Logan pushed the lever on the toaster down and turned back to the cappuccino machine. It may have been three years, but he remembered how much Veronica needed her caffeine in the morning. Although showing up out of the blue like this, first thing in the morning? Chances were good this wasn't her first coffee of the day, or even her first breakfast. It wouldn't be strange for her to be hungry even after an earlier meal; he remembered well how much food she could put away, and she was a pretty big fan of breakfast. Unfortunately, he really wasn't, so it was a minor miracle that he even had English muffins for her. He wasn't actually sure how long he'd had them if he was honest, but they weren't green and toasting made them hard anyway.

"Are you sure you don't need help?" The woman in question appeared in the door to his kitchen and he spun around to face her.

"Not really anything to help with," he responded. "When the toaster pops, I'm buttering the muffins. The coffee machine is doing its thing, and if you want anything more extravagant, we've gotta go out."

"No, no, I don't want to do that." Her mouth twisted and his gut reacted in kind. Of course she didn't want anyone to see them together and report back to Duncan. He couldn't blame her for that. He had no idea yet what she even wanted from him, but he was pretty sure that it didn't involve starting salacious rumors.

"So what are you guys doing in L.A.?" Logan asked. "You were just down this way last month for the reunion; it seems soon to be making another trip. I know you're not the biggest fan of Neptune." The toaster popped then and he moved back to butter the muffins.

"Umm." Veronica frowned and seemed to be searching for what to say. "We didn't come back to Neptune. I never need to go to Neptune again honestly. Since my dad moved up to Oregon, any ties that bind me there are completely dissolved. Thank God."

"I think Celeste might disagree," he said. "You can't think you can keep her baby boy away from her long term. She'll take a hit out on you."

Veronica laughed, and the hint of strangled hysteria he heard made him narrow his eyes. "You know, I think I've dodged that bullet."

He shook his head. "Don't trust that woman, Veronica. If she thinks that she can find a way to get rid of you, she will." Not for the first time he wished his mother would have been alive when he and Veronica were together. She would have loved her as a daughter-in-law, and maybe the difference in how she received Veronica as opposed to have Celeste did would have helped him make his case back in the day. He huffed in irritation. Need your mommy to land the woman you love for you. No wonder she picked Duncan.

"Thanks for worrying about me, but I think I'm okay."

Veronica moved to the cappuccino maker and frowned at the multitude of buttons and lights. "This thing seems unnecessarily complex." She gave him a sideways glance. "Can you make it give up its bounty? I'll finish with the English muffins."

"No need." He came up beside her and handed her a plate. "You take these, I'll deal with the caffeine, and we'll meet in the living room. Okay?"

"Excellent," she said with a smile, stretching up on her toes to kiss his cheek before taking the plate and pivoting away and out of the kitchen. He stood frozen for a moment, his cheek burning from the touch of her lips.

"What are you doing here, Veronica?" he mumbled under his breath as he finished with the coffees.

When he walked into the living room, a cup in each hand, she was sitting in the center of the sectional couch, cross-legged, looking around the room. When her eyes fell on him, she smiled. "I really like this room." She jerked her head toward a shelf of photographs. "I always loved that picture of you and your mom."

He handed her one of the cups, set the other on the coffee table, and moved over to the shelf, picking up the photo. He studied it for a moment, then put it down and came back to the couch, dropping on the cushion beside her. "We were at—:"

"I remember where you were," Veronica interrupted. "DId you think I would forget?"

He didn't answer as he stared at her like he'd been looking at the photo a moment earlier. She must have thought he didn't believe her, because she began, "You were eight and she was doing a play in New York. You lived with her for the six weeks of—"

"Why are you here, Veronica?"

As many times as he'd played this scenario out in his head, Veronica at his door out of the blue, it had never gone like this. He'd imagined her leaping into his arms and them fucking like bunnies. He'd imagined himself ordering her to leave and not come back. He'd imagined her begging him to give her another chance. Sometimes he imagined all of those things happening in the same encounter. He'd never imagined her just coming in and starting to chat.

"Well, I was in town, and wanted to see you." She sipped her coffee. "At the reunion, you asked if I thought about us anymore, so I thought it sounded like you'd be willing to see me. At the door, I asked if there was a chance you'd let me in—"

"And I said every chance in the world, yes, I remember. But you've been here for twenty minutes and I'm starting to wonder if I made a mistake." He moved the empty plate from the cushion next to her, placing it next to his untouched coffee. "Have you come to take a lovah, Veronica?" he asked in his best Southern drawl.

