Chapter 15 - Pain & Guilt

A/N: …...so it's been a while again.

I hope you're all safe and ok with everything going on. Please be safe and careful when going out, though you already know this because duh, no one wants to get sick and die. I pray and wish that you all will be safe. Also keep in mind of others and to not hoard supplies because there are others who need it desperately. Share if you can and help others be careful.

Warning: Towards the end it gets sad with Shanks, involving deep sadness and guilt.

Read and Enjoy~

Next Afternoon...

"Please! Don't do this! We're friends aren't we?!"

"Friends? Don't make me laugh, in this situation friendship is dead and nothing else matters but coming out on top. Now stop running and just meet your end!"

Pakky ran with all his might. His legs ached immensely and his lungs burned intensely. He'd been running for what felt like forever, and it seemed with Yasopp easily chasing him that he would keep running for even longer.

How were his other crewmates? Did Nora get caught? Was Deuce gone too? He hoped desperately that his friends were all right.

If only Ace were here… then they might've had a better chance against the Red Hairs-

BAM!

Pakky yelped in shock as someone tackled him, sending them both rolling.

They ended up stopping in front of a tree and Pakky was then face to face with his assailant, who of course was his mentor, Yasopp. The man had finally caught up with him - (or more like grew tired of playing cat and mouse) - and took him down. Quite painfully, he might add.

Yasopp grinned viciously at him from above, not letting go and continuing pinning him down. "Seems like I've caught you. Now tell me, where are your fellow Spades?" he questioned.

Pakky squirmed helplessly until giving up on trying to break free. He scowled at the elder sniper and said, "Like I'll tell you! I may be defeated but my friends still have hope!"

A dark chuckle rumbled out of Yasopp's chest. He gave the younger sniper an amused smile and said lowly, "What makes you think that? Already a little more than half of your crew is gone. Lucky Roo already took out Fin, Gremma, and Nora. I think Rockstar got Deuce right about now, or at least about to. Maybe your First Mate will be the last one standing."

Pakky stared at Yasopp in shock. He didn't know that many members of the Spades were gone! He thought that maybe there would be a bit more than that or that they would've held their ground better.

Pakky glared at Yasopp before yelling out loudly into the sky, "Deuce, wherever you are, avenge us!"

Ace faintly chuckled and said to Shanks, who was approaching behind him, "Seems like our crews have gotten a little bit out of hand with the game of tag."

Shanks hummed in amusement as he sat down beside him on a cliffside. Behind the two of them were the woods where their crews were playing tag, which sounded like screams of dying men. Shanks wouldn't be surprised if the civilians could hear them with how loud they were being and were concerned. In fact he should probably see that none of the crew members were actually hurt afterward.

He was shaken out of his thoughts when Ace asked, "Why aren't you with them? I'm sure they would've loved to have you. Though Fin probably would have nearly fainted with terror."

Shanks didn't say anything for a moment. He wondered if he should just give Ace a flimsy excuse and leave it at that but decided against it. So he turned to his apprentice and said honestly, "When I noticed you weren't with them I thought it'd be best to check on you. I know what I say doesn't really matter, but after last night I thought it would be wise for you to not be alone."

Ace stiffened at that and looked away. He didn't regret accepting Shanks' comfort and warm presence last night, but he still felt a bit childish. Then a darker part of him wondered if Shanks was only being nice to him because he was Roger's son.

He thought he was doing better about accepting help and comfort but Ace guessed not. Maybe he would always have trouble and difficulty doing that. Did that make him weak?

"And when I woke up this morning to find you staring at the ground blankly, I have to admit that ever since then I've been a bit worried," Shanks added.

Ace let out a deep sigh and loosened his muscles while also pushing his own thoughts away for later. "Shanks, I appreciate your concern and everything you've done for me and continue to do, but you don't have to constantly worry about me. I can handle myself. Trust me, I've been doing that since I was born."

That did not make Shanks feel any better but he held back from saying anything. So instead he just gave Ace a small smile and said, "I know you can handle yourself, Ace, but that doesn't mean I'll ever stop worrying about you. It's a mentor's job to worry about their apprentices." He ruffled Ace's hair for good measure and to somewhat lighten the mood.

Sure enough Ace chuckled and carefully pushed his hand away. He still sounded a bit glum but Shanks chose to not push him anymore. He didn't want to overwhelm Ace nor make him feel obligated to say anything to him. So until it was time to get up both mentor and apprentice sat in comfortable silence and enjoyed the view.

But Ace also happened to see Shanks wearing the gift he gave him last night. His cheeks flushed with embarrassment but a warm feeling grew in his chest. Shanks, of course, noticed and gave him a smile before gazing back out to the sea.

Ace joined him with a faint, happy smile.

"Ow ow ow! Deuce, can't you be more gentle?" Pakky whined in pain.

Deuce briefly glanced up from where he was inspecting his friend's knee to give him a glower before returning to his work. After a few more pokes, prods and scanning he sighed and stood up, finishing his inspection.

"Your knee is sprained, nothing major or bad but you need to take it easy for the next two days and ice it later," Deuce said. "But tell me, how in the four seas did you sprain your knee in a game of tag?"

Pakky huffed and pointed at Yasopp who gave him a betrayed look. "That crazy man tackled me!" he cried. He wouldn't admit it out loud but he was still scared from their encounter. The Red Hair had looked manic and being chased by a powerful pirate - a Red Hair pirate nonetheless! - was terrifying.

Deuce pinched the bridge of his nose. "I knew tag was a horrible idea. Why did I agree to go along with it?"

"Because you love us?" Nora piped up. Immediately she received a glare from the First Mate that made her shut up.

