your high horse, Dr. Black, and remember you were feeding me the chips and Hummus?"

"Oh, right, how are you? I mean, you were the one to close the cycle for your unfortunate ancestors, oh mighty heir of Ravenclaw?" asked Harry as he dipped a chip and fed it to Hermione.

"I don't know how to feel about that. Sally just came up to me and said that I needed to travel with her and Echo to Hogwarts and fulfill a promise she made to the Grey Lady. Come to think about it, nothing is ever simple with us, is it?" asked Hermione.

"Oh, simple, normal, how boring. Nah, for us there is nothing as plebeian as that; it's always, go big or go home," said Harry as he shook his head.

"Yeah, you're right. I'm still pissed at you for reading my diary," added Hermione.

"Why?" asked Harry.

"Well, part of that script was intimate," replied Hermione.

"I know. I mean, you really were checking me out, even though I was a dork, scrawny and daydreaming about Cho? I mean, wow, I don't deserve you."

"Oh my god, Harry!" Hermione sent another pillow which Harry dodged with ease as he added, "But, but, I'm your dork now, so there, you lucky woman you." as he winked at her.

"Oh, really? Well, don't think I forgot about that thing you kept doing back in Sydney?" accused Hermione.

"What thing?" asked Harry as he curled an eyebrow.

"You kept losing shirts. Merlin, even my mother was taking notice."

Harry was trying but failed and started laughing. Then, his wings ripped through his current shirt, as Hermione's eyes went round as saucers. He inquired, "You mean like this?"

"Yeah. Was that it, your wings required space?" asked Hermione.

"No, not only that. I'm a dragon; I want to court and make sure you're comfortable, kill the annoying people who make you even pout and I want you to see how sexy I am. But we already agreed that you are a strong independent woman who will not be swayed by such displays of testosterone and magic. So?" He snapped his fingers, his shirt went back on.

"Very considerate of you, and of course I will not objectify you, or treat you as a piece of meat. Besides, at the moment I feel as sexy a humpback whale, and it's all your fault. You had to get me pregnant with triplets again, didn't you?"

"Oh god, well it was your fault, really?" retorted Harry.

"What?" asked Hermione in a small voice.

"I mean, we've just got back from an epic party at the temple of the Moirai. We were back in the Black fortress and I was taking a shower, minding my own business. Then you walk in, naked, gorgeous, golden. I mean, what was I supposed to do? Not make love to you? You seduced me. I was only responding to your sumptuous presence. I am not made of stone you know; I'm the victim here and what's wrong with your body? You have a beautiful belly and I love your breasts and your crazy libido, which of course doesn't objectify me. But it does have odd schedule, like, for example, while I'm driving, coming out of my office, eating porridge, I'm exhausted, or after battle. Uhm, Hermione dear, uh, I don't want to hurt the children, you know you are on your third trimester?" said Harry as he found himself naked on his back and looking at his wife sizing him up as though he was a bowl of cream about to feed a feral feline.

"Oh, don't worry about that. Now be a good husband and say you love my body again," said Hermione.

Harry's sat up, open his arms in a welcoming gesture as his wings flared, he added, "I love you, Hermione."

Hermione smiled and said, "I knew I married a smart man. I love you Harry." Then, Hermione joined him in a kiss.

The End.