CHAPTER NINETEEN

Judy was looking through her channels as she heard a soft knock at the door. Her ears twitched and she got up. As she opened the door, she was a little startled to see Silver holding a bouquet of flowers. She blinked a few times before she locked eyes with the tall rabbit.

"These are for you, officer." he said politely as he offered her the flowers. Judy gulped loudly, feeling a little uncomfortable. His gesture was kind, but somehow weird. She took the flowers and forced a small smile.

"Oh hey, thanks. How thoughtful."

"Where would you like me to take you?" he asked. His blue eyes gave away how nervous he was, which confused Judy.

"To be honest, I would like to stay at home. I am sorry, I can see you've cleaned up nicely, but maybe we could just sit and talk, if you don't mind." she said timidly. Silver tilted his head slightly, but gave in with a nod.

"Sure."

Judy invited him in and placed the flowers in a nice vase on her nightstand. Silver looked around her tiny apartment, before he placed himself on her bed. He looked at all her stuffed toys with an arched eyebrow.

"Do you fancy something to drink?" Judy offered politely, still adjusting the flowers. Silver politely declined her offer as he examined some of her toys.

Judy sat down beside him and crossed her legs underneath her, her body turned to Silver.

"Soooo..." she said, her voice trailing off. This was already getting awkward. Silver turned to look at her and offered a timid smile.

"Well, how was your day?" he asked.

"Oh, cut the crap." Judy blurted out, her eyes widening at her own words. Silver was taken aback for a moment, but shook it off with a chuckle.

"Officer, never knew you had such a rough side."

"I am sorry, I didn't mean it. I just want to know why you wanted to see me." she apologized, her ears drooping mildly.

"I have no ulterior motives, if that's what you're implying." Silver said, raising his paws in defense. This caused Judy to stifle a snicker.

"That's not what I meant, dummy."

"I just wanted to talk."

"About what?"

"Whatever you please." Silver replied with a shrug.

"Look, Silver. I know something's bothering you, so stop beating around the bush."

Silver's posture became a little submissive as he drooped his ears and stared to the floor. "Well, seems like you're a real officer after all, you caught me." he said with a timid chuckle, his eyes darting towards Judy again. "I came here to apologize once more, hence the flowers. I want you to know that I truly didn't know about the attack, I did not set it up, since I didn't even know that your partner wanted to talk to me. I started some really huge fights with some of my fellow bunnies, I was insanely mad at them. I even considered to have some of them leave the pack, but without me they'd be doomed. I don't want them to end up on the streets, you feel me?"

"I do believe you, Silver. However, it still is your fault all of this happened. If it weren't for your disdain against foxes, they wouldn't have done that. You brainwashed them over years, they weren't thinking straight anymore, they were just following your commands. That is beyond wrong and I actually find your way of thinking disturbing. Foxes are mammals like everyone else, they belong to the predator family, but so do lions, bears, tigers, even raccoons or otters. I have also met bunnies who have been rude or just idiotic, but that still doesn't mean that all bunnies are the same. A fox harmed you, scarred you, took away someone important from you - which is dreadful - but there are other foxes. Just look at Nick, he is a fox with an attitude, I'll admit, but he's still willing to make this world a better place, fight for justice and for freedom. You gotta respect that."

"Lesson learned." Silver said with a proud grin. He was faking it, he hadn't learned anything. His despise against foxes was still the same, but somehow the grey rabbit infront of him had a valid point. Her belief in her partner was admirable, he had to be special, even though he just looked like Tank, who was most likely the most hated mammal for Silver.

"No, you haven't." Judy stated, crossing her arms.

"I am trying, I really am." Silver admitted with a sigh. "It's hard, you know? Every time I look into the eyes of a fox, I see Tank. I see how he tricked me in becoming his friend and how I actually trusted him, 'cause I was a dumb teen. He was the cool guy, the fly guy, the guy everyone adored and looked up to and it was me who had the honor of becoming his friend, I was actually proud." his voice trailed off and he closed his eyes. "It surely was a little suspicious that he wanted to know that much about my family's background, but I wasn't aware that he could be a threat. Just imagine my mother would've been home - what would they've done to her? They were three, we were three. Don't think I don't know how they calculated everything. My father was for one, my mother for the other one and I was meant for Tank. He was vicious, but somehow he couldn't kill me, which I somehow appreciate, but he still ruined my life, dragged me into deep depression, substance abuse and more. I was a wreck and my youth was everything but easy. I started dealing drugs at 16, because I needed money and well, I ended up taking them, because I lacked sleep and just wanted to die. I felt so ugly, so miserable. I still do, but I stopped taking drugs a few years ago, because they ruined me even further. I have a lot of suicidal thoughts and let's be honest - I owe this agony to a fox, so what do you expect?"

Judy was shaken by his speech. She knew that Silver was hurting, but she didn't know it was that bad. She drooped her ears as she surveyed his expression. It was sorrowful and hurt. He clenched his paws into fists and gritted his teeth as he stared out of her window.