A heavy sigh interrupted them before anything else could happen and everyone turned to see Benn. The First Mate of the Red Hairs had his arms crossed and his usual expression of exasperation at their antics was there. He hadn't joined them in their game of tag and stayed behind on the ship, wanting to catch up on his reading and check on the other crew members. He also probably would have wiped out all of the Spades on his own. (And probably his own crewmates just for fun).

"Let's all just be glad nobody broke a bone, although I am sorry you were hurt, Pakky," Benn said. He started to regret not going with them to supervise but in the end Pakky most likely would have still ended up hurt. Yasopp was prone to get too excited when it came to games that involved chasing.

Benn glanced at Pakky one more time before saying, "And since Pakky is hurt and has to take it easy, we'll cancel today's training.

All the Spades raised their eyebrows collectively. Nora decided to be their voice and ask, "Are you sure?"

Benn rolled his eyes and nodded. "Yes I'm sure, and if you want you can consider your game of tag training for hiding and running," he said. "And in fact, for the next few days you all can take a break from training."

For a second the Red Hairs were worried that the Spades might faint in shock.

"Are you really sure? You don't have to do that!" Deuce exclaimed, eyes wide. His crewmates nodded along to what he said. They looked at Benn like he had grown another set of eyeballs.

"Like I just said, I'm sure," Benn assured. "It's good to take breaks and as far as I know you all haven't had one since we began training you. Besides, you kids deserve it." With that he gave them all a proud smile.

All of the Spades were stunned. They looked at the other Red Hairs to see if their First Mate was being serious, but all they saw was them giving proud smiles of their own. It felt… nice. It made them feel proud of themselves in return. To have these powerful and incredible pirates wanting to train them was amazing, but for them to even be proud of them was even more so.

With all of the Spades silently agreeing, they bowed respectfully to the Red Hairs.

"Thank you for everything," they all said.

Benn and his fellow crewmates all broke out into big grins.

"Why does it look like I'm watching the Spades pledge their loyalty to Benn and form a cult?"

Everyone turned to see Shanks walking up the deck towards them with an amused smile. They noticed Ace wasn't with the man to which Shanks must've noticed their confusion since he then said, "Ace was with me until some kids named Willow and Quinn got his attention. He said he'd be back later and walked off with them."

Lucky Roo gave a nod at that. "I know those kids. Well, I don't know them but I was with Ace when we saw them yesterday. They were following us and Ace decided to walk up and talk to them. I guess they're friends now."

Shanks chuckled before noticing Pakky's knee. He raised an eyebrow in concern and asked, "What happened to you? Ace and I were joking that you guys might get hurt messing around, but I didn't think you would!"

After a sheepish laugh from Yasopp, a tired explanation from Deuce, and an explanation from Benn saying how everyone was taking a break, Shanks face palmed.

"That's just wonderful. I'm sorry you got hurt, Pakky," Shanks said sincerely. But then he grinned brightly, wiping away any sincerity and looking so excited that everyone was tensing and staring at him warily. "But since you're all on break from training, I think this calls for a party!"

All the Spades and Red Hairs grinned along with him in excitement while Benn closed his eyes and rubbed a hand over his face. The gunslinger may enjoy the parties but then his captain and fellow crewmates always get rowdy, and Rockstar somehow always ends up hanging upside down from the flag. Even if they're partying on land.

"We can have it on the beach!" Shanks continued, oblivious to his First Mate's mental pain. Everyone cheered to that (besides Benn) and started talking excitedly with each other.

"While you all plan and whatnot, I'm going to find Ace and let him know. That way he doesn't have a heart attack when he sees his crew wild and acting like wackjobs," Deuce interrupted, standing up. He gave a wave goodbye to everyone and then began leaving the Red Force and headed towards the town.

The voices of his crew and the Red Hairs started to fade away as the distance between them grew until Deuce could no longer hear them. He had to admit that he was a bit excited for the party, but he began to stress out the more he thought about it. He knew his friends weren't idiots and wouldn't get heavily drunk and do stupid things, but he still worried. They could stumble into the ocean or trip and smack their heads on rocks!

Those thoughts ran through his head as he walked deeper in and around town. For a second Deuce considered using Observation Haki until he caught sight of the familiar orange hat Ace loved and wore.

Yet he didn't expect to see Ace comforting two twin kids - who he assumed were Willow and Quinn - with about five men lying behind him, and he saw them all sporting serious injuries.

"What happened here?" He asked, startling the three. Deuce could already piece some clues together but he had some blanks as to who these men were and why did they attack his captain. Once he was close enough he scanned his friend for any injuries and was satisfied to find none.

Ace's face tightened in anger at the reminder of the men but smoothed his features. He gave one reassuring smile to the twins before looking at Deuce.

"Well you know me, trouble has a way of finding me," Ace said, half joking and half serious.

Deuce gave him an unamused stare.

Ace sighed and relented. "Alright, well, it started like this…"

Flashback…

"And then, Nora had already bested Fin and got Gremma to do the macarena," Ace said, finishing his story.

Willow and Quinn started cracking up and laughing so hard that tears began to form. Ace couldn't help but laugh with them, enjoying the moment with the twins. He never told anybody but he absolutely adored children. It might have started with raising Luffy and watching some of the kids back home, along with meeting and caring for Tama, the sweet girl.

The moment was ruined though when Ace started to feel something was off, and discreetly searched their surroundings while they still sat at their table eating ice cream. Everything seemed fine until his gaze landed on a group of five men watching him towards his right. Ace knew immediately they were up to no good and tensed when he saw one of them had a huge knife. A nagging feeling had him wonder if these were the same men that attacked his crew when they slandered his name.

"Ace? You ok?" Willow asked, interrupting his thoughts.

Ace turned back to the twins and gave them a reassuring smile when they stared at him with both curiosity and concern, but not forgetting about the men. If those men tried to start something with the twins around… well, Ace wouldn't mind getting his hands bloody.

