Artemis withheld the urge to sneer at her new colleagues as they stared at her unabashedly. She had just arrived to Hogwarts, right on time for dinner at the Great Hall, and already she was irritated by the rest of the Wizarding population.

"Ignore them," Severus whispered, "They are just unused to seeing me with a beautiful woman."

Filius Flitwick stuttered, "M-my apologies dear. We were just blindsided with the news of a new colleague."

Artemis raised a brow, "There is nothing to apologize for. I myself would be curious about a new peer."

Minerva's eyes widened, taking particular note of her accent, "You're Irish? I must say, I do not recognize you, so you can't be a Hogwarts student. Did you go to a foreign school for your primary education?"

"Nothing of the sort," Artemis admitted as she took a sip of pumpkin juice, "I was home schooled."

"Home schooled, how peculiar," Minerva muttered, "It's an unseen practice in the Wizarding World. Most families here in the British Isles see it as a right of passage to attend Hogwarts."

Artemis waved away her concerns, "I'm a- what do they call it again Severus?"

"Muggleborn," Snape answered, well-aware that Lady Fowl did not forget the term, she was a genius after all, but merely asked for show. The young woman did love her dramatics.

"Ah yes," Artemis nodded in faux realization, "I am a muggleborn. Since my family knows nothing about magic, and my own did not make an appearance until I was 15, I did not find it prudent to attend a magical school."

This time the entirety of the table was shocked. The beautiful woman, a friend of the Head of Slytherin Severus Snape, was a muggleborn.

Umbridge sneered, "So Professor Snape, you thought it was a good idea to hire a muggleborn who has never had any formal schooling as an assistant? Truly there are better options."

"There are no better options," Snape calmly replied, "Lady Fowl is a genius unlike any other, and I have the upmost respect for her and her skills."

Artemis smirked, "Do not worry about my credentials Madam, I have already forwarded them to our esteemed Headmaster."

Albus nodded in confirmation, his blue eyes twinkling in amusement, "Lady Fowl has kindly provided me with her her multiple publications in Potions, as well as her Masters. She has also secured straight O's when she originally took her NEWTs at the age of 15."

Filius's jaw dropped, "You took your NEWTs at the age of 15? I thought you only discovered your magic at the age of 15."

"You are correct on both counts," Artemis spoke with an arrogant tone, "I had a good tutor."

Snape snorted, "Modesty does not suit you Artemis."

"Perhaps not, but at least I know how to take a compliment," She quickly retorted.

Minerva, who had caught on to the subtext, questioned, "Your personal tutor was Severus?"

Artemis nodded, "That's correct. He tutored me throughout the summer and proctored my exam. He has been a cherished friend ever since."

Snape tried not to roll his eyes. Maturity has done a lot for the criminal mastermind, but it did little to temper her love of dramatics. With age, Artemis stopped being as cold to people, instead choosing to fake politeness and manipulate them instead. It was more fun that way, she often claimed. Her startling beauty only aided her in this, people were quick to misjudge and trust a gorgeous woman, something she often took for granted.

Slowly, he drawled, "As you can see Dolores, Artemis has been trained by the very best in Potions: Me. I trust her to help run my classroom utterly and efficiently."

Albus laughed jovially, "See! There's no one better for the task than a person who is trusted by her direct supervisor. Snape has made a great choice."

Artemis smiled sweetly, "Why thank you dear Headmaster."

Hermione mumbled quietly to herself as she stared at her newest instructor, who sat above at the teachers table. Ron, getting annoyed of her constant muttering, finally spoke, "What are you going on about Hermione?"

The witch blinked in surprise, as if she had forgotten that she was currently surrounded by her peers at dinner, "Sorry, it's just… I swear I know her from somewhere."

"You mean Assistant Professor Fowl?" Harry asked, "Yeah, she does look a little familiar now that you mention it."

Ron snorted, "Oh come on, how would you know her? I don't even know her and I've been in the Wizarding World my entire life."

"Are you sure you've never seen her?" Hermione asked, "She seems to be quite good friends with Professor Snape, surely she's made an appearance before."

"I sure. Trust me, I would recognize a gorgeous woman like that anywhere, so believe me when I say that there is no way that I have ever seen her before," Ron stated, food spewing from his mouth.