"I just want to go to heaven and see my father. I want to apologize. It was my stupidity that got him killed. Without me befriending a fox, he could still be alive. He had to suffer such a painful and slow death, he was defenseless and scared. And my mom? She couldn't handle it. She loved my father so damn much, she couldn't picture a life without him, so she hung herself shortly after his funeral. It was me who found her corpse dangling from the ceiling in her room. I can't shake that image. I lost both parents in the most tragic way within two weeks... and it was all because I befriended a fox."

Judy's eyes became watery, she felt so much compassion for the white rabbit. He seemed so tough and intimidating, when in reality he was falling apart. She rested one paw on his shoulder, trying to keep herself from crying. His story was just so touching.

"Silver." she said in a shaky voice. "I am so sorry, I don't even know what to say. Whenever you need a friend, I am here."

Silver turned to look at her, her touch soothed him slightly. He sighed as he tried to crack a sad smile. He nodded to acknowledge her offer.

"Thank you." he said, his voice just above a whisper. "This is the reason it's so hard to work with your partner. It's nothing personal, but especially officer Wilde awakes my darkest memories."

"Because he looks like... him."

"Exactly."

A moment of silence between the two mammals passed. Judy removed her paw slowly and used it to wipe away a tear.

"It's not your fault, Silver. You did nothing wrong. You were a teenager happy to be friends with a popular guy, that's a common thing. I am sure your father ain't mad at you, I am sure he was upset that you were drowning your sadness with alcohol and drugs. As for your mother, I understand her agony, I really do, but she shouldn't have left you all alone in this world, you were only 13 and not able to take care of yourself. And the final thing is that you're not ugly at all. You're still one handsome fella, those scars tell a story and I am glad you told me." she said, flashing him a sweet smile.

"Thank you for your kindness. You are actually the first rabbit I've ever told this story in detail, yet you're the first who isn't trying to talk me into hunting Tank down and slay him. It's odd." he admitted, biting his lower lip.

"Silver, I'm a cop."

"Yeah, right."

"Did you know that Trisha is Tank's sister?" Judy asked. Silver frowned in surprise.

"She is? That's why they look so similar."

"So you weren't aware that Felix was dating your foe's sister? Please be honest."

"Are you suspecting me or something?" Silver asked, crossing his arms with a cocked eyebrow. Judy vigorously shook her head.

"No, no, no. I just want to make sure."

"I had no knowledge."

"Did you ever tell Felix about your background story?"

"I did."

"Did you mention Tank's name?"

"I did."

"Holy crap." Judy breathed, her eyes widened. This puzzle was slowly making sense. "What if Trisha found out the truth about her brother and maybe threatened him to go the police and Tank saw no other way than to...-"

"Makes sense." Silver said bluntly, shrugging.

"Oh no.. I need to find them! Do you have any idea where Tank lives now?"

"If I knew, Hopps..." Silver said, his voice trailing off. Judy got the hint and nodded.

"You're right, I suppose."

"So, now I want to talk about you." Silver said, changing the subject. Judy twitched her ears in confusion as she locked eyes with Silver.

"What do you mean?" she asked a little confused.

"I may be ugly, but I am not dumb. What is this thing between you and your partner? Even a blind mammal can see the sparks between you two." he stated, his tone rather earnest. Judy felt her ears getting hot as they pinked, so she drooped them to hide it. She chuckled awkwardly.

"I don't know what you're implying."

"C'mon, cut the crap."

"What are you even talking about?" Judy asked, a slight annoyance heard in her voice, which made Silver chuckle delightfully.

"You've got the hots for him, don't you?"

Judy's eyes widened and she turned her gaze towards the floor. She took a deep breath before looking at Silver again. She felt comfortable around him and tried to push the thought that he despised foxes away for a moment.

"He's rejecting me." she admitted with a long sigh. Silver arched an eyebrow, his facial features becoming soft.

"He's stupid."

"It seems like he can't make up his mind, maybe he's scared of prejudices."

"Probably. Could be that he needs some space to think it all through. A relationship between a fox and a bunny can be pretty complicated. I would know, Felix told me a lot."

"What do you mean?" Judy asked, a little confused. It was embarrassing to talk about this, but somehow Silver seemed very understanding.

"Well, foxes and bunnies are very different. Simply the height difference can lead to complications. The differently shaped snouts, the different mating habits, the different eating habits, everything. He is probably scared of hurting you, so he's pushing you away, for your own safety." Silver declared, offering a reassuring smile, which Judy returned.

"Still, he could at least tell me what's bothering him instead of being so rude, causing pointless fights."

"Maybe he's immature and finds no other way. Breaking down a wall and letting someone in isn't something everyone can do. Maybe he struggles."

"We are still friends and I can't help him to overcome his struggle if he refuses to talk to me about it." Judy said sulkily with a sigh.