"Of course I'm ok, kiddo. But how about we get moving? I think we could go get some flowers for your mom if you want, get her a present. What do you think?" Ace asked, hoping to get up and out of there before the men could think of doing anything.

The twins gasped in delight and nodded, quickly getting up and throwing out their empty cups of ice cream. Ace got up as well and tossed his own cup out before making sure the twins were slightly in front of him. He was thankful the flower shop was towards the left instead of the right, so that they didn't have to pass those men. But once again that feeling of danger didn't go away. In fact it increased until Ace stopped abruptly and turned around, his eyes narrowed.

Sure enough the men were following him and tensed up as if they were preparing for a fight. Which they most likely were and Ace felt his blood begin to boil.

"Ace? What's going on?" Quinn asked nervously.

Ace half turned his head to see the twins holding hands and staring up at him with fear in their eyes. Their gaze flickered to the huge, muscular men then back to Ace. They almost reminded him of Luffy when they were kids and a shady man had approached his little brother. Ace had knocked the man out without hesitation and didn't let Luffy out of his sights for a month after that.

"Fire Fist Ace, just the man I wanted. Been looking for you," the leader snarled, interrupting before Ace could speak to Willow and Quinn. The leader had a thick neck nearly as wide as his waist and muscles so big that they were twice the size of his head. His thugs were also heavy with muscle and Ace noticed that instead of one man carrying a big knife there was another. They looked so big that they were nearly swords.

Ace kept his gaze on them but his words were directed to the two kids trembling behind him. "Willow, Quinn, I want you two to run and not look back. Understand me?"

"We can't leave you!" Quinn cried.

Ace was about to order them again to go leave and assure them that he would be fine, but the leader interrupted again saying mockingly, "It's a wonder how your crew listens to you when you can't get kids to. Do you need children to protect you, Fire Fist?"

Ace knew it was a bait to get him angry and didn't let himself fall for it. He wouldn't let his anger get the best of him. Shanks warned him and taught him to do better. He wasn't going to fail his mentor and lessons.

"Ace doesn't need us! He can fight anybody! And he's gonna wipe the floor with you idiots!" Willow yelled at them, anger briefly taking over her fear.

Obviously the men laughed and faked cooing noises. The leader smirked and said in a drawl, "Aw Fire Fist, your kids are quite adorable. I think I might want them and keep them as little cheerleaders for myself." His pathetic thugs chuckled darkly along with him.

Ace could feel his haki and fire swimming and stirring in burning anger, demanding to be used and unleash its power. To burn these- these foul men and make them regret everything. To regret messing with his crew, to regret messing with the twins, to regret messing with him. But he still managed self-control and held off his anger for now. Instead he chose to pull a Shanks and relax his pose, yet still showing he wasn't afraid to fight, and make his voice hold a slight mocking drawl while being serious.

"You scum bags done yet? You aren't taking the children and you're interrupting our time together, so how about you hurry up and spit out whatever you're just dying to say," Ace drawled. He crossed his arms over his chest and cocked his hip out to the side, as if he had a better place to be. Which he did.

The leader glared intensely at him and growled. "My name is Dent, and I got a bone to pick with you. These are my men Jon, Huro, Velven and Net. We're still a bit upset after what your crew did to us, especially your female pirate who knocked out one of my teeth-"

"And you want revenge? Got it, but can I ask you one thing? Do any of you have a handkerchief or a rag?" At their confusion and weirded out stares, Ace gave them an evil grin and said in a deadly voice, "I'm going to need something to wipe my hands with to get your blood off of them once I'm finished with you."

Ace was satisfied to see them tense and look a bit worried.

The leader, Dent, was the first to shake himself and focus back on Ace. "Very funny, but we'll be the ones walking away." The two thugs with knives, who were Hugo and Velven, pulled them out and the others readied their fists.

Ace uncrossed his arms and readied himself, but was stopped from charging at them by a hand tugging at his shirt. He half turned to his head to see it was Willow who grabbed him and was staring at him with so much fear. She swallowed nervously but said with a strong voice, "Ace, please don't get hurt. Kick their butts and make them sorry."

Ace blinked at her in surprise but grinned. "Of course, kiddo."

"Ugh, do you always need a girl to stick up for you and cheer you on?" Dent said with a disgusted tone.

Ace gave him a mocking laugh. "Be careful, Dent, it was a girl after all who knocked your tooth out and sent you lying on your back," he taunted.

With a growl and a cry of battle Dent and his men ran at Ace. They looked furious and any passersby were long gone, knowing from the beginning trouble was happening and wanting to stay far away from it. Which was smart and better for Ace to focus and not worry about any civilians getting hurt.

With a quick shout of, "Kids run!", Ace charged at the group of scum and met Hugo head on as the thug jumped in front of the others.

Ace activated his Armament Haki, covered his hand in it and grabbed the blade, stopping it from coming down on him. He punched Hugo once in the jaw and then kneed him in the ribs before throwing him at Net. Ace quickly ducked a punch from Jon, sprung back up and aimed a backward hammer fist at him. Sadly Jon dodged it just barely and suddenly Velven was coming at him.

Ace dropped down, quickly stuck his leg out and swept Velven off his feet. He bounced back up and aimed a hard kick - that was infused with haki - into the fallen man's ribs. Ace and the other men heard the sickening crack of bones breaking. Ace grinned.

Hugo was coming back at him along with Net, both deciding to work as a team. Net attacked first and tried to fake a left then throw a right but Ace caught on and let him think it was working. Until the last second Ace stepped to the side and aimed a powerful punch to his ribcage before aiming another to his sternum, effectively stunning Net and making him breathless.

For good measure Ace grabbed him by the neck and slammed him down onto the ground.