"Not exactly." He could practically see her brain working as she stared at him, then she seemed to come to a conclusion. "I think you're right, I shouldn't have come here like this." She stretched her legs back to the floor and started to rise, but he pushed her back.

"Why don't you let me decide that?" he suggested. "Who knows? Maybe I'll be into this, whatever this is. Duncan was my friend once, so I'm not sure I'm able to help you cheat on him, but I'm notoriously weak where you're concerned, so I'm not sure I won't."

"It's not going to come to that, Logan, don't worry." She reached for his hand. "I'm sorry that I didn't believe in us three years ago. That was the biggest mistake of my life and I'm sorry. Whatever else happens, I really want you to know that."

He scooted closer, then turned her hand up, tracing the lines of her palm. "So not believing in us was your biggest mistake. Where does marrying Duncan fall in your hierarchy of poor choices?"

She chuckled and shook her head. "Well, they're tied together pretty tightly, both those actions. I'm not sure they can be viewed separately."

"I don't know about that. Saying no to me didn't default to yes to him. You could have dumped us both."

"I do see what you're saying, but back then, it didn't feel like that." She looked away from him, staring out the window. "Looking at them separately... I don't know if one is worse than the other. It feels like they're just one giant fuck-up. There've obviously been plenty of bad choices to go around in my life, but that whole thing, dumping you and marrying Duncan...that really does surpass everything else."

Logan nodded thoughtfully. "I think you may have forgotten about those NSYNC jeans in eighth grade."

Veronica's gaze shot back to him, mouth open in surprise, then she burst into laughter, pulling her hand free of his to smack him in the chest. "You were just jealous they didn't make them for boys."

"Hey, if I was going to wear jeans with JT on them, do you really think I'd care about how they were cut?"

They both laughed uproariously, and Logan used the break in intensity to grab his coffee and push into the corner of the couch away from Veronica. He needed more information about what was going on with her before he threw caution to the wind and pulled his heart out of his chest and tried to hand it to her again, so distance seemed like his friend.

"Okay, I think we're agreed that not everyone views their, or other's, mistakes the same," she said with a smirk. "And it doesn't matter anyway. The important thing is that I need you to know how sorry I am that I hurt you."

"Umm, thanks." He held the cup up to his mouth, peering down into it and breathing in the steam so he didn't have to keep eye contact. "So is that why you're here? Apologizing for preferring Duncan? You could have texted that."

"Logan." Her voice sounded chiding. "You think I preferred Duncan?

His head jerked up and he glared at her, disbelieving. "Are you fucking serious right now? As you so eloquently put it a minute ago, you dumped me and married him. And now you're trying to tell me you didn't actually prefer him?" He jumped up, slamming his cup on the table. "You know what? We're done here."

"No, no, no, no, no, Logan, please." Veronica was beside him in an instant, her hands grasping for his arms, but he tugged free, hands flailing to keep her off him. She took a step back, holding her hands up in a placating gesture, her face almost agonized. "I'm sorry, that was an irresponsible thing to say. Please forgive me for that. I am so sorry. Please, can we sit again? I want us to talk this through." She took another step back, hands still outstretched. "Please, Logan, Please let me stay. Please talk to me. I'm so sorry."

"Do not pull that bullshit on me, Veronica. I love you, but I'm not going to let you pretend that you didn't choose Duncan instead of me." He spun away, unable to watch her looking so sad in response to his words. Yes, everything he was saying was a hundred percent true, but it tore at his insides to see the pain on her face.

"Do you still? Love me?"

"Oh, Jesus." He threw his hands up, then braced them against a wall to keep himself from collapsing. "Just stop."

"No, I just want to know. Do you still love me?" She was suddenly pressed against his back, hands on his arms again, head resting between his shoulder blades. "Tell me the truth."

"I have never told you anything else." He spun back to face her. "I told you back then that I loved you and it wasn't enough. Why does it matter now? Decided you can fit us both into your life? Respectable marriage with the PC guy and tawdry affair with the not-quite-so-appropriate one?"

She took a step back at his aggression, and Logan followed, crowding her back against the couch. "Is that what you came here for, Veronica? Need a good fuck and you figured it was easier with me instead of having to break in someone new?"