"He has trust issues. I dislike the guy, but if you feel something for him, you need to make the first step. Seems like you're more of a rational thinker than he is. He needs your help. Perhaps he ain't even sure what he's feeling for you and still needs some time to figure it out. Give him some space, he'll come around." Silver said reassuringly, his eyes never leaving hers.

"Feels weird to talk to you about this, honestly. How come you're so understanding?"

"I like you, that's why. You've been listening to my problems, so it's my honor to return the favor, no matter what I think of it." Silver stated matter-of-factly.

"I just hope he ain't pushing me away because of that incident the other night... perhaps he's afraid of rabbits now."

"Nonsense. He knows you well enough and you were willing to sacrifice your life for him, Judy. How could he ever change his view on you? I dislike foxes, but I still know that they're very sly."

"He is so... ugh. One day all affectionate, the other day he rejects me."

"He can't admit that it hurts him. It hurts him that he is weak. You got to his weakest point - his heart, even though he swore himself to never let anyone in. It hurts. I know what I am talking about." Silver declared, his eyes showing some sorrow. He was referring to his own feelings towards the grey rabbit, which he had to hide under his mask. It wasn't exactly love, but he felt very drawn to her, so he assumed that Nick felt the same way.

Judy needed a moment to proceed Silver's words, rubbing her chin in a thoughtful way. "Do you really think so?"

"I know so."

"How come you're trying to help me instead of talking me out of it?"

"It isn't my place to ruin your fantasies or desires. I did that mistake with Felix and now he's missing. I've learned my lesson."

"You have my deepest appreciation, Silver." Judy said softly, offering him a kind smile.

"It's nothing."

"It is. I couldn't talk about this to anyone, it feels so good to finally have someone listen to me. I know my drama is pointless compared to yours, but I still enjoy it. Thank you."

"Love is never pointless." Silver said with a shrug.

Judy wasn't aware that she was putting Silver through hell with her words. He just wished he could find someone like her, but her heart seemed to be taken, so his chances were very little. Only because he genuinely liked her, he didn't dare to destroy her luck. Being so understanding was hard for him, but if it made Judy happy, it was okay, he would endure it.

"At first I thought you're very scary, but it seems like you're very kind, just hiding under a nasty disguise." Judy pointed out with a smile.

"Oh, I have a nasty soul, believe me. You just managed to get me to show my chocolate side."

Judy had to giggle at his statement. Her sweet giggle made Silver smile.

"I like this side of you."

"Thank you. Anyhow, I don't want to bother you, it's pretty late. I should get going, if you ever need anything, just call me." he said as he stood up.

"Thank you so much." Judy chirped as she jumped up to hug him tightly. Silver was a little startled by her affection, but soon decided to hug her back. Having her in his arms felt oddly satisfying, but he tried to push his thoughts away. She released him and flashed him a large smile.

"I think I now know how to handle the situation. I might as well talk to him right now." she said happily. It felt like a punch in Silver's stomach, but he kept a straight face.

"You do that. Good luck and good night." he said bluntly before he left.

Judy was really happy that she seemingly found a friend in Silver. She thought about his words once more and they made sense to her. She ran into her bathroom to get ready, she wanted to talk to Nick - tonight.

And nothing was going to stop her.

If only she knew.

Silver arrived at his warren with droopy ears. He went into his room and slammed the door shut behind him. He turned on his radio, listening to some depressing instrumental tunes. He sank into his chair and cupped his face in his paws. It was so damn hard to keep his composure around the joyful grey bunny. She was so positive, always seeing the good in mammals, just the opposite of him. Perhaps it was the reason he felt so attracted to her. He was so lost in thoughts that he didn't hear his door open.

"Boss?" Danny asked, approaching Silver slowly. Silver looked up, his eyes red from suppressing tears.

"What?" Silver grumbled, avoiding eye contact.

"Are you okay? You look exhausted."

"I am."

"I've heard you went on a date with the rabbit officer." Danny pointed out, his expression rather worried.

"Who told you?" Silver asked in an edgy tone, glaring at Danny.

"Words travel fast, Boss." Danny stated with a shrug. "How did it go?"

"Just fine." Silver said bluntly.

"No, it didn't. What happened? What's up with the music?"

"Just leave me alone." Silver breathed.

"So, you obviously do like her after all, huh?" Danny asked, his ears drooping. He had never seen his boss so upset about something before.

"She's perfect." Silver whined as he slammed his head on the wooden table infront of him.

"Then what's the matter? You two suit very well." Danny pointed out, tilting his head.

"She's in love with a fox, it's hopeless." Silver said, his words muffled as his head was still on the table.

Danny's eyes widened and he drooped his ears even further. This was possibly the most horrible thing that could happen to Silver.

"I am so sorry, Boss." was all he managed to say.

Chapter 19 for you guys, I hurried to write a new chapter, hope you like it.

Do you feel sorry for Silver? I surely do - a lot actually. T_T

He's been so understanding, even though it hurts him. That can only mean that he really likes her from the bottom of his heart.

Maybe he isn't such a bad guy after all, what do you think?

Let me know in the reviews! xoxo