Hugo swung his knife as soon as Net was down and Ace ducked and rolled just in time to miss being cut in the face. He quickly got up and leaned backwards to once again avoid being cut as Hugo swung once more. Ace waited until the giant man swiped at him with his knife again and once he did, he grabbed the other's wrist and brought his other hand to grab his elbow and sharply pushed up. Hugo let out a cry of pain as his arm broke in half.

"ACE!"

Willow's scream nearly froze Ace but he turned around sharply, only to see Jon going after the twins. Pure, burning rage filled Ace. How dare these disgusting men go after children?! They were going to be so, so sorry.

Ace ran with all his might and once he was close enough he grabbed Jon by the back of his shirt, and yanked him backwards so harshly that he almost tripped over his feet and fell. This time Ace didn't bother with haki or his devil fruit. He put all his strength into his punch, positioned his legs just right, and aimed his fist right at Jon's pathetic face. It sent the man flying back and landing painfully onto the ground. Blood immediately started oozing from his nose and down his face.

Ace was so blinded with rage and focused on the twins that he almost didn't notice Hugo, Net and finally Dent charging at him. It was time to finally end this and get the twins out of here.

Ace ran at Hugo first. He jumped up, wrapped his arms around Hugo's neck and face before kicking Net in the face and flipping over, bringing Hugo down on the ground. Ace let go and stomped down on the thug's sternum, causing him to cough out blood and wrap his arms around his midsection, a poor attempt to defend himself. Ace looked back up and grabbed Net's fist in his hand before it made contact with his face.

Net widened his eyes in shock. Ace smirked before breaking his wrist then letting go to only kick him in the chest, sending him back and sprawling out on the ground. Dent actually hesitated before charging at Ace, although this time he had Armament Haki covering his right fist.

Ace wasn't even impressed and charged at him instead of letting his enemy do the honors.

Ace jumped up and roundhouse kicked Dent in the jaw. The leader went stumbling backwards and Ace used this to grab him by the back of the neck and bring him down to knee him in the face. After he let go and Dent went to clutch his nose, Ace finished him off by grabbing a fistful of his hair and punched him once, twice, and three times. Then he let go and kicked him down.

Ace looked around and when he saw the others not getting up he nodded to himself, satisfied. He quickly looked back to where he last saw Willow and Quinn and almost had a heart attack when he couldn't find them. Where were they? Ace made sure that that thug, Jon, didn't reach them.

Ace quickly stopped himself from freaking out and having a panic attack, focused on settling himself, and then opened his Observation Haki. A quick search showed him that they were hiding behind an overturned table and hugging each other. Ace deactivated his haki and rushed his way over to them, his heart still pounding with worry.

"Willow? Quinn? Are you guys ok?" He asked gently once he was close enough. As soon as Ace spoke he was immediately bombarded with two twins hugging the living daylights out of him. After half a second of surprise and shock, Ace returned the hug. They stayed like that a few moments, Ace just offering whatever comfort he could, until they finally pulled back.

They both widened their eyes at the fallen men. "You took them all out?" Quinn asked, stunned and in awe. He was looking at Ace with wide, bright eyes full of amazement.

Willow suddenly let out a laugh and grinned brightly at Ace. "I told you, Quinn! Ace is a powerful pirate, these chumps were nothing for him!"

That was the sweetest thing and Ace felt his heart melt. Of course he kept his expression cool and smiled right back. "See guys? I'm all right, but how about you? Any injuries?" he asked, concerned and worried.

When both twins shook their heads Ace let himself slightly relax.

"What happened here?"

Ace and the twins slightly jumped at the new voice and turned to see their visitor, who was Deuce.

End of Flashback…

By the end of Ace's explanation Deuce was filled with anger himself. He glanced at the fallen men and lifted his lip into a sneer.

"Wish I could've been here to beat some of them myself," he growled. He looked back at Ace, about to tell him why he searched for him, but quickly thought of something. Deuce grabbed his hands and brought them up for him to inspect. Sure enough Ace's hands were red, scratched up, and he had a semi long cut on his right knuckle that was bleeding a little.

Ace raised his eyebrows. "Oh, I guess I might have punched a little too hard," he said simply.

Deuce rolled his eyes and sighed. "Trouble does always find you," he said dryly.

Ace rolled his eyes and was about to say something until Willow shouted, "Hey Ace! You knocked out this guy's tooth!" Quinn was with his sister and they were both standing in front of Dent, but thankfully they were smart enough to stand far away enough that he couldn't get up - if he could- and grab them

Deuce sighed. "Seems that's where your cut came from, great. We need to clean your hands before they get infected," he informed.

Ace let out a groan and said, "That can wait till later. I need to get Willow and Quinn back home, I'm pretty sure their mother won't be happy that her children will be late home and might go searching for them. I do not want an angry mother on my trails."

"Actually Ace, can you explain to our mother what happened? If she hears it from us she'll never let us out of the house again!" Quinn cried. He and his sister both ran up to Ace and gave him puppy dog eyes, just like how Luffy would to try and get his way. And no, Ace was not going to fall for it.

"Alright, I'll tell her."

He fell for it.

Deuce laughed at him until moans of pain were heard. They all turned to see the group of thugs moaning and holding themselves in pain. Deuce looked at Ace who met his gaze. Both had a silent conversation and once it was finished Deuce let go of Ace's hands and stood in front of the twins, just in case something happened as Ace marched over to the fallen leader.

Ace grabbed a fistful of his hair again and yanked Dent's head to meet him at eye level. "You're going to get up, get your pathetic men, and get out of this town. I don't care if you have a ship or not, you'll be getting off of this island tonight. And if I find out you attacked anyone else again, I'll be hunting you down." Ace tightened his grip and yanked him up higher. "Got it?" he growled.