"Ron!" Hermione lectured, "You can't just talk about one of our instructors like that! We have to respect her, not- not- not degrade her by-"

"Calling her gorgeous?" Ron questioned with a scoff, "That's not degrading her."

Before Hermione could completely turn red and explode in anger, Harry interjected, "But I really do recognize her. She looks so familiar."

"She's friends with Snape, mate," Ron shrugged, "Unless you've been hanging out with Slytherins, I really doubt you know her."

Severus leaned back into his luxurious emerald seat, the green flames from the fireplace casting an eerie, luminous glow across the expansive, elegantly decorated room.

"I am still unsure on how you secured what has to be the best room in Hogwarts," Snape drawled, sending a knowing look to his young friend who sat in the chair across his.

Artemis chuckled lowly, an almost evil sound, "The Headmaster and I have come to terms, it was merely an added notation to my contract."

Severus snorted, "Well regardless, I am just glad you are here. I can not thank you enough for answering my pleas."

Artemis smiled softly, a genuine one, "Of course I'd answer Severus. You are my dearest friend, never doubt that. Besides, I've always wanted to visit Hogwarts, and I thought this was as good an opportunity as any."

"Still, I am thankful. I hope I did not pry you away from any other important affairs?"
Artemis merely waved away his concerns, "No no, nothing of too much importance. I had just secured a deal with the Italian Mafia when I received your letter. All future correspondence can easily be handed from afar."

At this, she brought out a sleek, emerald mirrored smart-phone.

"One of my own inventions," She explained as she handed the device over, "A cellphone that can be used even in the technologically impervious Hogwarts."

"Astonishing," Snape muttered, examining the details of the well crafted device with awe, "How did you make this?"

Artemis smirked, "From the missing parts of a few, let us say grievously misplaced, pieces of Fairy Equipment."

Snape leveled a stare towards his criminally inclined friend, "In other words, from the pieces of Fairy Technology that you stole."

Severus Snape was perhaps the only wizard in the world, bar Artemis herself, that knew of the existence of the Fairy Civilization. His discovery of the people came to existence because of Holly's own meddling. Artemis made the mistake of introducing Severus to Holly as a friend after the mercurial Fairy caught the older man in the Fowl Manor, of course hiding his true identity as a wizard. Once Artemis began suffering from the Atlantis Complex, Holly went to Severus is desperation as the one person who knows Artemis better than herself, barring Butler. Thankfully Snape was able to diagnose her symptoms as a common Wizarding ailment, brewing up a potion and curing her from the disease.

That was the day the people learned of the Wizarding Community. It was also the day they almost all collectively murdered Artemis Fowl for keeping such a secret away from them. Thankfully, they left the young prodigy to her own devices, especially since she now had her own magical production that was purely hers, and not a product of Fairy magic.

Artemis chuckled, "Alright, fine. From the Fairy Technology that I stole. It is their own fault for leaving their equipment just lying around, ready for anyone to take. I did them a favor in teaching them this integral lesson."

Snape sighed in response, not willing to get into yet another argument on the ethical philosophies of criminal activity, "I digress, despite your questionable means that led to creating such a thing, you truly have constructed a masterpiece. I applaud you."

Artemis bowed in her seat, "Why thank you, good sir. I always appreciate flattery."

Snape chuckled, before his countenance changed, a serious look taking place, "Now, about why I asked you here."

"In your letter," Artemis began, "You mentioned that vile Umbridge woman, and your need for an assistant that you trust. I came to the conclusion that there was more to the story."

Snape nodded, "Much more. Tell me, what do you know about the Dark Lord?"

Butler hummed softly as he went through the therapeutic ritual of cleaning his gun. Artemis left yesterday for Hogwarts, the mysterious Wizarding school in Scotland, and he was all too upset at having to leave his charge. But not having any magic himself caused him to be utterly useless in the Wizarding World, a world he couldn't even enter barring Diagon Alley.

Suddenly his phone chimed, the personalized tone belonging to his life-long charge.

Butler, the Marcusio family will soon contact you regarding the selling of the latest Van Gogh. Make sure that it is being handled efficiently.

-Artemis Fowl II

Even when the Lady Fowl was far off and seemingly busy, she always made time to successfully run her shady business. He could only hope that Artemis will somehow not stick true to her character, and stay relatively safe this year that they are apart.

Unfortunately Butler sincerely doubted such a thing was even possible.