She had curled into herself, arms crossed protectively over her chest (over her heart), and her face was anguished as he railed at her, but at his last statement, she straightened her shoulders again and her face hardened.

"You were never a tawdry affair, Logan. Ever. I loved you too, but I was afraid of how that felt. After everything with my parents, I thought I needed stability, you know? Something steady and normal. I felt too much with you to trust that it could last."

Logan slumped onto the couch, suddenly exhausted. He still had no idea what she wanted from him and he was afraid of what he was going to agree to. He'd already known he would do pretty much anything she suggested; he knew that when he began to plead with her as they danced at the reunion. Now though, especially after hearing her say she loved him, something he'd never heard her say directly, he could relate to her saying she'd been afraid of how she'd felt about him, because right now, he was terrified at the thought of how much of himself he would sacrifice for even a small piece of her.

"Logan?" Her voice was hesitant and he shook his head.

"I don't want to fight with you, Veronica. Why don't you just tell me why you're here." She started to sit beside him, but he waved her off. "No, I think I'm better off with you over there." She rolled her eyes but dropped back into the corner of the couch and pulled her legs under her. "Okay, so again, what are you doing here?"

She peered at his face, brows furrowed into a worried 'V', the edges of her mouth pulled down. "It's just...I've been thinking about you...for a while, since the reunion...and before." She practically whispered the last two words. "There was...something happened...and I realized..." She stopped abruptly.

"What happened?"

She shook her head. "It doesn't matter. I don't want you thinking that it's what got me thinking about us again. It makes this sound like a rebound thing."

Logan huffed out a long sigh. "So Duncan showed himself to be unworthy, and you're here to pick something up with me, and you don't want it to sound like a rebound thing." He chuckled. "News flash, sweet cheeks. This is the definition of rebound."

She nodded. "Yeah, I see how it would look like that." Veronica stood, grabbing her bag off the floor next to her. Logan started to struggle up but she moved next to him and put her hand on his shoulder, then leaned down to kiss the top of his head. "Don't get up; I can find the door."

"Veronica, no, don't leave. If rebound's what you've got, I'll take it. Or if tawdry affair's what you've got to give, I'll take that. Whatever you're offering, I want it." He wrapped his arm around her hips, pulling her to him. "Please," he whispered and her bag thumped to the floor again as she hugged his head against her torso, pressing her lips to the top of his head.

"No, rebound's not what I've got, and not a tawdry affair either. But I don't want you or anyone else thinking that's all you are." Her words were muffled against his hair and he tugged her more tightly against him, afraid to let go. "I think I probably shouldn't have come here, not until I'm settled enough to come to you without the baggage of my bad choices. But at least you know, right? If I kept quiet, who knows, maybe you'd find the love of your life while I'm straightening out my shit."

"I found her a while ago, Veronica. And I want her now." He wrapped his other arm around her and rested his forehead on the swell of her breast. "Stay with me."

"I can't." She edged back and tucked her fingers under his chin, tipping his head back to look up at her. "You're not my rebound, but I need to make sure that's clear. So I'm going to go." She wriggled free of his grasp and took a step away. "I think I've got some stuff to do before I can just come back and push my way into your life."

"You don't have to prove anything to me, Veronica." He stood and grabbed for her hand. "You don't. I just want you."

"And you can have me. But not today." She stretched up and kissed his cheek. "I think I'm going to Europe in a couple of days. My writing partner and I fell into an opportunity for a story and I'm going to tell her that I'll go. Gives Duncan some time to finalize the divorce—"

"What?"

"—and when I'm back, maybe we can have dinner. Would that be okay?"

"Divorce?" He caught her free hand in his. "Duncan's divorcing you?"

"Well, yeah, I mean, yeah, but I told him to. And I told him he was the one who had to establish the residency in Guam, or the Dominican Republic, or wherever he jetted off to yesterday; I'm not even sure. All I cared about was that he went." She smiled up at him. "So Duncan becomes a resident of somewhere tropical, I get to spend a month touring Europe, and you get to figure out if I'm worth upending your life over."

"You are. I already know that." He shuffled closer to her, both hands now clutching hers.

"I'm glad you think so, but while I'm gone, really make sure that's the best answer for you. You've made a good life for yourself. You need to be sure there's a place for me. If there's not..." Her gaze shifted away from his and her lips pursed.