Dent nodded - to the best of his ability - and quickly got up once Ace let him go. He nearly fell over again but managed to stay on his feet and yell for his group to get up and move. Ace watched them with narrowed eyes and decided to use a bit of his Conqueror's Haki to intimidate and scare them even more. Once they felt it they all began to run as best and fast as possible, fearing Ace would attack again.

Once that was over Ace clapped his hands together and looked at his friend and the twins. "Well then, shall we get you two brave rascals back home?"

"Yeah!" the two twins cheered. Willow looked at Deuce and said, "By the way, we have a first aid kit you can use for Ace's hands if you want."

Deuce smiled kindly at her. "Thank you, and I would love to use it. I'll also make sure to replace what I'll use."

With that the four of them headed off to the twin's home. When they got there and Ace explained what happened, the mother hugged her children and checked them over for any wounds. Then she launched herself at Ace, hugging him so tightly that he nearly couldn't breathe.

Deuce was struggling not to laugh.

When Ace and Deuce were getting close to the ship the sun was setting. Ace stared at his friend in confusion when Deuce started to walk in the direction towards the beach. "Deuce, where are you going? Everyone's on the ships."

His First Mate frowned before realisation dawned on him. "I forgot to tell you, Shanks decided to throw a party on the beach. That's why I actually came to find you because I was going to warn you before you saw our crewmates acting wild." Deuce's frown deepened before continuing, "Oh and I guess I forgot to also tell you that Pakky sprained his knee during tag."

Ace widened his eyes and stared at Deuce in disbelief. "Seriously? How'd that even happen?" he asked bewildered. It was tag!

Deuce looked tired and exasperated as he explained, "Yasopp got too hyper and tackled Pakky. Also since I told Pakky to take it easy, Benn said we could all take the next few days to take a break from training. That's why Shanks wanted to throw a party."

Ace didn't say anything for a few moments and just stared at Deuce blankly. Finally he broke out of his trance and rubbed his forehead, feeling both impressed and slightly overwhelmed. "I can't believe how hectic this day has been."

Deuce placed his hand on his shoulder in comfort. "Trust me, I understand. And tonight I'll be keeping an eye out on the crew to make sure they don't do anything stupid… anything too stupid," he sighed.

Ace felt guilt stir in his stomach and he placed his own hand on Deuce's shoulder. "No, you're going to relax and enjoy the night. I'll keep an eye on the crew while you have fun for once," he argued. His best friend deserved more than this but it was the best Ace could offer at the moment. If he could wave his hand and make any trouble and worry go away from Deuce he would. But sadly magic doesn't exist. And Ace was sure that if it did it would blow up in his face.

When it looked like Deuce was about to argue, Ace chose to be childish and place his hand over his mouth, halting anything his First Mate was about to say. "No no, you're not arguing, Deuce. And if you try to, I'll just demand that as your Captain you'll take the night off and forget your duties. I'll even sit on you and have Nora pin your legs down if that's what it takes to get you to relax," he threatened.

Deuce rolled his eyes and peeled Ace's hand back once he finished. "Alright alright, no need to go to the extremes, Captain."

Ace gave a nod, feeling pleased. "Good. Now, let's go and see our lovely crew.

Once Ace and Deuce arrived on the beach and found the crews everyone greeted them with a smile. Then, to Ace's despair, they noticed his knuckles on both hands lightly bandaged. Every Spade rushed towards them and started rapid firing questions at him till his head spun.

"Ace, what happened?"

"How badly are you hurt?"

"Did someone hurt you, Captain?"

"If someone did I'll make them pay!"

Thankfully Shanks came to his and Deuce's rescue by saying loudly, "Dear children, let's not overwhelm your Captain and First Mate!" But once Shanks came forward and saw Ace's hands, his expression darkened and became thunderous. Everyone paled and took a step back.

"Did someone hurt you? Do you have any more injuries? How badly hurt are you?" he asked. Shanks was going to ask more questions until a large hand landed on his shoulder and pulled him back a bit. It was Benn, to Ace's relief. The gunslinger would rescue him and stop Shanks from being overwhelming and nearly making Ace pass out from the overload of questions.

Benn turned his attention to Ace and asked calmly, unlike everyone else, "Ace, what happened?"

With a glance at Deuce, who gave him silent support, he let out a long exhale and faced Benn again. Ace explained all about how he was with the twins, the men coming after him and how they were the ones who slandered his name a while ago, which caused some of his crew to defend him.

Benn briefly had some emotion cross over his face before schooling his expression and kept his face blank. "These men, you said you sent them running? To leave the island?" he asked.

Ace raised an eyebrow but nodded.

Benn twisted his lips into a disdainful look. "Shame, I could've had some fun. Anyway, go on and have fun with your crew. We'll make sure no one gets too wild." He gave Ace a smile before pulling Shanks with him, preventing the man from hunting those thugs down and giving them a piece of his mind. Before they were out of hearing range they heard Benn say to Shanks, "If I can't beat them then you can't either. You're suffering too."

Ace and the Spades blinked.

"That was… interesting," Nora said after a beat of silence.

Gremma scoffed. "That's an understatement."

Ace went to say something but suddenly they heard, "HEY CAPTAIN! I'LL FIGHT THOSE THUGS DESPITE BEING DOWN TO ONE LEG!"

Ace couldn't help but faintly chuckle at Pakky. "I appreciate the offer, but I think a dog would have a better chance than you!" he teased. Pakky let out a yell and all of the other Spades started laughing.

Ace chuckled and bumped Deuce with his shoulder and said, "I think tonight is gonna be filled with lots of fun."

Deuce raised an eyebrow with a smile growing on his lips. "Yeah? Let's just hope no one starts another game of juggling bottles on fire and we're good."

As the night went on and everyone laughed and joked around, Ace began to feel something was off again. Not like danger but like something was wrong, as if someone was upset. Ace looked up from where he was sitting with Lucky Roo, Fin, Tiny - the Spade's cook - and Nora. He saw Benn with Deuce, Gremma, and Pakky and it looked like he was telling them about an old adventure

The other Spades were either together or some with Red Hairs, having a good time and enjoying themselves. A second later Ace figured out why he was feeling this way. He couldn't find Shanks despite the party being his idea. Worry started to grip Ace tightly and he stood up, excusing himself from the group and stretching out his senses to find his mentor. Shanks wasn't near them and five minutes later after looking and trying to be quiet about it, Ace almost decided to get Benn.

But before he could decide if he wanted to, he finally spotted Shanks. The man was a long way away from the crews and was sitting on an overturned tree stump in the sand. He was hunched over and as Ace got closer and closer he could see a bottle of rum held loosely in his hands. Ace hesitated, now seriously wondering if he should get Benn.

He didn't know Shanks as well as Benn and if Ace expressed any concern it would probably be brushed aside, since he was his apprentice. Shanks wouldn't want to 'burden' Ace with his troubles and Benn would be the only one to knock sense into him and comfort him. It was hard to make a choice because he also didn't want Shanks to be embarrassed that he found him, sitting alone drinking, clearly having a breakdown or something heavily bothering him. But as soon as those thoughts came Ace pushed them away. No. He wouldn't leave Shanks alone to suffer and would stick by him.

Ace quickened his pace and sucked in a deep breath when he was just behind him. He knew Shanks knew he was here. When the elder wasn't making a sound and just took a drink from his bottle, Ace decided he'd be the one to break the silence first.

"Shanks, what's wrong?" he asked gently, but not too softly to sound like he was treating him like a child.

A sigh escaped from Shanks' mouth. He didn't say anything at first, just took another swig from his bottle before saying, "Nothing's wrong, Ace. Just thinking. Go back to everyone and have some fun."

It was Ace's turn to let out a sigh. He walked ahead and stopped right in front of Shanks, and what he saw in the man's eyes made him freeze. It was heavy, dark and horrible sadness that Ace recognized because everyday that same dark and horrible sadness. Seeing it in the man who he looked up to and cared for hurt. It hurt knowing that Shanks was filled with just as much sadness as he was happiness. That he felt this intense pain everyday just like Ace. Which he supposed was very naive of him to simply think that Shanks never felt intense sadness before. Well, he knew that Shanks got sad, he's helped him before with Benn.

But to think it would be this bad, and not give the thought that Shanks could feel it also, was stupid of him.

Ace took a step forward and knelt down in front of Shanks. He met the red hair's stare calmly and said, "I know that's a lie, and I'm not leaving you. Just like how you never leave me."

"Now that's a lie," Shanks scoffed, looking down at his feet and tightening his grip on his bottle.

Ace frowned. What on earth was Shanks saying? His confusion must've been so noticeable that Shanks seemed to have sensed it and looked back up. His eyes were guilt-ridden and his whole body language screamed guilt and pain. Ace could nearly feel it secondhand.

"Shanks, what's going on? Please tell me, I want to help… I care about you a lot, and seeing you in pain makes me upset." Ace felt bad for pushing Shanks but he couldn't leave him alone, not when he was clearly hurting badly. Shanks meant too much to him and he wasn't going to let him suffer. Ace reached out and placed his hand over Shanks' despite him holding the bottle. Yet slowly but surely, Shanks started to let go of it and let Ace take it away before taking his hand into his own.

"I… I have left you, Ace," Shanks began, his voice cracking. "I wasn't there for you, I left you alone when you needed me. I wasn't there when you asked about who your parents were, I wasn't there to tell you that they were great people, I wasn't there to be there for you."

Ace didn't say anything for a beat until, "Shanks, what exactly-"

"I'm saying that I left! That I left everybody! I left Roger when he told us to leave him instead of fighting back. I left Rayleigh when he walked away alone, I left Miss Rouge and didn't ask her if something was wrong the last time I saw her. I just believed her charming smile and her lie saying everything was alright. I- I left them which ended up leaving you alone." Shanks pulled his hand away and gripped his hair tightly.

Ace stared at Shanks, stunned. He didn't say anything or move, just watched the man crumble and break into pieces before him. It was two minutes later that Ace finally spoke.

"Shanks, how could you even think that?" he started, his voice a near whisper but making Shanks lift his head up to stare at him in confusion. "Roger made you all leave and even Rayleigh couldn't make him budge! What makes you think that you could've when you were his young apprentice, that he wanted to protect? What makes you think my mom would admit her troubles to a young boy that she saw as her own? And Rayleigh, he wouldn't have let you come either way! Because he would want you to fulfill your dreams and become a great pirate."

Shanks looked like he wanted to argue and say that he was a failure but Ace wouldn't let him. "Yes, Shanks, you weren't there for me. You weren't there for me because you didn't even know I existed," he continued, hoping he was getting through to his mentor. Yet it seemed like he wasn't so Ace decided to take a different route.

"I didn't have a great childhood or life. I fended for myself, got my first best friend who became my brother, got a little brother, but then my best friend died. I raised a kid while I was still a kid. I learned hard truths and had to figure everything out on my own about everything, including parenting because while I am and always will be Luffy's big brother, I also became a parent. Not to mention when I found out who my father was I questioned everything about myself that I still do to this day." Ace paused, feeling his emotions swell up and begin to choke him.

It didn't help that Shanks was staring at him with wide eyes filled with horror and pain. When the red head reached out to comfort him, Ace pushed his hand to the side carefully. Shanks wasn't going to comfort him, Ace was going to do that for him for once. So he took Shanks' hand and held it tightly.

"Shanks, I have been through a lot. But all that pain I just told you? I would go through it again if it meant getting to this moment, because then I get to be with you," Ace said softly, making Shanks' breath hitch. For someone to say they would go through so much pain and anguish just to be able to be with someone, was beyond heartwarming and touching.