"There is," he insisted, "there absolutely is. There's always been a hole in my life without you." He leaned in, pressing his forehead to hers and her eyes moved back to lock on hers. "Please don't go."

"I have to." She shook free and took a full step back, but never looked away. "I need to show everyone, including myself, that I can be something on my own. And beyond that, I don't want anyone thinking I only picked you because I couldn't have Duncan anymore. I want them all to know that you're who I want...who I love."

Logan crossed the short distance between them in an instant, his hands cupping her face as he bent to kiss her fiercely. To his surprise, she threw herself into the kiss as well, clutching his neck as she kissed him back. He spun them back toward the couch, collapsing onto it with her straddling his lap, running his fingers into her hair, then down her back, before stroking up her spine under her shirt. She broke free of the kiss then, laughing, and he began to kiss down her neck, stopping to suck gently on her collar bone. She gasped, then laughed again, and moved her hands to his chest, pushing up and away from him.

"No, no, Logan, stop."

He released her immediately, hands held up in surrender, as she rose to her feet. "I'm so sorry, Veronica. I didn't mean—"

"No, don't apologize. It was fine." She blushed, the pink making her already flushed cheeks rosy. Her shoulders rose and fell rapidly with her breathing as she tugged at her clothes. "More than fine actually. I wanted that too. You don't even know how much."

"Then why did we stop?" he asked, reaching for her again.

"Remember that part about waiting?" She poked his hand away. "That's why we stopped."

"But, Veronica," he whined, and because he wasn't above a little guilt if necessary, he squirmed and pulled at his pants legs, making a show of readjusting himself. When all she did was laugh again, he huffed and made a show of glaring up at her.

"Gotta go," she sang out, pivoting quickly, grabbing for her bag again. "I've gotta get in touch with Mindy and tell her the trip's a go. I think we'll probably fly out in the next couple of days, and be gone for maybe a month. Something like that. When we're back, if it's okay with you—" She stopped and looked at him again, her cheeks flushing once more. "—maybe we can do dinner? Talk about...us? If you're still interested at least."

"Are you serious?" He stood up and shook his head at her. "If I'm still interested?"

"Well, I mean, I hope..."

"I'll still be interested, Veronica," he said, eyes rolling. "We could have been a hundred years old before you came back, and I would still have been interested."

"That seems a little extreme."

"A hundred, Veronica. Trust me." He moved close to her again and cupped her cheek. "So, can we talk while you're off bugging Europeans? Text?"

She leaned into his palm. "I think that would be okay. But no jetting after me. I'm going to get out of here without losing my clothes, but if you catch up with me in some romantic European destination, I'm afraid all of my resolve might go away."

He grinned. "Is that somehow supposed to discourage me?"

"Do what I say, Logan."

"Okay." He kissed the top of her head. "But you better answer my calls. Or else I might just show up in Paris to track you down."

"I'll answer." She wrapped her arms around his waist, hugging him tightly, her cheek against his chest. "Promise."

"And will you tell me why the sudden divorce? Not that I'm opposed, but I feel like there's some stuff to talk over." He felt her nod against him and then she pushed free again.

"This'll be good. That way we can talk without a bunch of interruptions." Veronica smiled at him and turned for the door.

"Who's going to interrupt us?"

She choked out a laugh, shaking her head as she continued to walk away. "Umm, mostly? You."

"Are you saying I'm a distraction?" he teased as he followed.

"No, I most definitely am not," she replied, smirking over her shoulder at him. "Your ego does not need the boost." She opened the door and stepped outside, turning back to face him. "Thanks for letting me in today, Logan."

He leaned against the doorjamb, smiling as he watched her. "Eh, I guess." Her mouth fell open in surprise and he laughed. "No changing your mind, Sugarpuss. I expect to hear from you, and soon."

"Oh!" She pulled her phone out of her pocket, poking at it with one finger. "Do you have a new phone number?"

Logan shook his head. "Nope. Same one that's in your phone right now."

"You seem pretty confident that I still have it," she said, her eyes sparking at him.

"I am. So call me right now so I have your new number." She chuckled and he raised his eyebrows. "Same number?" She nodded. "Okay, then." He pushed upright and moved toward her, catching her hand and giving her one final kiss. "Come back to me."

"Always."