"Ever since we met you've been there for me more than my own grandfather. And, if it weren't for you, Luffy would be dead. Which means I wouldn't have had my little brother and when Sabo's time would've come, I would have been all alone. I probably would have died from the heart ache," Ace felt his lips quirk up into a faint smile. "Even before we ever met you already saved my life. So don't ever tell me you were never there for me, because Shanks, you always have been."

The hug Shanks pulled him in was bone crushing but wonderful. It made Ace feel loved and appreciated, that he meant something and was important. He returned it full force.

"Ace… I don't know how to thank you," Shanks said, his voice slightly muffled from where his face was buried in Ace's shoulder.

"You don't have to. I did this because I care about you, Shanks, and I wanted to return the favor for once," Ace's own voice was muffled from where he buried his face into Shanks' shoulder. He also tightened his grip around Shanks, not quite ready to let go, and from how Shanks did the same he wasn't alone.

They stayed like that for what felt like forever until they finally let go. Ace noticed Shanks' eyes were slightly red but didn't say anything, and his eyes might also be a little red too.

"I think I might call Rayleigh. Just see how the old man is doing," Shanks said suddenly.

Ace tilted his head to the side and asked, "You don't keep in contact with each other?"

Shanks shook his head. "No we do, but not constantly. More like every couple of weeks or months. We've never talked about anything personal or deep but I think that should change, life goes by too fast and I don't want him to feel like he's alone. He's not technically, he has a wife, but still. I'm the only other one who would understand his pain or come close to it. Besides Buggy but that man is horrible at keeping in contact and talking," he explained.

Ace gave him a lopsided smile and said, "I'm glad you're thinking about reaching out to him. It's good to reach out to family."

Shanks raised his eyebrows before settling into a soft, nostalgic smile. "Yeah, the old man's family. Speaking of which, here's a fun fact for you, if things had worked out and life been kinder to us, Rayleigh would've been your godfather."

Ace's eyes widened in shock but before he questioned more about that, Shanks then said, "But since that never happened, he would be like your great uncle. Like really great as in old. He's all white hair and white beard now. Like a wizard."

Ace snapped out of his shock and looked at Shanks amusedly. "I think the alcohol made you a bit more talkative. How about we head back to the others and relax?" he suggested.

Shanks gave him a fake exasperated look and sighed. "Fine, if you wish," he 'relented'.

Ace shook his head before getting up and starting to walk. They stayed at a slow pace and took their time, not wanting to rush. But while they were walking Ace couldn't help but think about Rayleigh. After what Shanks just told him it made him curious about the old man, his father's closest friend. What was he like? And what about the few remaining members of the Roger Pirates? Would he ever get to meet them? Should he look for them? He'd have to think more about it later, when he was alone.

As they were getting closer they could hear the laughter from different crew members, and could practically feel the pure joy in the air. It felt nice and soothing, like there were no troubles and just bliss. The crew members all gave them smiles and mock salutes when they spotted them but other than that they left them alone.

They saw Benn standing by a small campfire alone, one that Ace had built, and made their way over until Nora and Fin were calling Ace's name. He was about to say no and stay by Shanks, but he felt a hand push him towards his crewmates' direction.

Ace stared at Shanks with refusal until the man pushed him again fondly. "Go see your nakama, Ace. I'm gonna see Benn, so go and have fun," he said, urging him.

Ace hesitated but finally left when Shanks pushed him one more time and was certain he went to Benn. With that the Captain of the Spades went to go see his two crewmates by the ocean, hoping trouble wouldn't happen. There had been enough of that for one day.

Shanks waited till Ace was far away enough before saying to Benn, "That kid sure is amazing."

His friend moved his gaze to him and lingered for a split second before turning back to the three Spades, humming in agreement. "Yeah, that kid sure is something."

Shanks frowned and stared at Benn in concern. "It seems like I'm not the only one with problems tonight. What's wrong, Benn?" he asked, not bothering to hide his concern. His best friend was quiet for a few seconds before letting out a heavy sigh and slumping his shoulders.

"I've been trying to push away all these thoughts, but tonight it seems I can't," he started. "When the Spades leave, or deny your offer of joining when you ask, it's gonna hurt." Benn crossed his arms over his chest and moved his gaze down to the dwindling fire below them. His expression was open and Shanks could see the emotions he was battling.

"Yasopp and Lucky Roo voiced their concerns to me earlier, and I told them that we're attached, simple as that. Those Spades, Shanks, are really something else," Benn sighed. He lifted his head and gave Shanks a bitter smile.

The red head stared at sadly. "I know, it's gonna suck. But," - Shanks lifted his hand, gesturing to the young Spades running around - "We still have hope that they'll stay. Though until the time comes and it seems right to offer joining, we'll make the most of what time we have with them."

Benn eventually met his gaze and after a minute of silence, he smiled wearily but yet happy. "Seems that kid of yours has knocked some wisdom in you," he joked.

Shanks rolled his eyes and bumped his shoulder against his playfully. "Please, my dear Benn, I have always been wise."

Benn chuckled but noticed his captain didn't pick up what he said exactly. He pretended to scratch his jaw to hide his growing grin. Lucky Roo owed him ten beli for being able to sneak in a father joke without Shanks noticing.

"Hey, what're you grinning at - ACE WHY ARE YOU IN THE WATER?!" Shanks screeched once he saw that his apprentice mid deep in the ocean, forgetting what he was going to ask Benn.

Ace seemed to hear Shanks but was surprisingly calm. Especially for someone who's biggest weakness is water. "Nora wants to play chicken in the water! Don't worry I know how deep I can go, I've tested it!" he assured.

Shanks was not assured. "Ace! You have a devil fruit!" he shouted, beginning to freak out and worry.

Ace waved off his worry and helped Nora climb onto his shoulders. "Don't worry, if I start drowning I got Nora to grab me! If you're also worried I might get cold I can easily set myself on fire," he 'reassured'. In front of him Gremma had another Spade, who was Rex, a fellow swordsman along with Nora, on his shoulders.

Shanks looked at Benn, his eyes pleading for help. "Benn, what the heck is he thinking?!"

His First Mate shrugged. "I have to admit I'm a little curious to watch this," he said, not sounding sorry at all. In fact he was enjoying seeing his captain fret like a mother hen.

Shanks face palmed. "I'm going to go grey early because of all this worry and stress," he groaned.

Benn narrowed his eyes at him. "Feel my pain."

Bonus…

Buggy watched his crew from where he sat, moving and walking around, talking and joking loudly with each other. He would have joined them but today was one of those days where he didn't want to do anything. Just sit around and sulk in silence. His crew seemed to have sensed his mood and left him alone thankfully.

Buggy tilted his head back and watched the clouds and birds go by. He wondered what it would be like to be able to drift away and not have a care in the world. It sounded peaceful.

"Hey look! It's the newspaper!"

Buggy brought his head back up at that. The news? That sounded good to read. After signalling for one of his crewmates to hand him the newspaper, he settled himself more comfortably and relaxed his muscles. He smoothed the newspaper out and began to read, getting ready to enjoy new information and stories.

Or he would have been if the front page wasn't talking about Shanks in bold words!

"That idiot?! What did he get into now?!" he shrieked. His crew startled at his voice but wisely didn't say anything or come near. When it came down to Shanks, his old crewmate, they avoided their captain as he could get loud talking about the red head.

Buggy read everything so fast that his eyes went crossed eyed for a second. But when he saw the picture of Shanks and that super rookie, Fire Fist Ace, he paused. He furrowed his brow and squinted carefully at the picture. Why did that kid look so familiar? Something about his eyes… and his freckles… the way his face was contorted with anger, similar to how Miss Rouge would yell at Roger for doing something reckless…

Buggy froze. His stomach dropped. Ice flooded his veins and a chill went through him.

It couldn't be… Fire Fist wasn't….

Buggy jumped from his seat and ran to his room, ignoring the shouts from his startled and confused crewmates. It couldn't be true! It wasn't possible!

But could it be?

Buggy hurriedly made sure he wasn't followed, made sure no one could listen in in any way, and dialed Shanks. His stomach was twisting and turning painfully and his mouth felt dry. Adrenaline and so many other emotions crashed and stirred within him. He almost felt sick.

After ages of waiting or what felt like it, Shanks finally picked up.

"Buggy! My dear Buggy! I'm so happy-"

"Fire Fist, is he Roger and Miss Rouge's son?" he spit out, not wanting to beat around the bush.

Shanks lingering silence and hesitation gave him his answer.

Buggy felt the floor sway beneath him and not because he was on a ship. He reached out a trembling hand and grabbed a chair he could collapse into, before he could fall on the ground. His hands didn't stop trembling no matter how hard he tried to stop it. He felt nauseous.

"Buggy, how did you find out?" Shanks' voice was deadly calm and hints of worry could be heard in it. No one else would have heard it but Buggy knew the red headed idiot better than anyone else. They did grow up together after all.

"The newspaper. It had a picture of you two on the front page and the way his expression was angry and the freckles, and the eyes, I started to see the resemblance until I figured it out," Buggy explained. He dropped his head into his free hand and groaned. "He's their son."

Shanks didn't say anything for a few moments until, "Yeah, he is. And he's so much like them but yet different. He's incredible."

Buggy let out a laugh that almost sounded like a sob. The pain and guilt he felt every day was piling up and suffocating him. Shanks didn't say anything or ask if he was ok, he noticed gratefully. He let Buggy pull himself together in silence and waited for him to say something next.

"Does he know who his parents are?" Buggy eventually asked. His voice sounded weak but clearer.

"Yes, but he doesn't know that I or Benn know. I don't even think his own crew knows, so besides you, me, and Benn no one else knows. Well, besides his grandfather," Shanks said.

Buggy frowned. "Roger's parents were long since dead when we were with him, which was the same case with Miss Rouge. Including any other family like cousins, so who's this grandfather?" he questioned slowly.

"Garp."

"What?!" Buggy shrieked.

Shanks sighed. "It's a long story."

Buggy huffed and leaned back in his chair. "I got all night and ain't doing anything tomorrow," he said.

"I'm only going to explain the situation, I'm not going to talk about his personal problems or his life story. That's for him to tell if he wants to."

Buggy wanted to smack Shanks. "I didn't want you to do that anyway, I know that's private and he doesn't even know me. If you did I'd punch you so hard that your ancestors would feel it," he growled. He grinned when he heard Shanks chuckling and tell him sorry.

But then he swallowed a tight lump in his throat and said a bit quietly, "But after… but after you explain this whole thing, could you tell me what he's like?"

Even though he couldn't see Shanks he knew the red head was smiling.

"Of course, Buggy."

Hope you all enjoyed the chapter! I tried my best to find any spelling errors or missing words. I also hope you're not bothered it's super long, I just get excited and write what I think works for the chapter. Should it be shorter?

Besides Shanks being devastated if Ace didn't join I wanted to show the other Red Hairs being upset too, showing their growing bond. I also wanted to show that Shanks still holds pain and guilt despite being a great mentor. That he still feels this pain and that it didn't go away magically, y'know?

I'll also try to work on the next chapter as soon as possible. With my mom out of work and home every day, my father and brother coming home earlier than usual and having my sisters screeching in my ear all the time, it's been… rough to focus, to say the least. My best alone time is usually late at night but I need sleep. (Despite having trouble sleeping all the time).

Let me know if you liked it and be safe!